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Even from the start, neither Yoongi or Taehyung had it easy. Yoongi was kicked out of the house just after turning eighteen, and with nowhere to go, his boyfriend of two years was quick to take him in. Taehyung’s parents were more than happy to welcome their son’s friend who was having family troubles into their house. But only as his friend. They couldn’t know of the nature of their relationship.
But they should have expected it, and it came in the same fate as Yoongi just a few months later. It was no more than three weeks after Taehyung’s birthday when his bedroom door flew open as the two were cuddled up to watch a movie, lips locked in a soft kiss. His parents were meant to be out for a few hours, but it turned out they had forgotten something.
He never found out what they’d forgotten, he didn’t get the chance. The screaming and yelling didn’t exactly give the chance to ask, and neither was when he was forced to pack his things, tears streaming down his face. Neither was when his father told him not to come back until he was fixed, the echo of the door slamming through his mind.
He’d turned around on his heels, marching away from the building, Yoongi still standing in shock with his own bag in hand. The older boy ran after him, calling for him to slow down and wait. Taehyung didn’t stop until he reached a nearby park, where he put his stuff down on a bench, waiting for Yoongi to catch up.
He was scared Taehyung would blame him, need space, but it was quite the opposite. When he caught up, his bag slung over his shoulder and calling out for him quietly, Taehyung had pulled him close and buried his face against his shoulder. “I love you. We’re gonna be fine, okay? I promise. We can do it, just us.” He’d said, voice shaky yet determined.
Yoongi smiled lightly, wrapping his arms around the boy in return, letting out a small sigh. “Just us. I love you too, baby.” He murmured, pressing a kiss to the side of his head, holding the boy close as he finally let himself cry into Yoongi’s shoulder.
----
It hadn’t been easy, not at all. After a lot of tears, sleeping on friends' couches, long nights, hunting for jobs and apartments, they finally found a routine four years later.
They secured an apartment, and as small and dingy as it was, it was home. It was cheap enough when they’d found it, and they’d both been more than excited. After a few days of painting and redecorating, it didn’t look so bad. Sure, they couldn’t afford the best furniture and the cracks that kept appearing in the walls wouldn’t go away, and the shower was horrible, and the floorboards creaked all the time, and there was a constant cold draught, but it was home, finally.
But it was hard, and it kept getting harder. The apartment may have been cheap when they found it, but the rent was rising quickly with each month, something about how this area of town was getting more desirable, which was hard to believe. But they couldn’t find anywhere else, and they’d had to deal with it.
They both worked two jobs, which was very demanding. Neither of them were home very much, spending so little time together was hard. Yoongi still had dreams of being a music producer but he knew that was completely out of the picture now, which was difficult to admit because it had been his dream since he was eleven. Taehyung still had dreams of being an artist, yet they didn’t have the money to afford simple things such as paint, or the bare minimum equipment.
After working two jobs every day for the last two years, barely sleeping, while living in a worn down and constantly cold apartment, one of them was bound to get sick at some point. And that unfortunate one was Yoongi. At first he had thought it was his stomach just being unsettled, it being a little sore and uncomfortable, and so he went on normally. But when he woke up for work he could barely get on his feet, soreness and sharp pains too much. He convinced himself he was fine… until he barely made it to the bathroom in time when he threw up, not even four minutes after waking up. He couldn’t get off the bathroom floor and had to call into both of his jobs sick.
His jobs were shit, he knew. Both were some companies that he was pretty sure weren't entirely legal but nowhere else would hire him, he hadn’t had another option. He didn’t get paid when he was off sick, despite it being his first ever day that he’d taken off in two years there. With their rent and other bills due, they couldn’t afford for him to miss a day of work. But… He didn’t really have a choice. He couldn’t even get up, and he needed to rest before he got any worse.
After a while of hanging over the toilet bowl, he managed to drag himself back to bed with a bucket, slumping down onto the mattress. He sent Taehyung a quick message to let him know of the situation, knowing he couldn’t reply considering it was five-thirty in the morning, which meant the younger was already at work. It was only a few minutes later that he fell back into a deep sleep, without even realising it.
