Chapter Text
Crazy Little Voices
“Casey! Casey! Report! Report!”
He could hear Boden calling for him over the radio, but it was as if his shouts were moving further and further away. It wasn't because Boden had stopped screaming after his Captain at the top of his lungs, but rather his body slipping out of consciousness in a bid to protect itself.
They were only 5 minutes into their shift at 51 when they received a call to a restaurant fire a few blocks away. A soufflé making session had gone wrong and somehow set the whole place alight. The fire spread more rapidly than anticipated, and while he and Severide were helping two victims, they heard some alarming creaking coming from the ceiling. From there, it happened so fast. He’d reacted and pushed the two victims towards Severide before the roof came down in between them. All Casey now knew was that his oxygen was out, there was no way to get to him and he was slowly losing consciousness.
He managed to sit himself up against one of the still standing cabinets in the restaurant kitchen. He groggily looked ahead of him, hoping and praying that he would see one of his men charging through and getting him out – but nothing. He couldn’t see anything through the smoke.
He closed his eyes for a brief moment, hoping that this nightmare would end. A part of him thought it seemed fitting that he would go out like this, but another part of him knew that it wasn’t his time. It shouldn’t be his time. There was still so much he hadn’t done and so much life left to live and love.
He opened his eyes, although only slightly, his body starting to fatigue and shut down. Through his squint, however, he saw something. He saw a glimmer that he knew had to be a dream, but in that moment she was as clear as day, her blonde hair flowing down her shoulders, her bright blue eyes piercing through the smoke. She was as pretty as he’d always remembered her. The image of her that always stuck in his brain was of her on the day they met when they were 18 years old. To him, she was an angel.
She appeared to be coming closer towards him, but he knew it had to be a dream. She was in a summer dress, her favourite one to be exact – and she still looked 18, an age they definitely weren't anymore, no matter how much they wished they were.
“Sylvie?” he questioned in a whisper, before his body gave up and he passed out onto the floor.
“Sylvie?”
Sylvie jolted awake from where she sat asleep in the car, her head resting against the window. She took a minute to get her bearings. She hadn’t even realised how tired she was until now. She turned her head to look at the person driving the car, soon remembering who she was with and where they were going. Her parents threw an annual garden party at their farm and they were on their way there. The Bretts were one of the wealthiest and most well-known families in the community. This garden party was one of the most exciting things to happen in their small town all year, but to Sylvie, it was just another instance of pomp and circumstance that she didn't want to be a part of.
Her husband Harrison was driving their SUV at an annoyingly fast rate. They were really in no rush to get there in her mind, but to Harrison, it was another opportunity to show off and talk himself up to all of Sylvie’s parents’ friends.
Harrison briefly glanced at his wife of 6 years; “You ok?”
“Yeah, I uh – did you just say my name?” she asked, remembering what had woken her up in the first place.
Harrison shook his head. “Must have been a dream.” He replied.
Sylvie looked out head of her with furrowed brows. “Yeah… must have been.” She knew she was probably overthinking the situation, but it just felt strange. She knew that voice, that voice sounded like – it was just a dream Sylvie - she told herself quickly. He was someone important to her, of course she would remember his voice and it was only natural that he would pop up in her head every now and again, but it didn't mean anything... right?
“You might want to fix your hair—” Harrison began as he reached his hand out to touch it and she immediately flinched, a movement that didn’t go unnoticed by him. He clenched his jaw and moved his hand, tightening his hold around the steering wheel as Sylvie lowered the sun visor to look in the mirror attached. She didn’t need or want him touching her – not now, not ever.
Soon enough, they had pulled into her parents’ drive where the party was already in full swing. As Harrison turned off the ignition, Sylvie moved to get out of the car, but Harrison was quickly to grab her and stop her.
“Sylvie. We’re at your parent’s house. Try not to make a scene.” He warned, his grip tightening around her arm as Sylvie tried to not let the discomfort show on her face. She merely nodded her head as he released her arm. She slowly moved to get out of the car this time. By the time she had walked around it to Harrison, he was already smiling and charmingly greeting people as they walked by.
