Archive of Our Own ^beta

Niall wakes up as he feels the side of his face warming up, opening one eye to find with the sun shining bright through the open window. He lets out a soft groan when he realises that he forgot to close the curtains before he went to bed last night, or else maybe he could have gotten an extra hour of sleep. He’d only gotten home from work at about three in the morning, and by the time he washed up and slipped under the covers it was already nearing four. He turns to look at the clock on his nightstand and curses when he sees that it’s only half past 10.

He rolls onto his back and tries to fall back asleep but then he slowly registers a ringing sound somewhere near his head. He still doesn’t open his eyes, but instead uses his hand to blindly feel around his pathetic futon until his fingers grasp the vibrating device. He peeks an eye open to check who it is, and whether he can just ignore it and carry on with his sleep, but he sees his mum’s name flashing on the screen and he tries to rub the sleep from his eyes before pressing ‘Accept’.

“Hi ma.”

“Morning sweetheart. Or is it the afternoon over there?” Niall can hear the smile in her voice, and he shakes his head fondly at what she’s implying.

“Ma, I’m pretty sure you know what time it is here considering Dublin and London share the same timezones.” He says as he runs his fingers through his hair, finally opening his eyes to stare at the ceiling above him, the brightness of the room a little harsh on his sight and he groans before closing his eyes again.

He still feels the warmth of the sun on his face, but it’s a comfortable feeling since it’s almost autumn now, and besides he’s too lazy to get up to close the curtains.

“Niall?”

“I’m here, I’m here.”

His mum goes into a rant about how he shouldn’t be in bed at this time and that if he had a normal job he wouldn’t be tired for most of the morning. He ignores it, as he usually does, he’s had too many conversations with her about his job as a bartender and the fact that his mum didn’t like it at all.

“I just worry about you that’s all. Living all by yourself in London. I don’t understand why you had to move so far away. I’m sure you could have gotten a job at one of the pubs here in Mullingar.”

He could have, hell his dad’s best mate owned a pub that he’d been going to ever since he was a kid and he easily could have gotten a job there, but no – he’d never been out of the little country town in Ireland his whole life and he was itching to get out. All his friends knew what they wanted to do in life – a doctor, lawyer, one of them Bressie even went on to become an international pop star – but that wasn’t what he wanted.

Maybe that was the problem, he didn’t know what he wanted to do with his life. All he knew was that he wanted leave Ireland. And so his dad’s friend hooked him up with another friend who owned a pub in London, and Niall packed up his bags despite all the protests from his mum and left without looking back. That was two years ago and he hasn’t regretted it.

The thing his mum doesn’t understand is that he’s actually really happy with his life as it is. He loves working at the pub and meeting new people and having a chat with the regulars every night. He genuinely enjoys it and he was always a people person anyway, plus he’s met a good bunch that he can call his closest friends while working there.

He tunes back into his one-sided conversation with his mum and lets out a loud sigh purposely when he realises she’s still talking about how he needs to find a job that will give him a stable life and that he needs to settle down soon because he isn’t getting any younger.

“Ma, how many times are we going to go over this?”

She lets out a sigh, and Niall can’t help but chuckle because it sounds almost exactly like the way he does it, except they’re both doing it for two very different reasons.

“I’m happy okay?”

“I know love. But you’ve always been my baby you know? And I worry about you. I don’t like the thought of you being alone there.”

Niall keeps quiet for a while, because he isn’t sure how else to reassure his mum. And maybe there’s a little truth to what she says, sometimes coming home to an empty flat isn’t the nicest feeling, but he doesn’t let it bother him too much. 

Instead, he just reassures her, deciding to quickly cut the call short. “Don’t worry about me ma. Anyway, I’ve got get my day going. I’ll speak to you soon yeah?”

Thankfully she doesn’t push any further and lets him go before making him promise that he’s taking good care of himself.  He puts the phone down and while he does have to head down to the shops to pick up some food for his barren kitchen, he ends up lying in bed for another half an hour, floating in and out of slumber before his alarm rings at a quarter past 12. He hits the snooze button, and is tempted to stay in bed but his rumbling stomach forces him to get up.

He makes a mental list while he’s in the shower of the things he needs to get at the shop later, though he knows that he’ll probably end up aimlessly walking through the aisles and picking up anything that catches his eye.  

He still ends up rummaging through the cupboards in the kitchen to see what he needs to get. He lives in a modest studio flat that’s divided into the kitchen and living area and the bedroom by a sliding door. He’d been lucky to have enough savings by the time he moved to the big city, and with the money earned from working at the bar, he moved into this place a year ago after sharing a house in a dodgy area of London.

By the time he’s out the door, it’s half past one in the afternoon and his stomach is growling with hunger. He stops by a deli on the way to his local Tesco, and gets into a friendly chat with the owner, who comes into the pub sometimes. He ends up spending more than an hour there, and when he looks at the time he realises he’s got just under two hours to get his shopping done and go home to get ready for work.

Of course he gets a little carried away while doing his shopping and before he knows it, he’s rushing back home with 30 minutes to spare before he has to leave for work.

It’s just his luck that it starts raining hard midway through his walk to work, which is only a few streets down from his flat, and Niall makes a mad dash towards the bar to avoid getting soaked completely. He practically bursts through the doors and shakes the rain off his shoulders, hissing when he feels a rush of cold air go up his spine.

“You’re late.”

Niall was hoping that no one would notice, but of course Josh, another bartender, is already there and behind the counter with a pleased grin on his face as he looks at the dripping sight in front of him.

He’s right though, Niall really is late. He was meant to get there at 5pm but it’s now pushing 5.30. But he just shrugs it off, knowing that the big boss Paul would let him get away with it anyway.

“You’re also making a bit of a puddle there, so I suggest you clear out before Jade sees ya cause she just mopped the floors up 10 minutes ago and she’s not gonna be happy to know she’s got to do it again.”

Niall quickly shrugs his soaked jacket off and toes off his shoes, trying not to make a trail of water follow behind him on his way to the bathroom. They’ve got a uniform, all black – black pants, black shoes and a plain black shirt with the pub logo - and he’s thankful that he keeps an extra set at the pub that he can change into. It’s obviously not the first time that this has happened.

The live band’s already setting up by the time he’s changed and walked out and today on the roster are The Pingu Brothers, who happen to be one of Niall’s favourites. Ed Sheeran and Harry Styles aren’t really brothers, and when pressed for why they chose such a name for their band, they just shrugged and pointed to the matching Pingu tattoos on their arms. Niall considers them as his close friends, and even on the days that they’re not playing at the bar, they’re still always there and Harry even stays over at Niall’s flat on some days.

They’ve got another hour before the bar officially opens and Harry’s sitting on the counter while Josh and Niall do the customary stock check and making sure all the glasses are clean and ready to be used. He’s only 21, but he’s quite tall and lean for his age, making him look much older and has already covered most of his skin in tattoos. Tonight he’s ditched the fedora hat he usually wears to hide his messy curly hair with a dark green bandana wrapped around his head.

He’s wearing jeans that look like they’ve been painted on, but Niall saw him take it off effortlessly once and that still boggles his mind until today, and a black shirt that clings onto his lean body in all the right places.

“So Haz, are you finally going to sing about your feelings for Louis tonight?” Josh asks while he makes sure there’s enough ice in the cooler box they keep under the counter.

“Shut up guys.” Harry whines while he covers his face with his hands. “I wish I never told you idiots.”

“Mate, you never told us shit, it’s pretty obvious you’ve been gone for the guy for the past four months.” Niall scoffs.

Harry groans and dramatically flails his body onto the counter, which makes Josh face twist into a grimace. “Oi! I just got it looking nice and shiny!”

Harry just sticks his tongue out at Josh and ignores him, though he does take his gangly legs off and leaves them hanging over the counter.  He’s the youngest out of all of them, but he’s one of the most hardworking people that Niall knows. Harry told him about how he knew he wanted to sing since he was young, and as soon as he left high school he left his little country town to move to the big city, taking up busking gigs to make a living. That was how he med Ed, and that’s when they formed their two-piece band, Ed on the guitar while Harry’s on vocals. Niall had only been working at the bar for a few months when these two secured a regular gig there, and he’d taken an instant liking to them, especially Harry since the two of them shared similar backgrounds.

“The other day he asked me what rhymes with Lou…though he was trying to make it seem as if he was writing a song about a toilet.” Ed joins in the teasing and Harry shoots him an insulted glare at him while mumbling traitor under his breath.

The three boys laugh at Harry’s expense and he sulks angrily, but Niall knows that he can’t stay mad for long. True enough a smile breaks across his face when Josh wrestles him off the counter and onto the floor, the two of them throwing friendly punches – though he’s not sure if they’re actually just swatting their hands at each other. Niall just chuckles and shakes his head as he watches them scuffle around and thinks back to his conversation with his mum earlier that day, he knows for certain that his mum has nothing to worry about because he made the right decision moving here.

* * *

The clock hits seven and the doors finally open and people start trickling in. It starts off a little slow, with Niall and Josh still able to joke around with Harry and Ed in between serving customers, but Niall knows that it won’t last long before the after-work rush start coming in.

Louis Tomlinson comes in just after eight straight from the office, wearing a white checked shirt and black pants, with his brown hair slicked back and not a hair out of place despite it being the end of the day.  He’s the one that Harry’s been infatuated with since the first time he walked into the pub a few months ago, although they found out pretty quickly that he was engaged to his high school sweetheart.

He’s become one of the pub’s regular customers, and Niall always enjoys that part of the night when he gets to catch up with Louis. He’s a friendly guy, a lot like Niall, who’s always making conversations and joking around with other patrons of the pub, playing rounds of pool and darts with them well into midnight. Niall’s used to hearing loud cheers coming from wherever Louis is standing, no doubt charming the pants off the crowd.

It was probably just two months ago when Niall got to find out that there was a lot more to Louis than his loud exterior.

It was a particularly slow night and Louis had spent all his time at the front of the bar, ordering drink after drink and getting pretty drunk.

“Hey mate, everything ok?” Niall decided to ask after his 5^th or 6^th drink, and he took it upon himself to cut Louis off for the night. Louis looked up at him and had the saddest look on his face, and that’s when Niall knew that he wasn’t all that cheerful as he seemed.

“Just peachy mate. Get me another of these will ya?” He gestures to the glass in front of him that’s still half full.

“Nah mate, I’m cutting you off. You’ve had enough for tonight.”

“Oh come on, just one more, I’m fine!” Louis raises his arms in an exasperated motion.

He lets out a sad laugh when Niall fixes him with a hard glare, and Niall stands surprised because he’s never seen Louis this forlorn before and he wonders what’s causing him so much distress.

“I’m having a baby you know.” Louis says when he sees Niall looking at him curiously.

“That’s great! Congrats man!” Niall then thinks maybe he misunderstood, maybe Louis’s actually drinking in celebration. But then he sees how the smile doesn’t stretch across his face as it usually does, and notices those striking blue eyes look a little glassy as he stares down at his hands.

“Yeah. She just told me last night. Wanna know something funny? I finally plucked up the courage to break up with her last week. But she was poorly, so I put it off, didn’t want to kick her while she was down you know?” Louis pauses for a while, staring at his glass before throwing it back and finishing the drink in one go. “Then this morning she tells me she went to the clinic to get checked and the doctor said she’s pregnant.”

Niall just nods slowly, and he knows there are other patrons waiting for him to serve them a drink, but he gestures to Josh to take care of them. Louis looked like he needed someone to talk to, and Niall couldn’t just leave him hanging like that.

“It’s just we’ve been together for so long…since we were in high school, and I really do love her but…something was always missing you know? Realised maybe she wasn’t what I wanted.”

“What do you mean?”

Louis glances up at him, as if suddenly aware of his surroundings and quickly shakes his head. “Nothing mate. Sorry for being a killjoy tonight yeah. I think I’m just tired…I’ll- I’ll see you tomorrow.” Louis shoots Niall a wide grin that he would think was genuine if he couldn’t see through it thanks to his behaviour just a few minutes before. Niall watches as Louis walks away and wonders what kind of weight the other lad must carry on his shoulders that’s gotten him so down.

Niall ends up finding out what’s bothering Louis a couple of days later. He walks into the toilet to find Louis pressed against the wall with another guy’s tongue down his throat, making Niall stop in his tracks. They don’t notice him, too busy making out, and Niall quietly steps out before they do.

He watches Louis more intently after that and finally understands why he was upset when he found out his girlfriend was pregnant. He notices how Louis will flirt with girls at the bar but trades suggestive glances with guys instead, always disappearing into the toilet or the alley behind the bar with them.

It doesn’t become a secret for long. They never talk openly about it, but everyone’s walked in on Louis and a random guy in the toilet at some point. It’s sad that it raises Harry’s hopes a little, although they all think that it’s a pretty fucked up situation especially with his now fiancé and a baby on the way.

Niall hasn’t seen that seen that side of Louis again, although he does openly talk about Eleanor his fiancé and their unborn baby a lot more, though Niall can’t help but think that it’s all a little fake.

 “NIALL HORAN! My favourite Irishman this side of London. Fix me up a drink will ya, surprise me!”

 “Hiya Tommo, you alright?” Niall asks after handing him his drink.

