Chapter Text
Shen Qingqiu is dying.
Good thing that, because if he wasn’t currently certain his embarrassment will end him any minute now, he would have gratefully handed over the job of dying to Airplane-bro.
His most impregnable mask on and his fan on top of it, Shen Qingqiu is trying not to have a panic attack in the middle of the unprecedented diplomatic meeting he’s taking part of.
Red eyes burning into his, black hair brushing over his face with every thrust, back tense with restrained strength under his sweaty palms-
Heart in his throat, Shen Qingqiu tears his eyes away from the fucking protagonist, Airplane-bro what the hell, that wasn’t in the book!, and resolves to leave the sect as soon as possible. He had planned to skip his part in the plot from the very moment he woke up as Shen Qingqiu, cockblock extraordinaire, anyway. He’ll just be more direct about it.
But for now, he has to stay calm and not disturb the negotiations between the demon realm and the representatives of all major sects. The last thing he wants is to attract Luo Binghe’s attention. Maybe if he remains very, very quiet, the prince won’t notice him.
Ha! As if Shen Qingqiu ever was this lucky! Luo Binghe spotted him alright. The protagonist’s gaze is so heavy Shen Qingqiu is this close to flinching under it.
Shen Qingqiu needs to escape yesterday.
Sadly, he very much doubts he’ll be allowed away from the sect. Considering Cang Qiong Sect is currently hosting every single person of renown from the cultivation world, his absence would definitely be noted and frowned upon.
He’ll just have to shield himself. Shen Qingqiu will bring Ning Yingying with him tomorrow. Surely if Luo Binghe is presented with half of his famous love triangle, he’ll forget Shen Qingqiu ever existed? Who would give him a second glance when Ning Yingying is around? He’ll just speed up the plot a little, what’s wrong with that? If Airplane-bro wanted things to run smoothly, all he had to do was not include outrageous plot devices that showed up when all respectable people wanted to do was hunt an escaped demon that was ravaging the countryside!
And if that doesn’t work, he’ll find a way to drag Liu Mingyan along! Let’s see the protagonist resist the romantic urges that had caused the year’s greatest ship war for three consecutive years! Never mind the fact that when Shen Qingqiu had died back in his original world, Luo Binghe had had multiple children with each of them and still hadn’t picked one as his wife yet. This time, Shen Qingqiu would set him straight! He wouldn’t let him turn his disciple into a dishonoured woman!
Or at least that had been his plan: keep Ning Yingying as far as possible from the fateful meeting where the prince of the demon world met the first woman who was interested in him, not his status, his power or his wealth. Leave the field wide open for Liu Mingyan when she would show up two weeks later.
The plan has now changed. Shen Qingqiu must save himself first. Who is he to stand in the way of love? Ning Yingying is an adult; she can take care of her own romantic life. Shen Qingqiu has no interest in interfering in her romance to secure her for himself the way the original goods had, only to end up securing for himself instead a painful death at the hands of her chosen lover.
“Shen Qingqiu, I believe it was?”
Shen Qingqiu feels every hair on his body rise as he freezes.
A moment later, he turns toward the voice he heard only once. (Once was enough! Once had been more than enough! He’d never wanted to hear that voice again!) “Prince Binghe.”
The smile on Luo Binghe’s (far too perfect) handsome face is too wicked by half to be proper.
Shen Qingqiu hides behind his fan and wishes the ground would swallow him right now, thanks. Why doesn’t that plot device exist, Airplane Shooting Towards the Sky!?
“Would Peak Lord Shen grant me a few moments of his time? I have a matter to discuss I’m certain he would be interested in.”
Nope nope nope Luo Binghe is wrong. Shen Qingqiu has no interest in whatever matter he’s going to bring up, none whatsoever. “Prince Binghe must forgive me, but I am expected on Qing Jing Peak. As the sect master is the official representative of Cang Qiong Sect, you should address any concern to him.”
“I do not believe Yue Qingyuan would enjoy the topic in question, but surely Peak Lord Shen would know better.”
Did Shen Qingqiu express how much he wanted to die lately? Way to dig your own grave. At this moment, Luo Binghe talking to Yue Qingyuan is the very last thing he wants to happen. The sect master will build him a tower, set him up in the highest room and never let him out if he learns.
“Fine. If Prince Binghe can give me some time, I will have a room prepared for a more private meeting.”
“Of course.”
Shen Qingqiu starts in the direction of the Qiong Ding Peak disciple in charge of room allocation, before taking a wrong turn and escaping back to Qing Jing Peak.
Sucker! Like Shen Qingqiu will just let Luo Binghe, famous for breaking hearts all over the demon realm and yet never settling down, trap him into an isolated room all by himself? Fuck off. Shen Qingqiu is leaving Cang Qiong Sect and that’s final. He’ll bullshit something for Yue Qingyuan when he returns, in what, two months? The delegations should have returned to where they came from by then.
Except when he arrives, Ming Fan informs him that Shang Qinghua is waiting for him in his bamboo house.
That’s not good.
Shen Qingqiu enters the house carefully, half-hoping the worst writer in the universe won’t be sitting down at his table, nervously drinking his body’s weight in Shen Qingqiu’s carefully picked tea.
