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Tatiana had one thing she enjoyed besides teaching and spending time with her wife. She had access to the Mirror of Erised and the amount of times she used it was probably unhealthy. After all, when a person died, you were supposed to get over it. Mourn then move on. Tatiana did not.
Those words didn’t mean anything when it came to Tom and Becky.
She and Becky had been friends since their first year, and Tom even before then. There had been a time at Hogwarts when they were Tatiana’s only friends. She’d even convinced Becky to name her first girl after her. She didn’t think she’d go for it, but when Becky showed her a little name for a girl with her name first, her heart swelled with love for her friend.
Tatiana had thought she would spend the rest of her life going to birthday parties and weddings and little elementary Muggle school events with Tom and Becky. She never once had the notion that she would have to attend their funerals, holding their new son in her arms before having to give him to some asshole Muggle man that she hated with all of her heart.
Perhaps that was why she begged Tootsie to go get him, to save him, since she assumed that man was terrible for Paul.
She was correct, of course. She always was. Barbara had always said so. So had Becky. So had her test results in school. So, begrudgingly, had Tom. Just this one time, Tatiana wished she had been wrong.
Paul reminded her of Becky and Tom. He had Tom’s messy hair but Becky’s eyes. He was short and skinny, but she knew he’d grow more as he aged. He had a knack for learning but couldn’t resist cracking jokes and goofing off. He was a combination of her closest friends and it hurt to see it sometimes. They’d never see him like this.
Tatiana stood in the dungeons in front of the covered mirror. She’d done this before. She wasn’t supposed to but she hadn’t been able to resist the temptation. Saying hello and forgetting for a moment was the easiest thing in the world. Saying goodbye and facing reality was the hardest.
She pulled the cover off and took a deep breath, already wiping her eyes. Tom and Becky appeared before her. Becky’s red hair was always pulled up in a ponytail and her thick black glasses sat on her head. Tom’s hair was still messy and he, no matter what, had his arms wrapped around his love.
“Tati? Becky asked quietly, “What’s wrong? You’re all teary-eyed.” Fuck Becky for being so observant.
It didn’t matter. Their images would forget this conversation the moment she said goodbye, anyway.
“It’s nothing,” Tatiana reassured her.
“It’s not nothing.” Tom spoke up. He rested his chin on Becky’s shoulder, “What’s wrong?”
“Paul came to Hogwarts,” She told them, forcing a smile. “First day of classes today.”
“He’s eleven?” Tom nearly choked on his non-existent breath. “Holy shit, Tati, tell me everything, please.” He begged, wanting every last detail. Tati wiped a couple tears away and took a deep breath.
“He’s so much like the both of you, it’s insane,” Tati shook her head with a smile.
“What house?” Becky looked into her eyes and Tati bit her lip.
“Ravenclaw, like you, Becky.” She couldn’t hide a smile.
“Yes!” Becky cheered. She turned to her husband. “Guess I won that bet.”
“Oh, come on. Does he...have any interest in Quidditch?” Tom asked his question.
“He got himself stuck in a tree during the first flying lesson. His new friend had to help him out. She’s a Gryffindor. Real Quidditch talent. She’s on the Gryffindor team already. Youngest in over a century, Up’s been talking about her all day.”
“A girl?” Becky’s eyes twinkled and Tati just laughed. Her best friend was like that.
“Mhm, one of the Perkins’ kids. Her name’s Emma. Sweet little spitfire of a girl.” She described Emma like that. That’s how she would describe Becky.
“Already popular with the ladies,” Becky said, smiling up at her husband. “Just like you, Tom.”
“He’s made a couple friends too, and stuck up for one of them against Mini Spaceclaw.” She pinched the bridge of her nose at the thought of Junior.
“Spaceclaw has a kid?” Tom asked incredulously. “What poor woman….”
“I don’t know, but bless her heart for it. He’s a mini Spaceclaw. He used...that word…on one of your son’s friends.”
Becky looked outraged, looking up at the sky. “Just like his father.”
