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It was never a good sign when Ventus was waiting for him at the doorstep, his foot tapping an agitated rhythm and his arms crossed.
"Ah, Vanitas. You're home. Well, come inside." The polite way Ventus greeted him. The way his eyes bore through Vanitas's back. The way he slammed the door shut. Oh, Vanitas knew he was in trouble. Even though he couldn't quite think of a why - he didn't remember doing something Ven would be upset about.
Ventus sat down on their dining table and signaled Vanitas to sit down in front of him, which Vanitas did. There was a second of silence.
"Did you take the cookies from my cookie jar, Vanitas?" Vanitas blinked.
"...no."
"Stop lying! I have a witness!" Ventus cried and pointed at their cat, who meowed as if she agreed. Vanitas was still mad Ventus didn't let him name her flood. He was also convinced that that was the sole reason the cat liked Ventus more.
"I left at about 7:30 a.m. for the prosecutors' office. Because I opened the jar to take a cookie out, I clearly saw that the cookies were still in there back then. But once I got home today at about 4 pm, all of them were gone! And I know your day started at 2 pm because you were scheduled to meet a client there so you had plenty of time to take them all!"
Vanitas sighed. "Ventus, that's all conjecture. Just because I had the opportunity it doesn't mean I did it. You don't have any proof."
"I have a witness!" Ventus said again. "Look Chirithy, if Vanitas stole the cookies, meow right now!"
Chirithy meowed. Vanitas groaned. Damn corruption.
"That's all circumstantial evidence, Ventus. You could have trained the cat to meow on command. This isn't definite enough to prove me guilty," he drawled, smirking when Ventus seemed at a loss of words for a second.
"Your fingerprints are on it!" Ventus tried again.
"Don't be silly, Ventus. I live here. My fingerprints are bound to be on that. Plus, even if I did I don't think there's any kind of law that could punish me for taking things that are in our possession ."
Ventus glared. Oh, he really did. It was a glare that was usually reserved for trials and incompetent witnesses - Vanitas, having to deal with glares from all sides during his entire career was very used to it and not impressed.
"You should check the law book more often, Ventus. Theft, what you're trying to accuse me of right now, is the taking of another person's property or services without that person's permission or consent with the intent to deprive the rightful owner of it. However, if we both are rightful owners of those cookies, I obviously can't steal them. Do you want me to go through the civil law code to prove that I'm a rightful owner too?"
Finally, Ventus slumped with defeat. "Why are you so good at this…"
"It's my job," Vanitas answered with a smirk, to which Ven groaned again.
"It's mine too, Vanitas! Maybe dating you was a mistake. I keep losing all of the arguments! At home and in court!" He murmured, burying his face in his hands. Vanitas only barked out some laughter.
"What, can't handle a defeat, Venty-Wenty?" He taunted. Ventus glared, but because he also looked so done, it looked more like he was sulking.
"A defeat? A DEFEAT? Ever since I met you I've had nothing but defeats! My court record… ruined. My cookies...gone!" Vanitas hesitated. His boyfriend genuinely looked upset and he feared that the wrong words would irritate Ventus even further.
Instead of continuing to taunt him, Vanitas finally chose to sit down in a chair next to Ven, his hand gently grasping Ven's. He didn't pull away.
"You had a bad day?" Vanitas asked softly.
Ventus shook his head.
"What's going on? You can tell me."
The blond let out a shuddering sigh. "I, I don't know. I just didn't feel that great all day and I was really looking forward to just relaxing and eating cookies… and when they were gone I just snapped. I shouldn't have taken it out on you. I'm sorry."
"I was kind of a dick too," Vanitas tried to amend, knowing Ventus would understand that was as close as it would get to an apology. And judging by the other's expression - a slight smile, one that never failed to warm Vanitas's heart - he did.
"I like watching you defend. You're so cool and fierce. You don't let anyone tell you any bs. You don't get scared," Ventus mumbled, standing up and ditching his chair for Vanitas's lap, choosing to separate their hands to wrap his own around Vanitas's neck and resting his head on the other's shoulder. "I wish I was more like you."
