Chapter Text
Two hearts, one valve
Pumpin' the blood, we were the flood
We were the body and
Two lives, one life
Stickin' it out, lettin' you down
Makin' it right
***
The first time they saw each other was at Alfie’s bakery, as he would call it. A sheer business meeting that had been pending. Alfie had sent the man a telegram without exactly knowing who he was awaiting. He had heard a lot about the Peaky Blinder - in the area of horse-racing bets one always heard something about the other people involves - but he would only get the details during their first encounter, he understood.
Tommy had seemed so strong and yet fragile. He had looked like shit, beaten up, but his glances had been intense. So intense and determined that Alfie had been able to overlook the rest. The wound that stood out against his cheek. The cheeks that appeared to be a little bit sunken.
Tommy’s right eye had been bloodshot, but he had been holding his own. Had tried the brown bread. Judging by the look on Ollie’s face, it had been amusing when Alfie had remarked that it didn’t correspond his rank. He was a boss, not a worker. One who ignored his nosebleed and even put alcohol last when he had to do business first.
He had sticked to his opinion and Alfie could only admire him for that. This was a worthy ally, he had noticed as he had pointed his gun at his head. He hadn’t even batted an eye and had stayed calm while Alfie had threatened him. Maybe a little bit too calm and also a little bit to serious for Alfie’s taste, but he was a man who looked presentable. One who had the determination needed to work together with the police and to join forces against other people.
The last time they saw each other was after Alfie had written him a letter. The letter that showed Tommy where he had to look for him.
It had been the right decision to retire to Margate. It was a beautiful, calm place, far away from the conspiracies that took place in London. It was about time to start living a quieter life - something Tommy would probably never consider for himself.
When Alfie reflected on it all, then he had actually started to hate the loud city a little bit. All the noise, the fights, the business. He didn’t need them anymore. Even if he didn’t like to say it out loud, he got older, maybe too old for the burden the wealth involved.
Maybe he had also got everything he needed. Admitted to himself that some things were out of his league. That it was better to leave it all behind.
Maybe the only thing of importance was that he had met Tommy. That he - somewhere deep in his heart - couldn’t bear hearing about the danger the man exposed himself to. He feared for him. Every time he noticed something, his hands were trembling. Sometimes he simply threw his hands up in horror, clenching his fists afterwards. Tommy definitely knew how to evoke a wide spectrum of emotions of his acquittances.
But it weren’t always only the bad emotions he evoked. Alfie still couldn’t help smiling when he thought about their good sex. How Tommy’s moans sounded more and more beautiful every time he came.
He had grabbed Tommy in his arms for a while. Had run his fingers through his hair and felt the arms wrapping around his body. Damn, he had even grown fond of the tattoos on them, had traced them with his fingers. The sinful lips nipping at his earlobe had been way too good, too. He hadn’t wanted to let him go, and still it had been necessary. This was probably their common destiny: An eternal back and forth, no hope for real rest.
Or was it the time he had secretly observed him that counted? Ha had looked so beautiful, sitting on the horse. How was its name again? Dangerous? Grace’s Secret? Monaghan Boy? Tommy had told him about all of them while they had cuddled each other, but if Alfie was honest, he was still more than just confused regarding the names. Quite apart from the fact that other things had been more important at that moment…
He had felt like a little boy. Had been standing there secretly, with a safety distance. This was Tommy’s territory. A territory he didn’t belong to. It wasn’t their coming place where they shared their secrets. And still he had repaired their as he had missed him. He did it in spite of himself. How could it be any other way when weeks had passed since he had heard the voice the last time? Since he had felt the touched on his skin, the words gently whispered into his ear? Tommy didn’t really show everybody how eloquent he actually was, but he knew how to make Alfie’s flesh crawl in a pleasant way. One that only the tender words out of his mouth could cause.
But this or that way, Tommy had looked gorgeous. Somehow calm, in harmony with nature. The big, black horse had looked mighty. Somehow solid, and still Tommy had been sitting on this throne without fear. A reckless but brave man.
Or was it maybe the photo he still had that counted?
In the past, he always had had to hide it, he could still remember it. How would the others have reacted if they would have discovered it? Nobody should now how much Tommy meant to him except the Gypsy himself. He was his weak spot, if you want to call it that.
The man he had to protect at all costs. Even if it meant hiding some memories.
This way, their last encounter could be as long ago as Alfie wanted it to be. Anyway, it had always been Tommy’s whole appearance rather than his words that spoke for him - a quality Alfie could only admire.
But now, he didn’t have to hide the photo. There were only other two people who could catch sight of it, therefore it didn’t matter. It wasn’t a problem if he left it in plain view one time. However, he preferred not to shout it from the rooftops. Every now and then it perhaps felt quite good to still have a secret.