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Not even on the couch, to add to his indignity. He'd sat down on the floor to be stubborn, and Deidara had simply wrapped himself around him to keep him there. So Sasori watched his first two episodes with his back to Deidara's chest and the blond's snorts of laughter in his ear. There were worse ways to spend his free time. 

But while he had resigned himself to placidly enjoying his boyfriend's company and semi-politely watching the show, he'd found himself genuinely amused. He hadn't taken Deidara seriously when he'd declared that he would "absolutely love it". Joke was on him. 

He didn't absolutely love it, but he didn't hate it, which meant it was leaps and bounds ahead of Deidara's usual taste in entertainment. Then again, Deidara was a broad consumer of media; he'd watch or read or play just about anything. Sasori had particular tastes and he clung to them. But he should've given him more credit. It wasn't as if he was completely clueless about those particular tastes. 

But a comedy about four aged women would not have been his first guess to replace their marathoning of the X-Files. He supposed that was just the sort of chaotic neutrality that Deidara brought into his life. 

-.-.-

The second time they watched it, Sasori suggested it. A hard day at work (combined with a quiet need for physical touch) prompted him, and Deidara only grinned and stashed his 3ds. "This time, the couch. And no more skipping around." 

"You want to watch them in order? There's not really a plot, yeah?" 

"I'm sure there's enough continuity that would make it worthwhile," Sasori maintained stubbornly. He pushed Deidara back onto the couch, stooped to grab the cat, and just as stubbornly laid down next to him. 

"I'm gonna have to get back up to grab the laptop, you know." 

Sasori leaned forward just enough to let Deidara slither over the back. Astarte meowed in complaint. 

"You're usually not this snuggly. Something happen?" he asked as he began the search for his computer. 

"It's underneath the desk, on the chair. And no, nothing in particular." 

The blond came back with a laptop held triumphantly overhead. It was a wonder he didn't drop it more often with how he waved it around. "So, a night full of snuggles and Golden Girls. Do you feel guilty for something?" 

"No. What would I feel guilty for?" Sasori asked, squinting at him. He did not feel guilt and didn't like the accusation that sometimes he did. 

"Just trying to figure out why you're acting weird."

"It's not weird that I want to spend time with you. To watch things or cuddle," he grumbled as Astarte, unhappy that there were still things going on she was not part of, slunk out of his grasp. She give Deidara's fingers a perfunctory bat and then tried to reach her true goal: she wedged herself in between his fingers and the screen, sprawling across it with a happy purr. 

"You're making it really hard to type. And don't mind me, yeah, I don't mean to look a gift horse in the mouth."

"It's not such a rarity," Sasori said, still perturbed. "I like spending time with you, unless you're doubting that for some reason?" 

"Nope!" Deidara replied cheerily. He finished with the laptop, hooked it up to the television, and pulled the cat off of the keyboard. Dropping her into Sasori's arms again, he tried to clamber back over to his spot behind him. Which meant he got halfway and then laid on top of both boyfriend and cat. But at least he'd hit play. 

Sasori wanted the physicality too much to shove him off. Deidara waited about two seconds before taking it as willing squishing and snuggled in impossibly deeper with a happy sound. The redhead liked it significantly less then.

"Your hair is in my eyes." 

"Well your bony shoulder is in my sternum, so we're even," he said, even as he swiped his out of the way. Sasori shifted, and Deidara flopped off of him. Astarte made a break for it. Spooning somewhat more comfortably, Deidara wrapped his arms around Sasori and pressed his mouth against his neck with a happy little sound. 

Sasori snorted at one of the deadpan jokes and Deidara laughed. Probably at him. 

-.-.-

The third time they watched the show together, Sasori put it all together. He'd admitted to himself that he enjoyed it. 

Deidara hadn't had a fun day - a fight at work and then a downpour on the way home - and since he didn't want to talk about it, Sasori's how-to-soothe-the-boyfriend options were limited. "Well, stop pouting about it. Get out of those wet clothes and go take a shower. I'll put on some tea." 

Grumbling and peeling off wet clothes the entire way to the bathroom, at least he did as told. Astarte batted at his soaked hoodie and then mewled at Sasori, complaining about her damp paw. 

"Two drama queens. Perfect." He picked her up, let her curl around his shoulders, and scooted all of Deidara's wet clothes into a pile in the corner. He could take care of it later. He put on the kettle, grumped privately about having to stand on a chair to get to the top shelf, and presented Deidara with a mug of his favorite by the time he got out of the shower. 

"You should pamper me more often, yeah? I don't want a shitty day to be the only time I get your attention like this." There was still a faint edge to his voice, not at all kind. Sasori ignored it and nudged the cat off, then wrapped his arms around him. Deidara tensed momentarily at the contact. 

"If your idea of pampering is ordering you to bathe and then get you a cup of tea -" 

"Well I wouldn't have said no to some company in the shower -" 

"Not fucking you while you're in a sour mood. You get too bitey." Moment broken, Sasori maneuvered him around and gave him a push towards the living room. 

Deidara stuck his tongue out over his shoulder. "You don't normally complain, dude."

"Okay, you get bitey in more visible places. I don't work in as unprofessional an environment as you." 

"You just have a bunch of unfun douches as coworkers." 

Sasori threw a blanket over him and sat down next to him. Deidara promptly stole it all, nearly spilled his tea on the cat, and also stole Sasori's lap as his pillow. "More Golden Girls? We're halfway through season one," he asked and ran his fingers through his still-wet hair. 

"More pampering?" 

"I've come to enjoy it." 

Deidara smiled for the first time since he got home, although he shifted to try to hide it from him. "Fuckin' knew it. See, I know your tastes, dude. And the way you and Kabuto go on, I knew you had to like the sassy, snarky sort of humor." 

"You do know me," he agreed as the episode started. 

"It'll be our little secret, promise, yeah? I wouldn't want to hurt your poor, precious pride. Or do you think I'm that mean?" he asked with a fake pout, but there was humor in his voice again. Sasori wondered why he even bothered with the tea if it would have been this easy to get him in higher spirits again. 

"You're mean enough to soak through my pants with your hair, so probably. And besides, I know you, too, and I know you'll jealously guard the little 'Sasori-likes-Golden-Girls' secret." He liked hoarding tiny little things. 

Astarte jumped down from the back of the couch and wedged herself in between the arm and Sasori's leg, and then began to lick the moisture out of Deidara's hair. He drew back with a scowl. "Not this time, Izzy-kitty." 

She meowed at him in demand. 

"She's not hurting your hair." 

"She's not hurting you, either, when she wakes you up at four in the morning." 

"Astarte, down." Mercifully, the cat slunk off with a dark look for them both. Deidara nestled back into his spot, even if the brief reprieve let Sasori know just how uncomfortable wet jeans were. 

-.-.-

After that, it became a mix of comfort for foul moods and a pleasant prelude to wine nights. (Well, wine for him. Deidara only drank significant amounts of it for important occasions. Deidara's love of shitty American beer was one habit he could not break, try as he might.) It didn't have the plot past marathons had, nor was it something he liked to have on in the background. They just had to sit and watch it. 

He probably would continue distrusting Deidara's sense of humor for awhile, since it often involved pranks and fire and internet memes and sometimes Kakashi, but at least he could agree that watching something funny with him was enjoyable. And Astarte only fell asleep on the keyboard half the time, which meant she probably liked it too. (Or probably liked the cuddle time it gave her.) 

It was incredibly strange to think of a cuddly cat, a cuddlier blond, and an old sitcom as homey, but there it was. He should just learn to expect Deidara to insert strangeness into his life and make him run with it.