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Chapter Text

The shadow souls of the Zodiac spirits were weakening. The promise they made so long ago had become diluted and almost unrecognizable. They were now monsters trapped inside shells. Their minds laced with dark and bitter thoughts. Their "eternity" had become miserable and most thought that misery was inescapable. Kyo allowed those dark and bitter thoughts to fuel his self-hatred. He was the outcast and looked down upon by every member of the family. He was the sacrificial lamb meant to make them feel better. But, when Tohru Honda arrived, the very foundation of the Sohma belief system crumbled. The final threads of the bond began to break once Akito realized she could let go. That she no longer had to be God.

The day they were freed, the Sohmas felt a mixture of emotions. Suddenly, for the very first time, they were within their own bodies. There was no force telling them how to feel or who to be loyal to. There was nothing left to alienate them from society. But the bond had also been a piece of them that they had just lost. They cried. Then they remembered another missing piece.

Akito asked Tohru when she was visiting her in the hospital, what she could do to make it up to her. Tohru, of course, did not blame Akito for anything. They had both been caught in a whirlwind and neither of them could see straight. Instead, Tohru offered Akito her hand as a sign of good faith. Akito took it. But, a little later, Tohru did say she had one request: that her memories of the Sohma family be erased.

Tohru once said she wanted to live with the good and the bad. But, that was before the accident. After, she couldn't bear the bad. Tohru knew what it was like to love. She had loved her mom, and they were always together, even if it was only in her memory. She clung to that love. It was the most important thing to her. Until that awkward boy, with wild ginger hair and an even wilder temper, showed her a different kind of love. This kind of love had her lost in an amazement she couldn't quite explain. There was a tenderness there more tangible than the memory of Kyoko. Which scared Tohru, and, ultimately, came to destroy her.

It was selfish. Tohru knew that. She knew that, to some extent, she would be abandoning all the friends she had made within the Sohma clan. She thought, maybe, she could train herself to smile and forget how badly her heart hurt. But every time she closed her eyes all she saw was Kyo standing in the rain disillusioned by her confession. The more she saw it the more she wanted to forget it.

There was a big row, not only between Tohru and Akito but among the adult members of the family. Hatori suggested she go of another MRI. Ayame had to be barred in a room away from any phone as he threatened to call Yuki. Shigure, who's opinion Akito held above anyone else, simply said if it is what Tohru wanted, let her have it. Akito agreed. Hatori refused. But, eventually, Hatori understood that Tohru was feeling an unshakeable sadness similar to Kana.

While it was argued that there should be some warning given, Tohru didn’t want anyone else to know until it was already over. The Sohmas came and went from her hospital room and never had any suspicions. Everyone honestly thought that Tohru and Kyo would work it out. They were caught in the worst kind of misunderstanding but that did not mean Kyo could not step up and fix things once he saw her. Kyo, however, never even got to see Tohru before it happened.

Uo and Hana were told just hours before that, once Tohru left the Sohma General Hospital, she would not recall her time with the family. Instead, she would remember an apartment she had got all on her own. An apartment that was all set up and ready for her to go home to. Uo objected and thought she was being rash. But, Hana couldn't see passed the turmoil coursing through Tohru's mind. She winced and became teary-eyed at the mention of Kyo's name. If Tohru wished to forget, perhaps they should let her.

Finding out the Tohru they knew and loved was gone was one of the most painful things the Zodiac had endured. Most of them had spent their entire lives learning to live with loss and had experienced every stage of grief one hundred times over. But it didn’t make it any easier. She was also the most resilient person any of them knew. It was almost impossible to understand her choice.

Nonetheless, they chose to respect it.

Overnight, the boys Tohru had once spent countless hours with soon became strangers. Haru and Momoji were suddenly just lowerclassmen. Yuki once again became the mysterious Prince. Sometimes, members of Prince Yuki Fan Club would ask Tohru what happened to their friendship and she would assure them they were mistaken since she never even spoke to him before. Uo and Hana would never let anyone push past that.

Tohru had once asked Yuki to still be friends if her memory was erased, but he knew it wasn’t safe. Like Momiji’s mother, Tohru’s memories weren’t actually gone but repressed. Therefore, even being around Tohru, ran the risk of her remembering.

Kyo removed himself from Kaibara and enrolled in another high school entirely. Yuki had, quite calmly, explained that Tohru’s connection to him was too strong. That kind of connection, despite being repressed, doesn’t just go away. It was a sacrifice Kyo would have to make if he wanted Tohru to be happy. Kyo complied.

Kyo could have been ostracized by the family worse than he ever had been before. He knew that. Everyone loved Tohru in their own way. She was so kind-hearted and her warmth radiated like the sun. Tohru was precious to everyone. He wondered if they pitied him. Not only was he the former cat, but he had lost almost everything. It was a good guess. Even Uo and Hana, despite only trying to protect her, had apologized to him for not letting him see Tohru sooner. They wished things had turned out different. He did too. He didn’t think the last time he saw Tohru would actually be the last. Without closing his eyes he could see her fingertips reaching for his cheek and feel her shallow breath on his lips.

When he was still possessed by the cat spirit, Kyo had accepted the fact that he would be confined. All he wanted was to spend what little time he had remaining with Tohru. When Akito told Kyo he was free he couldn't help but think of his future with Tohru. Now that future was gone. A long time ago, Kazuma Sohma thought if Kyo lost Tohru he would never recover. But, Tohru had written a letter to each member of the Zodiac to say goodbye and good luck. The longest letter was to Kyo. She urged him to live life to the fullest. No longer cursed as the cat, Kyo could go wherever he wanted. Tohru wanted him to follow his dreams. She did not want him to blame himself for her choice. She hoped, even if her mom said she wouldn’t forgive him, he could eventually forgive himself. Kyo wanted to do that for her.

The moment he graduated, Kyo went as far away as he could from Tokyo, to become a disciple at another dojo. He worked hard. He learned and taught others. Soon the years without Tohru overtook the number Kyo had spent by her side. He thought about all the things she had said and now forgotten. He put himself to sleep at night remembering everything. He sometimes wondered if she'd changed as time passed. Tohru's kindness was unshakeable but had she overcome her mother's death? Did she still get embarrassed about the strangest things? Kyo knew he was tormenting himself by asking things he'd never find the answer to. He never expected to see Tohru again.

So, imagine Kyo’s surprise when he saw her standing at a bus stop in Takayama so late at night.

Chapter Text

Kyo stopped in his tracks on the sidewalk. Standing under the glow of the street light she looked like a spectre. Kyo had been haunted by the memory of Tohru Honda for so long he thought he might be seeing things now. However, as two men walked towards him and passed her, one of them accidentally brushed the paper shopping bag she was carrying. The man apologized and she waved her free hand as she assured the stranger not to worry then followed up with a little bow.

As he looked on, Kyo could feel his chest tighten. Suddenly, with Tohru in front of him, it was like he was seventeen all over again. Although they had not met for several years, she looked like she hadn’t aged a day. She was still petite and her brunette hair still fell to her waistline. As she spoke, each word was still as sweet as honey.

So, she was real.

Yet, that still didn’t answer the question of what she was doing at a bus stop in Takayama. As far as Kyo knew, the Sohma family still kept tabs on Tohru. Just in case Hatori needed to step in again. Apparently, she still lived in the apartment they got her in Tokyo. Kyo was sure Akito knew when Tohru sneezed. So why had no one warned him?

Alarm bells were ringing in his head. Kyo thought about turning around and allowing her to board the bus and disappear into the night. He would catch the next one. However, as he looked down at his watch he realized there was no next one. Which meant a long walk home after an already exhausting day at the dojo. Kyo groaned and flipped his hood up over his head. He was sure if he kept it up and kept his distance everything would be fine. Maybe enough time had passed that whatever connection Yuki thought was so strong had faded. Unfortunately, that thought only made Kyo’s chest tighten even more.

Kyo stood a good ten feet away from her as they waited. He couldn’t help but steal glances. Given the chance, Kyo would just stand and study her forever. Tohru, as absent-minded as ever, did not seem to notice when his eye lingered on her for a little too long. As the arrival time of the bus drew closer more late-night workers gathered on the sidewalk. Soon enough, she was blocked from his periphery by the pillars of people.

When the bus arrived Kyo swiped his transit pass and hurried to find a seat. He stuffed his bag under the seat in front of him and waited for her to board. She was a few rows ahead of him and with every stop, he hoped she get off. But, as the bus became more and more empty, she remained where she was. 

As they continued to ride along Kyo went through all the reasons as to why she might be so far away from home. Maybe she was touring the area. The historical district did have merchant houses dating back to the Edo Period. There were plenty of scenic views and an Onsen. But, the biannual festival, the peak time for tourists, was still weeks away. She certainly wasn’t visiting family since there were hardly any Hondas left.

And who’s fault is that?

Kyo swallowed hard. He thought he would be able to honour Tohru’s wish and forgive himself. But he always seemed to start in the wrong place and end up back with Kyoko as the life drained from her eyes and she uttered those dying words. He let Kyoko die and Tohru was left an orphan. He fell so desperately in love and was reckless with Tohru’s emotions. He had hurt her to the point of no return. How was any of that forgivable?

He realized, in his state of anxiety, his one leg was shaking rapidly. He pressed his heel into the ground and took a deep breath. He flexed his clammy hands he had been holding in fists. Kyo knew he needed to calm down or else he’d start drawing attention to himself. It would all be over soon enough.

Finally, they had arrived at Kyo's stop. The bus had hardly come to a halt as Kyo got up and moved for the closest exit. With a sigh of relief, he stuffed his hands in his pockets and stalked off towards his building. As he rolled pieces of lint in his pocket between his fingers Kyo remembered his hands shouldn’t be so empty.

He had left his bag on the bus. Everything was in that bag. His keys, his wallet, and his Karategi. Now, on top of everything, Kyo had to chase down a stupid bus.

Kyo took off. He figured, if he could not beat the bus to the next stop, he could maybe catch it at the one after. He was right and got there just has it pulled in. With a heaving breath, he went to grab it but instead ran smack into someone trying to get off. Kyo clenched his teeth. Even after being free for so long he sometimes still worried the day would come where he would once again disappear into a cloud of smoke and come out a cat.

“Watch it!” Kyo hissed as if it was not his own fault.

A little yelp escaped the person he had run into. “I’m sorry!”

Kyo clenched his teeth harder. It was, of course, Tohru. Her arms were practically stuck against his sweaty chest as he grabbed her shoulders to steady her. It was almost laughable that the only time he had held her since the curse was broken was an accident. Kyo shook his head and practically shoved her away to create some sort of distance between them. She was still apologizing as she locked eyes with him and gasped.

 “Is everything alright?” the driver called after them as he idled curbside.

“Sorry,” Kyo mumbled at her then cleared his throat as he changed his attention to the driver. “Yeah, I just need to get my bag. I left it on here a few stops ago.”

Kyo slipped passed Tohru and back on to the bus. Thankfully, his bag and all his belongings were still there. He hoped Tohru had scampered off to wherever she was going while he looked but she was in the same spot he left her. She didn’t look like she had some wild epiphany about who he was, however.

As the bus pulled away Kyo fought the urge to say anything else to her. He could almost hear Akito chastising him. His best option was to walk away and keep on walking. He never guessed he would have to turn away from her again. Every step it felt like he was lifting cinder blocks instead of feet. For a moment he considered turning back around 

Then, he heard her voice echo after him. “Excuse me!”  

Chapter Text

Tohru had no idea what she was doing or what was wrong with her. She knew better than to chase after someone in the middle of the night. Particularly someone who was just minding their own business. There was just something very familiar about him. Although, Tohru was sure she'd never seen him before in her life.

She couldn't control the breath that escaped her lips when she met his gaze. Tohru had never seen such pretty orange eyes before. She would not have even guessed they were natural if not for the matching mop of hair escaping from underneath his hood. What a beautiful stranger. Wait, is it rude to think a man was beautiful? Tohru's mind raced as she thought about how potentially inappropriate it was to even think it. She was thinking so hard she practically jumped when the driver asked if they were all right.

When the man swept by her to retrieve his bag he smelt of sweat but also cedar. The mixture of scents made her feel warm for some reason. Like she had known it a long time ago. Tohru sighed to herself. Perhaps she was just overtired and overthinking. She knew she could just walk away. But for whatever reason, she remained rooted where she was.

The man actually looked annoyed to see her there when he got back off the bus. He didn't say anything else to her before walking away. Not even a polite departing remark. Tohru was meant to go the opposite direction yet her feet seemed to want to follow him.

"Excuse me!" Tohru was surprised to hear her own voice calling after him.

The man didn't turn around but Tohru was sure he heard her. She quickened her pace until she was almost at his heels. She reached out for his jacket but, almost as if he sensed it, he quickly whipped his head around. Tohru skidded to a halt to avoid running into him again.

"Can I help you?" He asked flatly.

"Oh…that is..uh…" Tohru placed her fingertips on her lips and stared at him blankly. The man turned his back on her again and continued on. Tohru, who was being stubborn for no reason, continued on with him. He didn't even glance her way as her footstep fell in sync with his. "Do you…live in the area?"

He grunted which she assumed meant yes.

"Have you lived here long?"

Another grunt. But, then he took her by surprise by quietly asking his own question. "Are you new to town?"

"Yes!" Tohru replied. "I just moved here!"

"Why?"

Tohru furrowed her brow, "Well...that is..."

"Never mind," He cut her off, "it doesn't matter."

"Oh...okay," Tohru mumbled. In truth, Tohru did not really want to say why she had moved to Takayama. It was a decision she did not know how to live with quite yet. But, it did hurt her feelings that he was so dismissive. She wondered why.

Tohru continued to walk with him in silence after that. She knew she was going to have to turn around and go home eventually but she wasn't sure how to explain she was three blocks up from the last stop. Is this considered stalking? Tohru asked herself. They did not know each other. She didn't even know his name. She had not told him her name. Now that was rude and inappropriate!

"I'm terribly sorry I never introduced myself!" She exclaimed, breaking the silence. "My name is Tohru Honda."

She drew her eyes up to the man's face. He looked like he was deep in thought. Was he considering whether or not he should tell her his name? Tohru could tell she was aggravating him but she did not know why. Perhaps he had a long day? Or maybe he was shy? Not everyone was a people person. She should not expect someone she was clearly imposing upon to introduce themselves. But, she wished he would.

Tohru had abandoned Tokyo because she was miserable. Uo had moved away after graduation and Hana travelled for work frequently. The three of them spoke on the phone as much as they could but not nearly enough. Tohru was also estranged from her only living family. Most of the time the only company she had was…

She shook her head to herself.

It was better not to think about it. Tohru had hoped for a fresh start in a new city with new people. But she had been quite lonely in Takayama too. She had tried very hard to make friends but no one seemed interested. This man included. Tohru could feel her cheek becoming hot. She knew she should take the hint and get out of there.

"I'm sorry," Tohru stopped walking. "I think I got my directions mixed up...I believe my building is the other direction..."

The man also paused and stared at her in confusion. Tohru thought it was one of her better (very rare) lies. Who wouldn't get turned around in a new town at least once or twice? But maybe the awkward air between them was enough for him to see through it. Tohru gave a weak wave and began backing up. But, before she could turn on her heels and make and clean getaway, he groaned.

"Kyo."

Tohru blinked. "What?"

"My name is Kyo."

Tohru could not help but notice he did not give his last name. She did not know if she felt comfortable referring to him without it but he clearly did not want to share it. She thought she should be grateful she got at least that much out of him. Tohru smiled at him "It is nice to meet you, Kyo-kun!"

"Kyo is fine," the man, again, looked annoyed.

Tohru was not used to not using honorifics. "Are you sure?"

"Yes." Kyo practically rolled his eyes.

"Do you take the bus home a lot…Kyo..?" Tohru asked

He nodded.

"Then I guess I'll see you around?”

The corner of his mouth twitched. She did not notice the small smile looked almost sad, however. She really was very distracted by his hair. Tohru noted that it was very similar to her mother's. Although, Kyoko's colour came from a box.

"I guess so." He replied.

Tohru gave Kyo one last smile as she finally turned to walk toward her building. The encounter between the two was definitely peculiar and she could not quite put her finger on why that was. However, the more she thought about it, the more she hoped she would see him again very soon.

Chapter Text

Kyo slammed the door to his apartment and leaned up against it with a sigh. Stupid, stupid, stupid! That is what he was. He damn well knew better and he still went and did it. Of course, he didn’t want her to walk away, but she needed to for both their sakes. He was going to let her go. But, the moment she went to leave, and Kyo saw the hurt she was trying to mask with that meek wave, it was all over for him.

He had never been able to deny Tohru anything that would make her smile. Kyo could not help himself. Who did it hurt if she knew his first name? When he said it, it seemed like enough proof that time and distance really had done Tohru a favour. He wished he could say the same.

The accident had left both physical and emotional scars on Tohru. Kyo knew that. Yet, in choosing to forget him, Tohru had left marks on him as well. It was not something he could move on from overnight. Kyo had spent years tending to his wounds. He knew he would never fully recover from what had passed. But, he had done well at fooling himself into thinking he could. Kyo could say he was at least in a better place than before.

Then, just like that, the wounds reopened.

It was agony to be near her again. To walk with her again and have it feel so awkward. To hear Tohru speak his name again as though it had not fallen from her lips a hundred times before. Nothing was the same except her smile.

Kyo sometimes entertained the idea that, perhaps, in an alternate universe, they ended up together. In this universe, maybe things were good. Maybe they were still able to walk together, in a comfortable silence as they always had. Maybe the mundane things, like grocery shopping, were fun just because he was with her. Maybe Kyo’s name still had a special ring to it.

Or, maybe, there was an alternate universe where they had never crossed paths. Where they had never even touched let alone kissed. That universe seemed kinder than the one Kyo was living in. It was the one Tohru had been living in. It wasn’t fair to take that away from her now. Which is why Kyo most certainly did not plan on seeing her around.

Kyo planned on calling Shishou. He knew within a day his father could have him relocated to a new city, with a new dojo, and Tohru would be free of him. Maybe he could even go home. How long had it been since he had ventured into Tokyo? It was the largest city in the world and Kyo knew it was unlikely he would ever run into Tohru. But, he did not take any chances. Not for New Years. Not for the rat bastard’s wedding. Nothing.  

No one, aside from Shishou, visited him either. Which is what he preferred. He and Yuki were on civil terms and the head of the family tolerated him well enough. Kagura had become far less insufferable and Haru was always itching for another match. But, Kyo had no interest in being part of the family. In fact, after so many years on the outside looking in, he wasn’t sure he’d even know how to act.  

Tokyo was no longer home. Takayama was. Kyo had come out of his shell little by little and built a life there. Despite his lousy temper Kyo still drew people in and he had friends. He had a routine. He liked the dojo master and the people he taught. He liked his small Western-style apartment and the market he went to every Monday. Kyo did not want to leave where he felt he belonged. But how else could he protect Tohru?

Kyo reached for the landline but hesitated to pick it up. What’s one more day? Everything would be so rushed once the family found out what occurred. Delaying one day would give Kyo the opportunity to say goodbye to everything he had come to love about Takayama. He would be able to pack properly and line up another instructor for all the future classes he was supposed to be teaching. Moreover, despite how much it hurt, Kyo wanted to see Tohru just one more time. 

Chapter Text

It was rare for Yuki to be out before sun up but Akito had been blowing up his phone all night. According to her landlord, Tohru had apparently not been seen for several days. Akito knew Yuki would treat the situation with more urgency than any servants she sent to go check on Tohru’s place. So now, Yuki was standing alone in her apartment going over every scenario in his head.

