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She just kept talking and I just kept packing. "Tepsu," she says, "they's gone, and you can't do nothing about it. Now get back into bed before you get real sick." But I didn't say nothing, and put the last of my stuff in my pack and put it on and got my weapons and went to go, but Chiga was standing so I couldn't get out.
"Move, Chiga. I gotta go find him," I said, trying to sound real mean but just sounding real cute and squeaky.
She got down on her knees so she could look me in the eye. They is always doing that, 'cause I is so little and I think it makes 'em feel bigger than they is. "Now, Tepsu, we all know how you feel. There was seven good men on that hunt, and they's got wives and even kids that'll miss 'em terrible, but they is gone and they ain't coming back. You is still feeling bad from that fever, and you can't think good. Just lay down and you'll be all better come morning."
I was trying not to get mad, 'cause she'd only think it was cute, and trying to stay real calm I said, "Chiga, there was eight good men on that hunt. Cav was a better man than any of 'em."
She smiled. "Of course he was, dear." But she didn't move.
"Chiga," I says again, and I was getting real mad, "move outta my way. I gotta go find Cav and ain't no one gonna stop me. Cav's all I got, and I'll hurt anyone who tries to stop me."
She just laughed at that. She laughed 'cause it was so cute that a little nothing like me could think she could hurt her. I just couldn't stop I was so mad and I slapped her hard. "You shut up!" I shouted. "You don't know nothing. Don't none of you know nothing. You ain't never treated me and Cav right just 'case we was little. We can't help how we was born, and we can't help that we never growed much, but we is good people and you never treated us right. You is always patting us on the head like it makes you feel better than us by treating us so bad."
I stopped and she was just looking real surprised, and I kept talking but less mad now. "Look, Chiga, I know that we coulda been treated worse, and I know that there was some that wanted to kill us when we was born, and the Spiritman said, 'No, I saw good signs, don't kill 'em', but nothing's really any better. It was okay when we was kids, but we ain't kids no more and hasn't been for a long time, but none of you know that. We didn't grow much on the outside, but we is real big on the inside, bigger than you, bigger than all of you. Cav and me got together 'cause you can't see that we is growed-up and we needs people and I is so glad he was here, too, 'cause without him I woulda been alone. You all treated us like kids, or not kids but little dogs, but Cav was the only one that treated me like people, and I know he's the only one of you that's good. And there ain't nothing that's going to keep me away from him."
She stood, all quiet like, and I knew what was coming. "Now, Tepsu," she said, real mad, "you is sick from the fever so I'll just try and remember that, but that don't give you no call to go shouting at me and hitting me. I don't know what's wrong with you. You were such a happy little girl before and I'm sorry your little friend is gone, but right is right and wrong is wrong, and hitting me was wrong. Now you go back and lay down right now or I'll get my brothers and we'll tie you down if we have to. It's for your own good."
There wasn't nothing I could do. They was all bigger and stronger than me. But I was smarter. I would go back to bed but only for now. But first, I said, "I ain't no little girl, Chiga. I helped take care of you when you was littler than me. And Cav ain't my little friend; he's my husband. And he's the best husband ever."
She said some other dumb things, but I didn't even listen. I just went back to lay down and wait. 'Cause they couldn't keep me away from Cav. Like I said, they was real dumb. It was like me and Cav, 'cause we was only half as big, was twice as smart. We used to laugh at how dumb the others was, which wasn't no better then them laughing at how little we was, but it made us feel good. Thinking about Cav again made me real sad, and I started to cry for a little bit.
I didn't take nothing out of my pack. I waited for the sun to go down. They all sat around the fire and moaned and groaned about the hunters that was gone and probably dead by some lion or something. None of them cried for Cav, but I did.
They drank lots of the special drink that the Spiritman made for times like this, and they all fell asleep. I waited until the moon went down and put on my pack, and got my knife, and my club, and my bow, and my arrows, and my pouch of hunting poison. I cut a hole in the wall and went out. I probably coulda just walked out the front, but there was no reason to be dumb about it. I knew that I could walk real far before they found me, and when they got up they would feel real bad 'cause the drink always does that and their head would hurt and they wouldn't want to come after me. They'd probably just say, "The dumb little girl went away and got eaten by lions. It was just a little girl. Who cares," and forget about me and Cav.
