Archive of Our Own

Walking through a mall as part of a group was something Kourai was not really used to. It was a good feeling, a sense of belonging, of being part of a unit. Sort of like playing volleyball, but off the court, and with less of an adrenaline rush.

Tipping his head back, he drained the last of the tea he’d been carrying and then reached for Hakuba’s empty cup before dropping them both in the trashcan as they passed. Cold replaced the heat of the drink in a rush, and he tucked his hands in the thin material of his jacket pocket.

“Thanks”, muttered Hakuba.

Kourai nodded an acknowledgment, then turned to the front of the group. When his eyes came to rest on a crest of wavy light brown hair, a thought entered his head.

“Hirugami!” He launched himself through the air, dashing past the rest of the group to reach his friend, walking at the front. Suwa and Nozawa scowled at him, but he ignored his upperclassmen’s scolding. He probably shouldn’t have: It was the first time they’d hung out outside of school, and he’d been trying to keep a good impression. Remembering himself, he slowed to a walk when he reached Hirugami’s side, feigning nonchalance. “I forgot.”

Hirugami threw him an amused smile. “What did you forget?” He was all wrapped up in his long coat and scarf, a far smarter choice than Kourai's own light jacket. Kourai still couldn’t get used to seeing him with longer hair, but he had to admit that it did look better than the weird in-between stage when it was shaggy but not really long enough to show off his natural waves.

“You need to send me a picture of your new puppy! I told my grandparents what you told me about him, and I want to show them!”

Hirugami’s face took on a seemingly embarrassed quality for a moment, but in the time it took Kourai to blink it was back to his usual detached, calm smile.

“Okay, then.” Hirugami pulled out his phone, tapped away on it with his thumb for a minute, still glancing up occasionally to watch where they were walking, and then inclined his head slightly to Kourai.

Kourai took his own phone out to open the message and comment on how cute the photo Hirugami sent him was. Instead, he found himself dawdling until he eventually came to a halt, staring at the screen.

It wasn’t just the puppy in the picture Hirugami had sent: Hirugami himself knelt beside the young dog, staring at the camera with a cheesy smile. He was wearing a dark hoodie, and his hair fell messily about his face.

He wrinkled his nose in confusion. Hirugami had pictures of just the puppy, he knew that. Hirugami had shown him. So why had he sent Kourai that picture? It was like Hirugami was wanting Kourai to make fun of him, almost.

He only became aware that he had come to a halt when Hakuba called for him to keep up. The others had walked right past him. Even Hirugami hadn’t said anything.

Tucking his phone away he raced to catch up, falling back in step beside his much taller friend.

Whatever. It was probably just the first photo there, and it was only Kourai's grandparents that would see it. They would probably think it was cute.

*

Kourai had heard people saying that laughter was always a pleasant sound, with the one exception being the laughter of a child in the middle of the night.

Only there was another exception to that, he had discovered recently: The sound of Atsumu’s laughter, when Kourai knew for a fact that he was alone in their shared dorm room, always signaled trouble.

He poked his head around the bathroom door to see what his temporary roommate was up to, brandishing his toothbrush like a weapon, and demanded; “What’s so funny?”

Any attempt at comedy died when he spotted what it was that had prompted Atsumu’s laughter. The setter was lounging on Kourai's bunk, the lower one, with a grin that would likely terrify a lot of his fans if they ever saw it. In his hands was a phone. Kourai's phone.

Forgetting that he only had a towel wrapped around his waist and dropping his toothbrush in the process, Kourai sprinted across the dozen feet between them to leap onto the bunk.

“What the fuck?!”, he screeched. “That’s my phone, what do you think you’re doing?”

“Relax, it’s locked, idiot, I can’t get into it”, Atsumu snorted, as if that made everything okay.

He tossed the phone back to Kourai, who was secretly proud that he was able to catch it in one hand. A look downwards confirmed that it was, indeed, locked. Atsumu hadn’t even tried to open it apparently, or it would have told him the number of unsuccessful attempts to log in.

“Oh.” Kourai took a breath and rearranged his towel in a slightly more dignified manner. “What were you laughing at, then?”

“Your background.”

“Huh?” He frowned. His lockscreen was one of those that rotated between a number of photos he had in a folder he had created. Most of them were photos of his family or group pictures of him with his teammates, a few of various places he had been to. Right then, his grandparents grinned up at him. He glared at Atsumu. “You’re laughing at my grandparents?”

“What?” Atsumu guffawed with laughter. Kourai really wanted to hit him. “Nah, there was another photo just now. A guy with a dog. Who is he?”

Kourai frowned, scrambling to make sense of what Atsumu was saying. Eventually, it clicked into place. The photo of Hirugami and his dog. He’d included that in the folder, too. Mostly because of the dog.

His fists balled, Kourai replied; “That’s my friend.”

Atsumu was still grinning. He raised an eyebrow as he said; “I thought it was cute and all, you havin’ yer friend as a lockscreen.”

“I have pictures of all my friends on here.” Kourai huffed and put his phone back on charge, throwing Atsumu a look that was hopefully intimidating, and headed back towards the bathroom. “Leave my stuff alone, asshole.” He slammed the door closed behind him.

*

The train ride home from training camp was long and stuffy, and Kourai's eyelids drooped closed within half an hour of sitting on board. Luckily, he awoke in time to spy the familiar hills of home rolling in. His stop was coming up.

