Work Text:
June 27, 2021
“We should get going,” Gray murmured, not wanting to wake the two boys who had fallen asleep between them while watching the movie.
Hana, who was snuggled up against his other side, immediately complained, and Natsu couldn’t help but laugh. They looked so right like that. Hana had been shy towards Gray in the beginning, but now she seemed to accept his presence, even welcome it. Natsu felt a pleasant warmth fill him as he looked at all of them huddled together, looking so much like a family.
One that was made up of the somewhat broken remains of two others, but he couldn’t help but feel like they fit well, and seeing his kids so comfortable around his boyfriend made him feel more confident about his choice.
The noise of rain pit pattering against the house was soothing, and he could see that the boys weren’t the only ones affected by the sound. Gray seemed like he was getting drowsier by the second, and Natsu was reminded that Erza was away at some flower show and wouldn’t return until the following afternoon.
“You don’t have to go, “Natsu offered, “You were coming back tomorrow morning anyway. Just stay, Aki can sleep in Atlas’ room.”
Gray peered at him in surprise, but after a moment or two, he replied, “Okay,” his eyes returning to the television. He shifted slightly to allow Hana to curl into him more.
Natsu honestly hadn’t really thought about anything other than the fact that he didn’t want the night to end yet, but the moment Gray agreed, he realized what he’d done.
He’d asked his boyfriend to spend the night without giving any thought to where he was going to sleep or what it would mean for them to share a bed.
Shit!
It was too late to take it back, and it’s not like he wanted to. He just wasn’t ready to do more than what they were already doing, and now he was afraid he’d given Gray the impression that he was eager to take the next step.
The movie ended, and after turning off all the downstairs lights and checking all the doors and windows, they headed upstairs. Each of them held a sleeping little boy in his arms while Hana ran ahead, turning the lights on for them. She got ready for bed on her own, entering Atlas’ room to kiss them good night, and Natsu left Gray with the boys so he could tuck her in.
All the while, his heart was fluttering, joyful, and anxious. He already knew he was in love with Gray, even if he’d never dared to say the words out loud. Experience had taught him that bond had to have been in place before he saw Gray as anything but a close friend. While he hadn’t really given much thought as to where he wanted their relationship to go moving forward, this taste of domestic bliss made him wonder.
Could they have something like this sometime in their future?
He really hoped so.
He read Hana a short bedtime story and kissed her goodnight one last time before returning to Atlas’ room to make sure both boys had everything they needed. Neither had woken up, and they had already snuggled into each other in their sleep.
Gray waited for him there, and Natsu could tell that he was a bit nervous as well. He grabbed his hand and led him to his bedroom, heart racing with every step they took as the door loomed nearer.
“This is it right here,” Natsu chuckled nervously before entering, thankful that for once, his room wasn’t too messy. He let go of Gray’s hand, immediately moving to his dresser to find a pair of pajama pants Gray could wear, trying to keep himself busy so that he didn’t say or do anything stupid.
“Uhm, the bathroom is over there, I think there might be an unopened toothbrush in one of the drawers,” Natsu babbled, tossing the sleepwear to his boyfriend and pointing him toward the en suite before moving to remove the cushions from his bed.
“Has anyone ever told you you’re kind of adorable when you’re freaking out?” Gray snickered, quickly closing the door of the bathroom, only narrowly escaping the cushion Natsu had thrown his way.
His entire face burned from Gray’s teasing compliment and the realization that he hadn’t been as smooth as he’d thought. He placed both of his hands on the dresser pushing against it in an attempt to calm down his racing heart at hearing Gray say he was adorable.
Once he’d calmed down some, he grabbed another pair of pajama pants for himself, ignoring the sound of the bathroom door opening and of his bedsheets rustling as Gray lay down on them. Taking off his pants, he quickly replaced them with pajama pants, not sure whether Gray was watching him or not. He thought about leaving his t-shirt on, but he knew he tended to overheat at night, and he reasoned that Gray had seen him shirtless plenty of times.
He turned around slowly, attempting to prepare himself mentally for what he knew he was about to see and failing miserably. Gray was casually sprawled on his bed wearing his pants and looking every bit the male model he was.
