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“Hyung, when will you come back to visit?” Yoongi asks, head resting on Seokjin’s shoulder as they watch the television together. They’re sitting side by side on Seokjin’s bed, a box of cookies placed on his lap as a gift from his grandmother.
“I don’t know yet, Yoongi. It’s college and I’m gonna study in another city so I probably wouldn’t be here a lot.”
Yoongi sighs, pushing the box of cookies from his lap and letting it land on the bed.
“Don’t you want the cookies?” Yoongi never denies the cookies.
“I’m not hungry.”
“But you love those cookies.”
“I said I’m not hungry, hyung,” he snaps, making Seokjin fall silent. Yoongi clenches his hands into fists, hesitantly looking at Seokjin in guilt. He never snaps at Seokjin. “I’m sorry, hyung, I just- I don’t know. I feel lost.”
Seokjin shifts closer, hand reaching out to hold Yoongi’s. “Hey.” He intertwines their fingers together, just the way Yoongi likes to. “Is it because of me leaving?”
Yoongi’s lower lip trembles, eyes casting downwards to avoid Seokjin’s. “Hyung,” he calls, grip tightening. “I don’t want you to leave.”
“Yoongi-”
“And I know I’m too old to be this- to be this annoying and childish, but I just-”
“You’re not annoying, Yoongi. I understand why you’re upset, okay? We’ve been best friends for more than ten years.”
Yoongi scoffs. “Fuck. I’m too old to be this emotional about a friend leaving.” He chuckles, holding Seokjin’s hand between both of his and caressing it gently. “Hyung, I suck at making friends,” he admits out loud.
Seokjin laughs lightly. “You just have to make some friends for your last year in high school. And after that, you’ll be in college with me, okay? We’ll be a lot closer by then. We can share a dorm and I’ll always be there. You won’t have to be afraid anymore, okay? Just finish this year and everything will be fine.”
Yoongi licks his dry lips before nodding. “Okay, hyung. I’ll try.”
Seokjin smiles. “That’s great, Yoon. Hyung believes in you.” He leans in to press his lips on Yoongi’s forehead.
“I’ll miss you, hyung.” Yoongi looks up to Seokjin and the older boy couldn’t help but feel a warmth spreading all through his chest. The corner of his lips twitches upwards. Yoongi really looks too adorable for his own good.
“I know. I’ll miss you too. I’ll come to visit as much as I can, okay?”
“Okay, hyung. Thank you.”
❀
But it turns out that being alone in a place with so many people is a lot worse than what Yoongi had expected. He had spent almost his whole life with Seokjin and not being with him for a whole year- Yoongi doesn’t know how he’ll survive.
Middle school was different. With Seokjin being a year ahead of him, he had to enter high school first, but Yoongi managed to go through his last year without any struggle in finding new friends. He didn’t need new friends. He had Seokjin and it was enough. Sure, his days at school were pretty boring without Seokjin to talk to, but whenever he goes back to their treehouse after school, he would feel a lot happier again. At least he still got to see Seokjin daily back then.
But this time, it’s completely different. Yoongi really is alone. Seokjin is in Seoul, studying hard to be a doctor someday, and Yoongi is here whining about his lack of friends.
It’s only the first day and it’s bad already. Yoongi couldn’t talk to anyone. He tried approaching a group of people who looked nice so he could have lunch with them, but they just looked at him weirdly and told him that all the seats are occupied already. Yoongi knows they’re lying because he saw one of the guys hiding a perfectly empty chair behind him.
But Yoongi just nods and leaves them alone. He knows when he’s not wanted. And so he occupies that one empty table at the corner, feeling his chest tighten at the feeling of rejection. He wishes Seokjin was here. If he was, then they could eat lunch together and Yoongi can whine about the stupid rowdy kids in his class, and Seokjin would smile and treat him milkshake just so he would feel better.
He decided to just mind his own business. He doesn’t need friends. He can spend this whole year alone without anyone annoying him.
“He’s sitting alone now. What a freak,” someone whispers, startling Yoongi from eating. Who are they talking about?
But as soon as he found the source of the sound, his gaze connected with one of them. Are they talking about him?
“What the fuck are you looking at?” the boy asks, immediately annoying Yoongi. Oh, how he would love to fuck up this guy’s face, but he has to stand down. He can’t create any mess now to disrupt his studies. He has to graduate soon so he could be with Seokjin again.
