Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Carapace has made the group ‘Super Besties’

Carapace has added Chat Noir, Ladybug, Rena Rouge, Queen Bee

Rena Rouge has renamed themselves ‘Foxy Lady’

Queen Bee has renamed themselves ‘Rich and cute’

Carapace has renamed themselves ‘Turtle-y awesome’

Ladybug: This is a bad idea.

Chat Noir: Hi everyone!!!!!

Foxy Lady: Hi chat!! And im glad you have so much confidence in us <3

Rich and cute: I hope we don’t talk on this much, I’m a busy person.

Ladybug: Yes!! I was actually going to mention that – this chat is mainly for akumas, right?

Turtle-y awesome: also team bonding but yes

Ladybug: Ok, then we need some rules.

Rich and cute: Not to intrude on the rules thing but is anyone else literally dying

Foxy Lady: Yes

Chat Noir: yes

Turtle-y awesome: Woah, context??

Rich and cute: Ladybug

Turtle-y awesome: Oh

Turtle-y awesome: yes

Ladybug: Rule #1, no making Ladybug uncomfortable!!

Chat Noir has renamed ‘Ladybug’ ‘Team Leader’

Chat Noir: Go crazy, kids. Loophole.

Team Leader: ?????

Rich and cute: Lmao what else do u expect us to do on here

Team Leader: talk about akumas maybe??? Idk

Team Leader: not like this chat was made for any specific reason or anything

Foxy Lady: hfovjhlvdjoa shade

Turtle-y awesome: but… we can still talk about other stuff right

Team Leader: Rule #2 don’t use the @ unless it’s serious stuff

Team Leader: I’m not very good at checking my phone but if you @ me for no reason I’ll ignore u all

Rich and cute: cold

Foxy Lady: Umm chat where u at

Chat Noir: Sorry, still fangirling. Continue.

Team Leader: #3 is no identity stuff!!

Rich and cute: : ((((((((((

Team Leader: Mk we all know who you are but for the rest of us

Foxy Lady: I actually agree with that one

Foxy Lady: What if someone gets our phone

Chat Noir has renamed themselves ‘Purr-fect’

Purr-fect: Nobody will suspect a thing.

Rich and cute: Is there a facepalm emoji? I need a facepalm emoji

Team Leader: You guys!!! We need more rules

Turtle-y awesome: rule #4 no more rules

Foxy Lady: kinda weak but u go babe

Turtle-y awesome: thanks babe

Purr-fect: Rule #5 no pda it’s gross

Team Leader: fair

Rich and cute: fair

Foxy Lady: Not fair?!

Team Leader: we should write these down somewhere

Purr-fect: My Lady!! That’s… lame!!

Rich and cute: how dare you insult her like that

Foxy Lady: !!!!!PDA!!!!!

Rich and cute: rule #6 pda for ladybug is allowed

Turtle-y awesome: fair

Foxy Lady: fair

Purr-fect: fair

Team Leader: I was literally gone for like ten seconds wtf

Rich and cute has renamed the group ‘Ladybug cult’

Team Leader: I feel very uncomfortable

Foxy Lady: But Ladybug… we luv you

Rich and cute: <33333333333

Team Leader: I will beat you up

Purr-fect: hot

Turtle-y awesome: !!!!!PDA!!!!!

Rich and cute: uh no

Rich and cute: we only celebrate Ladybug here

Rich and cute: and whilst chat is being gross

Rich and cute: he’s abiding the laws

Team Leader: I am so uncomfortable right now

Purr-fect: Hey, how come Ladybug gets proper capitalization but I don’t?

Rich and cute: because she’s worth it

Rich and cute: and because you type like a nun

Turtle-y awesome: do nuns even have phones???

Foxy Lady: Off topic

Foxy Lady: Probably not

Team Leader: ANYWAY

Team Leader: I’ll probably mute this chat? I’ll come on as much as possible but I live a busy life : ((( plus superhero duties

Team Leader: as I said, @ me when there’s a problem

Rich and cute: sad, the superhero thing is kind of a full time job we should be getting paid

Rich and cute: just googled the nun thing it depends on the convent

Rich and cute: wonder if they have their own finances

Team Leader: ALSO

Team Leader: my data plan is shitty so if you text me about an akuma and I haven’t responded but I’ve read it im probably on the way??? I’ll try my best though

Foxy Lady: oh my god she swears

Turtle-y awesome: oh my god she has a phone

Rich and cute: Ladybug… relating to the every day person??? Unfathomable

Foxy Lady: says u you hypocrite

Rich and cute: Did you just… use u and you one after the other

Foxy Lady: gotta get that contrast in + it’s a gay thing

Rich and cute: fair

Purr-fect: fair

Turtle-y awesome: fair

Team Leader: fair

Turtle-y awesome: I think we all relate

Team Leader: whilst that would be an interesting conversation… back to the topic on hand???

Purr-fect: Yes My Lady!!! Share your wisdom!!!

Team Leader: when was I actually elected team leader

Foxy Lady: it was u or chat take a lucky guess

Team Leader: but… shouldn’t this be like a joint thing???

Purr-fect: Communism never succeeds, My Lady.

Foxy Lady: weirdly ominous but also true

Purr-fect: Thanks, my history tutor says it to me every five minutes

Turtle-y awesome: lmao I have a friend who’s tutor says the same thing

Team Leader: wasn’t there a rule about personal stuff????

Team Leader: rule #7 NO IDENTITY STUFF

Foxy Lady: that was rule #3

Foxy Lady: thought you were supposed to be writing these down :/

Rich and cute: how dare u insult her

Team Leader: it’s me or communism take ur pick

Rich and cute: …is it bad im still attracted

Purr-fect: no I relate

Foxy Lady: the entire world relates

Foxy Lady: im in a relationship and both me and my boyfriend relate

Turtle-y awesome: can indeed confirm

Team Leader: can’t take this bullying anymore

Team Leader: when I get back the rules will be memorised

Purr-fect: Rules are meant to be broken, M’Lady.

Rich and cute: says u

Team Leader: no??? they literally aren’t??? that’s the entire point???

Team Leader: whatever

Team Leader: night u guys

Team Leader: if you don’t get sufficient sleep I will murder u

Purr-fect: Good night, Bugaboo!!!!!

Foxy Lady: bye you guys have good dreams or whatever

Rich and cute: I respect that you guys have good sleep schedules but im just gonna hang out

Purr-fect: Haha same!

Rich and cute: Want to watch a movie?

Purr-fect: I do! I have a rabb.it account! Ladybug introduced me to it.

Rich and cute: Let’s watch a Ghibli movie, they always make me kinda sleepy

23:09

Rich and cute: Chat? Did you fall asleep?

Rich and cute: whatever good night

Chapter Text

Group: Ladybug cult

08:13

Rich and cute: good morning, cruel world

Rich and cute: anyone else dying?

Team Leader: couldn’t even go back to sleep, so I’ve chugged two coffees and am now shaking sufficiently

Turtle-y awesome: sorry I missed it

Team Leader: tbh I don’t blame you

Team Leader: seems like the only alarms I don’t sleep through are akuma attack ones – and that’s because I have my kwami to hound me

Purr-fect: Is everyone okay?

Rich and cute: we should be asking you that

Foxy Lady: morning y’all has anyone got a spare will to live

Purr-fect: I’m good!!!!! And good morning Rena!!!

Foxy Lady: don’t avoid the question Chat

Purr-fect: I’m good, I promise

Purr-fect: My kwami absorbed like 90% of the damage so now my ribs are a little sore, but Plagg is happily eating cheese.

Purr-fect: Everything will be good as new in a few days!

Team Leader: whatever you say

Team Leader: how about everyone else? Apart from the obvious sleep deprivation.

Foxy Lady: I’m good.

Turtle-y awesome: same

Rich and cute: I’m also managing

Team Leader: Good. Whilst I wasn’t sleeping, I had time to think about a couple things

Foxy Lady: oop are we in trouble

Team Leader: no!!! I was referring to patrols

Team Leader: up until now Chat and I took the brunt of them, but I was thinking if you guys didn’t mind dedicating your time we could do two patrols a week, and we don’t really need a whole group meeting, we can just talk on here

Foxy Lady: lotta words

Turtle-y awesome: that sounds fair!

Rich and cute: tbh I was waiting for you guys to bring that up

Rich and cute: patrolling seems fun

Purr-fect: It is!! It really helps to clear your head, and Paris is really pretty at night.

Team Leader: but it gets a bit much doing it two hours a day, three hours a week, you know?

Purr-fect: I can take the first shift! I like getting out of the house.

Rich and cute: …is that positive or no

Turtle-y awesome: u good chat?

Purr-fect: no I’m fine!!! Promise.

Team Leader: his optimism is flawless

Team Leader: how do we tell when it’s fake

Foxy Lady: we’ll come back to it

Turtle-y awesome: back to patrols – I can do the second?

Foxy Lady: I vote we literally go in a circle unless someone can’t do one day

Rich and cute: I’ll go third

Team Leader: what is this, a playground

Foxy Lady: omg u guys

Foxy Lady: Ladybug and I had the same childhood

Turtle-y awesome: yesss me too im so honoured

Rich and cute: can’t relate

Team Leader: stoppp im uncomfortable

Team Leader: also why is this chat still called ladybug cult

Team Leader: im unoriginal. Someone else change it

Purr-fect: My Lady, you could never be unoriginal!

Turtle-y awesome has renamed the group ‘Lucky Charm’

Turtle-y awesome: I tried. I thought it was clever.

Foxy Lady: it was a good try babe

Turtle-y awesome: thanks babe

Rich and cute: !!!!!PDA!!!!!

Purr-fect: They are literally just doing it to wind us up, which is mean

Team Leader: idk about you guys but my school starts in like 10 mins and I haven’t even left yet so byeee

Foxy Lady: lmao I’m already at my school

Rich and cute: Ladybug could never be late she’s perfect

Purr-fect: Bye My Lady!!!!! Have fun at school today!!!!

Team Leader: thanks chat

Team Leader: are you secretly twelve

Purr-fect: What? No!!! Why would you say that?

Team Leader: the puns… the typing…

Foxy Lady: now that you’ve pointed it out…

Rich and cute: it could make sense…

Turtle-y awesome: …

Purr-fect: Literally shut up I’m almost eighteen

Purr-fect: I’m too tall to be a twelve-year-old boy.

Purr-fect: If we’re judging by height, Ladybug should be like nine.

Team Leader: Rude!!!!

Team Leader: I’m actually leaving now.

Rich and cute: haha im taller than Ladybug fools read it and weep

Foxy Lady: I’m older than u chat

Foxy Lady: why does that sound so strange

Turtle-y awesome: so am I actually! I’m already eighteen

Purr-fect: Well don’t rub it in my face

Foxy Lady: we can do so many things, chat…

Turtle-y awesome: drink alcohol…

Foxy Lady: vote…

Turtle-y awesome: get tattoos…

Foxy Lady: get married…

Turtle-y awesome: hey babe that was my one

Foxy Lady: read off google like the rest of us you coward

Purr-fect: I now understand what Ladybug was feeling as she was being bullied.

Rich and cute: if it helps I’m also seventeen

Purr-fect: But I know your civilian identity and you could literally get whatever you want.

Rich and cute: I tried u guys,,,,, didnt work out

Team Leader: I made it into school!!

Purr-fect: Welcome back My Lady! You must live really close to your school.

Team Leader: yea, walking distance, although im usually late in the morning because of it

Team Leader: what did I miss?

Foxy Lady: ahem excuse me imma go cry in a pillow idk if that was a Hamilton reference or not

Team Leader: it was, but I was also genuinely asking

Foxy Lady: if u hear screaming its me not an akuma

Turtle-y awesome: apparently chat and queenie are babies of the group

Purr-fect: I’m almost eighteen!!

Team Leader: I’m still seventeen too, but I know queenie’s birthday is after mine by a long shot

Team Leader: team baby

Team Leader has renamed Rich and cute ‘Team Baby’

Team Baby: I should be offended but I match Ladybug I can’t scrounge up anger

Purr-fect: I want to match!!!

Purr-fect has renamed themselves ‘Team Chat’

Team Chat: mwahaha

Team Leader: yeah he’s like seven

Team Chat: Fight Me

Team Leader: bring it on leather boy

Foxy Lady: oof no

Turtle-y awesome: never again

Team Leader: I shot my shot it didn’t land i regret nothing

Team Baby: the cringe is real

Team Chat has renamed themselves ‘Leather Boy’

Leather Boy: My Lady finally gave me a nickname that isn’t just another word for Chat, I’ll take it.

Team Leader: oop my teacher just walked in bye u guys

Foxy Lady: lmao same

Foxy Lady: rule follower

Team Leader: don’t get caught!!! U need ur phone for super secret emergencies

Team Leader: goodbye!!!

Leather Boy: Goodbye, My Lady!

Turtle-y awesome: rule follower

Team Baby: :/

Team Baby: she has a point…

Foxy Lady: literally leave me alone I won’t get caught I’m putting away my phone now

Turtle-y awesome: talk to u guys later : )))

Chapter Text

Group: Lucky Charm

02:56

Turtle-y awesome: yo u guys

Turtle-y awesome: nothing akuma related

Turtle-y awesome: but have you guys ever noticed that I’m practically a teenage mutant ninja turtle?

Turtle-y awesome has renamed themselves ‘Michelangelo’

Michelangelo: chat I know you’re there it says you’re online

Leather Boy: Sorry!!! I thought you were having a moment.

Leather Boy: Also, it’s like 3am, and I was trying to sleep.