I had hunted and night some, but only when the moon was up. It was real dark, darker than I thought. Especially when I got into the jungle and there wasn't even no stars could shine through all the leaves. I felt my way real deep in the jungle, then made a torch and lit it with the flint I had. They woulda been real surprised that I had flint and could use it good. I had taken it from one of the other hunters, 'cause maybe I'd need it someday, and I was right 'cause I needed it right then.
I got this torch lit and looked around until I found their trail. I was a good tracker, and they wasn't trying to hide, and there was eight of them, so it was real easy to follow the trail. I made real good time and had gone real far when the sun came up and I could put out my torch. I rested some, 'cause I hadn't got no sleep that night and I really was sick.
I thought about Cav. I really had got lucky to find him. I don't think I coulda lived without him, or him without me. The others was okay to us, giving us food and a place to live even though our parents was dead and we was different. It was strange about me and Cav. We was both born the same day, both our moms died birthing us, both our dads was killed just before we was born. The people took care of us, but never let us grow up. Cav and I got together and helped each other. When I got sad, he'd make me happy. When he got mad at the others, I got him calm. We was real good for each other.
The Spiritman wasn't so bad. He wasn't dumb like the others and he treated us good. He gave us bows and taught us to hunt. The others let us come when they hunted, but just so they could laugh at us. But we didn't mind them laughing 'cause we was the best hunters. They never said so. They always told the rest that they had killed all the game, but they kept taking us. Said we was good luck. With so many hunters gone now, especially me and Cav, they'd be hungry. I didn't wish nothing bad on them even though they wasn't always so nice and I hoped they would be okay.
I guess I was tireder than I thought, 'cause I went to sleep and when I woke up someone was grabbing my arms and holding me down. I fought but he was strong and I heard, "Don't fight, Tepsu. We is just trying to help."
I looked and it was Chiga and her two ugly brothers. I was real mad at me for falling asleep. It was real stupid but it was too late now. I fought real hard and shouted some words that I ain't supposed to know but all that did is make 'em mad and she said, "She must be real sick with the fever and maybe we better tie her up so she won't hurt herself." So they found some vines and tied me up real tight so my wrists and ankles hurt and even put some leather in my mouth so I couldn't bite and say bad things no more.
The really ugly brother put me over his shoulder and they started back home. I was real mad now and kept thinking the real bad things that I couldn't say now, but I was real tired and sick and real sad 'cause I'd never find Cav now, and with Cav gone there wasn't really any me anymore, and I wished that they'd just kill me but I wasn't going to cry like a little girl, so I just stayed real quiet while they carried me back.
When we got back, everyone was running around and asking things and Chiga kept saying, "She's real sick with fever. We got to get her to the Spiritman." So we all went to the Spiritman's hut, me and them and most of the people, and Chiga called him out and told him what was wrong. He said to the really ugly brother, "Put her down," and he dropped me kinda rough on the ground. Then he said, "Untie her," and the really ugly brother pulled out his knife and cut the vines, but I was ready and grabbed his arm and pulled the leather out my mouth and bit his wrist real hard and he yelled and dropped the knife and jumped back.
I grabbed the knife real quick and jumped up and spun around so none of 'em could sneak up on me, and just shouted they should stay away and I wasn't going to let them keep me from Cav. They was all real mad and yelling and all, but they all thought I was crazy with the fever and stayed away. Chiga said, "Maybe it ain't the fever, maybe it's bad spirits. Spiritman, can't you help her none?"
The Spiritman came close, but not too close 'cause I had a knife, and he started talking real calm and said, "Tepsu, no one's gonna hurt you. Put down the knife. You is real sick with sickness, and real sick with sadness about Cav, and I knows that, but you can't go 'round hurting people. Cav is gone and the others is gone and there ain't nothing we can do. We lost enough hunters, we can't lose no more."