“Thanks, I’m doing good mate. I’ll see ya later alright?” He says and then disappears into the crowd, though Niall’s pretty sure he’ll be seeing him again at some point in the night.

Harry and Ed get ready to take the stage at about nine but just before they start, Harry comes by to ask Niall if Liam, another one of their friends, has been in yet.

 “Nah, he’s not. Think he said he was bringing his date to the movies before popping in.”

Niall catches the way Harry’s face falls a little though he quickly covers it up with a smirk. “Another date huh? Who set him up this time?”

Niall just shrugs and Harry gets back to the stage after Ed comes to them and physically pulls him there because he doesn’t want them to start late.

Liam comes in with his date at about half past nine, wearing a plain white tee and a denim shirt left unbuttoned over it, baggy jeans that hang low on his hips and a pair of Timbaland boots on his feet. He’s one of the most attractive guys that come in here, and Niall’s always getting asked by girls and guys alike about whether they can have his number when they find out that he’s good friends with Liam.

Although tonight Liam isn’t alone, as he walks into the bar while a petite brunette follows behind him. She’s a sweet looking girl, but Niall knows right from the bat that there won’t be a second date. Liam’s been on a lot of dates over the past few months, and he’s yet to find someone he’s interested in enough to see again.

The two of them settle down somewhere near the stage, and before long Liam heads over to the bar to get some drinks.

“Who’ve you dragged in tonight Liam?” Louis comes over at the same time, because whenever Liam has one of his dates at the bar, it’s like entertainment for the rest of the boys who are always watching him and making fun of the way Liam stumbles his way through the entire thing, especially when he’s not interested in the person at all.

“Her name’s Dinah and she’s a really sweet girl.” Liam says, but Niall just stares at him and rolls his eyes. Liam wouldn’t ever say anything bad about his dates, even if he hated them.

Harry comes over then, after letting the crowd know that The Pingu Brothers are taking a quick break, though from the way Ed is glaring at him, it looks like it was more Harry’s decision. He swings his arm around Liam’s shoulders and gives him a little nudge with his hips before asking Niall to pour him a beer.

“You’re late today, I thought you were gonna miss the set!” Harry pouts.

Liam smiles fondly at him as he reaches to ruffle Harry’s already messy hair. “You know I wouldn’t miss it Haz.”

It’s only then that Niall notices how dishevelled Liam’s appearance is, the way his lips look red and swollen and Niall is pretty sure there’s a hickey right next to the birthmark on his neck. Niall shakes his head as he prepares the three beers for Liam and his date, and Harry. “Looks like Dinah isn’t so sweet.” He shoots a wink down Liam’s way while the other lad just blushes furiously and looks down.

“Get in Payno!”  Louis exclaims when he puts two and two together, slapping Liam on the back and cheering him with his beer.

Harry however, has a stern look on his face that ends up looking comical more than serious. “Liam, how many times have I told you not to take advantage of your dates? Especially if you’re not planning on taking them on a second date!”

About a year ago Liam had just gotten out of a long term relationship with his then girlfriend Danielle, who he was convinced he was going to marry someday. He was absolutely gutted when the relationship ended and ended up at the bar every night drinking his sorrows away. There had been one too many times that Niall had to hear a drunken rant from Liam about how Danielle was perfect and he was so sure that she was the one and it was such a shame that things didn’t work out.

The thing about Liam is that he’s never been single for long, and he made it pretty clear that he hates being alone. So within a month of his break up with Danielle, he was already going on dates to try to mend his broken heart. He told everyone he knew that he was up for being set up on blind dates, and almost everyone working in the pub had already done that. Josh had introduced his friend’s sister to him (but she was apparently too loudspoken for him), Ed set him up with one of his buddies who was also a singer (but Liam said he was too deep and thoughtful) and even Paul set him up with his nephew once (and thank goodness it was the nephew who wasn’t interested, or else Liam was scared he’d have to go through Paul’s wrath of rejecting his nephew). So far no one stuck around, and he was still relentless in his pursuit of finding love.

Harry had a huge problem with it, especially whenever he found Liam with a hickey on his neck or walked in on him making out with his date against the wall next to the toilets. Harry thought it was unfair, that Liam was leading them on because he had never taken anyone else on a second date. It’s not that Liam was fussy, but it was like he had a specific picture in mind of who he wanted and no one fit the bill, which was fair, but after a dozen or so fruitless dates, it was stated to get a little boring watching him reject every single one of them. Though it didn’t stop him from having a bit of a pash session every now and then.

Niall walks away from the boys to attend to other customers, choosing to ignore Harry lecturing Liam since he’s heard it a dozen times before and chuckles when he watches Ed come over and drag Harry away to start on their second set.

*  *  *

It’s a quarter to 10 when Niall finally glances at his watch after a long hour of serving drinks and cleaning up behind the bar. He tells Jade, one of the bargirls working there, that he’s taking a break then quickly ducks into the staff toilet before Josh can notice and throw him a teasing smirk.

There’s a little break room beside the kitchen for the staff to keep their stuff and Niall walks in and takes a quick look at his reflection in the small mirror one of the girls put up on the wall to make sure that his quiff is still standing up. He rifles through his backpack and takes out a bottle of cologne and give himself a quick spray, it was the first thing he bought with his first paycheque and only uses it at work once in a while especially if he wants to attract a certain someone.

He tries to walk back into the bar without Josh noticing but no such luck, Josh catches his eye and wiggles his eyebrows at him, and Niall just shakes his head, busying himself with a drink order. He gets distracted for another 10 minutes, before Josh slides next to him and knocks his shoulder against his.

“Your boy’s here.”

Niall’s face quickly shoots up, scanning the bar and ignoring the smirk that Josh throws his way.   He’d be embarrassed about his obvious enthusiasm but before he gets the chance to act nonchalant, he catches sight of a familiar black leather jacket slyly hiding between the bodies of people. He can’t see at first, what with the many people lined up at the bar to order their drinks, but then in a desperate attempt to get a better view he gets on his tippy toes, straining his neck to see over the sea of heads and then almost stumbles when he sees the face he’s been searching for.

Olive-coloured skin, a jet black hair that’s styled into a perfect quiff that would put Niall’s own to shame, and the most mesmerising hazel-brown eyes. The leather jacket is hanging off these broad shoulders with a plain white shirt underneath and a wishbone necklace hanging round his neck with diamond studs in each ear.

He’s snapped out of his staring by a rude slap to his bottom by Josh, who continues to wiggle his eyebrows suggestively at him while jerking his head towards the guy who’s got his attention, Zayn.

Zayn. Zayn Malik. Niall doesn’t know much about him, except when he first came into the pub and ordered a drink about three months ago, Niall almost dropped the glass that he was holding in his hand because he was so mesmerised by the gorgeous man standing in front of him.

Niall’s heard that he’s an upcoming artist, and he’s noticed when Zayn comes in with colour splattered all over his jeans sometimes or has dried paint on his fingers as he takes a bottle of beer from Niall’s hands. He usually comes in during the weekends, just after 10pm every time, and it’s the highlight of Niall’s night.

In the beginning it was just a silly crush, more on Niall obsessing over Zayn’s sharp cheekbones and ridiculously long eyelashes, and wondering how it would feel to run his fingers through that thick black hair. But then over time as he got to know Zayn better, he really enjoyed talking to him, and although Zayn never gave too much about himself away, Niall knew that he was a decent guy.

He’s never done anything about his feelings though, preferring to keep them to himself (and Josh – because apparently he isn’t so subtle about his staring, and unfortunately Harry too), because he isn’t even sure if Zayn is into guys. Although he’s pretty sure with a face like that, Zayn probably had a long line of people waiting to throw themselves at him.

Niall just shoves Josh away and rolls his eyes, hoping that the low lights hide the blush that’s creeping across his pale cheeks. He gets back to making more drinks, but there’s still a part of him that stays aware of Zayn’s every move. He’s sitting next to Louis, apparently they’ve known each other for a long time, while listening to Harry and Ed playing on stage, his feet tapping along with the rhythm while his hands are resting in his pockets and Niall can see a fleck of dried blue paint just in the crook of his neck that he keeps scratching at and Niall’s itching to wipe it off with his dishtowel.

That’s when Niall decides he needs to focus on his job at hand instead of creepily noticing Zayn’s little movements.

He does manage to get himself distracted for a couple of minutes when things get a little busy, and when some of the crowd have disappeared after getting their drinks, Niall’s not surprised when Zayn finally makes his way towards the bar. He tries to look busy, but he can’t help the way his breath hitches a bit when Zayn gets close enough that Niall can smell his cologne – something expensive, it smells like leather, with a dash of musk and a little bit of spice.

Niall tries to pretend like his every sense isn’t heightened by Zayn’s presence and continues to mix up a few Long Island Ice Teas for these three ladies that are waiting at the counter, and when he puts the drinks in front of them he notices that their attention is elsewhere. He’s not surprised that it’s in Zayn’s direction, because he has the kind of beauty that deserves to be acknowledged, and God know if he had the chance he’d stare at Zayn’s face all day.

He chuckles quietly to himself before moving down the counter to stand in front of Zayn. His heart is beating out of his chest and it’s ridiculous how he can feel butterflies in his stomach, as if he’s some lovestruck teenager, but he couldn’t help the way he felt when he sees Zayn looking at him. There’s a wide smile on his face, his eyes crinkling up around the edges, and he does this unusual thing where you can see his tongue pressed up against his teeth when he smiles. Niall finds it adorable, and it’s never fails to make him grin from ear to ear in return.

“What can I get you tonight?”

Niall knows Zayn will order a whiskey on the rocks to start off his night, and so he tries not to punch the air when Zayn does just that.

“Looks busy tonight.”

Niall just shrugs as he fills the glass and places it on the counter in front of him.

“Cheers.” Zayn says, raising his glass to Niall a little before taking a sip from it.

“How’s Liam’s date going?” Niall asks him, because he knows that Zayn likes to join in their teasing, though he spends most of his night next to Louis.

“He got bored about half an hour ago. Lou heard him telling the girl that he didn’t want to talk anymore because he wanted to listen to the band.”

Niall laughs out loud and shakes his head, quickly glancing past Zayn to see what Liam’s up to. True enough, he’s left the poor girl sitting alone while he watches the band playing intently.

“So how’s your week been?” Niall decides to bring his attention back to Zayn, because he doesn’t get more than these five minutes when he comes over to buy a drink, and Niall always finds himself trying to get the most out of it as he can.

Zayn just shrugs, looking bored at his glass. He doesn’t say anything, and Niall doesn’t want to push him.

“

* * *

Niall wakes up the next morning to a couple of messages from Harry, all asking him about meeting him for lunch. It’s already noon, and so Niall quickly gets ready to see him, walking out of his flat while his hair is still wet and lying flat against his head.

They agree to meet at the café just down the corner from Niall’s, and Harry’s not there yet so he grabs a table near the window and orders himself a coffee. Harry comes in 15 minutes later, looking frazzled and like he’s ready to skin someone alive.

“Why the fuck is he planning a wedding if he’s got a baby on the way?” Harry says as he slams a file onto the table.

“Hello to you too Haz.” Niall says with a smirk as he takes a sip out of his cup, thankful that he was already holding it in his hand or else he would undoubtedly have a coffee stain on his crotch from the force that Harry put on the table.

“I mean seriously, she’s too busy being pregnant and can’t go looking at flower arrangements cause it makes her nauseous or something and he doesn’t give two fucks about his fiancé let alone the flowers and I’m the one that’s going around like a headless chicken to make sure she gets what she wants.”

Harry spits it all out in one breath and when he finished, it’s like he’s released all the tension in his body and his shoulders relax and his face doesn’t look so pinched by the time he manages to wave a waiter over.

“Chamomile tea please.” Niall scoffs at his drink choice but really, what did he expect. Harry was always into that kind of stuff.

“If I’m not mistaken, didn’t you sign up for this yourself?”

Harry lets out a sigh, and Niall notes how young he looks, and it’s so easy to forget that he’s the youngest out of all of them, and the one who probably needs the most support.

“I know…but then I mentioned that I helped my sister with her wedding and…” Harry pauses, and his green eyes are twinkling in the sunlight but there’s a sadness to them that Niall understands. “It’s Lou you know? I couldn’t say no to him.”

Niall just nods, doesn’t add anything because as much as it upsets him to see Harry like this, there’s nothing he can say that would change the fact that he was head over heels in love with Louis.

“Anyway, I saw you talking to Zayn last night. Did you find out anything else about our resident mysterious Romeo?”

Niall cringes when he hears the word Romeo and shrugs in response to Harry’s question.

“Just talked about Liam’s date a little bit. Then he went back to the table.”

Harry’s tea arrives then and Niall watches as he pours the water into the mug meticulously and slowly stirs it with his spoon. He’s got his fedora on today, and he’s wearing a red and black flannel shirt that’s got the first few buttons undone, low enough that Harry’s butterfly tattoo on his stomach is visible.

“Didn’t get a chance to talk to him after I came offstage. Was too busy talking to Liam and giving him another earful. Did you see the way he just abandoned that poor date of his? I was almost going to stop the set midway and tell him to stop being ridiculous but I was scared that Ed was going to hit me with his guitar.” Niall laughs, almost choking on the hot coffee that goes down his throat.

