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When Darcy told him they were expecting, Steve braced himself for every possibility. He read all the baby books. He kept a list of the food Darcy couldn’t eat. He reminded himself that her mood swings would pass and it wasn’t directed at him. As long as she and the baby were healthy, Steve would do anything to see his girl happy.
The weird food cravings got to him, though. Clint told him to expect these sorts of requests, for things like pickles and ice cream, at all hours of the day. Steve never expected Darcy to ask for Doritos.
“Really?” Steve asked, rolling over in bed to look at her. The clock read 3:03 a.m. “Right now?”
“Yes,” Darcy moaned. She curled up into her pillow, pressing her face into the navy blue fabric. “Go to the convenience store, the one on the corner, and get me the biggest bag of Doritos you can find.”
Sighing, he kissed her forehead as he climbed out of bed. He tugged on his pants from the day before, thankful he hadn’t brought the laundry downstairs yet. Steve didn’t turn on a light, hoping the dark would let her go back to sleep. “Anything else while I’m out?”
“More Doritos. For the baby.”
Steve chuckled. “Got that loud and clear, doll.”
It wasn’t the first time he’d gone on a late night snack run for his pregnant wife. Steve waved to the young guy behind the counter and headed into the aisles. Chips weren’t hard to find, but he hadn’t expected there to be so many different kinds of Doritos.
Nor should there be pictures of the Avengers plastered on every bag.
The Cool Ranch bag showed him in full Captain America gear, shield up and ready to fight. Right now, Steve barely resembled the man on the packaging - his beard was growing in nicely and his hair brushed against his ears. At least the clerk hadn’t recognized him as an Avenger yet.
But there were others: Iron Man on the Nacho Cheese, Bruce in full Hulk rage on the Poppin’ Jalapeño, Thor on the Spicy Sweet Chili.
Someone was having a field day in their PR department. He wondered if Tony was aware of it. Tony would think it was hysterical, buying up stock in Doritos in order to make sure he was the most popular flavor.
Still, Steve had no idea which one Darcy wanted. Doritos weren’t around when Steve was growing up, and he didn’t eat junk food on a regular basis. Darcy introduced him to PopTarts, and he still didn’t understand her fascination with the toaster pastries. Finally he texted his wife in desperation.
[Steve]: Was there a certain flavor I should get??
She never answered. He sighed, grabbed a bag of each flavor, and went to pay.
Darcy waited for him in bed when he returned, bedside light on, pillows behind her back. She flipped through the movie options on Netflix, smiling up at him. “Doritos?” she asked, eyes brightening as she rubbed her stomach.
At five months, Darcy’s bump was starting to show. She loved wearing his shirts to bed, even though they fit her like a tent. She yawned, resting her head against the headboard, but she looked happy. It was early enough that Steve might stay awake and sneak in a morning run before he had to meet up with Sam and the others at the compound. Darcy, on the other hand, probably wouldn’t leave the bed unless Jane made her.
“Doritos,” he confirmed, holding up the plastic shopping bag. “Though you never answered my text about what kind you wanted.”
Her phone was still on the charger, untouched. “There’s only one kind of Doritos,” she said, matter-of-factly.
“The rack at the corner store said otherwise.” Steve pulled out his purchases to show her. “So you have Captain America or Iron Man to choose from. Oh, and I grabbed a bag of Thor and the Big Guy, too.”
“No shit, really?” Darcy let out a squeal and wiggled her fingers for both bags. “Let me see, let me see!”
She tore open the blue bag first. Steve grinned - his girl was Team Cap all the way. “Oh my god, you haven’t looked like this since before the wedding,” she said around a mouthful of chips, looking over the picture on the bag. He’d started growing in the beard at Darcy’s request after they’d gotten married. She liked when he was scruffy, and he liked not being stopped on the street all the time. “Also I’m pretty sure they painted on your abs in this picture.”
He rolled his eyes as he shucked out of his jeans and climbed into bed. “My abs are offended, thank you very much.”
“Hey now. You know how much I appreciate them. The real thing is better than a picture anyway.” Darcy snuggled against his shoulder, the bag of chips between them. “You’re my Dorito.”
“I’ll remember to get you the blue ones next time.”
“Don’t worry, the Iron Man ones aren’t lasting the day either,” she said. “Just that I like the Cool Ranch ones the best.” Darcy took a chip out of the bag and held it up, as if comparing him to the chip. “And you are also shaped like a Dorito.”
“Hey!” He pulled back from her, glaring at the offensive chip in her hand. “I’m your husband!”
Darcy shrugged and popped it into her mouth. “I call ‘em like I see ‘em, Steve.” Another couple chips, and she giggled against him. “Big broad shoulders and a tiny waist. Totally built like a Dorito. I can’t believe you’re on a bag of fuckin’ chips.”
He sighed, wrapping an arm around her shoulders. “Please don’t ever tell Tony that.” He paused, “Or Bucky.”
“Clint?”
“Definitely not. I’ll be having a talk with someone in the Avengers’ PR in the morning.”
“You’re no fun, Steve.”
“Who’s the one who went out at 3 a.m. to get you Doritos?”
“You.” Darcy turned onto her side, a comfortable position for her now that the baby made laying on her back impossible. Steve slid his hand down, rubbing her back. She hung onto the bag of chips like a small child with a teddy bear. He made a note to wash their sheets once Darcy was up for the day. “Love you, Steve. Thank you for my Doritos. Baby thanks you, too.”
Leaning down, he pressed a kiss against her temple. “Like I said when we found out: you take care of the baby, I take care of you.”
“You’re the best of all of us, Steve.”
“So are you. Now get some sleep.”
He put on The Great British Baking Show, knowing that Darcy liked to fall asleep to it. Threading his fingers through her hair, Steve held her until her breathing evened out. Being married to Darcy was the best thing that ever happened to him. They’d tackle parenting the same way they handled Jane’s big science questions or another tough mission as Captain America. He was where he was supposed to be, with the woman he was supposed to be with. The rest would fall into place.
When the baby arrived, four months later, Steve had an entire basket of Doritos sent up to Darcy’s hospital room. She’d craved the flavored corn chips throughout the rest of her pregnancy, going through several bags a week up until she went into labor. While he’d read that some women couldn’t stand to see their cravings after the baby was born, Steve knew it would make Darcy smile.
The moment Steve showed her the basket, Darcy’s face lit up. It didn’t matter that she was tired and a little pale in the wake of childbirth; her smile was radiant and there was nothing Steve loved more. Save, of course, for their daughter, Sarah Jane, who lay snuggled in Darcy’s arms.
She held the baby up to see the basket on her side table. “Look what Daddy brought us,” Darcy cooed. “Doritos for our little Dorito!”
“Oh no.” Steve held his hands up. “We are not calling the baby that.”
Sarah Jane burped.
“See? She likes it!” Darcy grinned, settling back into her bed, Sarah Jane curled on her chest. “Now. I’ve earned me a bag of Captain America Cool Ranch.”
Steve laughed, almost loud enough for the entire hospital to hear. “That’s my girl.”