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2020-03-07
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Feeling

Summary:

"My apologies, beautiful. I'm afraid I'm a bit of a nobody."
That's what the voice behind the door thinks. But one person in Hometown disagrees.

Notes:

OK, so this was basically an idea I had while writing Diaries that would not let me go. If Alphys didn't build Mettaton a body in Deltarune, then who else could do it? Then my mind traveled to Papyrus and how we didn't get to see him in Deltarune.
Thus the idea was born: What if Papyrus was an inventor and he was the one who gave Mettaton his body? And like with all things involving these two, my shipping brain went into overdrive.
I am 99.99% sure these two won't be canon in Deltarune. But hey, ships transcend universes, right?

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Work Text:

At last. Papyrus put the finishing touches on his latest invention.

As exhausted as he was, he still could not fight the urge to bounce up and down with excitement. This was his biggest breakthrough yet! This would determine the future of his career, his prospects of finally making friends in this strange new town called Hometown and finally coming out of his shell...

... and also the future of his relationship with a certain someone he had quickly developed complex feelings for.

This certain someone was a ghost who called himself Mettaton. They had met while Papyrus was on his weekly rounds to make friends (by way of sending them extravagantly-worded letters on their doorstep) and had almost instantly formed an inseparable bond. Both were lonely souls with dreams nobody ever understood. Both were afraid to open up to others lest they get hurt. Both shared everything with each other; their hopes, their dreams, their aspirations, and their insecurities.

As such, it was only a short amount of time before one would develop strange and indescribable feelings for the other. Papyrus knew he had to let Mettaton know of these feelings. 

He wanted this. He wanted it so badly. He had never before felt so connected with someone before Mettaton. 

Of course, entering a relationship with someone always had its obstacles. First of all, Mettaton rarely left the house. It took a lot of convincing from Papyrus to get Mettaton to start exiting his house and enjoying the outside world every so often, and even then it was always in the dark of night when nobody was around to watch. Second of all, there was the obvious: the object of his affections was incorporeal. If Papyrus wanted to show Mettaton affection, he would have to imitate hugs and kisses with empty space, and while he would have been grateful to show love in any way he could, a burning part of him knew he wanted to physically touch him, actually feel his lips on his teeth.

It was then that he realized: he was an inventor! He could craft a form for Mettaton!


"Papyrus," the ghost pondered one night, looking up at his friend with transparent eyes, "Do you ever think about what it would be like to have skin?"

"HONESTLY, NO," replied Papyrus. "IT'S NEVER REALLY INTERESTED ME. NEVER SAW THE APPEAL OF IT."

"Oh..." Mettaton sounded dejected, and Papyrus instantly started wondering if he'd touched a nerve. "Maybe it's just a 'me' thing, then. As a ghost, I often wonder what it's like to have a body. I want people to be able to hug me. I want to eat food other than ghost food that won't just pass through my ghostly form. I want to be able to walk and run like other people do." He hesitated, clearly full of anxiety, then continued. "That is why I never leave my house. I'm ashamed of who I am. I see everyone else with beautiful forms, people who are able to walk, run, eat... and I think, 'I want to be just like them.' But I know it's not to be. I'm just a transparent, incorporeal ghost who will never be able to experience the joys of being alive."

For once, Papyrus was speechless. He never realized how much of a struggle being incorporeal was for Mettaton. He tried to imagine what it would be like to not feel anything at all. Not being able to eat food, touch things, hug... These were all things Papyrus valued very much in his life, and the thought of having to live without those things scared him. But what made him more upset was that his poor friend had to endure this every waking moment of his life.

He encircled Mettaton in an embrace that wasn't quite a physical hug. "I KNOW YOU CAN'T FEEL HUGS DUE TO BEING A GHOST," he said. "BUT I HOPE YOU KNOW BY THIS GESTURE THAT I CARE ABOUT YOU AND I HATE THAT YOU'RE UNHAPPY. I'M HERE FOR YOU IF YOU NEED ANYTHING."

Mettaton smiled, trying his best to reciprocate the act. He emitted a happy warmth inside of Papyrus' embrace. "Thank you, darling," he replied. "You're wonderful."


Returning to the present, Papyrus looked down at this creation: Mettaton's new robotic body. This cold and lifeless yet sublimely beautiful form would soon become warm and energetic once Mettaton took up residence in it. 

Papyrus could not help reaching out and stroking the forelock of fine black faux-hair that covered the body's right eye. His hand glided down to his face, then wandered to other parts of his body. That beautiful, expressive silicone face; the long, shapely legs; the strong, metallic arms... this was exactly how he envisioned a corporeal Mettaton. It was a perfect representation of the romantic, creative personality that had so enraptured him. And by God, was he enraptured. He wanted to let Mettaton know how much he valued and cherished his company... He found himself slipping into blissful daydreams of passionate embraces and kisses before he knew it.