 “Last time we were talking about the next tattoo he wanted to get, a snake or something around his back and onto his shoulder. Sounded sick.” Niall just nods absentmindedly, his mind already distracted into wondering what other tattoos Zayn has that he hasn’t seen yet, whether he’d ever get a chance to see them all up close.

On some of the warmer days when Zayn leaves his leather jacket at home and wears just a shirt on or has the sleeves rolled up, Niall gets to peek at the tattoos filling up the space on his left arm. It’s a mix of random stuff, like a microphone, a palm tree, a bandana around his elbow, and Niall’s favourite which was the ZAP! tattoo that was designed like something out of a comic.

“He doesn’t really talk much either does he?” Niall snaps back to his conversation with Harry and nods in agreement. “Remember that time Liam said he had a comic book collection he got so excited he wouldn’t stop going on about it? I think he spoke more that night than he has all year.”

Niall remembers, could see the way Zayn’s eyes lit up when Liam mentioned something about reading his Marvel comics over the weekend and he’d quickly jumped in and said he had a collection of his own. Niall spent the rest of the night wondering if he’d ever be able to put that look on Zayn’s face.

“Oh! I forgot to say!” Harry’s eyes widen comically and there’s a look of guilt that flashes across his face. “Lou mentioned that he’s got an art studio somewhere nearby the bar. That’s why he’s comes round.”

Niall should probably be surprised, but he’s already heard about that and suspected it himself for a while now.

“I know he’s mentioned that he does a bit of artwork. Though I didn’t realise it was his job. He does looks like the artist type doesn’t he?” Niall says and Harry lets out a little laugh before agreeing.

“Do you think he’s single?” Niall shrugs and that – that’s something he doesn’t want to think about. Because Zayn was gorgeous, with his sharp jawline and impeccable cheekbones and he just oozed sexiness from every part of his body and it would be a surprise if he didn’t already have someone.

“Ugh I hope he isn’t like Liam.” Harry rolls his eyes over his cup of tea while Niall just raises his eyebrows at him. “He can’t make up his mind, can he?”

“I thought you weren’t into labels anyway?” Niall says as he finishes the last of his coffee, and flips through the menu to figure out what to have for lunch.

“I’m not – it’s just, he’s not doing it because of that is he? He’s just doing that to find anyone who will fill that hole in his heart since his ex left him.”

“We can’t judge him for that Haz. It’s not like he’s fooling around with them and then leaving them dry. He just…he’s got a lot of love to give. I mean come on, you’ve seen him on those dates, he’s never been anything short of a gentleman. Yeah, he gets his tongue down their throat every now and then but he’s got needs after all.”

“It’s just – he’s great you know? You know the other day I had lunch with him and mentioned that needed a new jacket for autumn and the next day he bought me one? I didn’t want to accept it at first but he did that whole…puppy eyes thing that made you feel guilty if you said no to him.” Harry shakes his head sadly as he looks out the window and absently stirs his tea. “He’d be the perfect boyfriend to anyone. Like you said, he’s got so much love to give, then why is he throwing it around to these random people that he doesn’t even know if he wants or not?”

“Everyone’s got their own way of sharing their love Haz. Just like how you’re helping to plan the guy you’re in love with’s (“Hey! I’m not in love with him!”) wedding. How I’m pining after a guy I barely know. And Liam…Liam’s just putting his net out and hoping that one day a fish will catch.”

Harry just keeps quiet though Niall knows he’s got an argument on his tongue, but instead he just snaps his mouth shut and shrugs. Niall wishes it was all a little more easier for them to get what they wanted, but maybe some things just had to run its own course.

* * *

It’s the next weekend and the crowd is in full swing at the bar. Niall hasn’t had a chance to catch a breath since his shift started and he’s barely even looked up from behind the bar.

Louis is standing in a corner talking to some tall brunette who looks like he’s barely gotten out of high school. Niall tries to shoot Louis a warning look when he comes over to the bar to get a drink, but instead Louis avoids him and goes straight to Josh with his order, which means that he knows what he’s doing and probably feeling ashamed about it.

The Pingu Brothers aren’t playing today, and Liam doesn’t have a date, so the two of them take up space at the end of the bar while Harry shoots death glares towards Louis and complains about him.

“Did you know she can’t even stomach cake testings? Cake!? Who the fuck gets sick over cake when they’re pregnant?”

“Does she know that you’re helping him?” Liam asks gently.

Harry just shrugs in response. “I don’t know. We don’t really talk about her much. Lou only mentions her if he wants me to do something that she can’t.” He says quietly.

“We were supposed to go cake testing the other day during his lunch hour. He sent me back a text saying that he got distracted and bailed on me. I had to go there alone.” He jerks his head in Louis direction. “Guess what was the distraction? Or I guess I should say who.”

Right on cue, Louis comes walking up to them, swinging his arms around Harry and Liam’s shoulders, clearly already drunk off his mind.

“Hello there boys, what are we talking about?”

“Who’s your friend Lou?” Josh asks, getting straight to the point though Harry looks at him in horror.

“Oh him? Just some new intern at work. He’s new in town and well…thought I’d show him around.” He gives a nervous laugh before excusing himself to the men’s.

Niall doesn’t mention that the new intern went in that direction just a few minutes earlier too. Liam watches as Louis walks away and when he’s out of sight, he shakes his head angrily.

 “Have none of you actually tried to talk to him?” Josh asks while he grabs a bottle of whiskey from under the bar.

Niall shakes his head as he wipes up some spillage on the counter, letting out a sigh. “Haz tried to give him on of his lectures but…he always denies it. When I caught him in the toilet once, he said it was just harmless fun. How are we supposed to help someone who’s so far in denial?”

“I don’t get it. He’s engaged to his long-term girl and he’s got a baby on the way. Why isn’t he happy?” Liam asks, there’s a touch of anger in his voice, but his eyes just look sad.

“We don’t know the full story Li.” Harry tries to defend him, though Niall knows he’s just as upset about it as Liam is.

“I know it’s just – I’m going on date after date just trying to find someone I can have that life with you know? And he…he’s got it all but he’s just throwing it away for what? A quick handjob with a random stranger before he goes home to the missus?” He sighs and shakes his head, rubbing his hand over his face.

“I just…I thought I’d be in his position by now you know? Have a proper house somewhere out of the city, two kids in school and a big dog running around.” He takes another sip from his glass and watches as the liquid swirls around. “That’s all I ever wanted. A family. Taking trips to the park and doing school rounds and all that. Don’t care if it was a bird or a lad. I just…I just want someone to love.”

Just then they hear Louis’s howling laugh as he walks out of the toilet, his latest hook up walking out just moments later. Niall watches as Louis returns to his table and tries to smooth out his messy hair that was slicked back when he first came in. He’s smiling wide and laughing, but Niall can see how his smile doesn’t quite reach his eyes, and he’s pretty sure that Louis even looks a little guilty.

Harry’s looking at him too, before he gets up to stand behind Liam and hugs him from the back. “Oh Li…you’ll find someone. You deserve all of that.”

Liam smiles as he tilts his head to look at Harry, and Niall can see the fondness wash over his face when he nods. “It’s fine guys. I’ll get over it. Another drink Niall?”

Niall gives him a small smile. “Think you’ve had enough tonight mate.”

Liam nods, knowing that he’s gone over his limit. Harry pulls him away towards the dance floor on the pretense that Liam’s favourite song is playing and they need to get rid of all the tension. He follows after Harry shaking his head like it’s a bad idea but Niall ends up watching the two of them pull stupid moves for the next half an hour as they try to make each other laugh and forget about their worries.

* * *

It’s a slow night during the middle of the week at the pub and Niall doesn’t expect any of the boys to come round. Harry’s helping Louis with some more wedding stuff while Liam’s gone down to visit his parents, and it’s been raining all day and looking pretty miserable outside.

Josh is out for a smoke break and Niall’s having a sneaky look at his phone when he hears someone knocking on the counter behind him. He turns to face them, and his breath catches in his throat when he sees Zayn standing in front of him. He’s got a lopsided grin on his face, his hair hidden under a grey beanie that looks soaked from the rain. He’s shrugged off his jacket, and is wearing a thick black Nike jumper that looks comfortable for the current weather. He looks different, usually he’s dressed like he’s put a lot of thought into it, but today he looks more casual, though Niall still thinks that he looks sexy even if that jumper makes him want to cuddle under the covers in this weather with him.

Niall’s speechless for a minute, before he gathers his senses and returns the smile, walking closer and slipping his phone back into his pocket.

“Hey…” Zayn takes his beanie off and runs his fingers through his slightly wet hair before taking a seat on the bar stool, rolling up his sleeves and giving Niall another chance to take a look at his tattoos and he takes a minute to admire the bright red and yellow “ZAP!” standing out from the olive skin.

“What you doing here mate? Didn’t think anyone would come in with all the rain outside.” Niall doesn’t mention that it’s also a weekday – and Zayn rarely comes in during the week.

“Nah, it calmed down a little when I walked over. Been cooped up all day, just wanted to get out you know?”

Niall nods and before he realises he’s pouring whiskey in a glass for Zayn before he even asks.

“Am I that predictable?” Zayn says as he lets out a quiet laugh.

Niall blushes and rubs the back of his neck embarrassingly, afraid that he’s just let out the fact that he knows what kind of drink Zayn likes depending on the day or situation.

“It’s my job to know what you drink.” He says trying to cover up, and it looks like it works because Zayn just laughs at him before raising the glass to his lips.

Since there’s not a lot of people, the two of them actually get to chat for a little bit with no interruptions. Even Josh keeps to his side of the bar and barely comes over except if he needs something, though he does take every opportunity to tease Niall when he can.

It’s nice, being able to talk to Zayn like this. Niall feels relaxed and the whole conversation feels carefree and Niall doesn’t feel nervous thinking about something to talk about.

“So…you know you’ve never told us what it is you do?”

Zayn smiles and the light catches in his eyes, making it sparkle a little and Niall’s heart beats a lot faster, he has to grip onto the counter to stop himself from doing something stupid like pull Zayn in for a kiss. Even though that would be nice, very very nice.

“I like to paint. It’s…not a job or anything. I just try to sell my work wherever I can.”

Niall just grins at him. “Thought so. Sometimes you come in with a bit of dried paint on some part of yourself.”

Zayn shakes his head in embarrassment. “Caught that did you?”

Niall feels his cheeks redden and quickly tries to change the subject. “I can’t draw for shit.”

Zayn’s quiet for a bit, looks at him with a serious look on his face. “But you’d be perfect to draw.”

Niall swears he didn’t hear that last bit correctly. So he just stares wide-eyed at Zayn. “What?”

There’s a look that crosses Zayn’s face for a moment that Niall can’t read, but Zayn just shrugs and mumbles a quick nothing before finishing his drink.

He quickly changes the subject to Niall, and asks a bit more about himself. Niall’s embarrassed, just shrugs and tells him there’s not much to tell. But Zayn’s eyes are kind, and he looks at Niall like he genuinely wants to know, and so Niall finds himself rambling on for the next ten minutes about why he wanted to come to London, and how he loves his life here. Zayn talks a bit about himself too, telling Niall about moving from his hometown Bradford to attend art school in London, and then sticking around to make a living.  Niall loves hearing about it, and he gets to find out more about Zayn than he’s ever known over the course of the hour.

Niall gets pulled away for a bit to serve a group of customers, but when he beings his attention back to Zayn, he’s surprised to find a basket of hot chips in front of him.

“You said you were hungry earlier.” Zayn says and Niall has to control himself once again not to grab his face and kiss him right there and then.

They chat for a little bit longer before Zayn says he has to get back to the studio to finish up on some work. “I’m running a little low on funds and need to get ready a couple of paintings to sell.”

Niall tries not to show how disappointed he feels because he didn’t want the night to end, was really enjoying Zayn’s company and getting to know him better.

“Well if you need any help, let me know.” Niall attempts to joke, hoping that it doesn’t fall short.

Zayn lets out a loud laugh and the light hits his face at the right time that Niall can see the way his eyes twinkle and they crinkle up around the edges and-

He looks so beautiful that it takes Niall’s breath away.

“Niall? Is something wrong?” Niall snaps back from his thoughts and his throat goes dry and he can’t bring himself to speak because he realises that it’s probably clear to see that he’s looking at Zayn like he’s hung the moon and the stars in the sky.

“Oh don’t mind him, reckon he’s just realised he forgot to make the three drinks I asked him for earlier.” Niall thanks his lucky stars that Josh interrupts them then.

Niall nods and abruptly moves to the opposite side and doesn’t turn to see the confused look on Zayn’s face.

“Anyway, I’m selling the paintings at the local market on Sundays. Come by yeah?” Zayn as he gets up from the stool.

Zayn just stands there looking at him, and Niall realises that he’s waiting for an answer, so he just nods slowly at him and tries to conjure up some sort of smile. It does the trick and Zayn smiles back at him, looking like he’s happy Niall said yes, and then leaves.

“So that could be considered a date right?” Josh says as he sidles up to Niall when Zayn leaves.

“Shut up.” Niall spits out and Josh does, but he doesn’t stop teasing Niall about the smile that’s permanently on his face for the rest of the night.

