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It was already sunset, somehow, when River looked at Payton with that smile on his face and Payton knew, whatever came out of River’s mouth, he’d agree to it.
“Let’s go for a walk on the beach.”
Payton nodded, his face twitching into a barely-there smile before he could stop it. River had noticed, Payton knew, as his bright blue eyes twinkled. They left the small bistro where they’d eaten dinner and drove the few blocks to the beach.
Payton put the car in park and placed his hand on River’s arm before he could open his door. River looked at him with that open look that just killed Payton. He felt his face crack open alongside his heart and suddenly forgot what he wanted to say. All he wanted to do was lean in and close the small gap between his lips and River’s.
He shook his head a little, clearing his throat and blinking quickly to get rid of the tears that had snuck into his eyes. He took his hand back from River’s arm and fidgeted with his fingers in his lap.
River simply watched him, patient as ever.
“Thank you,” Payton finally got out. River furrowed his brows the slightest bit.
“For what?”
“Just...y’know, taking the whole evening to distract me. I know I get in my head and I can be hard to deal with, especially with the campaign, but today has been really, uh—” he swallowed thickly, glancing up at River and forgetting his words again.
“Nice,” he finished lamely. That urge was back, to just lean over the centre console of his stupidly expensive Alfa Romeo and kiss River like he was the only oxygen left and Payton was suffocating. Like he was a lifeline. Because he was.
“You’re welcome,” River said softly, placing one large hand over both of Payton’s where they were still fidgeting. He nodded his head toward the beach. “Come on. Let’s catch the last bit of the sunset.”
﹌
They walked until the sun’s light was completely gone. River didn’t say much, but even just having him there quieted all the noise in Payton’s head. Payton didn’t know how he did it—he wasn’t sure River had any idea, either—but he was still in awe that River could make him vulnerable and calm. The only person who’d ever been able to do that in his life was his mother. He had always assumed Georgina Hobart was the only person capable of it.
“What’re you thinking about over there?” River’s voice floated to Payton with the waves.
“You,” he answered easily, not worrying about making the right impression for once. “My mom.”
“Interesting combination,” River noted. “Thinking about how jealous you are of our Mandarin skills?” He bumped Payton’s shoulder with his own.
“Ha ha,” Payton responded dryly. “Not quite.”
River was silent, dropping easily into the sand and giving Payton space to say what he was thinking. Payton hesitated for a moment before settling next to River in the sand. He glanced at River out of the side of his eye, pulling his knees to his chest and crossing his arms over them.
“Remember the first day you came to my house?” he asked.
River’s answering grin was surprised, it shocked itself onto his face. “Of course.”
“What do you remember?” Payton glanced around nervously. He didn’t want to remind River of his vulnerability if River didn’t remember it himself.
“I remember kissing you,” River said quietly. His eyes were shining again and his smile was wistful. Payton watched him for a moment too long while trying to tamp down his blush. He wasn’t successful, but at least it was dark enough now that River wouldn’t see. “And I remember you tasted like salt,” River added after a long moment.
“Ah,” Payton responded, looking out at the ocean. “You’re the only person I’m like that with.”
“I know,” River said quietly. Payton almost wished he’d be cocky about it, but instead his words were kind and straightforward.
“Other than my mom,” Payton added. “That’s what I was thinking about.”
“So I’m like your mom?” River giggled, turning to Payton.
Payton’s cheeks burned and he playfully shoved River’s chest. “You know that’s not how I meant it. I just—ow!”
Payton’s neck snapped toward his feet, where his ankles had just been assaulted.
“Shit, sorry,” a voice came from above him. “I literally can’t see anything, it’s so dark. Sorry to interrupt your date, shit.”
Payton stared skeptically at the man standing above them for a second before registering what he said.
“Oh, we’re not on a date,” he rushed to clarify. “But that’s very progressive of you,” he added.
The man, who looked to be in his thirties, shifted his gaze to River.
“What’s your name?” he demanded.
“Uh, River.”
“River,” the man said, leaning over to clasp River’s shoulder, “I’m so sorry this dumbass doesn’t realize he’s on a date with you right now.”
Payton looked between the two men, spluttering. “What? We’re not on a date!” he insisted, looking to River for confirmation.
When no response met him, he felt his face soften into confusion. “Are we?” he asked quietly.
River grinned sheepishly, his dimples deep enough to drink out of, and shrugged one shoulder. “I mean, I kinda hoped…” he trailed off, biting his lower lip.
“Oh, thank god,” he rushed out, grabbing the lapels of River’s stupid letterman jacket and kissing him. River’s lips were soft and sure and steady, everything Payton wasn’t. River met his frantic kisses and slowed them, sucking on his bottom lip just enough to make Payton whimper.
He let himself fully fall into it in a way he hadn’t that first time in his bedroom. He’d been terrified ever since, knowing that he would let River destroy him if he wanted to. But there, with River’s lips against his and the sound of waves drowning out the retreating steps in the sand, he was willing to take the risk.