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A Not So Silent Night

Summary:

Liam's had a crush on Zayn for months, every time they talk on the phone just making him grow fonder.
He's just never met him in real life.
When he finally gets to meet him, it turns out that he can't take his eyes off him dancing on the table at the bank's Christmas party.
Especially when he starts taking off his sweater.

Notes:

So this was really fun to write, especially because Liam's job is based on mine, and the first scene is a real conversation I had with a guy who worked in Fraud that I had a HUGE crush on. I've wanted to write an AU ever since.
Thank you to the incredible mods, who were exceptionally patient when I had breakdown after breakdown while trying to submit this!
A massive thank you to Mia, the world's best cheerleader, and my group chats always.
I hope you enjoy! :)
The prompt:
“You’ve had too much eggnog and rum and now you’re drunk and doing a strip tease for everyone at this Christmas party, it isn’t sexy in the slightest because you’re giggling and your sweater is caught over your head but I’m still falling in love with you” au

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Work Text:

“ - and I’m telling you, I didn’t give permission for them to use my credit card details. It’s fraud.”

Liam spun around slowly in his chair as he listened, rolling his eyes at Niall with a small grin on his face. It was a common call, something they dealt with multiple times a day, but it was still frustrating when no one listened.

“Sir, it looks to be a subscription of some kind. I can see you’ve been charged the same amount on the same day for the last three months,” Liam explained, ignoring the sigh that came through his headset. “The best thing to do is to contact the merchant and get them to cancel the subscription. We can cancel your card and send you a new one so it doesn’t charge again, but you’ll need to go to the merchant for a refund.” He picked up the pen on his desk and started doodling shapes in his notebook. 

The sigh was louder this time. “It’s fraud, and I want to speak to someone.”

“Okay, I’ll see if I can get someone from our team. I’m just gonna pop you on a quick hold.” Liam pressed the button and groaned as soon as the hold light came on. 

He’d been working at the bank’s call centre for just over nine months, an easy job to hold him over until he figured out what he actually wanted to do with his life. Niall had mentioned an open vacancy in passing, and Liam was glad he’d taken the opportunity. It was stressful sometimes, enough to send Liam home with a heavy heart, and the customers could be arseholes, but the environment was friendly and warm, and everyone Liam had dealt with at the business was kind and genuine. 

There was one particular part of Liam’s job that he loved the most, though. 

He hummed quietly as he called the fraud team, waiting patiently as the ringing came through his headset, heart hopeful until the line was answered, and the best part of his job spoke.

“Fraud department, this is Zayn.”

Liam couldn’t stop the wide grin that spread over his face. “Zayn, it’s Liam. How are you?”

“Leeyum!” Zayn’s voice had already shifted from bored and professional to warm and filled with light. Liam let himself fall into the soft, thick accent that he’d never heard in person. “‘M good, how are you? Busy today?”

“Pretty constant, but nothing to complain about.” Liam flipped Niall off next to him where he’d been making kissy faces since he heard Zayn’s name. “How about you?”

He heard Zayn shifting on the other end of the line, could hear Louis’ cackle in the background. “Same old, ya know? What can I do for you, babe?”

Babe. It still made Liam blush. They worked in completely different departments on completely different floors, and so Liam had never even met Zayn in real life. Instead he’d had to try to handle his crush on the man purely through their phone calls. Niall had offered to introduce them, claimed Zayn was exactly Liam’s type, but Liam was nervous, too worried that he wouldn’t be what Zayn expected. 

It didn’t stop him from sneaking glances at people in the break room though, trying to listen for a Bradford accent.

“Just some guy who’s convinced he didn’t give his card details to someone who’s charged him three months in a row.” Liam felt his face flush when Zayn giggled down the line. “Can you have a look for me, please?”

“Course, babe. What’s his details?”

Liam gave him everything and waited, drumming his fingers on the table as Zayn hummed something, breaking up the mouse clicks in the background. 

“Ah. Thought so. Porn.”

Liam could hear Zayn’s soft chuckle as he spluttered. “What?”

There was a fond sigh. “Li, you know how these go. 19 years old, convinced he’s never seen the charge before, as if he doesn’t know what it is, has no possible idea of ANYTHING he could’ve used his card for three months ago. Trust me. Free trial for porn that he forgot to cancel. Put him through, I’ll talk to him.”