* * *

Niall wakes up the next morning to a very dry mouth and there’s a continuous pounding in his head that’s making his eyes hurt even more than they already do when he opens them to the bright sunlight shining in through the window that. He takes a minute to fully wake up and then the memory of last night comes to mind, and he whines into his pillow as he remembers how he choked up in front of Zayn and looked like a proper weirdo stumbling over his words like that. He’d spent the rest of the night after Zayn left downing drink after drink in his body weight eventhough he wasn’t supposed to while he was on the clock, but there wasn’t a lot of people coming in anyway and he was too embarrassed to care. Josh just chuckled at his expense and encouraged him, and Niall doesn’t really remember much of last night.

Niall shouts into his pillow in an effort to let all his frustration out, and when he stops he still doesn’t feel any better. His mouth tastes weird and he’s pretty sure it’s because he must have thrown up a couple of times last night, silently hoping that it was nowhere on the floor of his flat because he really wasn’t up to cleaning up his dried-up vomit. He can’t remember anything else, doesn’t even know how he got home…but the more he thinks about it, the more he remembers that someone followed him back and he’s suddenly awake at the thought that he brought someone home last night. Just then, he hears the bed creak and feels it dip next to him.

He turns his head and almost rolls out of the bed when he sees Harry sitting cross-legged on the other side with a bowl of cereal in his hand. He’s got that hideous bandana tied around his hair, and when he sees Niall looking at him he gives him a wide grin before bringing the spoonful of cereal to his mouth.

“Morning!” Harry says cheerfully, almost splattering the cereal all over Niall.

Niall blinks once, twice, still not believing that Harry Styles was in his bed.

“What…are you doing here?” He doesn’t remember Harry coming into the bar last night.

“You don’t remember? Oh well I suppose you don’t considering you were well smashed last night. What happened mate? I thought you were Irish! You’re supposed to be drinking us all under the table!” Harry laughs and keeps going on and on about something and Niall’s head hurts even more because he can’t begin to understand what he’s talking about.

“Haz…”

“Right. Came by the bar just before closing. You were so drunk that I couldn’t send you home alone. Jumped in the cab before you slammed it in my face and so I came back with you and we slept together.” Harry replies in a deadpan voice.

Niall’s suddenly very aware of the face that he’s only wearing his boxers underneath the covers and that Harry is sitting in front of him in just a pair of sweatpants and his mind starts thinking about all the ways they must have crossed the line last night. Harry must see the worried expression on Niall’s face, and only adds to hia horror when he wiggles his eyebrows suggestively making Niall turn his face into his pillow and let out another groan, hoping that it’s all just a nightmare.

Harry sets his bowl on the nightstand and leans in close to whisper in Niall’s ear. “You really know how to scream baby.”

Niall whips his head up so fast which only makes Harry double up and fall back on the bed while clutching his stomach and laughing hysterically.

“I’m just joking, but the look on your face!”

Niall grabs his pillow from under his bed and starts hitting Harry until he’s begging for him to stop. Harry sits up next to him laughing until he’s out of breath while Niall sinks back down under his covers and lets out a strangled cry as he feels his headache throbbing worse than ever.

“I hate you.”

“That’s not very nice. I helped tuck you in and everything!” Niall can’t see Harry’s face but he’s pretty sure the other boy is pouting and he sticks his hand up and tries to swat at him.

“Fine, fine, you’re probably feeling shitty huh. I tried to get you to drink some water but you wouldn’t listen.” He feels Harry get off the bed and step out the room, returning moments later and setting a glass of water next to his head.

“Get up and take these ibuprofen pills.”

Niall lifts his head just enough to swallow the pills and down the water and pats Harry’s hip gratefully before closing his eyes again.

“Yeah, yeah. Get some rest. I’ll whip up something for lunch and wake you up then.”

“I take it back. I love you Haz.” Niall mumbles into the pillow and looks up to see Harry shaking his head fondly before ruffling his hair and quietly closing the door behind him as he left the room.

Niall falls asleep almost immediately, dreaming of hazel eyes and black hair.

* * *

“Shit Haz, forget Louis, marry me instead.” Niall says as he stuffs a spoonful of scrambled eggs in his mouth.

Niall woke up half an hour ago to a delicious smell wafting through the flat. He walked into the kitchen to find Harry had dished up a proper fry up with bacon, sausages, eggs and even did some hash browns which Niall didn’t even know he had potatoes for. It looked like he pretty much finished most of the groceries he the week before, but Niall couldn’t care less about that because he was absolutely starved.

“Yeah but I can’t risk you leaving me for Zayn.” Harry replies slyly.

Niall almost chokes on his toast. “I’m not- I don’t-“

“You’re infatuated with him.”

“I’m not infatuated with him, I just…admire his face.”

Harry scoffs as he takes a bite out of his toast.

“Seriously though. I don’t understand why you won’t make a move Niall.”

Niall just keeps quiet and shoves a piece of bacon into his mouth, choosing not to answer. Harry just sighs and shakes his head, kissing Niall on the cheek before taking the empty plates to the sink and starting on the wash.

* * *

It’s a gorgeous Sunday afternoon and Harry drags Niall out of his flat to get some brunch. He’s holed up in his flat every day except to go in for work, and he hasn’t seen Zayn again despite it being the weekend and he tries not to think that he could be the reason. They’re just walking out of the restaurant when they happen to bump into Louis with a gorgeous brunette girl on his arm.

“Lou!” Niall says when Louis notices the two of them walking towards him.

“Hey mate.”

Harry keeps quiet next to Niall, and offers an awkward wave.

It’s then that Niall realises that the girl next to Louis must be his fiancé judging from the bump on her stomach.

“You must be Eleanor. So nice to meet you.”

She smiles and returns the greeting, and Louis quickly introduces them as his friends. She looks like a sweet girl, with her hand protectively resting on her swollen belly. Louis mentions that they’ve just done a bit of shopping for the baby, and Eleanor glows as she shows Niall what they just got. He finds himself feeling a little guilty, congratulating this girl when he knew that what her fiancé was up to in the nights.

They say their goodbyes quickly and Niall notices that Harry’s been quiet the whole time. “Harry, you okay?”

“First time I’ve seen her. She’s pretty isn’t she?” he says solemnly. “He looked happy…like genuinely happy…So why’s he doing this?”

Niall sighs slowly. “I don’t know Haz…”

“You know…hearing Liam talking about it the other day got me thinking…it’s true, Louis does have the life that a lot of people would love to have.” He pauses, and then after a beat says, “That’s what I want too…”

Niall doesn’t know what to say, and so instead he puts his hand over Harry’s shoulder and pulls him closer, hoping that it offers some sort of comfort. He suddenly remembers that Zayn mentioned showing his artwork at a local Sunday market, and he knows Harry loves going to these kinda things so he suggests it and loves the way Harry’s face immediately lights up.

He doesn’t mention to Harry that Zayn might be there, and he tries to steady his heartbeat when he thinks about seeing him.

There’s only one Sunday market near their neighbourhood and they find it easily enough. Harry’s getting excited and looking at each stall with such a huge interest and stops every five minutes to look at something. Niall’s beginning to regret bringing him here because he’s just feeling impatient and the only stall he wants to check out is Zayn’s.

He wanders off a little when Harry’s spending a little too much time at a stall that’s selling different kind of hats and Niall knows that he won’t be leaving any time soon. He walks through the row of shops and sees if he can catch a glimpse of any selling any painting.

He’s walked for quite a bit when he finds one booth selling paintings and when he wonders if it’s the right one, his question is answered when he sees Zayn stepping out and talking to some people. He feels the wind knocked out of his lungs, and feels the nervousness creep back into his veins.

He watches as Zayn walks away with this group of people, and quickly strolls over to the stall to check out what’s on display. It’s pretty easy to figure out which ones were his, Zayn had stacked up most of his canvases against one wall of the stall, and he signed all of them off with a tiny ‘zm’ in the corner. He already knew without seeing Zayn’s work that he was talented, but to see proof of it in front of his eyes was truly amazing. He had no words to describe Zayn’s paintings, and he had stuff like stencil art to graffiti inspired paintings to abstract works on canvases sitting on various easels.

But before he life, he couldn’t help admiring a particular painting that looked absolutely beautiful. The description below said that the painter wanted to capture the city life in motion, and Niall could see that in the way in the way Zayn’s fluid strokes painted out bodies of people weaving through buildings and streets. It reminded him of London, and he really like the way it was done.

One of the other artists there had told him that Zayn would be back in about 10 minutes when they noticed the way he was looking at the painting in interest, but Niall just nodded and made a hasty exit.

He found Harry still standing at the same stall where he left him, but this time holding two new purchases in his hands.

“Where’d you go?” he asks and Niall wonders for a moment whether to tell him, but Harry catches the way Niall looks really embarrassed and he knows that he’s a bad liar and caves in and tells him anyway.

Harry whines and punches Niall in the arm for not bringing him along, and he tries to force him to bring him by there again, but Niall’s too chicken at the thought of seeing Zayn again that he pointedly pulls Harry out of the market despite his protests.

He still can’t get the painting out of his mind and the more he thinks about it, the more he knows that he wants it for himself.

Which is how he ended up dragging Harry and Jade from the bar along with him to the market again the next week with the intention of getting that particular painting. Just before they reached Zayn’s stall, Niall immediately pulled the other two into a poor lady’s flower stall when he saw that the object of his affections was standing right there.

“I don’t understand why we’re hiding out.” Harry whispers loudly.

“Because I don’t want him to see me!”

“This is ridiculous. Why did I let you talk me into this.” Jade whispers as well, as all three of them hide behind buckets of fresh flowers.

Zayn was wearing his leather jacket again, with a black shirt underneath and paired with black skinny jeans. He had a cigarette in one hand while his other was tucked in his jacket, and he was talking to someone while gesturing to his paintings.

He turned to the others and told them the plan. He didn’t want Zayn to know that he was buying his painting because frankly, he was embarrassed and he didn’t want to make a big deal out of it. Also he was pretty sure that Zayn would know how much Niall liked him if he knew.

He asked Harry to distract Zayn away from the stall and then asked, or actually begged, Jade to swing by and get the painting for him. He knew that there was one person in charge of the payments, so Zayn didn’t have to be there when his painting was sold.

Jade and Niall watched as Harry walked up to Zayn and pat him on the back. Niall felt that rush in his veins when he saw the way Zayn’s whole face lit up when he recognised Harry, couldn’t help wondering how beautiful he looked in the daylight. Harry managed to get Zayn to agree to go with him, and Niall took a mental note to pay for Harry’s drinks for the next month.

He quickly stuffed the money into Jade’s hands and pushed her to go before Zayn and Harry came back, because he was sure that Zayn would be able to recognise her since he’s seen her at the bar too. He watches as Jade walked into the stall and looks at the painting that Niall wants.

“Excuse me, are you going to buy anything?” Unfortunately just at that moment the flower stall owner, a lovely elderly woman who looks very annoyed with him clears her throat behind him.

He gives her a string of apologies before ducking out and walking away while still trying to stay near the stall to keep an eye on Jade, who’s talking to this blonde girl excitedly as she hands over the money and takes the painting.

He waves her over to where he’s standing and she passes him the painting. It’s luckily not that big, and she doesn’t have too much of trouble carrying it. Niall gives her a kiss on the cheek to thank her, and takes note that he’ll be indebted to her for a long time too. But it doesn’t matter, his heart feels like it’s flying through the air as he realises he’s got one of Zayn’s paintings in his hands and that it‘s actually his.

They meet up with Harry a few minutes later at the front of the market and he tells them that Zayn was really surprised to see him and they went to grab a quick coffee before coming back to the stall and that Zayn showed him a few of his pieces.

“He really is good.” Niall blushes and even feels a little proud hearing him compliment Zayn eventhough it has nothing to do with him.

“What were you talking with the blonde girl about?” Niall asks Jade when he remembers that she was standing there with her for quite some time.

“Oh she kept trying to persuade me to stay to meet the painter. And she was surprised that I knew what I wanted to get so quick.”

“What did you tell her?”

“I just said one of the guys from my workplace was absolutely in love with the artist and was dying to get his hands on a piece.” Jade says while rolling her eyes.

“Jade!” Niall was horrified.

Zayn definitely can’t know that he bought a painting from him now.

* * *

Harry follows Niall back to his flat after they say bye to Jade at the market, and Niall promises her that he’ll make it up to her soon.

“It was good fun anyways. Good luck with him Niall!” She gives him a little wink and goes on her way, leaving Niall blushing on the street before Harry nudges him along.

The minute they enter, Niall walks straight to his room and takes out an old frame that he found lying around the bar and he just sanded it down and it looked good as new. It was the perfect size for Zayn’s painting and Niall already knew where he was going to hang it up.

There was just empty space on the wall in front of his bed and Niall liked the idea of waking up to it every morning.

“So how much was it?” Harry asks him as he watches Niall put on a few of those plastic hooks on the wall to hold the painting.

“Niall. How much was this painting?” Harry asks again when Niall doesn’t reply him.

“A couple hundred quid.” He mumbles under his breath, but in the quiet of his flat, Harry catches every word.

“What!? Niall! You can’t afford that!”

Niall turns and looks at him sheepishly. “I know but…I deserve to splurge out every now and then yeah?”

“Yeah, on a fancy dinner, or clothes, maybe some new furniture. But this…look it’s a great piece and all but…is that really all why you got it?”

Niall finally hangs up the painting and keeps quiet for a while before stepping back and lying on his bed, staring at the new item adorning his wall in front of him.