He turned his smile to his wife, before resting his hand on the small of her back. “Let’s go honey” he said happily as Sylvie forced a smile onto her lips and let him lead her into her own childhood home.
As they walked through the front door, Sylvie was unbelievably relieved that the first face she saw was her best friend Hope’s. Hope smiled and waved lightly at her, excusing herself from the couple she was talking to.
“Hey Syl!” she greeted as she hugged her friend. After she released her, she turned to Harrison with her lips pursed. “Harrison.” She said through her teeth. Hope hated Harrison. She always had. She always thought Sylvie had settled for him, despite how much her parents loved the man. They couldn’t see past the façade he put on in public – but Hope could. She could see the light that had left Sylvie’s eyes over the years.
“Hope. I didn’t realise you would be here.” Harrison said as he straightened his suit jacket.
Hope gave him an insincere smile, “I’m Sylvie’s best friend of course I’m going to be here.” Hope looked at Sylvie who was beginning to shift uncomfortably where she stood. Her facial expression softened at her friend. She didn’t want to make life any more difficult to Sylvie. If Hope acted up to Harrison, Harrison would in turn act up to Sylvie.
Sylvie felt Harrison’s grip around her waist tighten. “We should go and say hello to your parents.” He suggested as Sylvie nodded her head.
“Yeah, let’s go.” Sylvie replied quietly. “I’ll catch up with you later” she promised her friend as she reluctantly stepped aside and let them go, her eyes not missing the tightness of Harrison’s grip around her waist.
“I have to say Captain Casey – I’ve never seen anything like this in my years as a doctor.” Connor Rhodes told him as Matt sat in the ER of Chicago Med. “You were in there without oxygen for quite a while and you inhaled a significant amount of smoke, but there’s little to no damage to your lungs.”
Matt shrugged; “I kept low to the ground, that probably helped.” He replied. He knew that it probably wasn’t as simple as that, but he didn’t know how else to explain it. Dr. Rhodes was right to be stunned by his recovery.
51 managed to break through the rubble and get to Casey a short while after he had passed out. They got him out of there and somehow as soon as Foster went to intubate, he woke up, completely startled. He was coughing and it was clear that his lungs were damaged, but he was breathing on his own. It was nothing short of a remarkable miracle. They got him to the ER and Dr. Rhodes confirmed that there was some damage, but it was minimal. He was breathing on his own just fine. He’d just have to take care of himself for the next little while and take some time off work but based on his examination there was no reason why he shouldn’t be fighting fit again soon.
“Maybe. I don’t know how to explain it, it’s remarkable.” Dr. Rhodes told him. “I’m happy enough to let you go, your lungs sound good and I think we can trust you to get to the ER if something doesn’t feel right.”
“Yeah, I’ll be ok.” Matt replied. He wasn’t sure that was entirely true. He was physically fine, but mentally – he couldn’t quite get over what he saw in that fire. He saw her. He figured it was some sort of oxygen deprived hallucination, but it just felt so real. It felt like if he’d just reached out, he would feel her.
“Ok” Dr. Rhodes said breaking him out of his trance. “I’ll let you get going, I believe there are some people waiting out there to see you." He said with a small smile as Matt thanked him.
Once Dr. Rhodes had left, he slipped on the clean t-shirt and sweatpants the guys on truck had brought him from the station. He collected his phone and his keys and left the ER bay, ready to see his 51 family.
“You took a hell of a beating out there Casey.” He heard a voice behind him say as he turned around to face his best friend of over 20 years Kelly Severide.
“Tell me about it…” Matt grumbled as he ran a hand over his head.
“I’m glad you’re ok man” he said sincerely as he shook Matt’s hand. They’d never been particularly affectionate and soppy with each other, so this was about as close as it was going to get. “What the hell happened out there anyway?”
“I don’t know, the roof just came in—”
“No, I know that. I mean – how did you get out of there alive? Foster didn’t even need to intubate you. It’s a frickin miracle that you’re walking around here man.” Severide said with a laugh of disbelief.
Matt looked at his feet and gulped. How could he explain to his best friend that he was fairly convinced the reason he survived was because of a hallucination he had of Sylvie Brett? The same Sylvie Brett that he hadn’t seen in 15 years.