“Who even pays for porn these days? I didn’t think that was a thing anyone really did anymore,” Liam laughed, but the sound was choked when he realised that maybe he shouldn’t be kind of discussing his porn habits with someone he maybe wanted to date.

Apparently it didn’t matter.

Zayn’s barked laughter was enough to set him at ease. “I know! Does he know that you can like, look up free porn online? Do you think he knows?” Zayn’s voice dropped to a dramatic whisper. “Do you think I should tell him?”

Liam’s grin was almost hurting him now, stretched wide across his face. “Please do, and then please let me know how you go.”

“Deal.”

By the time he’d said goodbye and transferred the call, Niall had already scooted over in his chair to set up camp at Liam’s desk. Liam tried to ignore him as he wrote notes on the account, but it was impossible with Niall almost vibrating next to him. He purposefully took forever to type, hming and ahing as he typed one letter every few seconds. 

“Payno! Fucken quit it, I just wanna talk about tonight,” Niall whined, kicking out at him with a determined look. “We have to make a plan.”

Liam closed out of the accounts and swung to face him, eyebrows raised. “A plan for what? It’s just a Christmas party.”

“A plan for you to meet Zayn!”

“No.”

Niall fist pumped the air, drawing the looks of their colleagues as Liam sank down in his chair. “Yes! It’s time, Liam. Time for you and Zayn to meet and confess your love for each other and get married and have lots of babies.”

“I don’t think that’s how it works, mate,” Liam mused, hiding his smile in his hand as he scrolled through his emails. 

“How else does it work? I’m gonna introduce you anyway, and it’s gonna be great.”

Niall kept talking, going on about outfits and eggnog and mistletoe, but Liam was suddenly stuck on the realisation that he actually might meet Zayn tonight, that he’d finally know what his face looked like when he spoke, how expressive he was with his hands, how his eyes lit up when he laughed. It was almost too much, but he pushed it down as another call came through and Niall flew back to his desk. 

He could just deal with it later, he thought as he answered the call and talked about home loans. 

But later came sooner than he thought, just another five minutes passing when an email from Zayn came through. He couldn’t hold in his snort of laughter.

Liam,

Apparently he knows all about the free porn, but he just prefers very...specific types. 

Hopefully you can help bleach my brain tonight to get rid of the images in there at the moment, if you’re going to the Christmas party. 

Please say you are?

Zayn

He didn’t hesitate to reply. 

Zayn, 

I can only imagine! Haha. 

I’ll be there. Can’t wait to help you forget about everything else. 

Liam

He’d just hit send, distracted by the kind woman on the other end of the line, when he realised exactly how it sounded. Oh fuck. He gasped, desperately clicking through to his sent folder to try and recall the email, but when he got the failure email to say that Zayn had already opened it, he groaned and hit his head on his desk. 

“Is everything okay?” 

Bloody hell. He scrambled upright, rubbing his forehead where it throbbed slightly. 

“Sorry Vivian, I just dropped something. So you’re looking to refinance from another bank?”

He purposefully didn’t read Zayn’s reply when it came through almost straight away, waiting until Vivian had left the call, but even then, Niall had to come over and read it for him first. 

Niall snorted and clapped Liam on the shoulder. “Ya both ridiculous. Wear something tight tonight, like any of the fucken t-shirts in your wardrobe.”

“It’s winter, Niall.”

He took a deep breath, and read his screen.

Liam,

Confident. I like it. 

Can’t wait for you to give me a distraction. Hopefully I can give you one too.

Zayn x

Liam couldn’t stop smiling the entire rest of his shift. 

 

*****

 

He’d always hated Christmas parties; too many carols, too much mistletoe, eggnog with too much rum, and always some kind of snack revolving around Christmas pudding that made him wrinkle his nose. 

He’d never been to a Christmas party quite this bad, though. 

Liam understood that he worked at a bank; not exactly a place well known for its ability to let loose and de-stress, but the call centre was always such a vibrant place filled with energy, laughter, and light that it was a harsh disconnect here. 