Closet and cabinet doors were half shut, dresser drawers were open, and none of the lights had been turned off. The place looked ransacked. Or at least very similar to his home. Tohru had never been a messy person. Yuki didn’t think it was a habit she could develop over time either.

Neither Uo nor Hana had heard from Tohru. Although that was not unusual with their schedules. But, now her phone was turned off. Her work said she had not shown up for her last few shifts. Could she have been kidnapped? Was she being held for ransom and no one knew yet? No. That was a silly thought. There was at least one person who would have known by now.

As he circled the apartment Yuki scanned every surface. But, he could not find a picture of Kyoko anywhere. Which meant Tohru was gone and left in a hurry. But, it was on her own accord.

With a groan, Yuki fished his cell phone out of his pocket. Missed calls from Akito had piled up again. There were several texts from Shigure asking for updates, which was probably more for his own sake than for Tohru’s. Akito was more on edge than Yuki had seen her in a long time and Shigure was probably bearing the brunt of it. However, Yuki was more worried about how exactly they lost Tohru.

The Sohma family had been paying off Tohru’s landlord to be their little bird for years now. As far as Yuki knew, Akito was aware of almost everything going on in Tohru’s life. How was it the only indication that she was gone was when she missed the small monthly payment she made in rent? The information he received from the main house over the years gave him a few guesses as to why she had left. However, he had no idea where she had gone.

Surely the Sohmas were powerful enough to track her down. She must have made card transactions or been caught on a camera somewhere. Yuki guessed that within the week they would know exactly where Tohru was. There was no way she could just disappear without a trace. So, why was Akito so worried? Was it all over where Tohru could potentially end up?  

Out of all the places in Japan, the chances of Tohru ending up in Takayama were astronomical. There was a very good chance she was still in Tokyo even. But, should someone warn Kyo just in case?

Kyo had avoided almost any mention of Tohru since she chose to have her memory of the Sohmas erased. He moved away after graduation and had not returned since. He was apparently doing well for himself and moving forward. There were several things the former cat was unaware of and Yuki didn’t even know where to begin.

Perhaps it was better to wait. Yuki could only imagine what chaos would be unleashed if they filled Kyo in. That idiot could go off the rails for potentially no reason. Indeed, the family needed to do more investigating before anyone made that call.

Unfortunately, Yuki knew exactly where they had to start.

Chapter Text

Kyo could hear his heart beating in his ears as he stood by the bus stop. He had expected Tohru to beat him there like she had the night before. However, as he walked up she was nowhere in sight. Maybe she did not need to take the bus that night. He obviously did not know her schedule like he used to. With a huff, Kyo checked his watch. He still needed to call Shishou. Maybe Tohru not being there was a sign he should not have drawn things out.

Admittedly, Kyo had never been a patient person. It was a skill he had to learn over the years. Tohru had once been at the centre of those lessons but later on, it had become about his students. From the children to the adults Kyo had to learn how to control his emotions. As much of a bastard as Shigure was he had been correct about there being more power in the ability to hold back.

He could not remember a day he had not been in after sundown. Even in the summer when the days were longer. Kyo much preferred staying at the dojo until the last possible moment. Martial arts had always been his haven. Even on his days off, he was always itching to get into the dojo. There was once a time where he had cut back on training to spend more time at Shigure's house. But, in Takayama, there was no one to go home to or to spend more time with. Which he did not mind all too much.

Kyo had bonded with many of the students in his classes. Particularly the younger ones. There was something very satisfying about watching them grow and learn over the years and see the colours of their belts change. He would have liked to see them continue but it was simply not possible.

The dojo master was confused as hell. After years of working together, it came as a surprise that Kyo would leave with such short notice. The dojo master may have known Shishou but he didn't know much about the Sohmas or anything about the curse. No one but the inner circle of the family would ever understand how their world worked. No one would know the sacrifices the former zodiac members had to make.

Or the ones they continued to make.

"Hello!" Kyo practically sprang out of his skin when Tohru's voice came from behind him. When he turned around she was only a few inches away from him with a big smile on her face. "It's nice to see you again Kyo!"

Kyo could not help but return her smile and reply quietly, "You too."

"How was your day?" Tohru asked enthusiastically. "I don't think I ever got to ask what it is you do."

"I am a martial arts instructor," Kyo replied. Or at least he was a martial arts instructor.

Genuine excitement flashed across Tohru's face. "Oh, that is wonderful!"

Tohru really had not changed. She always showed enthusiasm for the things people loved even if she did not know much about it herself. Kyo was aware she had read up on martial arts when she lived with the Sohmas but did not know if that was something she had forgotten too. She probably just went back having a crappy jab punch.

"What do you do?" Kyo knew he should mind his business for his own sake but it would be rude not to ask her.

"Well…that is…I am between jobs right now!" Tohru replied. "I'm just doing odd cleaning jobs!"

Kyo could not help but think how unlike Tohru that was. If there was one thing she was very serious about it was work. Why would she move if she had no job? Moreover, Akito would secretly have something lined up for her. Did that mean they did not know she was in Takayama? He thought about asking why she was there just as the bus pulled into the stop. For a moment Kyo thought their conversation was over but Tohru stayed beside him as they walked towards the bus.

"Would you like to sit together Kyo?" Tohru asked, almost embarrassed, as he swiped his pass and she handed the driver her change.

Kyo nodded and let her have the window seat as they sat down. It was funny, how quickly every emotional response to Tohru just came flooding back. She made Kyo nervous but sitting in such proximity to her just felt right. He did not even care what they were making small talk about so long as he could see her gentle smile. Something that could not possibly happen again. He was lucky to have even this tiny allotment of time.

As the bus continued on Tohru chatted away. Kyo only really replied with a hmm or hah but she did not seem to mind all too much. Honestly, she just seemed happy to have someone to talk to. She must have been lonely in a new city so far away from the people who loved her. He thought maybe Tohru was going on about the weather but Kyo was too focused on taking in her every feature and remembering every moment. He could not help but glance at her hands, specifically the left, as she spoke.

One thing Kyo had always wondered was if Tohru had found someone else. He actually sincerely hoped she had. It would not be fair of him to wish otherwise. When he was still cursed Kyo had been ready to support any relationship Tohru chose to pursue. Even if the idea of it broke his heart. He had kept that same energy from the day she chose to forget him. Even Kyo had tried to move on. What would have been the point of being free if he did not try? Although, he kept that to himself for fear that Shishou (or worse, Ayame) would try to set him up with someone.

He thought it would be easier for her with no memory since it was hell with.

Kyo was lost in his own thoughts when he felt her hand on his arm. "Is this your stop?"

It certainly was. She must have remembered. However, Kyo could not bring himself to stand. Just a little bit longer, he told himself.

"I can get off when you do." Kyo shrugged. Tohru looked a little confused. But she did not object and went right back babbling. It seemed like only a short time later that they came to her stop.

As they got off Tohru pointed. "My building is just over there."

"I can walk you there if you'd like." Kyo offered but swore at himself in his head. Kyo had to remind himself that they did not know each other and he might seem like a predator.

Tohru however did not seem too concerned or even uncomfortable. He tried not to think about what could possibly happen to her if she was like this with every stranger she encountered. "Thank you!"

Her building was newer and in a very nice part of town. Kyo was honestly surprised. She had probably been taken aback by how expensive rent could be in Takayama after the Sohmas had secretly covered the majority of hers in Tokyo. She might have had a nest egg saved up but even so these apartments were a pretty penny. He wondered how she could afford it if she was only doing odd jobs at the moment. Kyo let out a low whistle to show how impressed he was.

"How'd you get in here?" He asked.

"Well…it was the only place I could really get in a pinch." Tohru sighed.

Kyo cocked his head to the side and studied her expression. Something was off. Why on earth would Tohru, nor the Sohmas, not have a job lined up for her? Why did she need an apartment in a pinch?

"Why did you move to Takayama?" Kyo finally asked.

Tohru looked down and fiddled with her hand before answering. "I uh…I just really needed to leave Tokyo."

So, she was running? But, from what…or who…was the real question. Kyo wondered if her horrible family had anything to do with it.

Stop wondering, Idiot. It was none of his business and curiosity killed the cat. But, he hated how quiet Tohru's voice got as she spoke. It sounded as though she was not sure what to make of her decision to leave Tokyo and all Kyo wanted to do was reassure her. No matter what it was.

Chapter Text

Yuki despised the man sitting across the table from him in the restaurant. Although, he had no good reason to. In fact, he was one of the people who had been there the most for Tohru since the accident. It was strange that he and Yuki had once been classmates and now he was almost unrecognizable. His once shaggy hair was now cut short and professional. His Kaibara uniform was now replaced by a very expensive, well-tailored suit.

The man's tie was loosened and the top button of his collared shirt was undone. He wreaked of alcohol like he had gone through several rounds prior to Yuki's arrival. His cigarette smoke filled the air around the booth and when he tapped it ash and ember followed. He looked defeated, yet Yuki had no sympathy for him.

Despite the fact that Yuki and Kyo had lived most of their lives in competition with one another he did feel sorry for the stupid cat. Of course, the students at Kaibara were all confused when Tohru returned so very different than how she had been before. The Sohmas and Uo and Hana could play it off as amnesia from the accident during what little time they had remaining to graduation. However, Kyo's leaving was a cause for concern and started a big uproar.

Everyone guessed it had something to do with Tohru but couldn't quite figure it out. The rumours ran rampant and the blame for the accident fell on Kyo, who was not there to defend himself. Yuki thought briefly about stepping in to help his cousin but he was far too busy making sure even Kyo's name did not come up around Tohru. Everyone said and believed what they wanted and, eventually, no one cared what they all saw between Kyo and Tohru. Not even his former friends.

"Thank you for meeting with me, Yusuke." Yuki started.

Yusuke nodded and took a drag from his cigarette before replying. "No problem...when was the last time I saw you...your wedding?"

Yuki had to stop himself from rolling his eyes. He did not even want to invite Yusuke to the wedding. He had never really been interested in being Yuki's friend. Yusuke and Hiroshi were always far more content teasing Kyo. But Machi had convinced him that he needed at least a few old classmates there.

"Yes," Yuki replied. "I thought it was time to…catch up over drinks."

"Oh, come on!" Yusuke laughed but he did not sound amused. "You don't need to work your Sohma charm on me…we both know why you're here."

So, he did know something about Tohru's sudden disappearance.

"Well, it seems Tohru…" Yuki started.

"...Interesting." Yusuke cut him off.

Yuki blinked. "Sorry. What is so interesting?"

Yusuke practically sneered his response, "Well, you say her name like you’re friends…when last I checked she was Miss Honda."

Yuki clenched his fist. He knew Yusuke was just trying to annoy him (and it was working). Yusuke knew very well the Sohmas kept tabs on Tohru. How could he not? Although he had acted it in high school Yusuke was not a complete and utter moron. He always knew there was something else going on and he had taken advantage of it.

"When was the last time you saw Miss Honda?" Yuki tried again.

"Wednesday last week," Yusuke answered. "She stopped returning my calls after that."

"Did she say anything?" Yuki continued. "Did you happen to get in a fight?"

"Yeah, we fought." Yusuke waved over the waiter to order another drink. "Then she left."

"Do you…have any idea about where she would have gone?" Yuki had guessed right about why she had left.

Instead of answering Yusuke asked his own question. "Why do you want to find her?"

"I am concerned for her safety." Yuki shot back. "I would think you would be concerned as well."

"Let me guess…" Yusuke laughed "…the Sohma web isn't big enough to find her?"

He was not wrong. For the last day, they had been calling all of their sources and had come up with nothing. From what Yuki knew, Yusuke's family was part owner in a very profitable, very well known tech company and he was grandfathered in just like that. Perhaps they had greater access than the Sohmas to certain databases. Maybe there was a way to track her phone if she turned it back on. Yet, Yusuke seemed to have no interest.

Yuki was somewhat surprised. He had assumed Yusuke would want to help. He was obviously upset she was gone. Otherwise, Yusuke would not be in the state he was. It made Yuki wonder what happened during their fight. He, again, could come up with a few guesses.

"You don't want to find her?" Yuki did not care how hard he pushed his questions or how they might bruise Yusuke's ego.

"Oh, come on!" Yusuke raised his voice knowing what Yuki was trying to imply. "She left and that's that! For once maybe the Sohmas should leave her out of their mess."

Again, he was not wrong. The trouble the Sohmas had caused Tohru was unimaginable. If she was gone, for whatever the reason was, perhaps she should stay gone. If Tohru was beyond the Sohma's reach no one would be able to meddle in her life anymore. Tohru would be as independent as she always hoped to be. Could Akito understand that? Akito was trying her best to be a better head of the family for a very long time now. Which involved taking care of those she had hurt. Although Tohru placed no blame Akito felt as though it was her responsibility to help Tohru after everything.

Admittedly, it hurt Yuki just to think about Tohru really being gone. While she did not remember him, Tohru meant a great deal to Yuki. She was warm and always ready to listen. She was kind. Sometimes to a fault. Yet, Tohru still set an example of the type of person Yuki wanted to be. She had practically raised him into the man he was today. Yuki understood why Kyo did not wish to hear updates but Yuki was happy to hear if Tohru was happy.

Great, Yuki thought to himself, just more things to deliberate. Should Kyo be warned? Should the search be delayed? Should Yuki talk to Shigure? Should Shigure talk to Akito? The list went on. Perhaps there was no right answer to all of Yuki's questions.

"I think…" Yuki began "…the Sohmas would like to stay involved for now."

Even as he spoke Yuki did not know if he believed that himself.

"Look, do what you want…." Yusuke stood to leave. "…and if you do so happen to find my former fiancé at least have her give the god damn ring back."

Chapter Text

As Kyo spoke Tohru could not help but run her right hand over where her engagement ring used to sit. It was a strange sensation having her fingertips feel only skin instead. She had become so used to it after having worn it for well over a year. She could not say the sensation made her feel sad although she thought it was too cruel to Yusuke to say it made her feel liberated. Tohru did not leave because Yusuke was a bad man. In fact, he was one of the kindest she had ever met.

A long time ago, Tohru had come to understand that her role in life was to help others. Not the other way around. She had spent the majority of her life helping others and watching them blossom before her. She did not ask for anything in return. She did not even know how to ask for help in all honestly. Which made life after her accident difficult. Yusuke just happened to notice she was struggling with her recovery and offered her a hand. During the years that followed, Yusuke was a very dear friend to Tohru. Then he made it known he wanted their friendship to be something more.

Tohru was quite surprised the day Yusuke asked her out. He wanted her to be his plus one to a wedding. Uo and Hana were very excited at first. However, once they heard it was the wedding of two of their former classmates, Yuki Sohma and Machi Kuragi, their tune changed a little. While they still wanted her to go on a date with him they suggested something more casual such as going out for soumen.

The soumen noodles were delicious. The man who sat across from her was kind, handsome, and from a well-established family. He insisted on paying for meals and would give her extravagant gifts. He doted on her and always tried to make her smile. Their relationship was encouraged by almost everyone around her.

The only person who opposed it was Tohru's grandfather.

Tohru's grandfather had always been a little confused. More often than not he called her Kyoko instead of Tohru. As he aged it seemed to only get worse. Sometimes at tea, he told strange stories Tohru did not think belonged to her. She could never be sure, however, for she was confused as well after the accident.

She was not even sure how the accident occurred. There was a running joke between Uo, Hana, and herself that Tohru had been chasing after a stray animal. Sometimes it was a rabbit. Sometimes a dog. Other times it was a cat. But no one had any real answers. No one had witnessed it and Tohru suffered from severe amnesia. She could hardly remember her last few years of high school.

As Tohru mumbled on about how she just really needed to leave Tokyo she thought about what her grandfather told her the day she said goodbye to him. She had been sitting on her knees close to his futon with his hand in hers. He had shooed her Aunt and family out of the room so he could speak to Tohru alone.

His hand was spotted with age and wrinkled, but his grip was still strong. Which, for a moment, made Tohru doubt what the doctor had said about her grandfather only having so much time left. But, his chest moved up and down very slowly and groans escaped every now and then as though it was painful to continue breathing.

Through his laboured breathing her grandfather told her:

"The life you leave behind should be one you have made for yourself. Not one that has been made for you. Do not hold the hand of someone that will lead the way. Instead, hold the hand of someone that will walk with you. I do not want to see you miserable, Tohru. Nor would Katsuya and Kyoko. You need to find your peace in this world before being forced to find it in the next."

Most of what her grandfather said made little sense to Tohru in the moment. But, he had planted a seed that Tohru watered over time. Yusuke insisted on paying for meals. But, he also insisted on ordering for her. Tohru would not complain and he did not seem to notice if she did not like the food. He would give her extravagant gifts. But they were items he liked that were meant to show status. Tohru rarely had use for the expensive clothes and handbags and she always felt like a child playing dress-up when she did wear them.

Yet, what was Tohru supposed to do? Her mother and father had left this world. Her best friends were harder to reach. Yusuke was the one constant thing that remained in her life after her grandfather's death. She longed for some sense of normalcy. Yusuke was just that.

On her last birthday, Yusuke gave Tohru another beautiful dress that she was to wear out to dinner. A private car drove Tohru to one of the most exclusive restaurants in the city. Although, she had come to learn nothing was too exclusive for Yusuke's family. Yusuke stood waiting for her. In truth, he always dressed well because of the family business but the suit he was wearing that night was particularly immaculate.

Yusuke complimented Tohru as she stepped out of the car and she thanked him. As she walked into the restaurant she was almost deafened by the large crowd yelling surprise. Tohru was shocked to learn Yusuke had rented out the entire restaurant for her birthday party. Yusuke's family and friends were there. Many of their former classmates had also made an appearance. Although the only real friends Tohru had there were Uo and Hana.

Tohru had shocked Uo had travelled to Tokyo for her birthday. Hana had apparently delayed a business trip as well. Tohru was honoured and humbled by her friend's sacrifices. But, for some reason, it also made her feel uneasy. Uo looked as though she was about to burst. Every once and a while Tohru could hear Hana quietly reminding Uo not to ruin the surprise.

Tohru was not supposed to hear Hana. But, she desperately wanted to know what other surprise there could be. She did not get the chance to ask, however. Tohru barely spoke to her friends all night as Yusuke paraded her around the party. They talked with his parents. Yusuke introduced her to his colleagues and their partners. There were waiters with appetizers but at some point, Tohru wondered when they would actually eat. When she asked Yusuke, he smiled and led her out on to the patio.

The patio was beautiful. Every few meters above them lanterns were illuminating the area. As of that moment, it was cleared to make room for guests. But, Tohru imagined it was a lovely spot to dine as it overlooked the river. Slowly everyone at the party trickled on to the patio as Yusuke said he would like to make a speech. She was sure the speech was lovely. Everyone around her seemed to think so. Tohru, however, could only hear ringing in her ears. She was not entirely sure what was wrong with her? Was she going to pass out?

"Tohru?"

Yusuke had pulled at her hand and she tried to snap out of it. She put her hand on her chest and tried to put on a face to show how touched she was. Tohru smiled at Yusuke and said thank you. She had hoped that was the end of it and they could sit down and eat and she could feel better.

But then Yusuke kneeled and opened up the ring box and said those four words.

The fireworks sounded off in the background and exploded in a kaleidoscope of colour around them. Their friends cheered as Tohru stared in shock at the ring. It was so large she could practically see her reflection in it. She was not entirely sure she liked who she saw. But, how could she embarrass Yusuke so publicly by saying no?

