Archive of Our Own

Chapter Text

It shouldn’t have come as a surprise, really. Lena should’ve known that even death wouldn’t stop her brother from messing with her head and playing some deranged psychological games with her. She’s tired. Oh god, is she tired. After everything that’s happened, Kara’s lies, the trigger Lena pulled to put an end to her own brother’s manipulative mind games. She’s absolutely exhausted.

He’s dead, but of course, it’s far from over.

It was a regular night. Lena spent most of her time at L-Corp, burying herself in whatever work she could get her hands on. If she isn’t in her office, she’s keeping herself busy with experiments in her private lab. She wasn’t even planning on going home, really, she could’ve just crashed on the couch in her office. However, she realized she can’t possibly go to work in the same outfit again the next morning, she’d already noticed a few concerned looks shot her way from employees.

So maybe she hasn’t been home in two days. Her large penthouse feels cold and more unwelcome than ever when she flicks the light on. Lena moves to hang her coat on the rack when her heel digs into a white envelope on the floor. Lena frowns and leans forward to pick it up. When she turns the envelope around to reveal the backside, her body freezes.

My dear sister

Lena swallows thickly and closes her eyes, already feeling an enormous migraine coming up. With the rhythmic clacking of her heels onto the ceramic tiles, she walks over to her kitchen and flings the envelope on top of the counter. Instantly, Lena approaches her liquor cabinet and pulls a bottle of whiskey out. Masterfully, she removes the cap with a flick of her thumb and pours herself a glass. She eyes the envelope when she downs her drink, wishing she could just pretend it didn’t exist, that the handwriting didn’t look awfully familiar to her.

Loudly, Lena puts her glass on the counter and takes a deep shaky breath, trying to mentally prepare herself for what’s to come. Lena grabs the envelope again and rips it open. She throws the remnants of the envelope away and unfolds the parchment inside.

My dear sister,

Did cancer finally get the better of me? Or did I meet my fate differently? Either way, if you receive this letter I must be dead. I’m sure you’re mourning me, sister, you’ve always been too emotional for your own good.

Lena shivers, almost hearing her brother’s voice through the written words. Her eyes widen when she reads on.

Now, I can’t leave this world without dropping one last bomb, can I? I’m giving you a name, Alodie Byrne, the rest you’ll have to find out yourself. Which, I know you will.

Don’t say I never gave you anything, Lena. And don’t say our father never made any effort.

Lex.

Lena stares at the parchment for a moment and two words in particular. Alodie Byrne. It’s her mother, it has to be. But why would Lex bother giving her the name of her dead mother after all this time?

Lena moves towards her couch and grabs her laptop, which was still on sleep-mode. She presses a random button to activate it and types away, searching on various combinations of the woman’s name with events, locations, dates… And absolutely nothing comes up. It’s as if the woman’s entire life has been erased. Only a few Facebook accounts from strangers pop up who happen to share the same name.

She didn’t expect to get any results. It would’ve been way too easy. No, they’ve obviously made sure not to leave a single trace of her existence.

Lena sits back and puts her cold hand flat against her forehead, easing the aching sensation a little. She sighs and closes her eyes, thinking as deeply as her exhausted brain allows her.

After a moment, Lena’s eyes snap open again and her fingers rapidly tap away on her keyboard. She can’t hack a ghost, but she can in fact access her father’s files from L-Corp. Within a minute, she’s in, her eyes searching and scanning through the familiar database. Lena scrolls through her father’s old projects and experiments. Some of them date back ten years, twenty even. Lena eyebrows shoot up.

07-06-1997 Patient AB

Lena’s heart skips a beat. 1997 is the year, the year her entire life changed. It’s the year her mother died.

With a shaky hand, Lena clicks on the entry.

08-06-1997 Patient AB

Entry #1

Traumatic head injury. Hypoxemia from near-drowning. Is kept in a medically induced coma. Has yet to show any progress. Chances of a full recovery are slim. 

Lena stops breathing. Did Lionel take her mother to L-Corp instead of a hospital? But more importantly: did she- did she survive?

She reads through the entries all night, not even noticing the hours ticking by or the light outside changing. Her bloodshot eyes flicker across the words on the screen, eventually she reaches entry #763 and she stills when she realizes it doesn’t go further. It’s the last entry, three years after the incident at the beach.

11-10-2000 Patient AB

Entry #763

I’ve concluded the treatment, without results. She barely talks and when she does, it doesn’t seem like she recognizes me. I don’t see her improving any time soon. I have to let her go. For everyone’s sake. It’s time to move on. I’ll have her transferred to St. Mary’s Mental Institution tomorrow.

Lena’s heart is pounding wildly. Her father’s words are heart-breaking. But she might still be alive…

Barely a minute passes by before Lena has found the institution’s full address and visiting hours. She shoots off a quick message to her assistant saying she won’t be in tomorrow, today actually, Lena realizes when she notices the time on her phone. She sighs and throws her phone on the couch next to her before giving in to her body’s wishes and moving towards her large bed for a well-needed nap. She falls asleep as soon as her head hits the pillow and doesn’t open her eyes until it’s well after noon.

Fuck. Lena flutters with her eyes, willing the headache away. At this point she’s not even sure what causes her migraines anymore, they’re just always there like a constant companion.

Lena forces herself out of bed and enters the bathroom for a quick shower. It’s going to be a very long day.

She takes a deep breath before turning the key in the ignition. According to Maps, it’s only a three hour drive. For three hours and twenty minutes straight, she stopped to grab a bite once she realized she hadn’t eaten since the morning before, it’s completely silent in the car. She doesn’t even bother putting her usual playlist on, her brain keeps reciting the entries and Lena’s almost sure she knows them all by heart by now.

Eventually, she reaches the large grey building that marked her destination. It stands tall against the clouds and Lena shivers just thinking about living there. It reminds her of the Luthor Estate and how she felt that very first day. She’d felt so small and alone, so absolutely terrified. Those exact same feelings are weighing down on her shoulders all over again.

She parks her car in a visitor’s parking spot and walks through the large uninviting doors. She’s met with a reception counter and an older woman, named Corrie according to her nametag, behind an outdated computer. It’s clear that the building hasn’t seen an update since the early 2000’s.

“Name?” Corrie asks, without looking away from her screen. She absentmindedly hands Lena a clipboard with a pen attached. Lena raises an eyebrow, but writes her name in the next available blank space. When she’s done, Corrie takes the clipboard back and glances down at it.

“Lena Byrne? Alodie family of yours?” Corrie squints up at her. “Actually, I can see the resemblance.” She adds with a somewhat friendly smile.

Lena silently stares at her, the joy she feels at the realisation that her mother is in fact still alive rushes through her body. She realizes it’s probably better not to reveal too much and slips her well-practiced mask back on.

“Where can I find her?” Lena asks instead.

“Room 53, just down the hallway. Oh, and take this. Just clip it on.” Corrie hands her a red badge with a large V on it, before turning back towards her screen.

Lena blankly looks at the badge in her hand before attaching it to her coat.

“Thank you.” Lena offers quietly, already looking towards the long white hallway on her right. Her heels click against the tiles, making a couple of surprised heads turn in her wake. She spots room number 33, 40, 50… Lena rounds a corner and halts her step when she reaches the door she’s been looking for. Room 53. With a shaky hand, Lena knocks on the wooden door and exhales deeply before slowly pushing it open.

The room is as bland as the hallway, all white with a few hideous abstract paintings hanging on the walls. It’s small, but it appears to have everything a person could need. A lone chair is placed in the middle of the room, with its back to the door. Dark, greying hair is the first thing Lena sees of her. Her mother. Carefully, Lena approaches the chair and walks around to finally face her. She’s met with green eyes, much like hers, but they’re vacant and far away. Lena takes a deep shaky breath.

“Mom?” Lena tries softly. Alodie’s eyes shoot up, meeting Lena’s unsure gaze.

“It’s me. It’s Lena.” Lena adds quietly.

Something sparks inside the woman’s eyes, but it dims as quickly as it appeared.

“Can you play some music, love?” Alodie requests, nodding towards the record player on the table, her Irish accent warms her up inside. The vague familiarity makes Lena’s heart ache.

“Of course.” Lena replies quietly, approaching the stack of vinyls next to it.

