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Sakura looked up from her lunch and eyed Shikamaru worriedly. “Shikamaru?”
He was leaning his elbow on the table with his face in his hand as he looked off to the side. He answered her distractedly, “Hm?”
Sakura wasn’t a self-centered person, but she was getting a little annoyed at him barely paying her any attention. After the war, their group had intermingled more outside of their own teams as people got moved around for missions more specific for their expertise. Shikamaru and Sakura had gotten paired up often and they worked well together. It had created this easy friendship between them, and Sakura always looked forward to when he dropped by to take her out for lunch or when he invited her over to show her some of the Nara medical libraries. She often found herself going to lay on his cloud-watching hill even if he wasn’t there.
She’d had a long day and had been looking forward to their lunch so for him to basically ignore her was starting grind her nerves. She kicked him under the table.
He winced and looked at her in surprise. “What was that for?”
Sakura raised an eyebrow at him. “What’s with you? You’ve been staring off in the distance for the past thirty minutes.”
Shikamaru rubbed in between his eyes with a sigh, then looked at her with a small smile. “Sorry, Sakura. I guess I’m a little distracted.”
Sakura’s irritation slipped away at his smile. She leaned forward. “What’s wrong?”
Shikamaru hesitated before telling her, “Kankuro’s getting married.”
Sakura waited and when he didn’t say anymore, she teased him, “And? Were you hoping he was holding out for you?”
His face at least relaxed as he rolled his eyes. “No, Sakura.” He was quiet for a moment and then he looked to the side again. “I think I need a date.”
“A date? To the wedding?” Since when did Shikamaru care about things like that?
He nodded and sighed, shrugging as he leaned back in his chair. “Every time I go to Suna, everyone tries to force Temari and I together. It’s annoying.”
Sakura wasn’t ready to think about why that made her chest tighten. She took a drink from her glass and asked, “Temari?”
“No, but just about everyone else. She doesn’t like it either.”
“If you had a date, then people wouldn’t be able to say anything.” Sakura started to get where he was going with this.
He nodded, a small smile on his lips. “I almost debated not going but I’ve become pretty good friends with him over the years. I don’t want to be rude.” He sighed and waved a hand. “I asked Ino, but she’ll still be out on her mission by then.”
Sakura felt her stomach flop as she decided what she was about to offer. She’d been debating whether or not to take the weekend off to go anyway. Joji could cover her shift at the hospital…
She watched as his expression changed as he looked at her, something occurring to him. He cleared his throat, a nervous smile on his lips. “Would you – “
Sakura shrugged with a smile. “If you need me to. I mean I’m no Ino but –“
“That’s even better,” Shikamaru interrupted her, his smile growing, and Sakura ignored how it made her heart skip a beat. “Ino would go along with it, but I know even she wants me to get together with Temari.”
Sakura broke eye contact, looking back down to her food as she asked, “But you don’t?”
“No.” His simple answer made her glance at him. She could tell there was more behind it, but he didn’t continue, and she didn’t want to push.
He walked her back to the hospital after he grabbed the check – Sakura had tried to argue but he insisted she was doing him a favor and it was the least he could do. She was about to tell him goodbye as she stepped away when he reached out and caught her arm.
His eyes were serious as he raised an eyebrow at her. “You’re sure you want to go?”
Sakura smiled at him. “Yes, Shikamaru, I’ll be your date to Kankuro’s wedding.” She jerked her head towards the hospital. “I don’t have any missions next weekend and I’ll go put in for some time off.”
His shoulders relaxed, his smile returning to his face. “Thank you, Sakura-chan.”
***
Sakura teased him as they walked towards the shop, “I can’t believe you don’t own any formal wear, Shikamaru.”
He rubbed the back of his neck and huffed. “Not outside of yukatas, no, and I’m not wearing one of those, especially over there in that heat.”
Sakura chuckled with a shrug as they walked into the shop. “Well, based on what you decide, I might get something new.”
Shikamaru glanced down at her, his eyebrows scrunching together. “Don’t you have a bunch of dresses?”
Sakura crossed her arms and leaned towards him. “Yeah, but I want to match whatever you get.”
He smiled and looked around the store. “I’ll just pick something to match you instead. Aren’t women always complaining about how troublesome it is to find a dress you like?”
Something warm grew in Sakura’s chest as she chuckled and replied, “Okay, then, I’ll let you know if I can’t work with something.”
He nodded and started to walk around, seemingly grabbing things at random. Sakura rolled her eyes fondly as his laziness as she followed him to the dressing rooms in the back. He slipped inside one while Sakura waited nearby, looking over more shirts for him.
Shikamaru came out a moment later, stepping in front of the floor length mirror. “Sakura, this will match something you have, won’t it? It’s mostly black.”
Sakura looked over at him, the reply on the tip of her tongue dying as her eyes fell on him. His outfit was black from the pants and shirt to the vest and jacket. Sakura had known this man almost her whole life and seen him in all sorts of things; play clothes as a kid, a jounin uniform, sweats and a long sleeve, a yukata for a festival. But there was something about the way the fabric hugged him, the black outlining the long lines of his body. Something that made her feel like her heart had dropped to her stomach.
Oh.
Sakura’s eyes travelled back up to his face. His dark eyes were on the cuffs of his sleeves as he fiddled with the buttons. Sakura felt her mouth go dry as he continued to talk, “We could look at ties and pocket squares for some color, so it matches your dress.”
He glanced in the mirror before looking to her with a smile. “What do you think?”
Oh.
When she didn’t reply, his smile faltered. “Sakura?”
Sakura swallowed and tried for a smile as she nodded. “Looks great, Shikamaru.” She tore her eyes away from him, her skin feeling hot and looked around the store for some kind of escape. “It’ll be easy to match.”
Oh, no.
Shikamaru’s hand was on her arm and she was so proud at how she didn’t jump away in surprise. She looked back to him as he spoke, “You alright?”
She nodded and ran her fingers through her hair. “Yeah, yeah. I was just thinking about something from work. Got a little distracted.”
He nodded, though he still looked slightly concerned. “Do you need to go?”
“No.” Sakura waved a hand, feeling her heart start to race. Did her pulse always sound like it was pounding in her ear? “No, I just remembered some reports I need to write before we leave tomorrow.”
“Alright.” He stepped back towards the dressing room and gestured down at himself. Sakura did not look down from his face. “Then, if this is fine…?”
Fuck.
She nodded and breathed in through her nose. “Yeah, you look amazing in it.” Knowing she was bordering on blushing – if she wasn’t already – she stepped away. “I’ll go look at the ties while you change back.”
Shikamaru gave her a confused smile before going back to his dressing room. Sakura bolted away, trying to go in the general direction where accessories were. She found the ties easily enough, her fingers looking over a few as her mind raced.
She was attracted to Shikamaru.
She shrugged, shaking her head as she let out a breath. She was vaguely aware the shopkeeper was looking over at her in worry.
Well, that wasn’t such a big deal, was it? A lot of shinobi were attractive. Shikamaru wasn’t the first person she thought was attractive, not by a long shot. So, why was she freaking out? Kiba was attractive. Ino was attractive. But she never went into a panic every time that thought crossed her mind when she was with them.
Shikamaru was attractive, so attractive. Had she thought so before and just let the thought pass through like she did with her other friends? She couldn’t remember. But as it hit her, she was surprised it’d never hit her so hard before. His dark narrow eyes that he outlined with the thinnest eyeliner. The mesh that peaked out from under his shirt covering his skin. His long muscles and smirk. That smile he gave her that Sakura had to admit usually made her heart skip a beat…
Fuck.
