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Aziraphale, quite plainly, had had enough. She had sat quietly and let Gabriel and his friends tear into her with harsh eyes and harsh words, but she could not let them continue when she heard them switch topics.
"She's like a snake," Michael said haughtily, waving her fork over the bland salad in front of her. "Slithering around, trying to act so cool with her dark clothes and swishing hips. There's no way she hasn't slept with half the school."
"And those dark glasses," Uriel agreed. "She's probably on drugs."
"Well, she's definitely a lesbian," Sandy pointed out, clearly thinking he was adding something to the conversation.
"All good points." Gabriel leaned back in his chair. "At least she has terrible taste in partners. We wouldn't want someone worthwhile being seduced by the demon Crowley."
Aziraphale scowled, clenching her fists. She had half a mind to march up to them and tell them exactly what she thought of them. She had half a mind to throw a buttered roll at Gabriel's head. However, it was the other half of her mind that won, because she decided to sit and stew, instead.
"What's wrong, angel?" a gentle, vaguely amused voice asked from behind her as Crowley slid into the chair next to her. "Someone bend the corners of a book again?"
"No, although I wouldn't put it past them. Honestly, Crowley, I will never understand how people can completely lack any compassion for books. Or other people, for that matter." Aziraphale's rant was interrupted by the placement of a tie-dyed sugar cookie being placed on her plate. "Oh! How lovely, thank you, dear."
"Don't thank me. I only got them because they were so obnoxiously rainbow," Crowley admitted, grinning. "Stood right out in the middle of the boring ones."
"Yes, I'd imagine it-- Wait!" Aziraphale gave an excited wiggle in her seat. "That gives me the most marvelous idea. How would you like to cause some mischief?"
"You? Suggesting mischief? I'm surprised at you, angel." Nevertheless, Crowley leaned in closer. "What exactly did you have in mind?"
"Well, I was thinking we might nip down to the village and see what there might be in terms of tie-dye kits. After all, this is Gabriel's wash day. Don't want him to miss out on the fun."
"Oh, you absolutely wicked angel. Let's go."
~~
Each residence building had a room of combination washer-dryers in the basement. While there were no set rules on when they could be used and by whom, students generally fell into their own routines for laundry, and Aziraphale knew that Gabriel and his friends tended to each do a large load every second Monday in the four machines nearest the left wall.
If one newly tie-dyed and unrinsed sock just happened to find itself in each of those machines shortly after they were loaded, well, that would just be too bad, wouldn't it? And if that one sock was removed from each machine before the cycle was completed, well, there would be no real evidence of foul play, would there?
~~
The next day, Gabriel and his friends wore rainbow stains and scowls. Their smart, bland outfits were spotted with green, pink, blue, and orange, along with the occasional mix of colors that looked quite a bit like oil stains.
"What happened, Gabriel?" Michael hissed as the group sat in the common area. "Do you think it was sabotage?"
"Of course it was," Gabriel snapped, straightening the pink collar of his once-grey polo shirt. "The real question is who did it?"
"Maybe it was just a glitch in the machine, or dirty water." Uriel rolled her eyes, folding her purple-and-green-streaked arms. "No one is trying to sabotage us."
Aziraphale giggled to herself as she listened from the couch across the room.
"Stop squirming," Crowley reprimanded, grabbing her hand back to continue painting the nails a nice dark blue. Her fingers, with her own nails freshly painted black, settled around Aziraphale's wrist as she carefully covered the dye-stained nails with polish. "I'm nearly done, you wonderful angel of vengeance."