She looks through the records, softly smiling when she recognizes albums from Irish artists. No Need To Argue by The Cranberries, what a classic.

Lena puts the record on the platter and adjusts the tonearm before gently lowering it. When the first song off the album softly starts playing, Lena turns towards her mother again. Her heart soars at the sight of the small smile that plays on the woman’s lips.

Alodie hums appreciatively and watches the record spin.

Lena really looks at her for the first time and tries to memorize her features. Her hair is curly, dark, but with grey roots. Her jaw is sharp, but still soft, and friendly wrinkles decorate her face. When Lena thinks back to her childhood, the short careless years she’s spent with her mother, she only remembers a faceless woman with curls, and a flowery dress, a beach, and waves, and…

Lena stops her trail of thought and holds her breath as she listens to the song’s lyrics.

Unhappiness, where's when I was young

And we didn't give a damn

'Cause we were raised

To see life as fun and take it if we can

My mother, my mother she'd hold me

Did she hold me, when I was out there

It painfully twists her insides like a dagger. Of course the first song on the record is ‘Ode To My Family’.

Her throat tightens painfully and her eyes start to well up. There are so many questions Lena would like to ask, she absolutely needs to ask. Though, she doesn’t have a clue where to start. She’s about to open her mouth when the door suddenly opens. A young man enters the room, holding a steaming teacup and a plate with a sandwich. His expression changes to one of surprise when he notices Lena.

Lena quickly recomposes herself.

“Do you have a visitor, Alodie? Who’s this?” The nurse asks conversationally, putting the plate and the teacup on the table in front of Alodie.

She doesn’t reply, Alodie’s eyes don’t stray away from Lena’s face.

Lena suddenly remembers her manners and holds out her hand towards the young man.

“I’m Lena. I’m just visiting.” Lena answers. She realizes how useless it is to clarify she’s visiting when she’s clearly sporting a large V on her chest.

The man, Adam, bless the heavens for all those nametags, shakes her hand and shoots her a kind smile. He appears to be younger than her, possibly fresh out of high school.

“Nice to meet you, Lena. My name’s Adam. Are you two related?” He asks curiously.

Lena remains quiet, looking back at Alodie instead with heaviness in her heart.

“My apologies if I overstep. I’ve seen a picture of Miss Byrne when she was younger and I swear, the resemblance is remarkable.” He grins before grabbing the plate and handing it over Alodie. She takes the sandwich and Adam puts the now empty plate back on the table.

“A picture?” Lena asks breathlessly, watching as her mother takes a small bite.

“Oh, yes, over here.” Adam leads her to the nightstand next to Alodie’s bed. Lena follows him and curiously looks at the framed photo. The photo is clearly taken at a graduation party. A young Alodie is proudly holding onto her certificate in front of a large building, presumably somewhere in Ireland. Her smile is radiant and her dark curls prettily frame her face. Her eyes, her nose, god, even her eyebrows… Even Lena can’t deny the striking resemblance.

“It’s nice of you to visit her. She hasn’t had a visitor in years, you see… Actually, now that I think about it, I’ve never seen anyone visiting her during the four years I work here.” Adam realizes with a sad smile. “She doesn’t remember much of her life. They’ve tried, you know, to make her remember again. Music therapy, light therapy… But no success.” Adam sighs, still looking at the photograph.

Lena tries her best to keep her emotions in check, but she can’t stop her bottom lip from trembling and her throat from tightening again. Her mind is racing rapidly and her eyes stay glued to the picture of the happy woman. An idea starts forming.

“I have to go.” Lena forces out. Adam looks at her with surprise. Lena clears her throat and walks back to her motionless mother again. Gently, she takes her hand and strokes her thumb across the back.

“Will you- will you come back?” Adam asks confusedly.

“Yes.” Lena whispers, a sad smile gracing her lips as she looks into her mother’s eyes. She tries to send her a reassuring message with hers, to somehow let her know that she’s no longer alone.

Lena lets the tears run freely on her drive back, she breathes heavily and holds her steering wheel in a death grip. She drives as quickly as the roads allow her and before she knows it, though it felt like a century, she finally pulls into a vacant parking spot at her destination. The building looms over her and Lena tries her best to ignore the giant CATCO letters on the side, and the thought that Kara’s most probably typing away on that floor somewhere. She pushes her thoughts aside and enters the elevator. Inside the tight space, Lena watches her reflection in the window and quickly wipes away the traces of her tearful car ride. The doors finally open to reveal Obsidian’s ivory white floor. Heads turn and eyes observe her with shock. She almost spots the woman she’s looking for immediately.

“Lena?” Kelly walks over, holding a clipboard to her chest.

“Kelly, I was hoping we could talk.” Lena tells her, ignoring the various curious eyes on her.

“Of course.”

“Privately.” Lena clarifies, pointedly looking around to send death glares to the people observing her.

“Right, let’s go to my office.” Kelly suggests nervously and leads her to a smaller room at the end of the hallway.

“Are you alright?” Kelly asks when she closes the door behind them. “I-, no that’s a stupid thing to ask. Of course you’re not. How- how are you doing, Lena?”

Lena’s quiet for a moment. Through the window in the door of Kelly’s office she spots a curious employee, looking away quickly when they meet Lena’s gaze. She sighs. She realizes it’s been all over the news, that she, Lena Luthor, killed her own brother. Her own flesh and blood, evil or not. How is she doing? She’s not sure how to even answer that question.

“I wanted to ask you about the dementia trials, how are they coming along?” Lena says instead, focussing on keeping a good amount of distance between Kelly and herself.

Kelly looks a bit perplexed but recollects herself quickly.

“Oh! We’re currently testing the first prototypes, which are nowhere near market-ready yet, but the first results have been promising.” Kelly glances down at her clipboard and hands it to Lena.

Lena studies the numbers and x-ray photos, her eyes quickly scanning the information.

“You know, Lena. We’re all worried about you. I know you asked for space, but frankly, it’s not healthy. It’s okay to let yourself grieve. Talking about your loss really helps. It’s okay to let yourself feel.” Kelly pauses, trying to meet Lena’s eyes, but she doesn’t look up from the files on the clipboard. Kelly sighs sadly. “You know, Kara’s been dying to reach out to you. I think-.”

“You’re not my psychologist.” Lena cuts her off, shoving the results back in the woman’s arms.

“No, I’m not. But I’d like to think we’re friends.” Kelly sighs. Lena finally meets her eyes and sees nothing but sincerity in them.

Lena clenches her jaw and averts her gaze.

“Could you send one of the prototypes to L-Corp? I’d like to get a closer look, see if I could help tweak it a little. And could you send me an email with the latest results? Andrea wouldn’t mind.” Lena asks, not leaving much room for a negative answer.

Kelly sighs, but nods.

“Lena, please think about what I said-.” Kelly tries, but Lena’s already out of the door. Kelly sighs defeatedly.

Lena punches the button of the elevator and enters without sparing the other people in the tiny space a single glance. She’s tired of those judgemental looks. Though, Lena can already feel someone’s gaze on her. Lena exhales deeply and watches the doors close.

The set of eyes keep drilling in the side of her head and Lena decides she’s had enough. She turns her head, more than ready to send off another death glare, when she’s met with two very familiar blue eyes. Oh. Kara offers her a small hesitant smile and Lena has to stop her lips from doing the same. She settles on a stoic nod instead and averts her eyes with an ache in her chest. She feels stupid. She’s supposed to be smart, hell, she’s supposed to be a goddamn genius, but still, she let a pair of glasses and a pretty face fool her for years.

She ignores the bright blonde’s presence entirely the remainder of the hellish long elevator ride.

Finally, the elevator chimes and the doors slide open. Lena exits quickly, approaching her parking spot for a quick getaway.

“Lena?” Kara calls after her, Lena can hear her footsteps approaching rapidly. She briefly wonders if she’s using her superspeed to catch up with her. She grimaces at the thought.

Lena ignores her and unlocks her car with the press of a button.

“Lena? Can we talk?” Kara is, of course, suddenly standing right beside her.

“I have to go. I have work to do.” Lena tells her without looking at her, opening her car door.

“Lena, please. Are you okay? Is there anything I can do?” Kara asks her sincerely, sounding a bit defeated.

“No.” It’s the only thing Lena says before slamming her door shut and driving off. No, she’s not okay and no, there isn’t anything Kara can do to make that better. Not anymore.

