Work Text:
"I'm just, an ordinary guy, and nothing even a little bit interesting, ever happens to me," thought Tavros glumly to himself. He slouched further into the shabby couch and watched happy people mill about at the party. Tavros knew he should be up and about, chatting with old friends, having a good time. But even though he was surrounded by people, he had never felt so isolated.
His melancholy thoughts were interrupted by a girl with a wicked smile and impossibly tangled hair practically throwing herself onto the couch next to him. Vaguely annoyed by the social intrusion, Tavros pulled up the hood of his hoodie and crossed his arms.
"Boop!" said the girl, roughly tweaking Tavros's nose.
"Ouch, that hurt," said Tavros.
"I'm The Marquise Spinneret Mindfang! Who are you?"
"Tavros," said Tavros. "Is that, your real name?"
"Any name that resonates with you should be your real name! It's weird how parents can just 'give' you a name. Some people go their whole lives without realizing that!"
"That sounds, like a pretty confident outlook, Miss Marquise Spinneret Mindfang."
"You can just call me Mindfang for short! Hey, do you want to ditch this party?"
"Sure, I mean, I guess," said Tavros, with a confidence he didn't feel.
~~~
Once they were outside, "Mindfang" immediately began doing cartwheels on the lawn.
"Isn't it so freeing to just do what comes naturally and not worry about what 'society' thinks?" she asked mid-cartwheel.
"Yeah, I suppose so. I mean, that isn't something, that I'm ever capable of doing," said Tavros.
"Well let's change that tonight! Come dance with me!" she said, holding out her hands.
"There's not, any music playing."
"We can dance to the music in our hearts!"
Tavros took Mindfang's hands and they twirled around the lawn awkwardly.
"Hey, you know what would be GREAT? If we were pirates!" said Mindfang. "Arrrr, avast ye matey! I am the scourge of the high seas!"
"Um, I'm not sure, I can immerse myself fully, in this fantasy."
"Sure you can, your imagination just needs a little help!" She grinned broadly and winked at Tavros before pulling out her cell phone and dialing 9-1-1.
"Officer... a man tried to... he tried to..." she said with artfully-feigned sobs. Within minutes, a squad car pulled up at their location.
"Is everything all right, ma'am?" the officer asked politely, stepping out of the vehicle. He was not prepared for Vriska to tackle him to the ground and hop into the car.
"Get in, Tavros, GET IN!!" she screeched, and he jumped into the passenger's side.
"I don't know, why I'm doing this, because it seems like, a really bad idea," he said.
"We're doing this because we're PIRATES! Live a little! Cherish the wonder of every moment!"
She let out a final buoyant "Arrrrrrr!" before peeling out and speeding away.