Sakura tried to ignore the incoming thought, but it persisted and stomped its foot behind her eyes. Was it more than attraction?
She felt a hand on her elbow and almost yelped, turning to see Shikamaru. He raised an eyebrow at her. “You’re sure you’re alright?”
She chuckled as her heart threatened to beat out of her ribcage. “Yes, Shikamaru.”
“Because I had already called out to you before grabbing you, but you didn’t answer.”
She shrugged and looked back to the ties. “Sorry, I was trying to think of the dress I wanted to wear.”
Shikamaru didn’t seem like he bought it but let it go. He hummed and looked over the ties. “Did you decide?”
Sakura remembered how cold Suna could get at night and decided on a soft pink dress she owned that had long sleeves. She grabbed a deep red tie and held it up to him. “How about this one?”
He smiled with a shrug. “Whatever you want, Sakura.”
Oh, what an offer.
Sakura slapped the thought away and hoped she wasn’t blushing as she turned and grabbed a matching kerchief. She let out a breath and held them out to him. “Then, these.”
He nodded and took them from her, then walked over to the shopkeeper. Sakura watched him go, feeling something crawl up her back. A weird mix of trepidation and excitement that cemented itself into the notches of her spine.
It was. It was definitely more than attraction. How the hell hadn’t she noticed she’d started to fall for Shikamaru?
***
Sakura grumbled as she paced the small cavern. “This wedding better be worth it or I’m murdering Kankuro before he can even think about getting lucky on his wedding night.”
Shikamaru chuckled as he got a fire going. “Sakura, it’s always like this travelling to Suna.”
Sakura huffed and complained crossing her arms with her hands rubbing up and down her arms, “I hate travelling to Suna. Stupid wedding.”
Shikamaru looked at her with an amused smile as the fire finally started. He leaned back against the wall. “Hey, at least we found a cave before the sandstorm started to pick up.”
Sakura sighed and looked over at him, realizing he was trying to be positive because she was acting like a brat. “I know. I’m sorry.”
Shikamaru shook his head and beckoned her to him. “It’s fine. I know why you’re complaining. Come here. I built the fire for a reason.”
Sakura hesitated and instantly felt bad as Shikamaru noticed. He frowned. “What?”
Sakura glanced at the opening of the cave as if she was concerned about the storm. She shrugged and walked over to him, siting beside him in front of the fire. “Nothing.”
Shikamaru leaned against her. “I made sure that we left early enough that a couple sandstorms wouldn’t make us late. We’re making good on time, so don’t worry.”
Sakura nodded and let her head fall to his shoulder, making herself comfortable against him. Their cloaks laid nearby along with their face masks, but Sakura still felt like she was covered in dirt. She longed for a shower and was thankful Shikamaru had planned for them to arrive a day before the wedding.
Her hand brushed his as he moved beside her and he grabbed her hand, then the other. “Sakura, your skin is like ice.”
Sakura mumbled as she watched his hands wrap around hers, her heart erratic in her chest. “Well, I’m cold.”
Shikamaru chuckled and brought her hands up to his mouth, cupping them and breathing hot air across them. The action made Sakura’s breath catch in her throat. He was surprisingly gentle about it and it made Sakura realize how he was always gentle whenever he was with her. Even if her hands barely gained any warmth from him, her insides burned with it.
She smiled and told him softly, “Thank you, Shika.”
Their hands fell to his lap, but he didn’t let go of her, his thumbs absentmindedly stroking across her skin. She didn’t comment on it as he told her quietly, “My mom – her hands are always cold.” She turned her head to look up at him and he had a soft smile on his face as he stared at the fire. “I remember when I was growing up, my dad would always grab her hands and try to warm them up. Whenever they were on the couch, or at breakfast… just whenever.”
Sakura felt something twist inside her at his smile turned sad. She told him quietly back, “I’m sure she always loved it when he did it.”
“Yeah, she did.” Shikamaru cleared his throat and slowly let go of her hands. Sakura tried to not be disappointed, stretching her right arm out like that would’ve started to hurt eventually anyway. She kept her left hand on his thigh, though.
Sakura searched for a topic change, not wanting Shikamaru’s thoughts to take him to a depressing place. She asked him, “So, did you tell Kankuro you were bringing me as your plus one?”
Shikamaru stifled a yawn next to her, his head falling against hers. “No, I figured we’d get there before a messenger bird would. I’m surprised he didn’t invite you himself. Aren’t you two somewhat close?”
Sakura nodded, watching the flames dance. “When he sent out invitations a few months ago, I had been so busy at the hospital after Tsunade and Shizune left and I was still taking on missions. I told him I wasn’t sure if I could make it since it’s so far and I didn’t know if someone could cover me.”
She’d exchanged a few letters with Kankuro over the years and mainly visited with him whenever she was in Suna. She knew their friendship had started out of gratitude for her saving his life but liked to think they’d moved beyond that. She’d wanted to go to his wedding before Shikamaru had asked but hadn’t known if she could take off from the hospital and make the trek alone.
“Did you?”
“Joji-kun will cover me just fine. I’ve been really happy with him.” Sakura smiled as she thought about the apprentice she had taken on. Tsunade had teased her about having a big head and taking an apprentice so young, but she hadn’t wanted a genin team and the village needed more skilled medics.
Shikamaru hummed in response and Sakura patted his thigh. “Go to sleep. I’ll take first watch.”
He didn’t hesitate at the offer and went to move away from her, but Sakura grabbed his arm and pulled him to her lap. He looked up at her with a raised eyebrow and she found some satisfaction in the faint blush on his cheeks. She shrugged with a smile. “I didn’t mean for you to get up. I’m still cold.”
Shikamaru snorted but had a smile on his face. “Works for me.” He made himself more comfortable and closed his eyes. Sakura leaned back against the wall, one of her hands moving to rest over Shikamaru’s chest. She could faintly feel his heartbeat under her fingers and how it slowed as he fell asleep.
When he woke up hours later, the sandstorm was still tearing the outside apart though she did feel like it was letting up. He didn’t bother to ask her before finishing a yawn and telling her, “Switch me.”
He stood up for a second to stretch and then sat beside her. Sakura laid her head on his thigh and turned her head to face the fire. As she began to drift into sleep, she felt his hand move down to cover the ones she had on his leg.
***
Travelling to Suna was always so exhausting. She’d only done it a handful of times and no matter how fond she was of the Kazekage and his siblings, she didn’t plan to do it many more times in the future.
The wind had picked up their last few miles to Suna but Shikamaru had said they were close, so they pushed through it. Sakura felt light like she’d be carried away with the sand until Shikamaru reached out for her and wrapped an arm around her shoulders. Sakura huddled close to him as their feet dug into the sand, her fingers gripping tightly at the cloak on his back.
Sakura knew she probably had, but it had been a while since she’d felt so much relief as when she saw the Suna walls in the distance. Recognizing Shikamaru, the guards didn’t waste any time in letting them through the gates.
As the doors shut behind them, the wind stopped, and Sakura finally felt like she could breathe. She ripped her mask off and coughed. Shikamaru wasn’t much better off next to her but she felt his hand rubbing up and down her back. “As soon as we – “
“Shikamaru!”
