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Peter shot up in bed, clutching his chest. His shirt was drenched with sweat, and it took him a few minutes to get control of his breathing again. This was the eighth night in a row - screams of battle filling his ears, alien monsters surrounding him, his mentor’s eyes closing for the last time….
He stood up and rummaged through his bag for his non-Stark phone, and scrolled through his recent searches on Google. This was it - he had to do something. May had bought him some melatonin, but something about his spidey metabolism just made him groggy. Shuri has offered to send him something, but he didn’t want to bother her for favors. NyQuil knocked him out for two days - effective, but he couldn’t keep going like that. He finished looking at his searches, and closed his eyes. He knew sleep wouldn’t come, but he could at least daydream of sometime in the future, when things would suck a little less.
*
The passing period between third and fourth period was a little longer because of something something reasons. Peter didn’t bother wondering why - he was just happy for it today. He’d managed to shake Ned, feigning a need to talk to their English teacher, and slipped down the home econ hallway to finding of the school’s dealers.
“Parker,” Gibson said, smiling and giving him a fist bump when Peter reached his crew. “What’s a goody goody like you doing down our way?”
“I uhh… I… well…”
“Breathe, Parker. If you pass out I’m not taking your ass to the nurse.”
“Right, my bad. I was wondering if you could help me out. You know? I can’t sleep.”
“He’s the cops,” one of the crew joked, making them all laughed.
Peter gave as much of a laugh as he could to keep things light. “It’s nightmares. From everything.”
“Really?” Gibson asked.
“Yeah…. Come on, man. Are you gonna make me say it?”
To Peter’s surprise, Gibson had lost his smirk.
“Nah, man. I’m not gonna make you say it,” he said. “My sis got dusted - in the middle of me pushing her on a swing. I get it.” He gave Peter a friendly tap on the chest, and Peter felt something slip into his jacket pocket. “First two doses on the house. Come see me if it works for you.”
*
The tiny bottle sat in his sock drawer for two days before Peter’s nightmares overcame his nervousness.
He slept like a baby that night.
He saved up dose two, but gave Gibson a thumbs up the next time he passed him in the hallway.
It was another week before Peter took the second dose. Another good night’s rest, and Peter felt okay enough to head out to the Avengers’ compound that Saturday to get some work done. As he got ready, he put on the nanotech spidersuit bracelet Tony has made before he died. Before he could leave his room, he nearly jumped out of his skin hearing KAREN day,
Tox Screen for Peter Parker: Percocet Detected
“KAREN! Shhhhh! What the -“
No Prescriptions Filed - Non-prescribed Use, Yes or No?
For a wild moment, he figured he’d lie. But...curiosity started to seep in, and he said, “Yes.”
The lights in his room dimmed, and a hologram of Tony shot out to the far wall.
Peter sank to the floor. “Come on, no,” he croaked. “KAREN, turn it off.”
“Hey Pete,” Tony said gently. “Don’t worry, I’ll make this quick. It’s okay…”
Peter was pretty sure he was going to start hyperventilating as he watched the hologram pace back and forth in front of them.
“You know, I’m not even entirely sure how to start this conversation. Clearly I’m not the person to preach about unhealthy coping mechanisms. I guess I just want to say...be careful. If you’re hearing this, it means I’m not around to have this talk in person. I can’t tell you about the time I woke up in the gutter with barbecue sauce on my...anyway. Addiction is no joke, and I don’t want… I want you to avoid my mistakes. For your own sake. I don’t know what you’re going through right now, but I do know there are people who will help you. Reach out. Rhodey’s good at keeping secrets, if you don’t want to talk to Happy. And if you’re having trouble sleeping -“
“Holy shit, he was good,” Peter whispered.
“- go to the lab and grab one of the blue boxes in number five locker. Try the Sandman Protocol. Might not work, but the schematics are in the locker too - maybe you can work on it. And Pete?”
“Yeah?” Peter asked, not even caring that it was just a hologram.
“You’re going to be okay.”
Peter sat against the wall for a long time after the hologram ended and KAREN turned the lights back on. He stood, shakily, and picked up his phone. He didn’t call Happy, but he shot a text to Shuri. He tucked the little bottle back into his Atom Ant socks and put it back in his drawer. Gibson would only refill bottles he’d given out, so he’d have to bring it back if he wanted more. But he’d reach out first, and see what Shuri said before he went back to Gibson. He’d figure out what the Sandman Protocol was. And maybe he’d talk to Happy. He’d reach out...for his own sake…
But mostly for Tony.