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Jared didn't need to hear more from the others and he was already running through the hospital to the Lab. They didn't tell him, and it was for reasons. Jared was stupid enough to even think that Shaun being absent for 2 days straight was okay and it was because he needed space. Jared was so fucking stupid to think it was okay for him to try to convince himself that Shaun was fine for 2 days and decided to stop looking after him ever since. Jared was stupid and the worse boyfriend anyone could ever have
--
"He was what?!" He knew he needed to lower his voice, continue on with the prestigious doctor act, but this was dire. Claire had to shush him before the others in the cafeteria decide they were an interesting thing to watch
"Dr. Han decided to move Shaun to Pathology" He couldn't believe what he was hearing. One year, one year of hard work and it was all gone for Shaun?! One year of making friends, one year of improving his social skills, one year of newly gained knowledge, one year of secretly dating his fellow resident, one year of progress and all that for nothing?!
"Why would he do that?!" Jared whispered quietly but loud enough for Claire to hear
"I don't know! Something about him having bad bedside manner? I'm not even sure!" Jared groaned internally
"Bedside manner? What 'bedside manner'?! If he's talking about Shaun's social skills then he should know we're working on it and he's improving! He just needs encouragement not some asshole breathing down on his neck!"
"I know I know but Han didn't think that was good enough, so he decided Shaun is better off sent to the Path lab because then Shaun won't have to interact with patients" Jared slumped his back on his seat, his half eaten toasted cheese sandwich forgotten. This was bad, very bad. It made him angry to even think about it
"I need to do something about-" Before he could finish his sentence, Claire cut him off
"Jared, don't" Her tone was that of a warning and Jared fell quiet. Claire continued
"Look, I know things are hard for you considering your relationship with Shaun, and as his best friend I'm pissed too. But taking drastic measures into our own hands will make situations worse! Think about it!" No matter how much he hated to admit it, Claire was right. He couldn't just jump and tackle Han to the ground and put his martial arts training to good use until he send Shaun back to surgery. As much as he hated him, Han was his boss, he's the Chief of Surgery and there's nothing he could do about it
"I know. And I hate it. I just wish I could've done more..." Claire placed a comforting hand on his arm, rubbing it softly
"It's okay. I wish I could've stopped him too" Jared groaned. He really couldn't blame Claire. It wasn't her fault. He's too ignorant to even notice it from the beginning and it took an entire 2 days of Shaun's absence to realize something was wrong. Shaun hadn't even talked to him, hadn't approached him, and Jared hadn't approached him either and just figured Shaun needed some space to work some things out with Dr. Glassman. He didn't think it was that bad
"What should I do? I mean, I haven't seen him in awhile" And it was by my own expense, I'm such a jackass He thought but never slipped those in
"I don't know. I haven't seen him in awhile either. Dr. Lim has and she said he's coping with it, but I think that's just her way of saying Shaun isn't the happiest camper in Path, considering she didn't say anything else" Jared groaned louder. He really was the worse boyfriend ever
"I need to see him. Can you please cover for me?" Jared's tone was pleading and it took no more than a second for Claire to respond
"Of course. But I can only do so much. Dr. Lim and Dr. Melendez would be fine with it, I think. But Dr. Han, I'm not sure if I could cover for you for long. And let's not forget Morgan" Jared nodded
"Yeah, okay, perfect. I owe you one, Claire"
"Just make sure he's okay, Kalu. Then we're even" With a single thumbs up, Jared dashed through the hallway towards the Labs
--
He really should be learning how to be a better boyfriend after this whole shenanigan settle
Jared stood in front of the lab, no otger doctors but the pathologists were on sight so that's good. He approached one of the pathologist availabe, her name was Dr. Carly Lever, he guessed? He didn't really pay attention much when it came to the labs
"Dr. Kalu, can I help you?" Her voice was warm and calming with a hint of professionalism beneath. Jared nodded, trying to keep a professional appearance
"Yeah. Is Sh- Dr. Murphy around? I need to talk to him" He almost let it slip. Carly either didn't seem to notice or ignored it and just smiled
"He is. Hold on, I'll tell him" Carly moved to the back of the lab. Jared peeked inside the glass to see Shaun on one of the computers with his back turned towards him. Something about his posture seemed tense. He saw Carly approaching the young pathologist-turned surgeon and whispering something to him. He assumed it was to tell him he was there because Shaun immediately turned and stared at Jared for awhile
"I want to take a break" He heard Shaun said as he exited the Lab. Jared looked back at Carly who smiled and shrugged
"Pathologists can take breaks whenever they want" Was the only thing Carly said before returning to work. Jared turned to see Shaun looking around the hallway, waiting for Jared to say something
"Let's go to the 'secret hideout'" Jared offered Shaun a smile and his hand. Shaun just looked confused
"Shouldn't you be in surgery?" Jared dropped his hand. It hurt Jared a bit to hear him say that as he was reminded once again why Shaun wasn't with him in the OR assisting whoever attendee needed their assistance. But that was for later
"And you should be in the lab examining things" He joked, but in the traditional S. Murphy sense, Shaun responded with a statement that's supposedly a half joke half fact
