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"If only I didn't meet you.."

--

Slowly and reluctantly, he blinks. Closing his eyes for a second, and blink again. Streaks of sunlight penetrates through the window, giving him no other choice but to wake up. Rubbing his knuckles on his eyes, he stretched his arms above his head and yawn. His eyes roams around, as if searching for something, only to release a long sigh. He reached out to the side table and grabbed his phone. A text message..

txt: Mingu

Hyung, I left some food for you. See you around in school.

Jihoon put aside his phone, as he dragged his feet out of the bed. He took his time to do his usual morning routine and put on whatever clothes he have on hand. He took whatever things he needed for the day, not even caring much about his appearance and finally head out.

 --

"Hey, remember that dance routine we saw yesterday? Wanna accompany me tonight?" Soonyoung, sounding as excited as ever was walking along the corridor with Jun. To him, meeting Jun was like fate. lt was a sort of bond that's ineffable. "I kept replaying it last night and now, I could still see the video in my head." Soonyoung ran a few steps ahead and turns to face Jun. "How was it again..? Uh.." Taking only a few seconds to recall again, Soonyoung began to dance accordingly shortly after.

Jun watched Soonyoung moves in beat in awe, before realising where they are. "Ah- Soon.." 

Too late. Soonyoung hand swung towards another being in an attempt to do a double axle, causing the other to fall. Panicking, Soonyoung offered his hand out to the other male. "I'm so sorry I ended up getting excited I-.." 

Shades of pink. Pale white skin so delicate that it could even be mistaken for a girl. The small annoyance on that small, round face which he strangely knew way too well. Lee Jihoon. Soonyoung's hand does a retreat and he took a step back.

"Tsk.." Jihoon glared at the taller male. He stood up on his own and cleans off his own hands. Not even uttering a single word, he just walked past the two dancers with hands in the pocket of his hoodie. 

To Jihoon, aside from music, anyone out of his small tiny circle is not worth his time. And Soonyoung is no exception. Jihoon may not have interacted with Soonyoung before. But just the sight of that person is enough to dampen his mood. Probably because they are nowhere alike. Who knows. But one thing for sure is, unlike the fact that he is just indifferent towards other people, Soonyoung is just a big 'no'. Simply said, Jihoon hates him. No reason needed.

Jihoon can no longer be seen. Jun walked towards Soonyoung and pats his shoulder. "You okay?"

Soonyoung who was frozen until just a second ago let out a long sigh. "I don't know. I just don't understand." Soonyoung began walking again with Jun following slightly behind him. "It's just strange. I could easily talk to anyone, even the quietest person out there but when it comes to that guy.... It's just different. We don't even know each other but it's like we're not allowed to be on good terms." Soonyoung sighs yet again. "Hey.. What do you think of him?"

Jun leaned back against the wall of the corridor and shrugged. "I don't know. He's quiet and probably not someone I would hate, I guess. Are you feeling something else?"

Soonyoung followed the other and thought momentarily. "Hm.. How should I say this.. My heart aches everytime I saw him. Those kind that feels like as if I did something terrible to him in our past life or something.. "

--

"Jihoon!! Over here!" An over familiar voice called out to Jihoon as soon as he stepped his feet into the lecture hall. 

Jihoon who was openly pissed looked at the direction of the voice to see his friend waving at him, showing his signature gummy smile. His other hand gesturing the empty seat that he saved for the Jihoon. Jihoon walked towards Seungcheol without wasting any time. 

"So what's with that face? Oh, and here's the assignment brief from the previous class." Seungcheol asked, his face resting on his hand. 

Jihoon removed his bag and placed it on the table infront of him before taking a seat. "A kid who lost his way in this school compound." His face slightly calmer as compared to a second ago. Seungcheol is the only person that matters. Probably because they have been together since young. As Jihoon is an introvert, he really treasures the personal space that Seungcheol provides. A person who understands. A good companion. Someone who had went through a bunch of things along with him. 

Seungcheol chuckled at the answer. "That infamous Soonyoung again, I assume?" Jihoon glared at the other when he heard the name. Seungcheol looked at Jihoon cheekily. This may be an everyday thing but Seungcheol finds it interesting every single time. "So what did he do this time?" 

Jihoon rolled his eyes and leaned back on his chair. "No idea. He swung his hand and hit me."

Seungcheol continued laughing. "Woah isn't that some big progress there? You guys finally had some physical contact!" 

Jihoon clicked his tongue at the statement said by the latter. He glared at Seungcheol before heaving a sigh. Jihoon adjusted himself to a more comfortable position. "Anyway, I had that dream again. It's been happening way too often lately."

In just a second, seriousness took over Seungcheol's face. "What... did he say this time..?"

Jihoon shrugged. "He didn't say anything this time." Jihoon paused for a while, as he bit his lower lips. "If only I didn't meet you, was what I told him." Jihoon continued softly.

"AAHH..!!!!"

A scream could be heard from a distance, enough to make the two male at the back looked up from their own conversation, towards the door. As if there is a monster or something in the class, the guy pointed at Jihoon's direction, his pupils shaking. Upon locking eyes with the guy at the entrance, Jihoon face darkens, his aura becoming intense. Kwon Soonyoung..

Shortly after,  a lecturer cleared his throat behind the blonde male. "I'm starting class." 

"Oh sorry!!" Soonyoung quickly apologised. He looked around the lecture hall and noticed that Jun had already sat elsewhere with no empty seat beside him. Soonyoung continue looking around only to see an empty seat right beside his 'worst' nightmare. 'Nice...' He muttered under his breath. 

