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Before You Lay Me to Waste

Summary:

This is essentially "Before I Fall to Ruin" from Rey's POV--it's the view from the floor over which Kylo dances.

Notes:

Please enjoy this moodboard by situation_normal; if it looks familiar, that's because it is.

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Work Text:

Somehow, in between stepping out of her Lyft to meet her friends on the sidewalk and walking into First Order, Rey’s attitude had improved.  

Maybe it was the pretty Lyft driver’s wink as Rey said her thanks and stepped out of the car.  Rey was still smiling as she punched in a five-star review and significant tip for the friendly woman who’d picked her up and dropped her off.

Or maybe it was the beefy bouncer’s wink as Rey’s cash was waved off and she was let into First Order without paying, along with Rose and Poe’s girlfriend Kay.  

For that matter, maybe it was the stern bartender’s surprising wink as Rey finally got up to the front of the queue at the bar.   And the music here was fun! The song that was playing as she’d jockeyed for position was one she’d always loved. That distorted guitar line sounded like nothing else.  The tune was engaging, but the lyrics were so bleak. There was even a whole verse about a sad club . . . 

No, she was out to have fun.  Rey lifted her chin and responded to the bartender’s wink with a wide smile, raising her voice just enough to make her order heard.

The bartender smiled back when Rey slid a handsome cash tip over the bar after taking delivery of five wildly different drinks for her party. Well, of course.  Since she was the one celebrating, she’d given a firm promise that the first round was on her.  

She waved to her friends and distributed the drinks.  This was going to be a good night. Rey’s mood elevated even before she took the first sip of her gin and tonic.  As always, she smiled into the sky at her first sip. Her father had always called gin “the gentleman’s quaff.” When Rey was old enough, she’d asked cheekily if it was also the gentlewoman’s drink.  Apparently, it was, but it was also the gentlewoman’s duty (as much as it was the gentleman’s) to keep away from “shit gin.” 

For this reason, Rey always ordered her gin by name and had in her head a descending order of gin quality--’If they don’t have that , order this ’--and so on.  Amusingly, Rey had not yet reached the bottom of Bail’s gin hierarchy and been forced to leave a bar with a look of disbelief and a sniff of disdain.  She was actually slightly unsure that she could pull off the necessary haughtiness for such a thing, but here in the States, her accent might just do the job for her.  Maybe.

Just as well she didn’t have to do that now.  The first choice had been prominently displayed behind the bar.

And, to First Order’s credit?  That was actually what was in Rey’s glass.  She’d heard about bars who would try to run a bait-and-switch even if you tried to order by name.  Others might be duped, but Rey could actually tell and would have--well, she doesn’t even know what she would have done.  Maybe summoned some of that hauteur that her father had assured her was her birthright as a gently-raised Englishwoman? She’d always laughed at him and responded that having been only partially gently-raised, she was still mostly feral. 

That was fine, anyway.  Her drink was good and her friends were happy.  

The song playing as she sipped her drink and laughed with her friends was another downer--the singer was clearly an emotional vampire who wanted nothing more than to leech his partner’s happiness and use it to soothe his own grim soul.  

Whatever.  Rey savored her drink and enjoyed the company.  Kay, the newcomer among them, fit in surprisingly well with the group.  Kay’s care for Poe was so evident that she clearly belonged among the others who’d cared for him before she’d come along.  It was easy to bring in someone with a mutual interest.

So it really felt natural to include Kay in Rey’s usual manic dancing to the next song.  It had always been a favorite. Dizzy kisses, fantasies of running away, everything Rey had privately dreamed of, even at her most lost and lonely.  

Joyfully, Rey twirled in turn with every member of her party.  Once she had, she walked breathlessly to the bar. The crowd had subsided, and she didn’t even have to queue.  

“Same for you?” the stone-faced bartender inquired, already reaching for the gin Rey had named on her first trip to the bar.

Rey nodded, smiling.  Again, she tipped generously, winning another improbable wink from behind the bar.  The glass was frosty and perfect when she picked it up. She sipped it slowly, watching her dearest friends dancing happily with their partners.  

Something drew her gaze up, and it was only then that she noticed the cages suspended over the dance floor.  There were several; each held one person dancing alone. All were dressed appropriately for the theme evening--dark, retro-goth clothing, with suggestive hints of fetishwear.

One of the caged men caught her eye.  His body was solid and powerful, muscles straining at the leather straps over his torso.  Her mind filled with the idea of a cathedral--stone foundations necessary, decorations optional, but essential.

She shook her head. Tonight was for fun, not for her architectural fantasies.  The fast pace of this week should have been a reminder to her to leave her work at work, but no, her brain still functioned in blueprints, in CAD, and in slick renderings of the world as she wanted to build it.

Then a familiar bassline began.  Rey had to get out on the floor for this one, another old favorite of hers, probably one of the main ancestors of the electronica that was so popular these days. 

She’d only taken a couple sips of her gin and tonic, but her friends were happy to stand guard over her drink at the tiny cocktail table they’d commandeered.

Rey twirled alone on the floor, losing herself to the music, abandoned to a daydream.

It was silly, so silly, and so far away from where she was right now.  She should be present in her moment, shouldn’t she? But. She couldn’t pull her mind from the song.  Every time she thought of him . . . and she did, entirely too often. Had he sent up a prayer when he saw her fall?  The fall . . . was something she didn’t even want to think about, though. But he’d come to her rescue so quickly that she couldn’t just leave it behind.

They’d had a connection, hadn’t they?  They rode the same train and she was sure that they’d see each other again.  When they’d met after dispatching the red-hoodied muggers, she’d felt a sensation like a bolt from the universe.  They were meant  to meet.  Rey swayed and spun, smiling as she did.

Notes:

This is for situation_normal, who always sets me right when I doubt myself.

Come say hi!

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