They looked up to see the whole reason they’d braved these stupid sandstorms walking towards them with a grin. Sakura smiled as his attention shifted to her and felt her annoyance fall away at how his smile widened.
He pulled her towards him and picked her up in a hug making her giggle. “I thought you said you couldn’t make it.”
She shrugged as he put her back down. “I didn’t want to make any promises and besides I couldn’t let Shikamaru come alone.”
Shikamaru rolled his eyes next to her and she held back a chuckle at how Kankuro’s eyebrow rose. He sent Shikamaru a sly smile as he crossed his arms over his chest. “So, is Sakura your date, Shikamaru?”
Shikamaru unwrapped his mask from his face and let out a breath. “Yes, Kankuro. And no, I’m not getting into it now.”
Kankuro rolled his eyes and opened his mouth but Shikamaru interrupted him, “Where did you have us staying? Sakura’s not used to traveling here. I’m sure she wants to rest.”
Sakura bit her lip to hold back a laugh as Kankuro ruffled Shikamaru’s hair, Shikamaru slapping his hands away as more loose strands fell from his ponytail. “Well, aren’t you a doting boyfriend.”
Shikamaru simply rolled his eyes at him and Kankuro laughed, glancing at Sakura with a crooked grin. He waved a hand and began to walk. “Gaara said he’d put foreign guest up in the Kazekage residence. It’s not like we have very many. I’ll walk you over.”
***
Sakura stepped out of the shower into the steam filled room with a content smile on her face. She’d beelined for it the second Kankuro had left after showing them their room, Shikamaru chuckling after her. She just could not wait to get all the grime and dirt off her skin. She still did not feel like it was all gone, but it was better.
She’d been surprised that Gaara had given them more of a suite than a room; a small living area connected to the bedroom and bath with sliding doors. It was probably one of the most beautiful places she’d ever stayed but it was also the Kazekage residence, so she couldn’t be too surprised.
She’d been daydreaming about that king-sized bed and wondering if she had enough time for a quick nap before they got dragged off to a party, when she reached for her change of clothes on the counter and realized they weren’t there. Sakura’s hand hovered awkwardly over the mardble and felt her heart stop. Shit, she’d forgotten her change of clothes.
She glanced at the dirty ones on the ground and instantly tossed the idea in the trash. No, it wasn’t worth it. She looked at herself in the mirror, her skin faintly pink from the heat of the shower wrapped loosely in a white towel. Sakura turned as she looked at herself. Well, it did cover everything…
Sakura shook her head with a sigh. They were shinobi; shinobi saw each other in various states of dress all the time and on top of that, she was a medic. It just came with the job. She shouldn’t be embarrassed.
Though she knew it was because it was Shikamaru…
Sakura took a deep breath before reaching for the handle. It wasn’t a big deal. She’ll just go grab her clothes and change while Shikamaru takes his own shower.
Sakura opened the door, stepping towards where she’d dropped her bag. “Shikamaru, you can – “
Sakura’s sentence stopped abruptly as she felt more than one set of eyes on her. She looked up to see Shikamaru talking with Kankuro and Temari in the other room. She met Temari’s eyes first as the woman raised an eyebrow, a smirk growing on her face. Before Sakura could even react, Shikamaru had slid the door shut. The force of it hitting the wall filled her ears as she felt blood rush to her face.
Sakura went to her bag and just quickly grabbed it before going back to the bathroom. She changed into another set of clothes, trying to not notice how red her face was in the mirror. She was okay with teammates seeing her barely dressed and had convinced herself it was okay if Shikamaru did. But she had not been okay with random people seeing her like that even if she could consider them friends.
Temari’s amused look flashed behind her eyes and she internally groaned. Sakura waited another moment as her skin cooled down before stepping back out into the room.
The door to their suite clicked shut as she did so and Shikamaru was walking towards her. She ignored how his own cheeks were a warm red and she let her temper cover her embarrassment. She waved an arm angrily at him. “Why the hell would you let people in here while I’m in the shower?”
Shikamaru looked at her defensively and held out his hands. “Well, I didn’t know you were going to walk out naked!”
“I was not naked. I had a towel on!” Sakura’s blush returned to her face and she crossed her arms over her chest, glaring to the side and biting the inside of her cheek.
Shikamaru sighed and Sakura looked over to him to see his hand rubbing at his forehead with his eyes closed. She watched as a smile grew on his face and his shoulders started to shake. Sakura huffed and walked over to him, pushing at his shoulder. “It’s not funny!”
He looked at her with a shrug, some laughter slipping from his lips. “It kind of is.”
Sakura groaned but could feel a smile twitching on her face. She shoved him and bit her lip to keep from smiling. “I hate you.”
Shikamaru chuckled and Sakura wished his smile didn’t make her melt. “Come on, no you don’t.”
Laughter vibrated in her chest and she pushed Shikamaru towards the bathroom. “Yes, I do. Now go take a shower.”
Shikamaru let her push him towards the bathroom, his hand catching the doorway. He looked over his shoulder at her teasingly. “Do you want me to walk out naked so we’re even?”
Sakura glared as her skin heated and she walked over to his bag, then threw it at him. Shikamaru chuckled as he caught it and Sakura told him, “No. Now shut up and go take a shower.”
She could still hear his quiet laughter as he finally closed the door. Sakura let out a breath and laid down on the bed. She buried her face in the pillow and groaned.
***
Sakura felt fingers combing through her hair before she heard a deep voice call out to her, “Sakura.”
Sakura opened her eyes groggily and looked up to see Shikamaru sitting on the edge of the bed near her hip. She hadn’t even realized she’d fallen asleep.
Shikamaru’s smile was soft as he looked down at her. “Sorry, but the party is starting soon. We should start heading that way.”
Sakura sighed and stretched out on the bed. She met Shikamaru’s eyes still sleepy. “Isn’t it supposed to be a guys’ night or something?”
Shikamaru chuckled, his hand resting on her thigh. Sakura tried to not think about how it felt like his touch burned through the fabric. “No, sorry, you’re not getting out of it that easily.”
“Alright.” Sakura sat up and ran a hand through her hair. She got up from the bed and went to the bathroom, calling over her shoulder, “Give me a couple minutes to touch up and we’ll leave.”
Shikamaru sighed and mumbled something about, “Troublesome women” but didn’t argue as his back hit the bed.
Sakura supposed she should’ve realized that agreeing to be Shikamaru’s date meant they had to act like they were together, but she hadn’t. She had been too caught up in her own panic of figuring out she had feelings for him to consider any repercussions to this.
She hoped she wouldn’t regret coming by the end of the weekend. But she couldn’t say for sure if she had to continuously act like Shikamaru acting like he liked her wasn’t tearing bits and pieces from her heart.
They were out drinking at the local bar the Sand shinobi liked to frequent, dozens of people milling about celebrating tomorrow’s wedding. It was the same place Kankuro usually took her to when she was in town. The place was loud with both wedding parties joining together in the small bar. They mixed in certain places but still felt like the place was divided as Kankuro kept to his friends and his fiancée, Minorin, kept to hers; the couple trying to not interact before the wedding though Sakura noticed them shooting glances towards each other throughout the night. It was kind of sweet.
They hadn’t moved much throughout the night, staying nestled in a booth not too far from the table Kankuro was at. They were of course all friends, but he obviously had people closer to him and they didn’t want to intrude too much.