It was rather unfair that any person could be that effortlessly attractive. And to his dismay, Natsu felt his body respond with interest as his eyes trailed over his boyfriend, from his intense dark blue eyes, settling on the lips that felt so good against his when they kissed. He swallowed thickly as his eyes continued their journey south over broad shoulders and taut pectorals, down to the well-defined abs that he longed to trace. He stopped himself before he could continue, quickly moving his hands to his groin in utter mortification, trying to keep Gray from noticing how much seeing him like that had affected him.
Gray kindly chose not to comment on Natsu’s predicament feigning interest in the room’s decoration instead. However, his eyes lingered on a framed picture of him and Lisanna far too long for Natsu’s liking, and that helped with his problem a bit.
“Are you planning on coming to bed soon?” Gray asked in a neutral tone, “I’m kind of tired.”
“Uhm yeah, just need to brush my teeth,” Natsu called out, hurrying to enter his bathroom. He grabbed the toothpaste and began to brush his teeth, all while trying to give himself a pep talk.
He was turning it into a bigger deal than it was. They were just going to sleep. Next to each other. In the same bed. Nothing to worry about at all. He took a few deep breaths and exited the bathroom.
His body may have been overwhelmed by the sight of Gray in all his beauty, but it was nothing compared to what it did to his heart to see him lying comfortably under the covers, but he had no words that could express that. Instead, he griped, “Scoot over, you’re on my side of the bed.”
“And here I thought romance was dead,” Gray muttered, but he moved, lying on his side so he could look at Natsu, who had finally braved his bed after turning off all the lights.
“Not dead, just kind of petrified,” Natsu admitted at long last, lying on his back and covering his eyes with his hand.
Gray chuckled, “Are you afraid that you’re so irresistible I’ll have no choice but to jump you?”
The words had been said in jest, but Natsu knew there was some truth to them, he was sort of afraid.
“I don’t know,” he hedged, “I guess I’m more afraid of what you think this might mean.”
“I think that I was tired, it was raining and you offered me a place to sleep,” Gray assured him, pulling Natsu’s hand away from his eyes so that they could look at each other in the dim moonlight. “It doesn’t have to mean anything more than that unless we both want it to.”
Natsu thought about that, trying to decide what he wanted, but Gray’s voice cut right through his thoughts.
“Hey dumbass, wasn’t it you who said you’d tell me if I did anything you weren’t ready for? Or have you already forgotten?” He moved closer and pulled Natsu into his arms, kicking the blanket away with one foot so he could put his leg on top of it. “Geez, what are you, a furnace?”
Natsu snickered at the comment and found himself relaxing again, getting comfortable in the embrace.
“Is that your subtle way of telling me I’m hot?”
Gray snorted at that, “I think we’ve established I don’t really do subtle.”
“Ain’t that the truth! Or tactful, or patient,” Natsu began to giggle loudly when Gray cried out, “Why you little jerk!” and promptly began to tickle his sides.
Natsu let out a high pitched squeal as Gray’s fingers poked and danced across his sensitive spots.
“Shh, you’ll wake up the kids,” Gray taunted, challenging him to remain quiet despite his onslaught.
“Jerk,” Natsu managed to pant out as his stomach began to ache from all the laughing.
“But you love me!” Gray exclaimed as he stopped tickling, and though he was trying to play it off as part of their game, Natsu could hear the underlying question hiding in the quip.
He turned to his side to look at his boyfriend worriedly, “Are you really ready to hear me say that to you?”
Gray frowned, remaining silent for a moment, “I don’t know, I-” he fumbled around for words as he lay on his back and stared up at the ceiling. Natsu moved until his head was on Gray’s chest, draping his arm casually over his boyfriend’s stomach.
“I thought I’d never have this again,” Natsu murmured, “but here you are, and you’re so much more than I could have ever asked for.” He kissed Gray’s chest gently, not really in the mood to start anything when Gray seemed so lost, “I’m so grateful I met you, and that you’ve been so understanding.”
“You’re worth the wait,” Gray whispered, making Natsu feel shy. Gray chuckled, searching out his lips for a sweet kiss, and even as it deepened, their tongues played lazily, neither wanting to start something that might complicate the moment. With one final kiss, Gray wrapped his arms around Natsu, each shifting until they found a position where they were both comfortable.
“You know, for a minute there, I was afraid I was the one who was going to get jumped.” Gray teased as he caressed Natsu’s arm in slow circles. “Don’t think I didn’t see what your eyes were doing,”
Natsu could only be thankful he’d already turned off the lights because the burst of red that was surely spreading across his face couldn’t be seen in the dark.