With a tiny nod, Tohru accepted the proposal. When Yusuke slipped the ring onto her finger its weight made her hand drop a few inches. Everyone laughed. But all Tohru could think was that she finally understood what her grandfather meant.

From then on Tohru was Yusuke's fiancé. As the heir to the company, it was quite the news. Tohru never expected to see her face on a tabloid but soon she saw it over and over again. Everyone wanted to know WHO IS TOHRU HONDA? and she prayed her estranged family would stay out of it. According to Yusuke, the press was actually relatively mild. Nothing about her mother or father ever came up. He seemed to know why but never told her the reason.

Besides wanting to know who she was people wanted to know when the wedding would take place...and if it would be a traditional Shinto wedding...and what her kimono would look like if so...and on it went. Yusuke himself actually wanted to know these answers as well. But, every time he brought up the wedding the air between them felt heavy. Like Tohru was choking every time she went to take a breath.

From the beginning, Tohru had been hard to reach. There was a space between her and Yusuke that held Tohru's secrets. All of them showed just how dirty she really was. The longer she and Yusuke were together, the more secrets piled up, and the larger that space became. Tohru was bound by these secrets and vowed to never let them escape her lips. But, the secrets were chasing Tohru and every time she turned around they were only gaining speed.

Yusuke grew more and more frustrated as Tohru dodged every question about their marriage. Eventually, this frustration culminated in the first and only fight they ever had. It was during this fight that Tohru finally let one of her secrets catch up to her. Tohru did not love Yusuke and she could not see a future with him where she could be happy.

The moment she broke off the engagement Tohru acted on instinct. She did not stop moving. Even to give back the ring. She would do that later. If she stopped she feared she might have a moment to think logically. If she had a moment to think logically she might wake up still in Tokyo.

She knew what she was leaving behind. Marrying into a prominent, well-off family meant a safe and stable life. She would never have to decide between paying her bills and paying for food. Yusuke did not even plan on having her work once they were married. Instead, she would take on different philanthropic projects. She would have tea with the wives of his work friends every afternoon. Their children would go to university. Maybe even a Western one. Tohru would be comfortable.

She did not know what she wanted from life, but it certainly was not that.

Tohru had no plan. She went straight home and took only what she needed. She went to the train station and took her very first pause of the night. The screen in front of her flashed the names of different cities and different departure times. Tohru did not care where she ended up so long as the train was leaving next. The next train just so happened to be to Takayama.

As the train sped off, Tohru searched for rentals on her phone. For an hour or so she was able to scroll uninterrupted. Then her phone began ringing and ringing and ringing. Yusuke called over and over again. Tohru declined every single call until she finally turned off her phone.

Tohru's rent had not changed for as long as she had lived in her apartment. At times she thought it was odd when there were increases in rent throughout Tokyo. However, her landlord always said they were comfortable enough and did not need to increase hers. Takayama was far more expensive than she had anticipated.

She did not know what she was going to do. She had no job lined up. Her small savings account would be drained just from first and last month's rent in Takayama. Therefore, it was overnight that she had to come to terms with the fact that she could not return the ring to Yusuke but rather sell it if she wanted to get by.

Tohru did not think the stranger standing in front of her needed to hear all that. Yet, Kyo looked at her quizzically trying to figure out what she meant by really needing to leave Tokyo.

She walked to the entrance of her building and thanked Kyo for walking with her. He gave her a long look, shrugged and went to leave.

In all honestly, Tohru did not know why she did it. But, as Kyo walked away she practically shouted, "I had a fiancé…I ran away!"

Her back was to Kyo when she said it and as she turned around she could not count the different expressions that flashed across his face. For the most part, she wanted to say it was confusion. But, for a brief moment, she thought he looked almost hurt. But then his expression softened and he lifted his hand up to his mouth to hide what Tohru could only think was a smile?

Chapter Text

Kyo watched Tohru as she stood facing him, her hands clenched in tiny fists by her sides and her worry written on her brow. The silence between them was so prolonged he thought she may turn back around and pretend she never said a damn thing. He tried to figure out what to say to her. He must have contemplated every single combination in the alphabet. But, not one seemed to adequately describe how he was feeling. He had a million and one questions he did not dare ask her. 

Who was the guy? When did they meet? How did it fall apart? Why did she run? 

Kyo did lift his hand to his face to hide his smile. But, Kyo’s smile was only a side effect from the laughter he was trying to suppress. In pressing his lips so close together Kyo was sure he could hold it back, but a little huff of air did escape his nostrils nonetheless. The scenario Kyo was imagining in his head could not possibly be accurate, she never said she was a runaway bride. But, all he could see was Tohru waving her arms around frantically at the altar and sprinting away like an absolute lunatic. 

 “I’m so sorry!” Tohru suddenly spoke and she sounded horrified. “That was incredibly rude of me…I don’t know what I was thinking…it’s certainly none of your business…not that you would even want to know…and you just met me yesterday…and…”

"It’s okay!” Kyo finally cut her off. 

Tohru’s eyes fell to the sidewalk and she snapped her mouth shut as if she had just been scorned. She was obviously embarrassed. Which certainly was not Kyo's intention when he stopped her. 

"What I meant," Kyo began, "is that I don't mind that you told me." 

“Really?”

Kyo nodded. “You seem like you needed someone to know.”  

Tohru’s lower lip trembled. Kyo watched as she swallowed hard and tightened her jaw to try to stop herself from breaking down. He knew she probably would not be successful. But, maybe she had gotten better at holding back tears since they last met as teenagers.

“Do you have someone you can talk to?” Kyo asked.

Tohru shook her head.

“Friends?” Where are Uo and Hana?

Tohru shook her head.

“Family?” Where is her grandfather?

Tohru shook her head.

“That must be lonely.” Kyo could have kicked himself but the words Kyoko spoke to him so many years ago rolled off his tongue without even a second thought.  

Just like that, a few tears began to roll down Tohru’s cheeks. She tried to brush them away as quickly as she could. Kyo fought every step as he moved closer to her. He wanted to wrap his arms around Tohru and grip her to his chest. He wanted to stand there for as long as he needed to while she cried. He had to keep reminding himself they were strangers. What comfort could he bring her? But, she also did not have anyone else.

“I’m so sorry.” Tohru cleared her throat a little as she apologized again. “I’m keeping you for no reason.”

Kyo wondered if that was her telling him to leave or her trying to be polite.

“Are you okay?” Kyo asked.

“Yes...” Tohru muttered her response “…just tired.”

But, Kyo could tell that it was far more than just a lack of sleep. Whatever had happened over the years had taken its toll on Tohru. She seemed to lack hope and happiness. Kyo knew that feeling all too well. There had been days where sadness settled so heavily in Kyo like a sudden change in the weather. This sadness brought an aching feeling that spread all over his body that felt like it would never lift.

The chaos he had endured was all Kyo had known. Yet, he continued to live in spite of it all. He had survived it and, to some extent, grown from it. Much of it had to do with Tohru. Maybe he could do the same for her? There was once a time when she could talk to him. He knew her doubts and worries. He knew so many of her secrets. Although, she did not remember speaking them to him. He was not sure how he knew but he was sure she had never uttered them to anyone else. Maybe he was just being conceited.

What Kyo did know is that Tohru had loved him even at his darkest moments. Despite the fact that they were both unaware of it on a conscious level. It would be foolish for Kyo not to admit he still loved Tohru. He just had to look at her once to know that. He missed her voice, he missed her smell. He missed how she used to make him feel. Kyo missed everything about Tohru. He had once asked himself why he had loved her so much. It once terrified him, the things he would do for her so long as she continued to smile.

There was now one thing he knew he had to do.

“I could be someone to talk to if you need me to.”

At some point, Kyo had made up his mind that he could help Tohru through whatever she was feeling. But, that would be a long-term task. He knew he could never be with her in a romantic way ever again. But this lonely girl standing in front of him was so reminiscent of their childhood and he knew she needed a friend.

Kyo could not help but wonder if, perhaps, he and Tohru were tied through en. Or fate as it is sometimes translated. Although he was not always outward with his beliefs, at times it was very apparent Kyo held some. He was after all horrified the day they picnicked at Kyoko’s grave. Because of the Zodiac curse, Kyo thought it hard to deny that karmic bonds existed. However, even without the curse, Kyo probably would have still been superstitious. Though this was something that had not been influenced by Shishou.

Shishou was of the mind that, in many ways, humans are like pieces of clay moulded from the earth. They all leave impressions on one another. Some greater than others. Yes, everyone has a destiny, yet it can be greatly altered and moved in an entirely new direction by even the simplest thing. Shishou had somewhat proven this already.

Many years ago, in what seemed like a different lifetime, Kyo had resigned himself to a life of hatred when he made his bet with Akito. He did not really care if he won or lost, so long as he could have someone to take all this hatred out on. Then came Tohru. Every small act of kindness was like a pebble thrown into a pond that sent out many ripples that changed not only Kyo’s fate but that of all the Zodiac members.

Perhaps fate had drawn Tohru to Takayama. Or perhaps her destiny had been altered by her fiancé and it had nothing to do with Kyo. After all, if there was a bond between them should it not have overcome her repressed memories? Perhaps there was some truth to both. Kyo did not know. In all honestly, Kyo did not care, so long as it meant he could breathe the same air as Tohru for a little while longer.

Chapter Text

Yuki was always used to his phone blowing up. Ayame loved to send the tiniest updates on anything and everything and nothing could be done in a single paragraph. But now Yuki needed a moment's peace. Between his idiot brother, and Akito and Shigure, he could not take the endless buzzing. He had now locked himself in his study with his phone on silent. He had hardly slept the last two days worrying about what was the right thing to do.

He had spent most of the day going over each option. It was easy to overthink in the quiet. Yuki wondered if Tohru really was better off without the Sohmas. He wondered, if he were to continue to look for her without the resources from Yusuke's family, he would even be able to make a dent in the search.

The silence was soon broken by a sudden outburst coming from downstairs. It was Machi. Yuki wondered if he should go down and check on her. Yet, she was never quite so animated unless Manabe was there. And if her idiot half-brother was in the house he would make his grand entrance into the study soon enough.

Yuki braced himself. However, it was not much later that Yuki could hear a few doors slammed and Machi stomping her way up the stairs. There was a gentle knock on the door as if Yuki had not just heard the ruckus.

"Come in" he called and Machi entered to study and did not bother closing the door behind her.

"The cleaning lady just quit," Machi announced as she sat down with a little huff.

"Another one?" Yuki had to hold back a chuckle as he looked up from his book. He could not say he was all that surprised.

Yuki and Machi did not mind the mess all that much. But, apparently, it was somewhat hazardous. The black mould certainly was a cause for concern. So, Yuki had hired a few cleaning ladies. At least four at that point. He had given each one of them very specific instructions: clean the house but do not make it too clean. Every single one was baffled by this and had rarely listened.

So, that was what all the yelling was about.

"I'll set up some interviews for a new one next week." Yuki smiled at his disgruntled wife.

"Okay." Machi crossed her arms but her face softened as she changed the subject. "So, are you going to tell me what's going on?"

Yuki had not gotten the chance to really tell Machi anything. Though she had been sleeping beside him when Akito called. He had all day to fill her in. He was just tired. But she had been very patient for the last few days. Not even questioning when he rolled out of bed at four in the morning to rush to help the head of the family or his mysterious meeting at the restaurant bar. 

"Tohru Honda is missing," Yuki sighed. "And Akito has asked me to look for her.”

Machi, of course, knew everything. She knew Tohru forgot everything and she knew that it tore Yuki apart for a very long time. Despite being free before she became his girlfriend, Yuki had also eventually told her about the curse. Manabe too. Surprisingly, neither of them needed that much convincing. Machi was just glad she never triggered a transformation, while her half-brother was pissed he never got to see one. Frankly, Yuki was glad Manabe only knew after the fact, he would have had far too much fun.

"Have you made any headway then?" Machi looked genuinely concerned.

"No," Yuki replied. "I went to ask Yusuke where she might have gone and he was no help at all…I guess she broke off the engagement."

"Good for her." Machi realized what she said and quickly covered her mouth. However, Yuki could see the corners of her smile peeking out from underneath her fingers. Machi knew hating Yusuke was a team effort and had truly come to regret ever inviting him to the wedding and giving him the idea to ask Tohru out.

"He told me to leave her out of the Sohma mess for once," Yuki said.

"So, that's what you've been thinking about all day?" Machi already knew she was right. "Whether or not you should do it."

Yuki nodded.

"What decision have you made?"

Yuki did not want to admit he was still stuck where he had begun. It felt as though every decision was a double edge sword. Or maybe he was just being selfish. Were they really protecting Tohru all these years?

"I think…" Yuki started "…the main concern is her potentially running into Kyo."

"Would that be so bad?" Machi asked almost immediately.

Would it? It already felt like they had been stuck in a J-Dorama most of high school and no one really knew what would happen if Tohru and Kyo ever crossed paths again. They wondered but made sure never to find out.

Everyone knew Kyo loved Tohru. Maybe they knew long before he did. It was in the way he looked at her. Much of Kyo's life could be explained as an endless night. Cold and dark without even the stars to keep him company. It was evident that Tohru softened Kyo in a way no one else ever could. Not even Kazuma. You could see the storm in him subside when her earthy brown eyes fell on him. Tohru was his sun and he had taken every opportunity to bask in her warmth. He always took notice when she was dimmed and was irritable when she was gone.

Everyone also knew Tohru loved Kyo right back. You could see it when their eyes met, even for the briefest moment. There was always a sparkle in his eyes whenever he saw her that she always returned. There was always something there, something more they were feeling but could not give voice to. Could all the damage be undone if Kyo and Tohru were to meet again all these years later? Yuki thought it was unlikely.

Chapter Text

As Tohru weaved her way through the Miyagawa Morning Market she tried to remain aware of her surroundings. She had a tendency to get distracted. If she got distracted, she would stop looking where she was going, and if she stopped looking where she was going she might run into someone or drop something. The last thing Tohru wanted to do was make a spectacle of herself.

She was looking for Kyo, who had promised to show her around the market his next day off. It had been two whole days since she had last seen him and she had been playing their last meeting over in her head ever since.

When Kyo told Tohru that she could talk to him if she needed to she believed him. It was so overwhelming to hear those words Tohru basically burst into tears. She was unable to even respond to him and just gave a little nod of gratitude. Kyo only let out a gentle laugh as the tears poured down Tohru's face. She frantically tried to wipe them away with her sleeve and even through her sweater she could feel how hot her face was. How mortifying, was all she could think. Yet, Kyo stayed while she dried herself out and chatted with her outside her building. Eventually, she was even able to get a few sentences out between her hiccups.

Their conversation was not all too special but it was reassuring. He asked her if she had seen much of the city since she got there. He offered to show her around some of the places he liked. When he mentioned the market Tohru thought she must have perked up because he told her that was what they would do the first chance they got.

Tohru had to admit that every encounter she had with Kyo so far had been strange. Admittedly, part of that was on her. But it was strange…in a good way…a familiar way. She still could not quite put her finger on why that was but it felt nice to have a friend. She did not want to question things so much they became ruinous.

Finally, Tohru was able to spot Kyo's great mop of orange hair in the thick of the crowd. He was talking to one of the vendors who seemed to be telling a very animated story. Tohru stood and watched them for just a moment. He looked quite comfortable in his surroundings. Which she envied. She had always been the odd one out throughout most of her life. A rice ball in the fruits basket. Of course, she had Hana and Uo, who were misfits just like her. But, sometimes she did wonder what it was like to not feel out of place in a crowd.

At some point, Kyo must have felt her gaze on him because suddenly his eyes were directly on her. He waved her over and Tohru walked quickly. The smell of fish lingered in the open air of the market already but as Tohru got closer to Kyo she could tell exactly which vendor the scent was originating from. She tried not to wrinkle her nose from how strong it was and gave Kyo and little smile as she came up beside him.

"Good morning, Kyo!" Tohru greeted him then turned to the vendor, who's story she realized she had probably interrupted. She bowed so deep that her face was practically in the fish displayed in front of her. "Hello!"

When Tohru rose from her bow, the man on the other side of the booth looked very surprised. His eyes darted from her to Kyo, and back to her. Had she done something wrong?

"Oh, will you stop staring, Hayato!" Kyo spoke gruffly.

"My apologies, it's just when you said you were meeting a friend…" Hayato raised his eyebrow at Kyo "…I didn't think you meant a girl…I don't think I've ever seen you with one!"

"Hayato, this is Tohru." Kyo rolled his eyes at the vendor. "Tohru, this is Hayato."

"It is very nice to meet you!" Tohru bowed again.

"Careful! Or you'll get your hair in my fish!" Hayato warned.

Tohru jumped back from the display in a panic, practically shouting her apologies. As she jumped back she felt her back slam directly into someone walking behind her. Tohru turned to shout another apology. It was then she almost lost her footing on the ground and fell. She probably would have too if Kyo had not grabbed on to her forearm to steady her. Tohru turned to apologize to him too.

Kyo, however, just sighed and dropped her arm. "Come on."

Tohru followed behind him quietly as he cleared a path for her to walk through. She did not mean to dwell on it but Tohru could not help but think about how embarrassed she was. She probably embarrassed Kyo too. You would think she would be less clumsy as an adult. She had tried hard to work on her bad habits.

"You don't want to look at anything?" Kyo asked her.

They had been walking through the market for a while and had not stopped once. Perhaps they had even done a full walkthrough. Tohru had been too distracted to notice. She had made a spectacle of herself after all.

"I'm sorry, you went to all this trouble and all I did was embarrass you!" Tohru lowered her head "And now I'm not even paying attention!"

Kyo laughed. "You thought that embarrassed me?"

Tohru kept her eyes down and nodded.

"I just wanted to get you out of there because you were panicking." Kyo shrugged.

"Oh." was all Tohru could say.

"But…when we go back over there…" Kyo began "…if you do get your hair in the fish I probably get a discount."

A tiny laugh bubbled from Tohru. She was not sure if Kyo knew how easy he had just made things for her at that very moment. Or how much she appreciated it.

"But, first, what do you need?" Kyo asked.

Tohru thought long and hard. Honestly, she needed almost everything. As of that moment she only had tea in her cupboard and eggs in her fridge. But, she was of course, on a budget these days. The basics would have to do.

"Tsukemono…and…rice?" Tohru stated.

Kyo nodded and they went on their way.

Chapter Text

The inside of the dojo was almost unbearable when the seasons began to change. Even in the early morning. It often felt as though one could barely breathe in the thick, humid air that filled the space. Yet, Kyo still moved with precision and passion as the sweat rolled down his brow and into his eyes. It did not matter if his vision was blurred and he could not see the dojo master clearly. Every command called was second nature to Kyo.

When Kyo walked into the dojo that morning he was fully prepared to grovel to regain his place. The dojo master was certainly surprised to see Kyo after his abrupt exit only a few days earlier. However, he was rather forgiving. Kyo had thought about what he was going to say. A family emergency always seemed to do the trick. He did not want to lie though. So, he simply apologized for his behaviour and promised it would not happen again.

"I'll let your lapse in judgment slide this one time," he told Kyo, "but, you'll be cleaning the dojo every day for a month for all the scheduling trouble you caused."

Kyo knew well enough that there was a full cleaning staff that came in after hours. They often worked around him when he trained late into the night. But, he supposed he would the only staff for the next four weeks.

After his morning session, Kyo went on to teach his own classes. News that he quit had already gotten around. Many of his students did not expect to see him back at the dojo. Yet, he doubted anyone would ask him what had happened. He hoped that it would be chalked up to a rumour sooner or later.

