Work Text:
-- ectoBiologist [EB] began pestering turntechGodhead [TG] --
EB: i can’t sleep.
EB: hey do you think i should dye my hair?
EB: i think i’d look way better if my hair was black like yours.
EB: i know you’re up dave, your profile says you’re active.
TG: i was talking to rose
TG: why the hell do you want to dye your hair i thought the ‘hating your physical appearance’ half of this friendship was supposed to be on me
TG: youre stealing my role egbert
TG: what will become of me now
EB: your hair is so much cooler than mine! you look like a cool emo boy or something, and i just look like a ginger toddler! or that volleyball kid from that anime i see all over tumblr!
TG: what no its cute what the hell are you talking about
EB: cute like a baby!!!
EB: i look like a baby!!!
TG: what john no
TG: you look cute like
TG: never mind you look really badass ok dont dye your hair because you look like a tiny ginger baby
EB: so you agree that i look like a tiny ginger baby!
TG: dude no that’s not what i meant
TG: i meant youre the only person who thinks that you look really cool
TG: and whats wrong with the ginger volleyball guy hes my favorite tumblr character i dont know the name of
EB: he looks dumb!!!
TG: dude hes super fuckin cool i dont know what youre on about
TG: id totally go for him
TG: if i was gay
TG: which im not
TG: no homo id bang the ginger volleyball guy
EB: i don’t think you can no homo that dave.
TG: what?
TG: how is me saying id bang a guy not something i can no homo
EB: banging a dude is like the most homo thing you can do!
TG: not if were not wearing socks
EB: i can’t argue with that :/
EB: does ginger volleyball boy wear socks?
EB: i’ve never seen his feet.
TG: dude of course he does
TG: have you ever smelled gym shoes
TG: they stink
TG: if he doesnt wear socks then i take back everything i said about wanting to no homo bang him
EB: fair enough i guess.
EB: so what you’re saying is that i shouldn’t dye my hair because then i won’t look like an anime character you’d bang?
TG: what no haha what
TG: i dont wanna bang you egbert where did you get that idea
TG: haha
TG: anyways its late nite
-- turntechGodhead [TG] ceased pestering ectoBiologist [EB] --
EB: :?