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Yaz quietly sneaked past the living room, trying to aim for her room as the TV blared whitenoise in the background. Her Dad was asleep, probably tried to stay up to wait for Najia- doing the late shifts yet again. Yaz sometimes wondered when her mum was going to have a break- if she was ever going to get a break that it.
“Yaz dinners in the microwave love.”
Yaz abruptly halted and smiled. No getting past Hakim Khan of all people, she tiptoed to the sofa, kissing him on the head, sweat staining her officer clothes. “Thanks Dad.”
Hakim began to sit up, rubbing his already drooping eyes. “What time is it?”
“Ten last time I checked.”
“Long shift?”
“Quite boring actually.”
“Well if you want spice, there’s enough curry to burn your brains off.” Hakim joked as Yaz rolled her eyes and headed for the kitchen. Although he wasn’t stupid- she had been living a boring life, living in a world with so much potential yet something was holding her back- or someone. Since the Doctor vanished life was now painted in black and white, there was no colour in Yaz’s eyes, no flare to her step- she was an empty shell of herself, waiting for someone to make her better- waiting for her Doctor to fix her up. One mention of her name and Yaz tried to change the conversation to the point where no one mentioned her. He could deal with the silences, the lost look in the corner of her eyes, her staring into space gazing longingly at the sky, but it was the crying Hakim couldn’t deal with. Each night he would go past Yaz’s room to hear the muffled cries of his daughter. Even if Yaz had been working all day, and all night, it was like she couldn’t go to sleep without crying. Hakim had never seen her so bad since they had to get the police involved.
And that shook him to the core.
“Is Son asleep?”
Yaz’s voice broke his line of thoughts and he stood up, joining his daughter in the kitchen. He needed a cuppa- pronto. “Yeah had her mates around all day today so she’s wiped out.”
“I know the feeling.” Yaz muttered and Hakim’s heart sank. He leant against the sink watching his Doctor intently as she put the curry in the Microwave every two minutes absentmindedly, like she had forgotten she had already put it in the microwave before that. Hakim didn’t say anything, there was no point, it wasn’t going to bring the Doctor back.
“How are you love?”
“I’m good, two weeks then ive finished my probation.”
“Do you want one?” Hakim asked pointing at the tea bags and she nodded gratefully. “That must be exciting. New promotion and all that.”
“Yeah it’s good.”
Hakim flinched as the water bubbled over the edges and licked his hands. He didn’t wince like he had done yesterday when Najia wanted him to fix the sink, he couldn’t let his guard down- not for his babygirl, he needed to be strong, needed to be a superhero to his daughter- pain was nothing. Pain wasn’t going to bring back the Doctor.
“Heya I’m back!” Najia called and Hakim noticed Yaz slump, mumbling a thank you as she took her tea. Najia strolled into the kitchen trying to smile, but it wasn’t coming. Yaz quickly excused herself after that and Hakim enveloped his wife into an embrace.
“Oh Hakim, what are we going to do.”
“She’ll get better.”
Najia shook her head and pulled back defeatedly. “It’s been three months now.”
“Yeah and she’s doing well.”
Najia couldn’t disagree, last week she had spent all night holding Yaz as she fell asleep- having dreams over and over of the Doctor, tears spilling out like Niagara falls. This week there had been no outbursts, just the silence and the sadness that trailed behind her but to the Khans it was nothing new it was just Yaz now. Najia was thankful to have her husband, the whole family were- always the optimist, always fighting for what was right. Just like the Doctor had done- and Najia hated herself for it, hated being happy because she had her optimistic and passionate husband, but Yaz had lost her Hakim, she had lost her Doctor. Hakim placed a kiss on his wifes forehead, like he could feel her thoughts, or maybe they were always just thinking of the same thing- always Yaz, always the Doctor- like an electric carousel where the batteries never died.
“Maybe we can find her.”
“Hakim I don’t think that’s a good idea.”
“Why not?”
“Because what if she’s hurt? Or dead? What if we can’t find her? Yaz wouldn’t be able to cope.”
“We can’t just do nothing Naj, it’s going to kill her one way or another.”