My head was all jumbled 'cause I kinda knew he was right and all but I really couldn't live without Cav, but Spiritman had always treated us good and even if the others was mean, he never was, and he wasn't never wrong. I was just about to drop the knife when he smiles and says, "I got special stuff that'll make you forget all about Cav and be real happy again. Now give me the knife."
He comes forward and I was so mad about what he said about forgetting Cav that I gave him the knife okay, blade first. He jumped back and they all gasped and he just looked at his hand and the cut there and the blood coming out and everyone got real quiet. He looked real surprised then real mad. He looked at me and said, "Maybe you is sick, and maybe you is sad, and maybe you even got spirits, but there ain't nothing worse'n cutting the Spiritman, and there ain't no reason for it. You did it, and not 'cause of bad spirits or nothing, but 'cause you is bad. People don't cut the Spiritman so you ain't people. You is an animal, and we don't have no animals here. You ain't of the people no more." And he turns his back on me.
The others didn't do nothing, then Chiga and her brothers turned their backs on me too. I couldn't even move 'cause I knew he was right and I knew I had done real bad. A couple other turned their back then more then more then all of them was standing there with their backs to me. And the Spiritman said, "Go home. There ain't no problem here 'cause this animal is going. She ain't gonna come back, neither, 'cause she knows if we finds any animal here, we'll kill it 'cause this is a place for people not animals. Go home now."
I still couldn't move. They all started walking away, and all I could do was look as they did. I was real sorry but there wasn't nothing I could do. They never even looked at me and soon the only people there was me with my bloody knife, and the Spiritman still with his back to me. I was gonna leave when he turns back to me, sits down, and says, "I saw sign on the day you was born."
My head was jumbled again. I says, "You ain't supposed to talk to me. I ain't people."
He shrugs and opens a pouch from his belt and starts putting some stuff on his cut hand. "It ain't important. The Spiritmaster makes law. He can break law. I knew this was gonna happen. It had to."
He was quiet and I couldn't talk 'cause my head was jumbled, and then he starts talking again. "On the day you was born I saw sign. It told me someone important was born, but I wasn't sure if it was you or Cav. I still ain't but one of you, maybe both, is going to do great things. You can't do no great things here. You gotta go to the rest of the world. Cav has, I think, and now you gotta follow."
"But there ain't no rest of the world," I said. "There is just the jungle and the jungle goes to the edge of the world."
He finished with his hand and looked at me. "You ever been to the edge of the world?" he asked. He knew I hadn't done no such thing but I shook my head anyways. "Know anyone who has?" he asked.
I nodded and said, "You."
He nodded back and said, "And you know what's there? I saw water there. Big water as far as I could look. But it ain't normal water. It tastes like sweat. But that's only towards where the sun comes from. I went the other way and I never found the edge of the world, but I did find this." He reached into a pocket and handed me something.
I looked at it and it looked kinda like an arrowhead, but it wasn't like no arrowhead I had never seen. It was shaped funny and was too big and it had something painted on it I didn't know. "I know the people," he said, "and that wasn't never made by us. But it was made by someone."
I stared at the arrowhead. That didn't make no sense. "You mean," I whispered, "there is other people?"
He nodded. "We ain't the only people. Maybe the world's got lots of people groups. Maybe even as many as you got fingers. And I don't think the world is as small as we people think. From what I seen, the world's gotta be big, maybe as big as six months' travel from one end to the other."
I couldn't answer him. His words were too big to fit in my head. The world was a whole new place for me now.
"Your hunt ain't here," he said, "it's out there in this big world with those other peoples. You gotta find something out there. That's why I let you cut me. You gotta leave here and never come back. You is too big for these little people."
We was silent until I says, "But where does I start?"
"With Cav. Find him and then find where you need to be. Only you will know the trail." He stood, came over to me, and kneeled down so he could hug me. "You have to leave now. I will miss you, Tepsu," he said and then went back into his hut.
I stood there for a real long time, not knowing what to do, but then I thought that Cav might need me and I shouldn't wait no more. I looked down at the knife that was in my hand and gasped. The Spiritman's blood had marked the flint in a funny pattern. I touched the edge and it was real sharp now, sharper than anything. I put it in my belt careful. I got my other stuff and turned my back on the Spiritman's hut. Now, it was time to find my husband.