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Mafuyu woke up trembling, every nerve on his body still vibrating with the remnants of his dream. In it he kept hearing, over and over again, the gently strumming of a guitar. Now that he was awake, he could almost swear that those notes hanged heavily in the air around him, as if the melody hadn’t been played in his dream, but right next to him.
He shivered, realizing that he had left the window open. It was freezing. After all, winter was almost there.
He stood up and went to close the window, only to freeze midway, eyes wide open fixated on a corner of his bedroom.
There, barely illuminated by the moonlight, stood Yuuki. Mafuyu rubbed his eyes, and looked more intensely.
He often felt things, things that were hard to explain to others. He had always considered himself a sensitive person, but he had never seen a ghost before.
In spite of that, he didn’t doubt their existence. If something as mundane as our scent lingers in a room after we've left, surely a part of our souls remains after we're gone from this world, or so Mafuyu wanted to believe.
So there it was, Yuuki's ghost in front of him, looking exactly like he remembered. Forever young, eternally fifteen. How unfair, Mafuyu thought, that he has to keep growing old, without him.
He often gazed at the sky and thought that Yuuki was up there, looking down at him. He would talk to him, tell him about his day, how he was feeling, how much he missed him. Sometimes it helped him, made him feel less alone. But sometimes it didn't. Looking up at the sky, all vast and unreachable, made him feel so small in comparison, so fragile.
How long had he wished to raise his hands above his head and float up to the sky, to be among the stars, right beside Yuuki.
He never thought he would get the chance to see him again, though.
Could he really be there, right in front of him? Or was he just a simple conjecture of his mind? It wouldn't be the first time it happened, Mafuyu thought.
Despite everything, he wanted to reach out to him and see for himself, trace with his fingertips those features he knew so well. Would he feel real against him? Or will he just vanish before him at the mere touch?
But no matter how much he wished for it, he was so afraid to move at the same time. It frightened him the idea that if he just happened to avert his gaze, the spell around them might break, and he would go back to how things were before, he would go back to being alone.
So he just stood there, staring, while Yuuki's ghost stared right back at him.
He didn't know how much time had passed while he just looked at Yuuki, like they were both frozen in time; minutes, maybe, or hours. It didn't matter. He only seemed to leave his stupor behind when he heard his name being called, so sweetly, with so much longing tracing every syllable.
"Mafuyu," it was almost audible, but he knew that that was unmistakably Yuuki's voice, though the boy in front on him never moved his lips.
Something tightened on his chest as he opened his mouth to say something, anything, but the only thing that came out was a broken sound.
"I've missed you," he managed to whisper after a long while, his voice all choked up.
"I know," came Yuuki's answer, as if carried by the wind, grazing Mafuyu's skin like a caress.
He couldn’t hold back the tears any longer.
He wanted to say so much, but he didn't know were to start, nor could he find the words to say. There was some much he wanted to apologize for, so many mistakes he wanted to fix.
The tears streamed out of his eyes so furiously that he was shaking by the force of it. He hadn't cried like that in what felt like ages ago.
"Yuuki, I… I…," he tried, the sobs coming more uncontrollably.
"It's okay," said the boy in front of him, with such a bright smile that it hurt Mafuyu's eyes. "I'm here, it's okay."
For how long, he wanted to ask, but he wasn't sure he was ready to hear the answer to that.
He tried to breathe, calming himself, as he managed a few steps towards him.
"Yuuki…" It felt good to say his name. How long had it been since he said it, before this night? It was not like he was doing it on purpose, but he hadn't been able to say Yuuki's name, not since he left.
But now, he couldn't help it.
"Yuuki," he repeated, it was like a prayer coming out of his lips.
Saying it made it real, it helped him realize that this was indeed happening. That Yuuki was in front of him, dazzling as ever.
Perhaps if I say your name over and over again, you will stay with me, you will stay with me forever.
He stood in front of Yuuki, so close now, their bodies almost touching.
"I love you," he heard the boy in front of him say, and this time his lips did move.
Mafuyu closed the distance between them, gently wrapping his arms around his childhood friend, the boy he so desperately loved.
Yuuki hugged him back. He felt so warm against him, so familiar, as if nothing had changed.
Just for a second, Mafuyu thought that perhaps everything had been a dream. That one fateful winter night from his past was just a nightmare, and he was just waking up, with Yuuki in his arms.
But the illusion lasted long enough to take hold of him.
Easy as that, Yuuki began to disappear, turning into mist, slipping past his fingers.
Wait, he wanted to say. Don't leave me. But of course he had left him a long time ago.
Dawn was already there, pale sunlight bathing everything anew, while Mafuyu stood in a corner of his room, alone.
"I love you too," he whispered to nothingness.
He finally closed the window and went back to bed. Kedama hopped up in beside him, tucking himself close to Mafuyu's chest.
He started to hum a song, as if whispering a lullaby to himself, while falling asleep.
That day, he heard the strumming of a guitar in his dream again, but this time he could see who was playing it.
It was Yuuki, cherry red Gibson on his lap, smiling at him.
Forever young, Mafuyu thought. Eternally fifteen.