Jihoon take a look around the class too and realised the horror himself. His eyebrows furrowed in annoyance. "Ya, he's walking towards our direction. Do me a favor and switch seats with me..!" Jihoon whispered, loud enough for his friend to hear. But Seungcheol just pretended not to hear and keep a poker face. 

"Ya, Cheol!!" Too late. Soonyoung was already at the seat. 

A what seems like a forced smile was plastered on Soonyoung's face. "Um.. There's no other seat left so if you don't mind.." Jihoon remained silent. "... I'll just... uh... try not to bother you."

---

As if fate was playing with them, the lecture was talking about an assignment which require the class to work in pairs. 

Jihoon glanced over at Seungcheol who was openly flirting with the guy next to him. Seungcheol, who finally realised Jihoon was looking at him, clasped his hand together. "Sorry Ji. I'll be working with him so maybe next time?" Jihoon just nods his head. He sighed and just slumped on his chair while waiting for someone to approach him. He is more than prepared to work alone if needed. Seungcheol turns back to that guy and immersed himself in their own conversation.

Soonyoung on the other hand stood up from his seat after what felt like forever and walked towards Jun. He pulled Jun into a back hug, scaring the latter. "Jun~ Lets pair up!" 

Jun turns to see his friend. "Ah..." Soonyoung looked at Jun in confusion. "I.. decide to work with Hao." Jun smiled and points at the male beside him. 

Soonyoung pouts for a second. However, since there was nothing else he could do, he grinned. "Then I'll just look for someone else~" He looked at the male beside Jun. "Take care of our Junnie. He can be a pain sometimes but he means no harm."  Ming Hao nods his head, a little confused at first but he dismissed it right after.

Soonyoung looked around the lecture hall. Everyone seems to be getting into pairs. He took a large sum of air, enough to not be drowned by the noise level in the lecture hall. "Is there anyone looking for a partner?" Everyone stopped talking, all eyes on Soonyoung. Realising they are not relevent, they all continue to go back to their own small discussion. 

The lecturer walked towards Soonyoung. "That's strange? We're supposed to have even numbers.." he mumbled. The lecturer squint his eyes when he caught sight of something towards the back. He walked towards the back of the hall, gesturing Soonyoung to follow him. "Jihoon right? Do you have a partner?"

Jihoon who was already having his head down on the table looked up to see the lecturer. "...no." However his eyes laid on the guy behind the lecturer. "Actually. I'm fine with working alone. I would rather work alone than working with-"

The lecturer cut Jihoon mid sentence. "Then its confirm. You're both pairing up! Time is ticking so better get the discussion started."

Jihoon looked at the lecturer who is walking back to the front in disbelief. "You must be kidding me.." Jihoon muttered under his breath. Before he know it, Soonyoung was already sitting down beside him. Again. Jihoon rest his head on the table again.

"We don't have a choice. Junnie forgot about me and we're the only one left so..." Soonyoung shrugged. 

Jihoon just rolled his eyes. He did not need to be told. He just sighed heavily and looked at the paper infront of him, a pen being fiddled in between his fingers. 

Clock is ticking. Time gets shorter as every minute passed. However, their discussion have yet to start. The silence between them was unbearable. Soonyoung could not take the silence any longer. In fact, the thing that have been bothering him all this while is taking a toll in his mental state. "Hey. Do you hate me?"

Jihoon looked at the latter before looking back at the papers infront of him. "Yeah. I hate you."

Soonyoung could feel his heart cracked. Hurt could be seen on Soonyoung's small eyes without himself realising. But that won't get him anywhere. "I see.." Soonyoung mumbled softly, a smile plastered on his face. "I don't think I hate you but lets put personal matters aside. We only have a week to get this done and over with. You can hate me even more after this but we can't escape from this." Soonyoung shifted himself to Jihoon's line of vision. "What kind of music do you like?"

Silence on Jihoon again as he looked away. Soonyoung frowned as he placed his hand on Jihoon's face so that Jihoon faces him. Soft.. Wait that's not it. "What kind of music do you like? I like upbeat ones. Ones that I can groove to. What about you?" 

Jihoon swatted the pair of hands away. His eyes already wandering elsewhere. However, he could still feel Soonyoung's gaze on him. Jihoon sighed once again. "... i prefer mellow songs. Ballad kinds to be specific.." Jihoon mumbled, taking a short glance at the taller male after a while.

Stars began to form within Soonyoung's eyes. Their music preference differs but that is not the point. Just hearing an answer from Jihoon after being ignored over and over again was enough to make him happy. What seems like a genuine smile could finally be seen on Soonyoung's face. 

Jihoon found himself being attracted to the pleasant look infront of him. However, he was quicked to brush it off, his hand smacking Soonyoung's head lightly. "Wipe that disgusting smile off your face." Jihoon looked away yet again. "I seriously do hate you.."

  ---- 

"So how's class?" Mingyu asked Jihoon as he proceed to take a seat opposite Jihoon. Seungcheol burst into a laughing fit, earning himself a punch on his shoulder. Mingyu look at the pair in confusion.

"He had to pair up with his Soonyoung for music theory. You should have seen their interactions!!" Seungcheol, still laughing, got himself another punch but harder.

"That's because you decide to flirt with that kid and ditch me." Jihoon said in annoyance. 

Mingyu attention on Seungcheol now. "That..  kid?"

Seungcheol felt his face burning. "I was not flirting! We just happen to click and.. yeah. That's it."

Jihoon rolled his eyes. "Yeah. You should have seen yourself too when you talked to your Jeonghan instead of me." He smirked. "A girl in love.." Jihoon whispered, loud enough to be heard by the two. 