"Dr. Lever said pathologists can take breaks whenever they want. I'm taking mine now"
"Yeah, she just said that too. Oh and don't worry about me, Claire got me covered" Shaun frowned slightly
"That doesn't make any sense"
"Well, it will, once we get to our 'secret hideout'" Jared extended his hand once again. It took a full minute for Shaun to process before he finally nodded
"Okay" The younger took Jared's hand and held on to it as they walked towards the locker room. There were no one in so they had the room to themselves. Perfect. Jared guided Shaun towards his locker first, picking out a bag of cool ranch doritos before finally guiding Shaun towards their 'secret hideout', which was the deep end of the locker room and slumped down to the ground
"Come and sit" He patted the spot beside him and Shaun sat right on it. Jared opened the bag, took out a dorito, and placed it in the middle. It took Shaun a few seconds to settle and took one dorito for himself. The younger hummed in pleasure
"This feels nice"
"I agree. I missed doing this" Shaun bobbed his head to a nod excitedly. He enjoyed this particular type of date he and Jared had made up where they just sit down in a remote place away from people with a bag of chips in the middle and just enjoy each other's presence, usually they'd talk and gossip, which Shaun also enjoyed if it meant Jared would laugh and would listen to Shaun telling him how his day went. Usually they'd do this during night shifts when it's the least busy
Which made Shaun wonder why they're doing this on a day shift with Jared not assisting Dr. Han and Shaun not assisting Dr. Lever
"Will you tell me what we're doing now?" Jared sighed. He knew it'd come to this, Jared just hoped this temporary ignorance and happiness would last much longer
"Shaun, why didn't you tell me about this whole arrangement with Dr. Han?"
"Because I thought you wouldn't mind"
Of course I mind, you beautiful idiot! But Jared held his tongue
"But I do. I mind. He can't just move you away like that" Shaun's expression dropped and his shoulders slumped. Jared could see the tiredness in his eyes
"He can. He's Chief of Surgery. He decides what's best for the surgical department" Jared groaned
"What's best for the surgical department team is not moving you to Path! It's considering you as a part of the team!" Shaun fell silent and Jared could see he's too tired to even respond. What are they even doing to him in Path? Jared wanted to ask, but he guessed this was no time for it. A full minute of silence and Jared couldn't take it, so he changed the subject
"How're you doing?" He asked softly, not wanting to make his already tired boyfriend feel even worse
"Not well. I'm not allowed to get involved in surgeries anymore, I've been trying to convince Dr. Han to take me back to surgery but he doesn't care and told me not to waste his time and that nothing will change his mind" Oh if Han wasn't his chief, Jared would beat the living daylight out of him
"Dr. Glassman said I have to do this on my own, and Dr. Lim said Dr. Han is very stubborn so I don't think I can do anything to convince him to take me back to surgery" His voice was heavy and filled with hopelessness. He should've given up from the beginning, but this little annoying voice in the back of his head kept telling him to keep going and one day, it'll sort things out and he'd return to surgery. But as days pass, the voice became quieter and it worried Shaun a bit that one day, there would really be no more hope
"Woah... Okay, that's..." Jared really didn't know what to say to not trigger anything sensitive. Everything felt so complicated
"It's very bad" Yeah those were the words and Shaun took it right out of his mouth. Both slumped back, the atmosphere darkening. Jared felt Shaun's calloused hand reach out for his and held it. Somewhere deep in Jared, he felt immense happiness, seeing him so trusting and so affectionate since Shaun really wasn't the touchy type of person. But this situation changed the whole mood
"I know" He held Shaun's hand and the two fell to silence, only the sounds of dorito cruching filling the room. Jared hated this, hated the feeling of helplessness, hated the feeling of not being able to do something that he knew was right. Jared turned to see Shaun staring into space, seemingly shutting down. Jared sighed and ruffled the younger's hair, catching his attention slightly
"Don't worry, Shaun. It'll happen, you just have to try harder if you want to convince someone as stubborn as Han. I know things are very hard, but all you need to do is keep going. And don't worry, if you need anything, I'll be right by you to help you along the way" Jared couldn't really think of anything he could do and the only thing he could think about now was to encourage Shaun and support him 100% without distance. Shaun nodded
"Okay" The younger scooted closer and lay his head on the taller's shoulder, taking in the warmth and comfort he gave off. Jared made Shaun feel safe and secured, if Jared was around Shaun knew he could do it because Jared's always looking out for him, supporting him, would even fight for him if necessary, so it gave Shaun some hope and energy to keep going
"Okay" Jared parroted. The younger shifted to a more comfortable position before settling. Shaun was so close to giving up, was so close to accept his new life behind a desk in the lab. But Jared had snapped him out of it, Jared had given him hope. So maybe he could fight longer
It'll turn out better, Jared had assured, and Shaun was ready for it
--
It was in the middle of a rainy night. Jared was in his own apartment watching television after coming back from a long ass shift. He still needed to find a way to return Shaun to the OR, but he's just so tired he needed this one moment. Some times in 01:25, a knock was heard behind his door
Who could that be?