When the usual station came into view, he reached for his rucksack and clambered down the steps. Beginning his walk, he patted his pockets to make sure he had everything. His keys were buried somewhere in the bottom of his rucksack, where he had tossed them when he first left, but hopefully somebody would let him in so he wouldn’t have to dig them out.

Some music would be good on the walk home, he decided. Kourai pulled his phone out, and then stopped when he caught sight of his home screen. He put his phone on standby and then brought it to life again. The same image was still there.

Cursing, Kourai went into his contacts and scrolled to one that he had only recently added. He fumed silently as he listened to the dial tone.

“Hello?” God, even with one word Atsumu’s voice was obnoxious.

“You asshole”, Kourai spat.

“Did you miss me already?”

“How did you get into my phone?”

Atsumu laughed. “Oh. Kageyama helped me figure out your password.”

“What?” Kourai hadn’t expected that. But Kageyama could be a little shit, he supposed, when he wanted to be.

“Well, he kept bringing up the little giant thing that you always talk about, so I figured I’d try that, and then I tried adding your jersey number, and turned out I was right. You're too easy to read, Kourai-kun.”

The nickname grated against his eardrums. “Why did you do it?”

Atsumu snickered again. “What, I didn’t think you’d be this mad about it, jeez.”

Kourai scowled. Why was he so mad about it? It was just a picture of his best friend and his best friend’s dog. Sure, it was kind of weird to have it as his lockscreen, but nobody else had seen it and he could change it back. It wasn’t a big deal, not really.

But what if Hirugami, or one of the others, had seen it? He didn’t want any of them- especially Hirugami, who was admittedly probably his coolest friend- to think he was odd.

“Whatever.” He sighed. “I’ll get you back with a picture of Kita or something next time.” Atsumu had kept talking about his captain all the time in their room. Kourai had even overhead a frankly embarrassing conversation in which Atsumu begged somebody over the phone- presumably one of his teammates- to send him a picture one of his team had supposedly taken of Kita smiling.

He heard Atsumu splutter and smiled, feeling victorious, before hanging up.

*

“Come in quick and close the door behind you. He can be kind of excitable, so prepare yourself.”

Kourai bounced on the balls of his feet and threw his friend a grin as he unlocked the front door.

Hirugami’s house was long rather than wide, stretching right back. Kourai knew that because, when the door opened, he could see that the hallway hidden behind it stretched all the way along with doors leading off on one side to what were presumably the other rooms of the house.

It was the only impression he got before a bouncing brown missile launched itself at him, springing up and down and panting. The sound of claws pattering across the wooden floor sounded repeatedly.

“Hachiko!”, Hirugami called, but he was laughing. “Down!”

Hachiko dropped down to a seated position, and Hirugami crouched beside him, ruffling the fur on the scruff of his neck.

Warily, Kourai also knelt down, coming face to face with the creature his friend apparently loved most in the world. The dog had expressive eyebrows and bright black eyes, although they seemed almost empty as they flicked between Kourai and its owner. Then again, maybe that was just a dog thing: Kourai didn’t have much experience with them. Disgustingly, he could feel its hot, wet breath when it panted, its tongue lolling out of its mouth and its small sharp teeth exposed.

Kourai reached one hand out to stroke the dog’s head, ready to jerk away if it moved. It remained patiently still as he ran it across the velvety fur of its ears.

“Woah”, he breathed. “You’re a soft boy, huh?” He look up at Hirugami. His friend was smiling, not the cheesy grin from the photo Hirugami had sent him, but a peaceful mature expression, verging on proud. His stomach fluttered slightly. “He can jump high, too.”

Hirugami’s eyes met his. “Like you.”

Without thinking, Kourai blurted out; “Can I take another picture of you?”

“Hm?” Hirugami was frowning in confusion.

Kourai stood up. Hachiko almost leaped up with him, but Hirugami soothed him with a hum.

“Like the other one you sent me! For my grandparents. Hachiko has gotten so big they won’t believe it”, Kourai clarified. His heart was beating a little fast. Probably he was skittish about being around the dog. He had known he really wasn’t used to them, but he hadn’t been expecting to feel so nervous.

“Oh.” Hirugami chuckled. “Sure.”

He looped his arms gently about the dog’s neck and leaned his head in, still smiling that subtle smile as he watched Kourai step away, leaning against the light opposite wall. Hachiko also watched him with interest, giving a small whine that made both Kourai and Hirugami laugh, but he remained seated. He really was well-trained, Kourai thought. He didn’t have anything to worry about.

Kourai took the photo quickly, feeling bad about keeping Hachiko waiting so long when the dog clearly wanted to be moving. When he lowered his phone, nodding his head to show Hirugami he could move, Hirugami turned and pressed a kiss to Hachiko’s cheek before standing, and Kourai’s stomach fluttered again. Weird.

Hachiko skittered to his paws, dancing about Kourai and Hirugami’s feet with his head tilted back and his tail wagging.

Raising his head, Kourai found Hirugami had moved to stand right next to him. His smile was back to its normal self.

“Want to help me take him for a walk?”

“That sounds good”, Kourai croaked out, cursing himself for how strange he felt.

As Hirugami disappeared into one of the side doors, yelling to his parents that he was going to take Hachiko out, Kourai grabbed the leash hanging on a hook by the door, which set Hachiko off whining and jumping again.

“Looks like he’s ready to go”, Hirugami laughed when he reappeared. He held his hand out expectantly, and it took Kourai a minute to realize he was asking for the leash.

He handed it over.

