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Their first date was a disaster.
It all started with Pete showing up late which wasn’t exactly unusual, but the pizza Patrick had ordered earlier was already cold and he was pissed off as well because goddamn it Pete, this is important, can’t you be punctual for once?
Pete smiled apologetically and gave Patrick a short hug that felt way too friendly, not at all how Patrick had planned it. In fact, Patrick would have expected a kiss on the cheek or flowers even, but he had to remind himself that this was new for both of them and that Pete probably found this just as weird as himself.
„So, uh.“ Pete rubbed his neck as he came to a stop in the middle of the living room, looking like he wasn’t sure what to do. Patrick could have slapped him if he wasn’t so in love - Pete had been here a thousand times, worked in this room, sat on the couch, hell, he’d crashed here more often that Patrick could count. But that was when we were „just friends“.
„I have pizza.“, Patrick said and hated himself for how quiet and thin his voice came out. „And, uh, we can watch a movie.“
„Sounds great. Need help with anything?“
„Just sit down.“ Patrick had looked forward to this, but now it seemed like the whole evening would just be incredibly awkward and he needed to brace himself for it. „Might take a minute…the pizza’s cold.“
Pete frowned a little as if remembering that it was his fault, but before he could say anything Patrick added: „It’s fine. Just…don’t be late next time.“, before disappearing into the kitchen.
He took his time, dividing the pizza into pairs of two pieces so he could put them into the microwave individually, letting his mind wander.
He’d never planned on falling in love with Pete Wentz. To this day he didn’t know how it had happened, how all that affection and platonic love for his best friend hat turned into waking up with a boner after having dreams about the man or the weird urge to kiss him whenever they were alone together.
Part of him still hated it, the part that didn’t want to ruin their friendship, the part that was convinced that Pete could never ever like him back because he was straight.
Needless to say that part had been reduced to a minimum since Patrick had found out that Pete did return his feelings and must have had for quite a while now. Or at least that was what Patrick had taken from the kiss and their muttered
„I…uh…“
„Yeah…me too.“
before Andy had stormed into the room, ruining it.
And now, four days later, here they were, having an actual date (that’s what Pete had called it anyway and Patrick was pretty sure it was meant romantically) to talk about their feelings which they would have to do sooner or later, he knew. He also knew that he and Pete could spend hours not saying anything and still having entire conversations while their actual talks could lead to the worst fights. He wasn’t sure he could take a fight today, but he sure hoped it wouldn’t come to that.
When he returned into the living room with the warmed up pizza, Pete had turned on the tv, his feet resting on top of the coffee table. Patrick smiled at the picture as a sense of normality flooded through him. This was how it was supposed to be.
Pete looked up and gave his friend a smile in return, patting the empty space next to him on the couch as an invitation.
Patrick didn’t need to be told twice. He placed one of the plates in Pete’s lap before sitting down next to him with a sigh.
He had expected Pete to behave differently, but he was just as always, stuffing the pizza into his mouth and commenting on the tv program and Patrick wasn’t sure he could take it - was this Pete’s way of saying „Oops, sorry that kiss? Yeah that was nothing we should just stay friends.“ ?
He was usually able to read Pete like an open book, but he supposed he couldn’t do it this time, not when he was too emotionally invested. It made him see things in Pete that he wanted to see, not what was really there. Maybe he’d been wrong all along.
„Are we going to talk about this?“, he blurted when Pete had finished his pizza but still wasn’t done talking about this dumb tv show that didn’t interest Patrick in the slightest.
Pete froze immediately, his eyes widening a little. He didn’t look away from Patrick though and that was a first step. It was still awkward and weird and not how a date should be, but definitely better than before.
„I…I just…“ Patrick pushed his own plate off his lap, burying his head in his hands. Now he had started this argument he didn’t know what he had wanted to say in the first place. Dumb. What had he expected, for Pete to confess his undying love for Patrick? „Why are we here, Pete?“
His friend didn’t answer for a long time, but Patrick could practically feel his piercing gaze. Taking a deep breath he looked up, meeting Pete’s eyes again. Pete’s expression was a lot softer now, like it had been before they had kissed a few days ago and Patrick could hope feel well up in him again, even though he knew it was incredibly stupid.
„We…“ Pete stopped, biting his lip as he thought of an answer. He didn’t seem to find one. It was like watching an entire movie, the way he looked thoughtful at first, but then frustrated and even sort of angry, all in the matter of just a few seconds. „I…I can’t explain. I need to…“
He didn’t have to finish the sentence. Patrick knew what was coming and yet he found himself pulling back just a tiny bit when Pete leaned toward him impossibly close. He could feel the other’s breath on his lips already and he knew he wouldn’t be able to hold himself back much longer.
Pete noticed his hesitation, tilting his head as if to ask: „What’s wrong?“
The only thing Patrick was able to choke out was: „Don’t do it if you don’t mean it.“
Pete’s eyes flickered from his lips to Patrick’s eyes and a small smile appeared on his face.
„But I mean it.“, Pete breathed, closing the distance between them.
Patrick lost track of time as they kissed, way too concentrated on the feeling of Pete’s lips on his - they were so much softer than he remembered and there was this thing Pete did with his tongue that made Patrick sigh and ache for more and-
When they pulled away from each other they were both a little breathless and Patrick felt a burst of that same old feeling he always seemed to have nowadays when Pete was around, as he felt the other’s quickened heartbeat underneath his fingertips where he’d placed his hand on Pete’s chest.
„That was nice.“, Pete said, a wide smile on his face.
„It was.“ Patrick actually managed to sound somehow relaxed, even though he was most certainly not. It was hard to stay calm while Pete had his arms still around him like this and while he could still taste him on his tongue.
„I meant it, you know.“, Pete added more seriously now. „I…I mean it. Patrick, I-“
„Me too.“
„Trick!“ Pete pouted. „I’m pouring out my heart to you, would you not interrupt me?“
And all of a sudden they were back to normal and though it was a little different now they were still them, sitting on the couch and giggling because of Pete being Pete and if anything it was just better now.
Their first date was a disaster. It was also kind of perfect.