Work Text:
The Truth Behind The Song
Disclaimer: I do not own the Hobbit, nor do I aspire to. If I did, the Silmarillion would get jealous and start declaring wars. You know what it's like.
Elrond ran through the Valley of Imladris in search of his friend and minstrel Lindir. He had just experienced a flash of foresight and deemed it important that his head minstrel should be aware of it.
Eventually, he head the sound of sweet singing coming from the Hall of Fire. Of course, he thought to himself, why didn't I start here?
He patiently waited until the end of the uplifting and not insensitive in the slightest tribute to the Fall of Gondolin before speaking.
"Lindir! I have something important I must tell you."
"Are you alright?" Lindir asked. "You seem... out of breath."
Elrond shook his head, his quick breaths making it sound as though he was in danger of hyperventilating. "I ran through Imladris trying to find you and I am only half elven, remember? The human part of me is... not as fit."
"That's your excuse for everything."
Elrond straightened up. "It's a perfectly valid excuse. Anyway, I had a flash of foresight. Thirteen dwarves, a wizard and a halfling will arrive shortly. I sensed the names Mr. Baggins, Balin and Dwalin, but the other were faint. Oh, and they will have ponies. It is vitally important that you write a song about it before their arrival so they think we're magic and psychic."
Lindir was silent, trying to ensure his lord hadn't completely lost his mind. Eventually, after a long awkward silence, he spoke. "I will do that. How long do I have?"
"I'm not sure. They will arrive... at some point... in June."
At some point in June...
"Oh, what are you doing,
And where are you going?
Your ponies need shoeing,
The river is flowing!
Oh, tra-la-la-lally
Here down in the valley, ha! ha!"
"How did they know we'd be coming here?"
"They didn't. They probably sing this to anyone who arrives."
Oh, where are you going
With beards all a-wagging?
No knowing, no knowing,
What brings Mr. Baggins,
And Balin and Dwalin
In June? in the valley, ha! ha!
"They used your names!"
"The elves... they're psychic."
"I'm sure there's a reasonable explanation."
Oh, will you be staying,
Or will you be flying?
Your ponies are straying!
The daylight is dying!
To fly would be folly,
To stay would be jolly.
Tra-lil-lil-lil-lolly, ha! ha!"
I know this is ridiculously short but my next door neighbour's kid keeps screeching and it's frustrating me and I want to punch something really hard.