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Zidian stands before Jiang Cheng, easily a foot taller and even more intimidating.
The glistening patterns in her robes that look like lightning strikes, doesn't detract from her regal bearing and it hurts Jiang Cheng's heart just a little bit to see so much of her mother's mannerisms in the way his own weapon moves before him.
"What's that ugly face for." Zidian mocks, as she inspects Jiang Cheng's face.
Her hands are holding Jiang Cheng's cheeks and Jiang Cheng quells his urge to slap it away. He doesn't like being treated in such a way, but he is unsure if he can purposefully destroy the only artifact that remains of his own mother.
He holds his ground but expresses his displeasure, scowl evident in his face.
Zidian just laughs at him, with tone still mocking. "You've always been trying to look tough. But you can't fool me, boy."
She tightens her grip, Jiang Cheng scowl only deepens.
"I'm not a boy." comes Jiang Cheng's instantaneous reply. He can't remember the last time he was called a boy but now he thinks, that this family heirloom has every right to call him as such.
Zidian merely laughs at his remarks, knowing it to be untrue in comparison to her age.
"I know. Silly boy." Jiang Cheng is ready to defend himself when Zidian continues to invade his space.
He expects to be harassed by her hands again but her expression shifts from that of her mocking smile to a gentle one and Jiang Cheng finds himself being enveloped in a hug.
"I've been listening.", Zidian says, as if she's been wanting to answer Jiang Cheng's pitiful musings for years.
Her voice is as warm as her body as she speaks and the familiar feeling of comfort that Jiang Cheng has associated with Zidian is now a more tangible presence in front of him.
Then, Jiang Cheng recalls every moment he has spoken to his own ring, in pain and in tears, as he relays to her on dark nights his sorrow and longing at everything that he had lost.
In his darkest moments, he had wanted to share the pain with someone but all he ever had was Zidian, who can neither hear nor comfort him like his family once did.
But did an orphan, ever had a choice on who he could confide in.
To hear it from her own lips that she's been listening makes Jiang Cheng take a step back.
"You've done a good job. Well done.", is what she says as she pats his head softly. Jiang Cheng can't help but feel his face twist as emotions long buried, make his longing for affection renew and open for all to see.
Jiang Cheng still doesn't understand why he cries in Zidian's arms as he hears her words.
They mean nothing now.
He had wanted to be the closest uncle to Jin Ling, but he didn't want to be the only presence in his life as he grew up.
He may have once wanted the large glory of doing something admirable but never did he think he'd be rebuilding his own sect from the ashes.
He never wanted to be the only one left behind. He wanted to die when he was captured. Instead, he had been the one to steal his golden core from his own brother and bring about his own downfall.
He may have grown into his own person and earned the glory of his title, but he had lost everything else.
And in the end, did he even have the right to question why his life was the way it was.
When the time comes, he will be alone and he knows only Zidian and Sandu would be there with him.
"Stop crying." Zidian's voice rumbles, like thunder crashing through his thoughts.
"I am here," Zidian assures him, as if she knows every last one of Jiang Cheng's own worries and has an answer for all of them.
Jiang Cheng desperately wants to believe them.
Thus, when she promises, "You will never be alone again.", there's conviction in her words, that makes Jiang Cheng hope.
Even if it's just for this moment, he believes in her as definite as lightning finally hitting the ground.