“In the beginning…he said he was selling this stuff cause he needed some extra money and I just wanted to help. And I was curious to see his work anyway. But I swear Haz, I fell in love with this the minute I saw it and I just had to get it.”

Harry makes his way to the bed and joins Niall, the two of them lying side by side.

“At least…I don’t know, at least I’ve got a part of him in some way.”

Harry drops his head to rest on Niall’s shoulder and breathes out a sigh. “Guess I can’t argue with that.”

The two of them sit in silence before Harry starts fidgeting his hands in his laps and Niall knows that he’s thinking about Louis. “Lou’s been texting me lots. I’m still helping him with a bit of the wedding stuff…almost made me do some baby shopping the other day and I had to tell him no.”

“What’s the deal between you and him Haz?”

“I don’t know…sometimes he flirts with me while we’re texting and I…I think I still go along with everything cause…it’s like this is my thing with him you know? I don’t have him either but…I’ll take whatever attention I can get.”

Niall nods his head, understanding how Harry feels.

“It’s just…these days I wonder whether my feelings for him are the same as before. Listening to Liam talking about his ideal life the other day…I realised that I wanted that too. I want the family and the kids and the dog, and Louis…Louis is nowhere near that. And I’m not sure whether I want to keep wasting my time. I mean, what am I expecting? That he’ll leave his fiancé and baby for me? That’s…that’s not what I want.”

Harry just sighs against Niall’s shoulder and he can’t help but bring his hand up to pat Harry’s hair comfortingly.

“For what it’s worth, I think there’s still hope for you and Zayn you know.” Harry says.

“I don’t know Haz.”

“You won’t know until you find out Niall.”

It’s true, the only problem is that Niall’s scared to.

* * *

Harry decides that day that he wants to get over Louis once and for all, and spends the next week hiding out in Niall’s flat making up excuses for not helping him anymore and avoiding his phone calls.

He doesn’t even come by to the pub, and Louis comes in every night asking Niall where he is and all he can do is shrug in response, eventhough he knows that Harry is probably in his pyjamas in his flat writing down lyrics about unrequited love.

Liam surprisingly doesn’t have any dates that week either, and he’s also suspiciously not at the pub. Niall finds out from Harry that Liam’s been keeping him company, bringing him out for dinner and trying to cheer him up. He watches as Harry talks excitedly about how he and Liam had a Disney movie marathon and spent an hour arguing over which was the best Toy Story movie. It seems like Harry’s not too broken up from moving on from his unrequited love, and Niall’s happy to see that.

Friday comes round and The Pingu Brothers are due to play and Harry can’t avoid the pub any longer. He walks in later than he usually does, Liam following behind him with a supportive hand on his shoulder.

“I’m fine. Stop looking at me as if I’m going through a divorce or something.” Harry snaps at Liam when they take their seats at the bar.

Liam drops his hand immediately, looking foolish as he does so. Harry seems to hate the loss of contact though, and he silently nudges Liam with his shoulder as if to let him know that he didn’t mean to snap earlier.

Niall notices that this is the way the two of them get sometimes. They’re closer with each other than with the rest of them, and it’s always like they’re in their own little world when they get together and chat.

“Harry look, I know you’re mad at me for some reason. Can we just talk for a sec?” Louis pops up out of nowhere. He’d come into the pub early, and Niall knew he was waiting for Harry and he didn’t waste any more time in coming over to them to talk to him.

Liam looks on with worry and Niall can see how he’s controlling himself to not reach out and grab Harry’s hand. But Harry just nods at him and follows Louis outside, turning to look back at Liam and Niall, shrugging as he goes along.

Liam just sits there staring at his drink and Niall has to ask him if he’s okay.

“Nah, it’s just…he was starting to get over Louis you know. Just afraid that this will set him back or something.”

Niall agrees with Liam, and hopes that Louis is just apologising and not fucking up Harry’s feelings again.

The two of them come back half an hour later, Louis squeezing Harry’s shoulders with a wink before joining his friends on the other side of the bar.

Harry walks up to them and there’s something odd about his face, like he’s just seen a ghost or something unbelievable. Josh comes over to Niall while to take some ice, dropping an ice cube into a glass as he nods in Harry’s direction. “What’s up with him?”

“Lou…he kissed me.” It’s the first thing Harry says, and Niall, Josh, and Liam all look at him in shock. “He said that he knows I like him…”

“What does that mean?” Liam asks through gritted teeth.

“I…I don’t know? He said he was going to break things off with Eleanor soon and…and yeah…”

“Does that mean he likes you too?”

Harry just shrugs, and Niall wants to tell him that it’s a bad idea, and he knows Liam wants to too from the way his shoulders are tense and he looks at their friend worryingly. But the problem is that Harry’s now got this dreamy look on his face with his lips pulled up into the smallest of smiles and Niall doesn’t have the heart to break it to him.

* * *

Niall’s just come back from his five minute break when he sees a commotion going on right outside the toilet. He’s about to leave it to the bouncers to deal with it, figuring it’s just a bunch of drunk guys trying to act all macho, when he spots Liam in the middle of the mess of people and it takes him another moment to realise that Harry is holding him back.

He quickly runs over there, and when he gets closer he sees Louis standing opposite them, held back by one of the bouncers and holding up his nose. The bouncers have already separated the boys, and Niall is too confused to process what’s happened, and just exchanges looks between the two of them.

He just grabs onto Liam, who’s holding his hand close to his chest, and leads him away to the break room at the back of the pub. He sits him down on the sofa before going out to get a bag of ice for Liam’s hand.

“What the fuck happened Liam?” He asks when he comes back.

He’s breathing heavily and Niall has never seen Liam look so fierce in his life. He’s built strong, but he’s always gentle and soft-spoken, and Niall knows he doesn’t have a bad bone in his body. Which makes it all the more dumbfounding to figure out what riled up Liam so bad that it got him to punch someone, punch Louis in fact.

“I went to the loo and – he was pressed against the wall with his hand down some bloke’s pants.” Niall sees Liam clench his hand into a fist until his knuckles are white and he’s afraid for a moment that Liam’s going to punch the wall or something.

“Who the fuck does he think he is?” Liam spits out. “He told Harry he liked him and what – 5 minutes later he’s sucking face with someone else! I got so – I got so mad cause Harry – Harry doesn’t deserve that.”

“He just…” He lets out a sigh, rubbing his uninjured hand over his face and through his hair and his whole body just slouches as the tension seeps out. “He looked so happy after Louis kissed him. It’s what he wanted all this time yeah? All I could think about was how hurt he’d be when he found out and…I just saw red.”

“You like him don’t you?”

Liam looks up at Niall in shock, already shaking his head, but Niall can see it in his eyes that he’s lying. He gives him a moment before he speaks again.

“Why didn’t you ever tell him?” Niall asks, as he takes a seat next to him on the sofa.

“I don’t know. I’ve been attracted to him from the moment I met him. But he was into Louis so…” Liam doesn’t finish, just shrugs his shoulders instead while he holds his head in his hands. Niall doesn’t ask anything else, not wanting to push him anymore because he got it, there was nothing else to say.

Niall leaves Liam in the break room to give him some space and let him compose himself. Josh meets his eye when he joins him back behind the bar and the two of them just look at each other in disbelief.

“Well I didn’t think the night was going to end up like this.” Niall agrees with him and then one of the bouncers come over and tells them that Harry brought Louis over to the hospital in a taxi. Niall’s a little angry at Harry would choose his side over Liam’s, but has to remind himself that he probably doesn’t know the full story.

Niall gets off early a little after midnight to swing by the hospital on his way home. Liam left 20 minutes after the fight, looking more calmed down though he just kept his face down as he walked out the pub.

The nurse in the Emergency area directs him to a room and he finds Louis sitting up on a stretcher with some ice wrapped in a thick cloth pressed against his nose.

The first thing he asks is where Harry is, and Louis tells him that he left soon after they came to the hospital, which is some sort of relief to Niall.

“It’s not broken…just going to be a little sore for a while.” Niall just nods, and standing in front of Louis, he realises he feels a lot more angry at him than he thought he’d be.

“You look disappointed.”

“You think?” Niall scoffs sarcastically.

“I don’t…I don’t know why I did that Niall.” At least Louis had the decency to look ashamed and was avoiding Niall’s eyes.

“Look Lou, I know I’m in no place to tell you how to live your life. But you’ve got to stop whatever shit you’re doing mate. Because it’s not just about you anymore. It’s about your fiancé. And it’s about Harry. But most importantly it’s about that baby that’s about to come into this world and look up to you for the rest of your life.” Niall finally lets it all out, he’s never lost his cool at one of the boys before, and he hates that when he does it’s over something like this.

“You can pretend all you want, stay in denial for all I care. But you’ve got to remember that you’re responsible for someone. You need to man up Lou.”

“I know.” Louis finally looks at him and replies in a serious tone and Niall really hopes that he does get it. 

He tells Louis to take care of himself and turns to leave but just before he walks out, he hears Louis calling out to him. “Niall…thanks…for dropping by. And…I’m sorry.”

“It’s not me you’ve got to say sorry to mate.” Niall adds, though he does appreciate the sincerity in Louis’s voice.

Niall’s almost out the door when he stumbles into someone. He looks up to say sorry and is surprised when his blue eyes meet a familiar hazel, he’d know those eyes anywhere.

“Zayn…” Niall’s heart leaps out of his chest when he takes in his appearance. He’s dressed nice in a blue and white plaid shirt and dark blue jeans, his hair slicked back in a stylish quiff and suddenly Niall’s feeling conscious in his black shirt that probably smells like beer and his ratty old jeans that are almost ripping at the seams.

Niall gets his hopes up a little when he notices that Zayn’s face light up when he sees him, though he quickly brushes it off as his imagination. It’s only for a few seconds, because then his face turns a little serious, and he’s looking at Niall with such an intense gaze that it leaves Niall feeling a little confused.

Zayn shakes his head after a while, and gives him a little smile. “I saw them getting into a taxi just as I was walking up. Jumped in and came here with them.” That explains what he was doing here when Niall didn’t remember seeing him at the pub.

“Heading home?” Niall nods and Zayn offers to walk him out of the hospital. They walk in silence along the corridor before they reach outside. Zayn stops to light up a cigarette, offering one to Niall who shakes his head.

“You catching a taxi?”

Niall shakes his head again. “My flat’s nearby so I’ll probably walk it.”

“I’ll walk you there.” Niall almost stumbles over his feet at the thought and feels his nerves starting to build up in his stomach.

“No, Zayn, you don’t have to. You probably have to get back to Louis right?”

“Nah, he’s a big boy. He can take care of himself.”

“And I can’t?” Niall tries to joke.

Zayn laughs, the kind of laugh that warms Niall up from top to toe on this chilly night. “I don’t know, can you?”

Niall’s thankful that it’s midnight and the streetlights aren’t too bright because he’d die if Zayn could see the way he was blushing so hard now. He doesn’t say anything, and thankfully Zayn speaks up before he can. “Anyway, I fancy a bit of a walk too. I can just catch a taxi from yours.”

Niall doesn’t trust himself to say anything so he just nods and starts walking in the direction of his flat.

“Heard what you told Louis.” Zayn says after they’ve been walking in a comfortable silence for a little while. Niall quickly looks down, feeling the heat rush to his cheeks as he stuffs his fingers into his pockets. “No, you did the right thing. God knows he deserves it.”

Niall shrugs. “I just think it’s not fair to fuck around with someone’s feelings like that. I didn’t even do it for Harry, it’s just…I’ve known Louis for a few months now and I can see that under that happy façade that he’s actually not. And that sucks you know? He deserves to find out what he wants. But he can’t drag everyone else down while he finds out by trial and error.”

Zayn lets out a quiet chuckle, and it’s like a gush of warm air that travels all the way from Niall’s toes up to his fingertips. Niall turns his head a little to look at Zayn’s profile and he can see the way his lashes kiss his cheek each time he sucks in the smoke from his cigarette. The streetlights add a warm glow to his face and Niall can see the outline of his jaw clearly and he wonders how that 2-day stubble would feel under his fingers. He almost reaches out to touch, but then Zayn’s eyes turn to lock with his and he stumbles, quickly drawing back his finger.

“And what about you? What do you want?”

Niall can’t find his voice but he wants to say you. I want you.

But he doesn’t, so instead he just gives Zayn a nervous laugh and clears his throat awkwardly, looking down at his feet before he looks back up to see Zayn’s looking at him curiously.

He sees a taxi driving by and quickly hails it, considering his flat is just a few minutes away now.

“Bored of me so quickly?” Zayn teases.

Niall just shakes his head. “My flat’s literally over there. It’s hard enough to catch a taxi at this time.”

Zayn throws his cigarette down and stubs it with his shoe, looking up at Niall and casually glancing at his lips.

“I know. This conversation isn’t over though.” He says as he gets into the taxi.

“G’night Zayn.”

Zayn looks at him for a few seconds, and he opens his mouth to say something then snaps it shut, nodding instead before closing the door.

That night Niall falls asleep wondering how Zayn’s lips would feel against his, and a steady chant of I want you, I want you, I want you

* * *

The next morning, Niall wakes up and registers someone curled up next to him. He knows without turning that it’s Harry, can feel his curly hair tickling his neck, and for a minute regrets that he gave him an extra set of keys to his flat. But then he remembers the night before and feels relieved that Harry’s here, and he’s anxious to know his side of things on last night’s events.

