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Lan Xichen would not consider himself all knowing on the subject of cats. He’s only had his cat, Li Mei, for a couple years. He still finds himself writing Jiang Cheng about him frequently, ensuring that his cat was in the best of health (and that his tendency to stick his entire face into whatever pot of tea his uncle was about to drink wasn’t too bad for the sweet boy). He knows enough about the cats, though, to give Baishen and Huan a smile when they wander into his office. The two cats are nearly as inseparable as their masters and seem to consider Lan Zhan’s bunnies their kittens, which has led to several adorable scenes in Cloud Recesses.
The only thing surprising about Baishen and Huan coming to visit them is that Wei Ying and Lan Zhan are not immediately on their heels. A second look to the cats reveals that they’ve got ribbons in their mouth. Baishen has a blue one and Huan has a vivid red one.
Oh. Xichen smiles at them as they jump onto his desk. Huan walks right through the fresh ink, leaving a trail of kitty prints down the document Xichen was writing (it’ll be fine, Xichen knows. The document is for the Unclean Realms. Even Nie Mingjue is quite fond of the Yunmeng Jiang cats, though his sworn brother swears it’s because for all that Zhi is a spoiled princess, she can rip the throat out of a full grown cultivator and look cute while doing it. Xichen takes his sworn brother’s words with a grain of salt because on the few occasions Xichen has met Zhi, she’s been content to drape herself over Xichen or Jiang Cheng’s laps and purr herself up a storm.)
“Baishen, Huan,” Lan Xichen greets the cats, “what can I do for you today?” Huan drops the red ribbon from his mouth, careful not to get any ink on it, and nudges it towards Xichen. He picks it up, inspecting it and confirming what he had suspected- that it’s Wei Ying’s hair ribbon. The blue Lan ribbon that Lan Zhan had tied around Huan’s neck when the cat had first followed them home is gone. Xichen strongly suspects that is Baishen’s current treasure.
Huan sits on his back paws and gives Xichen a look. Not for the first time, he wishes he had the ability to understand cats’ body language as well as a Yunmeng Jiang...if only Jaing Cheng was here…Unfortunately, Jiang Cheng is quite busy these days, so Xichen will just have to figure this out on his own.
“What would you like me to do with this?” Xichen asks Huan. Baishen practically rolls her eyes, also getting up her hind paws and nuzzling Huan’s neck. Xichen carefully loops the ribbon around Huan’s neck before tying it off, giving him a new collar. It looks quite striking against his black fur and Xichen mentally compliments the cats for figuring it out before their oblivious owners. Baishen also drops her ribbon and it hits the wooden table with a faint clink, confirming that yes, it’s the ribbon Huan was originally given by Lan Zhan. Xichen doesn’t even know how the black cat got it off. Xichen takes this ribbon and ties it around Baishen’s neck in a similar style to Huan. For his efforts, he gets an affectionate nip on his fingers and then gets to watch as the two cats rub up against each other and purr loud enough to wake the sleeping Li Mei in Xichen’s lap. He gives them both an unimpressed look before going back to napping and Xichen smiles as the two cats leave together, tails twining together.
They’re barely out the door before Qiren tears open Xichen’s front door, which had previously only been propped open enough for the cats to enter and leave.
Lan Qiren paces in front of Xichen’s desk and he goes back to writing his letter to Nie Mingjue. Uncle will speak when he’s ready.
“Did you see them?” Qiren suddenly declares harshly and Lan Xichen understands why he waited before speaking. It would hardly do for Lan Qiren to break the rule about shouting, especially since he’d given Wei Wuxian hell for it earlier today.
“You will have to be more specific, Uncle,” Lan Xichen says softly, “I have seen everyone from Meng Yao to the newest Lan disciples today.”
Lan Qiren’s jaw clenches and Lan Xichen makes a mental note to request Jiang Cheng send Wen Qing their way- his uncle’s temper could be causing heart problems. “The cats.” Qiren spits. “They’re shameless.”
Xichen hides his smile as he takes a careful sip of tea. Obviously, Huan and Baishen are showing off their ribbons. “They are cats, Uncle,” Lan Xichen points out, “I don’t think they can be shameless.” Oh, they certainly can if Huan has proved anything to Lan Xichen. He doesn’t know why such a wild cat chose Lan Zhan, but he’s beginning to suspect they know all about his brother’s affection for the third Jiang sibling.
“You didn’t see their smug little faces,” Qiren insists. “That damned white ghost of Wei Wuxian’s is flaunting a Lan ribbon! Where did he even get it?”
From Huan, though Xichen knows better than to actually say that. “Baishen is a girl, Uncle.” Lans are not supposed to lie, but the rules say nothing about redirecting.
“No, they’re a menace.” Qiren nearly flings himself at the cushion across the desk from Xichen. Xichen took another sip of tea, knowing not to point out that Baishen had never broken a single Lan rule, unlike Huan who seemed to be breaking as many as a cat could. “I bet they’re the reason Huan is such a menace.”
Xichen thinks Huan is just born like that and gets delight from watching many Lans freak out from his antics. “Would you like tea?” He asks his uncle instead of voicing any of these thoughts. Lan Qiren nods and Lan Xichen wonders how soon Lan Zhan and Wei Wuxian will figure it out...then again, Lan Zhan has already bound his and Wuxian’s hands together, yet never told the third Jiang what that meant. Perhaps he should have a talk with Lan Zhan (and probably Huan too) about stealth marrying people…
But in the meantime, best to make sure his uncle doesn’t actually have a heart attack. Lan Zhan would want the man who raised him to be there at the wedding.