Hoping the fresh air would clear his head and willing away whatever these weird feelings were, Kourai kept his eyes trained on Hachiko as they went out the door.

*

Kourai slouched off of the court, wiping his face in his shirt and then draining nearly a whole bottle of water. A hand clapped his shoulder, and he glanced up to see Hirugami throwing him a grin before following Hakuba and Bessho off.

He should probably have followed them, but the adrenaline was still pulsing through his veins. He wanted to see who else was still in the running, and which of his rivals- and friends- had been sent home.

Staring around the large gym, the yells and smacks of another ongoing game caught his attention, and, turning in that direction, he spotted a familiar uniform hovering courtside. Of course, they were still here.

Kourai marched up to Atsumu, ignoring Suna's intense stare and the inquisitive look another teammate- Kourai thought his name was Ginjima- gave him.

Itachiyama were playing against another team Kourai didn’t know. As he approached, Atsumu gave a low, appreciative whistle at a receive made by the other team, and then looked at him. The blond had his jacket draped over his shoulders; just like Kita used to wear it, Kourai recalled. He almost laughed.

“Hey, shorty”, Atsumu greeted him.

Kourai kicked at his leg.

“You won your match?”, the Inarizaki captain asked.

“Yeah.” Kourai moved to stand on his other side, away from Atsumu’s other teammates, and leaned against the railings. Itachiyama were winning: No surprise there. “You could’ve come and watched.”

“Itachiyama are more exciting.”

Kourai chuckled. “Don’t let Sakusa hear you saying that, he’d never let you live it down.”

“Pfft, not him.” Atsumu rolled his eyes. “Komori and the others.”

“How are they playing?” He turned to the court with interest, his eyes automatically darting to where Sakusa was about to serve. Looks like he arrived just in time.

Atsumu shrugged. “I think they struggled a bit, without their old third years, at the beginning. But they seem to have found their groove now.”

Kourai hummed. They all had, really. The thought that they were the third years now, the ones all the younger guys looked up to and tried to emulate, was both refreshing and intimidating.

They watched in silence as Sakusa served. The sound of the ball slapping against the floor had half the stadium recoiling. Kourai blew some air from the side of his mouth.

His attention was dragged away from the court when Atsumu’s brother appeared, his hands full of food from the vendors outside. He handed some to Suna and Ginjima, and then held Atsumu’s out of reach, which Kourai appreciated. He hadn't spoken to Osamu much before, but he had heard he was nicer than Atsumu; not that that was hard.

Atsumu snorted and glared at his brother, who then relented and passed it over.

It smelt tantalizing. Kourai's stomach growled.

Atsumu raised an eyebrow at him. “You hungry?”

“A bit.”

“Go buy some food, then.” He threw his head back and laughed, and Kourai wondered why he even bothered to come over. He should have avoided this court the second he saw the Inarizaki jacket.

In the background, he heard one of Atsumu’s teammates telling him he’s not even funny, but Kourai had already tuned out. He felt drained now, and all he wanted was to go back to the room and eat his entire body weight in food.

Retrieving his phone from his jacket, he tapped out a question to Hirugami: Where are you guys?

He only noticed Atsumu was peering over his shoulder when he spoke. He was leaning so close that when he talked Kourai jumped. “Is that the same guy?”

Kourai frowned at him. Atsumu’s face was still uncomfortably close, and he was smiling that predatory smile he sometimes got; usually around Kageyama, Kourai had noticed. “What?”

“The guy you’re messaging.” Atsumu’s gaze flickered downward and then back up. “His contact photo.”

His confusion lasted a second longer, and then Kourai's brain clicked into gear. He had set the photo he took of Hirugami and Hachiko- nearly a year ago now- as Hirugami’s contact photo in his cell phone.

“Oh- yeah. My teammate.” Trying to make it less weird, Kourai clicked on the image and enlarged it. “Look, isn’t his dog really cute? He’s called Hachiko, like the famous dog. He was just a puppy in the last photo, remember?”

“Yeah.” Atsumu had that evil glint in his eye, and Kourai was not comforted in the slightest. “Can I see?” He held his hand out.

“No.” Kourai held his phone away. “I don’t trust you.”

“Ah, come on. I won’t do anything, I swear. I’ll keep it right in front of you.”

“Why can’t you see from there? Your face is-”

A voice interrupted; “Hoshiumi!”

He pivoted his head so quickly he thought he might have given himself whiplash. Hirugami and Hakuba stood by the side of the gym, leaning against one of the doorways, waving to him. A couple of shorter girls hovering nearby were giving them nervous stares.

Kourai turned to call back to them that he was just coming, when he felt his phone being yanked from his fingers.

“Hey!”, he exploded. “You give that back!”

Without hesitation, Kourai proceeded to essentially climb up Atsumu’s body, his heart thumping in his ears. Atsumu shrieked as Kourai's foot connected with his side. Over Atsumu’s shoulder, he could see Hirugami and Hakuba’s bewildered faces, Atsumu’s teammates' irritated ones, and several angry adults.

He managed to get a grip on his phone and pry it from Atsumu’s hand, hopping back to the floor.

“You’re so paranoid, what the hell?” Atsumu was laughing, and that pissed Kourai off even more.

He stuck his middle finger up at Atsumu as he stormed away, pushing amongst the thinly-spread crowd who had congregated to stare at them, frantically looking through his phone and slowing his pace so he didn’t catch up to his friends straight away.

Hirugami’s photo was still there, unchanged.