Hours later he woke up, head fuzzy and stomach painful. Luckily he managed to get himself out of bed this time, dragging himself to the kitchen to get a drink and some painkillers. The two glasses of water left his head a little clearer, the pain settling into a dull ache that he hoped would be helped by the medication soon enough. Checking his phone told him it was only just after twelve, meaning he’d slept for nearly an impressive six hours, and no messages from Taehyung.
The simple thought of more sleep was enough to lure him back to bed, climbing into it with a sigh of relief before curling up. It didn’t take long to fall back asleep, passing out as soon as his head hit the pillow.
It was getting dark outside when he woke again, which came as a surprise. But the next thing he noticed was that the pain was gone, and his muscles didn’t feel near impossible to move anymore. He managed to get himself up from the bed, and surprisingly he felt like he had more energy than he’d had in years. The time showed it was nearing ten at night, the amount he’d slept surprising him once again. It also meant that Taehyung would be home in about an hour, and he’d probably have time to make them a proper meal for the first time in a while.
But even if he felt better, he still felt gross from sleeping and laying around all day, so he took himself to the shower. He took a mostly cold one since they didn’t really have the budget for a hot shower, just warm enough to take the edge from the cold away. It wasn’t long before he was changing into fresh clothes, heading to the kitchen to get started on the cooking.
He wasn’t the best chef and they didn’t have the best quality ingredients, but he made do with what they had. He managed to get a simple dish started, excited to be able to eat an actual meal with his boyfriend for the first time in a long time due to their working hours.
While it was cooking he had time to quickly tidy the house, thankful when his pains really did seem to be gone. He assumed that maybe he hadn’t been sick, and it had just been a form of sleep deprivation, the four or so hours a night for two years finally getting to him. But he’d slept for most of the day and felt amazing, and he’d be back to work by tomorrow.
When the food was done at was close to eleven, so he rushed to quickly dish up all the food, setting them out on the coffee table where they usually ate. Once everything was arranged, he went back to the kitchen to make sure everything was cleaned up and put away properly. He heard the door opening, a smile spreading across his lips when he heard it close again, Taehyung shuffling around near the door before he came into the living room properly.
What he expected to see when he entered was a smile matching his own on his boyfriend's lips as he looked at the food he’d prepared for them, and the now clean house. But that was not what he was met with.
Taehyung had a small frown on his lips as he looked around the room, brows furrowed as if he was confused. He looked up when Yoongi entered, his eyes flickering over his body in a way that left Yoongi feeling oddly intimidated.
“I thought you were sick?” Came his first words, a shiver running down Yoongi’s spine at the coldness of his tone. He thought he had been, too. And in a way, he had. But it had resolved with the rest he’d gotten, as it was much needed.
“I- uh, well… I was. But I got some sleep, I basically slept the whole day, and I feel better now.” He said in explanation, trying to rid himself of the uneasy feeling. It was just Taehyung, he had no reason to feel nervous or judged around the younger.
“Right… You couldn’t have been that sick then, right?” Taehyung asked, raising an eyebrow as he looked back to him. “Your message made it seem like you were actually ill.”
Yoongi frowned, not knowing what he was implying. He really had been sick, why would he lie about that? Maybe he wasn’t sick with an illness, but he had been unwell in the morning, and could barely move with the pain. His throat grew slightly tighter at the way he felt like he was under interrogation.
“I was.” He murmured, but his voice was so quiet, almost unsure. “I couldn’t… get up, this morning. So I rested, and took some meds, and I feel a little better now.”
“Oh, was it hard for you to get up?” Taehyung asked, his tone mocking. “You know, you aren’t the only one who is tired. I’m tired too, Yoongi. And I still get up in the morning.”