“Goodnight, love,” Gray snickered, the triumph in his voice unmistakable.
“Good night,” Natsu could still hear Gray chuckling at him, but he shrugged it off, refusing to give him the additional pleasure of getting a rise out of him. So what if he saw him? It’s not like it was a bad thing. He closed his eyes, vowing to get him back tomorrow before drifting off into the most peaceful slumber he’d had for a very long time.
0-0
Gray awoke to the sound of snores. Blinking his eyes open, he peered at his boyfriend. Natsu was splayed out over most of the bed, arms stretched out, mouth gaped wide open, pink hair sticking out every which way, and yet Gray still thought he looked stunning.
He turned on his side so he could get a good look at him, reveling in the intimacy of the moment and the elation that came from having Natsu invite him into his bed. He smiled as he remembered some of the things they’d said to each other before falling asleep. It had been peaceful and pleasant, a breath of fresh air compared to the way he’d been treated by his husband. It was everything he had been starving for.
Siegrain had always been in the mood for sex, but he rarely allowed himself to be vulnerable enough to do something like cuddling. And while their sex had been pleasurable, it had lacked affection. Their encounters, while frequent, were meaningless and disconnected. More often than not, Siegrain would turn on his side and go to sleep immediately after they were done, or he’d go off to a club claiming he was scouting, leaving Gray alone to wonder what he’d done wrong.
That was why, while Gray was definitely looking forward to having sex with Natsu at some point, he wasn’t in any hurry. He was beyond happy to enjoy what they had right now. Knowing that he was in this bed because Natsu cared about him as a person was incredibly satisfying, in a way he’d only experienced briefly in previous relationships.
Every touch, every word out of Natsu’s mouth, while sometimes idiotic, was honest and full of affection for him. Filling him with a sort of pleasure that while different from what he was used to felt infinitely more satisfying after years of being treated as nothing more than a pretty face or a piece of meat.
When he was with Natsu, he felt loved.
He moved a little closer and stroked Natsu’s hair carefully so as not to wake him just yet. The rays of the sun slipped through the gap underneath the door. The house was still quiet, aside from Natsu’s snoring, and Gray wanted to savor the serenity of the moment for as long as he could.
However, not even two minutes had passed when he heard the footsteps of two pairs of small, bare feet. Tiny, hushed voices and giggles were quickly coming closer. Gray couldn’t help but smile when the door handle went down oh so slowly, and as the door opened, Atlas and Aki came sneaking in.
He closed his eyes, pretending to be asleep until the boys had climbed on the bed, and it took almost all of his self-restraint to keep a straight face and hold back his laughter. How those little monkeys thought they were stealthy was beyond him, but even more surprising was the fact that Natsu was somehow able to sleep right through it. He waited, keeping perfectly still until he was sure they were both close enough, and then he sprung, wrapping them both in his arms.
The two boys squealed and giggled and thrashed around a little from being startled so suddenly, and only then did Natsu began to stir, opening his eyes and grinning at the scene that was unfolding. Gray had started a tickle war, and Natsu didn’t need more than a few seconds to catch up and join in. Once the boys were exhausted from laughing so hard, they moved them in between them, letting them catch their breaths as they all formed a big cuddle formation.
“Morning boys, did you sleep well?” Natsu asked, ruffling Atlas’ hair.
They both nodded happily chattering words at the same time, “Hungwy dada, down, eat!” Though a bit overenthusiastic, the message was loud and clear. But mostly loud.
Hana appeared in the doorway and hesitated for only a few seconds before joining them, and Gray was more than surprised when she didn’t give just Natsu a soft peck on the cheek but him as well. They barely fit in the bed with all five of them, so it wasn’t particularly comfortable, but none of them cared, content just to be together. And although Gray knew it was way too soon to be having thoughts like these, he couldn’t help but think that this was what being part of a family felt like.
“Hey dad, can we have pancakes?” Hana cajoled, really selling it with fluttering eyelashes and all.
“Sure-” Natsu stretched, or tried to as the lack of movement space was making it hard for him to do so, “but you all have to get off us first if you want us to get up.”
He didn’t have to say it twice. The kids scrambled off the bed, cheering and making their way downstairs ahead of them. Natsu got up as well, after a yawn and a proper stretch, but when Gray didn’t follow, he turned around to look at him, “You coming?”
“Yeah, I’ll...be right there,” Gray nodded.