Seungcheol immediately stood up. "I'm gonna get my food since Mingyu is already here." Jihoon just laughed in response. Mingyu just looked at the two in amusement.

When Seungcheol got further away from them, Mingyu leaned in towards Jihoon. "Oh yeah, Hyung.. Who's Soonie..?"

Jihoon looked at the latter in confusion. "Who?"

"I was about to leave but then I heard you saying that name in your sleep." 

Jihoon kept a poker face. "No idea. I don't even remember what I was dreaming about." Mingyu may be his dorm mate but there are still many things that Mingyu does not know about Jihoon. The dream he had since young being an example. He just does not want to be teased by the younger male too regarding this matter. Just being teased for being shorter than the latter is enough.

"If you say so. You seem to be having a lot of bad dreams lately." Mingyu shrugged. 

---

"Jihoon~" 

"...."

"Jihoon~!!"

The shorter male turned around, his brows knitted together. "Don't call me so familiarly. I don't want to be associated with someone like you."

"Ouch. That's harsh." Soonyoung pouted before his smile took over his face. "You're alone now right? Can you accompany me till evening? Minghao invaded my precious dorm and he's sending me daggers with his eyes." Soonyoung paused. "You're not allowed to say no. Seungcheol told me that you no longer have class~" 

Jihoon clicked his tongue upon hearing his friend name being mentioned. "..Since when are you guys on talking terms?"

Soonyoung grinned. "Since yesterday. When you leave him behind. He approached me!" Soonyoung showed a peace sign along with his dazzling smile. "He is such a nice dude~"

The other day, Jihoon left early as soon as class was dismissed. Things were just terrible for him. Having a confusing dream, followed by the encounter with Soonyoung at the hallway, and the entire class time. Jihoon just rolled his eyes at the latter's remarks. "Yeah.. nice. Wait till you see his clingy, annoying side."

Soonyoung gasped dramatically. "You should have seen Junnie! He's like a kid! The kind of things he do in our room.." Soonyoug shook his head at the thought of his room mate.

Jihoon laughed at the remark. "Aren't you guys suppose to be close buddies or something? Look at you now."

"Yeah-" Soonyoung paused, looking at Jihoon. A hint of surprised could be seen in his small, slanted eyes. Jihoon actually laughing infront of him caught him off guard. Especially since the latter is openly annoyed by his entire existence. Even stating his hatred towards him. Soonyoung eyes fixed on Jihoon's laughing expression.

The laugh stopped abruptly when he noticed the look on Soonyoung's face. His usual serious face seen on his face once again as if the smile a moment ago was nothing but a dream. "What?"

"You're really beautiful..." Soonyoung mumbled softly. Soonyoung realised what he had just said, his ears turning red. "Uh.. ah.. Yeah! We're super close! I still love him even though he's like a kid~"

Jihoon did not catch the words directed to him and seeing how flustered Soonyoung is, he chose not to press on it. "So what is your plan? It better be worth my time."

Soonyoung eyes sparkled, his hand grabbing Jihoon's wrist. "Dance studio! Since we have nothing to do, we could start writing something for our assignment! We also have some instruments there. I also heard that you can play the guitar so why not~?"

Jihoon just let himself be dragged by the taller male, noticing the small tint of red creeping at the latter's ear. The entire walk was quiet between the two.

---

"I'm home!!" Soonyoung pushed the door open as he dives into the polished floor of the studio. Jihoon just walked into the foreign room, his eyes looking around the room. What seems like the company logo could be seen on the wall opposite the mirror wall. Two black sofas placed at the side of the room, opposite the door along with a small side table. Some band instruments could be seen at the corner of the room, near the sofa, making the room looked less empty. And in the middle, a random Soonyoung rolling around.

"Welcome to my paradise~" Soonyoung sat after rolling for a countless number of times. 

Jihoon eyes falls on the dazzling smile of Soonyoung. "What is this place?"

"It's my healing place." Jihoon raised an eyebrow. Another name to this place. Soonyoung laughed at the latter's reaction, his smile faltering slightly. "Well, you see. This place meant a lot to me." Soonyoung laughed. Sadness unconsciously overtaking his usual radiating self. 

Jihoon remained silent as he waits for Soonyoung to continue. His face void from any emotions. Or that's what it seems like.

A single tear. Followed by another. 

"Oh my. I'm sorry!! Why am I even crying..!" Soonyoung immediately turned around, his back facing Jihoon as he desperately tries to stop his tears. 

"Just cry if you need to. Don't worry about me." 

As if on cue, all his welled up tears started to roll down his bunched up cheeks. A second later, he felt a strangely comforting singular hand patting his head. "Jihoon ah, I'm so sorry."

---

 ~♪

He feels warm. A soft surface against his back. A beautiful melody accompanied by a soothing voice. He opened his eyes to see an unfamiliar hoodie around him to keep him warm from the coldness of the room. His eyes darts towards the piano, noticing a very angelic back. Soonyoung looked at the smaller male in a dazed. The said male however was too focused in his own world thus not realising that the latter have woken up. ".....angel.."

Jihoon heard a familiar voice behind him and finally stopped whatever he was doing. "You're finally awake." Jihoon said as a matter of fact.

A small blush began to crept at Soonyoung's cheeks before a sudden realisation hits him. "AH-!!"

Soonyoung immediately stood up from the sofa and crouched down, his hand messing his own hair. "Oh my god I'm so sorry Jihoon I really messed up big time and ended up wasting your time and I really did not mean to cry and I mean I had never cry when I normally come here but-" 

"Ya." Soonyoung immediately kept his mouth shut as soon as he heard that over familiar cold tone. He slowly peeked, only to see a piercing gaze on him. He immediately looked at the floor. "If you think you're wasting my time, shouldn't you get yourself ready?" 