Temari and one of her friends were across from them. Sakura tried to remember the woman’s name as Shikamaru’s fingers played subconsciously with loose threads from her pants as his hand rested on her knee under the table. Had he always been so distracting? Sakura felt increasingly aware of everything about him; the way he leaned into her, the heat of his hand, the faint cologne he had on, his warm laugh as he bantered with Temari.
“Sakura?” The woman across from her smiled at her with a raised eyebrow.
Sakura felt her focus go back to her as she realized she hadn’t heard a word of what the woman had told her. She covered Shikamaru’s hand with hers to stop his moving fingers and smiled apologetically, an excuse rolling off her lips. “Sorry, my mind’s a little foggy. It was a long journey.”
The woman nodded – what the hell was her name? – and Temari leaned on the table towards Sakura. Sakura looked at her to see a sly smile and she internally groaned as the woman teased, “Did the hot shower help?”
Sakura bit the inside of her cheek as her skin warmed. She leaned back against the booth and glanced at Shikamaru annoyed. “Shikamaru should’ve closed that door when you came by.”
“Hey – “
“Do you often walk around without any clothes on if Shikamaru’s there?” Temari cocked an eyebrow at her, leaning her face in her hand with a smirk on her lips.
“Temari!” Her friend hit her on the shoulder with a scolding glare.
Temari laughed and leaned back, glancing between Sakura and Shikamaru. “What? I rarely get a chance to tease Shikamaru and have never gotten to tease Sakura before. Let me have my fun.”
Her friend rolled her eyes while Shikamaru sighed. “Temari, could you just not?”
Temari chuckled. “What? Am I being a drag?” She glanced at Sakura and asked him, “You never told me about you two. How long have you – “
“Temari!” Sakura and Shikamaru were saved from her finishing the question by Minorin running over to their table.
Temari’s face was kinder as she looked at her. “What is it?”
Minorin’s smile was wide as she grabbed Temari’s arm and pulled her out of the booth. “I told my sister about that trick you do with the shot glasses and your fan. Come show her!”
Temari let herself be pulled, shooting a smile over her shoulder at them. She called out as she walked away, “I’m not done with you, Shikamaru!” Her friend chuckled and followed after her, a quick goodbye on her lips.
Shikamaru rolled his eyes at her back but Sakura only saw fondness there. She didn’t like the ugly part of herself that was annoyed by it. She took a long drink from her sake cup and ignored the aching in her chest as she moved to lean her back against the wall, propping her feet up in Shikamaru’s lap. He looked over at her with a smile and Sakura felt some tension release from her chest.
She tapped his stomach with one of her feet. “Maybe we should think of some answers to those kinds of questions.”
There was some hesitation in his face and before she could ask for what, one of his hands fell to her ankle touching the soft skin there. He propped an elbow on the table and leaned his head into his hand as he looked at her with a small smile on his lips. “Like what?”
Sakura felt oddly warm and blamed it on the sake. “How long have we been together?”
“A few months,” he answered easily with a shrug.
“Why haven’t you ever told anyone here?” Sakura continued, trying to think of questions someone might ask.
“Never came up.”
Sakura laughed and grabbed her sake cup after Shikamaru poured more for her. “Are you just going to be extremely vague about the whole thing?”
He chuckled and shrugged again. “It wouldn’t surprise anyone. They’ll just call me lazy about not wanting to give more details.”
Sakura looked down at her sake cup with a soft snort. “I guess so.” She glanced up at him after a moment. “You know some of us might tease you about it every now and again, but I don’t really think you’re lazy like when you were a kid.”
Shikamaru looked at her a little surprised before smiling with a light blush in his cheeks. “Thanks, Sakura.”
She smiled back, warmth filling her chest that had nothing to do with the burn of the sake in her throat. Shikamaru’s thumb started to stroke across her ankle and Sakura fought to not kick him out of instinct.
There was a chorus of cheers from across the bar and Sakura’s eyes followed the sound to see Temari grinning cheekily at a table with Minorin laughing surrounded by her friends. Feeling her eyes on her, Temari glanced her way and winked at her. Sakura tried for a smile back and then, Shikamaru’s head was blocking her view as he leaned towards her. “Hey, are you alright? You’ve been kind of quiet tonight.”
Sakura swallowed and nodded, her head hitting the wall behind her. She winced as her hair caught a loose nail in the paneling and tugged on her head. There was a soft chuckle and then Shikamaru’s hands were on her, one on the curve of her neck and the other trying to untangle her hair from the nail. “Here, I’ll get it.”
Sakura felt her heart rate pick up with how close he was. His breath ghosting across her skin as he gently freed her hair. Once he got it, he leaned back but not very far. Sakura felt her thoughts leave her as she got enveloped in the warmth of his eyes. She didn’t think she’d ever been treated as gentle as when he tucked her hair behind her ear. “Sakura, I – “
The loud noise at the end of their booth nearly made Sakura jump out of her skin and she barely held back a yelp. Shikamaru sighed as he turned around to see Kankuro standing there with a teasing grin, his hand on the wall of the booth where he’d slammed it. “So, this is where you two have been hiding out all night.”
Shikamaru gave him an annoyed look and Sakura couldn’t stop her open glare, which only made Kankuro’s grin widen in amusement. Shikamaru moved back away from Sakura and leaned back against the booth. “We have not been hiding. Temari was over here just a few minutes ago.”
Kankuro waved a hand. “Forget Temari.” He jerked his head towards the table he’d been staying at all night. “We’re about to play a drinking game. Come on.” He looked to Sakura with a wink. “I want to show these losers how a real shinobi holds their liquor.”
Shikamaru shook his head, giving him an apologetic smile. “I’d actually like to be awake for your wedding which might not happen if we don’t get some sleep soon. We didn’t get much on the way over.”
Kankuro sighed, glancing at Sakura as he said, “Alright, I get it.” He took a step back and pointed a finger at him. “But you’re drinking with me tomorrow.” Then, at Sakura. “You too.”
Shikamaru chuckled and Sakura smiled. “Sure, Kankuro.”
***
Sakura rolled her eyes at Shikamaru’s hesitation at the foot of the bed. “Shikamaru, it’s a king-sized bed. If you even suggest sleeping on – “
Shikamaru shook his head as he moved to get under the sheets beside her. “I wasn’t going to.”
Sakura smiled and didn’t comment on the lie. “Good.”
Despite some of the nerves she had earlier, there really wasn’t any reason to be nervous. The bed was huge. Another person could even fit in between her and Shikamaru. It almost felt weird to be so far from each other in the same bed. Sakura couldn’t help but inch just a little closer to him laying on her side as he made himself comfortable on his back.
She tugged the covers better over her shoulder. “Do you always sleep on your back?”
Shikamaru glanced at her and shrugged against the mattress. “Sometimes. I’ll probably move a little in my sleep by morning.”
Sakura hummed in response, her eyes following Shikamaru’s hands as he adjusted the covers over him. They were quiet for a moment, the moonlight from the window softly painting across their bed. She didn’t know if he’d answer, but she still had to ask what had been nagging at her since agreeing to come on this trip. She wagered that if he didn’t want to, he could pretend he was asleep – even though she could tell he wasn’t – and she would let the subject drop.
Her voice was quiet but sounded ridiculously loud in the dead of night. “Why didn’t you and Temari ever get together?”
She was thankful he didn’t pretend he was asleep. His expression was unreadable as he opened his eyes to glance at her and then looked up at the ceiling. He sighed and told her, “We… talked about it a few years ago, but decided not to.”
