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He felt like he could still here what she said, ringing in his head.
"You're really the worst, Violet!"
Violet could still see the image of her tear stained face, stricken with sorrow. He didn't mean to do it. He didn't mean to lead her on, to make her cry, he didn't mean to do any of this. She had comforted him in one of his worst times, and yet, just as quickly as she had taken onto him, he had dropped her. It's been days since they broke up. But he couldn't get over it, even if he was the one who broke up with her.
He was ridden with guilt.
She deserved better. He told himself. She doesn't deserve someone like me.
Was there a place he could go at the moment? A place where could drown himself in his sorrows?
No. He shook his head. I've changed for the better. I'm not going back to that life style.
His feet were dragging on, walking on, all without an idea of where they were going.
It was just forward and on from here.
Violet thought of his where he was, trying to gather comprehensible thought.
He's in Perland. His home.
Then he thought of Pavel. Pavel....
He wanted to see Pavel.
The same Pavel who put up with him through everything.
It's been a few weeks since he's seen him.
How was he? How was he doing? Was he okay?
But he didn't know where he'd be. If he'd even be anywhere at all, assuming he wasn't dead.
No, he couldn't be dead, he's Pavel. Violet told himself. He's more than capable of surviving. This is the same man who survived what happened with Straze. He's an ace, like me. There's no way he'd fall that easily. He paused that train of thought for a moment. Should he really be comparing Pavel to himself? The trustworthy, hardworking and cutthroat loyal Pavel, contrasted to a good for nothing like himself.
I need to stop thinking. He thought, I need to go pass out and sleep somewhere. Yes. Sleep. Sleep sounded like a good idea. He needed just a little more rest.
But where? was the question that this always lead to. Where would he go? He could go to his house. But his own house reminded him too much of himself, and himself was the last thing Violet wanted to think about at the moment.
He thought of Pavel again. That... That park. He forgot its name, but he remembered pleasant moments there. Moments involving Pavel and him as newly fledged raiders. He remembered where it was. He remembered each step he needed to take to get there.
Violet broke out into a sprint, running past all the passing people giving him weird looks. He needed to go there.
He raced past houses, shops, weird statues of grumpy past leaders which scared him as a child, dark alley ways. He strained his body to get there as fast as possible. And then he was there.
The sight of the rolling grass fields, the shelter of the clumps of the trees which were spread in a pattern which seemed to resemble one of the crests. He had his hands on his knees, trying to catch his breath. He was here. The place where he needed be. Slowly, he made his way to one of the tree clumps further in the park, near the middle. He fell onto the grass.
It was a little itchy. But he didn't care. He closed his eyes, the sun shining warmly on his face. The sound of leaves and grass rustling in the wind comforted him. He felt more at peace here.
His head was empty.
"Ralph, come back! What's gotten into you this time?" Pavel. Violet heard Pavel. A warm rush of mixed emotions flooded in him just as he felt a furry mass on top of his arm.
He opened his eyes. The green wolf started at him. He stared back. Then he saw Pavel, who just emerged from the trees, staring at him.
"Violet..?" He asked, his voice quiet.
Violet smiled weakly. "That's me." He said. "Yours truly."
"What are you doing on the ground?" Pavel asked, adjusting his green collar. "I thought the dirt was too lowly for you."
Violet's smile turned sad. "Sometimes, even Violet Harrison has to learn a little humility."
Pavel walked over and crouched down next to Ralph, putting his hand on the wolf. "What happened?" He asked. "Did something happen with Luluca?"
Ouch. He hit the nail right on the head. Violet nodded and took a deep breath. "I... I broke up with her." He admitted.
Pavel looked confused. "Why?" He asked.
"I just... didn't feel like it was romantic. Like we were better off as friends, y'know?" Violet blew a lock of hair out of his face, the grass touching his the right side of his face, irritating him slightly. "She was something else... just not the something else for me. But I still feel like such an asshole." He gave a hollow laugh. "I led her on. I.."
Pavel stared at him. "Violet," he began, his gaze unwavering. "Cerise once told me that feelings can change. He told me not to be scared of bringing people pain. He said that... Whatever happens, it's better you let it go before it got worse. Longevity will just hurt them more." He paused, "She told me it was okay." He muttered. "Okay that I let her go. Because at least I could be happy. And then she could be happy. Plus, there was someone else on my mind."
"Someone else?" Violet echoed. Pavel nodded.
"Yeah." He replied, and he left it at that.
Violet smiled, genuinely. "Thank you for that." He said, and reached out. He brushed some of Ralph's hair off his cheek.
Pavel blinked.
Violet laughed, and it was a genuine, hearty laugh, "Sorry. Ralph's fur got onto your cheek." He thought that Pavel looked cute when he was a little flustered. The normally hardy man's softer sides were a rare sight.
Hold on... Cute? Cute... Yeah. He did look cute.
Violet thought that Pavel looked cute. He wanted to say it out loud. He wanted to tell him.
"You look cute... like this." Violet said.
"Cute..?" Pavel tilted his head.
"Yeah." Violet affirmed. And then Violet thought. Did he like Pavel, in reality? Is that why he still felt romantic attraction, but not towards Luluca? He didn't want to rush anything, though. He didn't want to immediately jump ship like he did before. Pavel doesn't deserve to be treated poorly. He was going to take it slow.But in the clearing, in that moment, he did truly feel like he could be happy, just this time.
Pavel flicked Violet's nose. "Don't try to seduce me, too."
Violet laughed, "I bet I'll treat you better than any other woman I've met."
And, deep down in his heart he meant that. He wouldn't make the same mistakes he has in the past.
And, in that clearing, in that moment, lying in the grass and staring at Pavel, Violet felt like he could be happy in the future.