Soonyoung mustered his courage to look Jihoon yet again. Jihoon had already turned his back against Soonyoung. "I already got started on the beginning of the thesis. I need to know if you are fine with it before proceeding." A short pause. "I'm sorry for playing the piano without permission but I thought I should get started with the assignment from my other module instead of wasting time."

Soonyoung smiled upon hearing a softer tone this time. He giggled and walked towards Jihoon, picking up the papers near Jihoon. "Sorry Jihoonie~"

".. Don't call me that. We aren't even friends."

Soonyoung pouts, a finger placed on his chin, as if in thoughts. He smirked. "But it suits you, Jihoonie..~"

"No."

"Whatever you say, Hoonie~ I'll call you whatever I want!" Soonyoung flashed a smile so bright it left Jihoon speechless. Little did he realised the shock in Jihoon's eyes. It was however replaced by a small smile tugging at the corner of his lips.

'As much as I hate it, a smile still suits him best.' 

---

"So how was your date earlier~?" Seungcheol tapped Jihoon's shoulder before sitting on Jihoon's bed. "Are you guys closer now?"

Jihoon looked at his friend, eyes widen apart. "You.. You set me up didn't you?"

Seungcheol shrugged. "I don't know what you mean~?"

Jihoon rolled his eyes. "Whatever." Jihoon went to sit beside Seungcheol. "Anyway, I'm confused."

Seungcheok gasped dramatically. "You mean our genius little maestro is stuck in a rut?! I'm shooked!!"

Jihoon laughed as he smacked the latter's shoulder. "I'm being serious!!" Jihoon then released a long sigh. "I think that guy in my dream.. I found him."

Seungcheol widens his already big eyes and gripped Jihoon's shoulder lightly. "What?!"

"Hoonie... please don't leave me." 

After an hour of silence, a soft, fragile voice finally break the silence. Jihoon fingers trembled slightly above the white keys of the piano after hearing the words uttered. Feeling afraid, Jihoon slowly turned to look at Soonyoung who was currently sniffling in his sleep.

"...Didn't we promise.... to be together? Even after our many lives.. We.. why must it always end like this..?" His eyebrows furrowed. He curled himself against the cold hard floor.

Upon seeing that sight, Jihoon closed his eyes. He may not be able to see now but his ears could still hear the soft muttering of the voice.

"I'll pray to get my life taken instead so please.. don't leave me again.. please."

"You.." Jihoon voice croaked. Without realising, Jihoon was already kneeling infront of the sleeping male. His emotions was a wreck.

After what felt like forever, Jihoon start to drag the taller male towards the sofa, supporting himself with his own weight. He attempt to lie the male on the sofa and succeeded. He then took off his hoodie and cover up the male. Jihoon slowly carress Soonyoung's cheeks, an apologetic smile seen on his face. "This is the least I can do I guess.." He leans in and pecks Soonyoung's forehead. "I'll continue to hate you no matter what happens in the future. I hope that you understand that I am doing this for us, Soonie.." 

"Ji... You mean.."

"Sorry Cheol. But after seeing that.. even hearing the exact same words.." Jihoon shook his head. "This may be your source of entertainment but if I do end up liking him.. No. I will never bring myself to like him. I just don't want him to suffer.."

"But I don't get it!! Let's say this is just a premonition, can't you just do something to avoid it?!"

Jihoon just smiles and shook his head. Deep down, he knows. That this is not any typical premonition.

---

Days when by as per usual. The pair meets once everyday and their progress were going well. Soon, they were done with their assignment and that marks the end of their work. When it was the submission day, they submit their work together and get a cup of drink at the cafe nearby and that was the last time they hang out outside of lecture. There are instances where Soonyoung would call Jihoon outside of class but Jihoon always manage to get away. 

Jihoon is now at the courtyard, waiting for Jeonghan and Seungcheol to come. It was hard for Jeonghan at first. Jihoon was never an extrovert but after getting to know Jeonghan more through Seungcheol, Jihoon decided to lower his walls a little around Jeonghan too. 

Jihoon stares at the sky above him as he reminiscise about an incident that happen not long ago. At that time, Jihoon does not even acknowledge Jeonghan's presence. But seeing how Seungcheol were late for lunch that particular day, he was left alone with Jeonghan.

"So... I heard from Cheolie that you guys were childhood friends?" Jihoon only gave a nod. "That's nice. Well you see, I kind of envy you. You're super unfriendly but because you have a childhood friend, you're not alone." Jeonghan sighed as he secretly took a glance at the shorter male. "Seeing you two together, it reminds me of someone. He moves to somewhere far away a long time ago. I really miss hanging out with him." Jihoon remains silent. He was not particularly interested anyway. Little did he realised the small smile forming on Jeonghan. "I love him. Does he loves me? Who knows.."

Jihoon suddenly felt annoyed. He glared at the latter. "So? What's your point?" 

Jeonghan smirked. "You're finally looking at me. But calm down young man." Jihoon clicked his tongue, his eyes not leaving Jeonghan. "Jihoon. Have you ever liked someone and even though you know it's hard, you still choose to chase them? That was me with him."

"....." Jihoon looked at the sky above him.

"From what I have seen, it would be nice if you actually listen to your heart at least once." Jeonghan grins. "Well, those are just some random words from this old wise man so~" 

"You're not even old. If you are, so am I." Jihoon retorts.