Decided?
“Why not?”
“Well, neither of us wanted to give up our homes.” Shikamaru’s eyes were distant as he answered, and Sakura couldn’t let it bother her since she was the one to bring up things in the past. “It was what would eventually happen if we stayed together so… to avoid any heartbreak, we just decided not to.”
Sakura didn’t reply, wondering how she should reply. How would Ino respond? Someone who didn’t have feelings for him? All she felt was thankful nothing had happened between them, then horrible for being so selfish. She started to feel awkward for broaching the subject when she was apparently not even comfortable enough to give a proper response.
“I don’t really know what to say,” she admitted with an embarrassed smile.
“I mean you don’t really have to say anything.” Shikamaru chuckled and turned his head towards her, strands of his hair falling to his neck without the ponytail. Sakura’s heart clenched painfully in her chest at the expression on his face; his brown eyes so warm she wanted to fall into them, the gentle curve of his lips.
“I’m glad you stayed in Konoha,” she eventually replied, her smile more sincere as she met his eyes.
Shikamaru’s face softened and he told her in a voice barely above a whisper, “Me too.”
Sakura let her heavy eyes close as she sighed against her pillow, “Goodnight, Shika.”
She heard his warm voice reply as sleep caught her, “Goodnight, Sakura.”
Sakura woke up shivering, tightening the covers around her to no avail. She glanced at the window to see it was still dark outside. She hated the freezing temperatures of the desert.
Shikamaru was fast asleep next to her, having moved to his side in the middle of the night with his face on the edge of the pillow. It felt like he radiated warmth and if Sakura didn’t feel so cold that it almost hurt, she would’ve felt creepy about how she inched even closer to him. It was only slightly better, and she adjusted the covers more around them.
Shikamaru shifted in his sleep at the movement and rolled to his other side. Without thinking, Sakura’s fingers reached out to grip at his shirt before he could move too far away. She instantly regretted it as he stilled. His voice was tired as he looked over his shoulder at her. “Sakura?”
“Sorry,” Sakura blurted out, even her breath felt cold as it passed through her lips. She hugged the covers closer to her shaking chest. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to wake you up.”
She didn’t know what kind of expression she had but it made Shikamaru roll back to face her. His hand went to her arm – kami, was he a fucking furnace? – as he looked at her in worry. “What’s wrong?”
“I’m cold.” Sakura closed her eyes, wishing she didn’t sound like a whining two-year-old.
She felt his hand cup her face and then he let out a sigh. A second later and he was slipping out of the bed. Sakura opened her eyes as she felt the mattress move from his weight leaving it. She looked over to see him shuffling through his bag. “Shikamaru?”
He pulled out a scroll and she watched as he opened it, retrieving a large blanket from it. He gave her a small smile as he walked back to the bed, spreading the blanket out over her. Sakura was surprised by the weight of it, instantly feeling ten degrees warmer. Shikamaru climbed back under the blankets, making himself comfortable beside her. His smile felt loving as he opened his arms for her. “Come here.”
Sakura closed the distance between them, burying her face against his neck as her arms snaked around him and pulled him as close as she could. She slotted a leg between his and sighed contently, her embarrassment and nerves left on the other side of the bed. He was so warm.
Shikamaru chuckled lowly and Sakura loved how she could feel the vibrations from his chest against her. He tucked the blankets around them almost covering her completely, and then wrapped his arms around her, holding her close to him. He teased her, “No hesitation huh?”
Sakura felt incapable of being teased with how comfortable she was. She could leave any embarrassment for the morning. Her tone was almost mad as she told him, “You’re so fucking warm.”
He laughed and Sakura smiled against his neck as he leaned his head against hers. He didn’t respond and Sakura felt herself falling asleep again. She mumbled between them, “Thank you, Shika,” before she lost all train of thought.
***
As the temperature rose in the morning, they drifted away from each other but not completely. Sakura’s foot was wrapped around Shikamaru’s ankle and he had an arm around her waist. She woke up slowly as she felt the sunlight on her face and smiled at seeing Shikamaru sleeping with his forehead pressed against hers.
Sakura closed her eyes again with all the intention of going back to sleep. The wedding was in the evening and Sakura had set the alarm clock for around noon, so if it hadn’t gone off, she was going to get all the sleep she could.
That was the plan until she heard the knock at the front door. She sighed and made a move to get out of the bed. But Shikamaru’s arm tightened around her holding her in place. He mumbled against the pillow, “Just ignore them, they’ll go away.”
Sakura chuckled and like the person had heard him, the knocking increased. Shikamaru peaked an eye at her and she shrugged. He sighed and let go of her, getting out of the bed himself and going through the front room to the door.
She heard a familiar voice after the sound of the door opening as she rolled out from under the sheets. Her feet had barely touched the floor when Temari was poking her head around the doorway. She had her usual smirk on her face and Sakura expected a teasing remark when her eyes fell on the bed. But then Temari’s face turned apologetic. “I’m sorry, I didn’t know you guys were still sleeping.”
Sakura shrugged and offered her a smile. “Don’t worry about it.” She eyed Temari’s sweats and wet hair. She looked like she’d just woken up too. Sakura hadn’t thought about it before but Temari probably also lived here in the Kazekage residence. “What were you needing?”
Temari leaned her shoulder against the doorway and looked at her almost shy. “I was wondering if you would do my hair and makeup? You and Ino always look like you know what you’re doing, and I thought since this is my own brother’s wedding, I should probably try.”
Sakura nodded, her expression becoming fond. “Sure.”
Temari seemed to relax and she held up a small bag. “I don’t have much, but I’m sure it’s fine.”
Sakura stepped towards her bag as Shikamaru walked into the room. “We can use what I brought too. I don’t mind sharing.”
Shikamaru called over his shoulder as he stepped into the bathroom. “I’m going to take a quick shower.”
Temari stepped back into the front room and Sakura followed – closing the door behind her – with her own bag. Temari sat cross legged on the floor and Sakura felt herself smile in excitement as she knelt beside her searching through her bag. She hadn’t got to play with makeup on someone in a while. It reminded her of after the war when Ino kept using her as a doll on the guise of teaching her as they settled easily back into their childhood friendship. But Sakura had still enjoyed it.
Sakura glanced at Temari as she pulled out a hair dryer. “What were you wanting to do with your hair? I have a hair dryer but not any curling cream.”
Temari looked through her own small bag. “I have some if you want to leave it down. You can honestly do whatever you want.”
Sakura reached out to feel Temari’s hair – still pretty wet. “Okay, then let’s do that. I think we have time to do your makeup before it dries and we have to put it up.”
Temari nodded and grabbed some pins to pull her hair away from her face. She gave Sakura a small smile as she moved in front of her. “Thank you for helping me out.”
“No problem. I think it’s fun.” Sakura gave her a smile and started to pull out things from Temari’s makeup bag.
They fell into a comfortable silence with Sakura only speaking to give instructions for Temari to move this way and that. It was nice. She didn’t think she had spent too much one-on-one time with Temari. She’d always considered her a friend, but it had mainly been because of association with her other friends. Even with her growing feelings for Shikamaru, Sakura did like Temari. She just didn’t know her very well.
Sakura distantly heard the sound of the shower shutting off and she glanced at the closed doors before looking back to Temari. “Why’d you ask me and not one of your other friends?”
