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"It's ok." Phoenix blinked, trying to push back the tears gathering at the corner of his vision, making it blurry.
You can do this, phoenix. He took a deep breath. Just keep the cover a little longer. He forced himself to meet miles' steely gaze.
"Really, miles." Phoenix waved him off, managing a smile as he shrugged. The smile felt wrong, really really wrong sitting on his face. And phoenix was known to smile a lot, which said something.
Yes, he smiled often. Wore his heart on his sleeve. Didn't mean he was a good actor, though.
"It's not like I expected you to confess your undying love to me." His lips twitched, and he didn't need to check a mirror to see his smile taking that bitter edge he tried to cover all the time.
The bitter, crawling feeling that stayed with him since the moment he had to hand his badge to the court with his own hands. And it had yet to go away, it stayed there even after the day he came back to the court once again.
It was a bittersweet feeling, really. A mix of relief and utter joy, with a lingering thought. And he'd been asking himself if this was actual reality, since the moment he held that golden badge in his hand once again.
...Phoenix was an emotional man, but that didn't mean he was all for the sob stories. His weaknesses were something he had to deal with himself, and him alone. He had one thing to say, though.
He really had to watch his tongue.
There was a flicker of something in miles'-edgeworth, phoenix reminded himself- eyes at the look on phoenix's face. Something different. And Phoenix couldn't put his finger on it, after all those times he encountered different people in his line of work.
Reading people's expression had to be something so easy, so simple for an attorney with such experience as him. Some lawyer he was.
"Look, wright-" Edgeworth tried again, but phoenix stopped him. It was pointless to try and explain because there was no need for that.
Phoenix loved him and edgeworth didn't. How shocking. He saw this coming since the moment he realized his heart was beating differently for a certain prosecutor. It was no big deal.
"Edgeworth, please." Phoenix shifted his weight on his other leg, lowering his gaze to the ground. He felt so pathetic already, and the desperate look on edgeworth's face wasn't helping that small fact.
"I told you. It's not a big deal." He muttered, trying to make himself seem as small as possible. His heart throbbed, his head was pounding and he really couldn't take this conversation right now.
Phoenix needed to get out of here. Anywhere that wasn't here.
"If what you're saying is true," Edgeworth started, and phoenix could feel his eyes searching his face.
"Then why am I seeing deep pain in your eyes?" Phoenix flinched, his hands curled into fists as he glared at the ground. For once, he wished miles wasn't so observant.
"It's nothing a glass of grape juice and a movie marathon wouldn't fix." He promised trucy he would come home early anyway, since it was only friday night. And it would be a great distraction from his messed up excuse of a life. That way phoenix would only focus on his adorable daughter and would be too busy watching over her to think of himself.
"Wright." Phoenix's shoulders started to shake. "Will you stop?" He snapped, lifting his gaze to lock eyes with the prosecutor. He had crossed his arms over his chest, a deep scowl etched on his features as he glared at the attorney.
Phoenix wasn't sure how he felt when he spotted a hint of pain and helplessness behind that scowl. He had to be too tired at this point to be seeing things. Yes, phoenix was ignoring the fact that it was only 10 PM.
Ignorance was bliss, after all. Edgeworth didn't seem to agree with that. His gaze was still transfixed on him, more intense than ever.
"I believe you are enough of a rational man to let me speak, wright." His voice was intended to be cold but it wavered at the end, betraying the emotions intended to keep hidden.
"I get it." Phoenix shrugged, trying to sound nonchalant. The expression on miles' face soured even more. "It's not like i've never been rejected before." Phoenix tried to give him a reassuring smile, but it came out as a grimace.
"I'm used to it." Edgeworth's scowl deepened.
"They did not deserve you." Phoenix shrugged again, clearly not buying into those words.
"Maybe, maybe not." He paused, trying to ease the tension from his shoulders. "Can we still be friends?" Edgeworth looked startled at the offhand question, before recovering fast with an adjust of his glasses. "Yes."