The day went by fast. When Kyo was teaching he usually got so caught up in it that he rarely noticed the hands on the clock turning. However, soon enough, the day was done, the dojo emptied, and Kyo was being handed a broom as the master took his leave.

Kyo could confidently say that he took the cleaning staff for granted. The dojo was beyond disgusting after dozens upon dozens of bodies passed through sweating and sometimes drawing blood. He quickly came to the conclusion that it was not a one-person job. It was going to take him ten times longer. Yet, he would have to grin and bear it and get it done.

As Kyo swept and washed he distracted himself by going over his lesson plan for the next day. He kept reminding himself that the inconvenience of having to clean the dojo was minor if it meant he could stay. However, by the time he got the last speck of dirt off the floor and changed he had missed the last bus by a pretty big margin. He could not help but grumble to himself as he locked the dojo up for the night and prepared for his long walk home.

He definitely did not expect Tohru to be waiting for him.

Yet, there she was, standing at the usual stop and glancing up and down the street. When Tohru spotted Kyo she waved her arm and met him about halfway. As she stopped in front of him she smiled. But, she looked a little embarrassed.

"Did you wait for me?" Kyo asked in confusion.

"Well," Tohru began, "I thought if you missed the bus you'd have to walk home alone!"

"And…?" Kyo could not help but chuckle at her. It was not like he was the one who had to worry about being alone at night. She did not remember but had she not once hit him with her book bag because she thought he was a predator?

Tohru's cheeks began to turn pink, "I thought maybe you would want some company!"

"Thanks," Kyo said and Tohru's face lit up.

Tohru was, however, still curious. "May I ask why you missed the bus?"

"I caused some trouble," Kyo gave her a playful half-smile and looked off, "and now I have to clean the dojo by myself for a month."

"What kind of trouble?!" Tohru placed her hand over her mouth in shock.

"It doesn't really matter." Kyo rolled his eyes. "Are we leaving or what?"

They walked for a while in silence until Tohru started chatting about her day. After some time, she started asking Kyo all about the dojo. She was genuinely curious about martial arts. Similar to when they had first met as teenagers. He even had to hold his breath a little when she asked if she could one day see a match between him and his master. He wondered if she ever got the feeling of déjà vu when she spoke to him. He muttered his response. Which was not really a yes or no. Then it was quiet again.

A little while later Tohru piped up, "Do you think you might need some help cleaning?"

"No." Kyo said, "I can accept my punishment for what it is."

"But," Tohru held her fist up to make her point, "I am really good at cleaning!"

Kyo knew she was and was still going to say no again.

However, she then added, very quietly, "And then we could ride the bus together still!"

"Fiiiine" Kyo's reply was drawn out but she could at least tell he was being sarcastic. 

Tohru let out a little squeal. "I promise I'll do a good job!"

Kyo had to stop himself from groaning in response. Not because he did not think she would do a good job. In fact, he had no doubt Tohru would do a good job. It was just exhausting that she was such a good person. With such a good heart.

Tohru had always had a good heart. Which he guessed was the problem. She gave so much of herself to the Sohma family without any expectation of return. In her world, the word "busy", did not exist. She set her priorities aside and made time for those who needed her. She was one of the most caring people he had ever met. But, also, one of the most sensitive. Kyo had used and abused her good heart and she did not even know it. He did not want to be the reason her good heart gave up. Not again. 

Chapter Text

The next day was similar to the one before. Kyo trained in the morning, taught in the afternoon, and was handed a broom at the end of the night. For a brief moment, Kyo had almost expected Tohru to come trotting in only seconds after the dojo master left. But, there was still no sign of her as the sun sank in the sky. Honestly, Kyo should have known better. She was probably lost.

Should he go look for her? He could only imagine Tohru's panicked face as she entered the streets where all the buildings began to look the same. Would she dare ask for directions? Would there be anyone to ask? In the age of technology, he hoped she had a map app on her phone. Kyo could not help but begin to panic himself.

He had eventually settled on going out to find her when there was suddenly a gentle knock coming from the front entrance. It really could not have been anyone else but Tohru. Kyo strode over to let her in. When he slid open the door, he could tell she was flustered, but trying her best to hide it. In her hand, she was gripping a piece of paper tightly. It had the dojo address on it. Which he had given her the night before.

"I found it!" Tohru announced as she entered. "Easy peasy!"

Yeah, right. Kyo was sure she got turned around at least twice, but would never say it to her face.

Tohru took off her shoes and quickly looked around. Her nose crinkled absentmindedly, meaning the smell of sweat was overpowering. Kyo tried not to laugh. He was sure she did not know what to expect. Had she ever had a reason to visit a dojo since?

Tohru came ready to work, that was for sure. Her long hair was tied back without any ribbons and Kyo was sure this was the only time he had ever seen her in trousers. She was eager to know what had been done, what needed to be done, and where to start.

The main training floor was sunken a good three feet. The upper level was where students frequently sat to watch classes or matches, sometimes letting their feet dangle over the edge. Tohru said she did not mind cleaning the pit and went to work. She moved swiftly and efficiently and did not speak for what seemed like a long time.

Kyo knew this was a habit Tohru always unconsciously had. Tohru had always been fine taking care of others, but never herself. She was distracting herself. Because, if she was distracted, she would not be forced to acknowledge or feel the things she had endured.

"How are things?" Kyo asked.

'Heh?" Tohru perked her head up in his direction as he spoke.

"How are things?" Kyo repeated himself. "...with…you know…"

"Oh." Tohru's eyes shot to the ground. "Uhm."

Kyo watched as Tohru tensed up. She was clearly embarrassed he was bringing it up. Maybe she was wondering what had provoked the question.

"I can't really bring myself to turn on my phone." She muttered after some time. "Or log in to any social media."

So, no one knew where Tohru was. Not even Uo and Hana. She was obviously being careful not to leave any sort of traceable footprint. Kyo was sure some sort of manhunt had begun if Akito had any say it in. But, it looked like the Sohmas had not gotten very far. If Kyo was being honest, he did wonder who her ex-fiancé was. He did not know how things ended, but for someone like Tohru, he would have gone to the ends of the earth to fix things.

"Do you think you'll ever go back?" Kyo asked. He knew he had to tiptoe with his questions. There were certain things he was not supposed to know. Someone Tohru just met would not know about her mother or father. He was not even sure she ever told him she was from Tokyo.

"I don't know…" Tohru shook her head. "…the way I left…"

Tohru trailed off. Perhaps she was not ready to tell that part of her story yet. She clearly felt remorse for those she had left behind. That's just who Tohru was.

"I… I guess I'm just a coward." Tohru sighed.

Coward? Kyo thought.

Perhaps Tohru was gentle and kind. She was the type of girl to smile at everyone she passed. Back in school, she used to stare hard at the chalkboard when she did not understand what the teacher was teaching. She was the type of girl who slept like a little kid and wished for nothing but good things for those she loved. However, Kyo would never say she was a coward.

A coward could not survive what Tohru had. A coward would not choose to live in a tent. Or go toe to toe with Akito. A coward would not chase down his true form despite being terrified.

Kyo scoffed, "I think you are a lot braver than you give yourself credit for."

Tohru finally looked up at him, surprised. "Really?"

"Yeah," Kyo replied. "I'm sure you did what you had to do and it took a lot of bravery to do it."

"I think," Tohru began, "I would have regretted it...saying yes was a mistake."

Kyo shrugged, "You're allowed to change your mind and you're allowed to make mistakes."

"It just…" Tohru's voice caught in her throat, "…it just feels like it will hurt forever.”

As Tohru finished her sentence, Kyo hopped down into the pit and walked over to her. He had realized how ridiculous it was to be having this conversation across the room from one another. For a second, he hesitated to touch her, but then he lifted his hand on to her shoulder to reassure her.

"The hurt never goes away entirely." This was something Kyo knew all too well. "But, it gets better over time. One day you will wake up and the weight resting on your shoulders from the last few months, or even years, will feel lighter."

"I hope so," Tohru mumbled.

"I know so," Kyo said. "You just have to keep being brave."

Chapter Text

As Yuki walked through the Sohma Estate he could not help but smile to himself. It did not seem like so long ago he had to sneak his way in. He spent most of his high school years away from the Estate, avoiding the family and the nosy maids who loved to guilt-trip him. To walk around so freely was a blessing. Yet, he wished this visit was under different circumstances.

Yuki had been summoned. Obviously to see how far he had gotten in his search for Tohru. Which, he did not know how to admit to Akito, was dead in the water. A tight knot was forming in Yuki's stomach just thinking about it.

The head of the family was more than aware she had messed up. Much of what Akito had done would leave lasting marks on the former Zodiac members. She was working hard every day to atone and become a better leader. Yet, it was only natural for Yuki to fear that she might snap. The closer Yuki got to Akito's office, the tighter the knot in his stomach became.

Yuki knocked gently on the shoji and waited. However, the voice that called for him to enter did not belong to Akito. Instead, Yuki found Shigure. He was alone, except for a single assistant, who was handing Shigure stacks upon stacks of papers of which he was to sign.

Shigure waved him over and Yuki sat across from him as he shuffled through the papers. Yuki was always in awe when he saw the old dog in action. Shigure had somehow seamlessly transitioned into his new role within the family. Watching over him now, Yuki had to wonder if it had all been an act before.

The lecherous author, lazing around in his kimono no longer seemed to exist. More often than not, Shigure could now be found in a suit with Akito close by. Whatever plan Shigure had all those years ago seemed to fall perfectly into place.

Well, almost.

"Thank you for coming by, Yuki," Shigure peered up, "I'm sorry the workload seems to never end."

Yuki was sure it never did. The Sohmas were a large clan and Akito had been sickly for many years. Those who remained loyal to Akira and doted upon Akito did not keep many things in order outside of the Zodiac. Since they left there was much catching up to do.

Yuki had often been asked to help with catching up. It would have thrilled his parents to see him working within the family. Yet, he was far too busy with his own business to give it a second thought.

"Where is Akito?" Yuki finally asked.

"Oh, right," Shigure began, "She's out."

Yuki could feel himself getting annoyed. "Did she not want to see me?"

"No, that was a lie," Shigure laughed, "I figured you would be quicker to come to Akito than to me."

"And what do you want?" Yuki rolled his eyes, Shigure was not wrong.

"Well," Shigure began, "I want you to find Tohru, but you keep ignoring my messages."

It was true, Yuki had kept his phone on silent since he had locked himself in the office. He had tried not to dwell on all the questions and concerns coursing through his mind. Instead, he spent time with Machi and attempted to cook dinner. But, at bedtime, his wife asked him again, what he was going to do. To Yuki's amazement, he had unknowingly already made the decision.

"I am done looking for Tohru," Yuki said flatly.

Shigure could not mask the look of shock on his face. "Excuse me?"

"I am done looking for Tohru," Yuki repeated himself. "You can keep looking, but I would advise against it."

"And why is that?" Shigure asked.

"Because we've done enough already," Yuki replied.

"And what about her memories?" Shigure argued. "What about Kyo?"

Shigure knew well enough the actual chances of Tohru ending up in Takayama. He was trying to manipulate Yuki so he would not have to face Akito. Which, in all honestly, Yuki did not blame him. He just wished the bastard would show more compassion for Tohru.

"We need to let her life unfold on its own," Yuki explained. "We cannot always dictate what happens to her."

"Akito…"

"…Is going to have to get over it."

Shigure sat and stared at Yuki. It was much easier to say this to him than Akito herself. Akito meant well when it came to Tohru. Yet, like Yuki, maybe she was blinded by her adoration for Tohru. Yuki was sure he could not convince Akito to let Tohru go on his own. Shigure was the only one she could be persuaded by.

Shigure knew this as well.

"And…" Shigure said, "…what do I get from you if Akito…gets over it?"

"What you want me to start calling you Sensei too?"

Shigure gave Yuki a sinister smile. "Not exactly."

Chapter Text

For the next week, Tohru helped Kyo at the dojo as much as she could. They did not see each other every day. Sometimes her odd cleaning shifts got in the way. But, she was happy when she could see him. She liked spending time with Kyo. Which was part of the reason why she offered to help him clean the dojo in the first place. It was nice to have a friend.

Tohru learned that Kyo always went to the Miyagawa Morning Market on his day off. Although she did not have money to spare, she still liked to tag along with him as he bought the ingredients for his meals for that week. That morning, Kyo had offered to treat Tohru to lunch. Which she readily agreed to.

She was pleased when they entered the restaurant and saw how quaint it was, with small wooden kotatsu and simple art on the walls. It was far different from where she was used to dining over the last few years. Which was a good thing.

"Now this place may not look special," Kyo began as they walked in, "but they make the best Udon in Japan."

Tohru smiled as they sat down. Kyo did not seem to be a hyperbolic person. If he said the Udon was the best in Japan she was sure it was true. Soon, the server came and took their order and Tohru and Kyo chatted idly as they waited for their food to arrive.

"Do you work tonight?" Kyo asked.

"Yes!" Tohru grinned.

She was excited whenever she got to work and bring in her own money. She had done such a good job one of the companies hired her part time. While Tohru would have preferred full time she had to take what she could get. Rent would be due soon and, by her calculations, she still should have enough money to cover it. Perhaps, if there was some money left over, she could pay Kyo back for lunch someday soon.

Kyo laughed at her enthusiasm. "You sure like cleaning, huh?"

Tohru nodded.

"Why?"

"What do you mean?" Tohru blinked.

Kyo cocked his head, "I mean there has to be a reason you like it so much."

It was strange. Tohru could swear Kyo saw right through her. One moment Kyo was there, keeping her mind off the things she did not want to face. Then the next, he was pushing her to confront them head-on.

Tohru knew why she liked cleaning so much. She liked how it distracted her and the feeling of a job well done. But, there was another reason as well.

"I guess…it gives me some semblances of control," Tohru admitted.

"What happened?" Kyo asked. "Why do you feel out of control?"

Tohru thought carefully about the question. If she was being honest, she knew when everything began to fall apart. When she saw the first cracks in her façade. It was the night before graduation. It was three in the morning, but she could not sleep. Half because she was excited and half because she felt sick with worry.

She had wandered into the bathroom of her old apartment at some point. When she came across her reflection, Tohru could not help but think she did not feel like herself. She really could not remember much about herself before her accident. But she was sure she was different once upon a time. Now, she just felt like a watered-down version of whoever she was before. Which scared her. Tohru tried to walk away from the girl staring back at her, but as she backed up, all she felt was the cold tile wall against her back.

That was the moment she gave in.

Tohru slid down the wall and fell to the floor in defeat. She buried her head in her knees and she could feel the tears spilling from her eyes. She was sure she was making some sort of wailing noise, but she could not hear it. The only thing she was aware of was the aching in her chest.

So many things were about to change. Hana would be busy with her new job. Uo would be moving to the countryside with her mysterious boyfriend. Tohru was fulfilling her mother's dream. But what was to come next for her?

She still did not know.

"I think I have been lost ever since…" Tohru paused a moment, wondering how Kyo would react to what she was about to say "…ever since my mom died."

Tohru flicked her gaze toward Kyo. His face was almost emotionless. Which she thought was a little odd. Perhaps he did not deal with death well? She wondered if she should continue.

Tohru instinctively opened her mouth to apologize.

"Don't," Kyo rolled his eyes, "say you're sorry."

She was going to say sorry anyway before their food was set down in front of them. They thanked the server and went silent. But, it was not an awkward silence. It was the kind of silence that exists because the food is far too good to focus on anything else. Kyo was correct. It was the best Udon Tohru had ever had.

After a while, Kyo spoke again. "What was your mom like?"

"My mom was the best!" Tohru replied. "She was my best friend!"

That was true. Every moment with her mom was special. Every memory with her was golden. Well, almost every memory. However, Tohru would not speak about the bad ones. If she spoke about the bad memories, they might sully the golden ones.

"I just…" Tohru sighed "…did not think she would be gone so soon."

A parent should never have to bury their child. But it was just as painful for a child to have to bury their parent. Particularly at the time her mom died. Sixteen years was simply not enough. There were still so many things she needed from her mom.

Tohru tried to be ever the optimist and not become a burden to those around her. Yet, she desperately needed direction and the only person to ever offer her any was her grandfather.

She seemed to make a million and one mistakes without Kyoko.

"I'm sorry about your mom," Kyo said softly.

Tohru could once more feel the tears welling up in her. But, if she cried into her Udon then and there Kyo would probably think she was the biggest baby in the world. Instead, she took a deep breath and smiled once again.

"Would you like to see her?" Tohru asked, already digging in her bag for her pocketbook.

"Sure," Kyo replied.

As Tohru turned back around she opened her pocketbook to show him her favourite photo of her mother. Completely unaware Kyo had seen the photo before. She also did not notice the scowl he quickly erased from his face as she looked back up at him.

Chapter Text

From a very young age, Kyo had come to learn that there was no greater grief than to be left on this earth when another is gone. As a child, he wailed and sobbed when it came to that grief. As a teenager, he still made a scene. But, now as an adult, his grief was discreet but persistent. Similar to how Tohru's grief had always been.

Looking at Tohru, most people did not realize at times she was carrying the weight of the world instead of daydreaming.

Kyo knew he had to be careful when it came to Kyoko. When Tohru spoke about her mom Kyo tried to remain calm and collected. Perhaps to the point of coming off indifferent.

He did not want Tohru to think she could not talk about her mom. However, it put him on edge wondering if one sentence would jog Tohru's memory. Every word he spoke was deliberate.

Of course, Kyo knew that Kyoko would come up eventually. She was the most important person in Tohru's life. But, hearing Tohru admit how lost she still felt after all these years since her mom died felt like a knife twisting in his already open wound.

Tohru did catch Kyo off guard by offering to show him a photo of Kyoko. He had not seen the photo in many years. Yet, similar to her daughter, the memory of Kyoko Honda haunted him. He tried his best to act as though he had never seen the photo before. Or met face to face with the woman as a child.

Tohru folded her pocketbook and placed it back in her bag once Kyo was done looking at the photo. They quietly went back to their meal. Yet, Kyo could tell Tohru was thinking something through.

"What?" Kyo asked her. Tohru blinked as though it had not been obvious she was lost in her thoughts. He waited for her to collect them.

"I was just thinking of something my grandpa said to me before he died," She finally mumbled.

Again, Kyo tried to remain calm and collected. Even her grandfather was now gone. The one person from the Honda family who had always been in her corner.

"I think he might be the reason I ran," she continued.

"What do you mean?"

"Well, what he said gave me the feeling that I might be letting my mom down," Tohru sighed "and I could not bear to do that."

I…won't…forgive…you.

The memory flashed across Kyo's mind instantly. There was a time where Tohru would have gone against her mother. Though, she did not need to know that.

"Do you feel better?" Kyo asked, "Since coming to Takayama?"

Tohru nodded.

"Then, I think any parent would be proud of how you are handling yourself now," Kyo began, "it sounds like you've fought a lot of battles by yourself."

"Thank you, Kyo," Tohru gave him a half-smile, "you always seem to know what to say."

Of course, he knew what to say. He knew Tohru like the back of his hand. He had an advantage.

Tohru glanced down to Kyo's watch. It was getting later in the afternoon. She would have to go and get ready for work soon. And, despite it being Kyo's day off, he still had to clean the dojo later that night.

Kyo paid for their food before they got up and left. They hovered outside the restaurant for a moment as Tohru got her bearings. He was sure she had no idea which direction she was supposed to go.

"Want me to walk you home?" Kyo offered.