If Sakura hadn’t been so close to Temari, she might not have noticed her hesitation before she answered, “Not many of them really dress up and besides you were closer. I live upstairs.”
It didn’t feel like the whole answer, but Sakura shrugged it off and moved on to pick colors from an eyeshadow palette. The sliding doors opened, and Sakura paused to look up at Shikamaru as he walked over towards them. She felt her heart skip a beat at his warm expression and she smiled in response.
He glanced at Temari and she instantly warned, “Not a word.”
He chuckled and rolled his eyes. “Wasn’t going to say anything.”
Sakura laughed lightly and Shikamaru leaned down to tell her, “I was going to go get us breakfast so you can have your girl talk in peace.”
Sakura chuckled, her heart going out of rhythm with how close his smile was. “I could eat.”
He glanced at Temari. “Want anything?”
She shook her head and Sakura felt dazed as Shikamaru pressed a kiss to her cheek before walking towards the door. Sakura’s eyes followed him as he closed the door, heat rising in her cheeks. “I’ll be back then.”
When she turned back to Temari, the woman was still staring at the closed door. “Temari?”
Temari looked back to her and asked with a serious tone, her eyebrows pulling together. “Sakura, we’re okay, right?”
It took a second for Sakura to realize what she meant, and she felt something like a noose tighten around her chest. She nodded with a soft laugh. “Yes, we’re okay, Temari. I wouldn’t be helping you if we weren’t.”
She broke away from her gaze to search for nothing in a makeup bag. Temari’s eyes were still on her as her voice quietened. “Did he tell you?”
“He did.” Sakura kept her face nonchalant as she motioned for Temari to close her eyes, raising a brush. Temari looked at her like she knew what she was doing but complied without complaint.
A few seconds passed and she told her, “I got over him a while after that. I don’t mean to bring up the past but I just don’t want you to be worrying about it.”
Sakura swallowed what felt like guilt down her throat. Was it really okay to be lying to Temari like this? They had done all of this to keep people from pushing Shikamaru and Temari together. So, why couldn’t they tell Temari? Well, it wasn’t like Shikamaru had said to not tell her…
Sakura cleared her throat and blurted out, “Shikamaru brought me as a date because he said it would stop people from bugging you two about getting together.”
Temari’s eyelids twitched as she almost opened them but quickly remembered not to unless she wanted powder in her eyes. “Are you… implying you’re not together then?”
“Yes.” Sakura let out a short breath and then felt a hand on hers before she could apply more powder.
Temari looked at her with a smirk. “I don’t believe you.”
Sakura let out a surprised laugh. “What? Why would I lie – “
“You act like you are.” Temari raised an eyebrow at her.
“Well, that’s part of – “
Temari shook her head. “No, outside of that. It’s like – I don’t know – the way you are around each other when you think no one’s looking. There’s something there.”
Sakura felt a blush blossom on her cheeks and Temari laughed in response. “Come on, Sakura. You’re not going to try and tell me you don’t like him, are you?”
Sakura bit her lip and looked to the side, which was answer enough. Temari chuckled and then after a moment said, “I can’t believe you were just going to walk out in a towel on the poor guy. I would’ve never expected you to be so bold.”
Sakura’s head whipped back to her and she tried to defend herself, her blush crawling down her neck. “I forgot my clothes in the room!”
Temari laughed and teased her, “Sure.”
Sakura huffed and snapped, “Shut up and close your eyes so I can finish your makeup.”
Temari grinned but didn’t argue any further.
***
Sakura mentioned it as casually as she could while she touched her hair up in the bathroom mirror, calling out into the bedroom, “I told Temari by the way.”
There was a pause from the other side of the wall and then a confused, “Why?”
Sakura hated how she couldn’t hide the sliver of sadness in her voice as she replied, “It – it just felt wrong to lie to her. I didn’t think you’d mind.”
Sakura busied herself with putting her earrings on when she heard the sound of the mattress moving. She kept her eyes on her fingers in the mirror as Shikamaru leaned against the doorway behind her. “Sakura, I don’t have feelings for Temari anymore.”
Sakura’s head felt cloudy as relief filled it and she forced out a response. “I – That’s good. I just thought since the whole reason you did this – that you wouldn’t mind.” Great job on acting casual, Sakura.
She risked a glance at Shikamaru, and he shrugged, rubbing the back of his neck. “I mean yeah, I don’t really mind. I just didn’t think you were close enough to Temari to care about a white lie.”
Sakura’s eyes went back to herself as she put the other earring on. She told a half lie of her own. “A little, I guess.”
Shikamaru opened his mouth to say something and Sakura interrupted with a smile, gently pushing him out the door. “Well, go get ready, Shikamaru. I don’t want to be late.”
She heard him scoff but he listened and walked away, letting the subject fall. “We have like two hours.”
“Shika, can you get my – “ Sakura walked into the room holding her dress to her chest as the sleeves slipped from her shoulders. She felt her voice cut off as her eyes landed on Shikamaru straightening his tie, having changed into his clothes like Sakura asked. She felt just as pleasantly surprised as she did at the shop. She would probably die from heart damage if she had to see him like this for more than a day.
He looked over at her as he smoothed the tie down and raised an eyebrow. “Hm?”
She was so utterly fucked.
She smiled and stepped over to him, gesturing to her back. “Can you get my zipper?”
He nodded and Sakura’s heart raced as his fingers pinched at the fabric on her lower back as he pulled the zipper carefully up. He asked her, his voice feeling warm and quiet in their room, “I thought you said you brought a long-sleeved dress.”
Sakura sighed. “I did, but it tore on a loose shuriken in my bag. I had to wear my backup.” She’d never been so thankful for packing an extra outfit before. The dress she had on was similar, the same color just cut differently. The other dress would’ve been warmer, but she preferred this to going to a local dress shop and trying to find a dress on the day of the Kazekage’s brother’s wedding.
Shikamaru snorted, moving to stand next to her. He smirked as he teased her, “You brought a backup dress?”
“Yes, for instances exactly like this.” Sakura chuckled and then poked him in the chest.
His face softened as he looked down at her and it made Sakura realize how close they were. You’d think after being cuddled against him all night she wouldn’t be so self-conscious about it, but she was. “Well, when you get cold, let me know and you can wear my jacket.”
Sakura rolled her eyes as she mindlessly fixed Shikamaru’s pocket square, though she felt warm just at the thought. “I don’t get cold all the time.”
Shikamaru snorted and then wrapped his hand around her fingers and pulled her towards the door. “Sure, Sakura-chan.”
***
Sakura would probably always be bias about Konoha weddings being the most beautiful, but there was something to be said about a Suna wedding. The colors were so warm and though she had always thought of sand being gritty, it felt so soft here. Even the local flowers were beautiful where they were placed around the ceremony. Dark reds and purples seemed to be the common theme and Sakura decided they did look romantic.
She didn’t cry like Shikamaru had teased her she would in a whisper near her ear – and hadn’t that sent shivers down her spine. She was happy for her friend though and more than a little touched to see Kankuro tearing up at the sight of Minorin in her wedding kimono.
The reception though didn’t feel any different from a Konoha one; people dancing, drinking, and congratulating the happy couple. They had already given their congratulations and escaped to a quieter area of the large party that seemed to fill the street more with each minute.