Yoongi shook his head, opening his mouth to interject. “No, I wasn’t tired, just-“
“You know, maybe if you actually slept, you would have been able to get up for work.” The younger spat at him in interruption, and Yoongi felt frozen in place. “Maybe if you actually slept instead of staying up all night working on that fucking music that nobody is ever going to care about, then you’d get enough sleep to be able to wake up and go to work.”
A silence filled the room after that, not even the sounds of them breathing could be heard, as if they were both holding their breaths. When the silence dragged on, becoming uncomfortable, Taehyung tried to speak up. “...Yoongi-“
“Okay.” The older breathed out, cutting him off. He moved, suddenly so fast, compared to how they’d been frozen just before. He stumbled back a little, not able to even look at Taehyung, his eyes and throat burning. “Okay. Yeah. I’m just gonna- I… Hobi’s.”
Taehyung didn’t say anything, and Yoongi couldn’t see his face, didn’t want to. He turned to leave the room, towards the front door, trying his best to tug his shoes on, ignoring the pain in his stomach that had seemed to return, badly.
The door seemed too loud when it slammed behind him, the cold hitting him, but it was nothing compared to the pain that suddenly seared through his stomach. It was almost blinding, much worse than before. But he needed to get away, he could do it. He could have gone to work.
He made it into the elevator before the tears started falling from his eyes, not sure if the pain in his stomach or in his heart was worse. He vaguely registered that he'd left his phone but he didn’t care, he couldn’t go back, he just had to get to Hoseok’s. Everything seemed so distant and he blamed the tears, just wanting to get there already.
----
Taehyung hadn’t meant his words, he knew he hadn’t. But he still couldn’t take them back right away. Of course, there were days when they weren’t feeling perfect, not up for going to work. That didn’t mean they could just skip work though, he’d made his way in even with one of the worst colds he’d ever had. Yoongi knew how tight money was right now, if he’d been well enough to get up and make food and clean, then he could have easily gone to work.
But they couldn’t exactly afford to waste food, so after he’d spent a few minutes hovering around the living room thinking over the exchange, he moved to start silently wrapping the food to store it in the fridge. He didn’t have much of an appetite anymore, and if Yoongi made the food then he didn’t want to eat it just to himself after the older had left.
He thought about messaging him, even if it was just to ask when he would come home. An uneasy feeling was building in his stomach and he assumed it to be guilt, but he wasn’t ready to feel bad about the situation just yet.
But it couldn’t have been more than an hour before his phone went off on it’s own, surprisingly the ringtone playing through the room and not the sound of a text notification. He reached to grab the device, frowning when he noticed it was an unknown number, but swiped along to answer it anyway.
“Hello, is this Kim Taehyung?” A voice came through the phone, and he gave a small nod before he answered despite the person on the other end not able to see him.
“Uh, yeah, it is.” He answered dumbly, opening his mouth to ask who it was but was cut off before he could speak.
“We’re calling due to you being listed as an emergency contact for Min Yoongi.” The person stated, and Taehyung found the uneasy feeling building. “He was taken in to us by ambulance approximately twenty minutes ago after he was found collapsed on the street. He’s currently being taken into emergency surgery. Is it possible for you to make your way here?”
Taehyung felt his stomach drop, the uneasy feeling bubbling over and making him feel sick. His mouth felt as dry as anything, and he found himself unable to speak, unsure how much time had gone by before he found his voice. “-eah.” He breathed, clearing his throat. “Yeah. Y-yeah, I can come in, right now.”
There wasn’t much more, the person telling him to come to the reception when he arrived, but he wasn’t really paying attention. Yoongi was in the hospital. He’d collapsed, on the street. After Taehyung had let him leave. And he’d left because of what Taehyung had said. Had he really been that sick?
He found himself tugging on his jacket and shoes before he could even hang up, not even recalling what else he’d said, if anything. Within a minute he was already outside, locking the apartment door and rushing down the stairs.
They didn’t own a car, and he didn’t have the cash for a cab. He contemplated phoning Hoseok or someone else, but he didn’t want to have to wait for them. So instead he took off running, not caring how weird he looked at the late hour, he just needed to get there.
