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It was a beautiful spring day. Shen Yuan was quite enjoying his afternoon, snacking on something Binghe had packed him, lounging under a cherry tree with Chu Wanning. The older man had a lunch break between classes, so the two of them had taken to silently hanging out in the campus gardens during their downtime.
It was a nice time, a friendship built on the need for solace, and a solidarity when faced with their… high energy boyfriends. This hour was meant for peace and quiet, and in no way for the way Shang Qinghua shrieked as he threw himself in front of the two.
“Guys, guys! My pals, my bros, mis amigos-”
“What,” Shen Yuan snapped, brow twitching. Next to him, Chu Wanning let out a measured breath, somehow keeping his cool.
“What is it, Shang Qinghua?”
“No need to be so rude Cucumber bro-”
“I told you to stop calling me that-”
Chu Wanning cleared his throat, effectively pausing their quarreling.
Shen Yuan never failed to feel embarrassed when his temper flared, remembering how much older this laoshi was. But then he’d stomp down that embarrassment, remembering Chu Wanning had an even worse temper when provoked. Plus the man couldn’t even do his own laundry; thank god Mo Ran was basically a professional housekeeper.
It was nothing like how Luo Binghe doted on Shen Yuan. Shen Yuan was perfectly capable of taking care of himself, okay? Just, when you had a guy willing to do it all for you, it was easy to get lazy, okay? Okay.
Anyway, back to the current moment, aka Shang Qinghua crashing their lunch, and for what?
“I just found this great idea for our next youtube videos!”
Shen Yuan snapped again, “Our videos? Since when do we do videos together?”
Shang Qinghua rolled his eyes but plowed on. “God okay we all do videos separately. I just think it would be funny if we all tried this!”
“Alright, what is it?” Chu Wanning asked, reluctantly putting down the box of sweets Mo Ran undoubtedly baked for him.
“Look!”
Shang Qinghua shoved his phone in their faces, bouncing in excitement. Open was a list of trending videos, and near the top was the title “Ignoring my boyfriend prank.” Shen Yuan was instantly intrigued. Chu Wanning frowned but didn’t outright shoot it down, so Shang Qinghua continued to explain.
“So it’s a prank where you have to ignore your boyfriend for as long as possible. You hide a camera somewhere, and then no matter what they do, you can’t interact with them in any way. It’s hilarious and so on brand for you guys? And you know how trends work, you gotta jump on the train when it’s still speeding or else you’ll miss your shot and-”
“Okay, we get it.”
Shen Yuan sat back, lips pursed in silence. As much as he didn’t want to admit it, it did sound like a good video idea. Luo Binghe would probably flip out at the first sign of a cold shoulder. It made a tiny, vindictive part of him smile.
“I’ll do it. I think it would actually be kind of funny. Binghe’s so sticky it'll drive him nuts.”
“That’s the spirit bro!” Shang Qinghua gave him an enthusiastic high five. Shen Yuan turned to Chu Wanning.
“What do you think, laoshi?”
Chu Wanning scowled, phoenix eyes narrowed dangerously. That was his thinking face. He was actually considering it. For all the hard ass this laoshi pretended to be, he was incredibly soft for his boyfriend. No way he could possibly…
“I will… try it. Explain this challenge again, Shang Qinghua. Slowly and the important parts only. Be concise, like I taught you.”
Shang Qinghua paled just a bit. “Yes laoshi. So, here’s what you do…”
Shen Yuan had everything planned out. There were three cameras planted around the apartment, to give some angle variety when editing later. Despite acting nonchalant earlier, Shen Yuan was actually kinda excited for this prank.
Luo Binghe was many great things. Being mindful of personal space was not one of those things. That boy was the definition of sticky.
Too clingy, just way too clingy! From dawn to dusk, if Shen Yuan was nearby, Luo Binghe wouldn’t be far behind. Always nipping at his heels, calling him “shizun” this and “shizun” that, trapping him in strong arms and a muscled chest… Not that Shen Yuan liked it or anything…
That was why this would be the perfect prank. On countless occasions, Shen Yuan just wanted to ignore Luo Binghe’s whining, but he didn’t want to be cruel. But this was the perfect excuse! Just a fun little prank, to show Luo Binghe what it’d really be like to be ignored, to emphasize just how grateful he should be that Shen Yuan always indulged him.