After a while, Shikamaru left her for a moment to go get them some drinks after the bar had calmed down. It wasn’t even a few minutes later and someone was leaning close to her. She took a step to the side as she glanced at a man giving her a charming smile – he reminded her a bit of Genma with the way he quirked his lips in a way he probably thought was very sexy. Sakura gave him a polite smile and nod, ready to go back to watching Temari twirling Gaara hilariously across the dance floor.
The man stepped closer to her again and Sakura felt an ounce of irritation stiring in her throat. She looked at him with a raised eyebrow and he told her, “I thought I’d ask you for a dance. Name’s Daiki.”
Sakura shook her head, an apologetic smile on her face. “Thanks for the offer, but I’m here with someone.”
Daiki instantly leaned away from her but did cock an eyebrow at her, not moving from beside her. “I can take a no, though I am wondering if you’re telling the truth or not.”
Sakura chuckled. “I am –“ She cut off as an arm wrapped around her waist and she was tugged back against a chest. A drink slipped into her hand as Shikamaru sighed. “Daiki, can you really not keep it in your pants for five minutes?”
Daiki laughed as he met Shikamaru’s eyes and cocked an eyebrow. “Oh, are you about to tell me you’re this beautiful woman’s date then?”
Sakura took a drink from her cup with a smile as she glanced up at Shikamaru. He looked annoyed but Sakura could see the muscle in his cheek twitch. They must be friends.
“You don’t even know her name, do you?”
Daiki shrugged with a grin. “Don’t change the subject.”
Shikamaru chuckled and Sakura told Daiki, “Haruno Sakura.”
He rolled his eyes at Shikamaru and then bowed his head to her. “Sato Daiki. Now, Shikamaru –“
“Yes, Daiki, Sakura’s my date.” Shikamaru took a drink from his own cup and Sakura felt her heart skip a beat as his thumb stroked across her hip where he held her.
Daiki hummed and glanced to Sakura. A second passed before he shrugged a shoulder and asked, “So, Temari’s free reign then, huh?”
Shikamaru sighed. “She always has been. Though, I suggest you keep that phrasing to yourself.”
Daiki laughed and took a step back. He shot Sakura his charming smile and winked. “Well, if you get bored of him, come find me.”
Sakura laughed lightly and gave him a nod if only to hear the way Shikamaru scoff near her ear. She watched him disappear into the crowd and then leaned back into Shikamaru as she looked up at him with a raised eyebrow. “Possessive, aren’t we?”
Something warm and light danced inside her chest at Shikamaru’s barely concealed blush. He shrugged and took a drink. He made the same comparison she had. “Daiki is the Sand version of Genma. He flirts with just about anything that walks.”
Sakura hummed into her sake. “He seems a little goofier than Genma.”
Shikamaru chuckled and nodded, then leaned his back against the wall behind them Sakura easily following him. “A clumsy playboy.”
“You seem like good friends,” Sakura commented idly.
“I guess.” Shikamaru’s eyes wandered over the dancing bodies in thought. “He used to work with Temari and helped out with the Sand council a lot when I was here.”
Sakura had always known Shikamaru was close with the Sand, but she hadn’t ever thought about why. “Everyone seems to know you so well. How often did you come here when we were younger?”
“Well, a lot actually. You know Temari and I were both proctors for the chunnin exams when we were teenagers? Because of how well we got a long and how familiar I was with the Sand, the Hokage thought it would be a good idea for me to be one of the diplomats that came here. Before the war and a little after it, I had to come here a lot to go over things about the alliance.” His voice was a low hum near her ear and Sakura felt herself melt as he talked. “They still had some structural faults from the Yodaime Kazekage. I helped them rework some of their mission system and their training regime.”
Sakura leaned her head against Shikamaru’s chin as something twisted unpleasantly in her stomach. She smiled as she breathed out. “No wonder they all want you to marry Temari. It’s so you’ll stay.”
Shikamaru chuckled and Sakura felt that something in her stomach uncoil as his arm tightened around her. “At the end of the day, I’m a Leaf shinobi and don’t have any plans on changing that.”
Sakura’s smile was more sincere as she mumbled, “Their loss then.”
***
She wouldn’t say the party had calmed down over the next couple of hours, but it had dimmed slightly as a lot of the civilians slipped back to their houses leaving mainly shinobi and friends and family of the happy couple.
The temperature had begun its drop and without any comment, Shikamaru had taken off his jacket. Sakura let him thread her arms through the sleeves, her cheeks dusting pink to match her dress. He gave her a teasing smirk when she pulled it around her, and Sakura rolled her eyes.
“I could just take it back?” Shikamaru cocked an eyebrow at her.
Sakura bit back a smile and bumped her arm with his. “Or you could go make us some plates while I find somewhere to sit?”
Shikamaru chuckled. “Alright.” She felt his lips brush her temple before he was walking away from her, slipping through the throngs of people to get to the buffet table.
Sakura’s heart felt tight as she watched him disappear and she let out a steadying breath as she turned in the other direction. They had set up tables almost at random around the street. Sakura didn’t see any free tables but wasn’t antisocial enough to eat standing up to avoid talking to someone. She put on a sweet smile as she walked over to the least busy table.
Two older women were siting there, talking quietly amongst themselves. They looked up at Sakura as her fingers settled over a chair. “Excuse me, but would either of you mind if my date and I joined you?”
They gave her kind smiles and shook their heads. The one with the curly hair told her gently, “Not at all, dear.”
The other one had a louder personality and said, “If you don’t mind sitting with a couple of old tits that is.”
Sakura smiled as the other woman laughed and hit her friend on the shoulder. “I think you’ll be great company.”
Sakura pulled back a chair to sit down and bowed her head slightly. “I’m Haruno Sakura.”
“Hata Emi.”
“Jo Miyu.”
Sakura nodded and Miyu glanced her over, then raised a thin eyebrow. “My dear, you should’ve worn something warmer. The nights get cold here.”
Sakura felt comforted by the maternal voice and figured Miyu probably had grandchildren. “I brought something warmer, but it got damaged on the way.” She tugged Shikamaru’s jacket sleeves back as they fell over her hands.
Emi hummed and wagged a finger at her. “Well, good thing your date is a gentleman.”
Sakura felt her cheeks warm as she smiled, glancing down to cuff the sleeves so they stopped bothering her. “He is. I’m lucky to have him in my life.”
She heard Emi chuckle but before she could say anything, she felt someone behind her place their hands on the back of her chair. “I see you’ve found definitely the most entertaining people to sit with.”
Sakura leaned her head back in time for Shikamaru to bend down and press a kiss against her purple seal. Sakura’s heart went erratic as he placed food in front of her and moved to sit beside her. He was going to slowly kill her with all these chaste kisses. Before she could remind herself they didn’t mean anything, she heard Emi chide Shikamaru, “Bout time you came by to say hello.”
Shikamaru laughed softly and Sakura’s grip on her chopsticks faltered when he put a hand on her leg, his fingers curling around the inside of her leg. She felt a rush of heat flood through her from his hand on her bare skin. “How have you two been? I was looking for Ren earlier but didn’t see him.”
Emi’s face softened and she told him, “He wasn’t feeling up to it today, so he stayed home with the promise of me getting lots of pictures.”
Shikamaru replied in a kind voice, “I hope he feels better. Tell him I’m sorry I missed him.”
She smiled back with a small nod and Shikamaru leaned towards Sakura. “Emi is Hata Ren’s wife. I worked with him a lot when I was a teenager.”