Jeonghan giggled before he put his hand together.  "Oh right! Just to tell you that I'm not playing around with Seungcheol okay? He'll get sulky if he knows of this~"

For the first time, infront of Jeonghan, Jihoon laughed.

Jihoon smiles to himself. He changed back to his usual stoic face as soon as he felt a tap on his shoulder. "Hello!" 

Jihoon turns and stare at the male. "...What do you want?"

The male flashed a disgustingly annoying grin. "Soonyoungie miss you~"

"Huh?"

"You and your friends. Me and my friends. Let's eat together!"

"Huh?! Where did that come from-"

"Uh Junhui.. Right? " Seungcheol, along with Jeonghan approached the two. "Is something wrong?" 

Junhui smiles at the two. "Let's eat together!"

---

Blinks. Soonyoung looked at the three male that sits with them and back to his own friends. And then back to the three. He blinks again. He leaned towards Jun and whispered, "Why did you bring them?"

Jun looked at Soonyoung and grins. "Someone was jealous of me and Hao and he is also in daze so to give him a companion.." Jun felt proud. 

"Ah! Now that I think about it, you guys are from that music theory module!" Jeonghan put his hand together. "No wonder you guys look familiar~"

Seungcheol lightly flicked Jeonghan's forehead. "How could you not realise until now?"

Jeonghan pouts. "Because a certain someone would not leave me alone, how am I even suppose to get to know the others?"

Seungcheol just laugh it off.

"Anyway, I'm Jeonghan if you don't know me. Like our Jihoonie, I'm majoring under vocal composition." 

Junhui looked at Jeonghan and smiles. "We know you. You're quite popular among us dance majors." Junhui took this chance to sneak a glance at Seungcheol. An obvious pout could be seen on Seungcheol. "Ahah! Don't worry too much about it, Seungcheol~ There's this dongsaeng of ours that growls at anyone who fawns over Jeonghan."

Jeonghan and Seungcheol raised a brow. "Dino!!" Junhui grins. "Jeonghan hyung got this really menacing hyung by his side now so can you stop ogling over him!, is what he would say whenever he hears someone talking about you." 

Minghao nods in agreement. "He's very cute."

Jeonghan laughed. "I adopt good kids~" 

The other four were immersed in their own getting-to-know-each-other conversation. Jihoon remain fixated on his food, not minding about the others while Soonyoung secretly glance at the latter.

---

"Jihoon..!" Soonyoung ran after the younger male. "Why do you have to be so rude!!" Soonyoung caught up with Jihoon as he pull him back. 

Jihoon glared at Soonyoung for a good five seconds before looking away. "It's none of your business."

"Even so.. To actually say that to our friends in love. Can't you at least try to relate or understand?" Soonyoung used his free hand to pinch his own forehead. "You know. I was able to tolerate a little with you avoiding me. But how could you be so closed off.  How are you able to say things without any emotions. Aren't you a human like everyone else? Do you not know the feeling of being in love? Why do you try to hurt anyone that tries to get to know you? Stop acting all big." His words ran off on its own, as if everything have finally been set free. However, never once did Jihoon react. As if his words were nothing.

Soonyoung sighed in distress. "You know what? Forget it." Soonyoung looked away, in hope it would cool himself down. "You're like this afterall. We are nowhere alike. I understand that after all those discussions we had for our project. But I think you're right. I am nothing but a bother." Soonyoung let go off Jihoon's wrist. A bitter smile made itself known. Soonyoung turned his back against Jihoon. "Like what you have always wanted, I'll stop coming after you. I shall face this reality. This feelings that I have for you for unknown reasons, I'll throw it away." His voice shakes at the last few words. "Goodbye, Lee Jihoon..~" 

Jihoon stood still as he watched Soonyoung's back slowly disappear, pain only visible after Soonyoung was gone. "...i'm sorry too. But this is for the best afterall.."

---

"Ji!!" Seungcheol banged on Jihoon's table slightly, earning looks from others in the library. 

Jihoon took off his headphone and looked at Seungcheol. 

"Hey. I heard from Han that you got forced to participate in the school showcase tomorrow?" He slipped at the empty chair beside Jihoon. Jihoon focused back to the papers infront of him after nodding his head. "I see. I can't wait to hear your next masterpiece~" Seungcheol grinned. 

Seungcheol frowned when he saw the voidness in Jihoon's eyes. "Say Jihoon.. It's been 3 months already. Are you really fine? You always claim to hate him but I think you know that it was never hatred.. right?" Jihoon did not react. Seungcheol slipped a piece of paper beside Jihoon. "I'm always here to listen anytime." 

Seungcheol stood up and smiles slightly. "That's the schedule for tomorrow's showcase! Stay till the end, said someone~"  

Jihoon glanced at the paper. Once Seungcheol left, he looked at the last performer. Questions filled his mind.

---

It's an official fun day in school. Nowhere was quiet and everyone could be seen pacing around excitedly, students or visitors alike. 

Jihoon sat at his waiting room backstage, not wanting to step a foot outside. He stared at the male whom he was sharing a room with. 

"Ah- please don't mind me. I'll be going to my hyung's room once they are ready!" The boy said and flashed a smile. 

Jihoon leaned on the couch and closed his eyes. He does not even intend to perform but seeing how pushy the school is, he decided to just caved in. But a performance is still a performance so he will still give his all regardless.

Jihoon eyes immediately opened when a loud cheer could be heard even from back stage. He looked around to see no one else in the room. He looked at the wall clock.  

12:36pm

There's still about an hour left till his allocated time slot. Jihoon stood up and head out nevertheless. He decided to walk towards the backstage where he could look at the other performers on stage. 