“I don’t know man. It was just one of those things. We’ll put it down to luck” he decided to simply explain.
Kelly eyed Matt curiously. He knew his best friend like the back of his hand. Something wasn't sitting right. "What aren't you telling me Casey?" he inquired.
"... Don't worry about it." Matt simply replied as he patted Severide on the arm.
Matt turned around just as the doors into the waiting room opened and Stella appeared, a little girl running in front of her, her brunette ringlets bouncing all around her shoulders.
“Uncle Matt!” the little girl explained as she ran to him. Matt bent down and caught her as she launched herself at him.
"Wow, easy Abby, Uncle Casey had a bit of a rough day on the job." Stella explained to her daughter as she ran her hand over Abby's hair. Abigail Severide was a bright, bubbly 5 year old. She had a real zest for life and Matt was incredibly thankful that he had her in his life. Abigail, Severide and Stella were the only real family he had ever known and even on his worst days, his surrogate niece managed to put a smile on his face.
“Are you ok?” Abby whispered quietly to her uncle.
Matt nodded, “I’m ok, don’t worry about me.” He assured her as he kissed her head and pulled away from the hug.
"You ok cap?" Stella asked. She knew he would never admit it in front of Abigail, but she figured he was a lot more shaken by this than he'd ever let on.
Matt nodded and sent her a discrete wink before turning back to Abigail. "Fireman's lift?" he asked as Abby cheered and Matt lifted her up and playfully threw her over his shoulder, eliciting wild giggles from the little girl.
As Matt walked on with Abby, Stella and Severide held back, watching him go forward. "Is he really ok?" Stella asked her husband.
Kelly sighed and shoved his hands in his pockets; "I have no idea."
Matt paused briefly when he got to the front door of the hospital. He had a feeling that as soon as he stepped out of the hospital doors, his life was going to alter in unimaginable ways. It seemed like a crazy thing to say, but it was true. He knew that hallucination had to mean something.
The Brett’s garden party was still in full swing well into the evening. Sylvie had largely kept to herself. She made polite conversation with her parent’s friends and watched as Harrison charmed every person in the room. It made her skin crawl. She felt so powerless in doing something about his deception. He certainly was not the man that he claimed to be and only Sylvie and Hope could see it.
She felt someone lightly touch her arm and she jumped out of her skin.
“Wow, wow, it’s just me.” Hope said quickly. “I’m sorry, I should have said something before, I didn’t mean to scare you—”
“No, no, you didn’t I was just in a little bubble.” Sylvie explained with a small smile. Sylvie always amazed Hope. Even in her own desperation, she always managed to make the people around her feel better about themselves. The light in her eyes may have dimmed, but her optimism and goodness was ingrained in her soul.
“Let’s go for a walk” Hope said as she motioned her head forwards towards the end of the Brett’s extensive piece of land.
Sylvie nodded courtly, “Sure”
Hope linked her arm through her friend’s and pulled her along beside her. The Brett’s piece of land sat at the edge of a lake. Sylvie used to play down here all the time as a child. She was particularly fond of the wooden gazebo that sat hidden from the view of the house and down a discreet path. She was fairly certain that over the years her parents had entirely forgotten it was there – but she hadn’t. She could never forget it. Not when she had so many special memories from there. So many special memories of time spent there with him.
“How are you doing Sylvie?” Hope asked as they sat on the double swing hanging from the huge oak tree.
Sylvie nodded, “I’m good…” she lied. She knew Hope could probably see right through her, so what was even the point? “Harrison wants me to stop working at the fire house.” She added. She was begging Hope would read between the lines because Sylvie wasn’t sure she could explain truly how she felt about it without breaking down into tears. Tears that Harrison would no doubt view as weakness. “I’m reluctant to agree but for both of our sanities, maybe it’s for the best.” She said with a shrug.
The old Sylvie Brett never would have given up her job for a man. The old Sylvie Brett would never have gotten sucked into a life with a man who couldn’t respect what she did. She loved her job. All she had ever wanted to do in life was help people and being a paramedic allowed her to do that. It also gave her the adrenaline rush that she so craved from life. It made her feel alive, it reminded her that she wasn’t drowning, even though it all too often felt like she was.