His boyfriend was out on his evening run, giving him ample time to prepare. The cameras were centered around the bedroom, with one extra hidden in the kitchen. More than likely Binghe would pout in the kitchen after getting ignored. Maybe he’d even make those lemon cookies he really liked…
Not the point! Focus Shen Yuan!
The cameras planted and recording, Shen Yuan took his place on the bed (yes, because he was totally going to lay down during this challenge). Luo Binghe had sent him an “on my way!” text nearly 10 minutes ago, which meant he was long overdue for his grand entrance.
The apartment door clicked open and Shen Yuan scrambled for his phone. He settled on his side, away from the door, directly facing one of the hidden cameras. Luo Binghe’s voice rang through the apartment, announcing a chorus of “I’m home!” and “Shizun, where are you?”
He hated being called “shizun.” Binghe did it just to mess with him. You act as an assistant martial arts instructor for one year and suddenly you’re a shizun for life. Ridiculous! Then the hall echoed with rapid steps and Shen Yuan focused on his phone. Which was off. Okay, he unlocked the screen, pulled up a random page, and then fake focused on his phone.
Just in time for the bedroom door to swing open, revealing a smiling, sweaty Luo Binghe.
“There you are. You napping?”
Luo Binghe strolled to the side of the bed, plopping down by Shen Yuan’s legs. His boyfriend let out a sound of surprise, seeing Shen Yuan fully awake and on his phone.
“Oh, did you find a new novel?” Luo Binghe laughed. “Is it any good?”
His question was genuine, always so interested in whatever Shen Yuan was into at the moment. A hand landed on one of his calves, massaging the muscle softly, in that absent minded way Luo Binghe always touched him.
Shen Yuan had to bite his cheek to keep from reacting. As the silence dragged on, Luo Binghe shifted, and he just knew there was a fake pout on that handsome face.
“Shizun, are you ignoring me?”
His voice took on a whiny tone and Luo Binghe crawled over him on all fours, absolutely demanding Shen Yuan’s attention. He kept his eyes firmly on his phone and his mouth shut, no matter how bad he wanted to scold Binghe to at least shower first.
“Shizun’s book must be really good, huh?”
Luo Binghe rested his chin on Shen Yuan’s arm. His voice was soft and coaxing, perfectly giving off kicked puppy vibes. He couldn’t do this! Shen Yuan dropped his phone and shut his eyes, taking a deep, steadying breath. The adamant silence that followed made Luo Binghe hesitate. The man soon crawled off of him and kneeled by the bedside instead.
“Sorry, did I bother you too much? I just wanted a welcome home kiss, that’s all.”
Though Luo Binghe chuckled, there was a strain in his tone. Once again, his statements were answered with silence. It went on even longer this time, Luo Binghe’s warmth hovering by his bedside. Shen Yuan wondered if it really felt so heavy, this quiet, or if he imagined it.
“A-Yuan, are you actually mad at me?” Luo Binghe sounded genuinely concerned at this point, any hint of teasing gone.
Shen Yuan kept his eyes shut tight. He knew if he opened them, Luo Binghe would be staring at him with those big doe eyes, shimmering with heartfelt sentiments and whatnot. Hell, he might even have some of those on-demand tears gathering on his long lashes. Nope! No way was he looking!
Luo Binghe continued to whine and prod, flipping between teasing and genuine concern. The one-sided conversation tapered off as he got no reactions. Finally, the man sighed and stood up, murmuring some vague apology about being a bother.
“I’ll just let you rest then. Let me know if you need anything.”
Shen Yuan kept his breath steady in the face of his boyfriend’s dejection, enduring a soft kiss on the cheek and the soft footfalls as Luo Binghe retreated.
