Chapter Text
Most people saw Sayaka as a clumsy know-it-all that only ever got good grades.
Most people saw Sayaka as President Kirari Momobami’s loyal secretary who never left her side.
No one ever saw Sayaka as she was on the inside.
Sayaka Igarashi was 17 years old. She attended Hyakkaou Academy, a private school for snobby rich kids who only ever saw fun in gambling. Sayaka never took part in such foolish antics. She believed gambling was a ludicrous waste of time and money. Because of this, many students refused to talk to her, but in all honesty, she didn’t mind. She believed that having friends would only be a distraction to her getting to the top of her class grade-wise. When she first enrolled at the academy, she saw her future as one where she wouldn’t get attached to anyone, she wouldn’t make any friends, no one would notice her, and she would only focus on her grades and getting to the top university in Japan.
Academic life was perfect for Sayaka. Unfortunately, not every part of her life was.
Every single day after school, she dreaded going home. Because at home, she wasn’t safe.
Her parents got divorced when Sayaka was only four years old, so she currently lived with her mother. Her mother suffered from depression and PTSD from her failed relationship, so often times, to cope with these hardships, she resorted to drinking.
Sayaka’s mother, when under the influence of alcohol, lost all control of her sanity. She would beat her daughter and throw things at her, including knives. Sayaka had knife wounds and bruises all over her body, which she covered up with makeup every morning before school so no one would ask questions. She occasionally missed some spots, which meant that some bruises were visible, but of course no one said anything. If no one wanted to talk to her, why would they even care?
The beatings started in middle school; they only happened every once in a while, but they became more and more frequent as her mother drank more and more. Sayaka feared for her life every single night. When she knew her mother was drinking, she’d lock herself in her closet and curl up in the corner, praying that she wouldn’t be found. This didn’t always work.
At school, Sayaka showed no sign that anything was wrong at home. That was one thing she was good at - pretending things were normal. She never cried at school, she never gave a single hint. It wasn’t very difficult, considering she had no friends. She believed that, as long as she didn’t get attached to anyone, her secret would be kept safe.
That all changed when she met Kirari.
Kirari Momobami, the Student Council President, was yet another gambling addict. The thrill of not knowing the outcome when facing an opponent excited her to her very core. When Sayaka first heard of Kirari, she didn’t think much of her. It’s just another student addicted to gambling, who happened to be the President of the Student Council.
One morning, Sayaka walked into her chemistry class, just as any other normal day. She put her materials on her desk and sat down, waiting for the teacher to arrive. Her arm started to itch, so she scratched, wincing at the pain of her cuts and bruises. It felt like it was on fire. She looked down and saw she accidentally reopened one of the knife cuts. The blood was slowly leaking down her arm and onto the tabletop.
Great. She didn’t want to go to the nurse’s office, for she knew they would just accuse her of self-harm. She went there once because her bruised arm started to hurt, and she left with a scolding to control herself from cutting. It was proof that no one actually cared. Not that she minded much, but it did hurt to think about.
She decided to grab some paper towels and take care of the situation herself. As she got up, blood dripped on the floor. She heard a few giggles from the back of the class. She ignored them, taking some paper towels and sitting back down.
“What’s the matter? Did you get a papercut from your book on how to be a know-it-all?” a girl sneered, and the entire classroom erupted in laughter. Sayaka looked down and did her best to ignore them. She was used to this; it was bad enough when people didn’t care about her. The teasing was only adding insult to injury.
She kept telling herself that she was only there to get good grades, but the way people treated her was becoming unbearable.
As the teasing continued, Sayaka felt like she was going to explode. She wanted to punch them, but she knew that she’d get in trouble and the bullies would be let off the hook. It’s happened before; no reason it shouldn’t happen again.
As she closed her eyes to regain her composure, the teasing suddenly stopped. Sayaka opened her eyes again to see what had made them change their behavior.
Standing in front of her was Kirari. Her hands were at her hips; her icy blue gaze was transfixed on the bullies. At once Sayaka understood why they stopped; getting stared at like that was enough to silence even the most prideful student.
“Don’t you people have anything better to do?” Kirari murmured icily, not once taking her gaze off of them. “Or shall I deal with this myself?”
“N-No, M-Miss President,” one of them stammered. They all grabbed their things and walked hurriedly out of the room.
“Well, that wasn’t very fun, was it?” the President spoke. Her voice was like honey.
A huge moment of realization struck Sayaka like lightning. Did someone, the Student Council President of all people, stand up for her? Why did she do that?
“You must be Sayaka. I’ve heard a lot about you.”
“W-What?”
How could a person with such an authoritative presence even know someone like her existed?
“As I’ve said, I’ve heard a lot about you. You’re very intelligent, aren’t you? I’ve been observing you from a distance. I have a proposition for you.”
Was the President still speaking to her? Sayaka was used to people only talking to her for a few seconds before realizing she was too boring to even continue the conversation. This was a completely new ballpark for her.
“Would you like to be my secretary?”
Out of all the possible things Kirari could have said, this was one Sayaka was not expecting.
“S-Secretary?”
“I’ve been watching you. You’re intelligent, intuitive, and hard-working; the perfect traits a secretary would have. As my secretary, you will help me complete student council tasks. You’ll follow my orders and do what I tell you to. As a reward, I’ll keep those who want to tease you away from you. So, what do you say?”