CLANK! Phoenix froze. Another lock was added to the locks that were too much already, red and gold and he had to think that nothing really made sense about it. Nothing.
It was empty, taunting and mocking him about this, this one person he cared about so much that- He was going to be sick.
"Oh." Was all that left his mouth before he turned around, sprinting for the exit. His eyes burned as a lump made its way to his throat.
It was becoming too much, too much to handle. Vividly he could hear a voice calling out his name and he was only a few steps away from fresh air before a strong hand wrapped around his wrist, keeping him in place.
Phoenix didn't need to look back to know who it was. He didn't want to. "Let go, edgeworth." He growled, tensing up when the man's hold on his wrist tightened instead.
Phoenix needed to go right now, or he'd make a mess of himself and make things worse.
"That's not going to happen." Phoenix grit his teeth. "I know you want nothing to do with me." The attorney said through clenched teeth before taking a breath.
"So let me go."
"For god's sake, wright-!"
"Stop pretending!" Phoenix yelled, yanking his hand out of the man's grip and facing the prosecutor with furious eyes.
"It's not like I don't know, miles!" Phoenix didn't even care if he was calling him by his name at this point. The flames ignited inside of him licked and ate away the feeling he tried too hard to bury inside, leaving him shaky on his feet.
It was extinguished as soon as it came though, and all of sudden phoenix was just too tired for any of this. "Stop pretending you care about me," phoenix's voice lowered, shoulders hunched as he tried to catch his breath.
"I'm tired of thinking someone cares about me when they don't." He whispered, nails biting into the skin of his palms as he stared him down.
Edgeworth looked taken aback, though there was an intensity of pain in his eyes that hit him like a truck.
What did he do to deserve this? His line of thoughts were cut off for good when miles reached over, thumbing a tear away from his cheek.
Only that was when phoenix realized he was crying. Yet he couldn't help but stare in utter confusion because if edgeworth didn't care, then why was he still here?
Why was he here when he started to cry, why did he stop him when he wanted to leave this as it was? His finger felt warm on his cheek, cupping the side of his face as if he was some sort of porcelain doll.
"You were always an impulsive fool." Edgeworth murmured after a while, his eyes softening into something phoenix didn't dare to interpret as anything.
"But I believe I owe you an explanation." Phoenix stared at him, contemplating to believe him or not. His eyes searched the air surrounding him and when he saw no lock added to the bunch, he gave a curt nod.
"This isn't something easy to say." Miles' calm mask crumbled, lips curling up into a self deprecating smirk. "Especially after-" he cut himself off, deciding to clutch at his arm instead.
Phoenix raised a brow, crossing his arms over his chest as he eyed the prosecutor.
"After what?"
"After the way i... rejected you." The words came out as if it was physically hurting miles to say them out loud, and phoenix flinched back.
"I told you, it's not like i expec-" miles cut him off, looking pained once again as his hold tightened on his arm.
"Wright." Phoenix gave him a questioning look. "What?"
"Let me finish what I was intending to say." Phoenix scratched the back of his neck, sheepish out of sudden. "I believe you remember your past relationships, correct?" Phoenix winced, averting his gaze from the man as a frown started to form on his face.
"As much as i wish i could forget it, yeah. I do remember." Miles let out a sigh, and phoenix bit his lip. He wasn't sure how bad it was going to be. This was something miles hid from him all the time, so it had to be a horrible secret.
Phoenix fought back to urge to bolt for the exit. He said he'd listen, and he was intending to keep his word. "Dahlia and kristoph...they hurt you." Miles grit his teeth, and strangely phoenix could sense the anger in his tone.
Was he mad at those two or phoenix was reading into this wrong once again? "What they did to you…" miles took a sharp inhale of breath. Phoenix could tell it was hard for him to talk about it, he could see it.
