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When We're Underneath The Lights My Heart's No Longer Broken

Summary:

“I think the universe is trying to tell us something,” he muttered, his cheeks red as he glanced back up at EJ. And really, Ricky didn’t like what the universe had to say at all.

Notes:

(See the end of the work for notes.)

Work Text:

Ricky was confused. And that put it mildly.

They had entered tech week last Monday, which apparently meant little to no sleep, the changing of scenes last minute, and people freaking out over their roles and the quality of their acting and singing. So, basically how Ricky had been feeling ever since he had gotten himself into this whole thing.

What had him confused, however, wasn’t all of that. It was the fact that EJ and him barely got to talk, there were fleeting glances during rehearsals here and there, and yet EJ sent him a text every night that read Sleep well, :)

It was probably a well-intended gesture, but it sent Ricky’s mind into a frenzy. He barely got any sleep as it was, and with EJ on his mind, sleep seemed to be entirely out of reach most nights.

Ricky kept rewinding back to that moment in the car, when they had been close enough to touch, close enough to kiss even, and this time it hadn’t been acting. It simply couldn’t have been. EJ had wanted to kiss him, and the thought of that made him blush furiously. It also didn’t help that the same thing happened whenever he came across that damn emotional support hamster.

EJ hadn’t tried to talk to him though. Not outside those texts at night anyway, and Ricky wasn’t sure how he was supposed to approach the whole thing ( déjà vu much? ). Besides, they were all busy with rehearsals, and the last thing he wanted was to ruin the musical for Nini, just because he’d caught feelings for EJ somehow.

It was simultaneously the weirdest thing, and the most normal thing, to think about these days. EJ was honestly the last person he would have expected to fall for, but then again that was probably due to their misguided first meeting, and the fact that they had both been involved with Nini.

And now we’re involved with each other. Somehow. Ricky thought, shaking his head as he stared at the ceiling, the buzzing of his phone eventually getting his attention. He didn’t even have to check the screen to know who had texted him.

-

Opening Night was a bit if a blur.

Ricky had been meaning to talk to EJ, but he’d never really been given the chance to. Kourtney wanted to do some last-minute costume checkups, Nini thought doing a warmup together would help them get into character, and somehow Ricky began to understand Troy Bolton, and him being torn between so many things, a lot more. He barely caught a glimpse of EJ before they had to go on stage, and maybe he’d just have to wait to talk to him until this was all over.

Their shoulders were bumping against each other as they stood in the wings, waiting for the lights to go down.

“Break a leg,” EJ whispered, and even though Ricky could see Nini on the other side of the stage, waiting for her own entrance, all of his attention was focused on EJ’s warmth next to him.

“Yeah. You too.”

-

Being on stage felt strangely liberating, Ricky had to admit that. Things were also going pretty well during the first act. That was, however, until he was suspended in the air, catching a glimpse of his mother with another man. He instantly knew who he was, the guy he’d talked to on the phone briefly, and for a minute Ricky didn’t just forget to sing, he also had to remind himself to breathe.

The rest of the performance was a blur, but he assumed people probably didn’t think anything of it, because Troy’s head wasn’t in the game, like the song suggested.

The problem was: Ricky couldn’t bring himself to calm down. His thoughts were going 100 miles per hour, and Nini wasn’t available for a pep talk, because she had problems of her own.

Why on earth had he ever thought he’d be able to do this? Play the lead role in a musical without having any prior experience? Who in their right mind had thought giving him this role was a good idea?

He couldn’t do this. Not just because of his mother, but also because of Nini. She was trying to get into this fancy acting school, and Ricky wasn’t the partner she needed for that.

Barging into the dressing room, while the last scenes of Act One were played out on stage, Ricky was breathing harshly as he tugged on his jersey and pulled it over his head, finding exactly who he’d been looking for.

“Ricky! What…” EJ’s smile immediately faltered, as he noticed the state the other boy was in, and he almost didn’t catch the jersey that had been thrown at him.

“You have to go on as Troy.”

The sentence hung in the air for a moment, and EJ simply frowned. “What? Why?”

A couple of weeks ago he would have given anything to hear that sentence, but now? How times had changed.

“I can’t do it, I…” Ricky was still panicking, so when two warm hands suddenly rested on his shoulders, he finally took a moment to breathe.

“Hey, look at me. What’s wrong?” EJ was forcing Ricky to look at him, and for a moment those eyes, and the worry that Ricky could see in them, actually calmed him down a little.

“I just…this was a stupid idea. My Mom’s out there, and she somehow thought today was the best way to introduce me to her new boyfriend, while I´m suspended twenty feet in the air.” He let out a frustrated sigh. “And then there’s this lady in the audience, from some fancy acting school Nini wants to go to. And I can’t be the reason she doesn’t get in.”

Ricky would have never forgiven himself if he ended up being the reason that Nini was denied her dreams. She had always been hardworking, writing her own songs, and going to that theatre camp had been a dream come true. If this lady wasn’t going to offer her a place, and Ricky was to blame? No, he wasn’t going to be standing in the way of her dreams. They might have not been a couple anymore, but they were still friends, great friends really, and Ricky knew that this was what Nini wanted.

