Work Text:
awh yess!!! cat dads <3
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When Andrew came home with the cats, he expected Neil to be indifferent. Instead, Neil decided to treat them like they were his children. Actually, he referred to them as “our children”, which irritated Andrew.
They were just cats. Just balls of fur with really convincing faces. Their eyes never worked on Andrew, but they had Neil wrapped around their paws. Neil bought them a cat tower and the expensive food that Sir would eat constantly if he could. Andrew hated it. They were so spoiled.
Their breath smelled, and Andrew noticed that when Neil would shove the cats in his face to prove to him that they were cute.
Andrew never said they weren’t cute, all he said was that they were menaces. Constantly causing problems. They were pests, and Andrew already had an entire team of them.
“Andrew, we have a problem,” Neil said, barging into their shared room. Andrew didn’t look up. Neil did this daily, announcing that there was a problem that wasn’t really a problem. “Andrew, I’m serious. Sir just threw his food across the room and King knocked our takeout off the counter.”
“Little bastards,” Andrew said, moving from where he sat on the floor. Neil left the doorway and Andrew followed him to the kitchen. Sir turned his head to look at Andrew, eyes glistening and paw hovering over his water bowl. “Don’t you dare,” Andrew said, pointing his finger at Sir. “If you touch that bowl you’ll be sleeping outside tonight.”
Neil had been hovering behind Andrew the entire time, but moved forward to slap Andrew’s arm. “Don’t talk to our children that way,” he said, suddenly on the cats’ side.
Andrew only rolled his eyes, picking up the bag of takeout that was launched off of the counter. “They obviously got your dumbass genes if they’re our children.”
Neil only sighed, reaching and picking up King and holding her up to Andrew’s face. “Look at her! We both are cute. You can’t say no to either of us and we know it.”
Andrew scoffed, “No. Now if you don’t mind,” Andrew held the bag in front of Neil’s face, “I’m taking this to our room and going back to the book I was reading.” He turned on his foot and stalked off, stopping abruptly at the doorway. He turned again, pointing at the cats, “If this isn’t cleaned up by the time I’m done, you two will be made into a new rug. I’m serious.”
Neil stayed in the kitchen with them, talking to them and reminding them that Andrew’s threats weren’t serious. Neil ended up cleaning up their mess. He always did.
Later that night when they were done eating dinner and were sitting on the couch, Andrew called him out on it. “You spoil them.”
Neil nudged him with his shoulder, “Maybe I do. Are you jealous?” Andrew didn’t answer, instead he moved away from Neil. “Don’t be that way, Andrew.” But as quick as Andrew had Neil’s attention, it was gone again. King and Sir were purring and pawing at Neil’s legs. In seconds they were between Neil and Andrew, snuggled into the blanket the two were sharing. “I know you like them, Drew.” Neil put King on Andrew’s lap. “Look at that! She likes you too,” he cooed, taking a picture with his phone.
“Fuck off, Josten. I should have never brought them to you.”
“You love us, don’t lie,” Neil smirked, melting into Andrew’s side.
Andrew woke up later with the two cats awake and Neil asleep on his side. The cats noticed he was awake, and their eyes were trained on him menacingly. “Fine,” Andrew sighed. “I can tolerate you.”
Neil shifted in his sleep and Sir meowed in approval. Andrew held his breath, hoping Neil wouldn’t wake up. He closed his eyes again and went back to sleep, planning not to let Neil ever find out that he could possibly like the cats.
“You like them, huh? I knew it.”
“Shut up, Josten.”