Kourai went to his messages next. Atsumu hadn’t sent anything to anybody, as far as he could see. The setter likely hadn’t had time to do anything, he reasoned, his heart rate settling down.

“You okay?”, Hakuba asked when Kourai reached him. His dark brows were knitted together in concern.

“Yeah, just Atsumu being an asshole.” Kourai feigned at being casual.

Hirugami snorted. “Same as usual, then.” He looped an arm over Kourai's shoulders. “Come on, the others are waiting.”

*

Once they’d made it back to their hotel room, Kourai flopped down beside Bissho on his futon, and Hirugami settled next to him.

“What are we doing about food?”, he asked, staring expectantly round.

“We were waiting for you before we decided”, one of the first years piped up.

Hakuba nodded. “Does anybody know if there are any decent restaurants around here?”

“What about that one chain place we went to last year? I think they have one here?”, asked Hirugami.

“I wasn’t a big fan of that one, but if you liked it…”

“I’ll have a look and see what else there is”, Kourai said. To tell the truth, he hadn't liked that restaurant much either, but Hirugami had seemed to enjoy the food, so he hadn't voiced his disappointment, choosing not to start a fight over something so trivial.

He pulled out his phone and froze. Hirugami’s face was smiling up at him.

“Er… Kourai-kun?”

Slowly, so slowly, Kourai looked up, internally screaming, to meet his friend’s gaze. He had seen. Of course he had seen.

Kourai’s face had already turned red, and he felt absurdly guilty, which was ridiculous because he hadn’t done anything wrong.

Luckily, the rest of their team were debating what kind of food they wanted; even Bessho, on his other side, seemed absorbed in the conversation. Hirugami was the only one to have noticed.

“I- er.” Kourai jammed his thumb against the lock button, only the screen turned black and then immediately flickered back to life, revealing the same photo overlaid with a notification announcing his mom had texted him. So much for using the excuse of it being a slideshow of all his photos. “It was Atsumu! When he took my phone, he thought it would be funny to set that picture as my lockscreen.”

“Oh, okay…” Hirugami didn’t seem annoyed or angry; just a little confused. “Why?”

“Who knows?” He shrugged, forcing himself to laugh. He knew why, and so did Atsumu, which was the most annoying part. “He’s an asshole, like you said.”

“Hm.” Hirugami’s eyes darkened minutely. “I don’t know why you’re friends with him.”

“I’m not, not really.” Was he? To outsiders, he supposed, it probably looked like they were, but Kourai was fairly sure they were simply rivals and nothing more, training camp antics notwithstanding. “Anyway, you’re probably just jealous of him.”

He prepared for Hirugami to laugh and throw a barb back. Except Hirugami was staring at him, amber eyes wide under his soft hair.

“… Jealous?”

Kourai swallowed. “Yeah, you know, because all the girls always talk about him and go to watch him.”

“Ha, yeah. Like I’d be jealous of him.” Hirugami rolled his eyes.

Well, that was weird.

Kourai let himself relax slightly, relieved that they had stopped talking about his phone at least. Nobody else had noticed their private conversation, either; most of the others were focused on Hakuba, leaning over their first year libero to stare at his phone. The two of them were bickering over their options for food. As Kourai watched, Hirugami spoke up and gave his input.

Not a pair of eyes turned in his direction when Kourai excused himself to go to the bathroom, where he swiftly changed his lockscreen.

This time, he didn’t even dignify Atsumu with an angry phone call.

*

Graduating in spring was great in concept, Kourai thought. The weather was generally good, and the flowers were beginning to bloom, allowing for great photos; and, on top of that, there was the symbolism of new beginnings.

In practice, however, it meant that his allergies caused him to be a streaming mess throughout most of the ceremony. He hoped that, when they looked back on their photos, his friends wouldn’t think he had been crying throughout the whole thing.

“Here.” Hirugami handed him another tissue as they made their way home, and Kourai took it gratefully, wiping at his nose.

“Thanks.”

Hakuba had walked with them part of the way, along with a few other friends, but over time each of the others had split off until it was just the two of them left. There was only a short distance further before they too would go their separate ways.

Kourai snuck sideways glances at his friend and felt his chest squeezing. Hirugami had grown tall, and strikingly handsome: Growing his hair out had been a good choice. He was also fun to talk to and, although he could be frustratingly vague at times, he often had sound advice that helped Kourai unwind the spooling thoughts in his own head. Kourai didn’t want to say goodbye. What if this was the last time they ever saw each other?

“So, you’re definitely sure about quitting volleyball?”, Kourai double-checked.

Hirugami laughed, his eyes turning up to the blue skies above. “I’m sure. Is it really that hard for you to get?” There was no edge to his words, merely a hint of exasperation.

“I mean… Yeah.” Kourai frowned. “You’re good at it. I don’t get why you wouldn’t want to pursue that.”

“It’s just not what I want to do with my life.”

“That’s fair, I suppose. But-” He cut himself off. They had been down that route before, and he had no desire to start a debate now. Not when they were so close to the end.

Both of their footsteps faltered when they reached the fork where their paths diverged. Kourai shuffled his feet, rearranged his rucksack on his shoulders.

“Well”, said Hirugami, “I guess this is goodbye.”

“I guess so.” Kourai’s throat worked.

Hirugami’s eyebrows shot up under his hairline. “Are you going to cry?”

