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Since that distant Christmas night, Shibuya's skies are mostly clear. On the days when the clouds are not gray and heavy, beautiful clear blue colors the firmament. There's no thick smog and birds can be spotted. However, Guren finds that he prefers the obscure navy of the night and the stars that embellish the wastelands in which mankind somehow still manages to survive.
He likes the calm and the silence that takes over the city once the sun sets and the soldiers head back home. There are still some windows that radiate light, but the knows that the headquarters of the JIDA are almost empty. He rarely gets time to appreciate the silence of the world like this. Sure, he knows that he should probably be working on finishing the reports and documents that he still has to revise, but he takes a moment to relax and indulge in the peaceful feeling that accompanies the fresh breeze, the dim light and the strands of smoke rising from the lit cigarette that he holds between his fingers. He doesn't know if this will be last time he'll have the chance to do so, after all.
Footsteps behind him disturb the quietness, but Guren doesn't bother looking back. He brings the cigarette to his mouth, taking a drag from it. His throat stings as the smoke fills and burns his lungs, and after a few seconds, he exhales a puff of white smoke that disappears in the night air. His gaze is still locked on the sky when Shinya approaches him. He stands by his side as he always does, wearing a smile on his face.
"Isn't it late for you to still be here?" Shinya asks, tilting his head a bit.
"I could ask you that same question." He says, finally turning his sight to Shinya. He has his silver-white hair slicked back, probably from the formal meeting he had to attend earlier. This last week has been tough for both of them. With Guren having to fill piles of reports and plan strategies for their next mission and Shinya having to fulfill his own responsibilities as a member of the Hiiragi family, there had been little to no opportunity to see each other. Guren will never say out loud that he misses Shinya's company when he's not there. He's happy to see him, if only for a short while. "So? What is the oh-so-powerful Hiiragi-sama doing in the mortal realms this late?" he continues, raising an eyebrow in feigned apathy. Shinya laughs quietly and shrugs.
"I was just passing by and thought that I could lend you a hand since your slow ass never seems to get the paperwork done in time." He answers, clearly amused by the way Guren rolls his eyes at his comment. It is nice to see him smile for real, if only for a second.
Shinya is hard to read most of the time. He is always composed and hardly ever shows any vulnerability, even though Guren knows that life isn't any easier for him. Tonight, Shinya looks tired. He probably just finished his own pile paperwork and was heading home before finding him outside of the quarters. Dealing with the Hiiragis is no easy task. He wonders if Shinya had been actually getting enough sleep these days. Guren doesn't want him to stay any later just to help him with the stupid paperwork, but he has to admit that he appreciates that Shinya is always there, willing to do more than he is required to. That before and after the apocalypse, Shinya's always got his back.
"I didn't ask for your help."
"I know. That's what makes me such a good friend."
Guren can't help but chuckle at Shinya's answer. He takes another drag from his cigarette, knowing that at this point Shinya will most likely refuse to leave even if he asks him to.
"Besides, Guren, you won't be able to properly lead your tropes if you don't get any sleep tonight. You'll get everyone killed." Shinya then adds, his smile fading from his face.
Guren is fairly aware that Shinya is right. Sleep deprivation and a battlefield never go well together. Still, he doesn't want to make him stay. Not when he knows that Shinya will stubbornly follow him into the front line too, even when the has no obligation to do so. Guren smiles faintly. He's so grateful for him.
"Screw that." He says "Let's just go home now." Shinya seems about to protest but Guren talks before he can say anything. "Don't worry about the paperwork, I'll just find some time tomorrow morning. There's not that much left anyway."
Shinya gives him a sharp look and sighs, deciding to go along with it. Guren is probably lying, but he won't insist, and being honest, he's exhausted.
"Fine."
Shinya stretches and follows Guren. The latter still holds the cigarette between his fingers. Shinya frowns, pointing it.
"Hey, throw that away, man. You'll waste your demon's energy in just healing your lungs. You're a walking chimney lately."
Once again, Shinya is right. Guren sighs and heads to a near trashcan to quench and discard the cig. When he joins Shinya again, they start making their way back. After a moment, Guren stops and grabs Shinya's shoulder.
"Wait a sec." He murmurs, reaching for Shinya's slicked-back hair. Guren gently brushes the silver strands with his fingers, disheveling them back into the style that Shinya usually wears. "That's better."
"What was that for?" Shinya asks, throwing him a confused look. Guren just resumes his walk.
"Nothing. Let's go."
