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"Perfume, can you believe it!" Akari stomped around to the other side of the counter, allowing their mother to dash back to the sink and gather up more dried dishes to be put away. "I don’t even wear perfume!"
"My dear, you do not tell him such things will make you upset," Mama barely raised her eyes from her task, sighing with infinite patience.
"Should I have to tell him! You can’t expect there to be a catch-all gift for every woman you date, He should know better!" She spat out the word ‘He’, and Hikaru pushed himself closer to his notebook on the table, fearing that ‘He’ had damned their entire gender to Akari’s wrath. Mama patted Akari’s shoulder and smiled.
"Oh well - it is not serious." She drifted around the table, stroking Hikaru’s hair with a gentle hand as she passed him. "You would adore to receive even a potato if it were serious."
"Maman!" Akari called after her, but she left, waving a hand behind her to show that she would hear no more. "But if you really care about somebody," she continued, more to herself than to Hikaru, "you think about these things!"
Hikaru dared to glance up at her, as she settled to sighing heavily while she leant against the counter. He wanted to say, but you can think about it until you’re dizzy and never know what to get for someone, but he could tell that she was not to be crossed on this subject. She caught his look, and pulled up a chair across the table from him.
"What’s up, squirt? I’m not that upset, really, you know."
"No, it’s just…" He paused to consider his words with care. "What should you do, to get a present they’d really want?"
Akari straightened up and smirked at him, “Ohhh? Is my baby brother all grown up?” She reached over to ruffle his hair.
"S-stop it!" he said, batting her hands away.
"Don’t worry, kiddo, you’re doing the right thing by asking me. The girl will appreciate it, too!" Hikaru tried not to frown too hard at the mention of a girl. "It’s simple, really! Think about the things that she likes, or that she may have mentioned she wants. Also - put a bit of heart into it! It’s no good if all the boys in your class get the same idea, and can just as easily pull it off a shelf. Give her a bit of yourself!" When she was in a good mood, Akari sounded just as cheerful and bright as Mama.
Hikaru turned his face back to his notebook to hide his flushed cheeks. “I see,” he said. To give a part of himself. His chest burned with warmth as he repeated these words in his mind.
"Ah, it’s nearly nine! I suppose I should call him back…" Akari said, with resignation. "But you’ve got to tell me more about this girl of yours! I won’t forget!" She pointed a finger at him sharply, before leaving Hikaru to himself. It only took him a moment of consideration; his sister had given him the inspiration he needed. He flipped to the back of his notebook and began his sketches.
One of the colder Saturdays brought Bane to his door. Hikaru saw him approaching from the yard, and quickly threw a tarp over his project.
"Oh hey, Hikaru! You’re out here." Bane changed course, passing through the side gate. "Aren’t you cold?" he said, rolling down the sleeves of his jacket with a shiver.
"Ah, no…" Hikaru craned his head and squinted up at Bane. When Bane stepped forward, the sun disappeared behind his shoulders, and Hikaru could see that the zipper of Bane’s jacket was just an inch too high over his waist. It wasn’t fair for Bane to get bigger, while he didn’t seem to grow at all.
"So, you free? I felt like throwing the baseball."
"I can’t…" Hikaru said, in a small voice. He turned to look at the tarp, and it seemed that Bane noticed because he said,
"Oh, you’re building? Can I help?"
Hikaru’s heart sank. “No,” he said. Bane was quiet, perhaps waiting for further explanation, but it never came, and the silence stretched out between them.
"…Okay." Bane said. He scratched at the back of his head. "I just thought I hadn’t really seen you in a while, so…" There was nothing Hikaru could answer with, and the day seemed a bit colder than it had before. "…Are you upset with me?" Bane said, at length.
His breath escaped in a plume of steam. Hikaru thrust his fists down at his sides, scrunched his eyes closed, and shook his head. His words tripped over themselves in his mind, so he frowned up at Bane, mouth agape. Don’t get me wrong.
Bane’s face softened, and he tilted his head. “I getcha, it’s a secret, huh?” His whole body seemed to relax and he said, with an easy smile, “You better tell me what you’re building when you’re done!”