She ignores Kara’s texts, in fact, she hasn’t even glanced at her phone all evening. The buzzing doesn’t distract her from the revealing reports on her screen. Kelly indeed sent her an email, not without mentioning that she could always talk to her if she needed to and that she’s not alone. Lena huffs at the message and focuses on the enclosed forms instead. Before she knows it, it’s nearing midnight again and her eyes are growing heavy. She studies a couple more x-rays when her body finally gives in to its desire to rest.

She locks herself in her private lab at L-Corp, studying the prototype closely. Lena connects it to her highly advanced computer and starts scanning the software and coding. Lena closes her eyes and takes a small DNA sample from her own finger. The drop of blood falls on top of a small platter, which is connected to her computer. Lena closes her eyes and focusses on her mother, her features, her proud smile in that old photograph. Her fingers start typing away, filling gaps in the code and adding new, more complex, elements. It takes a minute to upload. Lena gently grabs the contact lenses and places them on her eyes. She inhales deeply and lets the prototype activate.

She’s suddenly standing in a field on a sunny afternoon. The sunrays almost feel warm against her skin. It feels real, but not quite. Lena quietly watches the scene in front of her.

“Not so fast, Lena! I’m going to get you!” A younger Alodie with a flowery dress jokingly exclaims as she runs after a small child. She eventually grabs her and spins her around. Both her mother and her younger version laugh happily. A tear escapes Lena’s eye and rolls down her cheek.

It’s not even real, she knows that. This might as well not even be a real memory, just a glimpse of a moment she may have made up. Nonetheless, Lena’s heart aches at the loving display in front of her. The carelessness, the clear joy on their features. Lena feels a longing she’s long ago buried.

“I’m going to make you better, mother.” Lena promises shakily.

She watches them for a little longer and then closes her eyes.

“End simulation.”

Lena only shows up in her office when she has a meeting she absolutely cannot cancel. Even if it takes only thirty minutes of her time, it feels like a complete waste. She’s close to another breakthrough and she knows it.

She politely greets the older man and discusses some upcoming investments that would most definitely be beneficial for L-Corp. But she can’t really bring herself to care much. Thankfully, handling herself in meetings has become like second nature to her, so even with half her brain switched off, she manages to end it successfully. The board will be pleased.

Lena watches the man leave her office. She’s about to stand up and return to her lab when somebody knocks on the door. Lena’s head shoots up and she locks eyes with Kara, who’s hesitantly standing in the door opening with a large brown bag from Big Belly Burger. Lena sighs and watches as Kara slowly walks into her office.

“Hi.” Kara says nervously, fiddling with her glasses.

“Look, Kara, I’m really busy.” Lena tries, standing up and gathering the files she signed during the meeting.

“I know you are. And I know you keep forgetting to eat.” Kara holds up the bag with a small smile.

Lena wants to decline, but she can’t ignore the slight dizziness she feels from the lack of food in her stomach.

“Fine.” Lena sighs, making her way over to the couch. Kara beams as she places the bag on the table in front of her.

The silence lays heavy between them. Lena opens the wrapping to reveal a tasty burger, her stomach is almost screaming for it.

Kara joins her on the couch and Lena feels a strange urge to reach out and touch her. God, does she miss their hugs. But she can’t give in. Kara’s broken her trust, she’s broken her heart. Even now, after everything, Kara still doesn’t trust her enough to tell her the truth. Everything feels fake, like an act. As if Lena’s watching world’s longest Broadway show ever performed. Every single gesture, every smile, every hug, did it all mean nothing? Was their entire friendship just a way for Kara, Supergirl, to keep an eye on the new evil Luthor in town? 

“What are you thinking about?” Kara breaks the silence and Lena realises she must’ve been observing her the entire time.

Lena lowers her burger and lets out a humourless laugh. She can’t take the pretence anymore. She’s sick and tired of it.

“You were never going to tell me, were you?” Lena asks tiredly. Kara frowns in confusion.

“What do you mean?”

Lena’s laugh is void of emotion, she shakes her head in disbelief.

“You know, I thought you were the kindest and most selfless person I’d ever met, when I first got to know you.” Lena begins, her expression growing sour. “I was a fool. I should’ve known better.”

Kara’s smile vanishes immediately. She opens her mouth only to close it again.

“You never really trusted me, did you? You were waiting for me to snap and finally become the villain I’m meant to be.” Lena huffs.

“What? What are you talking about? Of course I trust you.” Kara tries, looking at her with wide eyes.

“Just- drop the act, Kara. I’m tired.” Lena stoically replies, keeping her voice as steady as she can. She gets up to pour herself a glass of whiskey, turning her back towards her former friend.

“Lena?” Kara tries softly, but Lena doesn’t turn around.

“Why don’t you fly off somewhere?” Lena mumbles and quickly downs her drink.

Behind her, Kara freezes up completely, but Lena doesn’t see that. Though, she can sense the change in the room.

“You know?” Kara’s voice sounds small.

Lena doesn’t reply, she just pours herself another glass.

“How did- I really wanted to tell you, Lena. It’s just- it’s too dangerous.”

Lena grimaces against her glass. She turns around with fire in her eyes.

“Lex told me, right before I put a bullet in his chest.” Lena says sharply, taking a quick sip. “Everyone knew, but me. Am I right?” Lena chuckles humourlessly. “Alex, obviously, James, Winn, Brainy, Nia, Kelly…”

“Kelly doesn’t know.” Kara whispers sadly.

Lena arches an eyebrow and harshly puts her glass down on the table.

“They’ve all been lying to me. I trusted them, I trusted you!” Lena exclaims, hating how her voice cracks a little.

“I-I didn’t want to lie to you. I really didn’t, I hated it! But it was for your own safety. I- I am so sorry, Lena. I never meant to hurt you.” Kara’s eyes are watering.

“I need you to leave. Right now.” Lena says harshly and Kara visibly flinches at her words.

“I’m sorry.” Kara whispers sadly and takes her leave.

Lena desperately tries not to think about Kara. She clears her head as much as she can and steps inside of the cold large building where her mother lives. Corrie wordlessly hands her the badge when she arrives and fills in her name for her. Lena nods her thanks and makes her way through the hallway. She enters her mother’s room with her hand in her coat’s pocket, her fingers tracing the prototype she brought with her.

“Hey mom.” Lena says softly as she approaches her, again sitting the chair in the middle of the room.

The woman briefly meets her eyes, looking up at her curiously.

“Music?” Lena suggests, motioning towards the stack of records.

Alodie’s smile in reply takes away a bit of Lena’s stress.

“Any preferences? Gilbert O’Sullivan, The Corrs, Sinéad O’Connor, Thin Lizzy…?” Lena raises her eyebrows and lets out a surprised chuckle. Alodie doesn’t reply, she keeps staring at her with an unreadable expression. Lena settles on The Corrs, for nostalgia’s sake and gently lowers the record player’s tonearm.

“It’s you again.” Alodie suddenly says.

Lena quickly turns her head to look at her. Alodie’s staring right at her.

“Yes, it’s me. It’s Lena.” Lena smiles and moves closer to her. Alodie smiles, but doesn’t say anything in return.

“There’s something I’d like to try. It- it might help you remember.” Lena explains softly, reaching for the prototype in her pocket. She holds it out in the palm of her hand and opens it to reveal the special contact lenses.

“It shouldn’t hurt, but please tell me if it does.” Lena whispers and reaches forward to place the lenses on her mother’s eyes. She takes a deep breath and then activates them. They turn grey and Alodie’s expression changes to one of complete wonder. Lena grabs her hand and holds it tightly and waits.

Suddenly, the door opens to reveal Adam with Alodie’s lunch.

“Oh! Hey, Lena. Good to see you again.” Adam smiles at her before placing the teacup and sandwich on the table. He turns around and frowns. “What- what are you doing?” He stares at Alodie’s now grey eyes in fear.

“Shhh, Adam, it’s okay. They’re virtual reality contact lenses, they might help her remember.” Lena explains, trying to ease his worries. Adam stares at Alodie’s eyes in awe.

“That’s- that’s incredible.” Adam whispers in awe.

“They’re only prototypes. But this is a great opportunity to see if I’m on the right path.” Lena adds with a soft smile.