"Oh, no," Tohru objected, "you've already been kind enough to get me lunch, I could not continue to impose on you."

"We're only a few blocks away."

"I…I know that."

He gave her a knowing look. She definitely did not.

"Come on," Kyo jerked his head in the direction of her building. He tried not to laugh at the look of surprise on her face. She would have gone the other way.

"Kyo," Tohru said as they went along, "may I ask you a question?"

"Sure," Kyo replied, "I guess."

"Does your family live in Takayama?"

"No," Kyo said, bluntly. He would not dare say his family name or where they lived.

Tohru seemed confused, "Are you not close with them?"

"Not really," Kyo said, "I haven't been home in years."

"Oh…" Tohru's brow dipped in concern "…don't you get lonely?"

Kyo shrugged, "I'm not really attached to anyone but my father."

"What about your mother?"

"She…" Kyo swallowed hard, "…she's not around."

Perhaps Tohru could tell he was not comfortable with the topic because that was the end of that conversation. She did not apologize but she quickly changed the subject and continued on it until they reached her destination.

"Thank you, again, Kyo," Tohru smiled as she moved to wrap her arms around him.

Once again, Kyo was caught off guard. He hesitated for a moment. Incredibly confused. Yet, Tohru had always been an affectionate person. It was the curse that forced them to show affection in different ways.

Kyo tried not to sigh as he returned her embrace. At first, he was worried he would hold her too tight. But holding her was like an effortless intake of breath. Her skin was warm against his. He could feel her heart beating. He never wanted to let go. However, he forced himself not to hold the hug too long.

Friends did not hug for too long.

"I'll see you soon?" Tohru asked, unphased. Of course, she did not understand the significance of the moment.

"Yeah, I guess so," Kyo tried to act as nonchalant as possible.

"It would be a lot easier to meet up if I turned my phone on…wouldn't it." Tohru was not really asking a question.

"Probably," Kyo answered anyway.

Although, he was one to talk. Kyo barely knew how to use his own cellphone aside from texting, phone calls, and navigation. But, she probably wouldn't get lost as much if her phone was on.

"You're right," Tohru agreed.

"Are you sure?" Kyo was not entirely convinced he was. He could only imagine the pile-up of messages she had received.

"Yes," Tohru seemed to have fully convinced herself, "I'll have to face Yusuke eventually."

Chapter Text

Shigure was trying to annoy Yuki into continuing the search for Tohru. He was sure of it. The deal was that Yuki would help with the paperwork and Shigure would talk to Akito. Yet, Yuki seemed to be receiving boxes upon boxes of paperwork and no order to cease the search. He was confident Akito would contact him and go on all about it if Shigure had actually spoken to her.

It was almost comical watching the attendants arrive at his home every day with new boxes and march one by one upstairs. At this point, Yuki’s office looked like a storage facility for the family records. Some of them dated back to before Yuki was even born. He had to wonder if he was being given all this if Shigure was doing anything at all. 

If Shigure was trying to annoy Yuki, it was working. He was incredibly annoyed. But, he would not let Shigure get the best of him. If the dog wants to play a game of chicken he is going to lose, Yuki thought to himself as he began sorting through the boxes.

“Yuki,” Machi called suddenly, “there’s another car out front!”

“Another one?” Yuki grumbled. How much more could there possibly be? Just as Yuki made it downstairs there was a loud BANG, BANG, BANG on the front door.

“Alright, alright!” Machi stalked over to the door with Yuki close behind her.

To their surprise, it was Haru who was standing there holding a singular box of, of course, more paperwork. He must have used his feet to knock on the door. Honestly, Yuki was surprised he had not broken the thing down like that.

“Haru?!” Yuki said, surprised.

“Hey.”

Haru nodded at Yuki and handed Machi the box while he slipped off his shoes. For a moment, Machi must have been under the impression that Haru would take it back from her. However, he pranced right passed her to envelope Yuki in a hug. Machi groaned and set it down by the front door.

“Now, now Machi don’t be jealous.” Haru released Yuki but still kept one arm draped over him. “I know Yuki said I was his first love but you are his last.”

“When have I ever said that?” Yuki sighed. Sometimes Haru was just as bad as his brother.

“I wonder…” Haru looked off into the distance as if he was trying to remember the false memory he had just created.

“I’m assuming you’re here for a reason?” Yuki finally asked.

“Yes,” Haru walked back over and picked up the box Machi had set down, “Sensei said you were doing paperwork for the family, so I offered to bring the last one over.”

“Oh,” Yuki blinked, “thank you, Haru.”

“Just upstairs there?” Haru was already making his way to Yuki’s office before getting an answer.

Yuki gave Machi a playful look before following Haru. Once they were in the office Haru set the box among the sea of paperwork already present. He took a long time to look at all the boxes, almost as if he was hovering

“Haru…” Yuki began "...is there another reason you’re here?”

“I just wanted to see how you were doing, with Tohru missing and all,” Haru shrugged.

Yuki grinned, “I’m doing okay.”

“Hmm,” Haru nodded.

“How’s Rin?” Yuki asked.

“She’s okay,” Haru replied.

Okay was probably the best-case scenario for Rin. The former horse did not quite understand Tohru’s choice the way the rest of the Zodiac did. Similar to Yuki, Rin sought a mother in Tohru. When Tohru chose to forget her time with the Sohmas, Rin felt as though she had been abandoned all over again. It was a hard recovery. One Haru had to see her through.

“Good I’m glad,” Yuki said

“So, you’re doing all this for Tohru?” Haru jerked his head toward the stack of boxes.

“Yes,” Yuki nodded, “and Shigure is supposed to convince Akito to call off the dogs.”

“Hmm,” Haru repeated.

Yuki knew Haru had gotten almost everything he wanted. “I’m really sorry, Haru, but I really should get going on all this.”

“Oh, no problem.”

Yuki could not help but continue to smile as they made their way back downstairs. Haru would never change. He always cared so much about others. He just wanted to see if Yuki was okay.  

“So, you’re really going to stop looking for Tohru?” Haru asked. “Even if Akito gets mad?”

“Yes,” Yuki swore would hold his ground. Even more so now that Shigure was being a bastard.   

“Good for you,” Haru gave Yuki a gentle smile.

“Bye, Machi!” Haru called as he slipped his shoes back on.

“Bye, Haru!” she called back from somewhere in the house.

Haru turned one last time to Yuki, “Are you going to tell Kyo that Tohru’s gone?”

“Maybe…” that was the one thing Yuki had yet to decide on “probably…eventually.”

"I wonder if that Yusuke guy knew he was fighting a losing battle for Tohru," Haru said as he made his exit.

Yuki would say he probably knew. Almost everyone knew to some extent that there was no competition. Even if Tohru had loved Yusuke with all the power of her soul for her whole life, it would still have not compared to how much she loved Kyo in a single day. Even if she did not know. Perhaps Yusuke was just willing to settle.

Yuki made his way once more up to his office. Although his phone was still on silent, it was facing upright on his desk and he could see someone was trying to call him. He peered over to see the name, to determine whether or not he would answer.

Speak of the devil…

"Yes?" Yuki answered.

"Yuki?"

"Yes."

"It's Yusuke"

"I know," Yuki tried no to sound as irritated as he was, "I have caller ID"

"Right..." Yusuke trailed off.

There was a long silence

Yuki sighed, "How can I help you?"

"Are you still looking for Tohru?" Yusuke asked.

"Well actually..." Yuki was about to start telling Yusuke he had taken his advice.

However, before Yuki could finish, Yusuke cut him off "…Because she turned her phone back on."

Chapter Text

Tohru thought she had all the courage of her convictions a few nights ago. She sat in her living room, late into the night, several nights in a row, staring at her black phone screen. All she had to do was press one button. It was a simple action. Yet, she could not bring herself to do it.

She strived to be a kind soul in a world that had not been so kind to her. Tohru had experienced a plethora of pain at the hands of others but still wanted to love deeply. She refused to harden because she never wanted someone else to feel the same hurt she had by her hand. Which was why it was so hard to face her former fiancé.

Tohru knew she had not been fair to Yusuke.

She felt pressured…trapped…like there was no way out. She felt alone. But, how did Yusuke feel? Tohru thought about the way she left. Did he feel alone now that she was gone? Did he wonder why he was not good enough for her to stay?

Yusuke could have given Tohru everything a person could ask for. But, if she got it, she knew she would never be happy again. She went to work and faced people that disliked her on a daily basis. She went to sophisticated parties, with sophisticated people and felt like a fraud.

She needed to be perfect at her job. Tohru could not slip but because she needed to provide for herself. She needed to be perfect for Yusuke. His family had an image to protect.

It was like Tohru was running and endless race. At this point in time being tired was part of who she was. She could not remember the last time she felt awake. Perhaps Tohru had reached rock bottom. She felt as though her world would begin collapsing beneath her feet if she finally read the messages and listened to the voicemails. The thought of it set a heaviness in her chest and resulted in a shortness of breath she could not ignore.

Yet, if Tohru had reached rock bottom, she knew she could get back up again.

I can do this, Tohru thought, and even if she could not, she had to. How could she ever face Kyo again if she did not? She told him she would contact him the next day when her phone was on. She had convinced herself and he had supported her. Then she went and chickened out. Perhaps he would still be proud even if she took her time.

Tohru finally snatched the phone from the table and pressed down on the power button. As the screen lit up a little yelp escaped her mouth. Before Tohru even realized what she was doing, she had tossed her phone across the room. Of course, that did not stop it from sounding off every notification bell possible. Texts, voicemails, emails…they had all piled up…and were waiting for her.

The string of notification seemed never-ending. All Tohru could do was sit, wide-eyed, and listen as they went on. She did not even realize she was holding her breath until the room became silent and she let out a sigh of relief.

When Tohru finally found the strength, she slowly went to retrieve her phone. She was shaking as she picked it up off the carpet. How could one tiny object hold so much weight? Tohru tried not to cry as she unlocked her phone, but her eyes were already stinging as she went to open her messages. Names lit up across her screen…Uo…Hana…and, of course, Yusuke.

I'm sorry.

Can we talk?

Answer your phone.

Tohru, are you safe?

Where are you?

I need to know you're okay.

Come home.

Please.

The more Tohru read, the more intense the stinging in her eyes became.

All the messages were the same. Everyone wanted to know where she was and wanted her to come home. When she listened to the voicemails, the sound of pleading in her friend's voices made her heart hurt. She knew she needed to talk to Uo and Hana and explain herself. She had never heard them so confused.

By the time Tohru reached her last voicemail, she was a nervous wreck. It was from Yusuke from three or four days ago, if she had her dates right. She wondered what more he could possibly say. He had repeated himself ten times over. Tohru was not sure she could handle an eleventh.

Yet, once again, his voice filled her ears.

"Hey…I know you might not get this…I know your mailbox is getting full…maybe you ditched your phone…you never were good with technology anyway," Tohru found herself letting out a little laugh at the same time he did. "I just want you to know…I think I get it, Tohru. But, even if I don't, we both have to live with the choice you made. I just hope you're safe and sound and happier…"

The voicemail cut off after that. Finally, Tohru could feel the tears running down her face. Was Yusuke telling her it was okay? Was he letting her go? After all the trouble she had caused, he was only thinking of her happiness now. He really had always been so kind to her.

Did that mean she could stay in Takayama? Without a dark cloud of guilt hanging over her head? Did that mean she could stay with…

Tohru reached for a piece of paper she had been keeping on her counter. She punched the numbers into the dial pad of her phone and waited as it began to ring. She knew it was late. But, there was only one person Tohru could think of sharing the news with.

Chapter Text

Kyo knew Tohru had not ended up turning her phone back on because he had not heard from her for two days straight. Which was fine by him. In all honesty, he did not know if he wanted to see her yet. If the rat bastard could see Kyo now, Yuki would tell him to quit pouting like a child. But he was not there and Kyo would carry on as he pleased. He just felt so blindsided.

He was also angry. Angry with Tohru. Angry with himself because he had no right to be angry with her. She did not know any better. She did not know that Yusuke was once Kyo’s friend. Perhaps Kyo was jealous that Yusuke got to spend the years with Tohru that he never got to. It was not fair. But, then again, life had never been fair to Kyo and he could not make up for lost time. Or lost memories.

For several nights, Kyo had been restless, going over questions in his mind he would never dare to ask Tohru about her relationship with Yusuke. How had he shaped her world? Why was she so sad? Had he hurt her?

The more Kyo dwelled on these questions, the more he wanted to kick Yusuke’s ass.

Kyo really was acting childish. He had not behaved this way since he was a teenager, young and unable to control his temper. Yet, there was one thing he could not do as a teenager to find sleep and forget the world for a little while.

Kyo poured himself a drink. Then another one. Then another one. It did take a few more drinks than he would care to admit but, eventually, he was able to close his eyes for a few hours.

It was not until three shrill rings filled his apartment that Kyo was stirred from his sleep. He groaned and rolled over onto the empty side of the bed. He ran his hand around blindly until he stumbled upon his phone.

“Hello?” Kyo said groggily, still more than half asleep.

“Kyo?” he shot straight up as Tohru’s voice came through.

Now he was awake.

“Kyo?”

He had been quiet for too long. She probably thought the line had dropped. He was just so shocked and he did not know what to say. Why was she calling so late at night? Or rather, so early in the morning? Kyo thought as he peered over at the clock on his nightstand.

“Yeah?” he finally answered.

“It’s…it’s Tohru…” she began “…I’m so sorry for calling so out of blue…I know I probably woke you up…I just…”

“Are you okay?” Kyo interrupted her.

He wanted to give Tohru a moment to catch her breath. She was stuttering through every word and sounded as though she had just been crying. Although, he did not know if they were happy or sad tears. Perhaps, she was calling Kyo to let him know that she had made up with her fiancé and was going home to Tokyo to marry him.

Tohru took a deep intake of air before answering, “Yes…that is…”

Kyo braced himself but Tohru did not finish her sentence. In fact, she was quiet for a very long time. Yet, she did not hang up. Maybe, she did not know if she was okay or not. All he could do was sit silently and wait for her thoughts to form.

“…I think I could use a friend right now…” Tohru said, “…if you don’t mind.”

Kyo could not be sure, but it sounded almost as though a bit of laughter had bubbled up at the end. He briefly wondered if Tohru was going a little insane and needed a distraction. He looked out his window. The streets were still covered in darkness. However, they would not be for long.

“Meet me outside your building in ten,” Kyo said.

“What?” Tohru asked in confusion.

“Meet me outside your building in ten” he repeated then hung up.

As instructed, Tohru was standing outside her building when Kyo arrived. It was windier than he had anticipated. Tohru kept having to flatten the hem of her skirt with each gust. Yet, it was far too humid to be cold. He was thankful for that.

“Come on,” Kyo did not even stop to greet her properly.  

“Where are we going?” Tohru asked, already on his heels.

“You’ll see,” Kyo replied.

“Kyo!”

He turned to face Tohru. She looked weary and had definitely been crying. Her eyes were bloodshot and her cheeks were rosy. He gave her a crooked smile. He did not have time to explain. They needed to get going if they were going to make it in time and he had already taken her clumsiness into account.

“Trust me,” he said and gently took her hand, “over here.”

He had found the spot shortly after arriving in Takayama years ago. Before he had fully come to terms with how things had played out, Kyo could barely sleep. He took to wandering the streets late at night to take his mind off things. It did not take him long to come across a route quite unusual to the well-paved sidewalks. The path was not worn or trodden down. It was bumpy and lined with loose rocks and became quite steep as it went on. 

He hoped Tohru was looking where she was going. Kyo kept telling her to watch her step. Every once in a while, he would feel a tug on his hand, which could only mean she had tripped up. But, they still made it to the top in one piece.

The cityscape was in the distance with small lights from the windows of early risers scattered like stars. The alps were just a little further off. They had indeed made it just in time. Kyo gestured for her to sit down. Kyo crossed his legs and Tohru sat on her knees. Once they had made themselves comfortable he pointed to where she would need to concentrate to see it.

Tohru was still slightly bewildered. Nonetheless, she kept her gaze steady. Kyo fiddled with the grass by his feet and pretended not to glance her way while waiting for her reaction. He could not help but smirk when her face lit up as the sun began to creep over the horizon. 

For a brief moment, they were in between night and day. Then the soft glowing rays began to transform the sky. At first, it looked as though the sky was on fire. Yet, the longer they sat, the more it stretched out into a rich blue. They stayed in perfect silence, for what seemed like a very long time, admiring the sunrise. It was honestly probably the last good one the city would see for a while. The rainy season was about to begin.

After a while, Kyo glanced back over to Tohru. She was now leaning back, her hands rested on the grass behind her, holding herself up. Her eyes were closed and her lips were curved in a slight smile. Her reaction was quite reminiscent of the first time he had seen the sunrise in Takayama. It felt as though it was an invitation to a new day. Or, in his case, a new life.

As Kyo looked over Tohru, he also could not help but think about how beautiful she was. Her long brown hair was blowing in the wind and her face was illuminated by the new light. It was the first time he had seen her at peace in what seemed like a lifetime. He wondered what she was thinking about. He wondered if he should ask her about Yusuke. Yet, for some reason, he had come to the conclusion that Tohru had not made up with her fiancé and was not going home to Tokyo to marry him.

Suddenly Tohru opened her eyes and turned her head toward him, “What?”

Kyo could feel his face heating up. He was at a loss for words. She had caught him staring. Friends were not just supposed to stare at each other like he was staring at her. He blinked quickly, trying to think of some excuse.

“Uh…there’s a bug in your hair, just there…”

Tohru’s eyes widened as she wildly shook her head to rid of the imaginary bug.

“Is it gone?” Tohru asked.

“Yes,” Kyo replied. The impulse to reach out for her overcame him as the wind now whipped hair in front of her face. She laughed as he tucked the wild strands behind her ear. “You’re good now.”

Chapter Text

Yuki sat quietly as the town car drove slowly through the Sohma estate. He could not help but peer out the blackened window at those they passed by. The Sohmas were a large clan and, admittedly, Yuki did not even know half the members. Therefore, he would often make up stories in his mind about who those they passed were and where they were going. It was a habit he had possessed since he was a child. It was a mindless distraction, but a necessary one.

It had been days since Yusuke contacted him and, in that time, Yuki had come to the brink of insanity.

It had taken a moment for Yuki to figure out what exactly Yusuke was trying to say. Yuki thought Yusuke had made himself very clear the night they met for drinks: he had no interest in finding Tohru. Had he had a sudden change of heart?

According to Yusuke, he knew Tohru had turned her phone back on because she had never learned to turn off her location sharing setting. He had gotten the notification just moments before his call. In all honesty, Yuki had to stop himself from laughing. Of course, technologically illiterate Tohru had given herself away. Yet, that did not mean he was any less confused.

Yuki had not intended to be so blunt, but he immediately informed Yusuke that the Sohmas were no longer looking for her. Yuki had assumed Yusuke would be frustrated. However, Yuki had not anticipated Yusuke cursing him out for the Sohmas choosing now to cease being a pain in his ass.

Yuki was quick to rebut and asked why Yusuke did not just go get Miss Honda himself since he already knew where she was. Apparently, she had made it clear she was done with him when she left. Yet, Yusuke still wanted to know she was okay.

In the end, Yusuke told Yuki he could do what he wanted with the information of her whereabouts.

Tohru is in Takayama.

Tohru is in Takayama.

Tohru is in Takayama.

That was the only thing running through Yuki's mind. Of all the places in all of Japan…in all the world…Tohru was in Takayama. Potentially, with Kyo. Yuki tried to think about what Machi had said about how them being together again might not be such a bad thing. But, that had been a hypothetical conversation. Now…

"Sorry," Yuki said as he finally tore his attention away from the sidewalks, "we can stop just here."