“Nothing,” he answers, eyes drifting back to his food.
“Looking for other men now because your boyfriend is gone? Don’t fucking involve us in your gayness, Min. Go to your boyfriend and suck his dick.”
Something snaps inside of Yoongi, making him stand up and walk towards the table of the guy spouting nonsense. He glares at him, jaw tight as he clenches his hands into fists, trying to stop himself from starting a fight. “Don’t fucking talk about hyung like that, you fucking bastard. Do that again and I’ll fucking kill you.” He walks away right there and then, lunch completely forgotten.
Yoongi just wants Seokjin back.
He came home that afternoon and passed by Seokjin’s house. He saw the empty treehouse and he felt his heart drop. Seokjin isn’t there anymore.
❀
“Did you have fun at school?” Hyunwoo, his father, asks as soon as he reaches the dining room. He takes a seat next to his grandmother, opting to picking on his food instead of eating it. “Yoongi?”
Yoongi looks up and sees his father looking at him expectantly “Oh, yeah, it was okay,” he lies. It’s not okay. Seokjin isn’t there so how could it ever be okay?
“Did you make new friends?” his grandmother asks.
“No.”
“Honey,” his mother, Soojin, calls with a worried voice. “You have to make new friends. You can’t spend your whole year alone.”
“I have a friend. I have Jin-hyung,” he argues, not feeling hungry anymore.
He saw his parents exchange a glance. “Yes, but he’s in college and you have a whole year left before you can be in the same school as him again. You can’t rely on him that much, Yoongi. You need to have more friends.”
“Well, I don’t want to!” he yells, immediately leaving his chair and running back to his room so he could lock himself inside.
He jumps on the bed, burying his face on the pillow.
He could feel how heavy his heart is starting to weigh, and it sucks. He hasn’t felt like this in so long, so why does it need to happen now?
A small sob escapes his mouth, tears falling uncontrollably from his eyes and soaking the pillow. He just misses Seokjin so bad.
The sound of his phone ringing interrupts him. He grabs the phone from his bedside table, sniffling when he sees Seokjin’s name on it. Why is he calling right now when Yoongi is so vulnerable?
He forces himself to stop crying before answering the call, trembling hands holding the phone against his ear. “Hello?”
“Hey, Yoongi.” It’s Seokjin.
Yoongi’s lips tremble. He gulps as he tries to stop himself from crying again. He misses Seokjin’s voice.
“Hey, hyung. Why did you call?”
“You sound weird. Is everything okay?” A tear fell on Yoongi’s cheek and he wipes it so suddenly, not wanting to seem weak in front of Seokjin even though the older man can’t see him.
“Yeah, I’m fine,” he says. Seokjin should be focusing on his studies right now instead of worrying about Yoongi.
“Your grandmother called me and said you’re not feeling too good today. Is it because of school? Are you not coping well? You can tell hyung anything, Yoongi.”
And with just that, Yoongi starts crying again. Seokjin is just so comforting and Yoongi never did learn how to lie to Seokjin. “Hyung,” he calls with a trembling voice, sobs threatening to escape his mouth. “Hyung, I miss you.”
He hears shuffling on the other end of the line. It sounds a lot like Seokjin trying to leave his bed. “Are you crying? Shit, Yoongi, don’t cry. It’ll get better, okay? It’ll be easier. You just have to get used to it. I know that some people are really shitty in that school, but don’t mind them. Hyung is here. You can talk to me anytime you need to. Don’t cry, please. I hate it when you cry.”
Yoongi bites his lower lip, breathing in deeply to stop himself from crying. He’s a grown man, for god’s sake. He shouldn’t even be crying over something as simple as this.
“Okay, hyung. Thank you.”
“Are you feeling better now?”
“Yeah, now that I heard your voice.”
Seokjin chuckles softly from the other line and Yoongi couldn’t help but smile. His chest feels a lot lighter now that he heard Seokjin’s voice.
“Have you eaten yet, hyung?”
“Of course I did! As if I would ever miss a meal,” he huffs, making Yoongi chuckle.
“Okay, that’s good. Don’t miss your meals.”
“Now, go eat your dinner. We can’t have you going to sleep when you’re hungry,” Seokjin scolds. A stupidly huge grin forms on Yoongi’s face, his heart beating loudly against his chest.