Once it was clear that his boyfriend was a safe distance away, Shen Yuan let out a harsh breath, rolling on the bed in frustration. That exchange couldn’t have been more than 5 minutes! Why was this so difficult?! Luo Binghe was just too good at being pitiful, and Shen Yuan was a weak, weak man.
Needing a quick pick me up, Shen Yuan retrieved his fallen phone and opened up the group chat.
#Immortal Bro Squad
[Peerless bro, 6:32 pm] SOS
[Airplane bro, 6:33 pm] bro!! did you crack already?!
[Peerless bro, 6:33 pm] Of course not!
[Mr. Chu~, 6:35 pm] Then what’s the matter?
[Peerless bro, 6:37 pm] he’s just...really really pitiful. Even I have a heart sometimes, yknow?
[Airplane bro, 6:37 pm] sounds fake but ok
[Mr. Chu~, 6:39 pm] If it’s beginning to truly affect your emotions, perhaps it’s best to discontinue.
[Airplane bro, 6:39 pm] no way!! thats all part of the prank laoshi! ppl love seeing emotional turmoil!
[Peerless bro, 6:41 pm] As much as I hate to agree… he’s got a point. Binghe’s dramatics are exactly what’ll make this entertaining. I just… need to endure…
[Mr. Chu~, 6:42 pm] As long as you’re sure, then carry on. We’re both looking to follow your lead, after all.
[Airplane bro, 6:43 pm] yeah laoshi!!
[Airplane bro, 6:43 pm] wait wat do u mean both of us i never agreed to this
[Mr. Chu~, 6:44 pm] Shang Qinghua.
[Airplane bro, 6:44 pm] yes laoshi understood i am Also doing the prank.
[Airplane bro, 6:44 pm] good luck cucumber bro knock em dead cuz yknow i wont!
Shen Yuan rolled his eyes, not bothering to respond with more than a thumbs up emoji.
Sufficiently encouraged, he made himself comfortable on the bed once more, ready to wait this out. By now, he could hear things clattering in the kitchen, meaning his guess of Binghe stress baking was spot on. He couldn’t wait to review the kitchen camera footage...
He snapped out of his b-roll daydream with the sound of approaching footsteps. Shen Yuan schooled his features, directing a deadpan stare at the ceiling, hands casually folded over his stomach.
He was in the zone, he could do this, he could totally—
“Shizun, this lowly disciple has brought you something special.”
—Not do this. He could not do this at all. Warning sirens blared in his mind. That way of speaking, that sickeningly sweet saccharine tone…
Shen Yuan’s heart sped up in panic. Part of the prank rules demanded he couldn’t look at his boyfriend, he couldn’t react at all, but this… this was an emergency. So he broke the rules and spared a quick glance at Luo Binghe. And promptly cursed up a silent storm. They were so getting demonetized!
Luo Binghe stood at the edge of the bed, holding a tray of those fucking delicious lemon cookies… buck ass naked, save for the frilly little apron Shen Yuan had gotten him as a gag gift.
A gag gift that had backfired tremendously when Luo Binghe figured out that wearing it was almost better than lingerie at times.
Luo Binghe perked up noticing the eyes on him. Shen Yuan quickly looked away, but not before seeing him put the tray down. He felt the bed dip again and a warm weight covered his calf. His boyfriend meant to crawl over him on all fours, a scandalous imitation of what he’d done earlier.
“Bingbing just wants to know what he did wrong. Shizun can punish him after…”
“Luo Binghe!”
Shen Yuan finally snapped, sitting up and keeping Luo Binghe at bay with a socked foot to his bare shoulder. But looking at the man was a mistake, and he wasn’t talking about the apron. Luo Binghe’s lips pouted out, the bottom trembling slightly. His cheeks were flushed, brows furrowed, and as Shen Yuan finally made eye contact…
Oh no. There they were. The tears. Those damn tears with those big puppy dog eyes!
His resolve wavered in the face of those tears. Shen Yuan felt his face grow hotter, his lips clamped shut in his effort to not react. But his poker face failed him, as Luo Binghe’s lip quirked, fleetingly, before settling back into his (fake!) pout.
