Chapter Text
#1
Feb 11: Dragon
May 11: Secrets
“Katara… is something bothering you?” Zuko asked carefully over their lunch. While training earlier with Aang he had noticed that if she hadn’t been looking bored, she had a slight frown on her face. It hadn’t been entirely different from her disapproving looks of their little group welcoming him at the air temple. Naturally, it had him worried. Only yesterday had she forgiven him. Maybe spending a night at the Fire Lord’s beach house renewed her anger at the Fire Nation and at him?
“Huh, what do you mean?”
Zuko debated with himself whether to let out that she looked like something was bothering her. Katara hated when other people made assumptions. But if there really was something, he shouldn’t be making her mad even more, right? Besides, Aang wasn’t around to act as peacemaker since Toph had dragged him out to the shore to practice sandbending. Sokka and Suki were nowhere to be found after they had quickly finished their lunch and if Zuko was being honest, he didn’t want to know what they were getting up to.
Another point of contention was whether to let out that he had been in fact sneaking glances at Katara.
He must have been overthinking for a while, because Katara volunteered the information herself. “I’ve been feeling jealous, I think? Of you and Aang. Since the two of you returned from the Sun Warriors.”
Katara sounded reluctant but shared her thoughts anyway. No, she’s not taking back her forgiveness at least. But Zuko’s breath of relief is short. It seemed she’d been harbouring a secret jealousy for days now. However, what was she jealous of? Firebending?
“Actually, of Toph, too.”
Not Firebending then.
“What about?”
“Your bending. You and Aang got to face dragons, Zuko. Based on your stories, their fire was a beautiful thing to see. Life-giving, life-affirming.”
“It really was.”
“Same with Toph. You know how she got her life back and on track once she learned from the badgermoles. And Aang, Appa has been with him all his life. I’m just jealous that you all got to experience something so meaningful with the original benders of your element.”
“Katara, it’s not like you can come up to the moon and ask it to teach you how to bend. I know the moon’s Sokka’s ex-girlfriend – kind of? – but there’s really no way to have the moon teach you Waterbending.”
“Don’t you think I know that?” she answered a little too harshly. “That’s why I was initially reluctant to say. Because it’s stupid of me to want the moon as my teacher.”
“But you’ve had great teachers anyway, right?”
“You could say that…” she said quietly.
Then he remembered what she had done to the commander of the Southern Raiders. He recalled being shocked and then being scared. But he had also noticed her tears when they left the navy ship. He hadn’t been able to ask about anything because she was being quiet, on their way to Yon Rha’s home and then to Ember Island.
“This is not about the dragons and the moon, is it?” She looked him directly in the eyes this time. Tears were beginning to well in her eyes. “That day on Whaletail, what exactly did you do?”
“The others must’ve kept it from you then? I guess it’s my story to tell… It’s called bloodbending. I learned it from a “great” teacher, as you put it. Her name is Hama, one of the last Waterbenders caught and imprisoned from the Fire Nation raids on the Southern Tribe.” She continued the rest of Hama’s tale and their encounter with her in a Fire Nation village.
“I just thought it unfair, that the rest of you got to meet teachers that breathed new life to your bending… while I got a vengeful woman out to get innocent villagers. That she taught me something I think should be forbidden. The first time I did it, on her, I felt fully in control and I liked it. Of course I did, because it kept Aang and Sokka safe. But no one should ever have that kind of control over another person.”
“I’m sorry, I shouldn't have pried.”
“But you're wondering, why I used it on the navy captain.” Zuko nodded. “I think you’d do the same if you had the ability and you’re facing your mother’s murderer. I wanted him to confess to his sin and pay for taking my mother’s life and giving my family so much grief.”
Her bold assessment of him surprised Zuko. He hadn’t brought up his mother to them yet but they must have heard rumours that Ursa had been “disposed of.” While her assumption about his mother's disappearance was wrong, Katara was right about his theoretical actions, so he conceded to her point.
“You’re right. And I would’ve regretted it too the way you do now. You do, right, regret it?”
“I do,” she said quietly. “He was the wrong guy. And even if it was Yon Rha himself, I would’ve regretted it too! I don't think anybody would appreciate losing control of their own body. I know I wouldn't.”
An idea started to form in his mind. “Then let me act like the dragons, yeah?”
She looked at him confused. Honestly, he’s not confident in his sudden and half-formed bright idea either.
“It won’t be as magical as what Ran and Shaw did for me and Aang but I’d like to show you another side of your bloodbending. You see, the Fire Nation has a lot of field hospitals and many trained medical professionals – because of the war, unfortunately. They don’t heal the same way Waterbenders or Earth Kingdom herbalists do. If I remember correctly, they start treatments by tracing chi and blood flow. When this is all over, if you’d like, I can take you to them?”
“That sounds like a good idea. Thank you, Zuko.”