When Jared finally opened the door, the person that stood in front of him shocked him
Shaun stood in front of him drenched in rain, his muscles tensed, and his expression tired. He was breathing heavily, having troubles with catching his breath. He's been hyperventilating. Jared's eyes went wide in shock. Something bad had happened, he could tell
"Shaun? What are you doing out here? Come in!" He pulled Shaun gently inside and set him down the couch. Shaun was shivering cold and it worried Jared to no end
"Stay here while I get you some change of clothes" Before he could move, Shaun held his wrist and stopped him. He's still breathing heavily and Jared's worry increased
"Shaun-"
"Stay" He muttered under his shivering breath, slightly coherent. Jared sighed
"Look, I won't be too far, alright? You know where my room is, I'm just going there to take some new clothes" Shaun frantically shook his head
"No. No. No" Jared could see his distress and of course that triggered another worry
"If you don't change now, you're gonna catch hypothermia" Though he really thought it was a bit too late but still. Shaun was stubborn and wouldn't move. Something was definetly wrong. Jared thought for a second and finally decided that he needes to resolve whatever's bothering Shaun so much if he wanted to progress
"Shaun, hey hey I'm right here" Jared drew circles on Shaun's hand, trying to calm him, assure him that he's there. The younger's breathing began to calm and his eyes became visibly puffy from crying
"Yeah, that's it. I'm right here. I'm not going anywhere" Slowly but surely, his breathing went back to its original pace and his grip on Jared's hand was starting to become loose. It took a few minutes for Shaun to finally be able to breathe normally. Jared was patient, he knew something was bothering Shaun so much he went to a full meltdown so the best course of action was to help him through it. Jared placed a soft kiss on his hand to further reassure him and Shaun finally relaxed
"Okay. Okay" He said in his monotonous voice, but it vibrated with a tinge of sadness. Jared settled down beside Shaun, placed his hand on his back and began drawing circles. It helped him calm down. Jared finally sighed in relief to see his partner finally calmed. Well, as calm as Shaun could be. Once it all settled, he finally braced himself to ask
"Tell me what happened" It took Shaun another minute to settle down and finally he spoke
"Dr. Han fired me" Oh. Oh.
Oh no
Oh dear
Oh fuck
"Shaun..." Jared observed Shaun's fidgeting body, trying to seek the same warmth Jared had always provided
"I tried to convince him. I told him I'm a surgeon and he fired me" Oh fuck. Fuck fuck fuck. This is bad Jared was silent, unsure of the reaction he could give. But before he could say anything, Shaun continued
"I can't go home so I went here" Jared still didn't know what to say. He knew Han was a dick but to go this far? That's extremely much! Without saying anything, Jared pulled Shaun closer to an embrace. The younger tensed for a moment before settling to a comfortable position in the embrace. He needed this. He needed him. He needed his rein on reality, the source of his comfort and feeling of security. Usually he hated hugs but this time? He needed it. Needed his reassurance
Jared stayed silent as Shaun slowly fell asleep in his embrace, tired of the things he had faced. Jared hated Han, despised him with his whole being. But then, he hated himself. Jared hated himself for not being able to do anything, not being able to protect nor to help Shaun in his battle against Han. Shaun had fought alone and where did that lead him? He should've been there, paid more attention. And what did he do? Only told Shaun everything will be okay when in reality, it won't. He told Shaun to keep going while in reality he knew it won't do anything. Everything fell apart
Life really killed his dreams that quickly huh? Even after everything he had gone through. And all Jared could say now was
"It'll be okay"
But in reality,
Fuck you, Han. You can't stop me!