“How are you?” Niall mumbles into the pillow. Harry just hums in response and Niall would think he’d fallen asleep but he can still feel him tapping his finger against the side of the bed.

“Couldn’t sleep all night.”

Niall slowly opens his eyes and rolls over to face Harry. He just keeps quiet, decides to let Harry tell him in his own time closes his eyes.

It’s a few minutes later when Harry lets out a deep breath and speaks. “I’m not…I’m not upset about it. I think I’m just a little…disappointed?”

Niall opens his eyes and finds Harry staring blankly up at the ceiling.

“He told me he was going to break the engagement…and then he just kissed me. At first it was good, cause I thought…it’s finally happening. But...it was like this drunken slap of lips against mine in a dark alley that smelt like piss. And all I could think about was the fact that I’d helped him pick out the flowers for his wedding last week.” He shakes his head at the memory and rubs his fingers over his eyes.

“I thought you came back in looking happy though?”

“I think…I think because I could finally see what an idiot I was. I didn’t feel anything, and it was a little confusing because the more I thought about it the more I felt relieved. Like he finally kissed me but…it wasn’t what I wanted anymore.” Niall’s happy to hear that, and he tells Harry that.

“I didn’t even know why Liam punched him until I got to the hospital and asked him about it…and yeah I was a little mad but…I wasn’t surprised. It’s like… I think I don’t care?” He pauses. “I think I haven’t really cared for a long time...I just didn’t realise it.”

Harry turns and looks at him, cracking a wide grin and Niall can’t help but to return the smile.

“So did you talk to Liam?” Niall asks later while they’re having breakfast.

“I tried calling him but he’s not picking up or answering my texts.” He looks at Niall like he wants to say something but is having an internal battle on whether he should.

“Spit it out Styles.”

Harry gives him a little pout before his face changes to something more serious. “I just…I was more upset about Liam. I felt so bad…I didn’t realise he’d get so mad about it.”

“He’s a good guy Liam…cares a lot about you.”

“I know…”

Niall doesn’t say any more, but he sees the way Harry’s cheeks flush and the tries to hide his smile behind his cup of tea.

* * *

They don’t see Liam for a couple of days, but when they do – he’s back at the bar on another date.

He brings in this tall girl with long brunette hair and thick pouty lips and settles her in one of the booths before making his way to the bar looking a little sheepish.

“Well well well, look what the cat dragged in Niall.” Josh teases when Liam comes up to the bar.

Niall can see the blush on his face and it’s so endearing that he can’t imagine that this is the same person who was practically seething and shaking from anger just a week ago. “Sorry guys, was a little embarrassed. I don’t usually – I’ve never really been in a bar fight before.”

“Liam!” Harry exclaims when he spots him from the stage. He quickly gets off, much to the dismay of Ed, and practically runs to the bar and jumps on Liam, who’s sporting a permanent blush.

“Hiya Haz…”

Harry looks fondly at him and asks him why he’s been MIA.

“Sorry mate. Been a little busy. Got a date tonight though. Actually, I should probably get back to her.” Liam grabs his two drinks and walks back to the booth. It’s a little weird, normally he stays and talks to them a little longer, and when Niall looks at Harry, he’s got his face in a frown.

“What’s wrong Haz?”

“That girl…he’s gone on a date with her before.”

“What do you mean?”

“I remember – he really liked her and wouldn’t stop talking about her for weeks. Then she got a job offer somewhere else and they never got a chance to go out again.”

“Guess she’s back in town again.” Josh says, while wiping down a few glasses.

“He’s never been on a second date before.”

“Is that a problem?”

“Maybe he’s finally met his match…” Harry says and Niall’s a little surprised to hear a sad tone in his voice. He looks on as Harry slowly makes his way back to the stage and starts his set with Ed, though his face is set in a frown the entire time.  

Liam’s date ends fairly quickly though, something about his date having an early meeting the next day, and after coming by the bar and chatting to Niall for a bit, he went to find a spot near the stage and watched the band. Niall didn’t miss how quickly the smile returned to Harry’s face.

Zayn comes in at his usual time, a little after 10pm. He’s wearing a simple outfit, jacket, shirt and jeans, but Niall can’t help thinking he’s still the most gorgeous man in the whole pub.

“Hey.” Zayn says as he takes a seat in front of Niall. He turns his head to look around the pub and notices Liam and looks a bit surprised. “Liam’s here?”

“Yeah he had a date earlier. Tall brunette chick. She left though.”

Zayn looks a little surprised. “You know, to be honest I always thought that Harry was into Liam.”

Niall looks at him confused, because to him he always thought it was just a brotherly affection between the two of them. But then he looks to where Harry and Liam are standing to the side of the stage, talking animatedly with each other and he realises that Liam’s been plastered to Harry’s side the whole time. It’s then he notices that the fond look on Liam’s face is mirrored on Harry’s…and he can’t believe he didn’t see it earlier.

He grabs onto Zayn’s arm as he comes to the realisation. “Oh my god Zayn…” He turns to him and gets a huge grin in response, and that’s when he realises that he’s actually touching Zayn. He snaps his hand back as if burned by fire, and tries to ignore the way Zayn’s face falls a little.

“You can see it too right?” Niall nods and Zayn looks at him confused because Niall’s looking at Liam and Harry with a weird smile on his face and a mischievous look in his eyes. “What are you gonna do?”

“Just wait and see.” Niall’s in such a good mood because he’s got a plan forming in his head and so maybe that accounts for the rush of confidence he gets because a few seconds later he gives Zayn a little wink and is rewarded by seeing a blush make its way to the other lad’s cheeks.

Niall forces the butterflies down his stomach, and quickly walks away before he can break this spell and say something stupid, though he and Zayn keep exchanging glances and secret smiles at each other for the rest of the night.

* * *

“Do you like Liam?” Harry had followed Niall back to his flat last night the next morning Niall didn’t wait long before dropping the question to him during brunch.

“Duh.”

“I mean, like him Haz.”

Harry looks at Niall dumbfounded. “I- I don’t know.” Niall raises an eyebrow at him, and gives him a little encouraging smile. Harry just stares at him with wide eyes, as if it was the first time he’d actually said it out loud. “I…I don’t know when it happened Niall. He’s always been good to me…but then there was Louis and then Liam and his dates and-“

 “You two are a bunch of idiots.”

Harry pouts at Niall but he just shakes his head. He’s definitely going to do something about it.

* * *

“Niall, I’m…I’m not sure about this.”

“Liam, relax, trust me.”

“Who is this person anyway?”

“You’ll see.”

Liam gives him an annoyed look before going off to the toilet.

Niall’s getting a little nervous when he thinks that maybe things won’t actually go to plan. Zayn appears at that moment and he feels a little relieved when he sees him. Ever since Harry confessed that he might have feelings for Liam too, Niall took it upon himself to play matchmaker. Niall’s been planning this over the past few days, and he’s talked about it with Zayn a lot as well.

“What if it doesn’t work? Then I’d ruin their friendship as well. Fuck I’d ruin all of our friendships. Fuck I didn’t think this through.”

Zayn grabs onto his hand to stop the way he’s flailing it around wildly. “Stop. It’s going to work out just fine.”

Niall can feel Zayn’s thumb rubbing against the inside of his wrist and it does calm him down, and he struggles to fight the heat creeping across his cheeks.

“Is he here yet? Or is it a she? Shit, Niall most people tell me a little bit more about the blind date they’re setting me up on.” They’re interrupted by Liam and Zayn lets go of Niall’s hand and he isn’t sure whether to be thankful or disappointed.

“Hi Liam.” Everyone turns to see Harry standing behind them and Niall looks especially proud. He’s scrubbed up pretty nice and looks like he’s made an effort into what he’s wearing. His hair doesn’t look messy and isn’t hidden under a fedora or wrapped in a bandana. It looks like he’s actually washed and blow-dried it, because his curly hair now falls soft and wavy against his face. He’s wearing a nice shirt underneath a blazer, though he’s still got on that pair of skin tight jeans.

“Hey Haz, you’re looking nice today.” Liam looks at Harry in awe and it only makes the grin on Harry’s face bigger.

“Thanks, you’re not too bad yourself. So shall we go find a table?”

“Oh sorry Haz, Niall’s set me up on another blind date, just waiting for whoever it is to show up.”

“I know. Well he’s shown up and now he’s asking whether you want to sit somewhere a little more private so that these goons won’t be spying on us?”

Liam just stares at Harry in shock and quickly turns to look at Niall.

“Is this some kind of joke?!” Niall just stares back at him and shrugs before Harry groans and pulls him towards one of the booths. “Just come on Liam, I’m trying to be suave here.” Harry whines as they walk away.

Niall and Zayn chuckle as they watch the two of them and they really do disappear into a corner that Niall can’t see.

“You’re going to have to go check up on them.”

“Yes Mr Matchmaker.” Niall swats at Zayn’s arm playfully before he moves away to serve some drinks and tries to hide his blush when Zayn throws a wink his way.

They’ve really gotten closer over the past few days and Niall’s been getting an inkling that maybe, just maybe, Zayn could be feeling the same as Niall does. He’s been pushing it down to avoid getting his hopes high, but tonight, the way Zayn’s looking at him, Niall feels like he’s ready to take the next step.

Niall gets busy for the next hour and barely has time to see what Harry and Liam are up to, but Zayn’s always present to give him updates every now and then. When he finally catches a break, he’s happy to see Liam and Harry sitting along with Zayn, and Harry’s grinning from ear to ear and Liam looks like he’s genuinely enjoying himself in a date for the first time in a long time.

“So how’s it going?” He asks them when he joins them on that side of the bar.

“Yeah, it’s…it’s good.” Liam says while beaming at Harry. “Think we’re gonna head out, grab something to eat actually.”

“Oh is that what the kids are calling it these days?” Zayn teases and Harry shakes his head at them before pulling Liam away.

“Looks like it worked out eh? Zayn says once they’re gone. “Why were you so intent on getting them together anyway?”

Niall just shrugs, taking a minute to think before replying. “It’s just…they deserve to be happy. And the more I thought about it, the more I think they’re perfect for each other. And if they need a little push in that direction, I’m willing to do it. I just want them to be happy.”

Zayn doesn’t say anything to that, and after a while when Niall looks at him, he finds the other lad already looking at him with the same intense look that Niall can’t read into.

“You’re amazing Niall.”

Zayn’s says it with such sincerity and he’s looking at Niall so seriously and he has to tear his eyes away from Zayn’s gaze, because his voice is caught in his throat and if he didn’t he’d probably be staring into them forever.

He doesn’t get a chance to try to tell Zayn about his feelings that night, but he tells himself soon.

* * *

 “We’re taking it slow. Which means no sleepovers.”

Harry and Liam have been dating for a few weeks now and he’s been filling in Niall on everything over lunch.

Harry’s phone buzzes and he picks it up to see who it is. Niall expects it to be Liam but he watches as Harry’s eyes widen in surprise and he stops chewing on his food.

“Who is it? Liam sent you a dick pick?”

“It’s Louis.” Harry pauses. “He wants to talk.”

It’s been about a month since they’ve seen him and Niall’s surprised, and frankly a little worried that this could be a bad thing that he’s contacting Harry. “Do you wanna?”

Harry shrugs. “I really care anymore yeah? But…I’m curious to know what he has to say.”

Niall sits in silence as Harry types away on his phone, not saying a word to him eventhough Niall’s itching to ask him what he’s planning to do.

He finally sets the phone down about 10 minutes later. “I’m meeting him at the bar pub. Told Liam about it too.”

“What did he say?”

“He said okay but I think it was the okay-but-I’m-really-not.” Harry goes back to eating and he must sense that Niall wants to say something because he continues, “I really…I really don’t care Niall. Liam’s good for me. He’s the best really.” And then he starts blushing and Niall throws his napkin at him in disgust.

“You guys sicken me!”

Harry sticks his tongue out at Niall but then keeps smiling for the rest of the lunch and Niall can’t help it when he finds himself doing that too.

Niall sees Louis first when he walks into the pub later that evening and nods in greeting. “Hey Lou, how’s it going?”

“I’m...really good actually.” He reaches into his pocket for his phone and takes it out, scrolling through it before he sees something that lights up his face. “Meet Emma.”

“Oh shit mate, congratulations!” Niall didn’t realise the baby was due so soon, and while it explains why Louis has been missing, Niall also hopes it means he’s gotten his shit together.

Louis must read the apprehensive look on his face, because he smiles sheepishly at him. “I…I took your advice mate.”

Niall looks confused for a while before he remembers the night of the fight and what he said to Louis in the hospital.

“Really?”

“Yeah. I- I broke off the engagement with Eleanor and…I moved out. She was pretty understanding about it actually. Mad pissed at me for a while but then…I think she knew the relationship had been dead for a long time already. Then Emma was born and she forgave me, thank God, because I’m in love with this little munchkin and…I just wanna be a good father to her.”

“I’m really happy you figured it out Lou, and I’m sure you’ll be the best father.”

Just then they see Harry walking in with his guitar and Louis looks at him guiltily. “Think I’ve got some apologies to make.” He says before setting out towards where Harry’s standing by the stage and gestures for them to talk in a corner. He’s tempted to watch them, but decides to give them some privacy and busies himself behind the bar.