“No.” It wasn’t exactly a lie: The tears had been sitting there all day, drawn forth by the pollen, making his eyes look red. It was only now that they were threatening to spill over, and that could easily be blamed on the abundance of trees that lined their path. 

When he blinked the hot, stinging wetness away, rubbing at his face with the sleeve of his jacket, he was surprised to find that Hirugami’s eyes had also taken on a glassy quality.

“I might.” Hirugami laughed a little. “This is an obvious thing to say, but I’m really going to miss you, Kourai.”

“Yeah, I- I’m really going to miss you, as well.” Kourai gulped and squeezed his fists to his side. It felt like there was so much more he needed to say but the words simply wouldn’t come.

Hirugami stared at him expectantly for a moment, then sighed. He hooked his hands in the pockets of his pants. “If- If you ever want to hang out or anything, message or call me. I’ll be around.”

“You too.” His brain screamed at him, but Kourai's body was frozen, completely locked up. His face alternately burned with tears and froze with the gentle gusts of wind breezing across it.

Hirugami smiled suddenly, out of nowhere, and Kourai stopped crying. He took a shuddering breath. This wasn’t the end, he would have to believe that. He would see Hirugami again.

As he left Hirugami waved, and Kourai felt small and vulnerable for the first time he could remember, standing on the sidewalk and watching his friend walk away.

*

“Hey.”

A hand landed on Kourai's shoulder, and he looked up from where he had been staring down at his hands. The bench shuddered as another body joined him there.

Blinking at the dizzyingly bright lights from overhead, he met the eyes of Hirugami Fukuro. Even though Kourai didn’t know him well, it was easy to recognize him, since he looked so much like his brother. The same handsome face and earnest caramel eyes.

“Haven’t seen you in a while, Kourai”, Fukuro said with an easy grin, his hand still resting on Kourai’s shoulder. 

Kourai nodded. “Yes, it has been a while.”

Fukuro released his grip and leaned back. His muscles strained under his practice uniform as he stretched one arm and then the other. “I know I shouldn’t be showing any favoritism here as captain but, I really hope you make it. It’d be nice having someone from home on the team.”

“Yeah. It’d be good to have a friendly face around.” Relaxing slightly, Kourai took a deep breath. The other prospects were stretching and getting ready, and he figured he should probably join them soon. “That’s kind of why I wanted to try out here, actually. Hirugami- Sachirou- always used to talk about how good you were. We sometimes watched your games together.”

Fukuro grinned. He didn’t really look like his brother when he smiled, thought Kourai. His grin was too wide, too open. “He still talks about you, too. You made a big impression on him; he clearly thinks highly of you.”

Kourai's stomach fluttered again, and he cursed himself that he still felt that way, when he barely saw Hirugami anymore. The two of them still met up occasionally, usually with Hakuba too, and once with some of their old upperclassmen, but never for very long. They were all leading busy lives, and didn’t have time for each other anymore. It was the sad truth but still a truth nevertheless. 

He dipped his head respectfully to the Adlers’ captain. “I’ll try my best to live up to his praise.”

Fukuro clapped him once on the back, then jumped to his feet and moved across the gym to speak with some of the other guys trying out.

Kourai took a deep breath and stood, grounding his heels to the floor. Time to start going through the motions and get into that headspace. It wasn’t just his own need to prove himself that was driving him now: He had expectations to fulfill.

*

Agreeing to go out last night may have been a mistake. Kourai's head was pounding.

Well, as usual, it had been Atsumu’s fault.

It hadn’t even been the Black Jackals that they had played against, but EJP Raijin. Suna had apparently arranged for some of his old teammates- namely, the twins and Aran, who all happened to be free- to meet up for a sort of miniature reunion. Atsumu had then supposedly convinced one of Suna’s teammates, after dinner, to let them all go back to his place for some drinks.

A lot of the night was a blur. Kourai only recalled Atsumu and Aran waking him up at 4am, probably two hours after he went down, to say goodbye since they were heading off to make their journeys home. Komori had helped him find his jacket- in the bathtub for some reason- and walked with him to the station on his own way home. Kourai had dragged himself into his apartment with just enough time to shower and make breakfast, which remained uneaten, before he headed back out. It was a good thing, he guessed, that he had cut his hair, for his morning routine was significantly quicker.

Ignoring the queasy feeling in his stomach, he slumped into his stall.

And was immediately met by Fukuro’s teasing. “Late night last night, huh, Kourai?”

Kourai cursed under his breath. He got along well with Fukuro, and it was good having someone on the team who got his references to their hometown, but it could be a bother sometimes since Fukuro seemed to think it gave him free rein to tease Kourai.

“Yeah.” He shook his head. “Those Raijin guys can drink.”

“Perhaps you are just a lightweight, hm?”, Romero spoke up from across the room, and Kourai couldn’t find it in himself to glare at him. Romero was too nice to get mad at.

Maybe he was a lightweight, a little bit, but he could handle a few drinks at least. He wasn’t quite sure what had been in the cup that Suna had handed to him, but it hadn't been beer.

“Aw, Kourai, don’t worry, I’m sure… Hm, fifty laps or so will perk you up.” Fukuro slung an arm around his shoulders, laughing.

Scowling, Kourai pulled out his phone. In hindsight, he should have known by then that doing so after spending time with Atsumu was usually a mistake. The thought even came into his head as he unlocked it, realizing he hadn’t even actually opened his phone since waking up, only glancing at it to check the time while he rushed to make it back.

“Kourai… Why is my brother your background?”