“Look at me,” EJ’s voice pulled him from his spiraling thoughts again, and Ricky looked up, their eyes meeting. “You’re a great performer. Surely, there needs to be some polishing done, but that’s what school musical are for. It’s not supposed to be perfect, even though people have to reminded of that every now and then. Including me.” EJ let out a small chuckle. “Practice makes perfect. What these people are looking for? It’s talent, and that’s something you can’t fake. If this performance was perfect, then Nini wouldn’t need a place at that school.” He then continued. “And…I’m sorry about your Mom. She should have warned you, but I guess…at least she bothered to come?”

Ricky felt his heart drop at that, and suddenly he had the desire to just wrap his arms around the other boy. “Your parents didn’t show?”

EJ shrugged his shoulders. “It’s no big deal. Dad’s in Boston for work, and Mom’s at some charity event.”

Ricky shook his head, and before he could think about it, he had slid EJ’s hands off his shoulders and squeezed them in his own. “No, it’s a big deal, and I’m sorry.” For some reason his own worries seemed silly to him now.

Sure, his mother could have given him a warning, but maybe he’d been acting a little too harshly. She seemed happy, and maybe that was what mattered.

“Hey, I got something for you.” EJ eventually broke the silence, sliding his hands from Ricky’s. He immediately noticed the loss of warmth and contact, and almost complained, but then decided against it, because EJ began rummaging through his bag.

“I meant to give this to you before the show, but I couldn’t get a moment alone.”

Tell me about it, Ricky thought, but all thoughts immediately went out the window, when he found EJ looking back at him again, a small hamster plushy in his hands.

“I figured this one couldn’t die on you. I mean…unless you do get your Dad a dog, then I’d be careful. I heard they like to chew on things.”

EJ was smiling, and Ricky couldn’t quite help the laughter that bubbled up from his chest. He reached for the plushy, which felt soft in his hands, and his heart missed a beat.

“Do you like it?”

Ricky had seen EJ in different states over these past few days, but in that moment, he almost seemed vulnerable, and so open that it made Ricky’s stomach swoop.

“Yeah…it’s perfect.” He muttered, “Hold on a second.” Moving towards his own bag, Ricky pulled out a small box and eventually handed it to the other boy. He’d felt stupid for getting it, which was partly the reason he had kept it hidden, but now that EJ had given him a gift, Ricky felt less vulnerable about sharing his, too.

EJ’s lips were curved into a smile again as he opened the box, revealing a small, ladybug shaped keychain. “I figured this wouldn’t cause any trouble with the housekeeper,” he added, feeling his cheeks heating up slightly. Ricky wasn’t sure if he had ever blushed as much as he had during those few days being in such close proximity with EJ.

“It’s perfect,” EJ muttered, turning the small pendent over in his hands, as if it was the most precious thing he’d ever held.

The silence that fell over them after that was anything but awkward. Ricky could feel his own heartbeat in his chest, hands clutching the hamster plushy tightly.

“You’ll be great out there.” EJ eventually spoke, his voice quiet but sure, and Ricky didn’t say anything, just stepped forward into the other’s space. He wasn’t exactly small, but he still had to look up at EJ to catch his eyes again.

The other boy was willingly giving up his shot at playing the lead, something that would have been unthinkable just a few weeks ago. It meant that EJ cared more about Ricky than anyone had really known, including Ricky. So maybe it hadn’t been acting when they had sung together, and maybe EJ had wanted to kiss him too that day.

And maybe that spin the bottle game hadn’t just been about competition.

“I´m gonna…” He felt stupid to announce it, because both of them knew where this was headed. They were still getting lost in each other’s eyes, and EJ’s hand was brushing against his own, where Ricky felt his skin prickle from the touch.

“Yeah,” EJ breathed in return, the ghost of Ricky’s lips already on his, when Carlos’ voice rang through the silence.

“Ricky, you´re on in ten. Nini wants to go over a scene though, and I wouldn’t let her wait if I was you,”

Ricky very nearly dropped the plushy as he jumped back, resulting in him only holding on tighter.

“I think the universe is trying to tell us something,” he muttered, his cheeks red as he glanced back up at EJ. And really, Ricky didn’t like what the universe had to say at all.

“Come on, Nini’s waiting,” the other boy gave him an encouraging nod, his lips curled into a soft smile.

Sighing, Ricky resigned himself to the universe’s wishes. For now, at least.

Safely storing the plushy in his bag, he eventually turned back to EJ with a smile. “See you out there.” He nodded and was almost halfway out the door, when EJ called his name again.

“You wanna go dressed like that?” His lips were curved into a smirk, and Ricky barely managed to catch the jersey that was thrown his way.

Right.

He’s just had that entire conversation half naked.

Ricky was blushing so hard that he could feel the heat in his cheeks. It felt as if his entire face was on fire, and he could still heard EJ’s laugh echoing in his ears long after he’d left the room.

Notes:

I know, you all hate me. So do I to be honest!
I'm literally that meme where someone goes "NOW KISS!" I
promise they will. Some day. xD

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