Michelangelo: haha same, I was woken up by this weird crash like ten minutes ago and I’ve been thinking about it ever since.

Leather Boy: Weird crash…?

Michelangelo: lmao what

Leather Boy: Is it an akuma?

Michelangelo: oh

Michelangelo: oh shit

Michelangelo: Rena is going to kill me

03:20

Team Leader: get some sleep y’all

Team Leader: also, thanks to @Leather Boy @Michelangelo for showing up after we purified the akuma, it was greatly appreciated

Michelanglo: it’s not my fault hawkmoth never sleeps

Foxy Lady: babe it was so obvious

Foxy Lady: you were woken by a crash

Foxy Lady: what would it be except for an akuma

Team Baby: in a way I’m weirdly happy he finally had that epiphany

Team Baby: although Raphael is obviously the best turtle

Foxy Lady: no leo

Team Leader: tbh, that show brings up weird memories for me, I had a childhood friend who had a legitimate crush on one of them

Michelangelo: lmao they were hot what do u expect

Team Leader: eww

Foxy Lady: do you think there’s TMNT fanfiction

Team Baby: probably, don’t really want that in my search history though

Team Leader: fair

Michelangelo: fair

Leather Boy: Just googled, the answer is that there is a lot of stuff out there.

Leather Boy: Ladybug, care to elaborate?

Team Leader: that is literally the entire story

Team Leader: she had a massive crush on Donatello, to the point where she could quote everything he said in the show

Team Leader: she probably wrote smut about him tbh

Foxy Lady: it’s like half past 3 in the am I did not expect to be talking with the Ladybug about TMNT porn

Team Leader: not porn, smut

Team Leader: it’s different

Michelangelo: eww people write smut about me

Team Leader: me too bitch you aren’t that special

Michelangelo: I was talking about the ninja turtle…

Team Leader: my statement still remains

Foxy Lady: there are many Ladynoir shippers

Team Baby: umm Ladynoir isn’t the only ship

Team Baby: are we not going to acknowledge that this means that all of us read fanfic

Team Leader: who our age doesn’t read fanfic

Foxy Lady: I even wrote it for a while before it started getting written about me and became weird

Team Leader: you lucky bitch I wish I was good at writing

Team Baby: you literally save Paris on a daily basis wtf

Michelangelo: I’m sure you’ve got talents Ladybug

Team Leader: : (((((((((((((

Leather Boy: Yo team baby can you change your name, I’m getting confused.

Team Baby: how dare you

Team Baby: use the word ‘yo’ unironically

Team Baby has renamed Leather Boy ‘heathen’

Team Baby has renamed themselves ‘Rich and cute’

Rich and cute: I liked this nickname but it didn’t get its deserved time in the sun

heathen has renamed themselves ‘Heathen’

Heathen: there we go

Michelangelo: lmaoo wtf

Team Leader: at this point I have learnt that it is just better not to judge

Team Leader: now sleep its late

Heathen: night bugaboo

Michelangelo: night y’all

Foxy Lady: babe u aren’t American

09:46

Foxy Lady: my nickname is the only one that hasn’t been changed

Foxy Lady: plus the group name is shitty

Foxy Lady: help me come up with ideas

Team Leader: im in the middle of a test

Team Leader: muting y’all

Heathen: Me too My Lady! But I finished a few minutes ago. Rena, what kind of name do u want?

Foxy Lady: a good one preferably

Michelangelo: I’m here coz I am also in a test but everyone is on their phones so like

Team Leader: !!!!!PERSONAL STUFF!!!!

Michelangelo: oh no we’re all taking a test this bad luck must mean we are all in the same class :/

Foxy Lady: haha as if

Rich and cute: I’m in an art lesson so go wild rena what do u want ur name to be

Foxy Lady: im asking u guys for ideas!!!

Rich and cute has renamed Foxy Lady ‘The other one’

The other one: rude

The other one: take two; Carapace it’s ur turn

Michelangelo has renamed The other one ‘Carapace’s bae’

Carapace’s bae: still eww??? Idk it’s slightly better but im still not feeling it u know

Carapace’s bae: Chat go

Heathen: aaahhhhh what do I do

Carapace’s bae: aww look he’s learning to type like a human being

Heathen has renamed Carapace’s bae ‘Not Volphina’

Not Volphina: fhdshlflhfd that bitch

Not Volphina: I really thought we could come up with a good one

Not Volphina has renamed themselves ‘Foxy Ladu’

Foxy Ladu: I guess not : (

Heathen: ladu

Michelangelo: ladu

Rich and cute: ladu

Team Leader: ladu

Foxy Ladu: tf Ladybug I thought you were doing a test

Team Leader: I got curious sue me

Team Leader has renamed Foxy Ladu ‘Foxy Lad’

Team Leader: haha its like we’re british

Foxy Lad: says u

Foxy Lad has renamed Team Leader ‘Literally a bug’

Literally a bug: hey

Literally a bug: u said it yourself, I save Paris once a day

Rich and cute: actually that was me but im not complaining

Literally a bug: shddfjkbj im failing my test

Literally a bug: its physics

Literally a bug: I hate physics

Heathen: !!!!!PERSONAL STUFF!!!

Literally a bug: lov u chat but what’s the equation for work done

Rich and cute: force x distance

Rich and cute: …

Rich and cute has reamed themselves ‘Rich and smart’

Rich and smart: ;)))))))

Literally a bug: ur the best!!!!

Rich and smart: fsdldadfjhjdodfjjdksodkjfd

Rich and smart: what are brain functions

Heathen has renamed Rich and smart ‘Rich and gay’

Rich and gay: accurate

Heathen: My test is about to end, and I should hide my phone before the teacher sees! Bye everyone!!!

Foxy Lad: I’m legit in the same situation, bye u guys

Rich and gay: u can’t just leave me here

Michelangelo: im still here : ((((

Rich and gay: ye but im gay cant u read the nickname

Michelangelo: me too bitch join the club

Michelangelo: well right now im dating a girl but I would be very happy to get at chat noir if the chance ever presented itself

Heathen: …

Michelangelo: haha ok bye

Chapter Text

Group: Lucky Charm

07:03

Literally a bug has renamed themselves ‘Ladybug’

Ladybug: I should not be awake

Ladybug: I should have twelve more minutes to sleep before my first alarm goes off

Ladybug: im in pain

Ladybug: you guuuuys

Ladybug: fine im going back to sleep

07:32

Rich and gay: u guys I need advice

Rich and gay: and I know y’all are up because you’re reading my messages

Foxy Lad: ok what’s happening

Michelangelo: give us the deets

Rich and gay: I like a girl I want to ask her out how

Rich and gay: also I cant speak to her coz im scared so

Michelangelo: big mood

Foxy Lad: literally shut up

Foxy Lad: are u guys close? Like hang out just the two of you outside of school close

Rich and gay: well I mean yeah probably

Rich and gay: civilian me doesn’t have many friends remember people hate me

Michelangelo: big oof

Foxy Lad: babe ur not helping

Michelangelo: im showing I feel her

Foxy Lad: no ur not

Rich and gay: no you’re not

Rich and gay: haha snap

Rich and gay: now help

Foxy Lad: just kind of be like ‘hi do u want to go on a not platonic date with me’ and then smile

Rich and gay: can’t do that

Foxy Lad: why not???

Rich and gay: she intimidates me

Rich and gay: she’s like,,, super strong all the time

Rich and gay: she’s bros with one of my hoes

Rich and gay: they take fencing together

Heathen: Did you just call Adrien Agreste a hoe?

Rich and gay: how do you know it was Adrien

Heathen: My incredible deduction skills, obviously

Michelangelo: morning chat

Heathen: Good morning Carapace!!! How are you?

Michelangelo: caffeinated

Rich and gay: uhm hi help im still panicking

Rich and gay: it took me a really long time to tell her I like girls and she told me she likes girls too and I ksivsjndofo

Rich and gay: u know?

Foxy Lad: get her flowers?

Rich and gay: I don’t know if she’d appreciate something as superficial as that

Michelangelo: damn Chloe that was some poetic shit

Rich and gay: im practically Sappho

Rich and gay: old, lesbian, can only talk about girls

Ladybug: shut up you’re like twelve

Rich and gay: ???seventeen???

Heathen: Good Morning My Lady!!!

Ladybug: haha hi Chat wassup

Heathen: ???????????

Ladybug: sorry im tired don’t take me seriously

Rich and gay: ladybug help me

Ladybug: I’m guessing you’re talking about kagami??

Rich and gay: yeah

Rich and gay: you know her coz she was akumatised right?

Ladybug: haha yeah totally

Ladybug: sorry

Ladybug: anyway I think flowers are a safe bet

Ladybug: what’s her favourite colour?

Rich and gay: idk it hasn’t really come up

Rich and gay: she hated me for a really long time and then we got caught in an akuma attack together and we ended up talking about the reason we hated each other, and it was all this huge misunderstanding

Rich and gay: then I told her I was gay

Rich and gay: now I want to ask her out

Rich and gay: she wears red a lot?? Or maybe purple

Heathen: It’s white

Heathen: Trust me on this one

Rich and gay: ok I can get her white flowers

Foxy Lad: lillies?

Michelangelo: dasies?

Ladybug: tulips are always cute, or roses

Rich and gay: shjsjdifhdks you’re making this hard

Heathen: Pick the flowers you like the most, Queenie

Heathen: Good luck!!

Rich and gay: don’t you dare leave me im not ready yet

Ladybug: haha what if you got Ladybug to deliver the flowers with a special note

Rich and gay: don’t you dare go after my woman Ladybug

Michelangelo: this is surprisingly entertaining

Foxy Lad: babe literally stop she’s stressing

Foxy Lad: but everything will be fine

Foxy Lad: we better be the first to know what happens

Rich and gay: wait wait what about if she asks where we’re going

Ladybug: dinner and a movie

Ladybug: works every time

Michelangelo: yeah you can chat over dinner and snuggle for the movie

Rich and gay: is it too early to invite her to my house to watch the movie?

Ladybug: has she been to your house before

Rich and gay: well, yeah, everyone’s been to the hotel

Ladybug: but like with you

Rich and gay: no

Foxy Lad: doesn’t matter make your move

Heathen: You got this Chloe!!!

Rich and gay: I’ll update you guys in a couple of hours

Ladybug: good luck!!!

Michelangelo: luck!

Foxy Lad: … how else do u tell ur idiot boyfriend off

15:19

Rich and gay has renamed themselves ‘Rich and taken’

Rich and taken: GUESS WHICH HOE GOT HERSELF A DATE

Rich and taken: IT’S ME BITCH

Ladybug: congratulations!!!!!!!!! How did it go?

Rich and taken: I saw her outside her locker and gave her the flowers, and told her I liked her and asked her if she wanted to go out with me

Rich and taken: she was so cuteee omg she blushed and said she’d ask her mom but hopefully yes

Rich and taken: and then she called her mom and we’re going to hang out tonight

Foxy Lad: I always though kagami’s mom was uptight

Rich and taken: I think she sees me as a good person to be around because my father’s the mayor

Rich and taken: to be honest I don’t care

Rich and taken: omg

Heathen: What?

Rich and taken: what do I wear?

Michelangelo: ofdhodhd you useless lesbian

Michelangelo has renamed Rich and taken ‘Useless Lesbiam’

Useless Lesbiam: lesbiam

Ladybug: lesbiam

Michelangelo: stop??? There are bigger issues at hand

Useless Lesbiam: you broke my ‘Rich and __’ train

Michelangelo: oh well

Useless Lesbiam: I think im gonna touch up my makeup but wear what I’m wearing now

Useless Lesbiam: thanks u guys

Useless Lesbiam: also I cant make patrol

Foxy Lad: yeah no shit

Ladybug: don’t worry, I’ll cover you

Ladybug: your social life is more important

Useless Lesbiam: sjhfgfjefjhgfjk <333333

Heathen: Have fun on your date!!

Useless Lesbiam: haha thanks Chat

Heathen: My Lady, do you want some company on your patrol tonight?

Ladybug: that would be nice

Foxy Lad: gah im third wheeling bye

Michelangelo: im??? Right here????

Chapter Text

Group: Lucky Charm

23:48

Heathen: Akuma just outside that one school where everyone gets akumatised

Useless Lesbaim: sohekd I’m up I’ll tease u about improper use of grammar tomorrow

Ladybug: omw

Ladybug: details?

Heathen: Someone was kicked out of a club, I think

Ladybug: it’s a Wednesday

Heathen: Which is probably why they kicked him out at midnight.

Ladybug: eta 2 mins hang in there chat

Useless Lesbiam: im here where r u

00:31

Ladybug: is everyone okay?

Useless Lesbiam: miserable but yes

Heathen: Ladybug, are you okay?

Ladybug: yeah I will be by morning

Ladybug: Carapace? Your shield took a beating

Michelangelo: all good im going to sleep

Ladybug: understandable. Night y’all

Heathen: Goodnight, My Lady.

Useless Lesbiam: night

08:23

Foxy Lad: uurrrgh guess who’s a sick bitch

Foxy Lad: rlly sorry I wasn’t there last night, the medicine I took knocked me out for 12 hours straight

Ladybug: lucky u I am dying

Heathen: How are you physically?

Ladybug: exhausted

Ladybug: and a bit sore, if that’s what you’re after

Ladybug: I’ll patrol today and my kwami can heal me a bit

Ladybug: or take a much needed nap in the suit

Michelangelo: nap??? Im in

Useless Lesbiam: superhero sleepover

Useless Lesbiam: im up for it

Foxy Lad: I’m sick don’t you dare do this without me

Michelangelo: aww babe we’d never leave you

Ladybug: pda

Useless Lesbiam: where’s the enthusiasm??

