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Kylo had imagined the plethora of ways that he could be pulled back to the light, but as he held Rey and the edges of his vision blurred, it was Ben who realized that he had not prepared to fight the pull to this other light.
The fear he had lived with before as Kylo in losing the battle of denying the light in him was nothing compared to what he felt now.
Rey looks at him now as if he held the stars in his eyes and he almost feels as if he does have it in him, bright and burning. With her kiss still on his lips, his emotions have never felt so vivid — a sharp antithesis to what he knows to be his fading life force.
Ben can tell when she starts to sense that something is amiss, but he would make the same choice a thousand times over. With everything inside him free and untethered, it was clear this was the only way he could find peace. And he has. Ben’s at peace after so, so long and he can hardly tell the feeling of it apart from dying.
He cradles her cheek in his palm and takes her in as visions flash before his eyes. Not from the force, but of his hopes — Rey’s smile directed at him now and for all the days to come, an embrace from his mother to welcome him home, a furred forgiving hand on his shoulder from an old friend, a blue saber firm in his grip and healing with every day that the sun rises. Ben sees it all and more in Rey’s hopeful gaze. He holds on to that hope as his vision fades to black.
After all, hope was his saving grace.