“Are you a scientist?”

Lena realises that she might be revealing too much.

“Something like that.” She mumbles, staring at Alodie’s hand when it twitches a little bit.

“What’s she seeing right now?”

“A memory, at least I think it is.” Lena observes her mother closely.

“End simulation.” Lena says when she notices another violent twitch of the woman’s hand.

She quickly removes the lenses and puts them back in the Obsidian box she ‘borrowed’. Alodie stares at her with an awed expression.

“Lena.” Alodie says quietly, staring right into her eyes.

Lena smiles the brightest smile in weeks.

“Yes, it’s me. Mom, it’s me.” She can’t stop the tears that escape her eyes.

Alodie’s hand comes up and gently touches Lena’s cheek. Suddenly, her expression grows tired and her eyes flutter shut. Lena feels her hand slip away and watches as her mother falls asleep in her chair.

“She’s your mother?” Adam’s voice startles Lena a little, she’d almost forgotten about him.

“Yes.” Lena breathes, wiping her tears away and recollecting herself.

“Why didn’t you come s-.”

“I didn’t know.” Lena admits tiredly.

“Jesus.” Adam frowns.

“I’m legally not allowed to even tell you about this device. Don’t tell anyone, please?”

“Who would I tell?” Adam replies incredulously.

“I don’t know.” Lena shrugs.

“If this will help her… My lips are sealed, ma’am, scout’s honour.” Adam says earnestly.

“And how much is that worth?” Lena chuckles.

“Do not underestimate the honour of a scout.”

Obsidian’s first prototypes are a success, Lena can only assume, since she sees them almost everywhere she goes. Though, those particular prototypes are used for entertainment and not for breakthroughs in the medical field quite yet.

However, not everyone supports this drastic change in the city. People are walking around with eerie grey eyes, bumping into each other constantly, because they’re no longer focussed on the world around them. It irritates Lena as well, she has to admit.

Right after she steps into her office, the phone on her desk demands her attention. Lena sighs, but walks over to check who’s calling. She huffs but accepts the call, settling in her comfortable chair.

“Andrea, always a pleasure.” Lena greets her sarcastically.

“I heard you’ve been tweaking with my product. Why the sudden interest?” Andrea says, straight to the point.

“Thought it would be an interesting side project. I can see the potential, Andrea.”

“I know you longer than today, Lena. I’m sure you have your reasons and I know you’re more than qualified. However, I expect you to share any progress with Kelly Olsen. She’s leading the dementia and ptsd trials.”

“Sure thing, boss.” Lena remarks.

“If you weren’t my friend I’d have sued you immediately, Lena.”

“I wouldn’t have expected anything less.” Lena laughs.

Kara- Supergirl makes a statement on tv that evening, warning the citizens of National City about the dangers of Obsidian’s lenses. Lena almost changes the channel immediately, but she’s intrigued by her message. Lena eats a bit of the soup she’s cradling and listens to her speech.

“It can be addictive to live in a perfect place where nothing hurts, but that’s not reality. Let’s not forget the world around us. Let’s not forget what living really means.”

It doesn’t come as a surprise to Lena, that this invention has gotten somewhat out of hand. She doesn’t understand why anyone would need this type of VR in their daily lives in the first place, though, she does understand that it’s a goldmine, and money makes the world go ‘round, doesn’t it? So yes, Andrea is a business woman and she should’ve anticipated the dangers of her product, but Obsidian isn’t all evil like Supergirl is making it out to be.

Supergirl looks tired but determined to get the message across. And Lena knows that some people will probably listen to her, though she doubts it’s really enough to get them to stop. Lena sighs and turns off her television. She stands up and is about to put her empty bowl in her dishwasher when she suddenly hears a familiar sound on her balcony. A sound she hasn’t heard in a while. Lena puts her bowl away and closes the dishwasher before turning to face the superhero with her arms crossed.

“Are you trespassing now?” Lena arches an eyebrow in disbelief.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t know how else to reach you. You haven’t been answering any of my texts.” Supergirl says quietly.

“What do you want?” Lena asks tiredly, moving passed the superhero to settle back onto her couch again.

“I- it’s Obsidian, I’m worried, Lena, I believe the VR lenses might be dangerous.”

“I’ve seen your speech, Supergirl.” Lena remarks sharply.

“Right, yes, then you know why we have to stop it!” Kara says determinedly.

“We? And what do you suggest we do about it, Supergirl? I think you’re talking to the wrong person here, perhaps you should pay Andrea Rojas a visit.” Lena huffs.

Supergirl doesn’t look as confident as she did on tv earlier, she looks much more like Kara Danvers than her indestructible alter ego. She fiddles with her fingers a little and tries to meet Lena’s gaze.

“That’s the thing, I think she might be plotting something, Lena. We- the D.E.O. found files in Obsidian’s database that suggest-.”

“You’re joking, right?” Lena says incredulously, staring at the blonde in disbelief. Kara falters a little under her glare.

“I-I know she’s your friend, I’m sorry. I just thought that maybe you could get through to her and-.”

“You’ve got some nerve, Supergirl.” Lena interrupts her. “Look, I know you’re always out for a potential bad guy, that’s what you Supers do. But not everything has to be evil or villainous. I know it’s hard for you to grasp, but reality isn’t black and white, Supergirl.”

Supergirl is quiet for a moment, staring at Lena with wide eyes.

“The files-.” Supergirl cuts herself off when she sees Lena’s icy glare. “Just- just be careful, please?” Kara pleads, but doesn’t get a reply. She’s out of Lena’s penthouse almost as quickly as she came.

Lena spends all night scrolling through her father’s entries, making sure she isn’t missing anything vital. She needs more memories, real ones this time. And they have to be powerful. If only her father had left her some kind of diary. The only person who really kept one was…Lex. The memory of Supergirl handing her Lex’s diaries flashes through her mind. Oh.

Lena gets up from the couch and approaches the box on the bottom shelf of her bookcase. There’s diaries from every year since Lex turned seven years old. She grabs a few of the oldest ones and quickly turns a couple pages until she finds the passage about Lex’s dog. About the trip with Lionel and an unknown woman. Lex writes about her in detail, what they did, what they talked about, even what kind of Irish song her mother sang to him when she put him to bed. Lena can almost see it and she realises that must be enough.

The next morning she arrives at L-Corp around the same time as the janitors, which makes them look at her curiously. Lena sends them a glare as she steps into the elevator leading to her private lab. She inhales deeply when she’s finally alone again. She goes to work almost immediately, writing codes and sequences as fast as her fingers allow. She finishes around noon and stares at her screen proudly. She uploads it to the device and carefully puts the tiny box into her pocket again.

Adam is already there when she arrives in her mother’s room. He’s occupying a chair right in front of the woman.

“Lena!” Adam exclaims excitedly at the sight of her.

“Lena.” Alodie repeats, and turns her head to greet her with a smile.

Lena is quiet, admiring the clear improvement in awe.

“Hey mom. How are you feeling today?” Lena asks conversationally, but her heart is much less calm.

Alodie doesn’t reply with words, but she smiles widely.

“She’s really improved, your VR things really helped.” Adam smiles.

Lena approaches the two, she briefly glances at the stack of records. A silent question hangs in the air.

“Sinéad O’Connor.” Alodie says as clear as day and Lena grins.

“What?” Adam frowns in confusion.

“That’s before your time.” Lena chuckles as she grabs the right record and places it on the platter.

When the music fills the room, Alodie’s eyes begin to sparkle.

“Did you bring another memory?” Adam wonders.

Lena nods and reveals the tiny box, carefully taking the contact lenses out.

“I’m going to put them in again.” Lena tells her mother softly and places the lenses on her eyes again. They turn grey and widen a little.

“Is this your memory?” Adam questions, studying Alodie with interest.

“No.” Lena tells him, but doesn’t take her eyes off her mother.

“How does that even work?”

“I got it from a diary. This particular part was very detailed, it wasn’t too hard to reconstruct.” Lena answers half-heartedly.

The room is quiet for a moment as Adam processes what Lena just said.

“You reconstructed a memory from words? Are you kidding? That’s incredible!” Adam exclaims in awe.

Lena shrugs as if it’s nothing, but her lips form a pleased smile.

