Chapter Text
prompt: I sent a selfie of myself in the tub to the wrong number
(title from: r.e.m. by ariana grande)
Lizzie Saltzman is no stranger to booty calls.
Wait, she should rephrase that -- it’s not like that. She, herself, hasn’t ever really -- you know, only really having that one time with Raf at the gym and the, well, dozens of times with Sebastian in, um, pretty much everywhere, but -
It’s not like that. She means she understands what those are. She knows how to recognize one -- when Jed once texted her a “u up?” mistakingly (the mistake wasn’t that he’d sent her the text, but that he believed it would actually work) , or that time MG heard one of Kaleb’s many (terrible, awful) advices and actually tried his hand at, well, booty calling (texting?) Lizzie. And also, movies and media and Caroline Forbes is her mom and she never really measures her words when she’s telling her daughters about how the world really works so they’re prepared.
Anyway. That’s what she means when she says she’s no stranger to those. And that’s why she immediately recognizes the most recent text she’s gotten from one Hope Mikaelson for what it is: a booty call.
She frowns, her thumb hovering over the screen as she tries to figure out whether she wants to open the message and look at the picture she’d been sent closely or not -- the thumbnail in the locked screen let her know that Hope was in a bathtub -- and she decides that she might just as well know what she was working with.
There’s not much to the text -- aside from the picture, she guesses -- and Lizzie quickly realizes that this is definitely not meant for her. Not just because Hope Mikaelson has sent her a nude, but because the message paints her a picture that they would have shared a bathtub together, and, as far as Josie’s spell got her to remember, they definitely had never done such a thing.
She pauses, both elated that she’s gotten this opportunity from the youngest Mikaelson herself and extremely uncomfortable that she was put in this situation at all.
Lizzie: Well, what do we have here?
She locks her phone again and sets it face down on the table, trying to school her expression as she looks up at her family and asks her mother for the salt.
It takes a few minutes for her phone to buzz again, and Lizzie was well immersed into the conversation at the table -- Bonnie had discovered this new spell that could help with grey hairs -- when the telltale sign of a new message (followed by another five in a row) from Lizzie’s phone had stopped Josie mid sentence. Three pair of eyes turned to her curiously.
Lizzie licked her lips, her eyes on her twin sister. She smiled encouragingly, “Go on.”
Another buzz.
“Liz, maybe you want to check it? See if everything’s okay?” Josie said, the badly-masked anxiety seeping through her tone. Her dark bambi eyes are doing that thing they do whenever she’s concerned - or, well, feeling any sort of anything, really -, and Lizzie knows that her sister is still recovering from the whirlwind of near-death experiences they have faced over the last few months. She takes her hand to her twin’s hand and squeezes it once.
“It’s just MG,” she lies easily, “He’s just sending me a few links I asked for. It’s okay,” She reassures her sister, because, really, she’s not exactly lying, and continues, “Now, go on.”
Josie seems to believe her, then, and her shoulders visibly drop in relief. She nods and turns back to their aunt, who had been watching their interaction with a soft, yet curious smile. Caroline had her eyes on Lizzie, as if she could’ve sniffed out the bullshit from where she sat -- which, honestly, not surprising, because Lizzie did learn everything she knew from the older blonde, so.
Josie and Bonnie fall into conversation about the logistics of said spell and Lizzie avoids her mother’s eyes as she grabs her phone and turns it over, trying to school her expression when she scrolls down to see Hope’s panic attack in text form on her locked screen.
Hope: Fuck.
Hope: Fuck I thought this was to Landon
Hope: God can you pretend this never happened I’m so sorry fuck
Hope: Lizzie please delete this I’m so sorry your name is like right next to Landon’s on my phone and I wasn’t paying enough attention please ignore this please
Hope: Lizzie??????
Hope: Fuck.
Lizzie doesn’t unlock her phone -- no, she just puts her phone back down and focuses back on the conversation going on. Her mother’s watchful and knowing eyes were still on her, and she definitely wanted to milk this situation as much as she could -- just thinking of the all mighty Tribrid freaking out over giving Lizzie this much power over her kind of healed all remaining wounds Lizzie had because of the last few months.
She finishes her dinner, helps her mother with the dishes, has tea and plays a game with Bonnie and Josie, and only when Josie tells her she’s going to shower before bed and Bonnie and Caroline start watching a movie does she allow herself to fish her phone out of her back pocket and look at the messages again.
Lizzie: Huh. I thought you and Landon broke up.
The response is immediate.
Hope: We did. And thanks for answering so fast, btw, that was much appreciated.
Lizzie can hear the disdain in the girl’s voice through text and it makes her smile -- a full blown smile, with dimples and all.
Lizzie: Sorry, Mikaelson, but quality family time comes before booty calls.