Guren's place is nearer to the JIDA quarters than the Hiiragi Manor. Shinya doesn't mind this, as he'd pretty much rather staying at Guren's place any day than going back. It is not the first time that he's stayed for the night at Guren's apartment, and if they survive tomorrow's mission, it will certainly not be the last one either. None of them keep track of how many times they've stayed together and none of them ever question it. They've both grown used to it, at this point, Guren thinks it feels way odder when he has to sleep alone. He relishes Shinya's presence especially on the nights before a mission when falling asleep is particularly hard regardless of how tired he might be.
"Look who's back." Shinya lets out happily when they arrive at Guren's door and on the mat lays a black cat that blinks at them with wide amber eyes.
Shinya kneels and the cat lazily brings himself up and rubs his head against Shinya's leg, purring quietly. Shinya chuckles and gently scratches under the cat's chin.
"It's been a while, Curry."
"Curry?" Guren asks, raising a brow. Shinya barely even pays attention to him as he's very busy petting the little black fluff ball.
"Hey Guren, aren't you still too young to be having mental gaps? Curry is his name." He answers, carefully picking up the cat from the mat to let Guren open the doorway to the apartment.
"We didn't agree to something like that," He says with a frown while unlocking the gate.
"Oh, we didn't? Well, that's its name now" Shinya insists. He carries the cat inside of the room with him. After walking in and closing the door behind him, Guren takes off his gloves and reaches to briefly caress the cat's head. Curry leans into the caress in contentment and purrs. Guren can't help but smile.
"Whatever. Welcome back little one."
"His name is Curry" Shinya stresses again with a chuckle before putting the cat down. Guren just lets out a small annoyed sound and heads to the kitchen, sure to get some food for their small visitor.
Guren loves cats. Shinya knows it better than anyone. He would find him petting stray cats or feeding them every once in a while. And then, when one of the cats that Guren fed started to show up on his door almost every day, none of them opposed to letting the cat into the apartment every time he came, until with an unspoken agreement, it sorta became their pet. Though the cat never stays for too long before leaving and coming back whenever it pleases him, Shinya is glad that Guren has someone else to keep him company for a while when he can't.
Staying at Guren's place has become a sort of a routine for Shinya in the last few years. After Guren's gotten some leftover boiled chicken for the cat, he always asks Shinya if he's hungry and offers him something to eat though most of the time he declines. Then, he asks Shinya if he wants to take a shower, and if he does, Guren always tells him to go first and he showers afterward. He lends Shinya some comfortable clothes to sleep, though at that point, Shinya already keeps some of his own clothes at Guren's place. He also keeps his toothbrush, a couple of books, his favorite coffee grains, and some mugs with silly designs.
Shinya likes the familiarity of Guren's apartment, this place feels more like home than the cold manor where he's spent the last 10 years of his life.
Once they are done preparing for bed, Shinya opens the window just slightly cause he knows that Guren likes to have some fresh air entering the room. The night breeze is chilly, but he doesn't mind it too much, he has the soft blankets and Guren's warm embrace to keep him from being cold, anyway. Guren's bed is big enough for them both, but they still prefer to lie close to each other. Shinya covers himself up with the blankets and wraps his arms around Guren. He relaxes, taking in the well known, comforting sandalwood musk scent on Guren's bedsheets and sighs when Guren holds him close and he can bask on Guren's warmth, on the strong, calloused hands that have a surprisingly gentle touch and in the comfort of being by the side of the person he trusts with his life. Shinya feels the calmest and safest when they hold each other like this before falling asleep. As if the nightmares can't reach them, as if there is no war and no dangerous pointless mission waiting for them. As if they could sleep and wake up to a world that is not in ruins.
Shinya's eyes are heavy with fatigue but before his consciousness fades, he brings Guren's hand to his lips to places a soft kiss on it. He believes that as long as he can have this, their torn down wastelands will be more than enough for him.
Shinya wakes up a couple of hours before the sun starts to rise. He sighs heavily, at the realization that there is no real danger lurking in the dark of the room. He rarely has any pleasant dreams, nightmares haunt him most nights, but as terrible as it may sound, to a certain point, he's grown used to them. Panic usually fades quickly as soon as he opens his eyes and they start identifying the forms of the furniture and his hands can feel the softness of the sheets. However, tonight it he isn't awake because of his nightmares, but because the person on the other side of the bed stirs a little too much.
Guren looks tense and frowns in his sleep, his eyelashes flutter and he seems to try to mumble something. Shinya knows that he must be having nightmares too. And when he's there, he never lets Guren go through that alone.
He reaches out for him and shakes his arm softly until Guren's violet eyes snap wide open. Guren pants and blinks as if trying to assimilate what he's seeing and merge back into reality, leaving behind whichever bloody vision his demon crafted in his dreams.