“Yeah, okay, I will.”
“Promise me you’ll eat. Don’t miss meals. You’re too skinny already.”
“Okay, hyung, I promise.”
“Good,” says Seokjin. “Do your homework after, and then go to sleep, okay? You have school tomorrow.”
Yoongi’s heart feels heavier again. He really doesn’t want to go to school.
“Hey, I can feel your negativity through the phone already,” Seokjin says with a firm voice. Yoongi purses his lips. He can’t really deny that. Seokjin understands him best. “Listen, go to school and try to make some friends.” Yoongi groans, making Seokjin stop for a while. “Hey! Don’t give me that attitude! Try to make some friends. You probably haven’t met the right people to be friends with, and that’s okay. You can try again.”
“But hyung, I really don’t want to.”
“You have to. You’re going to college with me, remember?” Yoongi shuts up after that. “So you have to go to school to graduate and then you can stay with me again, okay?”
“Okay, hyung.”
“And you can call me every night so you wouldn’t get lonely.”
“Yeah, okay.”
“And I’ll try to visit on weekends. I miss your chubby cheeks already.”
Yoongi groans. “Stop pinching my cheeks. They’re getting puffier because of you.”
Seokjin hums in what seems like satisfaction. “You’re welcome. I’ll make sure to pinch them more.”
“I said don’t do it!”
Seokjin laughs, and Yoongi calms down at the sound. “Now go eat your dinner. I’ll still be here whenever you need me, okay?”
“Okay, hyung.”
“I’ll see you soon, Yoongi. Goodbye!”
“Bye, hyung. I’ll see you.”
Seokjin makes a kissing sound before ending the call, making Yoongi giggle. Shit, he really wants Seokjin back already.
❀
Yoongi starts to try making friends after that talk with Seokjin. He found people to talk to and eat lunch with. And even if they aren’t half as close to him as Seokjin is and he wouldn’t consider them as close friends, it still means a lot to have someone to talk to in school.
Before, he looked forward to spending time with Seokjin inside their treehouse, but now, what he’s looking forward to, is their phone calls. It’s not much. He still prefers seeing Seokjin and being near him, but it’ll do for now. He studies hard every day so he could graduate soon and finally go to college with Seokjin.
Seokjin kept his promises too. He calls regularly and he even came back home to visit Yoongi on the weekend. It baffles Yoongi that Seokjin went to see him first before his own family, but he couldn’t find it in himself to care because Seokjin is here and he could touch him. He’s not only a voice on the phone anymore, and it feels good, really. It feels so amazing to be able to hug Seokjin again and to hear his real voice without a phone separating them.
“Wanna go to our treehouse? I miss Jjangu,” Seokjin says, still being suffocated by Yoongi’s tight hug.
“Y-yeah, okay, let’s go.” Yoongi grabs Seokjin’s hand, clasping it together with his as they walk to their treehouse, the place where they first met.
Seokjin takes Jjangu from inside their house and climbs up the treehouse to see Yoongi waiting there.
It’s silly. Two grown men playing with a dog inside a treehouse, but who cares? Yoongi has Seokjin again, even just for a day, and he really couldn’t give a shit about what other people will think.
Seokjin leaves the next day, having a tight schedule for college but prioritizing Yoongi above everything else. “I’ll be back next week. Don’t look at me as if I won’t return,” Seokjin teases, pinching Yoongi’s cheek and making the younger boy cry out.
“Stop it!” Yoongi complains. Seokjin releases his hold on Yoongi’s cheek, chuckling softly at the boy’s expression. “You’ll come back?”
“Of course I will. When did I ever break my promises?”
“You’ll call me every night?”
“Of course, Yoongi.”
Yoongi purses his lips, tilting his head to look up at Seokjin. The older boy hasn’t stopped growing and he’s standing too tall in front of Yoongi. Yoongi used to dream of reaching Seokjin’s height when they were kids but he really just gave up at this point. “I’ll miss you, hyung.”
Seokjin smiles. “I’ll miss you too.”
“I’m gonna study really hard and I’ll go to college with you, hyung.”
“I know.”
“I’ll wait for you to come back next week.”
“You will?” Seokjin asks with a smile, feeling his heart flutter inside his chest.
“Of course I will,” Yoongi answers with a gummy smile. “I’ll always wait for you.”