In the midst of his daydreaming, he suddenly encountered a roadblock: Mettaton didn't know of his feelings yet. And even if he did, would he feel the same way?

Perhaps this could be his way of confessing his feelings. His way of showing that he loved Mettaton and never wanted him to be unhappy. 

Eureka! He knew just what to do now.


The trek to Mettaton's house that night was tougher than he anticipated it being. Hoisting Mettaton's body over his shoulder, Papyrus immediately found himself regretting building such a heavy body. 

If this confession does work out the way I want it to, he thought, now I know who would be carrying who next time-- 

He immediately halted that thought right then and there. Wow. He hadn't even confessed yet and he was already making plans for the future.

It did not hit him that he could use his blue magic until after a full minute of struggling under the weight of the robotic body. He set the body down on the ground and channeled all of his magic energy toward lifting it into the air and resting it lightly on his shoulder, levitating it about a few inches above his clavicle. Yes, this would work much better.

He exited his basement and ventured into the dark of the night. It was bitterly cold, yet stars littered the dark skies, twinkling as if in defiance to the frigidity of the night. Such a sight would make any romantic outing worth suffering the chill of the night. 

He continued briskly walking north toward Mettaton's house, then found his pace slowing as anxiety took him over. His mind suddenly felt like it was going into hyperdrive. What if Mettaton doesn't accept my gift? What if he doesn't return my feelings? What if he actually hates me? What if--

Get a hold of yourself, Papyrus! He will certainly return your feelings! He will accept the gift. It's just a matter of... staying positive.

And so he continued despite his fear, trying his absolute best to stay positive. 

"HEY!" barked a voice.

Oh no. Oh no no no no no no.

Papyrus froze in fear as Officer Undyne strode over to him.

"What is that you have over your shoulder?" she questioned. "Did you murder someone?"

"OH NO, OFFICER!" he protested. "THE GREAT PAPYRUS WOULD NEVER DO SOMETHING SO HORRIBLE! THIS IS A PRESENT! FOR SOMEONE VERY SPECIAL!"

He glanced behind him at the robotic body. Oh, God. It did look like he'd murdered someone...

Wait. Don't monsters turn to dust when they die? Papyrus was quickly confusing himself.

Undyne looked him over with an air of tense suspicion, then walked behind him to examine the lifeless body slung over his shoulder. Papyrus heard various "uh-huh... uh-huh's" coming from the officer as she inspected the robot.

Apparently the inspection passed, because she returned to face Papyrus with a friendly expression on her piscine features.

"Alright, sorry to bother ya," she said. "It's just that this job can be so boring sometimes. Why do we even have law enforcement when it's like nobody even breaks the law? Well, there's that one purple kid, but I dunno if..." She muttered that last part to herself, almost lost in thought, but then caught herself. "Well, I hope the present goes over well! See ya 'round, punk!"

"I WILL MAKE SURE IT DOES! AND I WILL SEE YOU AROUND AS WELL!" Papyrus exclaimed, adding a salute. He had a slight suspicion that a normal policeman would not let him off this easy.

"Oh," she added as she walked away, "and don't break the law."

Papyrus nodded profusely. Something about her felt... very familiar somehow. Like he was seeing an old friend for the first time in years. A mentor, perhaps.

Alright, that's taken care of. Back to the task at hand. 

Soon enough, he'd reached Mettaton's house. He brought his free hand up to knock on the door, but hesitated. He forgot for a second Mettaton also had a cousin. If he knocked too loudly, no doubt he'd also wake them up and attract their attention!

Papyrus sucked in a breath to calm himself down. Might as well.

He knocked rhythmically on the door, the knock he used for Mettaton as a means of letting him know that it was his skeletal friend at the door. As soon as his hand dropped to his side, he found himself contemplating if he should just leave the gift on Mettaton's doorstep and run so far away that no one would ever find him--

He almost did. Then he saw the blinds on the second floor of the house open and caught sight of a transparent pink shape in the window. Mettaton! The figure brightened when he realized it was Papyrus knocking, but Papyrus did not miss the strange look on his face when he saw the robot slung over Papyrus' shoulder. Of course. Without the necessary context, it must have been a really strange sight.

Maybe he shouldn't run away. Giving the gift to Mettaton personally would make the moment even more important for both of them and aid in Papyrus' love confession. And besides, he'd have to do it sooner or later.

The door opened and there stood Mettaton in his billowy, transparent form. 

"Oh, Papyrus..." he whispered. "It's the middle of the night, and what is that you have over your shoulder?" He raised an arm to indicate the robotic form Papyrus was still holding onto.

Papyrus gulped. "MAY I COME IN FIRST?" he managed to squeak out.