Heathen: !!!!!PDA!!!!!

Useless Lesbiam: yea like that

Ladybug: it’s too early for all that noise

Ladybug: it’s too early for capital letters

Heathen: I don’t think that’s how it works, My Lady.

Ladybug: ugh my head the capitals

Heathen: sorry

Useless Lesbiam: wooooowwww

Useless Lesbiam: well you all know my civilian identity so if you ever want to do that sleepover thing show up at the hotel??

Heathen: We should arrange a date

Useless Lesbiam: omg chat im already tating someone

Ladybug: tating

Michelangelo: tating

Foxy Lad: trating

Ladybug: aww rena u tried ur best

Foxy Lad: literally shut up

Foxy Lad: im SICK

Ladybug: ah capitals

Heathen: My Lady, I’m beginning to think you’re making up the capitals thing.

Ladybug: when I see capitals my brain reads them a loud way its too early for that shit

Michelangelo: surprisingly valid

Michelangelo: yo, has anyone else realized that akumas are getting stronger and stronger?

Ladybug: yeah

Michelangelo: do you think we’re getting closer to the end?

Ladybug: hope so

Heathen: Yeah, me too.

Heathen: I can’t imagine fighting Hawkmoth for the rest of our lives.

Useless Lesbiam: how old do you think Hawkmoth is?

Ladybug: older than us

Michelangelo: I want to say childbearing age???

Foxy Lad: I agree

Foxy Lad: although I cant imagine someone that physically evil being a child

Heathen: You’d be surprised

Useless Lesbiam: ^^^^^^^ what he said

Ladybug: uuhhh are you guys okay?

Heathen: I’m okay My Lady! Not something to talk about right now.

Useless Lesbiam: yeah me too family sucks that’s about it

Ladybug: im sorry

Foxy Lad: oof

Michelangelo: press f to pay respects

Foxy Lad: f

Foxy Lad: -uck you

Foxy Lad: old meme bitch

Michelangelo: this is harassment

Michelangelo: ladybug

Ladybug: yeah yeah I saw I cant be asked to sort it out

Ladybug: work hard y’all I have to go to school

Ladybug: feel better soon rena

Foxy Lad: <333

Useless Lesbiam: <3

Heathen: <3

Michelangelo: <3333

Foxy Lad: @Michelangelo </3333

Michelangelo: : (

11:57

Ladybug: akuma attack in the park

Foxy Lad: won’t be able to make it

Michelangelo: yeah me either im in a test, can’t leave to transform

Michelangelo: + it isn’t close enough to my school for them to evacuate so I could escape

Ladybug: it’s okay, Carapace focus on your test

Ladybug: @Heathen @Useless Lesbiam

Heathen: I’m here!!

Ladybug: aim for wrist

12:14

Ladybug: ok I have to sleep

Ladybug: how can I fake sick

Foxy Lad: at my school they have a thing where if you’re tired enough they let you nap for an hour before sending you back to lessons

Ladybug: I’ll check it out

Ladybug: night

Heathen: Is she gone?

Useless Lesbiam: I think so

Heathen: Does anyone else feel like Ladybug carries most of this stuff?

Heathen: Like, we’re all having a bad time, but if we have to miss an akuma, we miss it. She has to be at every one.

Useless Lesbiam: I never really thought about it

Michelangelo: yo y’all guess who finished his test

Michelangelo: oh

Michelangelo: yeah I see that

Michelangelo: have you got a solution?

Heathen: I don’t know.

Heathen: Do we really need patrols? We have akuma alerts on our phones, kwamis to wake us up when they feel the bad energy, and limited time.

Heathen: It may be a good idea to limit it by either doing one a week, or cutting it down even more.

Heathen: Besides, we should probably leave the general crime to the police without taking their jobs.

Michelangelo: we can discuss it with LB when she gets up.

Useless Lesbiam: that’s actually a pretty good solution

Useless Lesbiam: now let’s bury this conversation through keysmash

Useless Lesbiam: ksoifhndclvgfhresdlcvighfrbenmskdiughfnemskdifh

Heathen: sdfhenwmdlfiguhrendkfighrenmkdofi

Michelangelo: sodifhneodif

Useless Lesbiam: wpoeijfhjd

Michelangelo: sofhgflskfhrejwoeifuvhn

Heathen: Key smashing makes me uncomfortable what if I break my keyboard

Useless Lesbiam: smh you don’t actually smash your keyboard

Useless Lesbiam: you just kind of type randomly all at once

Heathen: Oh.

Heathen: poeirfhgjkwlsdlfgjhfrhekwosodckjvbghfruiedkmvnghfreidfkvghfrueidkfvnghfrueidk

Heathen: That is much more satisfying.

13:19

Ladybug: you idiots I can still see the messages

Ladybug: oh

Ladybug: we can talk about all of that later

Ladybug: but thank you guys

Ladybug: and I mean this shit

Ladybug: I couldn’t have done this without you

Ladybug: I would have been dead physically AND mentally by now

Ladybug: <333

Heathen: sofughfjskldocivhgfreldfvoighfbendmvgirhn

Heathen: Look, My Lady, I mastered the keysmash

Ladybug: …

Heathen: <3

Ladybug: <3

Chapter Text

Group: Lucky Charm

15:50

Ladybug: ok y’all I have some shit to say

Useless Lesbiam: oop

Useless Lesbiam: MOVE ASIDE LADYBUG HAS SOMETHING SHE WANTS TO SAY

Ladybug: fuck u

Ladybug: im pissed

Heathen: What’s wrong? Oifhje

Useless Lesbiam: yes get that keysmash but now is not an appropriate time

Heathen: Oh. When is?

Useless Lesbiam: let Ladybug spill her tea, I’ll show you

Useless Lesbiam: go go Ladybug

Ladybug: ok so im gonna try to keep this impersonal

Ladybug: there’s this girl in my class, let’s call her A

Ladybug: no not A let’s call her L for Liar

Michelangelo: im here spill that tea

Ladybug: yo Carapce sit back grab that popcorn

Ladybug: ok so L is a lying bitch as you may have gathered

Ladybug: she lies about being my (Ladybug’s) best friend??? (And I know half of paris does this) but everyone just… believes her??? I don’t get it

Ladybug: anyway, in the past she’s threatened me, given me the whole ‘oh im going to ruin your life just because you saw through my lies, everyone’s going to turn on you because they believe me’ shit

Ladybug: ^^^ that was practically word for word ok

Ladybug: and so whenever we’re alone she always tells me this

Ladybug: BUT TODAY

Ladybug: THAT BITCH

Ladybug: ok so previously she’s walked down stairs, sat at the bottom and literally started crying right

Ladybug: and because im at the top of this staircase and nobody was around, I got blamed for pushing her???

Ladybug: OUR SCHOOL HAS CCTV WTF

Ladybug: anyway so today

Ladybug: L and I were in the hallway getting textbooks

Ladybug: and she literally slapped herself across the cheek

Ladybug: idk the science but her slapping herself would leave a different handprint to mine

Ladybug: PLUS my hands are literally tiny!!!! And hers are gigantic monster bitch hands

Ladybug: so I got suspended

Ladybug: ALSO IN THE PAST this thing happened where she got me expelled, but then confessed to being a compulsive liar

Ladybug: IF SHE CONFESSES TO BEING A COMPULSIVE LIAR WHY DOES EVERYONE BELIEVE HER

Ladybug: UURGGGGHHHHH

Ladybug: poiufhrjwpoeifuhgbfdjeodkmcnvbhfjdkl

Heathen: kwoeirfhghrjewo

Useless Lesbiam: not now, chat

Useless Lesbiam: that was a rage keysmash

Ladybug: so yeah that’s my situation if you hear aggravated screaming it is me I am SO annoyed at that bitch

Heathen: I have a friend in a similar situation, except she hasn’t been threatened by her friend. She also got suspended today, although my teacher didn’t release the details of why and the Liar in my class didn’t come back.

Michelangelo: lmao one of my friends was also suspended today

Michelangelo: don’t know what she did though

Useless Lesbiam: there’s a token Bitch in every school

Useless Lesbiam: used to be me but I’ve been overtaken

Useless Lesbiam: Y’all know my civilian identity right so I can release names

Ladybug: you know what yeah sure chloe go wild

Useless Lesbiam: k so there’s this girl called Lila in my class

Useless Lesbiam: literally horrible

Useless Lesbiam: she’s so obvious about her lies it hurts like once she said she was travelling with her parents, but we skyped her four times and the backdrop never changed

Useless Lesbiam: also her snap map said she was in Paris AND she posted a stock image once on her story and that’s it

Useless Lesbiam: like what??? If you’re going to be a lying fucking cow, at least put some dang effort into it

Useless Lesbiam: and the worst part is almost all of the people in my class believe her

Useless Lesbiam: as far as I know of, there are two that are on my side

Useless Lesbiam: you guys know I’m friends with that model Adrien right

Heathen: Yes.

Ladybug: yea

Michelangelo: yup

Useless Lesbiam: yeah, he’s a dork. Anyways, he sees through her lies

Useless Lesbiam: plus this other girl called Marinette, but Lila always targets her because marinette always wants to do good, and doesn’t want to see others hurt, so she tried to expose her once

Useless Lesbiam: I used to hate marinette but then I realized im gay af and I was just fixiating on Adrien so now it’s all chill

Useless Lesbiam: for a while I thought she liked him lmao

Ladybug: woifhwodifughfrjeiow9euhfjkd

Heathen: spoeriuthrenwkldoivughren

Useless Lesbiam: both of your keysmashes were in the wrong there

Useless Lesbiam: gosh can’t we just bitch in peace

Useless Lesbiam: @Michelangelo you’re up

Michelangelo: my life is drama free dude

Michelangelo: not a mofoing care in the world

Ladybug: are you 9 or are you 40

Michelangelo: excuse me I am a fully fledged eighteen year old

Heathen: Me too!

Ladybug: you can all go fuck yourselves

Ladybug: chloe and I are still dancing queens

Ladybug: young and sweet

Useless Lesbiam: only seventeen

Ladybug: I was going to say that

Useless Lesbiam: yeah no shit

Ladybug: ANYWAY

Ladybug: chat you’re up

Ladybug: spill everything

Heathen: I don’t really have that much to tell.

Useless Lesbiam: to spill

Heathen: ???

Useless Lesbiam: you spill tea

Heathen: And?

Useless Lesbiam: akspfoiuehej he’s hopeless

Heathen: Oh! You keysmash in frustration!

Useless Lesbiam: ye u do

Heathen: Well then sodvhgfrenwkslxocivugfhrews

Heathen: What does tea have to do with this?

Heathen: wpodifuvhgfenmwlscpoviughfreksdlocifuh

Ladybug: u know what he’s getting there just leave him be

Useless Lesbiam: he is completely hopeless

Michelangelo: A* comedy

Michelangelo: hey what if chat actually understands all the memes and is playing us all

Heathen: I know what a meme is! It’s a funny photo and a piece of text.

Heathen: I googled it a while ago.

Useless Lesbiam: a true baby

Useless Lesbiam has renamed Heathen ‘A baby’

A baby: I am not a baby.

A baby has renamed themselves ‘Chat Noir’

Chat Noir: I am the defender of Paris!

Chat Noir: I am fierce and strong!

Chat Noir: I am 6 foot 3 and still growing, I think!

Ladybug: literally no need for that

Ladybug: us shorties are feeling the pain

Useless Lesbiam: who is us you’re the small one

Ladybug: ojhfndlodihffreodk

Ladybug: don’t rub it in

Chat Noir: It’s ok, My Lady! You’re small just like a Ladybug!

Ladybug: then how come you’re massive

Chat Noir: Genetics!

Ladybug: oh my literal god leave science out of this I hate biology

Michelangelo: you can say that again

Useless Lesbiam: I also hate science

Useless Lesbiam: but only because I have literally the worst teacher in the world

Useless Lesbiam: she talks at us for an hour and then expects us to have absorbed all of that information

Michelangelo: believe me, I relate

Ladybug: there have been 2 akumas today right

Ladybug: there shouldn’t be any more

Useless Lesbiam: I bet hawkmoth is feeling tired af

Ladybug: anyway I was wondering if y’all wanted to hop onto a voice chat and we can do homework and talk and stuff

Ladybug: might be nice, plus im gonna be hella bored SUSPENDED

Chat Noir: That sounds like a really nice idea!

Michelangelo: I’m down

16:13

Ladybug has started a Voice Chat

Chat Noir, Michelangelo and Useless Lesbiam have joined

19:28

Michelangelo has left the Voice Chat

21:39

Useless Lesbiam has left the Voice Chat

00:14

Voice Chat has been ended

07:01

Foxy Lad: how come I always miss the good shit

Chapter Text

Group: Lucky Charm

08:15

Foxy Lad: LMAOOOO have u guys checked the Ladyblog yet or no coz u should definitely hit that shit up

Ladybug: subtle

Ladybug: thought you were sick?

Foxy Lad: I was, but I took some magical pills and slept for like a day straight and I superhealed

Foxy Lad: go check the Ladyblog

Chat Noir: What is a ‘Fursona?’

Useless Lesbiam: what a wake up call you guys

Michelangelo: sodifhgrhejkodfhbr

Chat Noir: What’s frustrating?