Sadly, he does not get his wish. “Bro, what did Luo Binghe want with you?”
Shen Qingqiu is going to cry. Any minute now. “Why would the protagonist want to know about me?”
“I don’t know, that’s why I’m asking! My king asked me about you for his sake, so there’s something going on.”
Too fast! Way too fast! Did Luo Binghe ask Mobei-Jun to get information about him during the morning break? Why does he even care! “I don’t wanna talk about it.”
“So there is something! C’mon, Bro, tell me!”
“No.”
“Bro!”
“Never.”
“Bro!”
“I said no.”
“Last chance before I tell Yue Qingyuan demons have a special interest in you.”
Shen Qingqiu blanches. “You wouldn’t dare.”
“Watch me.”
“I hate you so much.”
“I know. Talk anyway.”
This day suuuuuucks. “Do you remember when I took a few disciples to a village because people were going missing a few months ago?”
“Nope, but continue.”
“We found half-eaten carcasses around the village. Whatever did it was above the disciples’ pay grade, so I left them behind and went hunting by myself.”
“Okay, so?”
“So I found the thing that wasn’t in the book by the way and started beating it up, only to be joined by some demon.”
“Some demon.”
“Yes.”
“Who just jumped in to help.”
“Well, he jumped in to kill the thing I was hunting, but same difference.”
“That didn’t strike you as odd?”
“A demon killing shit? Not really.”
“And that was Luo Binghe, right? It must have been, considering how the plot is unfolding right now.”
“Stop calling my life the plot! And it was, okay!? I didn’t realise at the time! I was busy not dying!”
“Okay, so you’ve met before. He cares now because?”
Shen Qingqiu blushes. He can’t believe he’s going to say this. “When the thing finally died, its… chest thing… opened and a bunch of spores flew into our faces.”
“Spores? Why would… Dude. Dude. Dude did you get sex pollened with Luo Binghe? Oh my god did you get fucked by my son!?”
Shen Qingqiu is currently planning his own funeral. Something tasteful, maybe a couple disciples crying on the side. “You’re the one that wrote a protagonist that can’t take three steps without getting involved in a situation that demands papapa! It’s not my fault I got caught into it! If I had known Luo Binghe was going to be there, I’d have let him handle it.” The protagonist did not need the help of an average peak lord to defeat a rabid demon.
“…So, was it good?”
Shen Qingqiu chokes. “Shang Qinghua!”
“It was, right? My son knows his stuff.”
“…Please don’t call him your son in that context. It’s gross.”
“But it was?”
“I’m not talking to you about this.”
“Why not? You complained about my sex scenes all the time. Why not this one?”
Shen Qingqiu refuses to dignify that with an answer.
“It must have been if he’s looking for you. Way to go, Bro! Ready for a second round?”
“No!! Don’t you remember your own book! He’s meeting Ning Yingying soon! And Liu Mingyan after! I won’t be getting involved.”
“Oh, right. Well, you had your turn. That’s not so bad.”
“I didn’t want it!”
Shen Qingqiu is deeply wounded by Shang Qinghua’s doubtful look. He really is. He’s secure enough in his masculinity to acknowledge that Luo Binghe is very attractive and that the sex hadn’t been bad, but he’d been drugged! Anyone would have rocked his world at the time! That doesn’t mean he’s looking for a repeat performance. “I really didn’t.”
“Sure, Bro. Whatever. Tell him that and move on, I guess.”
Shen Qingqiu had moved on, thank you, until this very unwelcome reminder! “I’m not staying, so there’s no point.”
Shang Qinghua blinks dumbly. “You’re not staying?”
“No. I’m getting as far away as I can until he leaves. Don’t you remember he kills Shen Qingqiu? I don’t want to be around for that.”
“Well, the original Shen Qingqiu and the original Luo Binghe definitely hadn’t fucked, so we can safely say things have changed. Binghe doesn’t kill his conquests, so you should be fine.”
Shen Qingqiu chokes again, fan waving in the air desperately. “Not a conquest!”
“Sure you’re not. It’s not like what happened to you happened to, like, at least three dozen others.”
“Fuck you.”
“Thanks for the offer, but I’m not interested.”
Shen Qingqiu hates his life.
“Anyway, you can’t leave. It’d look really bad if you were the only missing peak lord. Also, Mobei-Jun would kill me for having caused you to escape.”
“You had nothing to do with it.”
Shang Qinghua shudders. “Try telling him that and see where that takes you.”
Shen Qingqiu remembers that Shang Qinghua also has his own issues to deal with.
At least the demon lord he’s involved with 100% does not want to fuck him, so advantage: Shang Qinghua.
As much as he resents his fellow transmigrator for being the cause of this hell he’s trapped in, he doesn’t wish on him the original's fate, killed by his master when his use expired. Whatever happens with Luo Binghe, at least Shen Qingqiu will probably survive it.
Well, he’s going to die, but of embarrassment. It shouldn’t be too lethal in the long term. “Fine. I'll stay, but just know you owe me more than you could ever hope to repay.”
“Thanks Bro.”
So, to summarise: Shen Qingqiu is fucked.