Sayaka lost her ability to speak. There was something about the President that made her stomach tie in knots and caused her heart to race. Was it that intimidating, frosty gaze? Was it her hair, ever so perfectly braided? Was it her voice, silky and sweet?
“I-I…” she stammered.
“Hmm?”
Did she want to do this?
Maybe it would be good for her. Especially for college resumes.
And plus, being around Kirari made her feel...giddy.
“I-I accept.”
The President smiled. Just seeing that smile directed at her sent pulses of warmth through her body. Then, without any warning, she pressed her forehead up against Sayaka’s.
“I’m glad.”
What is happening?!
Sayaka’s instincts screamed for her to back away. This was so unnatural to her. This was the first time anyone was ever nice to her, and the way Kirari’s skin felt against hers was...heavenly, to say the least.
After what seemed like an eternity, Kirari backed away and grabbed Sayaka’s hand. “I’ll show you to the Student Council room.”
The Student Council room was big, to say the least. A large, rectangular table was in the middle, with a couch a little bit to the right of it. What caught Sayaka’s eye was the large aquarium that seemed to take up a third of the room. Many colorful fish swam through the tank; it was almost like a rainbow.
“I see you’ve taken an interest in my aquarium,” Kirari murmured. “I too happen to be quite mesmerized by it. It is like a society; everyone’s scrambling to get to the top of the reef. I like to view the academy like this. All the students are fish attempting to get to the top of the reef.”
The way that Kirari spoke mystified Sayaka. She spoke with such ambiguity that even Sayaka found it hard to understand her. Nevertheless, her voice made her weak in the knees. What is this feeling? This...desire for the President?
“So, tell me about yourself.” The President sat down at one end of the long table and motioned for Sayaka to take a seat.
Tell her...about myself?
That was an impossible task.
This was the first time someone was ever interested in Sayaka’s life, and she didn’t know where to start. Kirari seemed like the type of person she could spill out her feelings to, and yet she was strangely reluctant. She felt if she told her what went on outside of school, she’d immediately think that she was deliberately hurting herself instead of actually having an abusive parent. That’s what everyone thought when they saw her injuries, anyway. Why would the President be any different?
“U-Um, I play the piano,” Sayaka stammered. That wasn’t a lie - she did play the piano and was actually quite good at it. She was grateful that the thought came when it did; otherwise she would have told Kirari everything. That wouldn’t have ended well.
Kirari looked at her, interest sparking in her blue eyes. “Piano?”
She fiddled with her circular braid. Sayaka found herself staring.
“You should play a song for me sometime.”
“I-I guess,” Sayaka responded with a nervous laugh.
They spent the rest of that day talking in the Student Council room. They talked about their lives, they talked about what classes they were taking. Sayaka was careful to leave out her abusive mother, and she was grateful that Kirari didn’t ask her about her family life.
The President looked at the clock. “Oh my...school got out an hour ago. Will you be okay walking home by yourself?”
Sayaka nodded her head, but was internally grateful that Kirari cared enough to ask. It was a feeling foreign to her.
“Then you’re dismissed. See you tomorrow, and remember to always arrive an hour early to school.”
Sayaka spent the entire walk home thinking about Kirari, the first person to ever treat her like a human being.
Her happiness didn’t last long, though, as she reached her hand for the doorknob to her house. She heard the sound of glass breaking on the inside, and she knew instantly that her mother had been drinking again. She trembled, knowing what was about to happen. Maybe if she walked in quietly, her mother wouldn’t notice her arrival?
Unfortunately, her wish didn’t come true. As soon as she walked inside, her mother stopped slamming wine glasses and gave her a glare of pure evil.
“Where have you been? You’re an hour late,” she snarled, making Sayaka tremble even harder.
“I-I, uh...I got a j-job at school to be the Student C-Council President’s s-secretary,” she sputtered, her heart racing as if she were going to die.
“I don’t think I give a shit what job you got. You’re supposed to be home at exactly four o’clock, and it’s five fifteen. You should be punished.”
She reached for a broken wine glass and hurled it at Sayaka. She managed to duck just in time so it wouldn’t hit her head, but it shattered against her arm instead, causing her skin to break and bleed profusely. The tears were streaming from her eyes before she could comprehend what was happening.
Her mother stormed up to her side and grabbed her by the neck; cold, cruel hands closed her esophagus, making it hard to breathe. Sayaka tried to gasp for air, but couldn’t. Her vision started to swim.
“If you arrive later than four ever again, you’re going to regret it,” her mother hissed in her ear.
The rest of the evening was spent with Sayaka’s mother hurling insults at her, and the occasional beating. Sayaka went to bed that night, tears in her eyes, silently sobbing so her mother wouldn’t hear her.
How much more of this can I take? How much longer will it be till she finally kills me?
Those thoughts haunted her the entire night, but if anything made it better, it was pleasant thoughts of the silver-haired girl that she now worked for. Sayaka hoped and prayed the entire night, that if Kirari ever found out about what her mother did, she wouldn’t brush it off and say it was Sayaka’s fault like everyone did, or say that she was only groveling for attention.
More than anything, Sayaka realized, she wanted the President's affection.