It wasn’t even that the company had put on an awful party; it was just that it was awkward, the room filled with people Liam had never seen before as they chatted quietly in small groups filled with large silences. The room was gorgeous, tasteful Christmas decorations sprinkling the corners and wooden awnings, a tall tree wrapped in soft rainbow coloured ornaments and glittering lights. Liam was pleased to see no suspicious mistletoe lurking, hoping to catch him unaware, not even above the food or bar where he always took extra care because he’d been caught out before. He hated mistletoe.

Niall was chattering next to him, seemingly unaware of the people shooting them judgemental glances, or at least ignoring them as he waved to everyone and dragged Liam across the empty dance floor. It was warm in the room; too warm considering Niall had shoved a sweater over his head and insisted he had to ‘get into the Christmas spirit, Payno.

It didn’t help that they matched.

While most of the room was wearing something festive, it was all subtle; a red dress here, bauble earrings there, a candy cane patterned bow tie at a table. Niall had never really been overly subtle when it came to Christmas, though.

Liam and Niall’s sweaters were red, which was fine, with Christmas trees on them, which was also fine, but they had fairy lights in them that actually flashed, and a glowing, light up star, which was not fine

“I’m never letting you dress me ever again,” Liam murmured through his teeth, smiling widely at someone they brushed past. “You said everyone would be this festive, you dick.”

Niall just grinned, his hand tightening around Liam’s wrist as he pulled him towards the bar. “Well you wouldn’t have worn it if I told you the truth. Also, we’re not the only ones here in fuckin’ ace sweaters, see?” 

Liam’s gaze followed to where he was pointing to see three people he’d never seen before standing near a table. A tall man dressed in white trousers, flared at the bottom, curls sitting around his face as the bright red nose flashed and stood out starkly against the knitted reindeer on his sweater. His arm was wrapped around the shoulders of another man, tucking him against his side, a soft fringe and disgruntled expression lit up from the solid green holly leaves sitting on top of the knitted pudding on his sweater. There was a third man with his back to them, but even from the back Liam could see the tinsel wrapped around his torso and the way his dark, blond tipped hair flopped gently over his head. 

“Who are they?”

Niall made a soft noise as he pressed a beer into Liam’s hand, and Liam didn’t trust the smirk he was trying to hide. “Come on, I’ll introduce ya.” 

They waded through the growing crowd at the bar, and by the time they got to the small group, one of the men had vanished, and Liam felt like hiding away at the intent stares from the couple. 

“Oi, where did he bugger off to?” Niall jerked his thumb towards the empty space where the other man had been. 

The shorter man rolled his eyes with a sigh. “Dunno, bad fuckin’ timing though.” He stepped forward with a grin. “Who’s this, then?”

Liam didn’t need an introduction, had heard him enough on the phone that he instantly recognised the voice. He relaxed, and grinned back. “Hey Louis, nice to finally meet you.” Liam stuck his hand out, but he was suddenly swallowing an ‘oof’ when he was pulled into a hug. 

“Payno! Fuck, it’s so good to meet you in person. Thought it was you.” Louis squeezed him once more and then stepped back into the space of the man next to him. “This is Harry, my boyfriend.”

Harry smiled widely at Liam, reaching out his hand as he spoke. “Liam, it’s great to meet you. It’s always so nice to put a face to a voice.”

Liam shook his hand as he returned the sentiment, and he can’t believe he’d never put two and two together. Louis’ boyfriend Harry was Harry from Collections, the Harry that was incredibly good at his job because no one expected someone so sweet to be capable enough of such a harsh job. From what he’d heard though, it just let Harry be sneaky, trick arseholes into thinking they could walk all over him until he tore them apart with a smile on his face. There was a rumour that they’d had to separate the Fraud and Collection departments when Louis had snatched the phone off of Harry once when a customer was screaming at him down the line. Louis had apparently sworn at him, protective instinct surging through, and the only thing that’d stopped him from getting fired was how good he was at his job. Their departments were at opposite ends of their floor now, regardless if it was true or not.

It was a disconnect to hear Harry and Louis in real life, to laugh with them and see the way Louis’ eyes crinkled at the corners, or see the tattoos on Harry’s arms that he’d only heard about when he pushed his sleeves up. Liam had just finished his beer when a voice came from behind him, and he froze. 

“Remind me never to get stuck talking to Sylvia again, yeah? There’s only so much I can listen to about someone’s grandkids.”