Foxy Lad: hey im a furry too you guys

Michelangelo: BABE

Foxy Lad: YA

Michelangelo: why didn’t you tell me this sooner

Ladybug: !!!!!PDA!!!!! KEEP IT PG-13 IN HERE

Foxy Lad: eww you were the only one thinking that shit

Michelangelo: yeah Ladybug get your mind out of the gutter

Chat Noir: ?????????

Useless Lesbiam: a furry is a person who is interested in human-like animals

Useless Lesbiam: the ladyblog is hinting to, what the downside to furry-ism is, porn basically

Chat Noir: I still don’t understand.

Foxy Lad: WHY DO YOU WEAR LEATHER AROUND ALL DAY

Chat Noir: I don’t wear it all day, only when I’m Chat Noir.

Chat Noir: And the leather of my suit is surprisingly comfortable.

Ladybug: leave him alone

Ladybug: what about you rena, are you a furry

Foxy Lad: SO WHAT IF I AM

Useless Lesbiam: I would gasp but I am Not Surprised

Foxy Lad: shut up chloe you’re borderline furry

Foxy Lad: we are all basically furries

Ladybug: can we not have this conversation

Foxy Lad: I bet you there’s furry fanfiction of all of us!

Useless Lesbiam: ok I can gasp at that

Chat Noir: I don’t read fanfiction rated over anything over Teenage Audience(s)

Chat Noir: I tried once and it was disgusting, never again

Ladybug: idk I don’t mind it, just not about me

Ladybug: what do you mean it was disgusting, Chat?

Chat Noir: It just kind of made me feel icky

Chat Noir: How do people even do that?

Michelangelo: are we going to ignore that Ladybug just admitted to reading smut

Useless Lesbiam: Chat, what’s your sexuality?

Foxy Lad: uh abrupt much

Chat Noir: I’m bisexual, I think.

Chat Noir: I just kind of like everyone.

Useless Lesbiam: have you ever considered that maybe you’re on the asexual spectrum?

Michelangelo: oh my god everything makes sense I thought you were just hounding him

Chat Noir: What’s the asexual spectrum?

Useless Lesbiam: like, if you aren’t attracted to sex

Useless Lesbiam: or maybe you are, but only if you form a really strong emotional connection with the person

Useless Lesbiam: like could you imagine doing it with Ladybug

Ladybug: oh my god chloe

Chat Noir: I can’t say that!

Useless Lesbiam: ok well then is there someone in your personal life that you could imagine wanting to have sex with

Chat Noir: I think so

Useless Lesbiam: when did you realize you wanted to have sex with them?

Chat Noir: For the girl I’m thinking of, I only realized my attraction when we became close friends. Before, I think she was scared of me or something – every time I spoke to her, she stuttered and ran off.

Useless Lesbiam: interesting

Useless Lesbiam: anyone else got input?

Foxy Lad: there’s this girl I know who’s asexual and she kind of found out about it herself

Foxy Lad: I can ask her a couple questions if you have any??

Ladybug: I know it isn’t always the best idea, but try taking a quiz online?

Ladybug: they helped me

Ladybug: but you don’t ever have to actually put a label on it if you don’t want to

Michelangelo: what about the bisexual thing? I get that if you like calling yourself bi, you’re bi, but it sounds like you’re describing a pan

Chat Noir: Why would I be talking about a kitchen?

Michelangelo: no lmao, pansexual

Michelangelo: you fall in love without taking gender into the equation

Useless Lesbiam: this is where I bow out I’ve always only been attracted to girls

Ladybug: valid girls are hella cute

Ladybug: but im bi!!!

Foxy Lad: yes Ladybug get it me too

Michelangelo: Chat?

Chat Noir: Sorry, I was using google. I’m halfway through a quiz, and I searched up pansexuality.

Chat Noir: To be honest, being pansexual sounds more accurate than bisexual.

Ladybug: !!!!!! Im proud of you Chat

Chat Noir: Thank you, My Lady!

Ladybug: get back to that quiz

Ladybug: y’all who was ur gay awakening

Useless Lesbiam: Keira Knightly, the Pirates of the Caribbean series, aged 6. I remember it so clearly

Foxy Lad: weirdly relatable

Foxy Lad: mine was lowkey kinda late – Brie Larson

Ladybug: Captain Marvel?

Foxy Lad: Room, surprisingly, but after I realized, Captain Marvel was the best movie to watch

Foxy Lad: my first ever girl crush + endless muscles and fight scenes + nineties music = Rena heaven

Useless Lesbiam: I never really looked at Brie Larson like that

Ladybug: hoo I did

Ladybug: Carapace?

Michelangelo: I saw fight club when I was like 11 and I have never gone back

Foxy Lad: oo Brad Pitt?

Michelangelo: baby u know first rule of fight club is we don’t talk about fight club

Michelangelo: (yes)

Useless Lesbiam: what about you, Ladybug?

Ladybug: for me it was a girl I know in my civilian form

Ladybug: I was starstruck for about two weeks, then it faded, now we’re besties

Ladybug: I’d say Cate Blanchett though she was so hot

Foxy Lad: preach sister

Michelangelo: Chat? Are you done?

Chat Noir: It says I’m demi-sexual!

Useless Lesbiam: does that feel like a label that fits?

Chat Noir: I think so!

Ladybug: if you feel weird about it later, nobody can stop you from changing the labels you identify with, it’s your choice

Chat Noir: Thank you guys!!!

Chat Noir: Also, my gay awakening was Adrien Agreste.

Michelangelo: oh please everyone in the entire world is attracted to Adrien Agreste

Useless Lesbiam: everyone attracted to men

Ladybug: when he walks down the street he is doing God’s work

Ladybug: which makes you extra valid!!!!!!!!!!

Chat Noir: Thank you, My Lady.

Ladybug: anytime, Chaton.

Foxy Lad: I love having this convo but my school is about to start and they’re hella strict about phones

Ladybug: oh shit I have to get to school bye!!

Michelangelo: bye y’all

Useless Lesbiam: noo I like being publicly gay let’s continue talking about it

Chapter Text

Group: Lucky Charm

14:07

Michelangelo: Akuma near the Louvre

Ladybug: I know logically we should arrest hawkmoth but I want to kill him

Chat Noir: I’m doing something for my father, but I’ll try and escape!

Foxy Lad: on my way

Foxy Lady: as fast as my old bones permit

Useless Lesbiam: escape?? Chat that’s how I talk about my parents

Useless Lesbiam: you ok?

Chat Noir: Yes!!!!!!!!!

Ladybug: overenthusiasm.

Ladybug: LIES

Chat Noir: No!!!!!! I’m not lying!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Useless Lesbiam: -_-

Chat Noir: Wow, that face is so cool!!!!! I never knew you could do that!!!!!!

Ladybug: stop changing the subject.

Ladybug: we’ll talk about this when the akuma attack is over.

14:51

Ladybug: Is everyone alright?

Foxy Lad: all good

Michelangelo: me too

Useless Lesbiam: I am also pretty good

Useless Lesbiam: do you think group training is a good idea? My muscles were not made for me to be a superhero

Ladybug: maybe we should just do patrol runs to build up stamina

Ladybug: doesn’t the suit give you extra agility

Useless Lesbiam: doesn’t stop me from getting winded

Michelangelo: chat bro we know you’re there

Chat Noir: Sorry!!!!! I didn’t know how to interject into the situation.

Ladybug: bullshit

Foxy Lad: omg ladybug used a bad word

Ladybug: chat, care to share?

Chat Noir: sofjhrjeejdoijf

Chat Noir: It’s awkward just talking about personal stuff.

Ladybug: nobody here is judging you, chat.

Chat Noir: Okay.

Chat Noir: Do you remember whenever we have nightmare akumas, my nightmare is always being barred into my room?

Chat Noir: I just feel trapped in my life, sometimes.

Chat Noir: My mother is out of the picture, so all I really have as family is my father, and my kwami but Plagg doesn’t count – but I never really see him.

Chat Noir: After my mother disappeared, we grew really far apart.

Chat Noir: For a really long time, he didn’t let me go to school, but getting out of the house for something other than what my father has scheduled for me feels really good.

Chat Noir: But he never lets me do extracurricular activities like the other kids my age.

Chat Noir: I don’t know. It’s weird. I’m sorry.

Ladybug: Don’t be sorry!!!!! None of this is your fault, okay?

Chat Noir: You can say that, Ladybug, but you don’t know the full situation.

Ladybug: You’re right. I don’t know the full situation. But I do know that you’re literally the funniest, happiest, most amazing person I know, and paris would be worse off without you.

Ladybug: victim blaming is a big thing, but I know for a fact that your father’s actions are not your fault.

Michelangelo: I have a civilian friend in the same kind of situation

Michelangelo: if you ever need anything that you can’t ask civilian friends for, you have four awesome superhero buddies that would be thrilled to come and chill with you on some rooftop

Foxy Lad: I’d have to bring homework, but that actually sounds really cool

Chat Noir: Thank you guys.

Ladybug: I’m on food detail!!! There’s this bakery I literally love, and if I show up as ladybug they always want to give me free food

Useless Lesbiam: The Dupain-Chengs?

Ladybug: yes!!!!

Useless Lesbiam: I’m coming I want to pay

Ladybug: no it’s fine, they always say it’s the stuff they couldn’t sell

Useless Lesbiam: I can afford it, and there’s this girl in my class that lives there that I can say hi to.

Ladybug: well fine whoever gets there first

Useless Lesbiam: :P

Michelangelo: meet on the Eiffel Tower?

Foxy Lad: sounds good. Ten minutes?

Useless Lesbiam: I can be there in five

Ladybug: I can be there in four!

Useless Lesbiam: you can’t intimidate me I have a girlfriend

Ladybug: what the fuck does having a girlfriend have to do with this

Useless Lesbiam: can’t text im at the damn bakery before you

Chat Noir: Have I told you guys I love you all?

Michelangelo: ofhejkpdfoiguhfrejkldfoij

Foxy Lady: pweoifuhrejkdocviufh

Michelangelo: we love you too, dude

Michelangelo: but in the spirit of rivalry I can so get around Paris faster than you

Chat Noir: You’re a turtle.

Michelangelo: The turtle beat the hare!

Chat Noir: Not the Chat!

Foxy Lad: ok im waiting at the Eiffel tower alone

Ladybug: do your work

Ladybug: queenie and I are wrestling on a rando rooftop for baked goods

Useless Lesbiam: I bought them

Foxy Lad: how the hell are you typing a narration

Ladybug: my incredible skills

Useless Lesbiam: speak to type

Useless Lesbiam: give me the croissants chloe

Useless Lesbiam: sorry

Foxy Lad: whatever see y’all in a bit

Chapter Text

Group: Lucky Charm

05:43

Foxy Lad has renamed the group ‘Ladybug worshippers’

Foxy Lad: all is fixed in the world

Ladybug: what the actual fuck it is too early for this kind of fuckery

Ladybug: why are you up at 5 in the am

Foxy Lad: why are YOU up at 5 in the am

Ladybug: because my fucking phone buzzed

Ladybug: no capital letters please

Ladybug: hurts my brain

08:08

Michelangelo: haha morning you too

Ladybug: fuck you all

Michelangelo: oop someone’s aggressive in the morning

Ladybug: I had homework and responsibilities and I have probably had about three hours of sleep

Foxy Lad: Oof

Useless Lesbiam: Sometimes It Be Like That

Ladybug: I hate all of you

Foxy Lad: probably a good balance considering we’re all in love with u

Michelangelo: you’re like the female Adrien Agreste

Michelangelo: God has placed you on this earth for other people to have their eyes blessed

Ladybug: stop this cult

Michelangelo: No.

Chat Noir: They’re right!!!

Chat Noir: My Lady, you are incredibly beautiful.

Ladybug: Nobody can beat Adrien Agreste.

Foxy Lad: You could top me over Adrien any day

Useless Lesbiam: if I wasn’t in a beautiful committed relationship, me too

Useless Lesbiam: be in a threesome with us

Chat Noir: That’s gross!!! But as I was about to say

Chat Noir: In every fanfiction you’re in, there’s always a really long setting paragraph describing your beautiful hair and eyes.

Chat Noir: There’s quite a discourse in the fandom over which colour your eyes are.

Ladybug: blue

Chat Noir: Cerulean, sky, or teal?

Useless Lesbiam: cerulean any day

Michelangelo: excuse you her eyes are the colour of the fucking sky

Chat Noir: You see?

Ladybug: I am unsettled that there is fanfic about me

Chat Noir: I read some of it! It’s funny.

Chat Noir: And I like to pretend I’m a famous youtuber doing a reaction video.

Foxy Lad: I read my fair share of Ladynoir before I became Rena

Foxy Lad: if one of my bros recommends me one now, I’d still tap on it

Foxy Lad: people are talented

Ladybug: haven’t we had this conversation?

Michelangelo: not in the context of not-smut

Michelangelo: I’ve been shipped with Chat, Ladybug and Rena

Chat Noir: I think I’ve been paired with all of you!!! My Lady the most, though.

Ladybug: For me it’s the same.

Ladybug: I think most of the fan works are Lady Noir centric.

Foxy Lad: because y’all are a divine pairing

Useless Lesbiam: sodfjhejkodfij was that a cloak and dagger reference

Foxy Lad: ofhrenkfoihrbe yes queenie I didn’t know you were into marvel

Useless Lesbiam: When I’m not browsing the Ladybug x Queen Bee tag, I tend to dip into the Natasha Romanoff x Reader

Useless Lesbian: there’s a fair share of fics where we meet the avengers actually

Useless Lesbiam: Ladybug and Captain America get on great apparently

Ladybug: I’ve had a crush on Steve Rogers since 1944

Chat Noir: ?????