"We are not going to the main estate?" the driver asked.

"No," Yuki replied, "not today.”

The car stopped, Yuki got out, and thanked the driver before telling him to come back around in an hour or so. As the driver took his leave, Yuki stared at the entrance and the house just beyond it. He did not know why he was nervous. He had taken lessons at the family dojo when he was younger. But, he had never been to Kazuma Sohma’s home.

Kazuma himself was surprised when he opened the front door to find Yuki. Yet, he still welcomed Yuki in. Yuki could not help but carefully take in his surroundings as Kazuma led him to the parlour. The house was clean, but not sterile, the air was warm, and a faint scent that Yuki could not quite place lingered in the air. So…this was where Kyo grew up?

"Please," Kazuma gestured to a tatami mat, "have a seat."

For what seemed like the first time in a very long time, Yuki took the formal position of seiza on the mat. He had no idea what made him do such a thing. Perhaps, it was the strange air of authority the martial arts master possessed.

"Now, what do I owe the pleasure of seeing you?" Kazuma asked.

Yuki opened his mouth but, suddenly, out of his periphery, he spotted a woman hovering on her knees near him. Yuki turned his attention to her and blinked. Until he saw her kimono he was unsure of what she was even doing there.

"Sorry," she said, "I did not mean to interrupt."

"It's okay, Mio-Kun," Kazuma replied, "If you are wondering if we would like tea, we would, please."

Mio nodded, then bowed, and made her way out of the room.

Yuki blinked again, "You have a maid?"

Kazuma laughed, "Apparently, you can only almost burn down the house so many times before the family sends help."

It was odd, yet perhaps it was good Kazuma had someone around the house, Yuki thought. Kyo had certainly worried about Kazuma getting lonely. Whether it was when he was facing his imminent confinement or when he had to move across the island after he was finally free. Rin no longer required Kazuma's watchful eyes and, much to Kyo's relief, Hana's high school crush never flourished into anything more.

With a gentle knock on the fusuma, Mio re-entered the parlour. She was balancing a very large pot of tea and two cups on a rather small tray. With what seemed like a great amount of haste, she set the tray down between Yuki and Kazuma before finding a spot to rest on her knees in the corner of the room. Yuki chalked it up to her not wanting to spill scalding water on herself or them.

"Thank you, Mio-Kun." Kazuma then turned his attention back to Yuki. "Where were we?"

"Well…" Yuki began "…I decided that, within the family, you may be the only person to have a reasonable response to my predicament."

"Your Tohru predicament?" Kazuma asked.

"And…my potential Kyo predicament…" Yuki sighed.

"What do you mean?"

Yuki did not know if it was a good or bad sign that Kyo had not contacted his father.

Yuki took a deep breath and just blurted it out, "Tohru is in Takayama."

Kazuma sat for a moment, stunned. "Takayama…of all places…"

All Yuki could do was nod. But, it was somewhat of a relief to Yuki. All his initial concerns were now crossing someone else's face.

"It's interesting…isn't it?" Yuki asked.

"Is it?" Kazuma replied.

"What would you call it?"

"I think it's strange…isn't it? Kyo and Tohru have not spoken or seen each other in years," Kazuma began, "yet, after all this time and distance between them, they are now in the same place."

"Do you think it was something beyond our control?" Yuki offered.

"Like what…fate?" Kazuma laughed.

Yuki could feel himself getting annoyed with Kazuma, he never knew the dojo master to be so dismissive. "So, what would you do if they are together…in any sense of the word?"

"Well, she forgot us, the Sohmas, and Kyo for a reason."

"If they are now together maybe it is for the best," Yuki did not realize he had begun to raise his voice, "maybe that's how love works."

"Meaning?" Kazuma stared quizzically at Yuki.

"The feeling does not disappear just because the person does…"

Kazuma gave him a gentle smile, "I think you've come up with a reasonable response to your predicament all on your own, Yuki."

Chapter Text

Kyo and Tohru's time together continued to pass by. Like Kyo, Tohru soon became a regular at the Miyagawa Morning Market almost every Monday. As the rainy season began, they could be spotted under the same umbrella. Kyo would often carry the handle in one hand and their purchases in the other while Tohru browsed. Sometimes, Tohru would turn around in excitement to call after him, as if he was not directly behind her, and they would brush arms or bump into one another. Yet, it was not awkward. They usually paid no mind and just went on admiring whatever she had found.

Everyone knew they were not together. At least not in that way. But that did not stop them. The vendors, whose names Tohru had all come to know, enjoyed teasing her when Kyo refused to take their bait. Sometimes, although it was usually by mistake, Tohru was able to take part in the witty repartee. But, when she realized what she had said, her cheeks often turned a bright red and everyone had a good laugh at her expense.

Tohru still helped Kyo clean the dojo as well. Occasionally, Tohru would say something that made the hair on the back of his neck stand up. Yet, soon she would go back to babbling and he could once again relax. Tohru talked about a lot of things while they worked. Her job, her friends, and her mother. She even brought up Yusuke. It was not unexpected, since he had obviously been such a large part of her life. But, at times, it was unwelcome. It was strange for Kyo to hear her life story again when it did not include the Sohmas.

She would often fish for information about him. Yet, his answers were rarely more than a few syllables long. They had exhausted almost every topic when it came to martial arts. He was unable to mention his friends or his mother. Kyo could tell Tohru was getting frustrated with him. They too were supposedly friends after all. Friends were meant to share parts of their life with one another and he had hardly given her an iota of personal information. Most of it was too risky and, in all honesty, he did not feel like reminiscing about the women that had come in and out of his life over the years. They all paled in comparison to Tohru anyway.

Some evenings were quiet. Like that one in particular. All that could be heard was the sound of the broom sweeping across the floor. This was only because Tohru had to work that evening and Kyo was alone. However, it was not uncommon for her to come by after work when she knew he would more than likely miss the bus. Therefore, Kyo was not at all surprised when he heard a small knock and Tohru entered the dojo.

He watched as she carefully slipped off her shoes. She was very mindful of what she was wearing. Kyo pretended not to notice Tohru had abandoned her work trousers a while ago. Her outfits had continually become more feminine even when she was helping clean. He thought, perhaps she was just more comfortable in her skirts and stockings. So, instead, Kyo shifted his gaze to her hands as she walked over to him.

"What's that?" Kyo nodded to the container she was holding.

"Onigiri," Tohru said as she took the lid off, "I brought them to work and had leftovers…."

Kyo stared down at the neatly packaged rice balls and nori. Onigiri? Of all things. He tried not to look as horrified as he was feeling. Don't be stupid, Kyo chastised himself, you know better. Onigiri was a normal thing any normal person in Japan ate. It did not mean anything else.

"…I thought you might be hungry..." Tohru went on.

Truth be told, he was hungry. Kyo reached for the rice ball but paused a moment. Remembering where he was.

"Don't worry," Tohru began, "there are no leeks in them!"

"That's not what I was worried about…." Kyo registered what she had said and tried not to scowl "…wait what?"

"You mentioned you don't like leeks," Tohru smiled "so, there won't be any surprises!"

Had Kyo mentioned he did not like leeks? He did not think he had. He had obviously been very careful with what he said. But, perhaps he thought it so insignificant he let it slip unnoticed.

"We're just not allowed to eat in the dojo," Kyo sighed, "bring them to the office."

"Okay!" Tohru replied cheerfully and followed him to the small room in the back of the dojo.

They had hardly made it into the office when Tohru's eyes lit up and beelined to the back wall. She had, of course, spotted the framed photos that were hung up in rows and almost overtaking the space. They were group photos, collected over the years and date stamped, of different members of the dojo. In typical Tohru fashion, she set the container of Onigiri down on the nearby desk and briskly walked towards them.

"How cute!" Tohru practically squealed as she admired the children in their little Karategi.

Some of the photos were black and white and ragged from the years that had passed. However, there was a quick transition on the wall where the photos became full colour. Kyo's hair stuck out like a sore thumb in every photo he was in.

"You're quite young here…" Tohru said, "…had you just graduated?"

Kyo had become somewhat consumed by the leftover Onigiri and looked up to see Tohru pointing at a photo of him from his first year of training. He quickly chewed and swallowed before answering, "Yes."

"I didn't know we graduated the same year!" Tohru turned to him with excitement.

All Kyo could do was nod.

"Are there any photos of you as a child?" Tohru started to search the wall.

"No," Kyo shook his head, "I didn't train here until that year."

"Oh, where did you train then?" Tohru asked.

"With my father," Kyo replied.

"And where was that?"

There she was again, fishing for answers he simply could not give.

The only thing Kyo could do was bring his attention back to the Onigiri. Even as he looked down he could feel her eyes boring in on him. He could feel her discontent. He hoped the moment would pass and she would once again get distracted by the photos. But, then, a sharp huff of air escaped her nostrils.

"Goodnight, Kyo."

Tohru breezed by Kyo without so much as giving him a second glance. She was heading for the exit. Ready to walk home alone out of spite. With an equally annoyed breath, Kyo abandoned the Onigiri to chase after her. Although, he had no idea what he was supposed to say.

"Tohru…wait!"

She was almost at the door when Kyo grabbed hold of her wrist. Tohru whipped around with her eyes narrowed. Kyo had never really seen her angry. Sure, he had heard her and Rin yell at one another and she and Kagura had apparently gotten in a fight. But, her anger had never been directed at him before.

"Why..." Tohru was trying to keep her voice steady but there was a little crack as she began "…why is it that whenever I try to get to know you, you shy away?"

"I don't think it's something I can explain!" Kyo was taken off guard, but he tried to not stammer. "Or something you would understand!"

Tohru took a second to consider what he had just said. After a moment, her face began to relax and her voice became softer, "I can try."

Now it was Kyo's turn to consider the correct response. Tohru had every right to be angry. She did not know he was trying to protect her. He hated lying to her. It's what got them in this mess in the first place. So, he told her as much of the truth as he could.

"I guess…" He said, "…I'm just worried."

"About what?" Tohru asked.

"About getting close to you," Kyo shrugged, "I've always been better at keeping to myself."

Tohru got quiet again as she carefully thought about what he had said. Then she looked at him with her wide eyes, "Are we…close?"

"Too close…I'm afraid," Kyo said as he gave her a quick smirk, which brought relief to her face.

Kyo felt some relief as well. He began to make his way back to the office to finish the Onigiri and knew she was close behind him. He thought, for the time being, he had managed to pacify her curiosity. But, of course, Kyo was incorrect, because almost immediately Tohru met his pace and was beside him. With another question rolling off her tongue.

"Who was it?" She asked.

"What?" Kyo raised his brow in confusion.

"Who made you afraid of becoming too close?"

How could he ever admit it was her?

Chapter Text

Tohru never got the answer she was looking for. Kyo simply changed the subject and complimented her excellent Onigiri instead. Tohru took the compliment but she could not say she was not disappointed. She wished she could just look at Kyo and know what he was thinking. The way he could with her. Somehow, he could just cock his head to the side and understand what was running through her mind.

He always knew when it was about to hit her. That tight feeling in her chest that she could not quite shake. He always knew what to say to try to make her feel better. He was respectful of her feelings and Tohru knew she needed to be respectful of his feelings. Even if it meant he could not answer her questions.

There were things burrowed under Kyo's exterior that Tohru may never know. She hoped one day he would open up to her. Tohru did not need to know everything. But, his last name would be a good start. She wanted to know what he was like before she met him. She often pictured his younger self as awkward and with a temper as wild as his ginger hair. Yet, this was just a guess.

One day…

The day Tohru and Kyo would stop spending their evenings cleaning the dojo together was coming quickly. It was, after all, only a month. But, Tohru was admittedly dreading that day. She did not know if they would still fill their free evenings with each other's company. Tohru had not thought about it before, yet now, she considered it strange that they had only seen the outside of their respective buildings. They spent most of their time together at the market, eating noodles, and cleaning. The two of them had a routine. Which was about to be disrupted.

Tohru could recall a time when she and her friends spent a great deal of time in each other's homes. Tohru would often get lonely in her empty apartment but Uo and Hana were always there on her doorstep ready to watch movies and drink. Tohru did not think Kyo was one for chick flicks and wine. But, she had caught on he was competitive. She was sure he would carry on a card game for hours until he won at least one round.

She could almost see it, them sitting across a table from one another, her trying not to laugh at his absolute concentration. She even imagined how Kyo, Uo, and Hana might get along if they one day met. She desperately wanted them to. Cards were always better in a group. Somehow, Tohru already knew her best friends would like Kyo and would enjoy teasing him. Yet, thinking about the potential banter between the three of them, for some reason, made her uneasy.

Tohru could not help but wonder why. Yet, she could not quite figure that out either. All she really knew, was she felt safe and sound and happier with Kyo, just as Yusuke had wished.

Everything was all around miserable when the end of the month came. Tohru, of course, was miserable because her time at the dojo, and potentially with Kyo, was ending. However, the weather was miserable too. She did not even know the last time she saw the sun shine. During the day, it was nothing but a dim circle in the sky, covered by clouds weighed down by rain. Sometimes, the clouds drizzled or let fat drops of rain fall from them. But, most of the time, they just loomed ominously over Takayama.

On top of everything, Tohru had to work for the majority of the evening. When her shift ended, she was quick to get to her locker and slip out of her uniform. She had a simple dress she wanted to change into hanging in front of her. For a moment, Tohru thought about the clouds, but she concluded that it would be fine. The dojo was only a short distance away after all, and she no longer got turned around when looking for it.

Before she left, Tohru glanced at herself in a mirror. Most of the time, she would not even give her reflection a second thought. Yet, this time, she could not help but notice she looked a little rundown. She splashed her face with some water before retreating to her locker to grab a small makeup bag.

When she was finally satisfied with how she looked, she began to make her way to the dojo. Although Tohru was quick to change, applying what little makeup she owned took her far longer than she would care to admit. It was getting late and, despite the humid air, colder. Tohru wrapped her arms around herself as gooseflesh started forming and the sky up above her began to turn a rather unfriendly colour.

As always, Tohru knocked gently on the dojo door before entering. She then slipped off her shoes and looked for Kyo. She found him in the middle of the pit, scrubbing God knows what off the floor.

"Sorry, I'm late!" Tohru called to him.

"It's fine. You're just in time to watch me struggle with this last stain here," Kyo replied sarcastically.

Tohru stood awkwardly at the entrance for a moment. She needed to work her way up to what she wanted to say to him. So, she tried to make their usual small talk.

"The clouds are so dark today, huh?"

"Mhm," Kyo just kept scrubbing.

"Do you think it's going to rain?" She queried.

Kyo looked up at her in surprise, "You really don't track the weather, do you?"

Tohru just blinked as confirmation.

"There's been a storm warning for days, Tohru," Kyo spoke pointedly.

"Oh," She replied.

"I guess that's why you're wearing…that…" Kyo gestured to her dress "…and not something more weather appropriate."

"I'll have you know this is my favourite dress!" Tohru meant to sound as though she was pouting, but she could not keep a straight face.

Kyo stopped scrubbing and playfully scoffed at her. "And what's so special about it?"

"Well, first of all," Tohru stomped her way into the pit and towards Kyo, "it has pockets."

Neither of them could stop themselves from grinning as Tohru's hands disappeared into the pink fabric. She began twirling around, trying to show the pockets off. Kyo was making oohs and ahhs. Then, Tohru let out a giggle right as the thunder rolled, the lightning cracked, and disaster struck.

The lights in the dojo flickered as a warning. Then, they went out all at once. Tohru let out a surprised gasp while Kyo let out a grumble. When the lightning sounded off again, she could not help but jump. Almost instinctively, she reached out for Kyo. Her fingers found the sleeve of his Karategi, and her grip tightened immediately.

Kyo reached across his body and placed his hand on hers as reassurance. "The storm must have knocked out the power."

Tohru gave him a little nod, even though he could not see her.

"I'll go see if I can switch the generator on." Kyo's hand fell from hers and then his Karategi slipped from Tohru's grasp as well. "Don't move."

Soon, she was standing in the middle of the dojo alone. She could hear Kyo off somewhere talking to himself and fiddling with what she assumed was the generator. Several minutes passed before there was a zap, and the lights came to life...for approximately three seconds. Kyo cursed as the lights went back down. Tohru called after him and took a step forward, hoping she was at least heading in his general direction. However, within the next few steps, she stubbed her toe.

"OW!" Tohru barked as she clapped her hands over her mouth.

"Will you stay where you are!" Kyo yelled.

Tohru froze. Truth be told she could not get her bearings. She was sure if the lights were to kick back on again she would be in one part of the dojo when she thought she was in another. Kyo, on the other hand, had memorized each creak in the floor. She could hear him padding his way towards her.

Suddenly, Kyo's hands slipped under her arms. Tohru let out another gasp as he lifted her out of the pit. For a moment, she was airborne. However, just as quickly, her feet were back on the floor. Yet, Kyo's hands remained on her sides until he was sure she had her footing. Tohru could feel how close she was to him. Only inches away from his chest. His warm breath mixing with hers.

"Are you okay?" Kyo asked.

Of course, she was okay. She had only stubbed her toe after all. But, Tohru could feel her face begin to flush. She was now glad they were still in the darkness.

"I don't deserve how kind you are you to me," Tohru whispered to him.

"Don't say that…" Kyo hissed. For a brief moment, Tohru swore his eyes were glowing.

"But I don't!" Tohru insisted.

Kyo did not respond. But she could imagine he was rolling his eyes at her. Maybe he thought she was silly for saying such things. But, she certainly believed it.

"Let's go," Kyo finally said after a long pause, “those lights aren’t switching on tonight.”

He grabbed her hand, and his vague silhouette began moving towards what she could only assume was the exit. Tohru held in a long sigh. Yes, Kyo is far too kind, she thought. She was taking advantage of his kindness. Of that, she was sure. He would probably be better off without her.

Yet, she could not bear to leave his side, for she had already fallen in love with him.

Chapter Text

A maid chatted away as she led Yuki through the estate. She was delighted to meet one of the young masters she had heard so much about. She was new and the Sohma secret did not hang over her head. She did not know that, even after so many years had passed, some maids still feared to talk to the former Zodiac because  of Akito. She also did not seem to know where she was going. Yuki reached for her shoulder as she turned down the wrong corridor and she gave him an apologetic look as they headed towards the office. 

Yuki had once again been summoned and he could not help but wonder if this was it. Had Akito finally made a decision? 

"Is it Akito I will be seeing today?" Yuki asked.

The maid nodded and Yuki believed her. 

Yuki had chosen to give Shigure the benefit of the doubt. Weeks had passed but, perhaps, he had been trying to talk to Akito the entire time. Akito had to know that one day the Sohmas would be unable to shadow Tohru. That there would come a time when they had to let her go. But, Akito was known for having a hard time letting go. 

When they reached the office, the maid knelt to knock and announce Yuki's presence. But, there was no answer. She gave Yuki another apologetic look. Yet, he just shrugged and let himself in. If Akito wanted him, he was there, and he would not be wasting his time.

No one even noticed Yuki when he slid open the door and walked in. Akito was there, pacing back and forth, consumed by thought. Shigure was there too, consumed by her. The old dog was sitting with a book, but his eyes were following Akito instead. Maybe Shigure was wondering if she would run grooves into the floor with her violent footfalls.

Yuki cleared his throat and finally both their gazes fell to him. Akito opened her mouth, perhaps to greet him, but her attention shifted before she could get one word out. Kazuma had entered behind Yuki.