His blood ran cold. He put his phone carefully back in his pocket and turned to look up at Fukuro.

When had Atsumu had time to do that, in between crying over Kita and cursing Sakusa for going to college and puking in Aran's shoes?

Half the room were watching him in confusion.

Finally finding his voice, Kourai stammered; “It’s a joke. Erm. He’s done it before, Atsumu. He’s an asshole, ask Sachirou.”

Fukuro raised his eyebrows and, although Kourai had noticed they were in fact very different the more time he spent with Fukuro, his captain looked for a split second exactly like his younger brother.

“Okay…” Luckily, Fukuro stopped there and didn’t bring it up further.

Kourai sighed in relief, but his stomach still twisted in knots. Would the rest of the team be talking about him now? They knew he and Hirugami were friends, right? Hirugami had been to visit them a couple of times before. Hopefully, knowing that, they wouldn’t think it was that weird.

Hunkering further down in his stall, delaying the beginning of his regular pre-practice routine, he texted Atsumu: Very funny.

Then, he changed his background back.

He blinked in surprise when, a few seconds later, he received an apology in reply to his message. Atsumu must have been hungover and regretting everything, he figured. Either that, or Osamu had his phone.

“Are you planning to get ready or are you going to stare at your phone all day?”, Sokolov asked as he walked past, quirking an eyebrow at him, and Kourai quickly scrambled to get changed. Just because he had made the team didn’t mean it gave him the right to do whatever he felt like.

As he changed, he wondered what Hirugami was doing now. Studying, likely: From their sporadic texts, it sounded like that was all he did nowadays. Kourai missed him a lot. He always tried to live a life free from doubts, without holding anything back, but his friendship with Hirugami was something so incredibly precious with him, something he didn’t want to taint. And, if that meant having a few regrets, well, that was just the way it would have to be.

*

“So, what you’re saying is, you don’t trust Kageyama as a setter?”, Kourai asked incredulously.

“I do now”, Ushijima replied, as if that made everything okay. His voice was a low rumble.

A knock sounded faintly at the door.

Ushijima continued; “Now that I’ve played with him. Of course, if Oikawa were here-”

Kourai started laughing at the way Kageyama’s face twisted upon hearing that statement- he had no idea who this Oikawa guy was, only that the way Kageyama's face fell whenever Ushijima brought him up was hysterical- only to droop to a scowl when the knocking started up again.

“Somebody get the fucking door!”, he called, aiming his voice towards the hallway where Fukuro had disappeared a minute before. It was his house, after all.

“I’m in the bathroom.” Fukuro’s words were dim and muffled. “Can one of you get it?”

“It could be the food”, Sokolov mused. He had an armchair to himself and was stretching his long frame out, legs spread along the floor. He made no effort to move.

Kageyama, seated next to Kourai on the couch, stood. “Alright, calm down.”

Kourai sipped at his beer, spreading out slightly. Being sandwiched between Ushijima and Kageyama hadn’t been a positive experience for him in terms of personal space or self-esteem.

He began to choke on his drink, however, when he saw who followed Kageyama back into the spacious living room.

“Hey.” Hirugami gazed around at all of them, somewhat awkwardly, his eyes finally coming to rest on Kourai. “Hoshiumi.”

He was still the same as ever, Kourai thought, just a bit taller and broader. His hair fell in soft waves, his eyes were bright, and his face lit with a dispassionate smile. His long coat was like a larger version of one he had worn when they were teenagers, and it reminded Kourai of that day when they had first hung out outside of school with the team as first years, all of them at the mall getting tea and just wandering through the shops, and how he had asked Hirugami for a picture of his puppy.

His heart jumped, and he felt the need to leap to his feet.

“Hiru- Sachirou!”, he cried, stumbling over both his words and the table as he moved across to greet his old friend. “What are you doing here?”

“I came to stay with my brother for the weekend.” He glanced around, taking in Ushijima’s stilted wave; Sokolov’s cheery nod; and Kageyama’s grunt of acknowledgment. “Where is he?”

As he spoke, his brother emerged from the hallway behind him, touching his arm lightly. Hirugami turned and drew Fukuro into a hug.

“How have you been? How’s school?”

“It’s been okay, I guess.” Hirugami made a face briefly. “Have you heard whether Shouko can come?”

“She’s still not sure if she can make it, but she said she’s going to try. Mom and dad are coming up tomorrow.”

“Are you all coming to watch the game tomorrow?”, Kourai asked. He didn’t really want to intrude on their family time, yet it did feel awkward just standing beside the two of them.

“Yeah. I finished a couple of exams this week, so I’m sort of free for the next few weeks. Well, more free than I was.” Hirugami grinned, and Kourai grinned back.

Another knock at the door had them both turning, but Fukuro reached it first. Kourai's head perked up when he saw his captain bringing in bags of what he could only assume was their food.

Hirugami took one of the bags from his brother, and Kourai drifted along behind them as they made their way into the kitchen.

“Hmm, my favorite”, Hirugami muttered when Fukuro set everything down on the counter. He peered inside one of the bags and then looked at his brother. “Fukuro, Kourai and I can sort this out. We’ll bring it in.”

“Are you sure?”

Hirugami shrugged. “Yeah, I know where everything is. And it'll give us a chance to catch up.” He waved a hand. “Go entertain your guests.”

Being alone in the kitchen with Hirugami was more uncomfortable than Kourai expected. He wasn’t quite sure what to say. If Fukuro had just told him he was coming, he could have prepared. That was ridiculous, of course; Fukuro didn't have to tell him every time his brother came to visit, even if he was Kourai's friend. Yet a warning would have been nice, from either of them. 