Sakura nodded and then Miyu spoke up, leaning forward on the table. “What did you say your family name was?”
Sakura swallowed her water and then answered, “Haruno.”
She smiled and leaned back against her chair. “So, you’re that Sakura. The name wasn’t clicking with me earlier but once I noticed your purple diamond…”
Sakura smiled back, not really knowing how to respond. Quiet a few of the Sand, recognized her from the tale of her saving Kankuro. But even after experiencing the admiration and gratitude all these years, she still didn’t know how to react to it. “That would be me.”
“Well, it is an honor to meet you.” She jerked her head towards Shikamaru. “I take it Shikamaru-kun was the gentleman you were speaking about earlier?”
Sakura’s smile warmed. “Yes, he is.”
Shikamaru turned to her with a teasing smile, leaning close. “Were you talking about me, Sakura-chan?”
“Yeah, I was telling them about how your hair sticks up at weird angles in the morning.” Sakura teased back and pushed his face away with her hand, making him laugh.
They made idle chat with the two women, Temari and a couple of her friends eventually joining them. Even after the plates were cleared and they leaned back in their chairs with drinks, Shikamaru’s hand remained on her thigh. Sakura felt increasingly aware of him as the night wore on; his thumb stroking across her skin, how he’d moved his chair closer to hers when the air started to get cold, where her leg pressed against his, how she couldn’t stop herself from leaning close to him as she talked.
At some point, Shikamaru leaned close to her ear as the table was enraptured by one of Temari’s stories. His breath was warm against her skin as he told her, “I’m going to have a quick smoke. I’ll be right back.”
Even as her heart skipped a beat at his easy smile, she narrowed her eyes at him. “I thought you were trying to quit.”
“I’ve cut back.” He shrugged with an easy smile. “One day at a time, Sakura.”
Sakura sighed and relented, “Alright.”
He squeezed her thigh before slipping away from the table and Sakura barely quieted the sound in her throat. He shot her a smirk as he walked away and she glared at him, feeling her cheeks redden.
Temari’s friend from the night before – her name was Saya – pulled her into a conversation a moment later. Sakura tried to keep up with her, pushing distracting thoughts of Shikamaru’s smile and hands to the back of her mind. She was vaguely aware that Shikamaru had been gone a while but didn’t feel concerned until Temari leaned over and asked her, “Hey, where’d Nara go?”
“He said he was just having a quick smoke…” Sakura glanced around the crowd not spotting him. She stood up from her chair and gave them a small smile. “I’ll go see if I can find him. I’ll be right back.”
Sakura walked through the crowd, looking for that spiky ponytail as she skillfully moved around dancing bodies. She finally found him near a building to the side of the bar talking to an older man. Something loosened in her chest as she smiled and made her way to him. As she got closer, she realized how tense his shoulders were and how he clenched his fist in his pockets.
“I don’t understand why you kids never got together,” the older man spoke, and Sakura noticed how his words slurred together.
“We just didn’t,” his voice was exasperated, and he sighed. “Look, oji-san, I’m here with someone else and it’s getting ridiculous how far you’re – “
“What’s so special about her?”
She felt her feet stop a few paces away, the wind picking up around her ankles. She really didn’t want to hear any more commentary on Shikamaru’s non-relationship with Temari. Maybe she should go back to the table…
Sakura made a move to turn back when Shikamaru’s voice stopped her.
“I love her.”
Sakura felt something cold wrap around her that had nothing to do with the desert wind. It was hard to breathe and a sole thought ran through her mind.
She had to get out of there.
Sakura moved with less grace than earlier and almost made someone fall as she pushed past them in any direction beside the one behind her. They shouted at her and she later realized it was what had drawn his attention to the pink hair trying to escape through the sea of bodies.
“Sakura!”
Sakura ignored him, feeling her heart clench painfully in her chest. Her pace fastened as she tried to lose him in the crowd. She could feel tears starting to well up in her eyes even as she smiled politely at strangers as she moved by them. She’d made it to a building on the edge of the party and was about to escape through the space between it and another when a hand caught hers. The jolt of her being yanked back caused her tears to spill over.
Shikamaru’s eyes were wide as he met hers and she could see how hard he was breathing by the way his chest moved. “Sakura, that – “
She cut him off angrily and bit out barely minding to keep her voice low, not wanting to cause a scene, “Don’t say that. Don’t lie about that kind of thing. How can you just – that’s just cruel.”
“Sakura, I – “ His hands were on her, trying to pull her close and Sakura ripped herself away. If she had been looking at his face, she would’ve seen the pain that was tearing at her reflected in his eyes.
“Don’t. Not – not for them. I can’t handle it anymore, Shika.” She turned around and slipped between the buildings, the walls cold around her as she moved. She had no idea where she was going or even where she was, but her feet carried her way.
Her tears begin to cloud her vision as she walked, and she was thankful for how empty the street was. Thoughts raced through her mind, each of them battling for dominance at the forefront.
He doesn’t.
To just lie like –
She lost him.
He doesn’t know, it’s not like he meant to –
She was so selfish.
That was just too far.
She should’ve just held it in.
How could he ever –
Sakura was caught by surprise as hands grabbed her and pushed her against a wall. She barely made out Shikamaru’s warm brown eyes before lips were pressed against hers. Sakura gasped into his mouth and he pressed closer against her. The feelings that rushed through her, a mix of hope and want made her close her eyes. For a few seconds, she kissed him back, her hands gripping at his shirt to drag him even closer. But then, she came to her senses and broke away from him, opening her eyes.
Shikamaru caught her hands before she could push him away and lowered his head to meet her eyes. His smile was nervous, and his voice breathless if not a little panicked. “Sakura, look around. No one’s here. It’s just you and me.”
Sakura glanced around like he said, her fingers relaxing in his shirt. Her heart rate picked up and she knew she must look like a mess as her eyes went back to his uncertain.
“I was selfish bringing you here.” He breathed out as his hands let go of hers and fell to her waist. “I took advantage of you even if I didn’t mean to and – “
“What’re you trying to say?” Sakura’s voice was soft, trying to not let hope consume her, though it was already slipping between the spaces between her ribs.
There was a pause filled with only the sound of the wind picking up sand and gently throwing it against buildings. Then, he smiled at her and it filled her with so much warmth she thought she might actually melt into a pool in his arms. “I love you, Sakura. I have for a while now and I’m sorry you had to hear me say it to someone else. But it’s true.” His face leaned closer to hers, just a breath’s away as his voice quietened to a soft murmur. “Every time I’ve looked at you. Every time I’ve touched you. Every kiss against your skin. None of it has been for them, Sakura. I’ve been coveting every second for myself in case I can never have them again. I’ve been so selfish.”
Sakura closed the distance between them, her arms locking around his neck. She couldn’t describe it well, but it felt like something dropped and shattered against the ground as his arms wrapped around her and held her close, his mouth warm and welcoming. He tasted like sake and the cigarettes she hated. She was flush against him with his arm around her waist as his other hand came up to hold her face. His thumb wiped away already dried tears on her cheeks and a faint voice in the back of her head wished she didn’t look like a crying mess.
His breathless laugh as they broke apart for air made her smile, squeezing her heart pleasantly. She leaned her forehead against his and told him words for only his ears, “And here I thought I was the selfish one. I love you, too.”
Later that night, Sakura caught Temari’s smile going soft as she watched Shikamaru wrap his hands around Sakura’s, cupping them to blow hot air across her palms.