“I just hope it’s enough. It’s not really her memory. And memories aren’t always accurate, besides, there are multiple sides to every memory. She might’ve experienced it differently than-.” Lena stops herself there, trying to ease the slight panic crawling up inside her chest.

She turns her head to see Adam patiently waiting for her to continue. He doesn’t look expectantly. As if he’s leaving it completely up to her whether or not she wants to finish her sentence. And Lena knows, god does she know, that she shouldn’t trust so easily. It doesn’t end well for her, it never does. But there’s something about Adam that makes her solid walls crumble down a little. He genuinely seems to care about her mother and he really seemed overjoyed by the idea of a possible treatment. If Lena were able to see auras, she’s sure Adam’s would be particularly bright. 

“My brother.” Lena eventually adds.

“Lex?” Adam inquires suddenly.

Lena freezes completely. Shit.

“Look, Lena, I do watch the news. You know, not everyone lives under a rock like Corrie from reception.” Adam chuckles, but Lena doesn’t relax in the slightest. Her mind is running a marathon, going over every terrible scenario she can think of. Their endings more deadly by the second.

Lena looks at him sharply, her jaw clenching.

“I don’t know how much money you want, but I’ll give it to you.” Lena offers with her well-known business mask on.

“What?” Adam looks genuinely confused.

“If the press finds out- if my step-mother does, I fear for Alodie’s safety. So, if it’s money you want, just tell me how much.” Lena says defeatedly but with determination. Just the idea of Lilian catching wind of it, it sends a sickening shiver down her spine. She knows what the woman is capable of and that hurting defenceless citizens isn’t beside her.

Adam stares at her dumbfounded.

“What? Why would I- No! I would never go to the press behind your back.”

“You’d be surprised how many people would. It’s good money.” Lena grimaces, her shoulders still tense.

“I would never! You have my word. You can trust me, Lena.” Adam tells her with wide eyes, sounding sincere.

“Trusting people isn’t really my thing.” Lena sighs, turning back to watch her mother again.

“I understand, but- you have my word. Scout’s honour, remember?”

Lena rolls her eyes, but can’t help but feel relieved.

Lena isn’t blind. She knows she’s being watched, followed even. She’s seen the flashes of red and blue too often for it to be a coincidence. It not only annoys her, it deeply frustrates her. It means she can’t just jump into her car and visit her mother anymore. Not without a certain superhero and potentially the entirety of the D.E.O. finding out what she’s been up to. And it wouldn’t be that bad, if a third world war hadn’t broken loose surrounding Obsidian and their VR prototypes. Everyone is asked to return their contact lenses immediately, even risking a fine if they don’t. And, sure, Lena has seen Kelly’s e-mails popping up, asking her to send her borrowed prototype back as soon as possible. But Lena decides she suddenly lost the ability to read and closes the application. She hasn’t signed any official forms, so technically there’s no proof she indeed possesses one of the prototypes. And Andrea surely has enough on her mind as it is.

Lena sighs and opens a different app instead to shoot her newfound ally a message. She smiles when she sees his updates on her mother’s improvement. She’s glad they decided to exchange phone numbers.

Adam 6:33 PM

She’s singing an Irish song now! Wish I could tell you the lyrics, but 🤷

Lena 7:55 PM

That sounds promising. Thank you for your updates, Adam.

Lena sighs deeply and brings her fingers to her phone’s screen again.

Lena 7:56 PM

Look Adam, we need to be very careful. I’m sure you’ve seen the news. All prototypes are being called back, including the one I borrowed. They’ve been used with questionable intentions, but you and I both know they can be used for good.  

I’d understand if you don’t want to be involved in this. I know you declined, but my offer still stands.

Adam 7:58 PM

Not a chance. I’ve seen how much the lenses help your mother. I’m in. When she makes a recovery, they’ll finally see the potential too.

Lena 8:01 PM

I was hoping you’d say that. Sadly I can’t visit my mother any time soon. I believe I’m being watched. We’ll have to be more creative.

Adam 8:03 PM

You’re being watched?!? By who? The cops? If they know you have one of the prototypes can’t they just stop you?

Lena 8:04 PM

That’s the thing, I never officially signed anything. Barely a handful of people know I have it. Nothing will lead them to me.

Adam 8:05 PM

You mean you stole it?

Lena 8:05 PM

Is it really stealing if I kindly asked an employee to send it to me without any questions asked? Either way, that’s beside the point. I’m certain I’m being watched. I’m going to propose something, but feel free to decline.

Adam 8:06 PM

I’m listening 👂

Lena 8:08 PM

Right, I’m still going to work on the prototype in my lab, that won’t change, but I won’t be able to test it out personally. I propose we meet somewhere in the middle around twice a week. I will hand you the lenses so we can carry on with the treatment.

Adam 8:10 PM

You’re really trusting me with this?

Lena 8:10 PM

I don’t trust anyone, Adam.

Adam 8:11 PM

This sounds an awful lot like trust. Your secret’s safe with me, Miss Luthor. 🤫

Lena rolls her eyes at Adam’s reply. She still doesn’t understand emoticons, or whatever they’re called. They remind her of the way Kara used to text her, sometimes the emojis would outnumber the actual words. The memory triggers a painful pang in her chest. She pushes the memory aside and focusses on another incoming message.

Adam 8:13 PM

Why the intense secrecy tho? Do you really think the cops will follow you wherever you go?

Lena 8:14 PM

It’s not really cops I worry about. It’s our local vigilante.

Adam 8:14 PM

????? Are you saying you’re being watched by Supergirl? Oh my god.

Lena 8:15 PM

Yes. I’m sure you’re aware of her abilities, including enhanced hearing and x-ray vision. Which means we have to be really careful. Discussing the device in public would be very risky.

Adam 8:16 PM

But would it really be that bad if she found out? From what I’ve seen she’s a pretty understanding person. I’m sure she’d understand if you explain your intentions.

Lena 8:18 PM

She thinks I’m a villain, I don’t see that changing any time soon. Besides, I don’t trust her.

Adam 8:18 PM

You don’t trust Supergirl? Isn’t she the beacon of hope?

Lena 8:20 PM

Let’s just say we don’t see eye to eye.

Lena’s running out of memories. But she realizes they don’t necessarily have to be real, as long as they spark that same sense of recognition. So she goes to work to create memories of moments that surely must’ve happened almost daily, accurate or not. Moments like eating together at the breakfast table, hugging each other, watching television together in the evening… Lena doesn’t remember those moments, but that doesn’t mean they didn’t happen. It sparks a dangerous longing inside her chest.

It’s without a doubt much more difficult to reconstruct. It takes a lot more patience and care than the previous memories. After working in her lab for four hours straight, Lena takes the elevator up to check if she’s needed and to grab herself a cup of coffee.

However, when the doors slide open to reveal the right floor, she’s met with Kara animatedly talking to her assistant. Kara stops mid-sentence when she notices her. Lena sighs deeply and walks straight to her office.

“Lena, wait!”

Kara follows her inside and closes the door behind her.

“What? Are you here to stop my villainous masterplan, Supergirl?” Lena scoffs and turns to look at her with her arms crossed.

Kara looks like a kicked puppy, it’s almost heart-breaking to see.

“I know you still have one of the prototypes. I just don’t understand why. They’re dangerous, Lena, they can mess with your head.” Kara sounds like she’s pleading.

“Perhaps if they’re used incorrectly. They were never meant to be used for leisure, for people who are too lazy to go to the gym or take a walk to the park.” Lena answers sharply. “I’m sure you think I’m out for world domination or something along that line, but I can assure you I am not.”

“I never thought that.” Kara says truthfully, stepping closer with determination in her eyes. “Kelly told me you were interested in the dementia trials specifically. I don’t know what you’re doing, but I know your intentions are good.”

Lena’s quiet for a moment, a little bit annoyed that Kelly told her, but it doesn’t really come as a surprise.

“Oh, do you? And how do you know what my intentions are?” Lena arches an eyebrow.

“I don’t. But I know you.” Kara answers so sincerely, Lena’s heart skips a beat. Feeling betrayed by her own body, Lena slips an unimpressed mask on instead, one she often uses during business meetings.

“Do you think so? Do you really know me, Supergirl?” The mocking tone in Lena’s voice makes Kara flinch.

“I’m- I’m still the Kara you know.”