Niall and Louis had matching smirks, glancing quickly between Liam and the man behind him, but Liam still tried to convince himself that it wasn’t happening because he wasn’t ready for it. There was absolutely no denying the accent though, or the soft drag of his words. 

He turned around slowly, and came face to face with Zayn for the first time. 

He definitely hadn’t been ready. 

There was so much for him to take in that he wasn’t entirely sure where to look first; the soft wave of his hair that fell across his forehead, the dark eyes and slightly pouty lips, the nose ring and tattoos delicately inked into his neck. He settled into just staring at Zayn’s entire face, too stunned to even appreciate how fucking beautiful he was. It wasn’t until Niall nudged him from behind that he realised he should speak. Zayn beat him to it anyway.

“Hi.” His voice was slightly breathy, and Liam would’ve felt slightly smug if he hadn’t been rendered speechless. “‘m Zayn. Please tell me that you’re Liam.”

It startled a laugh out of Liam as a flush rose to his cheeks. “I - yeah, ‘m Liam. Hi.”

Zayn’s entire face softened, and Liam let himself get lost in the way it finally felt to see him, to take in every detail of every emotion that flickered across his face.

Leeyum.

Liam almost choked, the single word enough to remove all rational thinking from his mind as he reached out to tug at one of the baubles hanging from Zayn’s sweater. 

He sighed happily. “We complete each other.”

Zayn raised his eyebrow, a delighted smile tugging at his lips even as Niall whispered a harsh ‘fucking hell, I didn’t think he’d be this useless’. “Do we, now?”

Liam flushed further, his face surely a deep red by now, but it was too late to pretend he hadn’t said it. “Yeah, I just - I mean that I have a tree that has lights and a star and you - yours has tinsel and baubles and - and the tree would be decorated completely if it -.” Liam groaned and let his head drop forward. “Please ignore me, I’m not usually this awkward.”

“He’s really not,” Niall piped up, but Liam didn’t think it’d helped. 

At least he didn’t until there was a soft hand closing over his where he still fiddled with the bauble, and his head snapped back up to lock eyes with Zayn. 

“I think it’s brilliant.” Zayn’s hand stroked softly over Liam’s knuckles, and the one reasonable thought he’d managed to have in the last 30 seconds vanished again. “I’m already proper distracted.” The arch of Zayn’s eyebrow was a challenge now, and Liam jumped at it. This, he could do. 

“Only just the start, love,” Liam shot back, and the pleased look on Zayn’s face almost made him tremble. 

They were pulled out of the moment when Niall clapped, jumping slightly when he spoke. 

“Right! As you know boys, it’s time for us to make the Christmas party actually fun,” he announced, ignoring Louis’ groan. “Fuck off, Tommo. Now, I know you hate it Payno, but it’s Christmas, so suck it up. It’s time for eggnog.”

Liam threw his head back with a groan, already hating himself tomorrow. The soft laugh from Zayn made it worth it, though.

 

*****

 

Liam was tipsy now, too much eggnog swirling slightly uncomfortably in his stomach, the added rum doing just enough to make him giggle at everything Niall said. Most of the party was halfway to drunk by now, the atmosphere more vibrant and loud and edging towards too much. They were standing near the bar, chatting to some of their work mates, but Liam couldn’t keep his eyes off Zayn where he was laughing at something Louis had said across the room. 

Zayn

He was somehow everything that Liam had expected, but nothing like what he’d thought. He was incredibly kind and encouraging, asking Liam questions when most people would let him close himself off. Liam had always struggled to open up, used to being outshone by people louder or seemingly brighter, but Zayn looked at him with soft eyes in a way that made him feel like he was the only person that had anything interesting to say. He was affectionate too, his hand seeming to flit over Liam’s body in careful touches to his bicep or thigh before resting there with a soft squeeze as they spoke, leaning in closer where they’d sat almost already pressed up against each other. He had a wicked sense of humour, one that made Liam cackle in a way that caused people to stare, but it was always worth it for the chance to see Zayn’s pleased grin. Zayn was flirty too, innuendos and compliments falling easily from his lips in a way Liam had never been privy to before. Liam kept up with him though, letting his fingers brush Zayn’s hair back or leaning in close to his ear to whisper to him and make him blush. The only thing keeping Liam in place right now was Niall’s arm thrown over his shoulder. 