“Ah good,” Shigure said in a sing-song voice, but his expression did not match his tone, “we’re all here.”

“What is this?” Yuki looked around the room in confusion.

Akito’s eyes narrowed at his question. “As if you don’t know.”

“We don’t, Akito,” Kazuma was as calm as ever.

“So, you’re not running around having secret meetings behind my back…concealing information from me…” Akito seethed “lying…and acting as though I am not the head of the family?”

“What do you mean?” panic began to rise in Yuki’s chest.

“Is Tohru not in Takayama?!” Akito shrieked.

Yuki turned to Kazuma. The martial arts master was still staring at Akito, but his composure faltered for a moment as his jaw set. Someone had told Akito. But who? Yuki thought. He could not imagine Yusuke ever contacting the main estate. Several weeks had passed since he had even heard from Tohru’s ex-fiancé. Then Yuki remembered a pair of shuffling feet entering Kazuma’s parlour with such urgency and the tiny frame that rested in corner of the room. Mio…the maid. She had heard every word.

Akito obviously kept track of the family and Yuki could not help but wonder which nameless clan member on the sidewalk watched him climb out of the town car. Like any family, secrets were like currency, and for the right price, who wouldn't fold? How could Yuki have been so stupid? He should have known better. But, he thought, if Kazuma trusted her…

"Why...why would you lie to me!?" Akito demanded. 

Yuki wanted to argue that they did not lie but simply withheld the truth while awaiting her decision. Yet now, he did not think Akito was ever informed she had one to make. Yuki turned his attention to the bastard who was still sitting while Akito bombarded him.

"Shigure."

"What about Shigure?" Akito snapped. 

"Oh, you know how she is," Shigure replied without a hint of remorse.

"What about Shigure?" Akito repeated. She refused to be ignored.  

“Shigure was supposed to talk to you,” Yuki said, "about stopping the search." 

Akito whipped her head in her husband's direction. “Shigure?”

"Yes, I think we've spent enough time and resources on her" Shigure said dismissively. 

Yuki knew what was coming next. Akito flew into a rage. There were only so many members of the family who were able to placate her when she was like this. But the one currently in the room seemed hellbent on making things worse.

Akito picked up the closest thing to her. A flower vase sitting on her desk. She truly had impeccable aim. But Shigure had come to have impeccable reflexes. Shigure dodged the vase from where he was sitting and the glass shattered on the wall behind him. More items clattered to the floor as Akito had her fit. 

Yuki and Kazuma both backed up. But Shigure stood, giving Akito a smile, and challenging her. Akito rushed towards him, yelling the worst things she could think of. Shigure held her back by the wrist as she clawed at his face. For a brief moment, Yuki wondered if their relationship was always like this. 

 “Now, now,” Shigure cooed at her, “watch your temper.”

“Why did I ever think I could trust you!” Akito yelled. “You and that idiot Yuki."

“Enough.” the demand fell from Yuki's mouth before he even realized what he was doing. 

Akito and Shigure paused their pathetic struggle to look at him. Yuki was fed up. Fed up with the Sohmas managing to dictate everything around him no matter how hard he tried to fight back. He may have chosen to forgive her but Akito had stolen too much from him through all the trauma she had inflicted. Shigure had used everyone around him like a pawn. But, Yuki would not allow it any longer. They would hear him and they would listen. 

 “I thought you were done playing games with people’s lives?” Yuki tried to speak calmly. “Haven’t you both gotten everything you wanted?”

A look of shame flashed across Akito's face and she softened slightly. She pulled her wrists from Shigure's grasp and let her arms fall to the side. "This...this is different! I'm just trying to protect Tohru. She wanted to forget. I'm just doing what she asked."

"There is no saying she has remembered anything," Kazuma interjected, "but if she is in Takayama now does that not tell you that perhaps she made a mistake?" 

"Since when did you start believing in fate, Kazuma?" Shigure raised his brow. 

"I do not believe in fate," Kazuma replied, "I believe in my son." 

"Kyo has proven time and time again the sacrifices he's willing to make for Tohru," Yuki said, "if you are truly worried, I will go to Takayama, and I will find him and warn him." 

“You will go to Takayama?” Akito looked surprised. 

“I will.” Yuki nodded. 

“And you will bring Hatori.”

“I will not.” Yuki knew what Akito wanted. Hatori was not some insurance policy. 

Rage returned to Akito’s face and she turned to Shigure. “Will you do something!” 

Shigure stared and assessed Yuki’s will. There was a time where Yuki would have shifted uneasily. But he was resolved. 

“Akito…” Shigure’s voice dropped to a whisper and he gave her a long look. Yuki had never known Shigure to seriously plea with anyone. Yet, that is exactly what it sounded like.   

"Fine." Akito huffed after a long consideration. "You will go and you will go alone."

"Thank you, Akito," Yuki bowed. Then he turned to Kazuma and darted his eyes toward the door. It was time for them to leave the office before Akito had a chance to change her mind. 

Yuki and Kazuma said goodbye and quickly made their leave. They were quiet as they walked back through the estate. But, when they were finally out of earshot, Kazuma spoke. 

"You know what you might be walking into, right?"

Yuki could not help but laugh. "Unfortunately, I do." 

Chapter Text

As they exited the dojo Tohru watched Kyo survey the sky above them. Somehow, it looked even worse than when she had arrived not half an hour ago. The streets of Takayama were empty. Which meant, the thunder and lightning were just the beginning, and the sky was preparing to open. They moved quickly as they tried to outpace the oncoming storm. Tohru could not deny she was pleased Kyo had yet to let go of her hand. With every rolling boom and loud crack, she tightened her grip, as though she could will some of his courage into her.

She was curious how Kyo could stand so tall. Everyone was had secrets. Everyone had pain. Despite Kyo not being forthcoming with information about himself Tohru could tell he had experienced his fair share. She could recognize it. She wondered if, even though he seemed so strong, there were days Kyo had no desire to speak or move. Or if he ever felt exhausted or broken. If he was ever so drained that all he could do was close his eyes and sleep.

Ever since her mother died, Tohru’s body just felt so heavy. She had promised herself that she would make her days as fulfilling and possible. Yet, even after years of trying, she is still so disconnected from everyone and everything.

Until she met Kyo.

He was unexpected. She truly did not expect him or the effect he had on her. He was calming. Like the gentle pitter-patter of rain. While she went through life like a destructive typhoon. Of course, Kyo did not take away all of her pain or solve all her problems. But, he also did not pity her or try to transition her into a higher society she did not understand. What really mattered was he wanted to spend time with her. And was willing to listen to her problems.

Sometimes Tohru was restless at the absolute oddest hours of the day. But, then she would just think of Kyo and feel better. She wondered why that was. But, more importantly, she wondered if she could ever have the same effect on him. Tohru thought that, perhaps, they had known each other in another life. Because, when she saw him, it felt like she was coming home. No one made her feel more like the person she was supposed to be than Kyo. Nothing felt safer than his presence.

Suddenly, a grumble came from Kyo’s throat. Tohru was about to ask him what was wrong but it turned out she did not need to. He had realized they were too slow just before the onslaught began. There was one last flash of lightning then the rain began. This time, it did not pour down in fat drops. Instead, it fell in sharp, violent sheets onto the pavement.

Kyo brought his gaze to Tohru. Then, he gave her one look of warning before he started to sprint. They probably could have moved faster, but she could tell Kyo was making sure she did not trip or slip as they crisscrossed the road trying to find cover.

The rain gushed from building gutters and pounded down on the eaves they hid under. In what little space they had, there were moments of relief before they continued on. At times, Tohru had to stand so close to Kyo she could feel his chest heaving as he tried to even out his breath. They did not waste much time catching their breath though. With just a simple nod they would take off when they were ready.

The storm was so heavy Tohru could not see two feet in front of her. She had no idea which way they were going or if they were even close to her apartment. But, Kyo seemed to know every street even in a torrential downpour.

Tohru sighed and Kyo dropped her hand as they slipped under one last awning. It did not take as long as she imagined to get to her building but it was definitely long enough. They were absolutely drenched. The dress Kyo had made fun of now clung to Tohru’s frame and caused her to shiver. She was also sure whatever makeup she had attempted to put on was now running down her face. Luckily, Kyo looked equally miserable with his great mop of orange hair stuck to his forehead.

“Oh no, let me get you a towel!” Tohru covered her mouth to try to hide her amusement.

“It’s okay…” Kyo tried and failed to push his hair out of his face “…really.”

“But…” Tohru scowled “…what if you get sick!”

“Alright, alright!” Kyo rolled his eyes. Somehow, she managed to change his mind.

“And, if you want, you can just wait out the storm in here!” Tohru offered.

“I don’t know,” Kyo began, “it’s already pretty late.”

“Please!” Tohru insisted. “I know how much you hate this weather.”

“Fiiiiine!” Kyo gave her a small smile as they shuffled into the lobby

Neither of them realized he had never told her how he felt about the rain.

No longer having to hide from the downpour they kept their distance in the elevator. Tohru still chatted merrily and did not notice Kyo’s eyes widen as the numbers climbed. She did not necessarily live in the penthouse. But, she was high enough that they could see the streamers of rain coming from the clouds quite clearly.

When they entered the apartment Tohru told Kyo to make himself comfortable as she slipped off her shoes and started looking for the most absorbent towels she could find. Yet, he was still hovering by the door, with his bag on the floor beside him, when she returned. He was probably concerned about getting the place dirty. Even though she was sure she had just dripped half the storm out onto the carpet.

Tohru smiled as she handed Kyo a towel. She meant to dry herself off as well but she just watched as he tried to soak up the rainwater. She had not been mistaken the night she bumped into him and thought he was beautiful. He really was. And she could not help but allow her gaze to linger on his lips as he let out an unhappy huff.

Suddenly, Kyo turned to her and their eyes locked.

“What?” He asked.

“Nothing!” Tohru’s cheeks flushed red as if she had been caught spying.

Kyo cocked his head to the side, the way he always did when he was trying to figure out what she was thinking. She needed to change the subject.

“Let me get you another towel!” Tohru offered “That one is already drenched.”

“Thanks,” Kyo replied as he held it out for her.

Tohru took a step toward him and their fingers brushed as he passed her the towel. She tried to remind herself that they were friends. But, how could she be just friends with him? Every time she looked at him she could not help but think how much more she wanted. All she had to do was take a chance and…

…Be brave…

Tohru took a deep breath. Her fear threatened to swallow her whole. But, she could no longer help herself. With one last step toward Kyo, Tohru poised herself on her tallest tiptoes until her lips fell on his.

For a moment, Tohru thought she made a mistake as Kyo’s body tensed. He was not kissing her back and she was filled with panic. Her stomach dropped thinking about what she was supposed to do. She was about to stop herself to explain. But, then the towel fell to a forgotten pile around their ankles as he pulled her body into his.

Tohru’s mind raced. Her hands rested on Kyo’s chest and his hands glided from her waist to her hips. They stumbled in unison until her back was against the wall nearest to them. With Kyo’s thumbs pressing into her hips, Tohru moved her arms and wrap them around his neck. Her fingers ran through his damp crown of hair she so often admired. His lips travelled to her neck and Tohru laughed as his breath tickled her.

It was strange. How many times had she kissed Yusuke? Too many to count at her age. Yet, it had never felt like this. There was a rush of ecstasy coursing through her entire body. It was all-consuming. She wished they could stay in each other’s embrace forever.

But, then he pulled away.

“…This…this…is wrong…” Kyo stuttered “…I have to leave…I have to go!”

Kyo turned on his heels. He reached for the doorknob and Tohru meant to reach for him. Yet, she was too mortified to even move. Then, before she knew it, he was gone.

She should have called after him. But his name stayed on the tip of her tongue as she stared at the door. Tohru took a step towards it, fully intending to chase after him and ask him what was so wrong about kissing her. But, she immediately became entangled in the towel at her feet. Her legs buckled beneath her and she hit the ground. Hard. Tohru let out a heavy sigh but prepared to stand back up.

Then, the headache hit.

Tohru had never felt pain like it before. It felt as though her brain was swelling inside her skull and threatening to breakthrough. Her hand clung to whatever was closest to her as she tried to keep herself steady. But soon her surroundings went dark and the last thing she heard was Kyo confessing how disappointed he was in her moral character.

Chapter Text

Kyo thought about turning around a million times as he barrelled through the empty streets. With every footfall in every puddle, he was taking himself further away from Tohru. He was running like a stupid teenager who did not know how to face his problems head-on. How had he once again not realized Tohru…

Had Kyo given Tohru mixed signals? They had simply fallen into a routine with one another. But, maybe, that was the problem. Had he gotten too comfortable and too familiar with Tohru like he had when they were seventeen? Had Kyo once again become careless?

Kyo admired Tohru. He adored her. He, obviously, loved her with his whole heart. All this is exactly why he should have known better. He never meant to kiss her back. Yet, when the moment came, he was weak. Kyo simply could not take it anymore. He wanted more than just lingering stares or accidental brush-ups in the market or friendly embraces. He wanted to taste her lip and neck. He wanted all of her.

But, hearing Tohru giggle in his ear brought him back to reality. 

What Kyo wanted to do did not matter. What he needed to do was what was important. He did not think he misspoke when he said it was wrong. It was not fair to kiss Tohru when she had no memory of their history with one another. 

Kyo was exhausted. It felt as though that reopened wound was bleeding out. He could not turn around. Not tonight. All he wanted to do was hide in his apartment. The same way he hid in the mountain when Kyoko died.

When he finally came to his building, Kyo paused for a moment to find his key. That was when he realized what he had done. Dammit, dammit, dammit! It took everything for Kyo not to scream. Once again, he had forgotten his stupid bag. It was still sitting at Tohru’s door.

Kyo sunk to the ground and leaned against the old brick. He was bordering on hysteria at this point. If he opened his mouth he might laugh or cry. But, he had already resigned himself to staying out there all night.

That is until his landlord was suddenly towering over him.

“Son, what on earth are you doing out here?” his landlord asked from under his umbrella.

Kyo looked up at him but did not answer.

“At this time?” his landlord continued “In this weather?”

Kyo just blinked.

“Well?”

“I don’t have my key.” Kyo finally replied. Or phone...or wallet…or dignity at this point.  

“Then you’re damn lucky I installed those cameras!”

Lucky would not be the word Kyo would use to describe that night. But, Kyo thanked his landlord anyway as he let him into the building then used his skeleton key to open the apartment. Kyo was only able to get out of his soaked clothing before falling into his bed.

…  

Kyo was not sure how much time had passed between falling into his bed and the morning where he opened his eyes and his head was no longer congested. Had he used the landline to call in sick once or twice? Perhaps it was three. Tohru had convinced him to dry off in her building because she was worried about him getting sick like her father. Kyo had agreed to pacify her. He should have known she would be right.

He was not capable of much. Just the robotic movements meant to keep him alive at least. When he was not sleeping, all he could do was lay motionless in bed, staring at the ceiling. The only good thing was he had time to think. Which was why he was now standing outside of Tohru’s building

Yes, Kyo needed to get his belongings. But, more importantly, he needed to apologize. No, he would never be able to explain why he ran out on her. But, he could ask for her forgiveness. Kyo took and deep breath and pressed on her apartment number. Yet, all that came back was static. He tried again.

Nothing.

It was possible that Tohru was not there. But, Kyo had a gut feeling she heard the ring and chose to ignore it. Maybe it was best to take a hint a leave her alone. But, Kyo could be just as stubborn as Tohru. All he had to do was wait…for an opportunity.

Kyo loitered by the entrance for what seemed like forever until a resident finally showed up. A tall, thin man in a fine suit, who could probably actually afford the building, buzzed himself in with his key card. Before the door could click behind the man, Kyo slipped inside. Perhaps, if he walked with enough confidence, no employee would question whether or not he belonged there. Yet, Kyo was sure he looked sick as the elevator shot up to Tohru’s floor.

As he walked down the hallway he could feel cold sweat pooling in the lines of his hands. He stood quite close to the door to listen for any movement behind it. There was only silence. With another deep breath, Kyo clenched his fist tightly and knocked.

“Tohru!” Kyo called.

He waited but there was no answer.

“Tohru…” Kyo called again. “…I meant to come by sooner…I really think we should talk.”  

For a moment, Kyo swore he heard rustling. Yet, her tiny figure did not emerge from inside. Maybe he was being rash. Or, maybe, he looked like a stalker. Maybe it would take more time than he knew for Tohru to even begin considering talking to him again. Kyo turned away.

It was only about halfway to the elevator did he hear a door open. Kyo spun around. His stomach dropped when he saw Tohru in the doorway. She looked as defeated as he felt. Her eyes were bloodshot and rimmed red. When Tohru opened her mouth to speak, her voice was hoarse, as if she had not said anything since he left.

“I…I wanted to be the year of the cat.”

Chapter Text

When Tohru came to the only thing she knew was that she ached from head to toe. As she unravelled herself from the fetal position on the floor she realized her body was bathed in a cold sweat. She did not know how long she had been lying there. Her only clue was the daylight that had begun filtering through the curtains. Tohru remained sitting on the floor for a moment, kneading her sore muscles and trying to find the strength to stand and face the truth.

Every joint in Tohru’s body popped and cracked as she rose. Her throat was scratchy. She filled a glass to the brim with water and took a long drink. Then another. Her stomach growled but she ignored it as she strode over to the window and opened the curtains.

The world seemed like a different place than the one she had last seen. Takayama was silent and dry. Not a single cloud hung over the city. It had always been strange to Tohru how quickly the sky could pull itself together after a storm. She used to be like the sky.

Yet, Tohru was not sure how to pull herself together now.

There was a reason Tohru thought she had been a different person once upon a time. There was a reason she had felt like a water-down version of herself for years. Tohru had lived an entirely different life before the ridge crumbled beneath her feet.

Tohru had lived with the Sohmas. She planted strawberries with Yuki. She listened to Momiji play the violin. She played with Kisa and cried with Rin. Almost everyone around her, including Hana and Uo, acted as though this part of her life never existed. She made a choice and people honoured it. Except, of course, for Grandpa. Who’s crazy babblings now made perfect sense.

As Tohru continued to look out at the city, thinking about her past, a feeling of great despair began to well inside of her. She could only think of so many Sohmas before her mind went back to Kyo. The person who held her heart in his hands then, just as he did now. The person who knew her deep-rooted fears. The person who blamed himself for Kyoko’s death.

Tohru’s mind could not process all the information flying at her. And so, she decided to numb herself. She could barely make it through the movements of changing before she collapsed into her bed. Which was where she remained for several days, surrounded by darkness, and staring at her bedroom wall. She missed work and did not call in to warn them. Perhaps, she should have felt guilty. But, Tohru did not have the energy to move. She did not sleep. All she did was stare. She did not want to think.

The first ring, indicating that someone wanted to visit her apartment, came one afternoon. Tohru ignored it. Moments later, there was another. Again, she ignored it, and whoever it was seemed to let her be after that. Or so she thought until the knocking came.

“Tohru!”

She was so startled by Kyo’s voice she had to cover her mouth to muffle a gasp. She figured it had been him ringing. But, how had he gotten into the building?

“Tohru…” Kyo's voice came again. “…I meant to come by sooner…I really think we should talk.” 

Talk? Did Tohru want to talk? She did not know if she was ready to face him.  

Kyo did not call her name again. After a while, she could hear his footsteps heading towards the elevator. She was going to let him leave. But, just like the night she ran into him coming off the bus, she could not help herself. In a moment of impulse, Tohru found herself flinging her bedsheets off her body and running to the door. Kyo must have heard the door open because he spun around as soon as her bare feet began to cross the threshold.

