deadsapphicssociety
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"“What if you just explored with me?” Eddie blurts, and only in the following silence does he register the words that came out of his mouth.
“What?”
“If Tommy won’t do it, then do it with me. You’ve never been on top with a guy, and I’m not opposed to bottoming or trying whatever it is you want to do,” Eddie explains, feigning nonchalance. “It can be a learning experience for both of us.”
Buck smiles at him, confused and pretty as ever, and Eddie would do anything for him. How could anyone not want to give him whatever he asks for?"
or
in which theres a looming sense of doom clouding eddie's head as they work him up to bottoming for the first time, buck has been weird lately, and to make matters worse, tommy's still around for some reason
(title from "illicit affairs" by taylor swift)
Series
- Part 5 of high infidelity
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"During work, their little routine becomes liquid smooth, attached at the hip. Buck doesn’t think anyone’s noticed, because they’re always this close, but it feels different on some deep, spiritual level that only the two of them see.
There’s the moral deviance of it all, the thrill of keeping a secret and sneaking around, and even though they don’t talk about it- they never, ever talk about it-, Buck’s sure they’re both getting off on it."
or
in which Buck and Eddie are awful at this secret-relationship thing, the entire 118 and co. are witness to their messiness, Maddie and Chim get the wedding reception they deserve, and Tommy is still a loser
(title from "i can see you" by taylor swift)
Series
- Part 4 of high infidelity
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"If he looked back hours later, Eddie would remember the events exactly as they happened, every explicit moment burned into his memory, down to the clink of a mug on his coffee table to the heavy falling of footsteps down the hall. The spicy-sweet scent of expensive cologne, eager hands and trembling legs and the soft whisper of promises, secrets shared in the dark.
He’d remember it in excruciating detail.
But right now, Eddie can’t remember much of anything past the fog in his head, because all rational function has exited his brain, and all he can think of is how he’s pretty sure Buck is on his way over to fuck him."
or
in which Buck comes over, orgasms are exchanged, love confessions aren't, and they should probably talk about the Tommy-sized elephant in the room (spoiler: they don't!)
(title from "the alchemy" by Taylor swift)
Series
- Part 3 of high infidelity
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"It’s all very fine.
Except… it’s not.
It’s not fine, because of Eddie fucking Diaz, who had to show up in his life and stick around for years and be kind and beautiful and kiss him, rewiring every single part of his brain until Buck couldn’t do anything but want and want and want. It plagues him, but not for the guilt.
The guilt, Buck realizes, about 36 hours after the kiss even happens, isn’t even about the kiss itself. It’s about his dick."
or
in which Buck avoids Eddie while he grapples with the kiss and what that means for him and Eddie's relationship, Maddie is over it, and he is suddenly unable to get off with Tommy. it's a stressful week.
(title from 'guilty as sin?' by taylor swift)
Series
- Part 2 of high infidelity
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"Shocking to no one, there’s nothing Eddie wouldn’t do for his son. Nothing.
Even if he can’t erase the decade and a half of trauma and hurt Christopher will no doubt have to unpack later in life, he can at least try and make up for the whole ‘making his son walk in on him with his dead mom’s clone’ thing, even if that means he has to be a bit more lenient and say yes to things he’d normally say no to.
Which is how he ends up in a crafts store with a moody teenager, a bossy best friend, and his actual boss, standing in the party decor aisle and arguing with the aforementioned bossy best friend on what color streamers and paper plates match the ladder truck’s paint coat best."
or
in which the 118 holds a movie night for Chris's school, Buck's boyfriend is a flaky loser, Bobby knows too much, and Eddie suffers. greatly.
(title from 'you belong with me' by taylor swift)
Series
- Part 1 of high infidelity
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He’s so close. But Buck’s face sways even closer, eyes laser-focused on Eddie’s mouth, like he wants to ensure that what he whispers next make its way inside:
“The quiet, closeted catastrophe of Edmundo Diaz—performed nightly for an audience of none.”
Eddie flinches like the words hit skin. For a second, all the noise in his head goes silent, leaving gaping awareness and the awful, naked feeling of being seen.
“W-what—” Eddie’s voice cracks and he’s trying to frown, trying to be mad, but he feels exposed, so his words come out broken, quiet and confused. “What’s that supposed to mean?”
or: buck fights back during the kitchen scene in 8x17 and it sends eddie spiralling
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Bookmarked by deadsapphicssociety
17 Oct 2025
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“Are those okay?” he asks, sweet and easy.
Eddie glances down. It’s Buck’s boxers, loose and comfortable and low on his waist. They’re light blue and nicer than the ones Eddie buys for himself. He smiles a little, looks up at Buck through his lashes.
“Better than okay,” he admits.
—five times eddie wears buck's clothes without understanding why; and the one time he does.
Bookmarked by deadsapphicssociety
01 Oct 2025
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“You want to sub for me?” Buck asks, surprised but not altogether unwilling.
Eddie sets his jaw and averts his gaze. This is a horrible idea. It’s letting down one defense too many, even in front of Buck. He’s been mulling this over for days, finally working up the courage one night when they have the house to themselves.
“Not if—I mean, if you don’t want—Never mind, I shouldn’t have asked.”
“Eddie.” Buck says his name with such comfort, such love, that Eddie can’t help but look up. “I would love to do that with you.”
or, Eddie subs for the first time and learns that being soft dommed by Buck can heal him
Bookmarked by deadsapphicssociety
01 Oct 2025
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“Eat,” Buck instructs. His tone is gentle and private, but there’s an undertone to it, one that Eddie knows well. It’s a firmness, something akin to a hand pressing down on the back of his neck.
“C’mon, man—”
A hand lands on Eddie’s other shoulder, thumbs pressing into Eddie’s shoulder blades, working in small, tight circles.
Eddie’s lashes flutter, a soft exhale escaping him.
“Come on, half the bowl. I know you didn’t eat breakfast, and lunch won’t be ready for another thirty.” Buck’s voice is edged with concern, and leaves very little space to argue. It’s only after Buck points it out that Eddie realises how hungry he is.
Suddenly, thumbs shift, pressing into the spot just at the base of his neck where he always holds a lot of tension, the muscles taut and straining with stress.
Another soft noise escapes Eddie. A part of Eddie wants to argue, but a shameful, insistent part of him is so grateful not to have to decide. He didn’t have to decide to eat, he didn’t have to decide what to eat, how much to eat, or when his next meal would be.
All Eddie has to do is relax under Buck’s hands and pick up a piece of fruit.
OR The joy of letting your boyfriend take care of you
Bookmarked by deadsapphicssociety
01 Oct 2025
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"You look exactly the same," Eddie says with tears in his eyes. "How is that even possible?"
"I don't know," Buck says, his thumb swiping across Eddie's knuckles. "I don't understand it."
He may be the same, but looking at Eddie, Buck can see the years on him. His hair is a bit different, the creases by the corners of his eyes just a bit deeper. There's a new scar on his right hand that Buck hasn't seen before.He'd know these hands blind, but it takes him a moment to notice it still. His fingers brush over it once, and then again before he actually looks down and sees the thin golden band wrapped around Eddie's ring finger. Then he just—stares at it, stupidly, for a second. Before Eddie pulls his hands back, and leaves Buck's hanging empty in the space between them.
"You're married," he says.
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Bookmarked by deadsapphicssociety
05 Apr 2025