Ladybug: Hot Damn.

Michelangelo: you can say that again

Foxy Lad: But queenie – Wanda? She’s so sweet

Useless Lesbiam: Nat owns my heart literally leave me alone

Michelangelo: let’s go back to talking about stuff I can relate to

Michelangelo: Chat, you want to start a youtube channel???

Chat Noir: I don’t think it would ever happen, but doesn’t everyone think about it?

Chat Noir: I just think, in my superhero form, it would be fun to find ways to interact with our fans.

Chat Noir: The only information most of them have about us is from that cartoon movie.

Useless Lesbiam: woah most of them

Useless Lesbiam: chat who you been flirting with

Chat Noir: I have not been flirting with anybody.

Chat Noir: Don’t you guys have civilian friends that you visit in your suits?

Ladybug: no

Foxy Lad: no

Michelangelo: nope

Useless Lesbiam: no but everyone knows who I am so it’d be pointless

Ladybug: tell us more

Ladybug: but keep it impersonal. No names

Chat Noir: There’s this girl that I talked to a couple of times in akuma attacks. We were kind of acquaintances, but one time I was patrolling and she was on her balcony, and she waved, and I waved back. It kind of became a tradition, until one day about a year and a half ago, she invited me into her room for cookies. We’ve been friends ever since.

Foxy Lad: sounds like more than just friends

Chat Noir: We’re just friends!!!!!!!

Michelangelo: how often do you hang out with balcony girl?

Chat Noir: A few times a week? It used to be whenever I patrolled, but then I started going out just to see her, and then patrols got cut down so now I go to her whenever I want to see her, really.

Useless Lesbiam: friends.

Chat Noir: We’re just friends!!!!

Ladybug: shut up you guys

Ladybug: are you staying safe when you visit her? Not letting anyone see?

Chat Noir: Of course. I don’t want to put her at risk.

Foxy Lad: this is literally so cute

Foxy Lad: this could be a romance novel

Foxy Lad: do you guys have nicknames for each other?

Chat Noir: She calls me ‘kitty’ (for obvious reasons), and I call her Princess, because it’s easy to make puns with and she literally lives in the tower part of her house. And she has a balcony.

Michelangelo: well next time you see balcony girl say hi from me

Chat Noir: The other week, she knitted me a sweater because it’s getting cold!!! If you want, I can ask her to knit you guys some.

Useless Lesbiam: I already have a designer friend that can knit queen bee clothes if I so desire them

Foxy Lad: that is literally so cute

Michelangelo: your friends don’t just knit you sweaters, chat

Ladybug: odughfehwjkdofgiufhre

Chat Noir: My Lady, you summed it up perfectly!

Chat Noir: We are just friends!!!

Foxy Lad: whatever you say…

Chapter Text

Group: Ladybug worshippers

16:01

Foxy Lad: yo chat

Foxy Lad: I was thinking about what you said

Foxy Lad: doesn’t the ladyblog girl have a youtube?

Foxy Lad: ask her to help film, and start one of your own

Foxy Lad: updates would probably be hella patchy but I’m sure the public would love a vlog of a group patrol

Foxy Lad: right?

Chat Noir: Oh, I was kind of joking.

Chat Noir: I’m really busy in my civilian form. I don’t know if I’d have enough time to make constant videos as Chat Noir>

Ladybug: Plus the internet is buzzing enough with trying to figure out our identities. What if someone uses facial recognition software?

Foxy Lad: nah they’ve already tried that with photos, your magic mask prohibits that

Foxy Lad: and… updates don’t have to be regular? Sherlock came out 3 episodes a year or something and people still loved that shit

Ladybug: well yeah it’s benedict Cumberbatch

Foxy Lad: off topic but also yes

Foxy Lad: why don’t you contact her?

Chat Noir: What do I say?

Foxy Lad: ‘hello Ladyblog owner. I was speaking to your friend, Rena Rouge, the best superhero, about starting a youtube channel – but I don’t believe I have enough time to post day-to-day videos. For this reason, could it be a once-in-a-while feature of your blog for the superhero team to post videos? Thank you.’

Ladybug: other than the obviously unnecessary parts, that was pretty well crafted

Foxy Lad: thank u I do try my best

Michelangelo: she wants to be a journalist

Chat Noir: That’s so cool! I have a civilian friend that wants to be a journalist, too. She’s super driven and hard working.

Ladybug: verging into dangerous territory here

Ladybug: also has anyone seen @Useless Lesbiam she’s usually hella active

Useless Lesbiam: stfu im on a date

Michelangelo: lmao that explains it

Foxy Lad: do u remember when we made this group and we were all in love with Ladybug but now we can safely tell her to fuck off

Ladybug: I wouldn’t

Ladybug: I have the power of god and anime on my side

Michelangelo: rip vine my soul

Chat Noir: Speak for yourself, pure souls don’t swear, and I’m still in love with you, My Lady

Ladybug: borderline creepy

Foxy Lad: fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fck fuck fuck fuck fcuk

Foxy Lad: who’s holy now

Michelangelo: still not you

Chat Noir: Also, what’s vine?

Ladybug: pdofgiubhgfeiowpdkfv oh my god no

Foxy Lad: he’s a baby

Chat Noir: Don’t judge me, that’s mean

Michelangelo: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dQw4w9WgXcQ

Michelangelo: idk if im ashamed or if this should really have been expected

Ladybug: spdofewjkd I love vine

Foxy Lad: if chat doesn’t get a youtube we should defo get a tiktok

Foxy Lad: I hear there are a bunch of memes about us on there

Michelangelo: sldkjfhhewjodj stop

Foxy Lad: don’t you mean sksksksksksksk

Ladybug: Rena’s going to show up to the next patrol with her hydroflask

Foxy Lad: says you, you literally wear pigtails

Foxy Lad: I bet you own like 100 scrunchies

Ladybug: so what if I do

Michelangelo: im fully for the save the turtles movement

Michelangelo: maybe we’re all secret vsco girls

Foxy Lad: lmao

Chat Noir: I understand nothing.

Chat Noir: Those videos were funny, though!

Chat Noir: And a lot of what my civilian friends say now makes sense

Foxy Lad: ok now let’s move on because this was a weird conversation

Michelangelo: can we make a new rule?

Michelangelo: anything chat doesn’t know, he has to google

Michelangelo: first it was keysmashing, then it was vines? What comes next

Foxy Lad: whwre do we draw the line

Ladybug: whwre

Michelangelo: whwre

Useless Lesbiam: whwre

Foxy Lad: you’re supposed to be on a date fuck off

Useless Lesbiam: I just walked her home so fuck off yourself

Useless Lesbiam: what’s up the rest of y’all I am in a very good mood

Useless Lesbiam: and I had an idea

Useless Lesbiam: we should so do group movie nights

Useless Lesbiam: have any of u guys got a laptop?

Michelangelo: you don’t?

Useless Lesbiam: I literally live in a hotel room

Foxy Lad: that changes nothing????

Useless Lesbiam: anyway you guys should all come over and we can watch some Disney or some shit

Useless Lesbiam: my favourite movie is la la land so if we want to start with that

Ladybug: wlekfhej I love la la land

Useless Lesbiam: I KNOW RIGHT IT WAS SO GOOD

Useless Lesbiam: but yeah if you guys have any movie recs

Michelangelo: kill bill vol. 1

Foxy Lad: back to the future

Ladybug: eww you nerd

Chat Noir: Empire Strikes Back

Ladybug: EWW YOU NERD

Ladybug: kidding I love star wars

Useless Lesbiam: what about you ladybug

Ladybug: I never got the chance to watch the animated ladybug and chat noir movie…

Michelangelo: OO DID U GUYS HEAR

Michelangelo: THEY MADE AN ANIME ABOUT US

Foxy Lad: WHATTT

Ladybug: my inner 12 year old is quaking

Michelangelo: ladybug is Brigitte and felix is chat noir

Michelangelo: I’ve actually been following season 1 pretty closely and it’s good

Michelangelo: it says that you two know each other in real life though

Michelangelo: the relationships are WILD

Michelangelo: very entertaining

Useless Lesbiam: I’ll write it down if you all start heading my way now

Ladybug: I’m bringing work but also omw

Chat Noir: I’ll be there!!!

Foxy Lad: we better watch back to the future

Michelangelo: wait im confused do we still need my laptop

Chapter Text

Group: Ladybug worshippers

19:48

Ladybug: hey again y’all

Ladybug: I know I saw all of you yesterday

Ladybug: but does anyone just want to voice chat about stuff?

Ladybug: I need to sew so my machine will be loud

Ladybug: but I could use someone to talk to

Foxy Lad: what’s up?

Ladybug: is it okay if I call you? I don’t really want it to be permanent on the chat

Foxy Lad has started a Voice Chat

Ladybug has joined

20:23

Chat Noir: I was out. Is everything okay?

Foxy Lad: join vc

Chat Noir has joined the Voice Chat

20:35

Useless Lesbiam has joined the Voice Chat

22:01

Voice Chat has been ended

Private Messages - @Ladybug @Chat Noir

Chat Noir: Hey, My Lady. Are you okay?

Ladybug: I feel kind of better now. Thank you.

Chat Noir: I know I didn’t hear the whole story, but if you want another ear, I’m always hear. (Haha, get it?

Ladybug: very funny, Chat.

Ladybug: I’m just really tired of everything. I am very stressed.

Ladybug: this is our last year of school and the cat’s out of the bag that I do fashion in my civilian form and that requires hours upon hours and I also have to be ladybug

Ladybug: im constantly worried about hawkmoth and I run on maybe three hours of sleep a day and im just really scared im going to burn out

Chat Noir: In my experience, when you feel it all coming to a head like you did today, that is your burnout.

Ladybug: ugh don’t remind me

Ladybug: I’m embarrassed enough that I invited y’all on a voice chat and just cried for like an hour

Chat Noir: When you used the sewing machine, we couldn’t hear you.

Ladybug: wow I feel so much better

Chat Noir: Sorry. But it’s okay to cry. We’ve all had this, and we will in the future

Chat Noir: And who better to have a breakdown with than a bunch of superheroes?

Ladybug: wait did you hear the part about that bitch in my school though

Ladybug: because I am still pissed at her

Ladybug: if I tell you I can still get like 8 hours of sleep

Chat Noir: Spill the tea

Ladybug: wtf where did you learn that

Chat Noir: queenie and then google

Ladybug: ya ok so you remember that bitch that got me suspended

Ladybug: Her name is L for Lying bitch

Ladybug: today she embarrassed me in front of my entire class

Ladybug: unfortunately, I am not a very punctual person. I blame it on literal sleep deprivation.

Ladybug: but today I tripped trying to come in through the school canteen

Ladybug: and L decided that she’d pour her entire lunch over me

Ladybug: like literally pour it over my head

Ladybug: and then start apologising, but claiming it was all my fault because me slamming into her triggered her arthritis and it was too painful to hold her breakfast tray

Ladybug: I was covered in orange juice and porridge, freezing, in front of almost everyone I know – and then the principal started yelling at me for being a klutz, and always being late

Ladybug: god, chat, I feel like shit

Ladybug: I had to wear lost property clothes all day and my hair still smells like porridge

Chat Noir: I’m really sorry, My Lady.

Chat Noir: If I went to your school, I’d give that girl a piece of my mind.

Chat Noir: And a piece of Chat Noir’s mind.

Chat Noir: There’s actually a similar situation at the school I go to, but I’m always out on business for my father, so I can’t help my friend.

Ladybug: please tell me your friend isn’t the lying bitch

Chat Noir: No!!!!!! Of course not.

Chat Noir: A chat can always see through a façade, My Lady.

Ladybug: good

Ladybug: im glad somewhere in this world there is some good

Ladybug: you’re too good to me, you know that?

Chat Noir: I just want you to be happy.

Chat Noir: I also want you to experience 8 hours of sleep in one go.

Ladybug: impossible

Chat Noir: Go!!!!!

Ladybug: Thank you, chat.

Chat Noir: Any time.

Ladybug: next time we’re unloading all your shit so you can feel better too

Ladybug: you know I love you right

Chat Noir: I love you too, My Lady.

Chat Noir: Now go to sleep!

Chapter Text

Group: Ladybug worshippers

17:12

Chat Noir: Hello everyone!!!!!

Chat Noir: How are you all?

Foxy Lad: tired and suspicious

Chat Noir: Why???

Foxy Lad: your punctuation, and you never ever start convos

Chat Noir: I noticed that too!!! So I started this one!

Michelangelo: yo chat

Chat Noir: Carapace!!! How are you???

Michelangelo: great nobody’s ever greeted me with that much enthusiasm

Foxy Lad: aww poor baby :/

Michelangelo: you’ve been dating me for like 3 years you’re supposed to comfort me

Useless Lesbiam: what is up hoe’s my girlfriend is busy so now I am chatting with y’all

Useless Lesbiam: has anyone seen LB

Chat Noir: No!!!!!! Maybe she’s busy?????

Foxy Lad: she’s on patrol it’s her slot y’all know this

Chat Noir: Oh!

Chat Noir: Well, actually, I was thinking…

Chat Noir: What do you guys think of this whole secret identity thing?

Chat Noir: I mean, Rena and Carapace know each other, we all know Queenie, and LB knows all of us, except me.

Chat Noir: Shouldn’t we just reveal ourselves?