They were both on the brink of tears. Both exhausted, both lost, but at least they were together.
//////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////
It was a week and a half later when Hakim had discovered the Doctors whereabouts, and well it wasn’t hard because the Doctor was crumpled outside his front door at nine in the morning with Ryan and Graham chasing after her.
“Hey Yaz’s Dad.” The Doctor heavily breathed out, and he just stood there like a lemon because it’s not everyday when you go to the door expecting to see the postman (Stuart, lovely fellow) and instead it is the missing alien woman thing that’s covered in blood, looks absolutely knackered and oh yeah- the person Yaz is absolutely in love with.
Brilliant.
“I’m so sorry, we tried to let her have a kip on the sofa but she wasn’t having any of it is Yaz around?” Graham said hauling the Doctor up as she fell against his shoulders looking drunk.
“She’s at work.”
“That’s why she’s not been answering my messages.” Ryan huffed shoving his phone in his pocked as the Doctor flung her other arm around Ryans shoulder.
“Honestly I’m fine, a little bit out of breath but I’m all good.” The Doctor cheered, and Hakim realised that she had definitely beaten him as the most positive person ever. Suddenly Hakim sprang into action and motioned everyone in, directing them to the sofa where the Doctor flopped down on it like a leaf leaving Sonya and Najia to tend to the extended family. Hakim walked into the kitchen trying to find the first aid kit, he had to be a superhero, he had to be a superhero, for Yaz, for Yaz, for his little girl.
“Hakim can you get the first aid kit love?” Najia called out and he looked faster, flinging open drawers and cupboards and then he looked at the sink.
That bloody sink.
He dived under to find the green medical box and he hurried over to where everyone was corwded around the Doctor who was squirming on the sofa, writhing in pain.
“Honestly I’m fine, just need to find Yaz.”
“No offence Doc but you don’t look it.” Graham joked and the Doctor smiled.
“I don’t need first aid, where’s Yaz.”
“She’s at work, but she’ll be in the hospital if she finds you like this.” Najia said sternly, but it was out of love, because Yaz really would have a heart attack if she saw the love of her life sprawled across the sofa drenched in blood. Najia did a double take and realised that in fact the Doctor was just sprawled and no longer moving, she gulped and panic sank into her stomach like lead. “Doctor?”
“I’m calling the police.” Sonya stated clicking on her phone frantically.
“What no you cant she’s our friend!” Ryan hissed and although it shouldn’t have been so hot, Sonya just couldn’t help but gawp at him like he was a Rockstar.
“Not for that, so we can contact Yaz. She needs to know what’s going on.”
“I need to assess the wound, see how deep it is, Graham can you get me some clothes, Ryan lots of towels, Sonya will show you.” Both parents and Ryan heard her mutter ‘anytime’ under her breath and Najia wished she had said that another time so she could torment her as payback for all the time Sonya teased Yaz about her ever growing crush on the woman laying half dead on her sofa.
////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////
Yaz got the call ten minutes ago. She was in her car within three, and now she was four minutes away from the house. Four minutes away from the Doctor- a barely breathing and audible Doctor, but still the Doctor all the same.
She just managed to pull the handbrake as she came into her parking spot.
Now was the tricky question- wait for the lifts to come, and risk other people interjecting her or run, run up those stairs without having to wait, without the hassle of being stuck surrounded by other people who were quite frankly not the Doctor.
Fuck it. She was going to run.
It was twenty two minutes by the time she flung open the door to find everyone crouched round the Doctor, who was wait- wearing her unicorn pajamas... Yaz glanced at Sonya accusingly and her sister made no attempt to deny it. She was going to kill her once all of this was over. Everyone made a Yaz shaped hope right n front of the sofa, and Yaz kneeled perfectly into it, clutching the Doctors wan hands, blood caked inside her fingernails.
“What happened?” Yaz mumbled, taking a full look at her friend. Hair was disheveled, mud splattered on her face where her Mum hadn’t come round to cleaning it yet, her stomach seemed ticker and she noticed it must have been a bandage, Yaz couldn’t help the tears. The Doctor looked worse than she had felt for the last three months.
