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“But what if she doesn’t like me?” Jaune lamented, stopping and sitting at their table instead of working like he should have been.
“Don’t worry, she likes you,” Ren reassured him, jotting down something from his text book.
“But how do you know that?”
“I read her diary,” Nora shrugged, popping one of the complementary mini muffins into her mouth.
“You what?!” Jaune squaked, and winced when his tone drew the curious stares of nearby patrons. “You what?” he repeated, in an outraged whisper. “Why?”
“Well, she left it on her dresser when she went to track practice,” Nora explained to Jaune’s dumbfounded expression. “And Ren wasn’t around to stop me.” She said this like that explained everything, but it mostly just left Jaune gaping like a fish out of water.
“I am about ninety percent of Nora’s impulse control,” Ren reminded him, and plucked a mini muffin out of her hands without looking up from his book. “And no more muffins unless you don’t want to get pancakes for dinner.”
“Yes, Ren,” Nora sighed on reflex.
“Nora, you can’t just read your roommate’s diary!” Jaune spluttered, flapping his arms about in an excellent impression of a drowning goose.
“In my defense, I didn’t know it was her diary at first. I thought it was just a very formal handwritten book.”
“The words “Dear Diary” didn’t clue you in at all?” Jaune asked, making quotes in the air with his fingers.
“She didn’t write “Dear Diary,” Nora retorted, copying his quotes with exaggerated gestures, “she just wrote the date. Besides, I don’t think she’ll get mad about me reading it.”
“Of course she won’t!” Jaune seethed as loudly as he could without drawing stares again. “She’s like the nicest, sweetest, forgivingest person who ever existed! You could pour boiling hot soup in her lap and she’d probably apologize.”
He slumped down in his chair and put his face in his arms. “I’ve really got it bad, don’t I?” he mumbled.
“You sure do, Jauney!” Nora said happily, ruffling his hair fondly.
“Shut up, Nora,” he grumbled, beating away her hands and fixing his unruly hair as best he could.
“I don’t think “forgivingest” is a word,” Ren commented.
“You also shut up,” Jaune muttered, his voice muffled behind his arms. “You aren’t helping.”
“But anyway, the morality of diary read aside, she definitely likes you,” Nora concluded, eyeing the mini muffins and wondering if the threat of no pancakes was worth the risk.
“But does she really ?” Jaune asked, rolling his head to the side so he could gaze up at her with a truly pathetic expression on his face. “Like, girls don’t like me, Nora,” he explained, straightening up.
“What about Ruby?”
“She’s different,” Jaune said, waving away Ren’s comment. “I’ve known Ruby since forever, she’s like my sister.”
“Yeah, ‘cause you really need more of those,” Nora muttered, rolling her eyes.
Jaune plowed on like he hadn’t even heard her, and with how tunnel-visioned he was, maybe he really hadn’t heard her.
“No like, like me like me, ya know?” Jaune clarified, but not really. “I barely even get to the friend stage with most people, let alone with girls. I don’t think a girl has ever has a crush on me in all nineteen years of my life.”
He was running out of momentum, which was good, because she’d known him to rant for hours if you let him get a full head of steam. “So I need you to be totally, absolutely sure,” he was saying when she checked back into the conversation, “because I really like her, and just...ya know...I hope she likes me,” he concluded rather lamely, stealing one of the mini muffins Nora had been eyeing and stuffing it in his mouth.
“Aren’t you supposed to be working?” Ren asked, glancing up at his friend.
“Shush, I’m on break or something,” Jaune mumbled around a mouthful of muffin. “Neptune’ll cover for me.”
“I don’t know how many times we have to tell you before you get it,” Nora grumbled. “She’s into you! Why don’t you see it?!” she fumed, miming strangling him.
“But does-?”
“Yes! Yes she does!” Nora interrupted him, throwing her hands up in the air. “I read what she said about you, and if I have to read one more sentence about your cute butt and floofy hair, I think I might vomit.”
“You didn’t have to read the original sentences, to be fair,” Ren pointed out, pulling a different, and somehow larger, reference book out of his bag.
“Shush you.”
“She thinks it’s floofy?” Jaune asked, touching the messy curls and blushing with delight. “That- that’s a good thing, right?” he asked, looking unsure.
“I give up,” Nora announced, “You’re hopeless, and I give up.” Then she stood and marched dramatically away, already texting furiously to somebody.
“You think she’s serious about that?” Jaune asked his friend out of the corner of his mouth as he watched the red head push her way through the throng of exhausted students.
“I’ve never known Nora to be serious about anything,” Ren assured him, checking his phone when it buzzed with texts, undoubtedly from Nora. “She’ll be back soon enough, once you stop acting like an idiot.”
“Hey! That’s not fair,” Jaune pouted.
“It’s true though, you’re being an idiot about this,” Ren argued, glancing in the direction of the door when the bell indicated that someone new entered the already crowded coffee shop.