“Would shizun like me to take the apron off?”
Luo Binghe eyes widened innocently, a scam, as he reached back with one hand to tease the ties of his apron. Shen Yuan couldn’t take it anymore. More than that, if Luo Binghe actually began undressing, they really couldn’t use this footage in a video. He jolted forward, wrestling Luo Binghe’s arms away from the danger zone.
“No! God, no, Binghe stop!” Shen Yuan sighed and manhandled his boyfriend around. “Look over there.”
Binghe frowned, staring at the bookshelf Shen Yuan directed him at. Shen Yuan pushed him off the bed and toward the shelf, making his boyfriend search around.
“No, behind that… to the left… yeah, there you go.”
“A camera?” Luo Binghe pulled back, camera in hand, visibly confused.
“Surprise. You’ve been pranked,” Shen Yuan announced with a lackluster rendition of jazz hands.
Luo Binghe stared dumbly a moment longer before recognition sparked in those dark eyes. “The ‘ignore your boyfriend’ prank?”
“Yup,” he drawled, popping the ‘p’ just to be obnoxious. Most of this would be lost footage anyways, with Binghe’s ass all the way out like that. Maybe they could save it with some blurring? Black censorship bars?
His musings were once again interrupted, by none other than his unfairly attractive and ultra sticky boyfriend. Luo Binghe climbed back on the bed, this time managing to crawl over him with minimal protest.
Those eyes filled with tears again, but they glistened with mischief as well. “A-Yuan is so mean. You almost hurt my feelings.”
“Your first solution was to get naked!” Shen Yuan swatted at a muscled bicep, affronted, even as he slowly sunk back into the pillows below.
“Well. It worked.” Luo Binghe smirked, caging him in on the bed.
“You’re not wrong…”
He grumbled a few more complaints, but still accepted the kiss Luo Binghe pressed to his lips. Shen Yuan meant it to be chaste, but it was never up to him apparently. Luo Binghe, that little beast, pressed deeper, turning it wet and heated in a matter of seconds. Shen Yuan was left way too hot and bothered for his fluffy lounge sweater.
Then, suddenly, Luo Binghe pulled back, leaving him chasing after those lips on instinct. Luo Binghe smiled at the action, dangerous, and Shen Yuan huffed. His smile softened as he sat up, kneeling on the bed.
“I really did make dinner. We should eat while it’s warm. Unless…”
“What.” ShenYuan snapped, not liking his coy tone.
“Unless shizun wants to eat something else?”
Luo Binghe lifted the frilly edge of his apron, revealing even more muscled thigh. Shen Yuan promptly felt his face go red and he grabbed a pillow, lobbing it at his boyfriend.
“Shameless! Get out! Out!”
[Airplane bro, 9:45 pm] so…. bro…. how did it go??
[Airplane bro, 10:53 pm] ….bro….?
[Mr. Chu~, 11:01 pm] Shen Yuan.
[Peerless bro, 11:35 pm] Yes, hello, I am alive and Fine.
[Airplane bro, 11:36 pm] how did the prank go? did he CRY
[Peerless bro, 11:37 pm] Yup, the prank was perfect. No problems at all. Just a good ol’ wholesome prank that we can all laugh about later.
[Mr. Chu~, 11:40 pm] That’s good to hear.
[Airplane bro, 11:41 pm] yeah!! so laoshi ur totally doing it next
[Peerless bro, 11:41 pm] For once I agree. Laoshi, I think you could get some funny reactions from Mo Ran.
[Mr. Chu~, 11:45 pm] So there were no mishaps?
[Peerless bro, 11:51 pm] None beyond the usual. Though everyone is different… it should be fine tho.
[Airplane bro, 11:52 pm] it’s decided then! laoshi will commence phase 2 tomorrow!
[Airplane bro, 11:52 pm] if thats ok with laoshi ofc…
[Mr. Chu~, 11:58 pm] Fine.
[Airplane bro, 11:59 pm] :)))))
[Peerless bro, 11:59 pm] :))))
[Mr. Chu~, 12:00 am] Stop that.