“But you just happen to have an alter ego?” Lena agues with a humourless chuckle.

“I- I should’ve told you so long ago. I know that. I just- When people know, they become a target. And you’ve already been through so much, I- I convinced myself I was protecting you, but every time I kept my secret from you I- I wasn’t protecting you I was hurting you, I realize that now. And I am so so sorry.” Kara’s sobbing, her voice breaks at the end.

Lena is quiet for a moment as she lets the words sink in. The urge to reach over and pull her in a hug is almost becoming unbearable, but she stiffly keeps her arms to her sides.

“Trust is a fragile thing, Kara. When it breaks, it’s not easily mended.” Lena’s voice is hoarse.

Kara nods wordlessly and wipes her tears away.

“Y-you hurt me so much.” Lena sobs, she can feel herself starting to shake.

Suddenly, all she can feel is the warmth of Kara’s arms as they wrap around her. Lena hates herself for it, but she sinks into the comfortable feeling and sobs against the indestructible girl’s neck. It feels so familiar and right, the voice in the back of Lena’s head that tells her to push her away immediately, grows quieter by the second. Lena shoves all rational thoughts aside, she’s absolutely exhausted and, honestly, touch starved. She’s going to let herself have this moment. That surely won’t hurt anybody, right?

They stand there for a moment, in the middle of Lena’s office. Lena keeps her eyes firmly shut, afraid that opening them would mean facing reality. Which is kind of a funny thought in the midst of the never-ending VR discussions surrounding the city. She vaguely registers Kara momentarily tensing up and moving to retract her arms. The pang of disappointment stings in Lena’s chest.

“Oh! I’m sorry, am I interrupting?” It’s Kelly, suddenly materializing in the door opening. The woman sends a small wave Kara’s way.

Lena quickly clears her throat and straightens her shoulders.

“Not at all. What can I do for you?” Just like that, Lena’s back in CEO mode.

“I- I should probably go. Bye!” Kara hastily says and shoots off, almost inhumanly fast. But surely she wouldn’t use her superspeed in front of Kelly.

“Right, it’s about the prototype. And yes, I know you’ve been ignoring all my emails.” Kelly looks at Lena pointedly.

Lena is about to explain herself when Kelly continues.

“And I get it, I see the potential too. Some patients have made incredible progress all thanks to this new treatment. It’s absolutely ground-breaking. But the board doesn’t care about that. All they care about is the public’s opinion and their money.” Kelly scoffs with determination in her eyes and Lena looks at her in surprise. She doesn’t know what she expected from this conversation, but this surely wasn’t it.

“Are you saying I can keep it?” Lena asks curiously.

“I’m saying I want us to work together on this. I know Andrea asked you to share your progress with me, which you of course didn’t do, but I think we’d make a pretty good team. What do you say?”

Lena’s actually speechless.

“I don’t usually work with a lab partner.” Lena utters, which is only partly a lie. She does usually prefer to work alone, especially when it’s a project this close to her heart.

“I won’t tell anyone. You can trust me.” There are those words again, ‘you can trust me’. Do those words still hold any meaning? Or do people just throw those words around just to get what they want? Lena isn’t so sure anymore.

“I won’t even tell Alex.” Kelly adds sincerely.

Lena sighs tiredly.

“Fine.”

“Really?” Kelly smiles widely.

“You’re excellent at what you do. I’d be a fool to say no.” And for some reason she feels like she can trust her. And maybe that has something to do with the fact she doesn’t seem to know that Kara is Supergirl. Which essentially makes Kelly the only person who didn’t lie to her face.

She doesn’t tell Kelly everything, of course. She tells her just enough to have something to work with. Their joint effort proves to be incredibly invaluable. Soon enough, all of Lena’s remaining doubts slip away.

“So you’re talking to Kara again?” Kelly breaks the silence in Lena’s lab.

“Not really.” Lena mumbles as her fingers type away rapidly.

“You’re just hugging then?” Kelly says jokingly.

Lena doesn’t answer, instead she studies her notes closely as if she only just discovered them.

“Look, Lena, I don’t know what happened between you two, but you obviously care about each other. Why are you doing this to yourself?”

“She broke my trust.” Lena offers tiredly.

“Did she cheat on you or something?”

Lena freezes in her movements.

“Did she?” Kelly asks curiously.

“No, no. We were just friends, best friends.” Lena quickly clarifies.

Kelly quietly studies her for a moment.

“It’s none of my business, but this kind of sounds like a break-up.”

Lena clears her throat and tries not to be affected.

“I’d appreciate it if we focussed on the research instead.” Lena tries so hard to sound like she’s in a board meeting, but her voice lacks the usual sharpness.

“Lena, the world is not going end if you admit you have feelings. It’s okay. I’ve seen how devastated Kara’s been ever since you two started fighting. The amount of times Alex had to cancel our dates, because Kara wouldn’t stop crying. Kara’s struggling just as much.” Kelly sighs mournfully.

“I don’t want to hear it.” But she really does. “I need a break.” Lena promptly stands up and heads towards the elevator.

The lunchroom is awfully crowded when Lena arrives. Though, she spots Adam almost immediately, he excitedly waves her over to his booth.

“Lena! Good to see you.” Adam smiles.

Lena offers him a smile as she settles down.

“Did you bring it?” Adam asked in a low voice, suddenly his expression changes drastically. “Oh shoot! That totally sounded like I’m here to buy drugs from you or something. Do you- do you think Supergirl is listening to us right now?”

Lena actually snorts at that, his expression is absolutely priceless.

“I wouldn’t be surprised, really.”

“Isn’t that like a breach of privacy?” Adam wonders as he looks at the ceiling as if he’s expecting to spot Supergirl hanging down a lamp.

“You tell her that.” Lena huffs.

Adam watches with wonder as Lena places the tiny box on the table. Suddenly, Adam clears his throat and eyes the ceiling again.

“I’ve been dying to read this book, Lena. Thank you so much for bringing it to our book club meeting.” Adam emphasizes rather loudly.

Lena’s eyebrows shoot up as she stares at him in disbelief. Oh boi. When Adam finally meets her eyes again, Lena firmly shakes her head.

Instead of returning to her penthouse that afternoon, Lena takes a different road and parks her car near the edge of a nearby forest. It’s quiet and peaceful without all the loud city noises. It’s exactly what she needs. Though, she hasn’t really come there to clear her head. Lena casually leans against the side of her car and closes her eyes to enjoy the warm sunbeams on her face. Soon enough, she hears something shift in the air and the familiar sound of two boots hitting the ground. Lena slowly opens her eyes.

“A book club, really?” Supergirl scoffs.

“Eavesdropping is considered rude, Supergirl.” Lena deadpans.

“It’s not rude if you’re in potential danger.” Supergirl emphasizes.

“Oh? I didn’t think it’d be time for my quarterly assassination attempt already.”

“That’s not funny, Lena.” She sighs. “It’s Andrea. I know you don’t want to believe it, but she’s really planning something bad. I have a bad feeling about this.” Supergirl pauses for a moment before continuing. “Lena? Who was that guy at the lunchroom?”

“That’s none of your business.” Lena answers quickly.

Supergirl looks as if she’s not sure where to go from here.

“Do you know him well? What if he works for Andrea?”

“Adam doesn’t work for Andrea.”

Something flashes over Supergirl’s features that Lena hasn’t seen before.

“Adam?”

“That’s his name, yes.” Lena arches an eyebrow at Supergirl’s odd behaviour.

“Oh, okay.” Suddenly, the almighty superhero is at a loss for words.

Lena stares at her for a moment before deciding to change the subject.

“Why do you think Andrea is after me?”

Supergirl straightens her shoulders and goes back to business.

“She’s something planned for the prototypes, it’s possibly already done. She's behind bars now, but- The files we found mentioned some kind of deliberate glitch in the first batch.”

Lena stops breathing. A glitch?

“What kind of glitch?”

“We’re not sure, but it might be connected to the brain. It- it didn’t look good, Lena.”

Oh god no.

“And this glitch is in all of them?” Lena holds her breath.

“If it’s the same batch, possibly yes.” Supergirl tells her earnestly.

Lena puts the back of her hand against her forehead.

“Are we talking mind control?”

“Possibly.” Supergirl answers sorrowfully. She pauses before asking her next question.

“Lena, have you used the contact lenses too?”