“Now come on, that’s not even remotely true,” Jaune scoffed, and deflated a little under Ren’s skeptical look. “Okay, it’s not entirely true, but-”
Ren fixed him with a piercing look from through his glasses. Jaune could only hold his intense gaze for a few moments before he was forced to look away. “Jaune,” Ren started, face and voice softening, “Why is it so hard for you to believe that she cares for you?”
Jaune looked like he was trying to collapse in on himself. “Because...she’s just so fantastic,” he mumbled, not meeting Ren’s gaze, “And I’m just sort of...not, ya know?”
“Have we ever lied to you before?” Ren asked, closing his books.
“I- what?” Jaune looked more taken aback by the sudden topic change than anything else.
“Answer the question, please.”
“I mean, no I don’t think you have,” Jaune answered, looking confused. “But why are you asking?”
“I’m asking, because if we haven’t lied to you before, then why would we start now? And especially about something that’s clearly important to you,” Ren explained, glancing up at someone over Jaune’s shoulder and waving them over.
“So believe us when we say that she does like you,” Ren reassured him, standing and packing up his things. He patted Jaune on the shoulder, breaking him out of his shock.
“I’ve got to go and make sure Nora hasn’t decided to break anything in the five minutes I wasn’t there to stop her,” Ren said, beckoning the same person over again. “Besides, I believe there’s something you need to talk about.”
“Talk about with who?” Jaune asked, turning around and blushing right to the roots of his hair at the sight of the person Ren was talking with. “Oh hey, Pyrrha!” he said in a much higher pitched tone of voice.
“I assume you got Nora’s text?” Ren asked, a little too knowingly.
“I- yes,” she said, glancing at Jaune before focusing on Ren. “She said you needed to speak with me?”
“Actually, it’s Jaune who needs to speak with you,” Ren clarified, glancing at his phone. “You can take my seat, I’m leaving anyway.” Hopefully Jaune could handle this by himself.
Jaune could not handle this by himself.
His face was bright red, and he knew it. Curse you Ren and Nora for obviously setting him up with this impromptu and definitely not-casual meeting. He had to tell her, he was going to tell her. But as soon as she sat down, Pyrrha flicked her long ponytail over her shoulder, and smiled shyly just at him. And he forgot how to speak in complete sentences.
“So, what did you want to talk to me about?” she asked, smiling softly. Her eyes were twinkling like emeralds, and she was actually sitting there and speaking to him. Pyrrha Nikos was sitting and talking to him over coffee.
Sure they’d spoken before in class, but this was different. They weren’t talking about history and the social implications of whatever, they were talking about potential emotions and stuff.
Or at least they would be if Jaune could stop staring at her.
Thunderstruck: so are they talking??!?
Dad: I did my part. They’re at least sitting at the table together.
Thunderstruck: mission “get these two idiots to make out” is a go!
Literal Child: Ice Queen, are you in position?
Mom: I don’t understand why I have to be the one to do this.
Goldilocks: because youre the only one of us who drinks that much coffee while you study
Mr. Kitty Cat Meow Face: She’s right you know
Goldilocks: thanks babe <3
Mom: And what is the point of code names if they are only getting typed in a group text?
Literal Child: LESS TEXTING MORE WATCHING!!
Literal Child: And it’s not a real mission without code names!!
Ocean Man: Remind me why Jaune gets to take off work but I don’t
Monkey King: because youre the only one we could get who could cover for lover boy during this whole schtick
Ocean Man: Thanks dude I always knew you’d have my back
Mr. Kitty Cat Meow Face: Shouldn't you be working and not texting us
Ocean Man: Shut
“Jaune?” Pyrrha prompted, now looking concerned by his silence.
He couldn’t say anything. It was like he’d swallowed a golf ball. Why couldn’t he say anything?!
Mom: Oh no.
Thunderstruck: what? WHAT??!
Mom: That blonde dolt is too star stuck to speak.
Literal Child: you’re kidding
Literal Child: you’re kidding right??
Ocean Man: Nah, I can confirm that he’s just sitting there
Goldilocks: oh come on lover boy pull it together
Dad: We did think that this was a possibility. He does have a tendency to freeze up.
Mr. Kitty Cat Meow Face: Wait if we saw this coming then why did we leave this up to Jaune
Monkey King: it was basically the only option
Thunderstruck: believe me, she’s not much better than him
Mom: Wait hold on, shut up, I think they’re saying something.
“Are you feeling okay, Jaune?” Pyrrha asked, concern clearly rising in her face.
Come on, pull yourself together. You have to say something. Can’t just keep sitting here silence! Say something, anything ! Anything but just sitting there staring at her like an idiot. And it was this thought that finally had Jaune creaking open his jaw and blurting out the first words that came to mind.
“Nora read your diary,” he all but yelled, still sitting as straight as a board, and bright red in the face.
Mom: Oh for fuck’s sake, you idiot.
Ocean Man: Mission failed, we’ll get ‘em next time
Literal Child: Ice Queen report!! what happened??
Mom: He just told her that Nora read her diary.
Thunderstruck: new mission objective: don’t let him die from embarrassment
Thunderstruck: i want to kill him first