Without speaking, the two of them started pulling containers from bags and cracking them open. It smelt good. Kourai’s mouth watered and his stomach growled, and Hirugami snorted with laughter.

After a moment, Kourai said; “So, it must be nice being so free now. Did your exams go well?”

“It was a mixed bag.” Hirugami didn’t look at him when he spoke, concentrating on reaching for the remaining unopened tubs. “A couple were better than I had expected, one was really hard. I don’t think I did too well, I might have to resit that one. The practical went well, which was the one I was most worried about.” He hummed. “Hmm, I think we might have to heat some of this stuff up, it’s gotten kind of cold.”

Kourai watched him as he put a couple of the boxes into the microwave and set the timer. “What did you have to do for the practical?”

He ducked as Hirugami reached for some plates from a cupboard by his head.

“A dissection. Grim stuff.”

Kourai’s face twisted in disgust at the thought. “Yeah, I’m really glad I play volleyball for a living.”

Hirugami snickered, then set about emptying some of the containers onto plates and arranging them on trays. There was a lot of food. Kourai felt he should be helping, although he wasn’t sure what else there was for him to do.

Trying to be useful, he took some of the empty containers and threw them into the trash. It gave him a warm, almost domestic feeling, a feeling that throwing something in the trash should most definitely not give him. 

When Hirugami spoke again, he was at eye level with the microwave, peering at its contents. “So, my brother told me you had a picture of me set as your home screen.”

“Yeah. You and Hachiko.” Kourai looked away. He wasn’t sure what his face looked like, but he didn’t want Hirugami to turn around and see whatever was written there. “Atsumu keeps doing it. He thinks it’s funny.” He really should change his password.

“Is it still the same picture? The one you took?”

“Hm? Yeah, why?”

Hirugami straightened up and leaned back against the counters. “It’s just that it’s a really old photo now. It’s not very flattering.” He pulled his phone out. “Ah- here’s one.”

Kourai stared at him in confusion. What was he talking about? Hirugami waved his phone and nodded at Kourai, and a few seconds passed before he got what Hirugami was trying to tell him. Hesitantly, he produced his own cell phone, and opened the message Hirugami had just sent him.

He wasn’t sure what he had expected: If anything, he thought Hirugami may have just sent him a picture of Hachiko to avoid such situations in the future. 

Instead, the image on his screen was largely taken up by Hirugami’s face; it filled half the screen. Behind him, Kourai could make out the interior of a car, where Hachiko sat in the passenger seat, looking into the camera with the same bright black eyes Kourai remembered. His muzzle was flecked by grey but he had an intelligent, inquisitive look; that was to say, as much as a dog could look intelligent and inquisitive.

“You can use that one if you want”, Hirugami said softly.

Kourai looked up at him. His friend seemed nonchalant, still leaning against the cupboards as he removed the containers from the microwave. He probably hadn’t been thinking that way, Kourai decided. Not the same way Kourai had been thinking.

“You should come over”, Hirugami continued, wincing slightly as he caught his thumb in a wave of heat removing the lid from a box. “I need a new picture of you with Hachiko, too. He’d probably be happy to see you again.”

Oh.

Kourai's eyes were wide when they met Hirugami’s, and he prayed he wasn’t imagining the hopeful edge to the smile Hirugami was giving him. His heartbeat began to pick up slightly. He didn't feel hungry anymore.

He had never been very good at this kind of thing; flirting, dating. It wasn’t something he had ever had time for, not that he thought extra practice would exactly help him understand it any more than he already did. Perhaps this was somewhere that he would let Hirugami take the lead.

“Okay then”, he croaked. It likely wouldn’t be for a while, he knew. The off-season was really the only time he got to spend significant periods at home. But if Hirugami was willing to wait…

His hands moved of their own accord as he set the image Hirugami had sent him as his home screen, and then tilted his phone so that his friend could see what he had done. He wondered, briefly, how he was going to explain that one to Fukuro, and then decided he didn’t really care. If Hirugami said it was alright, then it was alright.

Hirugami smiled at him and took a few steps closer. “Here- let’s take one for my home screen, too.”

Kourai blinked in bewilderment yet allowed Hirugami to pluck the phone from his hands. He shuffled closer and put an arm around Kourai, and Kourai drew in a breath.

He looked up at Hirugami, who was smiling into the camera, and dug a finger into his side.

Hirugami burst out laughing, then rubbed a hand over his face. “Sorry, that’s a bit awkward, huh?”

“Yeah, you can't just surprise me like that”, Kourai snapped, but he scooted closer.

They both looked into the camera, and Kourai heard the familiar clicking noise. Hirugami pulled his phone down so they could inspect it.

His first thought was that he looked a bit odd, face kind of pink and eyes wide. He didn’t take many photos of himself. Hirugami was smiling that nice smile again, though, so he would allow it.

“Is it alright if I send it to myself?”, Hirugami asked, and he nodded.

“Of course.”

Hirugami typed away on his phone, then handed it back.

Kourai stared around the kitchen. The containers lay strewn about the surfaces, rapidly cooling. They really should get back to the others. Though there was something he wanted to say first.

He looked up at Hirugami, opening his mouth, trying to find the right words.

“Where’s the food gotten to?”

Ah.

Kourai whirled about to find Kageyama standing in the doorway, glaring at the both of them from under his dark curtains of hair.