He kept two more nails squeezed against his lip as he steadied one against the wood. The early sunshine wasn’t warm enough to make the press of metal on his skin a pleasant experience, but he endured it. The end was in sight. Hikaru deftly drove the nail through the plank, and, testing the stability of the hold with a good shake, knew that the doghouse was finally complete. Accomplishment washed over him. He patted the splinters off his overalls, now excited to show Bane. To give Bane a piece of himself.
He stretched out his back, arms bent onto his hips, and circled the doghouse once more for good measure. He was satisfied. “Nailed it,” he said, and he chuckled to himself.
From that day, Bane and he were two years apart. Hikaru sat by the edge of the clubhouse, huddling his arms over his chest. Bane was dashing about, kicking sand all over the place, tackling Shudoh with a huge grin on his face. Fourteen seemed impossibly far away. Bane and Shudoh raced into the sea, and when Icchan tapped Hikaru on the shoulder - the presents were ready - looking back, he couldn’t see them at all.
But Bane emerged from the sea, only asking for a towel after pulling Hikaru into a headlock and soaking him in solidarity. And when Bane laughed, it was hard not to laugh with him. He looked Hikaru dead in the eye and, cackling, flung the towel at his face. What’s the point of being anxious, Bane was never going to grow up. Hikaru pulled the towel down around his neck, and with a solemn look he said,
"Well, that upset me, Bane-san. But luckily I’ve dried my eyes." He rubbed the towel over his face for effect.
"You’re telling that kind of boring gag on my birthday?" Bane shoved Hikaru’s shoulder, but he never stopped grinning.
"Oh, does it rub you up the wrong way?"
"Okay, stop there," Icchan said, "before the food gets as cold as Amane’s jokes."
They waved goodbye against the glare of the sunset. A cold sensation settled in Hikaru’s stomach to see their friends departing, and although Bane chattered on in his usual way, Hikaru couldn’t focus on the conversation. When they neared the familiar corner, with the flickering lamppost and the stop sign, that parted the way between Bane’s house and his, Hikaru felt his chest tighten. Crunch time.
"Ah," Bane interrupted himself, realising where they were. "You wanna come to ours for a bit?"
"Um, it’s a bit of a detour but," Hikaru looked intently at his shoes, "would you mind coming to my house first?" He drew a breath. "I have… a present for you…"
Bane said nothing. Hikaru raised his gaze, only to see Bane beaming back at him. “Dude!!” He said, aiming a soft punch at Hikaru’s shoulder that very nearly floored him. As they passed through the gate that led into Hikaru’s yard, Bane said, “I’m so pumped!” and laughed under his breath.
They stood in front of the conspicuous tarp for a few moments. Hikaru gestured at it, muttering, “Happy birthday.” Bane bounced over to the tarp. He tugged at the corners, and with an air of ceremony and great relish, he unveiled the doghouse. Hikaru said quickly, “I-it’ll be cold this year they said, and I thought Ricky might need more space, since…”
Bane’s arms were around his shoulders, pulling him into a hug. He fell silent. He saw that Bane had to crouch slightly in order to hug him properly, the friendliness frustrated him, but he closed his eyes and clung onto Bane’s coat. “Thanks, man,” Bane said in a quiet voice. And Hikaru felt him start to pull away, and his fingers trembled, but he wouldn’t let go. A second longer, a second longer, but his resolve fought against him and he pulled back. Now he could see Bane’s face, see the warm smile that still greeted him, his heart thudded so heavily he heard it in his ears and the ground felt so uncertain.
If he fell over right now he could say, Bane-san, I’ve fallen for you, and it would be amazing comical timing.
"So not to change the subject," Bane said, despite the fact that Hikaru had not said a word for some time, "if this is my present, what did you get for Sae?"
Hikaru raised a hand to his mouth. “Ah!”
"That’s what I thought!" Bane laughed and slapped Hikaru’s shoulder. "It’s okay, though, I found something that can be from the both of us." Hikaru felt a rare moment of calm in the pit of his stomach, and Bane rushed back to the doghouse, sticking his head into the entrance. "It’s never going to beat this though, holy crap!" And Hikaru snickered, chewing at his lip to suppress his grin.