“Sylvie – I can’t watch you go through this anymore.” Hope said as she stood from the swing.
“Go through what?” Sylvie asked with a gulp. She knew exactly what Hope was talking about, but she was waiting for her friend to say it out loud. Maybe if Hope could say it, she could be honest too.
“I have watched that man chip away at you for the past 8 years and I won’t do it anymore. I can’t do it.” Hope said as she crossed her arms over her chest and shook her head. “He is abusive. Sure, he doesn’t hit you but it’s like psychological warfare with him. He is constantly dragging you down, constantly making you feel like you aren’t capable all because his ego can’t handle having such a brilliant wife.” Sylvie looked at her feet. She didn’t feel so brilliant. She hadn’t felt brilliant in a long time. “I have been a shitty friend not to have said something sooner and I will be forever sorry for that – but you can’t do this anymore. You deserve the world and you deserve to have your dream job and you deserve to not have someone grab you and drag you around like a doll.”
Sylvie shook her head, “Hope I hear you. Believe me I hear you. But I am in too deep. I married him, I have a life with him, my parents love him. You’re asking me to completely strip away every part of me—”
“No. I’m asking you to strip away him and let yourself be free. To let every part of you flourish.” Hope told her. “I’m not saying that it’s going to be easy, but I am saying that I will be with you every step of the way.” Sylvie remained quiet, not sure how to respond to her friend’s words. “You have got to get out of this damn town Sylvie. Every good memory you have of this place is being ruined by him and I won’t let it happen anymore.”
“What do you suggest I do, Hope?” Sylvie asked as she stood up and raised her arms. “I have nowhere else to go!”
Hope reached into her pocket and lifted out a set of keys before throwing them at Sylvie. “My dad bought this old car to fix up. It’s a piece of shit, it was just a project for him but it works. He couldn’t sell it so he handed it off to me. At first I was so mad but then I realised – this is perfect. This is what you need.”
“I need a shitty car?”
“You need a shitty getaway car.” Hope clarified.
“Where am I going to get away to?”
“Anywhere!” Hope said with a smile and a little laugh. “You can go wherever the hell you choose. Just drive Sylvie. Take a leap of faith. Drive and trust that the universe will watch your back.”
“Sylvie!”
Sylvie turned her head to where she heard shouting in the distance. She squinted her eyes and saw Harrison standing there. He was clearly looking around for her but couldn’t see her.
“Sylvie! You gotta come see this, your mom organised a clown for the kids you’re going to love it!” he shouted, hoping that she would hear from wherever she was.
Sylvie narrowed her eyes and clenched her jaw.
“Asshole doesn’t even know I hate clowns…” she grumbled as Hope scoffed in amusement.
Sylvie looked at the keys in her hands. It seemed like the craziest thing in the world to just pack up and drive – but maybe this was the opportunity she had been looking for. It also seemed ridiculous that the thing that pushed her over the edge was Harrison thinking she would enjoy seeing a clown. It really sealed his fate.
“You did try to tell me.” Sylvie said quietly as Hope frowned, not understanding what she was trying to say. “You tried to tell me when you first met him, or when we got engaged or on our wedding day – I just didn’t listen.” Sylvie clarified. She had heard Hope’s protests loud and clear. Granted none of them had been as vocal as this, but she knew how Hope felt. It was written all over her face. “Thank you for giving me that push now.”
Hope’s face brightened. “You’re going?” she asked in quiet disbelief.
Sylvie nodded her head. “Hell yeah.”
Sylvie had no idea what came over her. She probably wasn’t giving herself enough credit in this moment, but she also knew it was something else. A crazy as it sounded, she knew it was the voice that said her name. His voice. Just hearing it one time gave her all the courage she needed to go. She just needed Hope’s help to make her see it clearly.
“Where are you going to go?” Hope asked as Sylvie began to rush down the back path so she wouldn’t have to go through the house.
Sylvie stopped briefly and turned back so her friend with the smallest of smiles on her face.
“Chicago.”