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Lan Xichen doesn’t mean to snoop, really, he doesn’t. He’s tidying up, like he always does on Saturdays, and of course he’s also tidying up in their office at home.
Which Meng Yao knows.
So he must have meant for Lan Xichen to find the letter, it’s the only explanation there is.
He meant for Lan Xichen to find it, because Meng Yao doesn’t know how to tell him about it.
Lan Xichen thinks it’s fair, given that the letter demands their immediate break-up. He wouldn’t know how to tell Meng Yao about that either, but then again, they are very different.
He cleans around the letter, doesn’t even dare touch it, and when Meng Yao finally comes home, Lan Xichen is sitting on their couch, wondering if he’ll have to move or if Meng Yao will. It’s not a pleasant thought, that, and if he’s being honest, he doesn’t want to spend a single second alone in this apartment.
This was supposed to be their home.
“Congratulations,” Lan Xichen says as soon as Meng Yao steps into the living-room and Meng Yao frowns at him.
“For what?” he wants to know, but still comes over to sit in Lan Xichen’s lap and kiss him.
Lan Xichen is torn between pushing him away, and clinging to him, to never let him go.
“Your father finally wants to acknowledge you, give you a position in the company,” Lan Xichen answers, and he keeps his voice deliberately even.
The only demand Jin Guangshan had in return for that, was that Meng Yao, soon to be Jin Guangyao, would break up with Lan Xichen immediately.
Apparently he wasn’t good for the reputation of the Jin Company. Which was understandable, given that Lan Xichen had rejected the position as CEO in his family’s company and instead decided to be a musician and artist. He was doing well, in both regards, but of course it didn’t have the prestige the position of a CEO would bring.
Lan Xichen faintly wonders if it’s too late to take that position back. Maybe that will change Jin Guangshan’s stance, and allow Lan Xichen to stay with Meng Yao.
“Xichen,” Meng Yao sighs and he doesn’t tense in Lan Xichen’s arms which, really, could mean all kinds of different things. “Did you not look at the date that letter was sent?” Meng Yao asks and Lan Xichen has to shake his head.
His mind had been otherwise occupied.
“It’s been weeks now,” Meng Yao tells him and gets up.
Lan Xichen wants to stop him, wants to tug him back down, but Meng Yao is walking away from him, into the office.
Weeks, he had said. Weeks where the outcome of their relationship must have been more than clear for Meng Yao already, and yet he still stood by Lan Xichen’s side like nothing at all was wrong.
Lan Xichen bites down on a bitter laugh.
When Meng Yao comes back out of his office, he’s holding two letters in his hands.
“Look at the date,” he demands of Lan Xichen and shoves the already familiar and so very hated letter in his hands.
It’s dated almost two months back. Two months, where Meng Yao already knew that he was going to end this.
“And now stop whatever it is you’re thinking and read this letter,” Meng Yao says while he flicks Lan Xichen’s forehead and changes the letters in his hands.
This one, it’s addressed to Jin Guangshan, from Meng Yao, and it was written just one day after the other letter.
It was a very polite ‘Fuck off, and how dare you even’ letter.
“That—is borderline rude,” Lan Xichen says, because he cannot quite believe that Meng Yao would so thoroughly reject everything Jin Guangshan offered to him.
“It’s what he deserved,” Meng Yao gives back with a shrug and Lan Xichen frowns at him.
“But this,” he says and holds up the one from Jin Guangshan, “is everything you ever wanted.”
Meng Yao pauses for a second at that, but then he shrugs, snatching the letter out of Lan Xichen’s hands and crumples it up in his hands.
“Maybe it was, one time. But it no longer is,” Meng Yao tells him and points at the letter he wrote. “This is how I feel now.”
“You wrote you would never do this without me,” Lan Xichen mutters and reads that passage over again. “Either your father would accept me or he could shove his offer up his ass,” he says and he’s only slightly paraphrasing.
“And I mean it. Either I get to do this with you, or not at all. Unsurprisingly, he hasn’t deigned this letter with an answer, so I guess it’s pretty clear we’re doing the ‘not at all’ part.”
“You wanted this. You wanted his name, a job at the company. You wanted a family, a home, with them,” Lan Xichen says, even though he really, really doesn’t want to.
“Xichen, you’re my family now. You and your little band of family and friends. And my home is here, with you. You feel like home to me. I don’t need that bastard to acknowledge me, if I have you. And the only name I will ever take is yours if you finally get around to asking me to marry you,” Meng Yao almost flippantly adds and Lan Xichen stares at him in wonder.
Marriage. He hasn’t dared to think about that yet, but now there is only one thought in his head. Meng Yao, with his name, in the Lan Clan colours, and never before has Lan Xichen wanted something as much as this.
“I was so worried,” Lan Xichen whispers on a shaky breath, instead of voicing his desperate urge to ask Meng Yao to marry him then and there, and immediately Meng Yao slides into his lap again.
“Never,” he promises and peppers Lan Xichen’s face with kisses. “I would never just abandon you. I was about to throw that letter out but then Nie Mingjue barged in like he always so rudely does, and I forgot.”
“He has a key,” Lan Xichen reminds him as he slings his arms around Meng Yao’s middle. “You gave him that key.”
“Shut up, don’t remind me about that,” Meng Yao mutters and Lan Xichen hides his laughter in Meng Yao’s neck.
“You’re all I ever wanted,” Meng Yao whispers into his hair, and Lan Xichen topples them over onto the couch, to cuddle Meng Yao close.
“And you have me,” Lan Xichen promises him, because if he gets his will, he’ll never let Meng Yao go. “For as long as you want.”
At that, Meng Yao pulls away from him to search Lan Xichen’s face.
“You better watch what you say,” he warns him. “It could be a really long time.”
“That’s fine by me,” Lan Xichen immediately replies, because it is.
“I love you,” Meng Yao says, whispers it into the space between them and Lan Xichen gives him a slow, soft kiss.
“I love you, too,” he replies and then just snuggles close.
They had plans for tonight, and Nie Mingjue will use the key he has to eventually drag them out if they don’t show up, but for now this is everything they both need.