"Guren. Look at me." Shinya says firmly. He cups his cheek to make sure that Guren will focus and listen to him. "You're safe. It's over now."
Guren nods a couple of times. Shinya's voice soothes him but he is still shaken, it takes him some time to start to catch back his breath and calm down.
"It's okay..." Shinya whispers, still caressing his face. Guren sighs and the initial terror finally seems to leave his body. He's still tensed up, but he looks aware now. Shinya keeps touching him delicately. He never tries to rush things or ask about what was Guren dreaming about, just as Guren never does when he's the one comforting Shinya. The only thing that matters in moments like these, is protecting and reassuring each other as they always do, not only on the battlefield but also in the vulnerability of their sleep. Guren sighs again.
"I'm sorry" Guren mumbles, shifting closer to him, but Shinya would never blame him.
"You don't need to apologize. It was just a nightmare..."
"Not because of that... " Guren interrupts and his voice breaks. He looks as if he is about to cry. But Guren is stubborn, he never cries, not in front of Shinya.
"It's okay..." Shinya repeats, wrapping his arms around Guren's waist and hugging him soundly. He has no idea about what is Guren apologizing for, but he decides not to read too much into it. Guren curls up in Shinya's chest and Shinya caresses his back and his hair, softly, silently, until Guren starts to relax again. There is no need for words for him to know that Guren must already be worried about the outcome of the mission, and that is the last thing that they need right now. Shinya holds him close until he feels Guren's breathing becoming steady and peaceful.
"Let's go back to sleep, okay?" Shinya tells him, quietly and Guren nods, hugging him tightly and letting the peace that Shinya gives him start to lull him back to sleep.
Guren can't help but feel grateful that despite all the things that are missing in the world, he still has Shinya's warmth with him.
Guren wakes up when the sun barely begins to rise. Shinya is not by his side on the bed but the strong smell of coffee and toasts lets him know that everything is fine. He gets out of bed and dresses himself up before walking into the bathroom to wash his face and teeth and fix his hair. On any other morning, the scent of coffee would've been soothing, but today, it makes him sick. He feels a hole in his stomach, as he does every morning before going outside o militarily operation.
When Guren walks into the kitchen, Shinya's already dressed on his uniform, only missing his heavy coat that hangs from the back of the chair in which he sits. Surprisingly, the black cat is still there, lying on Shinya's thighs, getting petted by him. There's still half a toast with strawberry jam on Shinya's plate and his cup of coffee still steamy. It is a lovely, peaceful sight and Guren cherishes it. He loves it when there are no dangers or enemies to be cautious of. When there's no need to pretend and no shows to fake, and Shinya can let his guard down and be himself. Shinya greets him with a smile and the weight that he feels on his shoulders almost disappears for a moment.
"Good morning, sleepyhead." Shinya says
"Morning" Guren greets back, smiling faintly. He heads to the cupboard and grabs a crystal glass that he fills with plain water. Shinya observes him and lightly frowns.
"You're not having a cup of coffee today?"
"I don't feel like it" he answers and Shinya stares at him, just as attentive as their cat.
Shinya knows that this is just how Guren acts before a mission. He shrugs, taking a sip from his coffee before carefully grabbing and placing the cat on the floor.
"Eh, you really are the worst. I even bothered brewing it for you and you're not drinking it." He chants playfully while standing up to grab another mug and serve coffee in it. Guren then watches from one corner of the kitchen how Shinya takes two new pieces of bread and places them on the toaster. While the bread warms up, Shinya walks to Guren and puts the cup of hot coffee on his hands.
"I told you I didn't..."
"You can't leave like this. You're more stupid than usual when you're hungry." Shinya interrupts. This is a common scenario for them as well. "At least drink this..."
Guren smiles, knowing that Shinya won't leave him alone until he drinks and eats something, so he gives up and takes a sip from his cup. He breathes in the strong smoky aroma of the beverage and savors the creamy bitterness and the slightly sweet note that fills his mouth. Shinya always makes really good coffee and he knows that Guren loves it. Still, Guren fakes a surprised tone.
"Oh, it is not too bad," He says and Shinya chuckles, kinda wanting to punch him.
"Good. I poisoned it." Shinya answers winking at him. Guren smiles and takes another sip. He feels a lot better, so when Shinya hands him a plate and tells him to eat, he doesn't complain. They both sit for a moment, eating and enjoying the bliss of their peaceful morning while they still can. Mornings like these makes a lot of the crap that they have to put up with every day worth it.
When they are done getting ready, the sky is still somewhat dark. Guren leaves some food and water for the cat outside of his door and then Shinya and he make their way back to the JIDA headquarters.