Liam walks in 15 minutes later and the two of them are still talking, and Niall can see the way Liam tenses up when he sees Louis and Harry laughing with each other.

“It’s nothing mate, Lou just wanted to apologise.” Liam gives him a weak smile in return, but Niall can still see the insecurity in his eyes.

Just then Harry comes over and throws his hands over Liam, nuzzling his head into his boyfriend’s neck. Liam’s face breaks into a huge grin as he turns his head to meet Harry’s and gives him a quick kiss.

“I spoke to Lou.” Liam clenches his jaw tight and his shoulders go tense again but he still keeps a strained smile on his face. Harry notices and noses along Liam’s jaw. “It’s fine Li. He apologised and…he’s got a baby girl! And that’s all he’s focussing on right now.”

Liam looks at Niall in surprise and he just nods back to confirm it. “I told him about us. He’s scared you’re going to kick his ass again so I’m going to call him over and you’re going to be nice to him okay?”

Even Liam can’t stay mad at Louis for long and when Harry beckons him over, the first thing he does is apologise to him for punching him in the face before congratulating him on his baby. Niall’s ecstatic with the way things have worked out, and as he watches over the three of them talking, Josh joins him. “You look like a proud mum.”

Niall chuckles quietly and then he adds, “Yeah, I am.”

Niall doesn’t get a chance to catch up with all of them for long as the crowd gets bigger and the pub starts filling up. He still checks his watch when it’s nearly 10 out of habit, but he doesn’t make a move go straighten up. He isn’t expecting Zayn tonight because he mentioned the last time that he was busy at the studio, and he hasn’t come in for a few weeks.

So it’s a bit of a surprise when he sees Zayn walking towards him a few minutes later, his face clean shaven and his hair slicked back, his leather jacket hanging over his shoulders as usual. He nods at Josh before making his way to Niall’s end of the counter, his face breaking into a wide grin when he sees him, tongue pressed against his teeth and his eyes all crinkled up around the edges.

“Zayn…it’s been a while.” Niall can’t help the way he’s probably grinning like an idiot, but he’s just really happy to see him.

“Yeah I know mate. Can’t keep away from this place for too long.” Zayn says before looking at him a little oddly.

“Your hair’s flat today.”

Niall sheepishly runs his fingers through the top, a bit annoyed with himself for not trying to make an effort at least.

“No, I like it.” Zayn quickly says, and flashes that heartwarming smile at him again.

“So where did you disappear to?”

“I sold up most of my paintings, I don’t know if I told you but I was selling them at a local market?”

Yeah you did, in fact I’ve got one of them at home.

Of course he can’t bring himself to admit that.

“Anyway, someone saw them and asked me to do a couple more and I had to work on it quickly. I’ve pretty much been holed up in my studio working on that. Was getting a little bored, so I thought I’d come check what I’ve been missing.”

“Well, aside from Harry and Liam being sickeningly in love, nothing much.”

Zayn laughs and Niall gets a little wistful when he thinks how he’s missed seeing this sight in front of him. After Niall fixes up his drink, Zayn takes it and joins the rest of the boys at the table they’re seated at.

It hits Niall then, and he’s suddenly overcome with this sudden urge to tell Zayn how he feels tonight. Maybe it’s seeing all his friends settled and happy, but Niall’s yearning for that and he hopes Zayn wants it too.

All he can think about is what Zayn’s asked him that night. What do you want?

He thinks he’s ready to answer that question.

* * *

It’s just his luck that they’re swamped at the bar and Niall finds himself and Josh working nonstop serving drinks, then wiping up whatever spills and attending to everyone. There are two separate large groups that have come in and it’s all messy and a little rowdy that he completely forgets about Zayn.

So it’s a nice surprise when Zayn comes to find him when there’s less people at the bar, offering a sympathetic smile as he watches Niall working. It still takes about 10 minutes until Niall’s able to serve him, and he quickly mumbles an apology for taking so long.

“No I didn’t want anything. Just thought I’d come see how you were holding up.”

Niall wishes he wasn’t so fair because the amount of times Zayn has made him blush today is going to blow his cover.

“You just wanted to get away from that lovesick couple didn’t you?” Niall teases.

“Or maybe I just wanted to hang out with you?”

Niall gives him a grateful smile, and-

He gets that feeling again, that rush of adrenaline coursing through his veins and he can feel the energy thrumming through his bones and it’s now or never, there’s no better time for him to ask Zayn out than now or else he’ll never get the courage again-

Before he can say anything, someone practically stumbles into Zayn’s arms and Niall recognises her as the pretty blonde girl who was talking to Jade in the art stall the other day.

“Zayn! I thought it was you! My girlfriends were eyeing a good looking lad and I told them that was my fit boyfriend.”

Niall almost drops the glass in his hands as he stares at the two of them. Her face is just inches away from Zayn’s and he’s looking at her with such adoration in his face and oh – boyfriend. Of course…he should have known.

He watches as Zayn shakes his head and struggles to hold her up as she goes putty in his arms.

“Babe, you’re right smashed aren’t ya?” He shakes his head at her while she just giggles and then he decides that it’s time for her to go home – actually he says back it’s time to go back to “our”  flat and Niall grips onto the counter a little bit more tighter. Zayn just laughs as he practically carries her out the bar, only turning smile apologetically to him before leaving with that girl in his arms.

Josh comes right next to him and nudges him with his shoulder and gives him a sad smile when he sees the look on his face. He looks away and mumbles that he’ll be right back, before going and locking himself in the toilet.

He grips the sink and stares at his reflection in the mirror.

Zayn Malik has a girlfriend. Zayn Malik doesn’t have feelings for you. Zayn is happy without you.

He takes a deep breath, then returns to work, pretending like nothing happened.

Josh keeps sending looks his way but Niall just ignores them, continues to pour out drinks and serving customers with a tight smile on his face. Harry and Liam comes over just before closing time and say a quick goodbye before the two of them step off into the night hand-in-hand.

Niall tries not to watch with a painful twinge shooting across his chest.

* * *

The next few days pass by in a daze for Niall. He still goes to work, but he’s quieter than usual, and Josh knows better than to bring it up. When he does, Niall just puts on a forced smile and tells him not to worry, that it isn’t a big deal.

He tries telling himself that too in the hopes that he’ll believe it eventually. It’s not like they had anything anyway, and who was he to get mad at Zayn for having a girlfriend who was gorgeous and was all artsy and obviously the perfect match for him?

It's fine whenever he comes back home every night, too knackered that he falls asleep immediately the minute his face touches his pillow. It's only a problem in the morning when he wakes up, because the first thing he sees is that painting on the wall, can see the small zm etched in the corner, and all he can think about is the mornings he's woken up to it before and imagined having Zayn next to him describing each detail into his ear.

Harry doesn't notice the change in his attitude at all because he's too busy in the honeymoon phase of his relationship with Liam, and besides Niall doesn't feel like talking about it with him either, because what's there to say?

But by the end of the week, he finds himself grumpier than normal and he’s snapping at everyone. He even tells Louis to stop shoving his phone in his face every five minutes to show pictures of Emma a little too harshly and he’s almost physically sick watching Liam and Harry being disgustingly in love.

He feels guilty and hates that he’s feeling so cynical about everything because this isn't him, he's the laidback one, the carefree lad who wants to make everyone else smile. But he can't bring himself to do that, because he can't stop feeling like his heart's been smashed into a dozen pieces. 

* * *

He gets up one morning to his phone ringing and knows without looking at the screen that it’s his mum because he hasn’t called her in the past few weeks.

“Hello love, how are you?”

“Fine ma. You?”

She starts talking about her life and things she’s been up to but Niall’s mind wanders off and he doesn’t pay any attention, he doesn’t even try to pretend that he’s listening.

“Niall, are you there? Is everything okay love?”

“Yeah ma, just a bit tired that’s all.”

“You sure?” She must realise something’s up because her voice is filled with concern. “You know…I was thinking, it’s been a long time since you’ve visited. The last time I saw you was – oh 6 months ago when I came up to London for your cousin Katie’s wedding.”

He thinks about it and realises that she’s right, and he’s suddenly overcome with this feeling of nostalgia for Ireland and his hometown and finds himself missing it with a pang in his chest.

He lies in bed for a little while longer after he’s put the phone down and then makes up his mind. He makes a quick call to Paul and talks him into giving him a few weeks off, and is relieved when Paul understands and lets him. He hasn’t taken a day off in the two years he’s worked at the pub, and Paul knows that he wouldn’t be asking now unless he needed it. Even he mentioned that he’s noticed what a right twat Niall’s been over the past few days and needs the break.

He doesn’t think twice about it, just shoves some clothes into a duffle bag and grabs a taxi to the airport and finds the next available flight to Dublin. It’s in two hours, and he spends the whole time fidgeting and wondering if he should text anyone to let them know. He decides to tell Josh and Harry at least, knowing that they’d be pissed as hell if he left without telling them, and texts them quickly to tell them that he’s going home for a bit.

Josh’s reply is immediate. A simple “u ok?” that he doesn’t reply to.

Harry’s reply, or rather replies, come in a string of texts that he doesn’t get to check until he’s in his seat and is about to switch his phone off.

what the hell you’re joking right Niall?

1 missed call from HAZZA

Niall what the hell

2 missed calls from HAZZA

1 missed call from PAYNO

who am I going to talk to about Liam :(((

fine have fun at home love u mate xxx

He smiles as he scrolls through his messages, then switches off his phone, tucking it back into his pocket and looks out the window as he counts down the minutes until he gets back home.

* * *

He doesn’t switch it back on at all, not even when he lands in Dublin Airport and gets a rental to drive down to Mullingar. The closer he gets to the little town he grew up in, the more lighter he feels already.

By the time he’s reached his mum’s house, he’s restless with excitement, already itching to call round a couple of his friends to grab a pint down at their local pub. His mum is obviously excited to see him, and Niall melts into her arms when she gives him a long hug, despite the fact that she’s half his size.

He talks a bit with her, but before long he’s fighting back his yawns and so makes his way to his old bedroom. He flops onto his bed and stares at the ceiling while he contemplates whether or not to take a shower, but it’s already 10 pm and he knows if he takes it now, then he’d be awake and it’d be harder for him to go to sleep.

It’s a weird feeling that he can’t explain, not being in the pub at this time. If he was back in London, he’d be serving the rush of customers their drinks right now. Then he realises no, he’d actually be waiting for Zayn to come round…

He pushes the thought away as quickly as it comes and closes his eyes, remembering that he was here to forget all about the boy with the hazel eyes who smells like leather and turpentine.

It doesn’t stop him from dreaming about him though.

* * *

It’s not until a week later when he switches his phone back on and it immediately starts going off with a dozen or so notifications.

JOSH: everyone’s asking about you…even zayn

HAZZA: I tried calling you why is your phone offffff

HAZZA: don’t you want to hear about how I did the dirty with liam?

HAZZA: ===============8D

HAZZA: that’s the best way I can describe little payno

JOSH: zayn’s asking when you’re coming back. looked disappointed when I said I dunno. stop being an idiot and come back

HARRY: NIALL COME BAAAAAAAAAAAAACK MISS YOU :((((((

He chuckles as he reads it all, and sends the same text back to the two of them.

NIALL: I’m on holiday shhhhh leave me alone !

He switches it off again, resisting the urge to ask Josh what else Zayn said, deciding that it doesn’t matter anymore.

* * *

The second week rolls around and he’s officially bored. He’s already met up with most of his friends but they’re all busy with their own lives, which he can’t blame them for either since he’d pretty much abandoned them to London and never kept in touch.

His mum casually brings up the topic of meeting one of her friends who owns a restaurant and is looking for a restaurant manager. He doesn’t say anything at first, doesn’t give in to the hints that she makes, but then at the end of the week he thinks why not? and sets up a meeting.

The meeting goes well and he’s even a little intrigued by it afterwards. It’s a great opportunity to be in charge, which is definitely a step up from being a bartended, and it’s something different that he’s willing to try. He tells the owner that he’ll think about it, and it’s something that he actually considers for the rest of his trip.

When it’s pushing three weeks, he can’t stand it anymore. He’s spent a lot of time moping about and feeling sorry for himself and he’s itching to get back to London. He misses the liveliness of the bar, Josh’s pathethic attemps at jokes and even misses teasing Harry about his greasy wild hair. He misses-

No. He shouldn’t be missing him anymore.

* * *

Niall switches his phone back on the morning that he leaves for London. It’s all still the same kind of texts that pop up, mostly Josh cursing at him for taking an extended holiday and leaving him to man the bar with a rookie substitute, and Harry asking him to come back and texting him things about Liam, sometimes oversharing details Niall would really prefer that he didn’t.

The only person he texts is Paul, telling him that he’s back in town and that he can come in for work that night.

it’s about time lad. won’t tell the rest

By the time he reaches the flat, takes a quick shower, changes and gets out the door, he’s going to be late as usual/

The minute Josh sees him walking in through the door, his face breaks out in a wide grin and if Niall reads correctly, he might have even caught a look of relief.

“You’re fucking late you dick.”

“Missed you too Josh.” Niall says before pulling Josh in for a hug.

He’s barely got his arms around him before he gets pounced on by familiar curly-haired lad on his back.