And he did, half an hour later, heart pounding and sweating but that was the least of his worries. He made his way up to the reception, clearing his throat and forcing the words out. “I- uh, Kim Taehyung. I’m here for Min Yoongi?” He spoke, once he had been acknowledged. They seemed to search something up, before giving him a little nod.
“He’s in surgery right now, but you can take a seat and someone will call for you when you can see him.” He was told and he gave a quiet thank you, before turning to go and sit down. The seats were uncomfortable and he just wanted to see Yoongi already, but he knew he had to wait.
It felt like days that he sat there, fidgeting and watching everyone around him. A million things were rushing through his mind, wondering if this was all his fault. He’d caused Yoongi to leave, because of what he’d said. He was too harsh on him, tried to downplay it when it was clear now that something was wrong.
In reality, it was only a couple of hours before he was snapped out of it, his name being called from across the room. He quickly got to his feet, making his way over to the nurse who had called on him. She gave a small smile before gesturing for him to follow, making their way towards the elevator. He had so many things he wanted to ask, yet couldn’t seem to form any words.
They only went up three floors before getting off, making their way down seemingly never ending hallways. “Here we are. 308.” She said, once they’d slowed to a stop at a door. “He’s only just been taken up from the OR down in the emergency department, so he may still be out for a few more hours.” He was told, before they entered.
The first thing he noticed was how small Yoongi looked in the bed, the loose gown and white sheets covering him up to his chest. He also looked a sickly colour, and he wondered if he just hadn’t noticed that earlier. He slowly made his way over, pulling the chair to the bedside, sitting himself down. “What was- what was it? What happened?” He managed to ask as he hesitantly took the olders limp hand, glad he’d picked the side without the cannula.
She looked down at her papers, scanning through a few things, before looking up to him. “An ambulance was called by a passerby when he was found collapsed on the ground, and he was taken in. He performed a few tests and noticed high levels of inflammation, so we did a quick ultrasound scan over his stomach region, and it appeared his appendix had ruptured. So we took him straight into the operating theatre since we do need to clear that up as soon as possible as it can be life-threatening.” The nurse explained, before double-checking the IV. “He’ll be as good as new soon though, don’t worry. Just call on us if he wakes up, or you need anything.”
Taehyung gave a grateful smile as she left, but couldn’t seem to say anything. Yoongi had really been in that much pain? And he’d been so dismissive and horrible? He swallowed thickly, holding his hand a little tighter. As much as he wanted the older to rest, he just wanted to apologise, tell him how sorry he was.
It wasn’t as torturous as the waiting room, but it was still painful to sit there, even if the quiet beeps of the machines meant it wasn’t total silence. Time seemed to pass quicker though, but maybe that was because he seemed to zone out, overthinking. It could have been hours before he felt the older shifting, his hand moving in his own.
His attention was immediately drawn to him, sitting up in his chair, alert. He swallowed thickly, watching as the other stirred, discomfort obvious on his face as he woke up. Taehyung kept his gaze on him anxiously, eyes meeting the others when he eventually opened them, looking over at him.
“...Tae?” Yoongi murmured, his voice scratchy and rough.
He nodded quickly, his hand squeezing the olders once again. “Hey, baby. How… how are you feeling?” Taehyung asked, a little nervous, as if worried that he’d be upset or mad at him.
“I, um…” He mumbled, seeing to pause for a few seconds as if unsure himself. “Water?”
Taehyung glanced around, his eyes spotting a jug of water near the bedside, letting go of Yoongi’s hand to quickly make his way over to it. He poured some into one of the plastic cups beside it, taking it to the bedside.
He sat down again, leaning over to help bring it to the other's lips, since he still seemed a little unsteady. Once he’d had a few sips and didn’t seem to want anymore he moved it away from his lips, setting it off to the side.
Yoongi took a few seconds, licking over his lower lip before he spoke up. “What… happened?” He asked, looking back over to him, and Taehyung’s heart broke as he realised he might have gone through all that alone without knowing what was happening.