Foxy Lad: lmao my suspicions were right

Michelangelo: idk I kind of get the danger in it

Useless Lesbiam: I mean I’ve known all your identities for a while and I haven’t spilled

Foxy Lad: wait what

Useless Lesbiam: yeah, I know all of you

Chat Noir: Even LB???

Useless Lesbiam: Even LB.

Foxy Lad: hot damn

Ladybug: oh good you’re all on

Ladybug: akuma outside the palace of Versailles

Ladybug: we’ll talk about identity stuff later

Foxy Lad: oop someone’s in trouble

Michelangelo: is nobody going to appreciate that this is the first time something’s actually happened on a patrol

Ladybug: literally hurry up

Chat Noir: On my way!!!

18:21

Ladybug: that was a long one

Ladybug: is everyone good?

Foxy Lad: yee

Michelangelo: queenie have you ever thought about taking up basketball or something that was one hell of a shot

Useless Lesbiam: I do rugby as a civilian and the superpowers kind of help??? Plus I was throwing to LB and she’s hella lucky anyway

Ladybug: nu uh stop changing the subject we have serious stuff to talk about

Foxy Lad: because ‘nu uh’ is so serious

Ladybug: I’ve already warned you guys, identity stuff is dangerous

Ladybug: queenie, how did you find out

Useless Lesbiam: if I tell you, everyone else will realize

Ladybug: and you’re sure I am who you think I am?

Useless Lesbiam: okay

Useless Lesbiam: but I really don’t get why we can’t share identities

Ladybug: it is really dangerous

Ladybug: I’m not saying I don’t trust you guys – I trust each and every one of you ten times over – but whilst hawkmoth is still a threat, identities is just another thing for him to target

Ladybug: what if one of us is captured, and forced to give out the other’s identities

Foxy Lad: then again, in movies, even if you deny knowing everything, they still torture you because they think you’re lying

Ladybug: not the point

Ladybug: as soon as one of our civilian identities gets out, whoever is seen with that person is immediately in danger

Ladybug: their family is in danger

Ladybug: and quite frankly, I think all of us have got a lot to lose

Ladybug: I don’t want hawkmoth having something else to use as leverage

Chat Noir: Ok. I respect that, My Lady. When you put it like that it makes sense. I’m sorry.

Ladybug: no it’s ok!!! It was a valid question

Ladybug: I’m probably in the wrong for not explaining it sooner

Ladybug: I feel like I’ve brought the mood down

Ladybug: how about after hawkmoth’s defeat we meet up and reveal our identities

Ladybug: at some café or something

Foxy Lad: that is actually a really good idea

Michelangelo: I’d like that

Chat Noir: Me too.

Ladybug: good!!! I look forwards to it.

Ladybug: now all of you should go do some homework and get in a decent night’s sleep, we din’t know when the next akuma attack will be

Chat Noir: Yes ma’am!

Ladybug: eww I’m 17 not 40

Foxy Lad: (a baby)

Chat Noir: Bye everyone!!!!!

Private Messages - @Queen Bee @Chat Noir

Queen Bee: you know don’t you

Chat Noir: Know what?

Queen Bee: Ladybug’s identity

Chat Noir: No!!!! What would make you think that.

Queen Bee: she’s Marinette Dupain-Cheng

Chat Noir: OMG why would you tell me that!!!!!!!

Queen Bee: To let you know you were right

Chat Noir: Ugh, fine.

Chat Noir: I know.

Queen Bee: How did you finally figure it out?

Chat Noir: She was telling me all about her school bully (Lila) and I went into school the next morning, and Nino told me everything. Exactly like Ladybug had said it happened.

Queen Bee: Wow. Really thought she’d be more careful

Queen Bee: oh well

Queen Bee: Adrien agreste

Chat Noir: who’s Adrien agreste??????

Queen Bee: too oblivious to work

Queen Bee: god you’re all as thick as each other

Chat Noir: How did you figure it out?

Queen Bee: I had my suspicions, but the moment you said Adrien Agreste was your gay awakening, I knew.

Chat Noir: It was funny in hindsight though, wasn’t it.

Queen Bee: Not the point.

Queen Bee: You shouldn’t tell Marinette you know she’s Ladybug.

Chat Noir: What? Why not?

Queen Bee: it’ll distract her. She needs time to focus on her superhero duties. You can get together after we defeat hawkmoth

Chat Noir: well it’s probably going to be a while before we defeat hawkmoth!!!!!!!!!!

Queen Bee: I wouldn’t be so sure. Attacks are becoming more frequent, there have been more hawkmoth sightings…

Queen Bee: it all leads to a big head-to-head

Queen Bee: us five versus him

Chat Noir: How do I act natural around Marinette?

Queen Bee: as long as you don’t flirt you’re completely normal

Chat Noir: What’s that supposed to mean?

Queen Bee: I like being cryptic. Maybe you’ll never know

Queen Bee: see you at school tomorrow, Adrien.

Chat Noir: Yeah, you too.

Chat Noir: Chloe?

Queen Bee: yeah

Chat Noir: I’m really glad it was you who got to be Queen Bee

Queen Bee: blergh affection

Queen Bee: you make a half decent Chat Noir, I guess

Chapter Text

Group: Ladybug worshippers

11:12

Foxy Lad: Hawkmoth sighting on the Eiffel tower

Michelangelo: wait really? He never comes out in person

Ladybug: I’ll go check it out, let you know if it’s legit

Useless Lesbiam: lmao this is how all the fanfictions end

Foxy Lad: if we’re in a fanfic, everything will go perfectly fine

Foxy Lad: or someone’s going to die and it’s going to be tragic, but whatever

Michelangelo: way to lighten the mood

Chat Noir: I’m with LB. It’s real. Hawkmoth is here.

Foxy Lad: well, shit

Michelangelo: I’m on my way

Useless Lesbiam: eta like 2 minutes

Ladybug: I don’t see an akuma

Ladybug: wait – y’all remember Volphina

Useless Lesbiam: yeah

Foxy Lad: that bitch

Ladybug: be prepared for anything

13:04

Ladybug: is everyone safe, at home?

Foxy Lad: yeah

Michelangelo: yeah

Ladybug: good. I’m glad.

Ladybug: I need to take the peacock miraculous to Master Fu and get it fixed for whatever curse is on it, but you should all rest for a couple days.

Michelangelo: is anyone else still in shock?

Foxy Lad: yeah, I think so

Ladybug: I mean, we had our theories about Hawkmoth being Gabriel Agreste, but we wrote it off when he himself got akumatised

Useless Lesbiam: I’m really sorry I let him get away

Ladybug: No!!! You tried your best. How were you supposed to know Volphina would attack at that exact moment?

Useless Lesbiam: still…

Michelangelo: I feel really bad for Adrien agreste

Michelangelo: his dad’s the only family he had, right?

Foxy Lad: I didn’t realize the entire fight was being broadcast on live television…

Ladybug: it’s unfortunate, but there’s nothing we can do right now.

Ladybug: recharge, all of you. We should talk about plans to take him down

Useless Lesbiam: be as it might, I really don’t think we should go to his home. It’d be another blow on Adrien, and he probably has some secret base that would mean he’s at an advantage if we go there

Foxy Lad: so we lay low, and wait for him to prepare?

Michelangelo: that doesn’t sound very good

Ladybug: you say that, but he knows that we know, and all of Paris, so he’ll be paranoid

Ladybug: Like when there hasn’t been an akuma attack for a couple days. We all get really scared, don’t we?

Foxy Lad: that makes sense

Useless Lesbiam: ok, so we wait

Foxy Lad: best case scenario, we fight and get his miraculous, too

Foxy Lad: worst situation, he unmasks all of us and kills us or something, and then uses our deaths to do whatever he wants with the Ladybug and Chat Noir miraculous

Ladybug: It won’t get that far, Rena.

Ladybug: we’ve been waiting to fight him face-to-face for 4 years

Ladybug: we’ve beaten all the akumas he’s sent our way

Ladybug: we’re ready for him.

Useless Lesbiam: I trust you, Ladybug.

Ladybug: thank you.

Ladybug: now I really have to go to Master Fu – bug out!

Michelangelo: ugh cringe

Foxy Lad: hey don’t speak in that tone

Foxy Lad: she’s probably trying to make the most use out of that phrase before we annihilate Hawkmoth

Useless Lesbiam: someone’s suddenly very positive

Foxy Lad: I want a phrase, too

Foxy Lad: help

Michelangelo: Turtle-y awesome! Is mine

Useless Lesbiam: we know, you made it your name way back in the day

Foxy Lad: according to comparison between now and when the gc started, I’m the most boring! My name has barely changed

Foxy Lad: : (((((((((((((((

Useless Lesbiam: if I had one, it would have to be cool, but none of them are col, which is why I don’t have one

Foxy Lad: literal bull

Foxy Lad: you’re as uncreative as me

Useless Lesbiam: rude

Useless Lesbiam: bees have so many more phrases than foxes

Useless Lesbiam: we have honey, and pollen, and flowers, and beehives…

Useless Lesbiam: what do you have? Chickens

Foxy Lad: ok, rude

Foxy Lad: foxes are naturally friendly and curious

Michelangelo: all this fox talk is confusing me

Michelangelo: whilst this conversation was turtle-y awesome, I’m gonna head out!

Foxy Lad: that one just doesn’t have that ring to it, does it?

Useless Lesbiam: bees are also very friendly and sweet

Useless Lesbiam: and we make honey, which everyone loves

Foxy Lad: yeah whatever

Foxy Lad: im tired

Foxy Lad: im going to sleep

Foxy Lad: (insert fiture catchphrase here)

Foxy Lad: bye

Useless Lesbiam: uh ok now im alone

Private Messages - @Queen Bee @Chat Noir

Queen Bee: Adrien?

Queen Bee: are you okay?

Queen Bee: I’m really sorry about what happened

Queen Bee: I shouldn’t have let him go

Queen Bee: I’m really sorry, he’s your father, Adrien

Queen Bee: if you don’t want to respond, it’s fine

Queen Bee: but I just want you to know that if you ever want a friend to lend an ear or a shoulder, I’ll always be here for you

Queen Bee: I’m really sorry.

Chapter Text

Private Messages - @Ladybug @Chat Noir

04:11

Ladybug: Chat?

Ladybug: it’s been a week.

Ladybug: I don’t even know if you’re reading these messages

Ladybug: I want to know what we did

Ladybug: what I did

Ladybug: I want to help

Ladybug: I miss you, Chat. A lot.

Ladybug: I don’t know if you’re like the rest of us, but I haven’t been getting much sleep recently.

Ladybug: I haven’t really been going into school, either

Ladybug: I guess my parents think my looking like crap is because I have a stomach bug, haha

Ladybug: I’m really worried Hawkmoth will strike

Ladybug: we could take him down, you know. We know who he is

Ladybug: but not without you, Chat. We need you.

Ladybug: I need you.

Ladybug: but I get that you’re going through something, and that’s ok. I hope when you feel better, you can talk to me about it.

Ladybug: I love you, chat

Ladybug: and I really hope to hear from you soon

Group: Ladybug worshippers

09:03

Foxy Lad: Hi everyone

Foxy Lad: daily check in time

Michelangelo: all good

Useless Lesbiam: great, all things considered, from my end

Ladybug: I’m here

Foxy Lad: no sign of Chat?

Ladybug: I’ve been out for hours every night

Ladybug: if he came out, I would know

Michelangelo: it’s not like him to stay home

Michelangelo: wasn’t he talking about how he felt so trapped from his house?

Useless Lesbiam: maybe you guys just don’t understand

Ladybug: and you do?

Useless Lesbiam: I know his identity. Whilst I don’t agree with the silence thing, I understand

Useless Lesbiam: he hasn’t been online in a week

Ladybug: believe me, I know

Ladybug: are you all getting on with civilian lives

Foxy Lad: the hawkmoth reveal really shook everyone up from my perspective

Foxy Lad: my best friend isn’t coming in to school, and one of my friends, Adrien Agreste, hasn’t been seen since the reveal

Michelangelo: do you think he’s in danger?

Michelangelo: from what I know about Adrien Agreste, he doesn’t have anywhere he can go away from his father

Foxy Lad: he’s living with his father’s ex-secretary apparently

Foxy Lad: my teacher said it one morning when you weren’t in – gave it as an excuse as to why he wasn’t in

Foxy Lad: she lives half the way across Paris

Ladybug: everything is just kind of really messed up right now

Ladybug: but we should continue living as normally as possible

Ladybug: we should be completely ready for when he, or we, decide to strike

Useless Lesbiam: weren’t we going to strike first?

Ladybug: Gabriel Agreste is a rich man

Ladybug: I doubt his evil lair is in his mansion – and if it is, we’d be going onto his territory

Foxy Lad: Déjà vu

Ladybug: what, have we had this conversation?

Foxy Lad: ye

Ladybug: oh, sorry

Ladybug: to be perfectly honest, i’m kind of a hypocrite

Ladybug: I can’t really sleep

Ladybug: I’m worried about everything

Ladybug: will we win against hawkmoth?

Ladybug: if we do, then what?

Foxy Lad: we’ll be able to keep our miraculous, right?