“YOU’RE BACK!!” Harry wraps himself around Niall and practically shouts in his ear. Niall’s happy to see him too and admits that he missed them all a lot.

Niall quickly gets back into his routine of getting the bar ready for opening time and takes his place behind the counter with Josh while Harry and Ed sit on the stools in front of them, everyone catching him up on what he’s missed.

“So how was home then? Surprised your mum didn’t convince you to stay and get a job there.” Josh asks since he’s heard Niall complain about it more often than not.

“Yeah well…” He pauses, wonders if he should tell them about it since he hasn’t really made up his mind yet. “There was this restaurant manager position she kept dropping hints about.”

Josh laughs. “How’d you handle that then?”

Niall waits a beat before replying. “Well I just checked it out…had a talk with the owner.”

Everyone stays silent and Niall tries to avoid looking at any of their faces and busies himself with wiping down a couple of glasses.

“And?” Harry breaks the silence, his voice coming out quiet.

“Nothing…I told him I’ll think about it.”

Niall is saved by Paul telling them it’s time to open up the doors. They all still look at him worriedly, but don’t push, and instead shift on their feet to get the night started.

When the pub officially opens and people start trickling in and it gets busy, Niall gets that familiar rush through his bones and he feels better than he has in the last few weeks.

* * *

It’s halfway through the night when Josh comes over to him and nudges him with his hip.

“Heads up.” He jerks his head towards the doors and Niall follows his gaze to see Zayn walking in.

He still feels his heart beat a little faster when he sees him, looking good as usual in his leather jacket. But his heart drops when he sees his arms around the blonde girl from that night, and he has to remind himself that it shouldn’t matter.

“It’s only the second time she’s here with him.” Josh says before walking away and Niall just nods, trying his best to stop his hands from fidgeting.

Josh helps by throwing every drink request his way and he busies himself serving each one as quick as he can. It helps him forget, but before long Zayn finds out that he’s back and beelines straight for the bar.

“Niall! Mate, where have you been?”

Niall doesn’t know what else to do but return his smile, because even after everything, he really is happy to see Zayn.

“Yeah, just wanted to be back home for a bit.”

Zayn’s face softens a little. “Well hope everything was okay?”

“Yeah, it was good, really good.” The blonde girl shouts his name and is calling him over to their table and Zayn turns his head and impatiently asks her to wait a bit, but Niall decides to save him the trouble. “Anyway, I better get back to work. Talk to you later yeah?” He walks away before Zayn gets a chance to reply, doesn’t even turn to look at him.

He doesn’t get relief for long though. It’s a Sunday, so most of the patrons leave early since it’s a working day the next morning. The gang – Liam, Harry, Ed, Louis, Zayn, and his friend – group sit by the bar as Niall and Josh prepare for closing time.

When Louis sees Niall again he gives him a tight hug and he looks better since the last time Niall saw him. He says he’s really working through his issues and while he hasn’t come out yet – he’s only officially told Niall – he feels more comfortable with himself. He shyly shows Niall new pictures of Emma, and Niall apologies again for his harsh attitude the last time Louis tried to share them with him.

Zayn introduces the blonde girl – Perrie – to him, but doesn’t label her as anything. Niall’s still trying to avoid talking to him, and it seems like Zayn notices because he watches him with a wary look.

Jade comes by the bar to say bye to them since she gets off earlier than Niall and Josh and she hadn’t gotten a chance to see Niall since he came back. She stops in her tracks when she sees Perrie, and it’s only when her eyes widen in horror that it clicks in Niall’s head that Perrie was at the art stall when Jade was buying the painting and would probably recognise her.

He quickly shuffles to stand between Jade and Perrie’s sight but it’s too late. “Oh hello! I remember you! You came to the market and bought one of Zayn’s paintings a few weeks ago didn’t you?”

Zayn turns and looks at Jade in surprise. “Jade, is that true? Why didn’t you tell me? Did you hate it?” Zayn says with a laugh.

“No, she said she was buying it for someone else. Said he was a huge fan of your stuff. He was someone from work wasn’t he? Oh do you work here? Is he here right now? Zayn can meet him!”

Zayn looks confused and Jade looks like a deer caught in the headlights. Niall wishes the ground would open up and swallow him because he has absolutely no idea how they’re going to get out of this one.

“Someone from the pub wanted to buy my art? Who was it?” Zayn asks slowly.

Jade just looks from Niall to Perrie to Zayn and she just smiles and mumbles something about having to leave to catch the last bus home and leaves as quick as she can, leaving the two of them looking more confused than ever.

He hears Perrie saying “how odd” and wishes he could defend Jade but can’t find his voice. Harry and Josh are looking at Niall expectantly, with Harry raising his eyebrows and mouthing tell him.

It’s just his luck that Zayn chooses that moment to look at Harry and catches him, and he follows Harry’s gaze to look at Niall, and it’s excruciating to watch the exact moment Zayn connects the dots.

There’s a flash of different emotions that passes over his face, from confusion to surprise and then there’s that intense gaze he uses to look at Niall. Niall’s cheeks are hot from the embarrassment, and since the ground hasn’t opened up, he mumbles quickly about getting something from the backroom and makes a hasty exit.

* * *

He takes the backdoor exit to step outside, but grabs a packet of cigarettes that he knows Josh keeps in his backpack before he does. He doesn’t smoke usually, but he just wants to do something to distract himself from going crazy when he thinks about how Zayn had to find out about his feelings in the worst situation possible and that too in front of his girlfriend.

There’s no doubt in his mind that Zayn knows how he feels now.

After a while he hears someone behind him and assumes that it’s either Josh or Harry coming to check up on him.

“I thought you didn’t smoke.” Niall spins in his heel and is surprised to find that it’s Zayn standing behind him. He just shrugs in response, still unable to find his voice, and shoves his free hand in his pocket to stop it from fidgeting, and keeps his gaze down as he flicks the ash from his cigarette.

Zayn takes a step closer to him while Niall takes one back without even realising. Zayn looks like he’s a little hurt by that, and Niall wishes he could wipe that look off his face, but isn’t sure if he wants to.

“Why didn’t you tell me you bought my painting?”

Niall doesn’t say anything, still can’t find any words, but the more he keeps quiet the more he realises that Zayn isn’t going to go anywhere until Niall answers him.

“I was embarrassed.” He finally spits out, though it’s probably the stupidest answer. But he couldn’t think of anything else besides because I like you.

Zayn still looks confused, but surprisingly he doesn’t ask Niall why he felt that way.

“It cost a lot of money. It’s one of my more expensive pieces.”

“It was good Zayn, real good. I know you’re really talented and…I just had to have something of yours.” Niall pauses, before he attempts to joke a little. “Before you become a hotshot artist and then I’d really not be able to afford anything.”

Zayn’s face doesn’t change, he doesn’t even crack a smile, instead he takes another step forward and this time Niall doesn’t move.

“Harry says you’re thinking about heading back to Ireland. Got some job lined up there or something.”

Niall laughs, though he thinks it sounds a little empty. “He’s exaggerating. I just had a chat, not even an interview.”

“But you’re thinking about it.” Niall shrugs, looking down at his feet to avoid the way Zayn’s looking at him.

"Maybe. Don't mind a bit of change." It's weak, he knows it is, because he can hear it in the way he sounds uncertain, the way he hesitates, and there's no doubt Zayn hears it too.

"Is that really what you want?" Niall looks up, his whole face burning. Zayn is fixing him with an almost angry look, but his eyes are warm and kind, as if waiting for Niall to tell him something he wants to hear.

“Niall, what do you want?” He asks again. This time there's hope in his voice, and maybe even a plea.

It's the perfect opportunity to tell Zayn the truth. That he wants him, all of him. That he wants to go home to his flat and find Zayn in bed waiting for him, specks of paint drying on his skin. That he wants to see Zayn coming to the bar and instead of thinking about how much he wants him, he wants to think ‘that’s my boyfriend’. But in the end, all that comes out is -

“You.”

His heart almost stops the minute the word slips out of his mouth, because he didn’t even think before he said it, and has no idea where that came from. He slaps his hand over his mouth as if to prevent his heart from pouring out, and his mind is already thinking of ways he could take it back.

Zayn steps closer to him until Niall can feel the other boy’s breath against his. He brings his hand up to gently pry away Niall’s from his mouth, but he doesn’t realise anything because he’s too distracted by the sight of Zayn’s eyes so close to him.  

He doesn’t realise that Zayn’s face is inching closer to him until he can feel the light brush of Zayn’s lips against his, and he jerks his head a little, causing Zayn to miss and press his lips against the corner of Niall’s mouth.

Zayn lets out a little sound in the back of his throat, so before he knows it, Niall turns his head and closes the distance between them again, his lips parting a little as he sucks Zayn’s bottom lip into his mouth, their noses pressing against each other as Niall lifts his hand to graze against Zayn's jaw. It gasps into Zayn's mouth, finally knowing how it feels to touch that stubble that's been driving Niall crazy from the beginning. 

Zayn places his hand on the nape of Niall’s neck, his thumb gently rubbing his skin up and down and it makes Niall feel like he’s floating in air. Zayn tastes like smoke and something sweet, and Niall chases after it until he can’t anymore, until all he can taste is Zayn.

They part after a few minutes, their foreheads still touching as Zayn doesn’t look away from Niall’s lips. Zayn is breathing heavily, and Niall's heart is racing so much he has to cling onto Zayn's shoulders tightly to make sure he doesn't fall to his knees. When he finally calms down a little, he gets struck with the realisation that Zayn isn't available, and it's like he's been doused in cold water. He stumbles out of Zayn's arms and backs up against the wall, trying to keep the distance between the two of them.

“Perrie?” Niall says in a quiet whisper, and it hurts him to say it.

“What about her?” Zayn wants to reach out to him, but he stays still instead after seeing the way Niall's standing defensively.

“She’s…your girlfriend.”

Zayn raises both his arms in confusion and stares at him like he’s a little baffled. “No she’s not?”

“But the other night- she said you were her boyfriend?”

Zayn surprises Niall by bursting into laughter, quickly closing the distance between them and and placing his hands on the wall, bracketing Niall against him. 

“Niall, babe, Pez isn’t my girlfriend. She used to be, a very long time ago, but now she’s just my roommate. She still tells people I’m her boyfriend sometime just to make them jealous.” Zayn says while rolling his eyes.

And oh – well – now Niall feels like an idiot.

“Wait a minute, did you – have you thought she was my girlfriend all this time?”

Niall nods slowly, trying to hide the sheepish look on his face by ducking his head down but Zayn lifts his chin up with his finger.

“Niall, I’ve been gone for you for months now.”

“What?” That, that Niall can’t even begin to wrap around his head. “You – why didn’t you say anything?”

Zayn just shrugs, leaning back in to drop a quick kiss on Niall’s cheek. “Didn’t think you’d be interested.”

“Zayn, you’re amazing, how could I not?”

Zayn smiles before nosing along his jaw and whispering against his lips. “I could say the same about you.” He kisses him again, soft and simple, like a promise that's left unsaid. “From the first time I laid eyes on you at the bar babe, I’ve been hooked. It’s not like you make it easy either, with the way you smile and that warmth that you spread all around you. It’s just - seeing the look on your face when you got Harry and Liam together. It was like you were so worried that they weren’t happy, and it was amazing the way you cared so much to fix everyone else’s lives. And I'd sit there and watch you, laughing that belly laugh of yours, and I'd wonder...if I could ever make you happy like that." 

“Zayn, I – “ Niall starts shaking his head in disbelief and Zayn pulls him closer until their foreheads are touching again. “You do make me happy, Zayn.”

He smiles until his eyes are crinkling at the edges, his eyes looking like a shade of whiskey against the dim streetlights and Niall can feel the warmth under Zayn's hand where it's caressing his cheek.

“We’re such idiots.” Niall says as he buries his head in the crook of Zayn’s neck.

“Guess we’re perfect for each other then yeah?” Zayn replies as he kisses his temple and hugs him tighter.

* * *

Niall glances at his watch and realises that it’s going to hit 10 soon. He quickly slips into the backroom and fixes up his hair, quickly spraying his new cologne – a recent gift – on him before walking back out to the bar.

It’s about five minutes later when a familiar face slides into view, and Niall can’t help the way his face breaks into a wide goofy grin.

“Hello there boyfriend. Could you fix me up a drink please?”

Niall shakes his head as he takes a glass out and fills it up with whiskey, dropping two ice cubes into it before placing it on the counter in front of him.

“Here you go boyfriend.” Niall tries not to blush each time he calls Zayn his boyfriend, but he can’t help it when he thinks that he finally gets to call Zayn his.

Zayn gives him a little wink and tries to play it cool, he says it comes with the leather jacket, though Niall’s gotten to know that Zayn’s actually a big dork. He gives Niall a proper smile, his eyes scrunched up at the edges and his mouth stretched wide as he’s grinning from ear to ear, and his tongue pressed against his teeth in the way that Niall finds adorable.

Zayn doesn’t get to stay by the bar since it’s a busy night, and he slips into the crowd and Niall soon loses sight of him, though he knows he must be off to find Liam and Louis.

But Niall doesn’t mind if he doesn’t get a chance to talk to Zayn again, because he knows at the end of the night, they’ll be going home together hand in hand anyway, and that's enough for him.