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Sam was newly fifteen when Dean’s name appeared on his wrist.
When he’d woken up that morning and discovered it, he felt numb. He’d heard of people getting their sibling’s names before, but he didn’t think for one minute that it would ever happen to him.
Sure, Sam had been harboring some less-than-brotherly feelings towards Dean, but he’d chalked it up to teenage hormones and their twisted family situation. Never did he suspect that his older brother was his soulmate.
Sam’s eyes filled with tears as he thought of the humiliation he’d have to endure. He shivered, imagining how horrified Dean would look after seeing it. How John would disown him. I’m a freak, Sam thought, sobbing into his pillow. A freak.
~~~
Dean had given up on asking Sam why he always wore long sleeves; the terrified look in Sam’s eyes whenever he mentioned it shut Dean up right away. Who’s name could be so horrible that Sam would have to hide it from his own brother?
The curiosity was eating away at him. Dean was 19 and still hadn’t had a name appear on any part of his body, which was normal for the most part. But he cared about his little brother more than anything and he needed to know.
One night after a particularly terrifying hunt, Dean lay in the dark, unable to sleep. He knew that Sam was awake too. He always knew.
"Sammy?" Dean asked, voice breaking the silence.
"Yeah?" Sam’s voice was soft.
"It’s okay if it’s a guy, you know. Doesn’t matter to me."
"I told you to shut up about that. Please, Dean. Just..please…" Sam’s voice broke and Dean’s stomach plummeted.
"Shit, Sam, ‘m sorry. Don’t cry, come on. I’ll shut up, I swear—"
"Fuck off." Sam’s voice was more pained than Dean had ever heard it.
Dean sat in stunned silence until the sun came up.
~~~
A few days passed and Sam, aside from being slightly more distant, acted as if nothing had happened. Dean promised himself that he would never ask Sam about his soulmate again.
That was, until Dean woke up with Sam’s name on his skin.
Dean stared at himself in the bathroom mirror, eyes wide and disbelieving. But there it was, right in front of him. S A M etched across his left shoulder.
His first thought was that this was another Sam, a girl maybe. But deep inside of him, Dean knew that this wasn’t the case.
What he saw in Sam’s eyes on a daily basis mirrored his own. The shame, the humiliation. Everything was clicking into place.
Dean bolted out of the bathroom and made a beeline for his little brother, who had just finished getting dressed and stood across the room.
"Dean, hey. I didn’t see you get up—"
Dean, blinded by a deluge of emotions, shoved a stunned Sam up against the bedroom wall and held him there by the hem of his shirt.
"Is it me?" He demanded, tone severe and almost threatening. Dean’s face softened, however, when his little brother’s eyes widened in horror and brimmed with tears.
"I’m sorry, I’m so sorry." Sam mumbled, avoiding Dean’s eyes and squirming in his grip.
Well, that answered Dean’s question.
"Sam. Look at me."
Reluctantly, Sam raised his eyes and hazel met green. Dean didn’t say a word and Sam looked at him for a moment, confused, until he noticed a name branded into Dean’s shoulder.
If possible, Sam’s eyes grew even wider.
"It…it says ‘Sam’." Sam said, voice almost inaudible.
"Yeah. It does. You know what that means?" Dean’s voice was rough.
"It means that you’re my…" Sam trailed off and Dean could feel him trembling slightly beneath him.
"Soulmate." Dean finished Sam’s sentence for him.
"But we…we can’t…" Sam said, looking as if he were in a daze.
"Yeah, we can. I know how fucked up this is, Sam, I really do. But you’re all I’ve got."
Sam stared up at Dean, who looked determined.
"Okay." Sam whispered, feeling Dean’s tight grip on him loosen. Dean was closer now; Sam could feel his breath on his lips.
"I’m gonna kiss you, okay?"
Sam gasped and his face flushed. He nodded, unable to get words out.
And then Dean’s lips were on Sam’s.