Zayn and Louis were laughing together now, almost holding each other up because they’d been adding extra rum to their drinks from the flask tucked into Louis’ jeans. Liam had already known he’d wanted Zayn when they’d first spoken, wanted to date him and kiss him and never let him leave, but here now, even at their work Christmas party, he was only a second away from bounding across the room to kiss him, lack of mistletoe be damned. 

He was just about to, the alcohol making his decision for him, when his most hated Christmas song came on, and Zayn climbed up onto a table with a giggle. 

Wait. Zayn was climbing up onto a table.

Liam was standing just below him before he even realised, not sure how to help or touch to make sure everything was okay. Zayn was already balanced now though, feet surrounded by Christmas crackers and holly strewn on the tables. 

It was easy to ignore Mariah Carey’s voice echoing through the room when Liam was terrified Zayn was about to fall and break his neck, but he suddenly froze at the first wolf whistle that cracked through the air. His brain took a moment to catch up.

Zayn was still giggling, kicking out at Louis where he was laughing just as hard from the ground, but then Louis stepped back with a wide grin, hands raised in defeat, and Zayn’s fingers played teasingly along the bottom of his sweater. His face turned sultry for all of half a second before he started giggling again, slowly pulling up the hem of his sweater as his hips swayed to the beat. Zayn’s fingers ran softly across the strip of skin that he’d bared as Liam watched, desperate to follow the path with his tongue. 

Certainly not here, though. 

It all shifted again though when Zayn tried to pull the sweater over his head, half the party screaming the repetitive lyrics on the dancefloor while the other half watched Zayn, the faux strip tease paused as he struggled. The noise was deafening regardless, people jeering and cheering and whistling, and Liam couldn’t help the surge of need to protect, to stop everyone from leering. 

He still couldn’t pull his own eyes away. 

Liam could hear Zayn giggling even through the material where the sweater was pulled over his face, his t-shirt risen just slightly, and the entire moment lost any sensuality when Zayn seemed to flail, the sounds just turning into full blown laughter. 

Liam could easily have lied and said later that this wasn’t the exact moment he fell in love with Zayn Malik, but he’d always tried to tell the truth, and when Zayn would ask him three months later, he’d be able to recall the scene perfectly as if it was projected in front of them. Zayn was making soft sounds of frustration now, little chuckles still sneaking through while he twisted slightly to take it off. Liam couldn’t stop the fond smile that crept onto his face, couldn’t control the pounding of his heart as everything in him seemed to recognise that, ah. It’s this. This is perfect.

He’d just resigned himself to pining for the rest of his career, for everything to go back to how they were at work, sporadic phone conversations and easy flirting that killed him a little bit, because there was no way someone this beautiful, this sweet, this brilliant would ever feel the same way about him. It just so happened that was the exact moment that Zayn finally freed himself from his sweater, spun around in triumph, and promptly fell off the table. 

Liam didn’t even think, couldn’t, every instinct in him screaming to move as Louis gasped next to him. He jolted forward, arms wide, grunting with the force when Zayn landed perfectly in his arms, heaving him up higher as Zayn’s arms clumsily wrapped around his neck. 

Holy shit. 

In moments like this in the movies, it was always silent for a beat throughout the whole room before it erupted in applause. Liam was sure that if this was a movie, he’d deliver a smooth line that’d make Zayn blush, and then they’d be kissing in the middle of the party, everything else fading away as they lost themselves in each other. 

But it wasn’t the movies, and no one seemed to really care except for Louis, and instead of saying something smooth and seductive, Liam managed to mix up the sentence in his head the second he locked eyes with the man in his arms. 

“I guess I fell for you.” Liam’s eyes widened as soon as he realised, groaning as Zayn snorted into his chest. He could feel Zayn shaking with barely suppressed laughter as he shifted to bury his face in Liam’s neck. “Fuck, I - I didn’t mean to say that, I tried to - I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to.” He carefully put Zayn down, ignoring the soft noise of protest from him even as Liam’s hands came up to steady him, gripping Zayn’s waist as he swayed. “I tried to say something clever but it all came out wrong and even though it’s true, I meant it to - .” He was cut off by a gentle finger pressing against his lips. 