"Don't be stupid, Ven," Vanitas answered, his hand softly brushing through Ventus's hair. Ventus sighed in the embrace. "You're perfect the way you are. You always pay attention to every single word, every single detail. The participants' emotions. You find new solutions nobody has thought about ever. You're fair, not lenient, not harsh. The reason your record isn't that good is simply that you don't try to win, but you try to find the truth and punish the people that really deserve it. You're so, so good at what you do. Better than my bluffing and clueless ass could ever be."
Ventus giggled. "That was so cheesy."
Vanitas tried to ignore the heat rushing to his face. "I'll never say something nice to you ever again."
"We both know that's a lie," Ventus said lightly. His bright smile was back and Vanitas was so glad. The silence between them was comfortable, yet Ventus kept shifting around restlessly, irritating Vanitas to no end.
"What's eating you now," Vanitas asked with an eye roll and Ventus glanced over at the still empty cookie jar, pouting. God, he was so easy to read.
"I'll buy you new ones tomorrow," Vanitas sighed and as he predicted, Ventus's eyes lightened up with joy.
"Really?" He asked with almost childlike glee and Vanitas couldn't help but smile at his antics.
"Yeah yeah. I'll get some after I met my client tomorrow." Vanitas was simply addicted to seeing Ventus happy like this.
---
It was in the middle of the night when Vanitas woke, the presence next to him in bed glaringly empty. Shortly, he wondered where Ven could have gone, but he quickly decided he was either on the toilet or was getting himself something to drink - Vanitas hoped it was the latter as he also craved some sort of hot drink. He hoped they would drink hot chocolate together while cuddling, though he would never actually admit that.
Setting both feet in the ground he wobbled to the door, opening it slowly. Immediately, he was greeted by fur around his bare legs and a soft meow. "Ventus won't feed you and now you come to or what," he hissed at the cat, but couldn't keep his amusement out of his voice. Chirithy was not impressed with his hissing and continued to wrap around his legs, constantly meowing.
"God, okay okay, fine. I'll give you some treats," Vanitas cursed and the cat meowed as if she appreciated. Together, they walked to the kitchen - or in Vanitas's case, stumbling was the right word - and Vanitas pushed the door open and flickered the light on, having to blink several times to understand the scene in front of him.
Ventus, his arm half-hidden in the cookie jar, was staring back at him with wide eyes. Even though he seemed shocked, his jaw didn't stop chewing whatever was in his mouth, making a crunchy sound in the otherwise deadly silent room. Both his mouth and his fingers were covered in crumbs.
Chirithy meowed. "You're seeing this too, right?" Vanitas asked the cat, dumbfounded. She just meowed again.
"...uhm, this isn't what it looks like?" Ventus tried but Vanitas had already pointed an accusing finger at him.
"YOU'RE THE COOKIE THIEF!"
Ventus laughed nervously. "Don't be silly Vanitas, did you forget about your own words? I can't be a thief if I steal my own stuff-"
"I HAVE A WITNESS!" Vanitas continued to shout, finger moving to point at the cat. Chirithy meowed loudly, apparently trying to match Vanitas's voice.
Ventus sighed but he failed to hide his amusement. "Okay okay. You caught me."
"So this whole thing was an act?" Vanitas asked, incredulous. "Why. No seriously- WHY? You wanted to make fun of my awful cheering up skills? Laugh with your friends about my cheesy words? Where's the hidden camera?"
Ventus shook his head rapidly. "No, no! Those weren't my intention, I swear! I just wanted to-"
"You just wanted to have me buy new cookies for you," Vanitas said in a daze, finally counting one and one together. Ventus smiled sheepishly.
"You pretended to feel awful and to have a bad day, only for me to feel bad, cheer you up and buy you new cookies?"
Ventus nodded slowly. He looked worried. "Are you mad?"
There was a short second of silence.
"I fucking love you. Marry me right now."
"wat."