Work Text:
If there was ever anyone Akutagawa couldn’t like, it was that skinny freshman in his practical debate class. Dazai had brought him in, just as he had brought in Akutagawa years before. The new freshman, Atsushi, was shiny and golden, and believed in the goodness of human nature. It made Akutagawa want to puke.
He was in the practical debate class to impress Dazai, of course. There was nothing he wanted more than for Dazai to acknowledge him as someone worthy. An approval from Dazai, who had managed to evade the criminal justice system for two decades, was worth its weight in gold. Akutagawa had always admired him and wanted to find out exactly how Dazai had been able to stay free so that he could be the one to break his record.
Atsushi looked like a particularly lazy scarecrow with his bleached hair, his low-slung pants and the t-shirts with the slashed holes. Everything he wears grates on Akutagawa’s fashion sense. His hair is an offense to all senses, the bright dyed strands so flashy that he can’t help but scowl at strangers in the subway with the same shade. And that was not taking into account his puppy-like tendency to ask for the attention of others. Atsushi was a poser, a flamboyant nerd who Dazai kept pushing in front of him until Akutagawa couldn't avoid him. Not to mention the betrayal of Dazai picking Atsushi as his first TA, and not Akutagawa who had been there before him.
Atsushi was so stupidly nice about it, too, talking about how much he appreciated Akutagawa’s thoughts and feelings. Akutagawa wanted to murder him slowly, preferably with Dazai watching. Knowing Dazai he would get a kick out of it, too, instead of remorse over how much he had neglected his favorite student.
And so Akutagawa sat there in Dazai's lectures week after week, sulking, trying to get Atsushi to make a mistake. He adjusted the grant proposal Atsushi had submitted, only for it to go through anyway. He hacked the grading system to randomize the grades, but somehow the next day the network crashed to restore the old grades. He spilled coffee over the assignments Atsushi had arranged, but the fucker had made spares. It was as if the universe itself had decided that Akutagawa had to lose against Atsushi always.
“I have your tea,” the voice of his nemesis interrupted his musings. Akutagawa glared at Atsushi, who did not change his soft smile to a scowl as would have been proper between them. Probably the worst thing about Atsushi was that he didn’t seem to notice Akutagawa’s grudge at all. Instead, he continued to bring him his favorite Boba Tea flavor (Milk Oolong with Lychee Boba) even though that was an embarrassing order. He was just so fucking nice about Akutagawa always coming in short. He always talked about how much he admired Akutagawa’s skillset, and how he wished he could disarm bombs and pick locks as fast as him, and had nothing bad to say about him, ever.
Akutagawa sent another glare at Dazai for pretending to be an upstanding citizen with a long history in law enforcement instead of, well, the yakuza enforcement business. Then, he took a sip of his sweet, sweet tea. “Thank you,” he said very grudgingly.
“You’re very welcome!” Atsushi grinned, his sunny smile stretching over his entire face.
Or maybe the absolutely worst thing about Atsushi was that Akutagawa couldn’t stay mad at him— or Dazai, for thinking him the better human. “The tea shop was on my way! And I know you like sweet things in the morning. It's right next to the shelter where I stay at, and the lady there gives it to me for free if I help with the trash.”
Akutagawa looked towards Dazai, who was listening in as always but was far enough away to pretend he wasn’t. He knew Atsushi had come to Tokyo from the countryside, “found in an orphanage,” Dazai had said. Akutagawa hadn’t listened then, was too preoccupied with the “brilliant but unpolished,” Dazai had mentioned just before. Akutagawa had been Dazai’s first find — also “brilliant but unpolished”, also an orphan, and until that moment, he hadn't felt inadequate. Of course, meeting Atsushi had changed all that.
He felt betrayed by Dazai, even though Chuuya had, in his inimitable manner, tried to reassure Akutagawa. It didn't work. He’d resented Dazai for leaving him behind. He resented Dazai for leaving Chuuya behind, which wasn't exactly rational because Chuuya did as he always had. Akutagawa didn’t know what to do, besides lashing out at Atsushi who didn’t actually deserve any of it.
"You live in a shelter?" Akutagawa asked. His voice sounded strange, and he was sure his words would start a fight. For once, he did not want that, yet. Maybe ever.
"Yeah?" Atsushi replied. He seemed to be bracing for something.
Akutagawa couldn't believe Dazai had put Atsushi up in a shelter. He had a perfectly good apartment! There was a wine cupboard, Akutagawa had seen it! Even though Dazai seemed to prefer Atsushi over Akutagawa in all ways, Atsushi didn't really seem better off. Without knowing Dazai, he could've met an upstanding citizen. Get adopted by a rich lady. Now, Atsushi was set to become the successor to a detective who had at least a few dealings with the mob, and a very shady background. He wasn't even living in a home! Dazai had given him nothing.
Akutagawa remembered how painful the months were before Chuuya had offered him his current job. Barkeeping had kept him in his own apartment, in between the occasional hit-job for the Yakuza.
And like Chuuya had to step in on the things Dazai had forgotten with Akutagawa, apparently, Akutagawa was the one who had to step up now.
Dazai had known exactly what he was doing, hadn’t he? He had put them together on purpose, trying to make this happen. Akutagawa wanted to scream, wanted to vent, wanted to throw Atsushi against the wall--and then suddenly, he stopped. He didn't have to introduce Atsushi to the dregs of society. Akutagawa's apartment was big enough for two--Atsushi wouldn't have to go down his path. If he could have this, have this and keep it, Dazai could arrange all the things in the world. Akutagawa sighed, deeply conflicted. There was no way he could over this, and make it seem casual, was there? Especially not with Dazai watching.
"Please don't tell anyone?" Atsushi said with his wide, pleading eyes. "I'm supposed to have a permanent address registered at the school."
That was the least of Atsushi's problems, good god. Akutagawa could only roll his eyes. Atsushi probably wouldn't even understand the significance of his offer.
“Look,” Akutagawa said in a quiet undertone, hoping Dazai wouldn't find out until later. The hope was most likely in vain, but he could never help hoping. “You can move in with me, for a while. Until you find your feet. I have an extra room. And I could also use someone who takes out the trash once in a while."
Atsushi's eyes lit up. They were more expressive than any Akutagawa had ever seen. He sank further down his chair, wishing he was anywhere else. He could not believe himself. Why had he done this? Why couldn't he have let things be?
Dazai cleared his throat. "If you two lovebirds could keep quiet for a minute, then I could actually do the job I am paid for."
And okay, maybe Akutagawa didn't hate Atsushi--but he definitely hated Dazai. Chuuya could have him. Chuuya deserved a manipulative, disingenuous fucker like Dazai. He was welcome to him, Akutagawa was done. He steamed in his anger the rest of the lecture. He'd show Dazai. He'd be the best criminal, and he wouldn't forget how to be better than Dazai at any moment.
When the lecture was finally out, Akutagawa wanted to get out immediately. Only Atsushi, who was usually the first one up rushing up to help Dazai with this and that, kept sitting.
"What is it?" Akutagawa grunted more than he asked.
"I really appreciate the offer," Atsushi said. "I do! It's just-- please don't feel obligated to help me? I'll manage something on my own. You don't have to worry."
"Idiot," Akutagawa said. "I don't worry. You need a room, and I have one. I expect you to pay me back, and I'm going to collect my dues."
For once, Akutagawa couldn't read the emotions crossing Atsushi's face. "If you're sure," he said, doubt creeping into his voice.
"I'm very sure," Akutagawa said, and that was that. He was going to have to manage to endure Atsushi somehow. (Dazai had made him do worse things, for sure.)