Zayn’s face was so incredibly fond, even through the haze of alcohol, that Liam wasn’t sure how to react. Months later, wrapped up in Liam’s duvet on a Sunday morning and just after Liam’s own confession, Zayn would admit that this was when he’d realised he’d fallen in love with Liam, too.

Zayn’s finger traced gently over Liam’s top lip. “Take me home.”

Before Liam could protest, mind whirring at the bluntness of the sentence, of a way to gently let him down because Zayn was drunk and there was no way Liam would take advantage, no matter how much he wanted him, Louis piped up.

“Zayn, fuckin’ hell, you could’ve died,” Louis scolded, but he threw his arms around Zayn’s waist, almost tackling him to the ground. Liam missed his touch immediately. “Let’s go home, time to go home now.” Louis pulled back, patted Zayn on the cheek with a slightly dopey grin, and shouted across the packed room as he almost skipped towards his boyfriend. “Oi! Hazza! Let’s go, yeah?” 

Liam reached out to steady Zayn again as he swayed, startled when Zayn stepped forward to squish his face into Liam’s sweater. Slender arms wrapped around Liam’s waist as Zayn sighed, and with a constant don’t be weird don’t be weird don’t be weird running through his head, Liam let his arms slide around Zayn’s shoulder, one hand coming up to cup the back of his head. 

He swallowed heavily when Zayn pulled back slightly, eyes wide, bottom lip pulled between his teeth. Liam couldn’t quite remember what they were supposed to be doing, where they were, or exactly how it felt before he met Zayn. He felt drunk, but he knew it wasn’t the alcohol, knew that it was Zayn’s soft smile, Zayn’s hands rubbing circles against his back before they slipped under his sweater, Zayn tilting his head to rub their noses together, Zayn Zayn Zayn. 

It was the smell of rum on Zayn’s breath that cleared some of the fog from Liam’s mind. 

Liam shuddered, forcing himself to move and let his lips rest against Zayn’s temple. He scratched lightly at the back of Zayn’s scalp when he heard him whine, loud even over the sound of ‘Silent Night’ playing through the speakers now. 

“Leeyum.” Zayn’s lips were brushing gently down Liam’s jawline, teasing and barely there. “Kiss me, c’mon.”

Liam’s fingers threaded through Zayn’s hair, hoping the touch would ground him. “There’s no mistletoe.” It was a weak argument, and not the right one, but it was all he could manage at the moment. “And do you really want Silent Night playing in the background for our first kiss?”

“Well,” Zayn murmured, his breath fanning over Liam’s neck, “as long as it’s not our last kiss.” 

Liam was incredibly close to just saying fuck it and kissing him anyway, until Zayn spoke again.

“Then maybe we could have a not so silent night.” 

There was a beat, a solid pause before Zayn giggled, and all of the tension bled out of the moment as Liam laughed, pulling Zayn closing into him to hold him against his chest. 

It was a helpful reminder that this was still Zayn, the comic book geek who snorted at Liam’s bad jokes and sent Liam pictures of puppies when he could hear in his voice that he’d had a bad day. 

It also reminded him that Zayn was drunk, and this wasn’t how he wanted this, because he wanted this forever, and maybe he was still tipsy but he knew that much. 

“Not like this,” Liam whispered, and he swore his heart almost leapt into his throat when Zayn clung onto him tighter. “I - I want to, trust me, but not like this.” 

“Tomorrow, then. Come back and stay at mine with the other lads, and then tomorrow morning, if you still want to, kiss me.”

Liam cupped Zayn’s face, the slight stubble there prickling against his palms. “Tomorrow. I’ll make you breakfast and everything.”

The sound of Zayn’s laughter was still his favourite thing, and there was a warmth that flowered in his chest and settled there when Zayn linked their fingers, and didn’t let go. 

 

*****

 

Liam was too warm when he woke up, and too disoriented to figure out why. He blinked rapidly, the room too bright, but when everything cleared, it still didn’t make sense. 

The wall he was staring at next to the bed was navy blue instead of cream, and the light fixture above his head when he shifted was fancier than the one in his room. There was a disorganised bookcase where a record player usually sat, and on the back of the door was a full length mirror instead of Liam’s grey wool coat. 