Ladybug: I don’t know

Ladybug: I think so, but there’d be no point unless some other supervillain came out

Ladybug: and haven’t you heard reports? Us being superheroes has brought up crime rates rather than down

Ladybug: it’s like we’re coaxing all the bad guys out of their hidey holes

Ladybug: maybe it would just be better if we resigned

Useless Lesbiam: literally stop

Useless Lesbiam: if crime rate is increasing it’s our job to kick ass and get it back down again

Useless Lesbiam: it’s not our fault bad people are bad

Useless Lesbiam: our miraculouses are literally the best things that ever happened to us

Useless Lesbiam: I wouldn’t give mine up for the world

Foxy Lad: and we will so defeat hawkmoth

Foxy Lad: now that shock has worn off, it’s 5 against 1

Michelangelo: 4 against 1

Ladybug: I’m not doing this without Chat

Ladybug: I know you guys may not understand

Ladybug: but at the beginning, I had a really hard time doing this job

Ladybug: chat was my only partner for a long time

Ladybug: he was the only person that could properly stand by me

Ladybug: and he did

Ladybug: now it’s my turn

Foxy Lad: I know that was a serious speech and all but this is so cute

Foxy Lad: Ladynoir for life

Michelangelo: babe

Foxy Lad: babe

Michelangelo: not right now

Useless Lesbiam: uuh says you nobody wants to see the pda right now

Foxy Lad: it was literally two words

Useless Lesbiam: yeah, whatever

Useless Lesbiam: it’s blergh but it doesn’t kill me

Ladybug: just because you got a girlfriend…

Useless Lesbiam: tf is that supposed to mean

Michelangelo: miss ‘I hate PDA’ is suddenly very lenient…

Useless Lesbiam: shut up

Foxy Lad: y’all check the Ladyblog

Foxy Lad: Hawkmoth sighting

Foxy Lad: @Ladybug @Chat Noir @Useless Lesbiam @Michelangelo

Michelangelo: well shit

Ladybug: chat?

Chat Noir: On my way.

Ladybug: wait chat

Ladybug: are you okay?

Ladybug: where have you been

Michelangelo: we all want to know, but not right now

Useless Lesbiam: we have a job to do

Chapter Text

Adrien couldn’t remember when the last time he’d seen the sun was. A week ago, maybe? Two? In a cooped up, dark room, it was hard to tell what time had passed.

He’d stopped counting meals when Nathalie had stopped bringing them in at regular intervals. She was suffering, too, he imagined – she was in love with Emilie, after all. To find out the one person you’d trust with your love was keeping her in a coma, and was actually a supervillain… he was sure she had it almost as bad as he did.

Surprising as it was, he didn’t think much. People spent years figuring out how to clear their minds, and yet his felt like one blank, empty slate. He ate when food was given to him. He drank when water was given to him. He remained curled up in bed, drifting in-between sleep and staring at the dark walls around him.

He didn’t know Nathalie lived half the way across Paris – he’d always assumed she didn’t have an apartment. She did live with them through the week, after all. But she’d seen the entire thing on live television, and ran to him – catching him in his suit – and asked no questions, merely asking the Gorilla to take them both to some unknown location.

She knew he was Chat Noir, then. It was kind of funny – the first person, the only person, he thought would have that information would be Ladybug.

When he did think, he went over the events of the fight. They’d had Hawkmoth; although his power didn’t leave him five minutes, there was a time limit – and he’d reached his and detransformed in Chloe’s arms.

She’d let him go. Adrien was trying his best not to blame her – shock makes you do strange things – but what else could he think about?

His father’s reputation, he imagined, was completely ruined. Good.

“Adrien?” Nathalie’s voice filtered through the cracks in the door as she pushed it open. It was the first time he’d heard her in days – after she’d stopped announcing she was bringing him food. Her voice was hoarse – like he suspected his would be if he tried to speak. Maybe she’d been crying, or maybe she’d been dealing with it the only way she knew how – through trying to work everything out by literally burying herself in work.

In recognition, he turned his head to face her, squinting at the light that filtered through the now open doorway.

“You have a text message.”

Adrien’s eyebrows drew together. He’d suspected he’d been getting text messages – but why was this one important?

“It’s…” Nathalie’s voice faltered, and she cleared her throat. “It’s about your… about Hawkmoth. He’s been sighted. Your superhero friends need you.”

Adrien sat up in the bed, and a bout of dizziness hit him. Of course. Sudden rush of blood after literally not standing for a week.

“Pass it to me,” he demanded, not caring that his voice was as callous as he felt. Nathalie obeyed, retreating back to the doorway afterwards, like an uncharacteristically timid mouse.

His eyes scanned over the notifications – about 100 from Chloe and Carapace, a good forty or so from Rena, and endless messages from Ladybug – from Marinette. Something akin to guilt but not quite there yet hit his chest, and he grimaced.

He really needed a shower. He could feel the dirt like a second skin all over him.

“Plagg?” He asked, and his voice was deeper than he remembered – like how it sounded first thing in the morning when he had a cold.

The kwami had been sleeping by him the entire time, and, in true kwami-fashion, had probably been absorbing some of his grief. “Yeah, kid?”

“We have to be Chat Noir.” He stood on shaky legs. When was the last time he ate?

“Are you ready for that? Physically?”

Adrien let out a long sigh. “I guess I have to be, don’t I?”

He made eye contact with Nathalie, who nodded softly and closed the door again with a soft click. Once again, he was enveloped in darkness – except, now his eyes needed to readjust, so the only thing he could make out was Plagg’s glowing eyes, and his hovering figure.

“Claws out.” He said, and within seconds, he was his alter-ego. As Chat Noir, generally, everything just felt better. His eyesight improved – he felt like he could breathe larger breaths, and stand taller, and walk for longer (if he had to.) But right now, that all kind of faded away into a soft numbness in the back of his brain. An icy-cold lump in his chest, right where his heart would be.

He turned on his phone again, sending a short ‘On my way.’ Then he shut it off, ignoring it as it lit up with more and more messages.

He had a job to do. A villain to defeat.

Adrien arrived on the Eiffel Tower to see a group of four tired-looking, shocked superheroes. He didn’t know how he knew they were tired – their eyes were covered with magical masks – but Chloe’s skin had turned an almost-grey, and the others weren’t seeming to be holding it together much, either.

“Chat,” Ladybug started, reaching out an arm and placing her hand on his shoulder. Her hand was warm, and, despite everything in him, comforting. He braced himself for what she’d ask. “Are you okay?”

He let out a humourless laugh. “Physically or mentally?”

“Both,” she said, and it was like everything in her voice was soft, and kind. Like a blanket.

“I’ll manage. I can fight.”

She let her hand slip until it was grasping his, and she squeezed it once, tightly. It was something they’d grown akin to doing whenever a quick burst of strength, or reassurance, was needed. He squeezed back – and a certain joy behind her eyes made itself known.

“Okay,” she said, turning back into leader mode and facing the rest of the group. Her hand didn’t leave his. “We need a game plan.”

“Illusions?” Rena offered.

“Too obvious.” Ladybug countered. “This is our shot. As hard as it would be for a normal civilian, if Gabriel Agreste wanted, he has the money, and probably the contacts, to escape the country. We need justice. We need to beat him. We can’t do something we’ve used before.”

“Let’s surprise him,” Carapace said. “Like, a half-half approach.”

“He’s expecting us. It wouldn’t work.”

“How about we just go for it?” Queenie offered. “We’ve never been a better team. I know how all of you work. We know each other’s dynamics. We should all just aim for the brooch on his chest.”

“Could we even break it?” Rena asked. “We’ve never had to break a miraculous before.”

“No harm in trying. Break it, or get it off of him and detransform him. Whatever you can. My Miraculous can probably fix it.”

“Okay,” said Carapace. “Then let’s go.”

Ladybug let out a short breath. If anyone had a knife, they could use it to cut through the nervous energy between the five. This was it. The big, fine battle, and all.

“I really look forwards to our identity reveal in a café in a couple of days,” Ladybug said with a small smile. Carapace went to respond, but Rena hit him in the bicep.

“Me too, considering I know all of you.” Queenie smirked. “It’ll be like some movie. I should bring popcorn.”

“Don’t you mean some fanfic?” Ladybug teased. Nobody laughed, but it brought smiles to everyone’s faces – and right now, that was enough.

Marinette squeezed his hand again. He felt it in his heart. “Okay,” she said. “Steel yourselves. We have a jerk to arrest.”

If you asked Chat Noir to tell you what had happened so far in the fight against Hawkmoth, his response would be patchy, at best.

He remembered the beginning – hell, all of Paris would remember the beginning. It was the easy part, per se. The part where Ladybug gives a big speech about justice and how Hawkmoth’s reign of terror has finally come to an end. Or something like that. It’s probably on the Ladyblog.

He remembered that Hawkmoth had come prepared – there were butterflies everywhere, and akumas, too. He remembers hand-to-hand combat. He remembers exchanging brief words with his teammates. He remembers everyone going off to recharge, again, and again, and again.

Somehow, he and Ladybug ended up in the same alleyway. Her earrings had a minute left – his ring about the same.

“Chat,” she said, turning around as was standard so they didn’t reveal their identities. It was… ironic at best, considering he knew hers already. “Are you sure you’re okay?”

“I can’t tell you,” he responded – words coming out more cryptic than intended. “But I can show you.”

She turned around to look at him. “What do you…”

His transformation flashed, and she let out a small ‘eep’, hands flying to cover her eyes. “What the hell, Chat?”

“I…” he paused. He’d been thinking about how his identity reveal would go. He’d read enough about how it could happen – an accident, or a planned occurrence. He didn’t expect to know who she was.

“I know your identity, My Lady. And I want you to know mine.”

“Chat…” Ladybug’s voice held its normal tone of warning, but there was worry underlying – from the ongoing fight several blocks away, or the information he’d just given her, he couldn’t tell. “Now is really not a good time.”

“But it is,” he insisted. “Now is the only time. Marinette.”

She let her hand drop in surprise, but her transformation shone before she could get a good look at him. When it faded, he offered her a weak smile.

“Oh my god.” She said, hands reaching out to touch his shoulders, to check if he was real. “It’s you.”

“Is that a bad thing?” He asked, suddenly overcome with doubt.

“No! No, it’s just…” She met his eyes again, and he couldn’t help but admire her. She was so small, in comparison to him. She saved Paris so often, and yet, right now, she seemed so fragile.

“It’s perfect,” she concluded. “You’re perfect.”

He let out a breath of relief, and suddenly she wrapped her arms around him as if she wanted to squeeze the air out of his body. “God, Chat,” she was laughing, now, and her voice sounded a little bit teary. “This couldn’t be more perfect.”

He smiled and reprociated the hug, letting himself sink into her. “So you don’t mind that it’s me?”

She pulled back. “To be honest, I don’t know what I’m thinking. I think it’s shock.”

He nodded. He’d felt kind of the same way – awe, wonder, but a strange cloud over all his emotions – when he first discovered her civilian identity. “I understand. We should talk about it, later, when all of this is over.”

She nodded. “That’s a good idea.”

He wanted to be close to her. It was the first strong, true feeling he’d had since he locked himself up in that damn cupboard-of-a-room in Natalie’s apartment. She was the only thing he could understand right now – the only thing keeping him steady. He wanted to hug her, and kiss her, and spend hours doing nothing but looking into her eyes.

God. Had he always been such a sap?

Marinette’s eyes widened suddenly. “Oh my god,” she whispered. “I know your identity.”

“You do,” he said. “Is it bad?”

“You- I- We-“ she paused to take a breath. “God, Adrien, I’m so sorry about everything.”

He shook his head, hand landing on her arm as if out of reflex. “None of this is your fault,” he assured. “You’re the only good thing for me right now.”

“But… we know each other’s identities. We have to give back the Miraculous.”

“Do we?” He asked. “Because I was thinking about it… if we defeat Hawkmoth, we can keep them, right?”

She sighed. “Chat, I’m scared. What if we don’t get him this time?”

The anxiety – genuine and palpable – rolled off of her in waves. He reached for her chin, tilting it up and distracting her wandering eyes, so that they could land on his.

“We will, My Lady. You and me.”

She gulped, nodding softly. “You’re right. Of course you’re right. I just- doesn’t this remind you so much of how we first met?”

Adrien let himself smile at that memory. Back when Ladybug had been vulnerable, and had turned to him for help. When they’d cemented their partnership as soulmates (romantic or otherwise) and agreed to take on the responsibility of protecting an entire city, together.

“What, that it’s just us again?” he joked. It got a smile out of her.

“No – that I’m the one freaking out, and you seem to know what to do.”

“Well, right now, I think we should get back to fighting.” He said. She winced.

“Oh. Yeah. Okay.” Ladybug – Marinette – nodded her head. “I can do that. I can fight.”

“Hey,” he cupped her cheeks in his hands. “Of course you can. You’re Marinette Dupain-Cheng. Designer by day, superhero by night. You can do this.”

She nodded. “After, we should talk. We need to talk.”

“Okay,” he agreed. Talking. He looked forwards to it.

“Well…” she trailed off. “Whilst fighting a supervillain, there’s isn’t usually much time to talk, so… I’ll see you?”

“Yeah,” he confirmed. The lump in his chest that had arrived a week ago was slowly being melted by her – and it felt good. “I’ll see you.”

“Okay.”

He smiled. “Okay.”

“Tikki, spots on!”

“Plagg, claws out!”

Chapter Text

Group Chat: Ladybug worshippers

12:41

Michelangelo has renamed group ‘Victors’

Michelangelo: so where are we meeting

Foxy Lad: wow, glad to know your priorities

Foxy Lad: are exactly the same as mine

Foxy Lad: is everyone free tomorrow?

Useless Lesbiam: this is going to be so much fun

Ladybug: I can be there tomorrow! Chat?

Chat Noir: Yeah, me too. See you all tomorrow.

Foxy Lad: woah woah woah

Foxy Lad: is nobody going to address the elephant in the room?