“Your son took a much more peaceful approach than you two. You should be very proud of him. He’s a kind kid already.”
“We are.” Becky said.
“We definitely are,” Tom echoed his wife.
“I wish he never went to Stanley.” She said softly, “If things were different, I would’ve taken him in so fast, Becky. He’s a skinny little thing.” She sighed, “Stanley definitely did not treat him well.”
“That mother-”
“Who’s he staying with now? He’s not going home for Christmas.” Tom cut his wife off.
“Tootsie and Mega-Girl. They still teach here. After all these years.” It felt good. It felt so good to just talk to her friends, to catch up and reminisce on old times, to be able to pretend everything had worked out in their favor.
“How’s Specs? Is she still around?” Becky’s eyes lit up again.
“Alive and well. She and Paul have bonded from what I’ve heard.”
“Good. That cat is a godsend.” Tati saw Becky look down at her hands, “Hey, Tat, do you...have any of those pictures…of Tommy and I?”
“I was already planning on showing him, B,” Tatiana assured her. “He’ll get those photos. They belong with him.”
“Who else is teaching now?” Tom asked, clearly curious.
“Oh, get this,” Tatiana couldn’t stop herself from laughing a little. Tom was going to hate it. If they had been discussing this over drinks, Tatiana wouldn’t have been able to stop laughing at Tom’s expression. “Owen Carvour’s the History of Magic Professor.”
“Owen Carvour, like, the school bully Owen Carvour? Worked for He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named?” Tom looked furious. “I should have turned him into a duck when I had the chance.”
“We can say his name-” Becky sighed, “The kid who worked for Von Nazi. He’s a teacher? He’s gonna give Paul hell!”
“I’m going to look out for him, Becky,” Tatiana promised, those ever-present tears returning, threatening to spill over once again. “I promised both of you that a long time ago.”
“I know you will,” Becky replied with a smile.
“Paul’s lucky to have someone like you looking out for him,” Tom said, squeezing Becky’s shoulder.
“It’s why you’re his godmother, Tat.” Becky said and Tati wiped away the now falling tears.
God, Tatiana, don’t start sobbing now.
“Hey, hey, Tat. We love you and miss you. We’re always here to talk when you need it.” Becky repeated the same thing she told her every time, even when they were back in school.
“Yeah, what she said,” Tom agreed. “Miss playing Quidditch with you, Slokhnvo.”
“Me too, Houston.” Tatiana remembered all the times on the streets, playing pickup Quidditch games with Tom and some of the neighbors. Tom had been the one to teach Tatiana to play. He’d been born a star player. Something in his genes made him fifty times better than the rest. But when he taught her, he’d never gotten impatient or angry, even at ten years old. In fact, he’d celebrated when she won her first match against him, saying that it meant he’d been a good teacher.
“Yeah, but I still won.” Tom smirked and Tati laughed.
“I did learn from the best, though.” She smiled, “Plus, I miss my Nurse Becky patching me up after I scuffed myself up playing Quidditch or getting into fights.”
Why did these conversations have to hurt so much.
The sound of the door opening above her made Tatiana start. She had to leave. If she was caught, she would lose her one way of still talking to Tom and Becky, and she couldn’t risk that.
“I have to go,” She told her friends mournfully.
“Yes, go,” Becky told her.
“Wouldn’t want you to get in trouble,” Tom joked, knowing full well that Tatiana had had no problem getting in trouble with him while they were in school. This one time, she couldn’t.
“Goodbye, Tom. Goodbye, Becky,” Tatiana gave her friends a little wave, her voice choked. “I’ll come back soon.”
“We’ll be here,” Tom replied, kissing his wife on the top of her head. “Tell Paul that Mom and Dad say hello.”
“I will.”
“We love you, Tati,” Becky said.
Tatiana picked up the sheet, and covered the mirror with it as the footsteps she’d heard earlier came closer and closer. Without looking back, she slipped out the back door of the room and made her way back up to Slytherin.
Tatiana just barely made it to her office and closed the door before she started bawling.