“Just coming”, Hirugami announced cheerily. He nodded towards the counter. “Give us a hand?”

Slouching into the kitchen, Kageyama shrugged. “Sure.”

Kourai didn’t miss the speculative look his teammate threw at him. But then again, knowing Kageyama, he might have just been hungry.

He took the plates while Kageyama and Hirugami carried the food, and they spread it all out on the small table, precariously balancing some of the items together.

“Thank you, Fukuro, for the food”, Ushijima murmured. He too was eyeing the dishes with a concentrated look.

“Yes, thank you”, Sokolov echoed.

Kourai gave his own input; “Thanks.”

Kageyama mumbled what was probably a thank you, but his mouth was already full so it was difficult to tell. He at least seemed slightly happier.

Fukuro shrugged. “It’s not a problem, guys. You all deserve it for having worked so hard. It’s just a shame more of us couldn’t make it.”

“Well, a lot of them have family commitments…”, Sokolov said as he piled food onto his plate.

Half an hour later, they sat in an array about the living room, talking quietly, nobody wanting to move to clear anything away just yet.

Kourai looked down at his phone, smiling slightly when he saw the photo. However, just as he was about to come out of the messaging app, he noticed something underneath: Hirugami had texted himself from Kourai's phone.

Do you want to get dinner sometime?

And then, from his own, a reply:

I would love to.

Kourai looked up across the room to find Hirugami staring at him, with a weird mixture of amusement, embarrassment, and something else.

Grinning, he typed out another message: You smooth motherfucker.

Within a few seconds, Hirugami sent back: I try.

Then:

Do you want to?

He and Hirugami shared another smile before he typed out his answer:

Yes.

*

"And... Smile!"

"I am smiling."

"Smile wider."

"Just take the photo."

"Okay, okay." Sachirou laughed and then, a second later, he lowered his hands. "Okay, you can move now."

Kourai gave Hachiko a final hug before he got to his feet. The dog panted at him and followed his lead, somewhat less gracefully; he had gained weight in his old age.

Sachirou turned the phone to show Kourai, and Kourai blinked. It was actually a decent photo of himself. He had thought that, off the court, it was virtually impossible to get a good picture of him, but Sachirou had somehow succeeded. His ringed eyes were soft and his face mellowed with a minuscule smile, his white hair highlighted by the golden evening light.

"You look cute", the taller man hummed, and Kourai jabbed him in the side.

"Are you only calling me cute because I'm small?"

"Not at all." Sachirou raised his hands, a tiny smirk creeping onto his face. "Although, you being small definitely adds to your cuteness rather than detracting from it."

"Shut up."

Sachirou was staring at the phone again, seemingly lost in thought. "Maybe handsome would be a better word. My handsome man."

"We both know you're talking about Hachiko", Kourai snickered, but he took a hold of Sachirou's hand. "Come on, let's get home."

"Wait, I just need to set this as..."

Kourai turned to Sachirou with concern when his voice trailed away. "What is it?"

"I accidentally deleted it."

"Sachirou!" Of course, the one good photo...

"Come on, let's take another one. I want to send it to my sister too, she never gets to see you."

Sachirou's begging eyes were going to be the death of him. "Okay, but don't show Fukuro. I see too much of him. He'll just make fun of me."

"Actually, let's take one together."

"Make up your mind already", Kourai grumbled, fidgeting. He loved joining Sachirou for his walks with Hachiko when he got the chance, but the dawdling- often consisting of Sachirou insisting Hachiko needed to take his time to scent the area- often set him on edge.

Sachirou knelt down beside Hachiko and motioned for Kourai to kneel next to him. Kourai immediately drew himself up so that they were the same height, and Sachirou chuckled.

"Did you get it?", Kourai asked when Sachirou lowered his cell phone a minute later.

"Hm."

"Let me see, then?"

Sachirou stood and considered. "Nope."

"Sachirou."

Relenting, Sachirou held the phone out and showed the image to Kourai. The three of them were clustered close together, and- despite the difference in species- they wore identical expressions of contentment. They looked...

They looked like a family.

Gaping slightly, Kourai got to his feet, turned to Sachirou, and tugged on his sleeve.

"Sachirou."

"Hm?" He was idly watching Hachiko.

"Sachirou."

This time it caught his attention; Sachirou looked to Kourai, eyebrows raised. "Yes?"

"There's something I need to tell you, and it's been true for a long time", Kourai began.

"You like me?"

He floundered slightly, his irritation increased by the detached smile Sachirou gave him. "Yes. How did you know what I wanted to say?"

"I mean, it was kind of obvious", said Sachirou.

"You piece of shit liar", Kourai laughed. "You told me you had no idea whether I liked you or not when you asked me out."

"Yeah, but... I know now. Also, we're dating, so it would be kind of awkward if you didn't like me."

"I guess." Kourai linked their hands together once more as they resumed their walk, letting his thumb brush against the old scars on Sachirou's knuckles. "Aren't you going to say you like me, too?"

"I thought that was obvious as well."

"Sachirou."

Sachirou pulled them both to a halt, Hachiko dancing around their legs. Leaning down so that his amber eyes could meet Kourai's, he pressed their lips together and then whispered; "I like you, too."

"Great!" Kourai landed another kiss for good measure, then squeezed Sachirou's fingers. "Now let's go home."

He could hear Sachirou's laughter behind him as the three of them strolled along, Kourai leading Sachirou and Hachiko leading him.