"O-oh, ah... Of course. I'm sorry, darling," the ghost anxiously stammered as Papyrus entered with the robotic body and set it on the ground in front of Mettaton. He hates it, Papyrus thought anxiously. I haven't even explained what it is yet and he already hates it.

"What is that?" the ghost wondered about the robotic form. "It looks so... human..." His face contorted into one of horror as he realized something. "P-Papyrus, did you--"

Oh no! He was getting the wrong idea! Papyrus knew this would happen somehow.

"WHAT? NO! NO, I DIDN'T KILL SOMEONE!" Papyrus protested, taken aback. "I KNOW HOW IT MUST LOOK, BUT..." 

He took in a deep breath. Now or never.

Then he let it out. "THIS IS MY GIFT. FOR YOU. Y-YOUR NEW C-CORPOREAL FORM. I'VE BEEN WORKING ON IT DAY AND NIGHT SO THAT YOU COULD HAVE ONE." 

Papyrus looked into Mettaton's eyes, searching for a reaction. But the ghost was struck speechless.

He continued, letting the words flow out of him as though he was speaking from his very soul. "WHEN I FIRST HEARD OF YOUR GHOSTLY STRUGGLES, IT PAINED ME TO NO END. I DON'T EVER WANT ANY OF MY FRIENDS TO BE UNHAPPY. AND... TO ME... YOU ARE MORE THAN A FRIEND. YOU ARE LIKE A WHOLE OTHER PART OF ME. SO THINKING ABOUT YOUR INCORPOREAL STRUGGLES WAS LIKE A PARALYZING PAIN TO ME."

Not a single ectoplasmic muscle inched on Mettaton's face, but Papyrus saw some tears forming in his eyes. This made him stop talking and look down. He hates it, doesn't he? he thought. What if I've hurt him by doing this? 

Despite this, he continued. "I CARE ABOUT YOU SO DEEPLY, METTATON. EVERY MOMENT I SPEND WITH YOU IS PURE HAPPINESS. AND I DON'T WANT TO STAY LIKE THIS KNOWING THAT MY COMPANION IS SUFFERING AND I AM NOT."

God, why couldn't he just get to the point already? He straightened up, determined to let the confession spill out of him, but when he looked up, Mettaton had vanished.

This was a mistake, Papyrus thought somberly. I've wasted hours I could have spent sleeping to work on this, and now I've hurt him. He hates me. He never wants anything to do with me ever again.

He turned away from the robot at his feet and plopped to the ground crying. 

He couldn't face his creation. It was a reminder of the poor soul he'd hurt.

In his moment of anguish, he failed to notice the metallic eyelids open. He failed to notice the eyes light up and the robot settle to a sitting position. He also failed to notice the look of concern on the robot's face.

He did not, however, fail to notice the metallic arms wrapping around him and the silicone face resting against his bony shoulder. At that instant, Papyrus was jerked out of his abyss of misery and he looked down at the robot burying his face into the hard, bony surface of his clavicle. 

Wait. Did he accept the body after all...?

The robot looked up at him imploringly. "Please don't cry, Papyrus," he pleaded. "Please, please don't cry."

There was no mistaking that voice. This was Mettaton, all right.

"B-BUT," Papyrus spluttered, "Y-YOU WERE CRYING, AND THEN YOU DISAPPEARED--"

Mettaton was shocked. "What? N-no! It wasn't like that! Those were tears of happiness! And that vanishing... that was me going into the body." He paused, letting the ghostly tears in his LED eyes trickle down his face. "This was what I wanted all my life. To be able to feel things. To look beautiful like this. It feels--" he paused again, searching for the right word, "-- incredible."

Papyrus opened his mouth to speak, but was stopped when Mettaton suddenly threw his whole weight against his body. Papyrus could feel robotic metal arms tightly constricting his ribs and tears wetting his shirt.

"Thank you, Papyrus," he sobbed. "Thank you so, so, so much."

Papyrus hugged back in a silent gesture of "you're welcome." And just like that, the anxious thoughts bouncing around in his head earlier had disappeared. Comforting, loving thoughts took their place instead. He loved my gift! I made him happy!

I made him happy. And I want to continue to make him happy.

I love him.

That was an out-of-the-blue thought. Mettaton couldn't know that! Not yet, anyway. Papyrus tried his best not to make it seem like he was blushing and quivering within Mettaton's strong embrace. 

It was true, though. Papyrus did very much love Mettaton. But did Mettaton love him back?

Mettaton peeled his face away from his shirt to look at Papyrus. The look in his eyes was sentimental but unreadable. Gazing back into his eyes (and marveling at how he managed to make them so beautiful), Papyrus only faintly registered that Mettaton had brought one hand on his face and one behind the back of his head.

Both were silent for a few moments. Then, before Papyrus could realize what was happening, silicone lips met his teeth in a fervent kiss.

Oh God. It was happening. Mettaton was kissing him. All his dreams were coming true at last.