“Kay,” Natsu smiled and leaned over to give him a kiss, “but I don’t want to hear any complaints when you take too long, and we already ate everything!” He then quickly went after the kids before they decided to get started without him or raided the pantry for snacks to bridge the wait for breakfast.
When Natsu was out of sight, Gray finally gave in to the emotions he’d been suppressing, not because he wanted to hide them from him, but because he didn’t want the kids to worry or get upset. Tears flowed freely from his eyes as he thought about moments like these in his past.
Waking up to Aki trying to climb into his and Siegrain’s bed, only to receive complaints and a foul mood if Siegrain had been in bed at all. Seeing the disappointment on his son’s face when he got scolded because he “smelled”, “drooled” or was “too loud.”
But he also remembered better days from his own childhood, when he was the one sneaking into his parents’ room. Times when his mother was pregnant with Rogue and let him feel her belly, how excited he’d been to feel the kicks and how he had promised to be the best big brother ever.
He had failed at that, and he felt like he had failed in his marriage as well. Not for his own sake and definitely not for Siegrain’s, but for Aki’s. He’d deserved to wake up to a loving family too. Like Atlas and Hana did and Gray and Rogue used to in the past.
He thought about all the times he’d failed Rogue after he left for college. He’d neglected to live up to the promise he had once made to always watch over him. But out of all his failures, Rogue was the one he could still do something about.
With that thought in mind, he sent his brother a text asking if he wanted to hang out sometime that week, just the two of them. And after that, he dried his tears and got up, ready to join Natsu and the kids for breakfast.
0-0
Gray could hear music playing on the radio as he came downstairs still wearing Natsu’s borrowed pajama pants, it was some catchy tune that had been popular that summer, although he didn’t know the name of it. The sound of Hana singing it made him smile, but not as much as Natsu singing offkey, more than likely in the hopes of annoying her if his laughs at her protests were any indication.
To his surprise, both Atlas and Aki were also in the kitchen, not planted in front of the TV set or in the playroom. Natsu was asking them to bring different ingredients from the refrigerator or pantry, and it had turned into a game, each boy trying to be the first one to figure out where the ingredient was located and bring it back to Natsu.
Aki was smiling, looking every bit as if he belonged there with the others, and Gray couldn’t help but to stand back and watch for a bit longer, feeling shy and a little out of place. None of them had noticed him yet, and as the next song came on, Atlas tried to dance, wiggling his butt and bouncing from one foot to the other. It wasn’t long before Aki tried to imitate him while Natsu and Hana looked at each other and burst into giggles. Each one doing their own version of the dance.
Gray snorted, and they all looked up at the noise, but rather than being embarrassed, Natsu coaxed him to join them, offering him his hand in invitation while the kids yelled out his name, welcoming him into their game.
“Get in here Princess, let’s show them how it’s done,” Natsu grinned, well aware of how much he hated the nickname and not caring in the slightest.
Gray shook his head at him in disapproval, but grabbed on to his hand all the same, letting Natsu lead him around the kitchen in complicated twirls and dips that were harder to keep up with than he’d first thought, especially while laughing. The kids ran after them, giggling at their antics and yelling encouragement.
He noticed Natsu staring at his face, brow furrowing in concern as he examined his puffy eyes, the remains of his earlier crying.
“Is everything okay?”
“It will be,” Gray smiled, caught up in the moment, in the joy of being part of something. It was like he had stolen a peek at his future, and he was already in love with it.
Almost as if he had heard his thoughts, Natsu’s eyes flashed with mischief as he teased, “Just think all this could be yours someday.”
God, he hoped so.
He wanted nothing more than for this to become his new normal. To wake up with the man he adored and be part of a loving family. One that actually enjoyed each other’s company. And while it was too soon for them to take such a big step, more than ever, he was determined to free himself of Siegrain’s shadow for good, so that someday when they were ready, they could.
Gray turned the tables on Natsu, smirking as he noticed his boyfriend had trouble following his steps, not used to being led, and when Gray dipped him, making sure he held on to him tightly so he wouldn’t fall, he teased, “Who’s the princess now?”
Everyone laughed as Natsu fluttered his eyelashes, playing along. Gray could feel his eyes well as he realized just how lucky he was to have fallen in love with this ridiculous man who had accepted him into his heart. He only hoped that they could heal each other and move forward into their very own future. One that Gray was determined would be full of laughter and love.