Ladybug: I wasn’t actually aware there was an elephant miraculous

Foxy Lad: no

Foxy Lad: Chat, you disappeared for a week

Foxy Lad: where did you go?

Chat Noir: Can I tell you all tomorrow? It’ll make more sense

Ladybug: we have to be careful about tomorrow, okay?

Ladybug: just because Hawkmoth is now in jail doesn’t mean we can give our identities to all of paris

Ladybug: personally, I wouldn’t like the attention

Ladybug: but its also dangerous so beware

Michelangelo: ooo spooky

Ladybug: shush im being serious

Useless Lesbiam: I say we meet up in the Dupain-Cheng bakery

Ladybug: sdfogjthrjwklq;psdofj

Useless Lesbiam: what? It’s small and discreet, and it has the best pastries in paris.

Chat Noir: I’m up for that.

Michelangelo: I want y’all to know that im learning the words to we are the champions to serenade u all tomorrow

Foxy Lad: aww babe how romantic

Useless Lesbiam: !!!!!!!!!!!!PDA!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Foxy Lad: oh please

Foxy Lad: I bet you and your girlfriend are pda central

Useless Lesbiam: not in front of you we’re not

Useless Lesbiam: I put extra effort into my dates to make sure we don’t run into anyone either of us knows.

Useless Lesbiam: then we make out

Ladybug: I have to get back to school, so see you all tomorrow?

Ladybug: do you think if I revealed my secret identity to the world they’d let me off school

Michelangelo: not anymore there’s no villain to go off and defeat

Ladybug: : (

Michelangelo: : )         

Foxy Lad: byeeeeeeeeeee

Ladybug: goodbye!

Private Messages - @Ladybug @Chat Noir

15:16

Ladybug: hey, are you okay?

Ladybug: I know we said we’d talk about this, but you’re still not in school, and I haven’t seen you.

Ladybug: want to talk everything through with me?

Ladybug: if you don’t feel comfortable texting, we can call, or even go and transform and sit on the Eiffel tower

Chat Noir: No, texting is okay.

Chat Noir: I’m just a little confused right now.

Ladybug: That’s okay!!! I wouldn’t expect anything else from you right now.

Ladybug: where were you for the past week, though?

Chat Noir: With Nathalie.

Chat Noir: Did you know she dated my mom? That’s why she remained so loyal to my dad after she ‘disappeared.’

Chat Noir: Turns out he’s been keeping her in a coma in our basement.

Chat Noir: They should make a TV show about this.

Ladybug: I think the anime’s a bit too light-hearted to cover all of this shit

Ladybug: how do you feel about your father?

Chat Noir: His trial is in a week.

Chat Noir: Other than the reveal, I haven’t seen him.

Chat Noir: I think I have to go to the trial, though. As Chat Noir, to testify.

Ladybug: I’ll be right there with you.

Ladybug: I have your back.

Ladybug: ok there’s something else I’ve been wondering

Ladybug: why did you visit my balcony as chat when you see me every day as Adrien?

Chat Noir: Oh. Haha.

Chat Noir: You seize up around Adrien (can you tell me why, please?) but around Chat Noir you’re so open. I only ever got to see that in my superhero form.

Chat Noir: But then when I figured out you were Ladybug, it all kind of clicked into place. I came to your balcony even more to see you, half because I love seeing you but also because I wanted an excuse to know your identity on some accident.

Chat Noir: But you are far too smart to reveal yourself like that, My Lady.

Ladybug: when did you figure it out?

Chat Noir: The day after you told me about what happened with Lila. Nino gave me a word-for-word rundown of everything that had happened.

Chat Noir: Both him and Alya hate Lila sufficiently, now.

Chat Noir: Marinette, I’m really sorry I let all that happen to you.

Chat Noir: I didn’t know how bad it was.

Chat Noir: I know it’s not an excuse, but I’m not in school much, and whilst I am sometimes, I’m not very good with people.

Chat Noir: Kind of comes with the territory of only having one friend and being homeschooled for the first thirteen years of your life.

Chat Noir: Anyway, I should have trusted you when you said she was a bitch.

Chat Noir: She is a bitch.

Ladybug: At least she didn’t say she was Ladybug.

Chat Noir: Now that I know your identity, I understand even more how you got annoyed at her lies.

Chat Noir: Can we expose her?

Ladybug: No!

Ladybug: And I forgive you, Adrien. Even though there’s really nothing to forgive.

Chat Noir: You never told me why you were awkward around Adrien me.

Ladybug: oh haha… long story

Ladybug: I was kind of in love with you

Ladybug: Adrien you

Ladybug: since forever

Chat Noir: Wait really???

Ladybug: ofghejkdfoi this is embarrassing

Chat Noir: I love you too

Chat Noir: At first, I was only in love with Ladybug, but I began to fall for the Marinette I met on the balcony, as well.

Ladybug: Yeah, I was starting to fall for Chat-you, too.

Ladybug: I always thought it was wrong to like two people so I suppressed my feelings

Ladybug: this is literally the best possible situation

Ladybug: I love you

Ladybug: And I know we’ve said it before but I mean this one in a non-platonic most definitely romantic way

Chat Noir: Someone’s gotten very confident.

Ladybug: : (

Chat Noir: You know you love me

Ladybug: I do

Chat Noir: I can’t wait to see you tomorrow

Ladybug: Me either

Ladybug: also, I can’t help but be hung up on the way you revealed yourself

Ladybug: you just fucking whipped it out

Chat Noir: That’s what she said

Ladybug: Where the fuck did you learn that

Chat Noir: I made a reddit asking for all the Gen-Z references, and that came up many times

Chat Noir: I guess you could call me a master at this stuff.

Ladybug: that is also what she said

Chat Noir: ??

Ladybug: You still have a lot to learn

Chat Noir: Yeah, whatever. I accept my fate.

Chat Noir: Can I call you? Just to have your presence whilst I do stuff.

Ladybug: yeah, sure

Ladybug: that sounds nice

Chat Noir has started a Voice Chat

Ladybug has joined

00:09

Voice Chat has been ended

Ladybug: Night, kitty.

Ladybug: see you tomorrow.

Chapter Text

Deep breaths in, deep breaths out. Repeat. Deep breaths in, deep breaths out. Repeat.

Marinette Dupain-Cheng was a nervous person by nature. Seventeen (practically eighteen – she was now one week and a half away from her birthday) years of her life in which she had to worry about everything at the very last minute had led her to be calm under pressure, but nervous about just about anything else.

She looked in her mirror again, checking the clothes she wore were enough to get her recognised. She never wore red; she was always worried it would give away something about her being a superhero. But today she was in a dress she’d designed months ago for this specific occasion, a cute one that was tight at the top but flared out just above her waist, ending a little on top of her knees. It was comfortable, and loose; but it didn’t do anything to help her rising nerves.

Deep breaths in, deep breaths out. Tikki had taught her that mantra. Years ago.

“Tikki,” she called, running a hand over the skirt of her dress yet again. “I’m scared.”

The kwami flew over to her and tutted. “You look great, Marinette! And these are your friends! They don’t care what you look like.”

“No, I’m scared about revealing my identity to them. What if they hate me? I’ve been lying to Alya for years!”

“And she’s been lying to you! She’s Rena Rouge. She’s also your biggest fan – she’ll understand.”

Marinette forced herself to nod. “Okay,” she muttered softly, “okay. You’re right.”

“Everything is as it should be, Marinette!” The kwami gave a satisfied grin, before whizzing back to her place on Marinette’s desk with an assortment of cookies.

Marinette looked back at herself once – and then to the clock on her wall. 1:04.

“Oh, shit,” she mumbled. “And I’m late. Even better.”

Opening her trap door, Marinette hurried down the ladder, then the stairs, and offered her mother and father a chaste kiss on the cheek before entering the café-section of the bakery. True to their words, Alya, Nino and Chloe were all waiting.

“Hey,” she said as she plopped down into a seat. Alya stared at her for a second, and then to her dress.

“Not to be rude,” she began, “but we’re sort of waiting for someone.”

From besides her, Chloe snorted.

“Oh,” Marinette nodded. “No, I know. We’re meeting today.”

Alya’s eyebrows drew together, and she once again looked at her for a second, before studying her dress. After a few seconds, her eyes widened comically.

“Holy shit,” she exhaled. “It’s you. That- It- It makes so much sense.”

“Surprise,” Marinette’s voice lacked enthusiasm. Chloe laughed again.

Alya looked around their little table – to Nino, then to Chloe, then back to Mari. She blinked.

“I just… holy shit, it’s you? You’re-“

“Shh!” Marinette warned. “My parents are here. And so are random civilians. Don’t just expose me like that!”

“Sorry, I…” Alya laughed. “It is so obvious it’s you. Oh my god, I was so blind.”

Marinette smiled. “Chloe? Nino?”

“Oh, I knew,” said Chloe. “I figured I could buy snacks here, though.”

Nino nodded. “I had my suspicions too, with how you talked about Adrien Agreste.”

Marinette’s face lit up, and someone behind her cleared her throat. “Uhm, I heard my name?” Adrien asked.

Alya looked up to Adrien, and then back down to Marinette. “What, and you’re Chat Noir?”

Marinette stood, kissing Adrien’s cheek and hugging him tightly. “Hey,” she whispered into his shoulder.

“Hey,” he whispered back. “I missed you.”

“It’s been, like, twelve hours.”

Adrien pulled back. “So?”

She smiled, shoving his shoulder playfully. “Silly kitty.”

His hands found her waist, and hers his shoulders, and he pulled her in for a sweet kiss. When they pulled away, Marinette turned to their friends – to see two jaws on the floor, instead of one.

“You-“ Alya began.

“The two of you are-“ Nino continued.

“Holy shit!” They both said in unison.

Chloe, safe on the other side of the table, was cackling.

“I literally cannot believe this. My friendship group is a bunch of superheroes. What are the odds?”

“Pretty high, actually.” Marinette supplied. “I pick the superheroes, other than Chat and I, and I can only pick people I trust. Go figure, I trust my friends.”

Adrien jabbed her in the side playfully, and she pushed him away, remaining serious. “But yeah. This is it.”

“Wait…” Nino began. “But I thought your gay awakening was Adrien Agreste.”

Adrien laughed. “That was a good one, wasn’t it?” He said to himself, reaching over to high five Chloe.

“Wow, you literal idiot.” Alya said. “You fooled us all.”

“So this is why you went MIA for a week?” Nino asked as Marinette pulled up a seat, taking a seat with Adrien’s hand still clasped strongly in hers.

“It was. I’m sorry about that. I really didn’t know what I was feeling. Nathalie has agreed to take me in, and they took my mom to the hospital after she was found in a coma in our basement, so… she might wake up? I don’t know, though; and I don’t want to get my hopes up.”

Everyone around the table nodded solemnly. Marinette gave Adrien’s hand a small squeeze. He squeezed back.

“So, are you two dating?” Alya broke the silence by placing an elbow on the table to rest her hand on.

“I- Uh- We-“ Adrien stuttered.

“Yes,” said Mari, turning to him. “If you’re okay with it.”

He smiled, and lifted her hands to his lips. “Of course, My Lady. I’d love that.”

Alya squealed. “Okay. Well, tell me everything. How on earth did you guys hide this from me?”

The table was alive with chatter for hours – of tales of superhero-ing, or jokes, or silly things that they realize now that identities are out in the open. Through it, Marinette’s parents are the ever-welcoming host, offering cookies and pastries until the sun was threatening to come down.

“I should go,” Nino said first. “I have to take care of my little brother, and finish up some homework before sleeping. I’ll see all of you tomorrow?”

“Yeah, I should probably get going too. Walk me home, babe?” Alya asked. Nino chuckled, kissing her cheek.

“Eww, gross.” Said Chloe. “I’ll leave, but only because couples walk slowly and if I don’t get in front of you now, I’ll have to watch your sap until I manage to escape and get home.”

“Bye, you guys,” Marinette stood, offering them each a separate hug. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”

Nino nodded. “I can’t believe we’re all superheroes. This is awesome!”

With a final wave, Adrien and Marinette watched their friends walk down the street until they were completely out of sight. Mari turned back to her black cat, offering him a grin.

“And what about you, mister? Any plans to get home?”

“Well, I told Nathalie I’d make my own way back… but I didn’t say when,” Adrien smirked. “I don’t want to leave you.”

“Does Nathalie know that you’re Chat Noir?” She asked, hands wrapping around his waist. He nodded.

“She caught me mid-detransformation after seeing my father’s unmasking live. But she’s surprisingly cool with it, I think. Nathalie’s not very good at expressing her emotions.”

“And… are you okay living with her?”

Adrien paused. “I… I think so. She’s said she wants me to stay with her, so I don’t feel that much like a burden, and her apartment, whilst small, feels a lot more like a home than my father’s house ever did…”

“Good,” she concluded. “I’m glad everything is working out.”

“I wish I could stay with you,” he said softly. “Now that I know you’re two sides of the same coin, I can’t imagine leaving you.”

“I don’t want you to leave, either.” She pulled him in for another short kiss. “But you shouldn’t walk home in the dark. You should go now. Stay safe.”

Adrien nodded, dejected. “Well… I’ll see you tomorrow?”

“Hey,” Marinette said. “Just because Adrien is leaving, doesn’t mean I can’t be visited by a certain Chat on my balcony later tonight…”

His face lit up. “Okay!” He said enthusiastically. “I’ll get home as fast as I can. Night, Marinette!”

She laughed softly. “Night, Adrien!”

He disappeared around a street corner, and she was left watching after him, a content smile on her face.

Tikki was right. Everything was as it should be.

--FIN--