“We don’t know Yaz, she had teleported into Grahams kitchen, refusing help came here looking for you.” Najia whispered, squeezing Yaz’s shoulders comfortingly from behind. Yaz smiled slightly, honoured that the Doctor wanted to see her badly, but then the anger settled.
“How bad is she?”
“Mainly bruises, some sort of stab wound, pretty life threatening for a human but I have no idea for aliens.”
“What were you thinking Doctor, you needed to sleep.” Yaz chided like the Doctor could hear her, Yaz held her hand tighly like they were about to head for another adventure, kissing her palms like the Doctor was giving birth and she was doing so well.
“I want babies too ya know, especially now I’m a woman.” The Doctor mumbled and Yaz froze, feeling the burn of everyone’s eyes staring at her amusedly. “Sorry can’t help but touch telemawosit, no control when im like this.”
Yaz was just hoping the Doctor couldn’t read any more thoughts, accidental or not they had not had the conversation it.
“I’d like your babies too Yaz.”
Yaz dropped the Doctors hands soon after that as the faint chuckles echoed and blanketed the noon.
///////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////
Darkness.
Now light, the lamp in the corner giving out the only source-radiating, pulsating, living.
Hakim sat yp, having fallen asleep on the opposite sofa. He was watching Yaz watch the Doctor. It turned out the Doctor was a snorer and Ryan and Graham couldn’t sleep with her in the same room as them. They had gone home a few hours ago. Yaz hadn’t moved, barely ate, barely drank, she just stayed n the same position, her legs probably numb, her neck sore as she just kept it straight, her eyes now asleep- but her entire position frozen. Najia had draped a blanket over them around four in the afternoon, and Hakim checked his watch.
Seven in the evening.
Hakim soon fell into darkness after that.
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“What do you mean he doesn’t like custard creams for breakfast?”
“It’s not exactly traditional.”
“You humans and your rules honestly.”
“Doctor believe it or not but some of us like being normal.”
“Ha you normal Yaz, I couldn’t be in love with someone who’s normal.”
“Love is it now?”
“Of course, and I hope it is the same for oooh look he’s waking up!”
Hakim opened his blurry eyes, his eyes aching and the light now searing. Music was playing on in the radio for the first time in three months, and Yaz and the Doctor were staring in front of him with a cup of tea and biscuits, grinning affectionately at each other.
“Doctor? You’re ok?” Hakim said sitting straight, he was either in a dream or this was reality and somehow reality was pretty good. The Doctor did her famous grin and handed him the tea- perfect temperature- this was definitely a dream.
“Right as rain me, twenty four hours of napping and im a completely different person! Well not completely because I haven’t regenerated or anything, unless I have and Yaz just isn’t telling me, and anyways how are you?”
Hakim chuckled scratching his beard, he had missed the soft laughs from his daughter and the long ramblings of the Doctor. Missed it too much. “Better now that you’re healed, wish I was an alien if it meant I could heal that fast!”
“Pah aliens are hardly anything compared to you Yaz’s Dad, you’re human, the best species out there.”
“Yaz help me with the dishes please.” Najia called and Yaz squeezed the Doctors hands lovingly before bounding into the kitchen. The Doctor watched Yaz go longingly, like she was afraid she would never see Yaz ever again, until she focused back on Hakim smiling softly, all knowingly.
“I’m guessing you know it was me then.” Hakim confessed and the Doctor nodded softly.
“If it wasn’t of you telling Torchwood, well. They may have imprisoned the wrong Doctor. You saved my life Hakim.” The Doctors voice was old and husky, rustic and loving and she stared straight into his eyes like she was bearing his soul. “Thank you.”
Hakim took another sip of his tea. “No thank you Doctor, you saved all of our lives. “
The Doctor really had yet again. He knew he was superhero for the day but the Doctor was doing it everyday, and maye she was rubbing off on him. It was like the Doctor was part of the family, and even if Yaz no longer cared about the Doctor (like that would ever happen), she was always going to be family. She was the lamp in the room and as he watched the Doctor stand up to embrace his daughter so softly, soothingly, lovingly, he glanced at his wife in understanding.
It was time to throw away the batteries from the carousel.