They both paused. For a moment, they just stared at one another. Neither daring to speak. Kyo was perhaps there to apologize for running out on her. But, there was now more hanging in the air between them he needed to know.

“I…I wanted to be the year of the cat.” The sentence stumbled out of Tohru’s mouth before she could stop herself. Kyo just continued to stare as he tried to register what she had said.

Then, a sorrowful look fell upon Kyo’s face. “You remember?”

“Y-yes…”

Tohru’s voice broke and she held back tears as she spoke. The last thing she wanted to do was breakdown in front of him. Although it was now clear it was something he was used to.

As Kyo gawked at Tohru in disbelief, she could not help but wince. Looking at him sent shivers down her spine and a rush of images through her mind. It was painful to relive how happy they were. Until the accident.

Tohru wanted to hate Kyo. He had destroyed her and who she was. But, how many times had he also made her feel like sunshine? Even now, remembering their past, she could still see a future with him.

“When?” Kyo finally asked.

When had she started to remember? It seemed as though bits and pieces of her memory were being unlocked ever since they first crossed paths in Takayama. Yet, Tohru simply answered, “The other night.”

“Tohru…you have to understand…” Kyo was stunned “…no wait…you don’t have to…”

Tohru glanced inside her apartment as Kyo stuttered. She thought about asking him to come inside, some of her neighbours had to be home, and would not want to come across the awkward exchange happening. Yet, just as she was about to invite him in to talk, she spotted his bag.

A scoff escaped Tohru’s mouth.

Kyo cut himself off and his eyes widened.  

“Why did you come here?” Tohru could hear the anger creeping into her voice.

“To talk…?” confusion riddled Kyo’s face “and apologize?”   

“Not for this?” Tohru reached inside and held out his bag.  

“Well, yes…” Kyo took his bag, “…but also to talk!”

“I don’t want to talk to you,” Tohru said, flatly. She now regretted ever opening the door.

“Tohru, please!” Kyo begged.

“Just…” Tohru spat “…just leave me alone, Kyo!”

She did not mean to slam the door. It was not in her nature to be so harsh. But his pleading eyes made her heart twist and ache in her chest. A loud, long, ringing noise reverberated off the walls as she forcefully shut the door in his face and thought, perhaps, she could hate him. Maybe, he could be a bad man, just like her father.

Chapter Text

By the time Yuki had arrived in Takayama the day had already dawned, crisp and clear. Rays of sunlight slipped through his lonely passenger car window and woke him up. Yuki had never been a morning person but he was particularly out of sorts that morning. He had decided he would go to Kyo first. It was easier to find Kyo since Kazuma had his address.

It was strange to think of seeing Kyo again after so long. They had not spoken of Tohru. Not since Kyo transferred high schools so many years ago. Yuki could not help but wonder how Kyo would react. There are certain people Kyo had never been able to speak of. People who meant too much. People whose name's Yuki knew left a sinking feeling in Kyo's soul. The first person was his mother. The second was Kyoko. Then Tohru had been added to that list as well.

Yuki grabbed his duffle bag as the train came to a halt. He had thought about ordering a town car. But, Kyo's apartment was that not far away. A simple jaunt, really. Perhaps the morning air would do his mind some good.

As he walked, Yuki could not help but notice how charming the city was. Even though he lived in a more rural area of Tokyo, there was far less hustle and bustle in Takayama. He could see why Kyo chose to stay there. Tohru as well.

When Yuki made it to Kyo's building he pressed the number Kazuma had instructed him to. For a moment there was a dull ring. Then Kyo answered.

"Hello? Who is it?"

Clearly, he was not used to unannounced visitors.

"Kyo?" Yuki began.

"Yes?" he replied.

"It's Yuki."

Yuki could not be sure, but he thought he heard Kyo swearing under his breath.

"Come on up…" this time Yuki knew he was not mistaken when Kyo sighed.

Yuki had not entirely decided how to go about telling Kyo that Tohru was in the city. Now, as Yuki walked to Kyo's door, he was out of time.

Kyo opened the door just as Yuki was about to knock. He did not look thrilled to see him but Yuki guessed that was a given. Although they had stopped competing with each other years ago there was still tension in the air between them.

As Yuki entered the apartment he peered at his surroundings. It was clearly the home of a bachelor, although far less filthy than any room in Yuki's house would ever be. He decided to lead with the fake niceties expected of someone.

"You have a lovely home," Yuki said.

Kyo snorted and cut straight to the chase, "Why are you here?"

"I'm on business in the area." Yuki continued to tiptoe.

"Did Shishou send you?" Kyo raised his brow. Who else in the family, besides Kagura, had any interest in his life after all?

"Actually, no," Yuki replied, "Akito did."

Panic crossed Kyo's face. "Why?"

"Tohru is here."

Yuki meant to be much more eloquent when telling Kyo, but what else was he supposed to say?

Kyo's face fell but he did not say anything. He did not have to. Yuki knew immediately.

"What have you done?" Yuki sunk down on to Kyo's couch and placed his fingers on his temples. Not even five minutes with the stupid cat and he was suddenly on the verge of a headache.

Yuki tried to sit quietly and withhold judgment as Kyo informed him of all his and Tohru's adventures over the last month. Yet, his jaw set almost at once and at one point he had to unfurl his fists. Kyo truly was one of the densest people he had ever met. Well, at least when it came to Tohru.

When Kyo was done, all Yuki could do was sigh.

"How is it exactly that you have done more damage than before?"

"Well, it's not like meant to," Kyo snapped.

"That's not the point, you idiot." Yuki barked back.

Yuki took a deep breath. Even after so many years, he and Kyo could still get each other riled up.

"It's not like it matters anymore, anyway," Kyo huffed.

Yuki was about to respond when his phone began to buzz. He could not help but jump a little. He should have kept the stupid thing on silent. Or…maybe not. He picked up his phone as Uo's name flashed on the screen.

"Please, don't tell Akito."

"It's not Akito" Yuki replied as he read the text message.

YUKI! I JUST GOT OFF THE PHONE WITH TOHRU. SHE'S IN TAKAYAMA.

Yuki typed his response as quickly as he could. I am here too...with Kyo. 

Yuki watched as the typing indicator popped up then disappeared before popping up again. It took quite some time for Uo to formulate her reply.

I AM GOING TO KICK HIS ASS.

Yuki pressed his lips together as he tried not to laugh.

Uo's typing indicator popped up again.

She's leaving. I don't know where she plans on going. But, she's not going to be in the city much longer.

Yuki set down his phone and looked back up at Kyo.

"It was Uo"

Kyo's face paled. Now Uo, and probably Hana, knew everything too. He was likely imagining all the hell they were prepared to raise.

"Dammit," Kyo groaned, "I just wish…I just wish I could…"

"What?"

"I wish I could go back to the night we met and tell myself what the hell I was supposed to do!" a look of sorrow crossed Kyo's face.

Admittedly, Yuki had some sympathy for Kyo. It was not every day the girl you loved becomes a stranger then unexpectedly crosses your path years later. Perhaps there was no right choice Kyo could have made.

"She's leaving Takayama, Kyo." Yuki finally said.

Yuki could practically feel the sudden sense of dread that began to consume the former cat. Kyo stood, silent and still, for a very long time. Thinking about what Yuki had just said. She would we gone once again. Unless...

Yet, the words that left Kyo’s mouth did not match what Yuki was thinking.  

"She's always seen me for who I am…it sounds to me like she's finally realized she deserves better," Kyo shrugged nonchalantly as if saying such a thing was easy.

"Oh, will you get over yourself!" Yuki moaned "Do I have to beat some sense in to you again?"

Kyo opened his mouth the argue but Yuki would not let him speak until he was done.

"Don't you see that this is it?" Yuki continued, "This is your opportunity to go after her and make things right!"

"Then why do I have this horrible feeling sitting in my stomach telling me that's the wrong idea?"

Yuki sighed. "Your instincts are screaming at you to run…going after Tohru is reckless, it goes against logic…it's complicated…"

Kyo nodded

"…but have your instincts ever done you any good when they told you to run?"

"What if she says this is it?" Kyo swallowed. "What if she doesn't want to be with me anymore?"

"If she tells you she does not want to be with you anymore, you will just have to smile," Yuki knew that may be the reality Kyo had to face, "you will have to meet her gaze, with all the courage your broken heart can muster, and say goodbye to her one last time."

Kyo remained silent.

"But this is it, Kyo," Yuki said, "no matter what she says, this is your do-over."

Chapter Text

“This is your do-over”.  

Yuki’s words echoed in Kyo’s mind. How many times had he wished for a do-over? How angry had he been when he knew he would not get one?

For a very long time, Kyo had lived in anger. He used it as a means of survival. It was easier to be angry when the world was working against him. But, the longer that anger lived in him, unchecked and unbalanced, the more poisonous it became. The first time Kyo met Tohru was arguably the worst year of her life. Yet, She went on making friends out of strangers and radiating warmth. Despite not having her mother’s arms to fall in to.

Tohru became the reason Kyo woke up every day and the reason he smiled. She taught him that, at some point, he had to stop being so angry. That he needed to be gentle with himself because bad people…haunted places…and even curses…could eventually be overcome. She was the best person to ever come into his life.

Twice.

Kyo may never get a do-over with his mother or Kyoko. Yet, now he had one right in front of him. All he had to do was take it. All he had to do was go to Tohru…all he had to do was tell her…

“Alright that’s enough,” Yuki sighed.

Kyo snapped out of the thoughts he had been so engrossed in and watched Yuki stand. The former rat began walking in the direction of the door. As Yuki passed Kyo he grabbed him by the upper arm and started dragging him along. Surprised, Kyo dug his heels into the floor and ripped his arm from Yuki’s grip.

“What the hell are you doing...get off of me!”

“We’re going to the train station,” Yuki said simply.  

“I had already decided that stupid…” Kyo began “…wait...we?”

“Yes,” Yuki replied, “someone has to guarantee you actually make it there.”

Kyo rolled his eyes as he walked the rest of the way to the door himself. It sounded more like the rat bastard wanted to see a show. But, Kyo knew there was no way to stop Yuki from following him anyway.

“Fine,” Kyo said as he slipped on his sneakers, “let’s go.”

Kyo and Yuki exited the building and headed back in the direction of the station Yuki had just come from. What started out as a brisk walk quickly turned into a sprint. At some point, over the last several years, Kyo had become faster than Yuki. As they ran, the former rat fell behind. Yet, Kyo was far too focused on the task at hand to notice.

As Kyo ran he could hear his heart hammering in his ears. He was taking a massive risk. Tohru had chosen to leave him once before. She had chosen to forget the colour of his eyes and the sound of his voice. Kyo had packed Tohru in the attic of his mind and stored her in his thoughts for all these years. If she chose to leave again, he could not do that a second time.

It did not take long to get to the station at the speed at which he was moving. He burst through the doors and shouldered through the throngs of people trying to make their way to different platforms. Kyo did not know which way she would be heading and chose to take a gamble at the very first set of fare gates he came to. Within seconds, Kyo braced his hands on either side of the gate and quickly hoisted himself over the doors. He could faintly hear the protests of a security guard telling him he needed to pay. But, he was already halfway gone by the time the sentence was finished.

When Kyo made it to the center of the platform he finally paused. He whirled his head around desperately looking for Tohru. Yet, he could not spot her anywhere. He was either too late, too early, or on the wrong platform entirely. The latter was confirmed when he caught sight of her small figure with a suitcase on the platform opposite of him.

Shit.

Kyo quickly turned back toward the fare gates. He could see the security guard walking towards him. Kyo stared at the guard and quickly did the calculations. The man had a large waist and short legs and Kyo knew he could outrun him easily.

“Excuse me, young man!” The security guard began as Kyo rushed past him and made his way off the platform. “Stop!”  

Kyo raced around the station trying to find the correct fare gate. He could hear the security guard chasing after him as his feet pounded on the tile behind him. At some point, Kyo was sure had caught Yuki’s silver hair in the corner of his eye. But, he did not stop.

By the time Kyo had made it over the fare gate and on to the correct platform he was covered in a layer of sweat. He tried to steady his breathing. Yet, it was an impossible task now that she was so close.

“Tohru!” Kyo called, but, the audio system announcing arrivals was muffling his voice.

Kyo continued to shout her name. People turned their heads as he pushed his way through the crowd. It was not until he grabbed hold of her wrist did Tohru even notice he was there.  

“Kyo…what are you…” Tohru’s gaze suddenly shifted before she could finish her sentence “…Yuki-kun?”

Kyo turned his head to see Yuki just a few feet away from them. He had managed to outrun the guard as well. The former rat gave Tohru a small wave but did not move from where he was standing.

The three of them had already gathered an audience. Yet, more eyes fell on them as the security guard finally caught up. Yuki calmly turned to block his path. Kyo could see Yuki handing the security guard what he could only guess was a large sum of money for the trouble they had caused.

 “What…” Tohru stammered as she looked back and forth from Yuki to Kyo “…what is happening?”

This was it. Whatever pride Kyo had remaining he had to swallow. He had to do it. Even if it was in front of everyone on the platform. Even if it was in front of that rat bastard.

 “Look, I need to talk to you,” Kyo begged, “and I know you don’t have to listen to me but really need you to.”

In all honesty, Kyo could not be certain if Tohru would listen to him. She had been so upset the last time she saw him and she was certainly taken off guard as they stood on the platform. She had every right to drown out his words and walk away. Thankfully, however, Tohru’s anger had subsided. She stared at Kyo with curiosity and remained rooted. Kyo raised his brow and Tohru gave him a small nod.

Kyo took a deep breath.

“I was selfish. Then and now. I have this habit of only thinking of my wants and needs. When I told you I was disillusioned, it was unfair and untrue. I have seen every part of you. Your faults, weaknesses, and struggles just like you saw mine.”

Tohru’s face strained as he spoke.

“You stayed by my side in spite of all that. I wanted to do the same for you the moment you showed up in Takayama. But I messed up. I hurt you. I ran away. I just hated knowing that I let the person I love down again. There are no words to describe how sorry I am for that.”

“Kyo…” Tohru spoke softly as tears began to fill her eyes.

 “I know it might be a stupid...but, I just need to know...is there a possibility for you and me? In this lifetime. Or if that is too much to hope for?”

Kyo paused to give Tohru the opportunity to speak. Yet, she seemed unable to utter a single word as she stared at Kyo. Her fingers hovered above her lips and trembled as tears silently rolled down her cheeks. All he could do was continue.

“I know it’s probably the worst thing you could do. I’m under no illusion that when you chose to forget that was meant to be the end. But...I want to try...if you do.”

With that, Kyo had finally run out of things to say. The platform had become completely silent. Except for the overhead audio that filled the air with static. Kyo’s chest felt unbearably tight. He had thought about what he was going to say to Tohru a million times over. But, even the right words can mean so very little when they’re said too late.

As they stood there in silence the train sped into the station. Tohru’s hair whipped around her and this time Kyo resisted the urge to tuck it out of the way. The train was meant to take her away. He would let it if that is what she wanted.

 “Do you…do you really mean it?” Tohru asked suddenly. “Do you really mean you love me?”

“Of course, Tohru,” Kyo took a step closer to her, “and I regret ever making you doubt that.”

Tohru’s breath caught in her throat. Her eyes glimmered as she wiped her tears away.

“I love you, Kyo” Tohru swallowed “but…”

There was always going to be a but.

“But,” Kyo sighed, “you have a train to catch.”  

“You didn’t let me finish,” all at once Tohru’s voice was very calm.

Kyo cocked his head to the side.

“I was going to say I love you, but…” Tohru gave him a small smile, “I know in the years to come, I will love you even more.”

At that moment, hearing those words, everything except for Tohru faded. Her eyes shot down as her cheeks flushed red. Kyo placed his hand under her chin and raised her eyes to his. He looked her over, tracing the shape of her lips with his thumb, before closing the remaining distance between them.

Chapter Text

Time passed gently. Days turned into weeks. Weeks turned into months.

Autumn transformed the world into a canvas of deep reds, warm yellows, and rich browns to be admired by wide eyes. When Winter arrived, so did the cold. Buildings and land alike became enveloped in layers of snow. The days grew shorter but breathtaking illuminations counteracted the darkness. However, the best was yet to come when the snow melted into Spring.

Spring was when the cherry blossoms bloomed. The pale pink petals fell with the ebb and flow of the wind and created a bouquet of creamy vanilla and soft almond. It was an unmistakable aroma. One that signified so much more than the changing season.

But, they sure did make a mess.

"Kyo!"

He had been in the middle of picking a cherry blossom petal off one of Hayato's fish when he heard his name. He turned to see Tohru was making her way across the market. She was waving at Kyo with her free hand while sliding a newly acquired jar of kimchi into her bag with the other.

Although it was not Monday, the Spring festival was starting soon. For two days the tranquil city would be packed with tourists. It would be the first festival Kyo and Tohru spent together in Takayama. They had gone back to Tokyo the year prior and missed the Autumn festival all together. For days, Tohru had been buzzing just thinking about the festivities. However, Kyo had warned her that they had to get groceries before the market became immovable.

Kyo immediately noticed that Tohru's bag was becoming a burden and reached his hand out. At first, Tohru looked as though she was not going to give it to him out of sheer stubbornness. But, as she adjusted it on her shoulder Kyo gave her a knowing look. With a gentle sigh, she finally handed the bag over. But, Kyo was taken aback by the weight as he placed it on his own shoulder.

"Are we planning on feeding the whole city?" Kyo chuckled.

"No! But, Uo and Hana get here tomorrow!"

"Right."

The smirk fell from Kyo's face. How could he have forgotten the greatly anticipated arrival of their guests? He still was not entirely sure how Uo and Hana coincidentally both had time off falling perfectly in line with the Spring festival. But, he knew better than to ask. He was just thankful neither one of them showed up the day Tohru moved into his apartment.

"That is…" Tohru began "…if it's still okay!"

Kyo scoffed and rolled his eyes. Uo and Hana were pains in his ass. However, even if they usurped his spot in the bed and ate all the groceries they would always be welcome.

"Of course."

Tohru beamed. 

She was so happy to spend the festival with Uo and Hana. But, she was even happier to spend it with Kyo. Tohru knew he had been hesitant about staying in Takayama for the Spring festival. While the cherry blossoms were wonderful to behold, there was more to them than meets the eye. They were a reminder of how fleeting life truly was. One of the most important parts of sitting under a cherry blossom tree was commemorating lost loved ones. Tohru wanted Kyo to be able to do that without any feelings of regret or guilt.

Tohru had to remind Kyo that, even if Kyoko said she would not forgive him, it did not come from a place of hate. She knew her mother and she knew her mother's heart. Kyoko was no longer an angry or lonely teenager when she died.

It was time to shed any feelings of regret or guilt. It was time to look at their own precious lives with wonder. For, whether it was fate or not, Tohru and Kyo were now irrevocably linked.

"Do you need anything else?" Kyo asked.

Tohru shook her head, "I think I have everything we need."

As they prepared to leave Kyo slipped his hand into Tohru’s. It was so reassuring to have his fingers intertwined with hers. Tohru squeezed his hand and Kyo squeezed hers back tenderly.

"What would you like for dinner?" Tohru asked.

"I want…" Kyo began, but stopped and ran his free hand through his hair. "Never mind what I want…what do you want?"

Tohru did not say it aloud for she still got embarrassed about the strangest things. But, she could tell Kyo knew as a smile crossed his lips. I want you. Always you.