"Then let's bet! Whoever got the softest cheer during our own spotlight will have to do a dare! No hard feelings though~"

"I may be younger but I won't lose to you guys!"

"Aha! We'll see about that-"

"Hyung?"

Jihoon saw three familiar faces alongside a guy who was in his room just a while ago. Jihoon just looked down immediately and stood there frozen, not even taking any short glance. 

".. Lets go Dino."

"Hey." The two are left alone after what felt like forever. "Didn't know that you'll be performing." Soonyoung smiled slightly.

Jihoon remained silent. Talk about timing.

"I won't ask you to watch my performance if you don't want to but... I'll watch yours. I'll even stay till the end." 

Unfair.. Jihoon looked up when he heard the last statement however. His throat was dry. " The.. end..?" 

Soonyoung could hear the confusion in Jihoon's voice. He blinked. He then shook his head and smile. "Forget that. Just me and my assumptions." Soonyoung walked towards Jihoon, his hand patting the latter's shoulder. "Good luck." And he walked off.

---

Ten minutes till showtime. The boy band was leaving the stage while Mingyu, the MC of the day was entertaining the audience. Jihoon looked at the stage from the gaps of the curtain, his eyes soften in the process. A look filled with longingness and warmth. Four males in black  buttoned up shirt with designated coloured ties that suits the individuals with skinny jeans entered the stage. However, Jihoon's eyes never once leave that one being in the center. 

A smirked formed on the lips of the center guy. "Let's hype this up!" He said loud enough for his mates to here. And as if that was the cue, the music starts. 

"Hyung.. You're red." A teasing voice whispered by Jihoon's ear.

"..Go away Mingyu." A delayed respond.

Mingyu chuckled and pat Jihoon's hair lightly. "Don't forget you're next, yeah~?" 

Jihoon hissed at the taller male only to earn himself another chain of laughter.

At one point, Soonyoung's back was facing the audience. He was looking aimlessly by the side as he prepares for his highlight part. His eyes widen when he caught side of Jihoon. His heartbeat accelerated. Soonyoung closes his eyes and mentally count. Three. Two. One. 

Soonyoung spun powerfully to face the audience and earned himself a cheer. He danced as if his life depends on it. Emotionally. Sharply. Swiftly. Soonyoung controlled his body well to portray the emotions intended. 

In the process of the turn, as if on slow motion, he eyed Jihoon, a side charismatic smile shown only to the male.

'You're really cruel..'

The stage ended and all four of them are drenched with sweats. Mingyu was back on stage and gave Soonyoung the mic.

"It's Hoshi here~!!" The audience laughed. 

"Come on, Soonyoung! Everyone already knows you!" Jun laughed.

Soonyoung laughed too. He then smiles. "We all had our own shining moments and they're of different interpretation. Like my friends here, I too would like to thank whoever helped us in the process. And also, to the one that unconsciously gave me inspiration. Thank you." Soonyoung closed his eyes momentarily before flashing his signature toothy smile. 

'This three months have been lonely and painful but surprisingly beautiful.. Thank you, Hoonie.' Soonyoung bowed alongside his friends before they left the stage to pass the time back to Mingyu.

"..Soonyoung." 

Soonyoung ears perked up, his eyes laid on the beautiful thing a distance infront of him. "Jihoon.." 

Jihoon walked pass Soonyoung as he draped a face towel on Soonyoung's shoulder. As if under a spell, Soonyoung eyes trailed after the other.

Jihoon had entered the stage. He sat at the stool in the middle, a spotlight flashing on him a moment later. Eyes filled with emotions, for the first time in a while.

♪ Our past that did not line up
If I can go back in time
Rather than roughly but warmly
Would I be able to let you go? ♪

'No matter how long it is.. No..' Jihoon stood up.

♪ This waiting
Its not easy to endure
If I forget someday
As if nothing is wrong
Our future is empty and sad
It's not that I want to forget you ♪

Jihoon walked a few step forward. a sad smile seen at the corner of his lips. From where he was standing, he could see Seungcheol with Jeonghan. Seungcheol who looked at him softly, listening word by word, tears forming at the corner of his eyes. It was just a mere showcase. But the songs he wrote. In the end they were all nothing but his actual thought. 'I really can't do it afterall.. I really don't want to forget you.' 

♪ We were happy about us
You who isn't with me anymore
Although I dont want to see you, I miss you
Although I hate you, I miss you
I don't understand myself as well ♪

Teary eyes. Jihoon closed his eyes tight, putting all the emotions he failed to produce in his lifespan. 

♪ What kind of future is to come before us
Even if the Heavens refuse to give us an answer
Until the end, I'm too stupid
So I don't understand the answer. ♪

A strained smile. Jihoon looked at the audience once more before turning his back against them. His tears starts rolling down his cheeks. 

'Jihoon...' Soonyoung squat down, his hands wiping the tears that drops uncontrollably.
In between the gaps of his fingers, through his blurred vision, Soonyoung gazed at the boy on stage. 'You're really beautiful..'

As soon as the song had come to an end, before Mingyu even start MCing, Jihoon immediately ran off to the backstage, pass everyone. No way will he ever let people see him cry Soonyoung who was too absorbed by the stage immediately got on his foot and chase after Jihoon. 

Stairs after stairs. Turning at the corner of the hallway. And stairs up again. Jihoon pushed the door open, his pace gradually reducing. Jihoon count down mentally. 

Five.....

Four....

Three...

Two..

One.

Jihoon staggered a few steps back when he felt a pair of arms wrapped around him. The two was quiet, only their sobs could be heard.

After several minutes, as if scripted, the two sat by the walls of the rooftop. "I'm sorry." Jihoon muttered.