It took a small, snuffling sound to draw his attention to the bed, and a puff of breath against his neck to snap him out of it. He tightened his arms on instinct, and then he realised the warmth was a body pressed against him, a face pressed into his neck, a leg thrown over his and an arm across his stomach. 

He realised quickly that he was still at least wearing pants, that Zayn was too, and then it started slowly filtering back through to him; the five of them piling into an Uber with Zayn on his lap, linked hands resting on Zayn’s thigh, getting back to Zayn’s to watch Niall pass out immediately on the couch and Harry and Louis stumble to the spare room. He could remember perfectly the moment he’d helped Zayn into bed, laughing as he snuggled into his duvet, but it was the memory of Zayn murmuring for him to ‘stay, Leeyum. With me, please. Stay’ and the desperate tug on his sweater that seemed burned into his brain. 

Liam wasn’t hungover, just...overwhelmed now. He’d woken up tangled with the man he’d wanted for months, but suddenly he needed to be somewhere else. 

He wriggled out of Zayn’s hold, brushed Zayn’s fringe back from his face, and snuck out to use the bathroom. He couldn’t hear any of the other boys, assumed they were too hungover to be awake yet, so he thought the best thing he could do after a shower was to cook up whatever he could find in the fridge. 

Would Zayn even want him anymore? Was it just because he’d been drunk that he’d considered Liam, or told him to kiss him? Liam tried to push it all out of his mind as he pulled eggs and turkey bacon out of the fridge, but the way Zayn’s lips had felt on his neck and the way his hands had held Liam tightly as Christmas carols had tried to ruin his night in the background stuck with him, clinging to his heart. He wasn’t sure how he’d feel now if he’d met him, only to have it all taken away. He felt like he’d known Zayn for years, not just months, and that they’d met before; maybe they had, in another universe, and this was just their souls meeting again in another life. 

He could hear the shower running now as he popped bread into the toaster, but it seemed irrelevant compared to the constant buzzing in his head. Liam absentmindedly flipped an egg, trying to figure out the best way to approach Zayn for a date now. 

The toaster popped, Liam startled, and then a voice from the doorway made everything irrelevant anyway. 

“You’re cooking breakfast.”

Liam spun, spatula still in hand, and took a shaky breath. Zayn was leaning against the door frame in soft grey joggers and a black vest, hair slightly damp, an earring in that Liam hadn’t seen last night, and glasses perched on his nose. He was rubbing at his eyes, soft and gorgeous, and Liam had never felt this type of pull towards anyone before. 

It wasn’t his call, though. Not now. 

He gestured weakly, an awkward grin lifting at the corner of his mouth. “I said I would, so,” he trailed off as Zayn shuffled closer, his hand dipping into his pocket. 

“You also said you’d kiss me.”

“I - you were drunk, I didn’t want to assume.”

Zayn carefully took the spatula from Liam’s hand, their fingers brushing as Liam stared, reached past him to turn the stove off, and lifted his other hand above Liam’s head with a smirk. “It’d be awfully rude not to, though. There’s mistletoe and everything. It’s called Christmas spirit, Liam.”

Liam could feel the tension leave his body as if it was a physical presence holding him down. He chuckled, glancing up at the plastic mistletoe Zayn was holding over his head. 

“Well, if it’d be rude not to,” he murmured, reaching up to rub gentle thumbs over Zayn’s cheekbones, cupping his face and revelling in the way it caused Zayn’s eyes to flutter shut, “I guess I can get into the Christmas spirit.” He let his thumb trace Zayn’s chin, tilting it slightly, and moved forward to press their lips together. 

He felt the mistletoe hit the top of his head as Zayn let it slip through his fingers. Liam kept the kiss chaste and light, soft pressure and lingering pecks, even as Zayn’s hand fell to thread through his hair. He pulled back with a sigh when Zayn sucked lightly on his bottom lip and pressed their foreheads together. 

Liam ducked away slightly with a laugh when Zayn chased his lips. “Leeyum. Get back here.”

“But the mistletoe’s gone.” Liam let his hands drop to Zayn’s waist, and he couldn’t stop smiling to kiss Zayn anyway. “Hardly Christmas-y anymore.”

He didn’t have time to steady himself properly before Zayn was launching forward and kissing him again, harsh and passionate and biting. 

Fuck the mistletoe.”

Notes:

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