Guren still has some paperwork to finish and Shinya insists on helping him. They stay together as long as they can until the time arrives and Guren has to leave and lead his tropes on a raid to vampire territory.
Before Guren leaves his office, they hold each other in their arms for a moment. Guren is strong. Shinya really wants to trust that fact, but he needs to be a realist. This might as well be the last time that he'll get to hug his best friend, so he does. They always do this before any of them leave for a mission. They both absolutely refuse to the mere idea of being unable to at least saying a proper goodbye. Shinya tells Guren to be careful and wishes him good luck since he will only be able to catch up with them until that day's afternoon.
Guren nods and they part ways with the promise of finding each other later, on the battlefield.
However, that same night, Guren wishes that Shinya hadn't kept his promise.
"Shinya!" Guren shouts. He swings his sword, slaying another vampire that tries to attack them. He's beaten up, bruised and bleeding, and there's still a big number of those bloodsuckers surrounding them. "You need to get out of here!"
Some meters away from him, Shinya has no time to think. He needs to act quickly, disarming and impaling the vampires that come too near. As a long-range fighter, he is in clear disadvantage but that doesn't keep him from battling. He still shoots the vampires that are farther away, still protecting Guren, even when there is still a big group of vampires over him, even when his side hasn't stopped bleeding and he's starting to feel himself weaken.
"Shinya!"
"Shut up, Guren! There's too many of them! You won't make it alone!" He shouts just before pulling the trigger and exterminating three of his enemies.
Guren knows that Shinya is strong, he knows that Shinya is smart and can figure out a way of keeping up a fight. He wants so desperately to believe that Shinya can't get killed off easily by a filthy bloodsucker. But he still fears, he is still frantically trying to think of a way of getting themselves out of that dark dead-end so that Shinya can get his wounds treated. Guren curses his naivety. The horde of vampires had come as a final ambush after the big fight was supposedly over. The tropes had already split and in the confusion of it, Shinya and himself found themselves trapped on a dead-end, while his squad and some other soldiers fought outside. He hates himself for letting his guard down before time.
Guren peeks anxiously at Shinya, who keeps fighting as if nothing's wrong as if his white gloves are not becoming tainted in deep red every time he presses the wound in a futile try of stopping the heavy flowing of blood. Shinya is starting to struggle and Guren can't afford to let him defenseless. He feels guilty, he can't let them hurt Shinya any further, not when it was Shinya protecting him from a direct attack that caused such a bad injury. He needs to finish this business soon.
Guren takes the Cursed Gear Stimulants from his belt and gets one pill. He's only taken one pill today, having another one shouldn't be enough to kill him.
"Guren, don't!" Shinya pleas, but Guren ignores him. He rathers taking some more damage than risking to not being able to protect Shinya. He holds his sword tightly.
"Mahiru-no-Yo" He calls and counts to ten. The curse marks extend over his skin. He feels an overwhelming rush of power running through his body.
Shinya is concerned, but he can't afford to get himself too distracted so he keeps shooting. His head already feels dizzy and his breathing is unsteady. He is so going to beat Guren when this is over.
This has to be the coldest night that Guren can remember spending of outside human territory. He sits inside the tent where the wounded soldiers are being taken care of, he's exhausted. His body is covered in bruises, heavy and hurting. Even the slightest move he makes sends a sting through his fatigued muscles. Guren knows that his demon will heal him soon enough, but for the moment, it hurts. He wants to sleep so bad, but still, here he is. Sitting on beside the stretcher in which Shinya lies unconscious.
Shinya had collapsed from the blood loss shortly after they've managed to wipe off the horde of vampires that had attacked them. The wound on his side was deep and likely to leave a scar, however, it was not fatal. Guren could have cried from utter relief when the medical team bandaged Shinya's torso and assured that with the help of his demon, the recovering should not take too long. Being a black demon wielder does has some perks after all.
Guren is bandaged too. Apparently, he had passed out for a few minutes as well when the effect of the stimulants began to disappear. He is not nearly as wounded as the sniper is, but that's only thanks to Shinya, who protected him even when he was struggling to keep himself up. Guren really wants to go and get some rest but he can't bring himself to leave Shinya. Besides, he knows that it is his fault that he is in this state.
Guren closes his eyes for a moment but opens them immediately after a second when he hears the sigh that Shinya lets out.
Shinya opens his eyes slowly. An oil lamp is the only light source in the tent, so it takes him just a couple of seconds to get used to the illumination. He tries to sit up but a sharp pain on the right side of his torso stops him. He groans.