Soonyoung shook his head, his eyes focusing at his own fingers. "I really don't know what I did to make you hate me though." Soonyoung laughed bitterly.

Jihoon shrugged. He pondered for a while on what to say. It's clear that Soonyoung is still not aware of who he is afterall. "You didn't do anything.. It's all me."

Soonyoung hesitantly looked at Jihoon.

Jihoon pressed his lips to form a thin line. "I shouldn't like you. Since that would only bring you pain all over again." Soonyoung raised an eyebrow. "You don't have to understand it.. Soonie.." Jihoon smiled, a glint of hurt could be seen however. Jihoon looked at Soonyoung to see the latter's eyes widen.

Soonyoung who was always the one talking. The Soonyoung that was often smiling like an idiot. The Soonyoung that usually speaks his mind out, he hung his head low. He thought over thinks by himself. The two gazed over the sky, the soft echo of the noise from the ground floor accompanying their silence.

"Say. Does the name 'Pledis' ring a bell to you?"

Jihoon eyes widen for a split second before hiding it behind a puzzled look. "Isn't that our school name-"

"No.. Before you enroll here. How do I say this.. Like when you were younger or something. When you knew nothing of this school's existence. Have you ever feel like you are tied down to that name. Like there's a connection to it. Uh.." Soonyoung rubbed the back of his nape as he tried to make sure his question could be understood.

Jihoon resigned. "..I do."

Soonyoung gulped at the response. "D-Do you get strange-"

"Yes I get strange dreams often. One that seems like as if it was real." Jihoon cut Soonyoung midsentence and add on.

"Then-"

"Soonyoung." Jihoon looked into Soonyoung's eyes. "You always end up hurting yourself over and over again because of me. I'm not sure why. And I don't know how many times we have crossed path but-"

"1717.." Soonyoung voice was soft. He avoid contacting eyes with Jihoon. "This is our 1717th time." 

Jihoon was left speechless. Nothing make sense to him anymore. 

"We have went through this more than a thousand times and it all ended differently. The only similarity? I was always left behind." Soonyoung smiled bittlerly.

"So why-"

"Jihoon, do you want to know a secret?" Soonyoung glance at the male and grinned. "You said you will make things right.  That studio I brought you the other day, that was the place we first met and that was the place it ended on our 1716th loop." 

Soonyoung stood up and stared at the sky. His back facing Jihoon. "Don't you think its cruel? Everytime the calender hits the 22nd of November in the year of 2019, I'll awaken as a child all over again, with this memories. And when I meet you again in what you would say the future,  strangely you find ways to avoid me. To hate me. Even though all you have is nothing but vivid dreams." Soonyoung voice was trembling. "While I remember everything.."

"Soonyoung I-"

"Jihoon, will I have to repeat this all of this again tomorrow? How many more times do I have to go through this till you are satisfied..?"

Jihoon stood up and wrapped his arms at the waist of taller male. "I'm sorry.. "Jihoon gripped onto the latter's clothes. "I'm so sorry.." 

Soonyoung, for the first time, was expressionless after saying all he wanted. He have been hurt overtime. Some times harsher than other. In fact, he was prepared to repeat all of this again, even if it would broke his heart further. Soonyoung is tired.

"..soon... young..."

Bzzt..

Bzzt...

Soonyoung glanced over the side. "....Jihoon. your phone.."

"...."

"I'll answer it then."

Soonyoung picked up the phone, his brow creased at the sight of the name. Mingu. He released a sigh before answering. "What do you-"

"Uh.. Hoshi? Well whatever. We need Jihoon Hyung onstage now! The teachers are furious. Apparently they set him up to do the ending performance."

Soonyoung looked at Jihoon who was coincidentally staring at Soonyoung. 

"Uh.. Ten minutes.. Give him ten minutes."

---

Jihoon is now behind the curtain that covers the stage. The principal successfully manage to drag the time with those super long and boring speech. Soonyoung on the other hand was holding Mingyu by the collar.

"This may be uncharacteristic of me but how the hell do you not know that he have to do the ending stage when you're the one running this program?! And how sure are you that Jihoon can successfully pull this off when he himself are not aware of it?!"

Mingyu just laughed apologetically. Jeonghan pushed the two male apart and clear his throat. "Thanks Mingyu, I'll deal with this guy." Mingyu bowed and immediately left. 

"Well.. the teacher asked me for suggestion since the last one back out last minute so I said his name. Is there anything wrong with that?" Soonyoung immediately shut his mouth and shook his head. "Anyway, you were told to be here till the end right?" Jeonghan grinned. Soonyoung just looked at Jeonghan in confusion. Jeonghan dragged Soonyoung to the front of the stage

The curtain opened, revealing a Jihoon in white. As if naturally, Jihoon eyes falls on the boy in black. 

The familiar cheerful tune began to play. Jihoon eyes widens at the sound of it, a warm smile slowly creeping its way on his lips shortly after.

Soonyoung on the other hand was shocked at the over familiar tune. 'How..?'

As soon as Jihoon began to sing the first line, Soonyoung found himself in tears once again. "He isn't suppose to know this song.. Not in this timeline.. so how..?"

A hand rest on Soonyoung's head. "Some things are meant to be there and some things aren't."

Soonyoung stares at the male beside him. Unable to fit the puzzle to his mystery "...Jeonghan.. Who exactly are you? Now that I think about it, you're always... here."

Jeonghan placed a finger on Soonyoung's lips. "I'm just an acquaintance. Take care, Soonyoung." Jeonghan just took a step back and soon enough, he could no longer be seen.