“Yes, I have.” Lena whispers.

Supergirl doesn’t say anything, but she tenses up completely. Her fingers form a tight fist and she looks like she desperately wants to hit something.

“It was only a couple of times.” Lena adds, but that doesn’t do anything to ease Supergirl’s worries. Lena’s own worries are a whole different story.

Lena releases a shaky breath. All this time she thought she was helping her mother, she might’ve actually just made her an easy target to some deranged evil plan. Lena’s heart is hurting so much, she wouldn’t be surprised if it stopped beating altogether. She pushes herself off the side of her car and combs her fingers through her hair in frustration. Supergirl notices her distress and steps a little closer.

“Lena, you’re going to be okay. I’ll make sure of it. They’re already working on it at the D.E.O. and-.”

“It’s not me I’m worried about, Kara.” Lena tells her tightly. Supergirl’s head shoots up at the sudden mention of her name.

“You weren’t supposed to find out. Not about this. Not about something that finally gives me a sense of hope again. I can’t- because I- because I can’t trust you.” Lena sighs tiredly, noticing the way Supergirl’s face slightly falls. “But now- I don’t think I have much of a choice left.”

Supergirl remains quiet and watches as Lena inhales shakily to prepare herself for what she’s about to reveal.

“I found my biological mother.” Lena reveals and completely stuns the superhero in front of her.

“But-.”

“Turns out she didn’t actually die that day. My father- Lionel, took her to his lab rather than an actual hospital and when he realized he couldn’t help her, he shipped her off to some mental institution out of town. She- my mother, she doesn’t remember anything. She doesn’t remember me. But- the VR treatment is ground-breaking, Kara. She’s been improving so m-much.” Lena can’t stop the sobs from taking control of her body.

“Oh, Lena.” Supergirl whispers and puts a comforting, but hesitant, hand on her shoulder, rather than giving her one of her famous hugs.

Lena decides to throw caution to the wind and closes the distance, resting her face on Supergirl’s shoulder and allowing the super to wrap her arms around her shaking frame. When she closes her eyes, she can pretend that everything is alright. That Kara hasn’t lied to her for years and that they’re still best friends. Best friends who regularly take each other on completely platonic dates and totally don’t linger a little too long when they hug each other goodbye. There’s always been something between them and Lena’s sure Kara’s aware of that too. They’ve danced around that thin invisible line between friends and lovers for too long. And, frankly, Lena’s more than tired of it. And above all she’s sick and tired of her traitorous heart.

Lena pulls away to put some respectable distance between herself and her former best friend.

“Lilian can’t find out she’s still alive. We both know what she’s capable of.” Lena tells her when she’s got her voice back under control.

Supergirl nods firmly.

“Thanks for telling me. I’ll make sure she stays safe.” Supergirl reassures her.

Lena sends her watery smile and then frowns a little.

“Does Kelly know about the glitch?”

“Oh, definitely. Alex keeps warning her about it.” Supergirl chuckles lowly.

Lena looks confused.

“Let’s just say Kelly is even more stubborn than Alex is. She sees the potential too, she knows how important this kind of treatment is. Despite the warnings, she doesn’t want to let go of it.”

“Then why didn’t she say anything? Why didn’t she warn me?” Lena’s frown only deepens.

“She’s not allowed to give away that kind of information, hell, even I am not really allowed to say anything. And I think Kelly’s convinced she’ll find a way to somehow dismantle the glitch? Is that- Can you actually dismantle a glitch?” Supergirl wonders in confusion.

Lena succeeds in keeping her face mostly emotionless.

“All glitches are removable, sure. I just wish I knew about this sooner.” Lena replies exasperatedly.

“I did try to tell you, you know?” Supergirl offers.

“I know.” Lena sighs regretfully. “God, I have to call Adam.”

“Right.” Supergirl suddenly falters. “I’ll just-.”

“Please, stay?” Lena asks despite her better judgement. Supergirl nods and watches as Lena retrieves her phone from her pocket. Lena’s eyes widen when she notices the notifications on her screen. She clicks on the preview with a racing heart.

Adam 1:09 PM

That went kind of well didn’t it? Sorry about the book club thing, though it’s not completely my fault if Supergirl thinks you’re a nerd now. Cause let’s face it, you kind of already were one. 🤷

Adam 1:12 PM

I might be seeing things, but I’m sure a black car is following the bus I’m on.

Adam 1:20 PM

Okay I don’t want to alarm you but they’re still there. I can’t see their faces cause their windows are all dark.

Adam 1:33 PM

I’m definitely just being paranoid, right? I’m sorry for spamming you.

Adam 1:44 PM

Anyways, I’m almost there. I’ll let you know how it goes!

Adam 1:48 PM

SOS

Lena gasps and squeezes her phone in a death grip.

“What is it?” Supergirl asks alarmed.

“He’s in danger. I should’ve known- fuck!” Lena exclaims in anger.

“Hey, it’s going to be alright. Do you know where he was headed?” Supergirl’s back to business.

“St. Mary’s Mental Institution. Kara, please be-.” But Supergirl is already gone.

Careful.

Storming into the D.E.O. completely unannounced isn’t the brightest idea, because as soon as Lena steps foot inside the crowded hallway, multiple guns are pointed her way. Yes, perhaps she should’ve called.

“Take it easy! I’m here to help.” Lena holds her hands up and searches the crowd for a familiar face.

“Lena? Is that you? What the hell are you doing here?” Alex, sporting an impressive black outfit, comes storming her way through the crowd. She signals to the agents and soon enough they lower their guns, though they keep staring at Lena as if she’s holing a ticking timebomb.

“I didn’t know where else to go. K- Supergirl just flew right into danger and I hate not knowing what’s going on.” Lena explains, lowering her hands. “And I think I can help with the glitch.”

Alex gives her an exasperated look, but nods.

“Thank god, come with me.” Alex breathes and leads Lena through the busy building until they reach a smaller control room with impressively large computer screens. Winn is rapidly typing away while keeping his eyes on three screens at once.

“Lena! Welcome to the tech-cave.” Winn grins while his fingers keep moving impressively fast.

Lena arches an eyebrow at that and Alex just sighs.

“It’s not my idea.” Alex shoots her a look. “Winn will show you our progress. It’s good to have you back, Lena.” She shoots her a soft smile that doesn’t quite match with her D.E.O. attire. Alex is about to turn back, when Lena speaks up.

“What about Kara? Any updates?” She tries to keep her voice as steady as possible.

“They were already gone when she arrived. The boy is okay, but apparently one of the patients is missing.”

It hits her like a train.

Lena covers her face with the palms of her hands. God no.

“Lena?” Alex asks worriedly.

“She’s in danger, we have to act now!”

“The patient?” Alex arches an eyebrow.

“Yes!”

“How do you know it’s a woman?”

Lena’s quiet for a moment, sensing both Alex’s and Winn’s eyes on her. She closes her eyes and sighs deeply.

“My biological mother is a patient there. If Lilian is involved, which she most definitely is, I’m afraid she just found what she’s looking for.”

Lena opens her eyes to see stunned looks.

Lena’s usually not too bad at keeping her mind at a task. But the series of code on the screen in front of her are making her eyes dry out and the sudden migraine isn’t helping much either. She presses her fingers onto her forehead. She can’t stop thinking about what Lilian might be up to. Is her mother okay? Why is Kara taking so long?

A sharp sting shoots through her head that makes her groan. Fuck.

“Lena? Are you okay?” Winn asks, pausing his fingers above his keyboard.

“I’m fine. Any progress?” Lena drawls.

“Well, I’m kind of stuck here. Their security is air-tight, I’ve tried everything I can think of.” Winn sighs.

“Let me see.” Lena rolls her chair right next to Winn so she can look at his screen.

“Hold on, I recognize this sequence.” Lena springs in action, her fingers moving on their own on Winn’s keyboard. “It’s a pattern, you see? Of course…” Lena mumbles and frowns in concentration. Winn just stares at the rapidly appearing chain of numbers on his screen.

Lena’s eyes flicker across the string of numbers as she finally understands Andrea’s coding. She should’ve known really. When she ends the string and completes one of the advanced sequences, her migraine comes back at full force. She groans, again, and forcefully closes her eyes.

“Lena?” Winn looks at her with wide eyes.