“You, uh- you collapsed in the street, and were taken in an ambulance. Your appendix had burst so they had… they had to take you right into surgery to get it out.” He answered him, filling him in from what he’d been told.
“Surgery…” He mumbled, eyebrows scrunching up, barely shifting before he winced in pain. “Fuck… Okay, yeah. I feel it.” Yoongi hissed, trying to let himself relax again. “That explains it, I guess.”
Taehyung stayed silent, watching him for a few seconds before he spoke up again. “Hyung…” He started, biting on his lower lip, before releasing it. “I’m so sorry, I didn’t- I shouldn’t have said what I did.” He spoke, guilt flooding him once again. “I didn’t believe you, but I know you wouldn’t have lied about that. I don’t even have an excuse, I was just being an asshole. I shouldn’t have let you leave.”
There was a silence, Yoongi staring at him. It was scary, the way he couldn’t tell what he was thinking, or feeling. After so long together they knew each other inside out, but now he wasn’t sure what was going on in his mind. He cleared his throat, licking over his lower lip before he continued.
“I didn’t mean what I said. I don’t know why- why I said it, but you have to believe I’d never mean something like that. I love you so much, Yoongi. I’m sorry, I really am. I should have listened to you, but I just- I didn’t. I’m sorry.” He whispered, swallowing thickly and looking down.
There was another silence before a sigh rang through the room, and a hand placed gently over his own. “You’re an asshole,” Yoongi mumbled, and Taehyung had never been so happy to be called something unkind. “But it’s not your fault. I didn’t- I didn’t seem that bad. I didn’t think I was. It stopped for a bit, but as I was leaving…”
He sighed again, squeezing Taehyung’s hand weakly, who had lifted his gaze again to look up at him. “I’m just glad you’re here with me now, I wouldn't have wanted to wake up alone,” Yoongi mumbled, before a soft frown tugged at his lips. “Come on, stop looking at me like that.” He huffed.
But the younger couldn’t help it, not with how bad he felt about it all, how easily Yoongi was forgiving him. “You’re being too nice.” He complained in a whine, knowing how ridiculous it sounded. “Can’t you like… be mad at me?”
Yoongi only seemed amused by the request, letting out a soft huff since the act of actually laughing was too painful for now. “I am mad at you. I’m upset, both that you didn’t believe me and also at the way you reacted.” He admitted. “But I know I’ll forgive you at some point, so there’s no point expressing all that. I’m in a hospital bed, I just want you close. Just know that I’m not happy with you, silently.”
That was enough for Taehyung, for now at least. “Okay.” He said, softly, shifting as close as he could to the bedside. “I’m right here, don’t worry. And I’m gonna make sure that I make it up to you, I promise.” He told him determinedly, already thinking of anything and everything he could do.
“Mh, I know you will. You love me too much.” Yoongi murmured tiredly, despite having not long woke up, though it was understandable with how much his body had been through. “Kiss?” He asked quietly, eyes opening from when he’d briefly closed them.
Of course there was no denying him, so Taehyung stood from his chair a little, so he could lean over him. He tilted his head down to press their lips together in a gentle, yet sweet kiss. He let it linger for a while before he did pull back, heart melting at the sleepy smile Yoongi gave him. “Thank you.” The older boy mumbled.
“You don’t have to thank me, baby.” He chuckled, giving him a final one, before settling down in his chair again. “I love you, so much. Get some rest until a nurse comes by.” Taehyung told him quietly since he knew he had to call for one now, listening as Yoongi murmured a soft ‘I love you back’, his eyes closed.
----
It was a few days before Yoongi got out of the hospital, Taehyung being there every minute he could. He came right after work and left as late as he could, usually only because Yoongi pestered him and complained about how he needed to sleep. But they were both more than glad he’d be coming home, even if he couldn’t do anything more than he could in the hospital.