Soonyoung was about to turn to find Jeonghan but he stopped when he heard his favorite line.

.....
You look at me and smile
You’re my miracle, it’s you

Soonyoung found himself smiling when he notices Jihoon's eyes on him. Soonyoung watch as the shorter male smiles throughout the song. 'If this is how it will end this time, I may not have much regret.'

---

Familiar walls. Familiar ceilings. A few clothes scattered on the floor. Soonyoung stares blankly at the walls infront of him. Soonyoung groggily got up from his bed and plants himself at his study table. Three stacks of old notebooks could be seen at the side. A few newer looking ones placed messily nearer to the centre. Soonyoung flipped open one of the notebook.

21 November 2019 +1717

The showcase is over. I won the bet! But maybe it doesn't really matter. The way things ended peacefully this time was what really matters. It doesn't matter at what age I woke up this time but, I'll see you again. 

PS Whoever you are, I'll be in your care again, Jeonghan.

Soonyoung smiles. He was about head down to the dining hall without even checking out the mirror first but his door swung open.

"Soon!! You didn't even tell me that you're going out today!!" Soonyoung's sister sighed when she saw her brother at the study table. "Ugh... You're not even dressed yet. Anyway, your friend is here so you better get ready soon." 

Soonyoung raised an eyebrow. "Friend? Who?" 

A head popped out from behind his sister. "That's mean. Don't we have a party today?" A familiar face. 

"Jeong..han?"

"Questions later. Lets get you ready. The rest are already on the way to the meet up spot."

Putting aside the confusion and all, Soonyoung quickly went to get himself ready. When he was faced infront of the mirror, his confusion grew. "Jeonghan. Just one question. What is the date today..?"

Jeonghan smiles. "What do you think?"

---

Left. Right. He knows all of this people in all the timeline he had went through. The same people as the first time. All except for one whom he have yet to see after the first. And that person had approached Soonyoung and Jeonghan. "I'm back." 

Jeonghan smiles. "Thank you.." He then glanced at the utterly confused male by his side. "I shall leave you both alone for now."

Soonyoung watched as Jeonghan leave. He then looked at the male opposite him. "Jisoo..?" The latter smiles.

"You looked confused!" Jisoo chuckled and ruffled his hair. "It's been hard but seeing things ended up like this, I guess we can finally take it easy."

"What do you mean?"

"Oh right! Well, you don't really have to understand." He smiles. "It's time for me to befriend everyone again so help me out, Hoshi!" Jisoo sling his arm around Soonyoung's neck.

"Ah... okay. So first...." Soonyoung make rounds with Jisoo as he introduced Jisoo to his friends and acquaintances.

After finishing introducing almost everyone to Jisoo, Soonyoung glanced at the corner of the room. He saw two males sitting around, laughing at their friends who were making a fool of themself.

"The one at that corner on the right is Seungcheol. He is uh.."

"Jeonghan's boyfriend?" A small smile as a short memory crossed Jisoo's mind .

Soonyoung rubbed the back of his nape. "Yeah. Jeonghan's boyfriend. And the one on the left-" Before Soonyoung could finish his sentence, Jisoo already dragged Soonyoung to the said corner. 

"As you were saying?" As if he were plotting something, Jisoo grinned.

The two male looked at Soonyoung and Jisoo in confusion. Their eyes eventually focused only on Soonyoung.

"Uh..." Soonyoung feels sweats forming on his forehead. "This is Jihoon. Uh.. Seungcheol's friend."

Jisoo smirked. "Just friends?"

"Yes-"

"No."

Three pairs of eyes are now on Jihoon. "No." Jihoon locked his eyes with Soonyoung. "He's not just a friend. He's the person I like." Jihoon mumbles.

Seungcheol and Soonyoung eyes widens. Words only able to stay at the tip of their tongue as they look at Jihoon shockingly. Unlike the other two, Jisoo smiles. Jihoon looked away, his cheeks slowly turning a light shade of pink.

Soonyoung cleared his throat. "A-Anyway, this is Jisoo, Jeonghan's friend."

"Hm? I have heard a lot about you from Jeonghan." Seungcheol looked at Jisoo. "Something about you going far away to get something done.."

Jisoo nods. "Yeah, that's about right. How about we move elsewhere and leave this two alone" Jisoo grinned. Seungcheol quickly took the hint and grinned. And they left.

"Ji..."

"Soonyoung." Jihoon locked his eyes into Soonyoung's eyes intensely. He reached his hand to Soonyoung's hair, brushing any stray hairs away from the face. "Uh.. are you surprised?"

Soonyoung was flustered. "Y-Yeah. But... you. How..?"

Jihoon smiled. "From your reaction, I guess you're finally out of the loop?" Soonyoung blinked. "You have a lot to tell me after this."

Soonyoung frowned. "Don't you hate me..?"

"Someone once told me to follow my heart at least once so I want to give that a try.. I don't know what happen in the other time but I'm going to try to fix things right." Jihoon wrapped his arms around Soonyoung, slowly leaning in to peck his cheeks. "Sorry for the wait. You're really strong. Seeing how you have to repeat this a thousand times." Jihoon smiled cheekily.

Soonyoung turns red from the sudden compliment. "Y-You... You changed drastically..! Just a few days ago, you hated me-.." Jihoon planted another kiss. "Jihoon..!" Soonyoung whines. 

"You know what, Soonie?" Jihoon took a step back as he removed his hand from the latter. "I do love you afterall. And I'm sorry for hurting you."

A smile slowly formed on Soonyoung. A single happy tear rolling down his cheeks. "I... I love you too, Hoonie!! Happy birthday!"