Hope: that’s not what that was!!!! It wasn’t meant for you!!! You didn’t have to keep me waiting
Lizzie: Waiting? My, my, Mikaelson
Lizzie is sure that she looks like a maniac now -- she can feel her cheeks cramping up with the smile and she’s sure that her mother and her aunt are bound to notice. She quickly excuses herself from the room, then, saying she’s going to grab some air. The older women nod at her as she walks out through the sliding doors leading to the patio and Lizzie can feel her mother’s eyes on her as she waits for Hope’s response.
Hope: Fuck off, Saltzman, that’s not what I meant
Hope: For real though.
Lizzie sat down on one of the poolside chairs and exhaled a happy sigh before she started typing again.
Lizzie: :) A bathtub, huh? I guess you two are tiny enough that it would work.
Hope: Shut up.
Lizzie: No, I’m having fun.
Lizzie: What were you expecting? A blast from the past? Reconnections through the wire? Aren’t you like, in New Orleans right now?
Hope: Fuck off. And yeah, I am
Lizzie: Soooo……… what was the intentions, Mikaelson?? We’re friends now, best friends even, I deserve to know
Hope: You don’t deserve anything, but I was drunk.
Lizzie: Was?
Hope: This sobered me up pretty well.
Lizzie snickers. She makes a decision and clicks on a few buttons and takes her phone to her ear and waits. Hope answers on the third beep. “ Why are you calling me?”
“Texting just wasn’t enough,” Lizzie answers airily, more than enjoying the absolute trepidation in the other girl’s tone. She smiles when Hope sighs on the other end.
“I deserve this, I suppose.”
“Mm,” Lizzie hums, doesn’t disagree. She can practically hear the eye roll from miles away. She smirks when she hears movement on the other side of the call, “You still waiting for me to join you, Mikaelson?”
“Fuck off, Lizzie,” Hope grumbles on the other end, “Did you delete the picture already?”
“Nah, I’m in no rush.”
“You’re unbelievable.”
“Thanks.”
“Not a compliment. Delete the picture. Seriously.”
Lizzie rolls her eyes, “Calm down, Mikaelson. It’s not like I’m planning on keeping the picture to myself or anything, as hot as it may look.”
She closes her eyes, quickly catching herself on.
There’s silence in the other end and she thinks that maybe she’s just handed Hope the knife to stab her with back. Oh, well, fucking at least it hadn’t been written down where Hope could save it and rub it on her face later.
(So much for having the upper hand. The universe really could be one petty motherf-)
“I won’t mention it if you won’t.” Hope says suddenly, voice somewhat strained. Lizzie quickly understands the meaning behind the words, understand what’s being proposed.
“Mention what?”
“Good girl.”
And --
“That’s -”
“Nope. Not happening. Can’t talk about it because this didn’t happen.”
There’s a lot that Lizzie suddenly wants to unpack here, but for the time being --
“Right. Yeah.” There’s a pause, and then a thought comes to mind, “Um, I know this didn’t happen, but like - are you gonna, or did you, I mean -” She pauses, tries to formulate her question, and Hope waits, “Are you going to send it to…”
“No.” Hope answers quickly. “It was a dumb idea. I’m kind of glad it went your way instead, weirdly.”
“Me too,” Lizzie says, way too fucking quickly - again, because it wouldn’t be her if she didn’t -, and she hears Hope’s intake of breath on the other end and closes her eyes, wishing more than anything that she could just, like, not -- “I mean -”
She stops, because as it turns out, she doesn’t know what she means. Hope waits, and Lizzie scrambles to come up with anything. She fails to, because she sees Josie approaching her with a curious look on her face, and she wonders if she looks as panicked as she feels. “Josie, hey!”
Josie frowns at her manic greeting and waves, and Lizzie talks into the phone, “So, I have to go, MG, because I’m pretty tired and today’s been a long day and --”
“Alright. Okay. Um. Goodnight, Liz.” Lizzie doesn’t think about how Hope’s tone is almost deflated on the other end, way too fucking grateful that her twin had showed up when she did.
“‘Kay, night, bye!” She ends the call and locks her phone quickly and turns to her twin, trying her hardest to not act like the world’s biggest maniac.
“How’s MG?” Josie asks when she stops in front of her sister, and her eyes are suspicious but she doesn’t question her out loud -- sometimes Josie knew that it was just best to let Lizzie figure things out before getting involved.
“Fine,” She says, rubbing her hands together before she stands up and starts to make her way back to the house, “Now, if you’ll excuse me, I really need to shower.”
(Lots of thinking to do.)
Josie watches her sister walk away with a confused frown, and Lizzie makes a mental note to try and get it together before they start thinking that she’s about to have another episode -- and all of this because Hope Mikaelson can’t seem to know how to read properly.
She closes the bathroom door behind her and unlocks her phone, her screen still opened on the messages and her heart all but jumps in her chest when she sees the three dots bubble come up on the screen for a few seconds before it disappears for good, signaling that Hope had given up on whatever she had wanted to say. Lizzie exhales, sliding down the door slowly as she grimaces.
As she was saying earlier, Lizzie Saltzman was no stranger to booty calls.
This, however, was bound to be a fucking problem.
( Thanks a lot, Mikaelson. )