It took some time for them to get all the way up to the apartment, but soon enough Yoongi was settled in their bed, amongst the blankets and pillows Taehyung had prepared for them. And just as he was promised, Taehyung did everything he could for him. Even if Yoongi insisted that all he wanted was cuddles, Taehyung still went out of his way, preparing him nice snacks and meals and helping everywhere he could.
It took a couple of weeks until he was back to full health and able to move around completely on his own, and most importantly go back to work. He knew they were even tighter on money now since he hadn’t been able to work, but hopefully it would all figure itself out when he started getting paid again. Over the last few weeks they’d been making more fleeting comments about needing out of there, a new start, but they never discussed it properly… at least until Taehyung brought it up.
They had just finished eating, despite the late hour, and were settling down in bed. Yoongi was already curled up on his side, waiting for Taehyung to climb into bed with him. A light smile tugged up on his lips when he felt the bed dip, before Taehyung pressed against him from behind, chest to his back as he wrapped an arm around him. He gave a quiet hum, leaning back into the touch, though didn’t open his closed eyes. “Mh… Can I help you?” Yoongi murmured playfully.
Taehyung’s chest vibrated with a chuckle, pressing a light kiss to the others shoulder. “You certainly can.” He said back teasingly, nudging Yoongi’s stomach gently with his phone that he had in his hand, causing the older to open his eyes. “After. I want to show you something first.” He told him, moving the arm that was around him and also holding his phone a little, so Yoongi could see the screen. He clicked on where he wanted to go, silently presenting it to the older.
He didn’t seem to understand at first, eyes focused on the screen, studying the pictures of all the different rooms as Taehyung scrolled through them. “It’s a nice neighbourhood, nicer than here anyway.” He spoke, quietly. “The rent isn’t much more than it is for this place, and the house is so much better. I also checked, and there’s… jobs, in that area. Pay so much better, we wouldn’t need two jobs each just to live.”
Yoongi stayed silently as he took in the words, slowly understanding what he was trying to say, but his mind wasn’t processing properly. “Baby?” Taehyung called out to him, sounding a little apprehensive, the screen off since he’d shown everything. The older man shifted slightly, turning himself around in Taehyung’s arms so that he was facing him.
“You…” He said, pausing to lick over his lower lip before he continued. “You mean what I think you mean, right?” Yoongi asked, watching him carefully. “You want- you want this place, for… us?”
The younger hummed quietly, giving a small nod, obviously a little unsure about his boyfriend's reaction. “Yeah… I thought it’s about time we get out of here, you know? It’s time for a change. Two jobs each that barely covers what we need isn’t healthy for either of us, we need out of here. And this… this could be it.”
Yoongi smiled softly, not able to help but reach up, pressing a kiss to his cheek. “You’re serious? No jokes?” He asked when he’d pulled back again, receiving a nod in confirmation, and the look on his face told him enough. “This could be our home.” He whispered, biting lightly on his lower lip. “Just ours.”
Taehyung laughed, leaning forward to give a soft kiss to Yoongi’s lips. “Could be our home, baby.” He mumbled. “We could… have more time together, probably be happier. Wouldn’t have to work so much…” He said, to which Yoongi enthusiastically nodded.
“Yes.” He said, eyes bright with joy. “Yes. I want that. I want anything with you, but I want… I want that for us. We can look into it tomorrow?” He suggested, eager at the thought of a better life for them. Taehyung smiled at how excited he was about the idea, shifting to put his phone down, so he could wrap Yoongi up properly in his arms.
“I love you. So much.” The younger said fondly, leaning down to press another gentle kiss to Yoongi’s lips. “Gonna get a nice house, get more time with you. We could even get pets like we’ve always talked about.”
Yoongi hummed, eyes remaining closed even after the kiss, melting into his arms. He knew he’d feel at home anywhere, as long as he was in Taehyung’s arms, but he couldn’t help picture a happier life for the two of them. “I love you too, Tae. Forever and always.” He murmured.
“Forever and always. Just us.” The other replied softly, lips pressed to his forehead.