Chapter Text
Winwin hated parties. He always had. He had been to his fair share, but he had found none of them to be enjoyable in the slightest.
Still, he remembered every single party he had ever attended in vivid detail. He remembered the host. He remembered the date. He remembered the address. He remembered who had made out with whom. He remembered who had been the most hungover the next day. He remembered who had posted the most embarrassing Snapchat stories. He remembered who had broken up and he remembered who had gotten (back) together.
But most important of all, he remembered which of his friends had gotten the drunkest. At their first party, Yangyang had been the one. It had been at Becky Samberg’s house. Her parents had gone away for the weekend and so she had invited, what felt like, the entire school. It had been loud. It had been claustrophobic. And it had ended with Yangyang vomiting into a bush.
At his fifth party, it had been Johnny. It had been at Jeremy Miller’s aunt’s house. Rumor had had it that she was getting a facelift. Whether or not this was true Winwin never did get to find out, he would have remembered if he had. One thing he did remember, however, was that she had chosen her nephew to housesit, something she would come to regret later on when Johnny drunkenly drove her Vespa into the pool.
At his tenth party, it had been Lucas. It had actually been at Lucas’ place. His parents had gone away to celebrate their twentieth wedding anniversary. Lucas had drunkenly tried to impress Jungwoo by doing some sort of fire trick. Winwin hadn’t been there in person to see it, he would have remembered, otherwise. And the people who actually had been there only gave very unreliable reports involving Lucas’ mother’s gas stove, one of Lucas’ father’s very expensive cigars and a matchstick. How these objects were connected and in what order things had gone down varied depending on who you asked, but it always ended with Lucas setting his mother’s stove on fire and being grounded for at least six months.
Winwin could go on for hours about his intense hatred for parties and every time his friends would suggest going to one, he did.
“You know what your problem is,” Johnny interrupted him.
They were all sitting at lunch while Winwin was going on about the last party they had attended. It had been at Julia Diaz’ house. Her parents had gone to a wedding in Columbia. And it had ended with that sophomore Mark vomiting on Winwin’s new shoes.
“You need to get laid,” Johnny said, “and parties are actually a great place for that.”
“Oh, fuck off,” Winwin said and threw one of his cold, weirdly mushy cafeteria fries at Johnny. He ended up hitting Lucas instead.
“Dude,” Lucas said and picked the fry off of his hoodie and put it in his mouth.
“Bro, that’s so disgusting.” Yangyang grimaced.
“What,” Lucas shrugged, “that was a perfectly good fry. My mom is on this new vegan, gluten-free, hippie-dippy shit and I haven’t eaten anything that doesn’t look or taste like cardboard in at least a week.”
“A week?” Winwin asked, pretending to be shocked. “I wish you had said something sooner. We’ll probably lose you to malnourishment soon.” He put his hand on his heart and gave Lucas a look filled with pretend compassion. “But you know what, I think I could live with that.”
“You know what, dude,” Lucas said, “I would have taken your side in this because you so nicely threw a fry at me, but now I think Johnny’s right: You need to get some.”
“Who needs to get some?” Jungwoo asked and sat down next to Lucas.
“Winwin,” Lucas said and gave Jungwoo a kiss on the cheek.
Winwin rolled his eyes, honestly not sure whether it was because of how disgustingly cute Lucas and Jungwoo were or because of Lucas’ comment.
“So, are you guys coming to Yeri’s party on Saturday?” Jungwoo asked.
“Yes,” Johnny, Yangyang and Lucas said.
“No,” Winwin muttered.
“Why?” Jungwoo turned to look at him. “Parties are a great place to hook up with someone.”
Winwin gestured between him and Johnny. “Did you guys plan this? Is this some sort of joke?”
“No, it’s just common sense,” Jungwoo answered while checking his phone. “Walk me to class, babe,” he said to Lucas, “I need to talk to Mr. Tanner about my biology project.”
Lucas got up and picked up Jungwoo’s bag. Together they disappeared in the sea of chatting highschoolers.
“If "getting some", means having to carry around someone else’s bag, I’m good,” Winwin said. He demonstratively put air quotes around the words "getting some".
“I’d do it,” Yangyang admitted.
“Those attitudes are precisely why neither of you is getting any.” Johnny got up and stretched his enormously long legs. Winwin sometimes wondered how he fit them underneath the small cafeteria tables in the first place.
“See ya later, losers,” Johnny said and started walking away.
“That doesn’t make any sense,” Winwin shouted after him, “our attitudes are literally opposite of each other.”
Johnny turned around to look at them, now walking backwards. He spread his arms like he was proclaiming some sort of prophecy. “Maybe therein lies the answer.”
"Asshole," Winwin whispered to himself.