“I’m-I’m fine. I’m taking a break. You’ve got the pattern, right?” Lena stands up a bit wobbly and returns her chair to the right desk.

Winn looks worried, but nods and returns to the task at hand.

Lena walks through the hallway and briefly wonders if they changed the lights while she was in Winn’s tech-cave. It’s bright, too bright. The space vaguely reminds Lena of a space ship. Lena almost trips, her legs a bit unsteady, but she catches herself on the wall. She opens the door to the bathroom and approaches the row of sinks. When she looks at herself in the mirror she realizes something is very off. Her eyes are no longer green, instead they’re eerily grey. It’s the last thing she sees before she passes out on the cold hard tiles.

She’s floating in space, calmly and contently. It feels like freedom. As if all heavy burdens are lifted off her shoulders. She doesn’t feel them anymore. In fact, she doesn’t feel anything except for the strange refreshing breeze against her face. Wait, isn’t this space?

“Lena.” It’s a name, it’s her name. But there’s nobody except for herself and the stars. One star in particular is so bright and pretty and big and- Oh.

“Lena, you have to stop this.” The flying person in front of her says. Space sure is weird.

She wants to reply, but she can’t find her mouth.

“Lena, please, come back to me.” The voice sounds angelic, but sad. Is this an angel? Why is the angel sad?

“Your mother is safe and the glitch has been dealt with. The only thing you have to do now is wake up! You need to end the simulation now.”

My mother? Glitch? Simulation?

The words don’t make sense to her at all. All she can do is stare at the pretty figure in front of her. She looks almost ethereal, the way she seems to float without any effort at all. The way her hair moves almost in slow-motion. But there’s something wrong. The angel is crying, no, she’s sobbing. The tears are streaming down her face and all Lena can do is watch. She desperately wants to move, to reach out and offer her some kind of comfort, but she can’t get her body to do what she demands. In fact, she doesn’t even feel her body.

She feels a sudden panic rising in her chest. What is happening? Where am I?

“Lena, I- I can’t lose you again. Please- please come back to me. I promise I’ll never lie to you again. I’ll do anything, just- please wake up?” The figure pleads, her voice breaking and the sobs threatening to take over again.

“I love you.” The angel whispers tearfully.

Something deep inside of Lena suddenly sparks alive. A feeling of warmth crawls up from her toes. When she opens her eyes, things are much clearer now. The symbol on the woman’s chest, the emotions in those crystal blue eyes. Kara.

“End simulation.” Lena whispers and falls back into the dark void.

The room is far too bright. Her eyelids refuse to expose her eyes to the excessive levels of artificial light.

“Lena?” A soft voice tries. Lena’s eyes finally flutter open and she takes in her surroundings. Her eyes land on the worried Kryptonian’s face immediately.  

“Kara.” Lena says hoarsely. She tries to sit up, but reconsiders when she realizes how sore her body feels. She gasps when she notices the sling on her arm.

“What- what happened?”

Kara looks pale, but she tries to send her a reassuring smile anyway.

“The glitch. The first wave activated just before Winn finished the sequences.” Kara explains regretfully.

Lena’s mind starts racing immediately.

“My mother, is she-.”

“She’s alright now, she’s safe. She was asking for you, actually.” Kara smiles softly.

Lena’s heart skips at her words. She can’t stop the smile that forms on her lips. But then she looks down at her arm again and frowns.

“What happened to my arm?” Lena wonders.

Kara sadly looks down before answering.

“The glitch took control over your body momentarily and you destroyed a couple of computers and- you kind of attacked Alex.”

Lena stares at her with wide eyes.

“I did what? My god. Is she alright?”

“She’s fine, J’onn was able to stop you once he realized what was happening.”

Lena breathes out in relief and sinks back into the pillow under her head.

Kara turns her head towards the closed door, probably using her x-ray vision to look through it. She turns back towards Lena with a soft smile on her face.

“There’s someone here who really wants to see you.”

Lena arches her eyebrows, but Kara doesn’t tell her anything else, instead she approaches the door to reveal a nervous looking Adam.

“Lena!” He barges into the room and approaches her with wide eyes. Kara silently slips through the door to leave them alone. Lena hates that she misses her instantly.

“Oh my god, I was so worried. Are you alright?” Adam worries.

“I feel fine. Are you okay? Did they hurt you?” Lena asks worriedly, quickly scanning him for any visible injuries, but she finds none.

“I’m okay! They used something on me to make it impossible for me to lie, I am so sorry. They took Alodie. But Supergirl was amazing!!! She flew off right after them and chased them until she got her to safety! And now that this glitch is gone, we can continue with the treatment!” Adam fills her in excitedly.

“Where is Alodie now?” Lena wonders.

“She’s right here! Just a bit further down the hall!”

Lena gasps and tries to sit up again, a bit uncomfortable but it’ll do.

“You probably shouldn’t move too much, Supergirl told me about your injuries.” Adam pauses before lowering his voice. “She really cares about you, Lena. Like a lot. I know you two don’t see ‘eye to eye’, but she was so worried about you. I’m pretty sure she would’ve stopped earth’s rotation if it meant it would save you. And, honestly, I think she actually could do that. How cool would that be?”

“That would be incredibly catastrophic. I don’t see how destroying the planet would save me.” Lena can’t help but grin at him.

“I mean, theoretically speaking, I could do that, but I really shouldn’t.” Kara appears in the door opening again with a soft smile.

“Wow!” Adam stares at her with wide eyes.

Lena chuckles at the expression on his face, but then her eyes find Kara’s smile and she can’t bring herself to look away.

“I’m- I’m going to tell Alodie you’re awake!” Adam leaves, but Lena barely notices that.

“I hope you never do anything destructive to save me.” Lena smirks at the approaching superhero.

“I mean, I’d do a lot of things to save you, but destroying earth might be a little bit extreme. Though, now that I think about it, I could always just take you to another planet-.” Kara’s smiles when she hears Lena’s loud laugh.

“Please, don’t destroy all of humanity for me, that’d look bad.” Lena laughs breathlessly before turning serious again. “Thank you for saving my mother. I don’t know what I’d do if-.” Lena shakes her head to force that thought away and inhales deeply. “Kara?”

“Yeah?” Kara looks up, their eyes locking instantly.

“Were you really in the- virtual world with me? Or did my mind make that all up?” Lena asks carefully.

Kara looks down, looking a bit nervous all of a sudden. She swallows tickly and returns her gaze again with determination in her eyes.

“It was real. It was me.” Kara tells her and Lena’s heart does something acrobatic.

“I meant it, what I said.” Kara pauses. “I- I know I hurt you. I wish I could go back in time and tell you sooner, but I can’t. You- Lena, you mean the world to me. I’d do anything to keep you out of harm’s way. And I should’ve realized how much I was hurting you with my secret. I’m so sorry.” Kara says earnestly, the sadness evident in her eyes,

Lena holds out her hand and waits for Kara to grab it. She gently strokes the skin with her thumb.

“I understand it now. You didn’t want me to get hurt. But I did get hurt. And I did what I always do when people hurt me, I built a wall around myself and shut everyone out. Makes it difficult to see things from other people’s point of view. But I see yours now and I’m sorry it took me so long.” Lena tells her sincerely and squeezes her hand.

Kara takes a shaky breath and gives her a tearful smile.

“And, for the record, I love you too.” Lena whispers.

Kara stares at her in disbelief.

“You do?” Kara asks softly.

Lena nods with an adoring look on her face.

“Thank Rao. I mean, it probably would’ve been a bit awkward if I had just said that out of the blue whi-.”

“Kara?” Lena interrupts. “Just kiss me.” She adds with a smirk.

Kara’s eyes widen momentarily, and then they lock onto Lena’s lips. She leans forward to capture them in a gentle kiss and Lena melts into it completely. Lena’s free hand moves up to cup Kara’s cheek and pull her even closer, though she knows she couldn’t possibly move a Kryptonian. Her lips are softer than she had imagined, and so gentle. At this rate, Lena’s sure her heart could compete at the upcoming Olympics. The worries of the world wash away for a little bit and all she can focus on is Kara’s gentle touch.

She eventually pulls away to catch her breath.

“Would you like to formally meet my mother?” Lena suggests happily.

“I’d love to.” Kara beams and gently helps Lena to her feet.