His lips felt so soft against his crooked and hard teeth. Metal hands traced his cheekbones, then glided down his back as the kiss grew deeper and more passionate. Besides touching him, Papyrus could not find a physical way to repay the gesture, so he channeled warming magic into his kiss as he pressed against Mettaton's lips. Soon enough, they were melting together, two souls becoming one. And the feeling was incredible.

When they finally pulled apart, both were gasping and gazing into each other's eyes. 

"God, I've wanted to kiss you for so long," Mettaton admitted, out of breath and smiling dreamily. "And now that I'm corporeal, I can finally do that."

Wait. What? Did Papyrus hear that right? Was Mettaton... confessing his feelings?

Papyrus attempted to speak, but Mettaton interrupted him.

"I love you, Papyrus," he admitted sheepishly. "I've loved you for such a long time. I just couldn't find a way to tell you how I felt. I thought you wanted someone... who could... hug..." Mettaton failed to finish his thought before he started weeping softly.

"METTATON!" Papyrus exclaimed. "YOU KNOW THAT'S NOT TRUE! I WOULD HAVE ACCEPTED YOU IN ANY FORM. IT'S JUST--" he touched Mettaton's tear-stained face and lifted it to look into his eyesockets, "I DIDN'T WANT YOU TO LIVE WITH THE PAIN OF NOT BEING ABLE TO FEEL. PLUS, METTATON..."

He was suddenly overtaken by nerves, but he willed them away with a deep breath in and out. Then he spoke.

"I LOVE YOU TOO."

Mettaton brightened at that, and he threw himself at Papyrus for another tight hug, sending them both toppling backward into the floor. The surprise of that fall sent both of them into a laughing fit. Looking into each other's eyes, they ceased their laughing to come in for another shorter kiss.

Papyrus was the first to break off the kiss. He looked at his new lover in awe. Of course, the robot he designed was attractive, but he knew Mettaton was the only one who could make it truly beautiful. 

He touched Mettaton's face in admiration, and the robot grinned warmly in response.

"You're so sweet, darling," he cooed, and Papyrus felt his cheeks heating up. In response to his blushing, Mettaton giggled softly, and the sound of that soft, gorgeous laugh made his soul quiver.

Then Papyrus realized something. "METTATON," he began, "DO YOU KNOW WHAT YOU'RE GOING TO DO NOW? I MEAN, EVERYONE IN HOMETOWN KNOWS YOU AS THIS GHOSTLY SHUT-IN. HOW ARE YOU GOING TO REINTRODUCE YOURSELF TO THE PUBLIC?"

Mettaton was lost in thought for a moment. "I guess..." he replied, "I guess I'll just go out there and announce myself, and then take it as it comes from there. I don't imagine they will be too terribly unwelcoming of my new form."

"AND WHAT ABOUT YOUR COUSIN?"

This made Mettaton pause. His cousin had a reputation for being anxious. And being just as anxious than them if not more, he knew this all too well.

"Well..." he wondered, "I guess I'll introduce it to them first thing in the morning. Since this gift was rather sudden, there's no chance of easing them into it now. Either way, they'll accept me. I just know it."

Papyrus grew timid. Mettaton was right; this gift was sudden. Probably too sudden.

Mettaton realized what he said and Papyrus' reaction to it, and instantly looked remorseful. "No, Papyrus, don't take that the wrong way!" pleaded Mettaton. "It's okay, really, darling. I'm glad it happened. I have a corporeal form and I can feel things now. We've confessed our feelings to each other. I wouldn't want it any other way, seeing where we are now." He caressed Papyrus cheekbone with his fingers. "You're such a wonderful person, Papyrus. I'm glad we met."

"I AM GLAD WE MET EACH OTHER AS WELL!" he responded, reciprocating Mettaton's loving gesture. He didn't want it any other way either.

Mettaton suddenly looked insecure as he gazed into Papyrus' eyesockets. "Papyrus," he breathed, "stay with me and hug me for the rest of the night."

"ANY SPECIAL REASON?" Papyrus asked, letting the warmth of this new feeling seep into his voice.

"I've only just started feeling, and now I want to feel this forever."

Papyrus couldn't argue with that logic. So he gladly did as he was told. Mettaton's arms wrapped around him, and the two came in for a third kiss, this one deeper, longer, and more passionate than the first.

Papyrus, having had a physical form since birth, had the ability to feel all his life. But this... this was on a whole other level. As he leaned into the kiss, deep inside he found that he understood how Mettaton felt. 

He, too, wanted to experience this feeling for the rest of his life.

Notes:

NGL, I'm pretty sure I almost cried writing this.
I promise I'll get back to writing Diaries! I just need to get school stuff out of the way and focus on one-shots. In the meantime, I hope you enjoy this sweet little AU fic!