"Hey! Don't do that just yet!" Guren hurries to say, but Shinya pays no mind and sits up, flinching.
"How long... have I been out?" Shinya asks, ignoring Guren's word and frowning at the pain. His head is still dizzy but at least the wound is not bleeding anymore. He places his hand over the injury as if he could relieve the pain with that.
Guren wants to complain and make him lay back down into the stretcher, but he can't hide his relief at seeing that Shinya's finally awake.
"Just about an hour" He answers.
Shinya stays silent, he seems to be thinking of something; seemingly unaware of it, he bites his lips and swallows. Guren notices and reaches for the water flask on the bench beside him and passes it to Shinya.
"You need to lay down for longer, idiot. You'll hurt yourself."
"I don't want to hear that from you" Shinya states after taking the bottle. "You're lucky I can't beat the crap out of you right now"
He glares at Guren coldly. Guren can't blame him for being upset, he knows that his acts were reckless and risky. The acute pain that extends on his body every time he moves is the clear proof of that. Shinya continues talking.
"I knew you were an idiot, but what you did was really stupid."
Guren stays silent, once again, he knows that Shinya is right, but he doesn't regret his choice, not even a tiny bit; after all, the end of the world was never the thing that Guren feared the most. Shinya is alive and that's all that matters.
At the lack of an answer, Shinya sighs, finally breaking eye contact.
"Seriously, what were are you thinking?" He asks, noticeably still upset.
I was thinking of protecting you. Guren ponders but doesn't let the words be spoken. He doesn't care about how angry Shinya gets at him as long as it means that he'll be able to keep him safe
"I don't need you to risk your life protecting me. I need you to stay alive." Shinya mutters as if he had read Guren's mind. Their sights meet again and Guren knows that there is a fondness in his eyes. Shinya knows him really well. He can't afford to lose him again, ever.
"I'm sorry..." Guren whispers and Shinya looks away. He knows that apologizing isn't enough, but that's the only thing that he can do. Shinya sighs.
"Don't do something so reckless again" Guren nods and Shinya starts drinking from the water flask.
It is until a few minutes later that Guren speaks.
"How are your wounds?" He asks in a quiet voice.
"It should be okay by tomorrow. They still hurt now though. Concerned about me, Guren?"
"As if."
Guren answers and Shinya finally starts to give the hint of a smile. He looks drained. Guren can't help himself and reaches to carefully brush Shinya's bangs away from his eyes. Shinya catches his hand.
"What is that for?" He asks. Guren smiles at him. He's so happy that Shinya is okay.
"Nothing. I'll get you some food"
Shinya lets go of his hand and Guren stands up and goes out of the tent, coming back a few minutes later with the ration of dull canned food that they pack for their missions. While Shinya eats, Guren tells him about what happened in the time that he was unconscious thought most of it is not really relevant.
Once Shinya is done, they keep talking for a bit, checking on each other just to make sure that there is nothing to worry about. They allow themselves to calm down and take indulge in each other's company.
As they speak, Shinya extends his hand and touches Guren's fingers. Almost immediately, they are holding hands. As simple as that gesture is, it comforts both of them. Guren brings Shinya's hand to his lips and kisses it softly. They stay like that for a couple of minutes until Shinya speaks up again.
"I need some fresh air."
"What about your wounds?" Guren asks.
"It's not that bad anymore, can you help me?"
Guren nods in agreement and Shinya wraps his arm around Guren's shoulder to stand up and support his steps. Moving still makes him occasionally groan in pain, but they manage to get out of the tent and sit on the ground outside of it. A group of soldiers keeps a campfire a few meters away from the tent, but it is not big enough to provide them with enough heat. Shinya tugs at the blanket that Guren has wrapped around his shoulders.
"Guren, I'm cold."
"Go get a blanket then."
"You're an asshole."
"I'm still not giving you the blanket."
Shinya groans and prepares to stand up, but Guren doesn't lets him. He smiles dimly and hands Shinya the blanket, not minding being little colder, but Shinya wraps only half of it around himself and leaves the rest to Guren. The blanket is not big enough to cover them both, so they shift closer.
They fall silent, sitting next to each other and holding hands tightly. Shinya rests his head on Guren's shoulder and Guren leans closer to him. The battle is over for today and Guren can't seem to shake the feeling of relief and thankfulness because Shinya is still there, because they will heal and go back home once the sun rises again.
Guren stares at the lonely moon hoping that he'll be able to stay longer by Shinya's side. They don't talk, but there is no need to; they both know that they've got each other's back as they always have and always will. And as long as they can stay together, even if it is on these dangerous, yet precious wastelands, nothing else matters.