"What i am intending to say is," phoenix sighed. He was getting rejected again, wasn't he? "You've known me since fourth grade, wright." Miles' voice was an octave lower now, which was something really suspicious as phoenix looked up and met his gaze.
"You know what kind of person I am." Phoenix narrowed his eyes. Oh no he didn't mean to be self deprecating, was he? He was so going to get a punch to the face before phoenix talked sense into him.
"That is the reason i am staying away." Miles' lips pulled down into a scowl. "So I wouldn't hurt you." Phoenix's mind went blank. Did he just-?
"Hold it!" Phoenix snarled as his mind processed the words' true meaning, trying and low key failing at keeping his cool.
"Did you just compare yourself to dahlia and kristoph?" Miles had a bitter expression on his face.
"You and I both know i'd have the potential to end up like them, hadn't you waltzed back into my life." Phoenix pointed at him, intently focused on the first part of miles' sentence that he noticed nothing else.
He was going to talk some sense into this idiot. Sure, miles didn't feel that way. Might as well be a good friend, at least. And if by that he had to call miles out on his stupidity, then so be it.
"News flash, edgeworth! You didn't end up like them!" Phoenix grabbed his shoulders, making miles flinch before staring down at him with a surprised expression on his face.
It was as if he didn't expect Phoenix to object to that stupid statement of his. Phoenix's heart sank in his chest. "Listen to me carefully, miles." Miles kept staring at him, before his expression became hard to read once again.
"You're nothing like them." Phoenix paused, letting the words sink in. "The miles edgeworth i know would never take the path they took." He smiled softly.
"He fights for what's right." Miles' shoulders slumped. "How could you say that?" He whispered, running a frustrated hand through his silver hair. A strand of hair fell before his face.
"I've hurt you so many times, yet-" miles took a shaky breath, and phoenix gave his shoulder a squeeze. What happened was in the past, and phoenix was happily willing to move on.
"Yet you have always given me a second chance." Phoenix took a deep breath, letting his emotional dam rise up once again as he stepped back and let go of the other man. "At least…" He scratched the back of his neck, worrying his lip between his teeth as he selected his words.
"Tell me why we can't be friends?" Miles blinked, shock flickering over his face when he processed the words.
"Are you that oblivious?" He asked with uncertainty, as if wondering if phoenix was messing with him or not. The attorney threw him an offended look.
"I'm sorry if us mortals are not as brilliant as you, edgeworth." The prosecutor let out an exasperated sigh, and just when phoenix came up with another snarky comment-
-his lips were covered by a pair of soft ones. And from the background, he swore he heard the familiar CRACK! of a lock and chain rolling back.
Someone was kissing him. Someone was kissing him. Who was it? Who would want to-
Phoenix's eyes blown wide as his mind started to piece it together.
Miles? Phoenix merely stared, before deciding to throw caution to the wind and wrapped his arms around the prosecutor's neck. He kissed back, pulling him as close as he dared. His heart hammered against his rib cage as he closed his eyes, and lost himself in the feeling.
His lungs were on fire as he tilted his head to get better access to miles' lips. His heart threatened to burst when they pulled away, panting and foreheads pressed against each other.
It didn't take long until the truth hit him square in the chest, and phoenix staggered on his feet. Miles had to grab him to steady him, a frown of concern flickering across his face.
"Wright?" Phoenix's hands balled into fists, grabbing into the prosecutor's lapels as he looked at him in the eyes.
"You-" his eyes searched the space around the other man, and when he saw no locks his hands started to tremble. Miles was telling the truth. He-
Phoenix didn't do anything but to pull him into a hug, burying his head in his childhood friend's chest. Miles tensed at the sudden action, though he soon relaxed into the hug, snaking his arms around the man's waist.
"I'm in love with an idiot." Phoenix huffed out a laugh, voice muffled against miles' chest. Miles scoffed, running a hand through phoenix's spiky hair. For once, they were happy. "I can say the same."